00:00 [upbeat music]
00:02 - Listen, I consider myself a watermelon aficionado.
00:12 I go bang, bang, bang every day, new watermelon.
00:16 That's great.
00:17 A lot of people go to a local grocery store
00:19 and get a watermelon.
00:21 Don't talk to me about being a watermelon expert,
00:25 king aficionado, unless you're doing what I'm doing.
00:28 Right here, let's open it up.
00:31 Yeah, I can go to a local store and get watermelons.
00:33 Any Tom, Dick, Harry can do that.
00:36 Let's open this box.
00:37 Unboxing vibes, deja vu, don't wanna cut my finger.
00:40 By the way, I don't know if you can see that scar
00:44 right there, that's from the unboxing when I cut my finger.
00:47 How is this, what is this, a knife?
00:49 What is this, you push it?
00:50 What is this?
00:51 I think I just sliced my fucking hand.
00:55 I don't even wanna look.
00:56 No, I did, why don't?
00:57 No, I'm all right, but I'm cut.
01:00 I fucking sliced my finger apart.
01:02 Now, am I gonna cry about it?
01:03 Yeah.
01:04 Every time we put that video on the internet,
01:07 they say, they say it's too graphic.
01:11 So here we go.
01:13 This is what people in the business call,
01:16 bah-da-da, let's get this all out.
01:20 Ready?
01:21 Are you boys ready?
01:22 I have such a bad shoulder.
01:25 This is a Smith County watermelon.
01:30 The biggest, the baddest, the best.
01:33 Look at the size of my head.
01:36 The best watermelons in the planet.
01:39 You ain't a watermelon
01:40 unless you're a Smith County watermelon.
01:42 So here we go, Brandon Walker's the one
01:44 who introduced me to him.
01:45 He hasn't done much right in his life, but he did do that.
01:49 So here is a Smith County watermelon.
01:52 Woo, look at that red.
01:54 That is, that'll make you tickle all the way
01:58 from your head to your toes.
01:59 What is that song, Nora Jones or something?
02:01 And how am I cutting this?
02:02 Like, oh, the smell.
02:04 Absolutely.
02:05 And then you go like this.
02:07 Look at this.
02:08 Are you looking?
02:10 Are you salivating on the Smith County watermelon?
02:13 It's a little bit bruised because it traveled so far.
02:17 It obviously, yeah, you get the tool.
02:19 Smith County watermelons.
02:22 I'm drooling just cutting it up.
02:24 Here we go.
02:25 I just can't.
02:33 It's a 9-8 watermelon.
02:43 Smith County watermelon.
02:45 Ain't no party like a Smith County watermelon party.
02:48 My God.
02:49 If you don't know, figure it out.
