00:00This is Heather. She fell in love with Jay.
00:05This couple initially enjoyed a monogamous relationship.
00:08Love him so much.
00:10Until a chance work encounter made them fall into the world of polyamory.
00:14From our first experience that sparked something and then we were like wow this is fun.
00:20From there we just decided to like explore more.
00:23We actually sat down one day and we defined our home rules.
00:27When this couple went public with their polyamorous lifestyle,
00:30they were so popular they even had to create an application form to filter potential dates.
00:35He's cute.
00:37Who's that?
00:38I would describe myself in bed as a freak, a receiver, a starfish.
00:42Which one would you describe yourself as?
00:44A freak.
00:45However, their hunt for a third hasn't always been the smoothest of journeys.
00:50Yeah we've definitely been catfished before.
00:58Hello.
01:00Welcome to the playhouse.
01:05Hi my name is Heather and this is my partner Jay.
01:08We met at a bar and I was with some of my friends and I asked one of the girls to come back with me
01:16so that we could all three of us be together but it turned out that it ended up just being me and Jay.
01:21And now nearly 11 years later here we are.
01:28This is the cinema room.
01:31This is where all the fun happens.
01:34This is just where we watch movies.
01:36Heather and Jay enjoyed a conventional relationship until a chance work encounter
01:41opened their minds to another sort of lifestyle.
01:44We didn't even know what polyamory meant at the time.
01:46The first experience we had is I was actually selling a car from home
01:50and the buyer who came around to look at the vehicle was a relatively good looking female about the same age.
01:55Being the salesman that I was, I was flirting a little bit trying to get the sale across the line.
01:59Just as she was about to leave, Heather walked through the front door.
02:02Five minutes later I got a text message on my phone from the potential buyer
02:06and she said is that your girlfriend?
02:08Heather and I communicated with her and the day that she picked the vehicle up
02:11was the first time that we experienced everything that polyamory had to offer so to speak.
02:18That like sparked something and then we were like wow this is fun.
02:22We started seeing couples just from having experience and trying different things.
02:28It just grew more and more and more.
02:30I decided to just put it out there on my social media.
02:33It can at first sort of come as a shock.
02:35And I didn't get great reactions from a couple of people.
02:39But yeah for it to be healthy with your relationship you've both got to be into it.
02:43In saying that though we had so many amazing responses as well.
02:51Overwhelmed with messages, Jay and Heather decided to create an application form to filter potential dates.
02:57Playhouse is basically a concept that Heather and I came up with together.
03:01We've also got interplayhouse.com which is our website where you can connect with us as well.
03:06Yeah I like how she's answered that. That's hot.
03:09Yeah for sure.
03:10She's cute.
03:12Oh holy.
03:14Who's that?
03:16Oh my god.
03:17Click on them.
03:18What was their compatibility like?
03:1989%. That's good because some of our questions are trick questions.
03:24Yeah that's pretty good.
03:25Yeah just change this bit to...
03:28You always make it way more flirty than me.
03:32We decided to do the application process because we were getting an influx of DMs.
03:40And we just wanted to find a fast track to sort through them.
03:43The applicants that stand out to us the most are the ones that actually put thought into their answers.
03:50They make it a little bit funny, a little bit quirky, a little bit sexy.
03:54Because we don't like bland and boring do we babe?
03:56No.
03:57So when you see the emails come through on the subject line it will say percentage.
04:01So we know if it comes from the 90s it's one that we'll check out.
04:05Where it's scary is if it comes from the 90s and it's from somebody called John or Bill.
04:10And then you remember some of the questions and you're like hmm.
04:13How do you make Jay happy?
04:16John you cannot do that.
04:18Yeah I feel like we do quite often get a few comments about why it's only girls that can apply through our application page on our website.
04:26The reason for that is I'm straight and...
04:30And I'm bi so I like getting with girls whereas Jay doesn't like getting with males.
04:36So for it to be a relationship with three people and there to be a male involved wouldn't work so well.
04:44I love this question.
04:45My sexual drive is?
04:46Answers.
04:47Not very strong.
04:48Pretty average I guess.
04:49I get turned on in the fruit section at Woolies.
04:53I would describe myself in bed as a freak, a receiver, a starfish.
04:58What would you describe yourself as?
05:00A freak.
05:02If we don't get 100% on our own quiz.
05:0494.
05:0594?
05:06What did we get wrong?
05:07I feel like there's a couple in there that you could go either way.
05:10Just a couple or else we'd get it wrong.
05:13When we see someone we like the next step for us is just having a conversation with them.
05:18Talking to them and seeing if we do build a connection that way.
05:24And then also I like to go out and meet the girl for like a nice dinner date.
05:28Even like a walk on the beach.
05:30Somewhere where we can talk and get to know each other a little bit more.
05:35And then yeah that's when Jay comes in as well if I do build a connection with her.
05:41I find poly really exciting because I absolutely love meeting new people and making fun and exciting connections with people.
05:51I like going out to dinners, having drinks and sharing that with my partner as well.
06:00Yeah that looks good.
06:06I don't feel like I get nervous meeting someone for the first time.
06:09She doesn't, it's like a party trick.
06:10No I don't.
06:11I get nervous.
06:12She does.
06:13I don't, I get excited.
06:16Have you had anyone try and catfish you both?
06:19Oh yes.
06:20Yeah we've definitely been catfished before.
06:22We have.
06:23Which is really awkward.
06:25Yeah.
06:26When you're sitting at the table and the person that you expect to turn up is not the person that turns up.
06:32Yeah.
06:33We still have fun.
06:34We do.
06:35We still have a good time.
06:36It just doesn't go where we were wanting it to.
06:45It's very similar to this when we meet a third and we bring them on a date.
06:49We take them out for like a nice drink and some food.
06:53We feel like we blow people's minds a little bit so sometimes when we're out on a date
06:57if we're all getting on very well I'll walk to the bar to get a drink for example with
07:02Heather and be sort of touchy feely and then the next time we'll walk to the bar to get
07:07a drink with the other girl.
07:09So we sort of, people give us some funny looks.
07:12The biggest thing that I think I have learnt about love since starting this lifestyle is
07:20that love is something that you can give to multiple people without taking it away from
07:27your one true love.
07:29What about you?
07:30People express love in different ways and people also receive love in different ways.
07:36Definitely.
07:37So I guess this has just sort of expanded our horizons as to how love works.
07:41We are currently still on the look for the perfect person that's compatible with both
07:46of us but we've definitely met some cool people and had some really cool experiences.
07:50We'll keep going until we find somebody permanent.
07:54It's something that we both find really enjoyable and fun.
07:57Why stop?
07:58Why stop?
Comments