00:00There's actually a saying that I really love, which is like the things that you most love at the beginning
00:03of the relationship are sometimes the things that make it end, which is like pretty scary.
00:15Here with Elf Cosmetics.
00:17This song is kind of a roller coaster of emotions because there's like really dramatic parts and then there's like
00:22just like parts that I'm laughing at myself and that I'm making fun of myself and then I get sentimental
00:26and then I get a bit like sour.
00:28So I feel like when you end the relationship, all those emotions like coexist.
00:50So the first verse is like the context, like when romantic love ends and you have it like so in
00:58tus narices, like right in front of your face.
01:00You don't see things clearly and sometimes you need people from your family or your friends or people that have
01:06like seen you go through your processes, help you like zoom out to not only learn from the parts that
01:11I could do better, but also like appreciate all the beautiful parts too.
01:32So the song isn't really about like me ending a relationship.
01:35It's kind of me learning how to be by myself and learning how to be okay with myself before centering
01:41my life around romantic love.
01:43I felt in certain instances like I have like lost a spark that I used to have when I was
01:49a teenager and like super doe-eyed and super excited about the world.
01:54So in that pre, I kind of say I miss the days that I used to think that the roof
01:59was taller and I used to talk to my pillows at night.
02:02So it's just like a metaphor about being naive about life and ignorance is bliss.
02:27So in the first part of the chorus basically translates to I'm not in the footnotes of your story anymore,
02:35which is so cliche to say in English.
02:38And then I say, you know, instead of that, I'd rather like dance with my own shadow in the kitchen.
02:42I'd rather be my own company first.
02:45And this concept of like, oh, you know, I can be alone by myself at night and like still feel
02:50whole and still feel good.
02:51And I can find my own personality without thinking of this other person's opinion.
02:57I feel like that's such a wild concept when you haven't practiced it in many years.
03:03It's also kind of like a bit of like a spiteful way to be like, girl, it's going to be
03:08like this.
03:08I'd rather just be by myself.
03:28So I feel like the first half of the chorus is a bit more like emotional and the second part
03:34of the chorus is honestly just like fun.
03:36And I say, if you like how my face looks in, I guess, in a simple way, I'll actually go
03:45with a lot of makeup on.
03:46And I don't know if it's like if it's this way and maybe other Latin American countries, but in Venezuela,
03:52which is where I'm from, it doesn't necessarily mean like I look good.
03:55My makeup looks good.
03:56It means like I'm going with a full B.
04:00So it's just like a sarcastic, like fun way of writing it.
04:20I remember one day I was having like the shittiest day and I walk onto the metro, onto the subway
04:26in Madrid.
04:27Next to me, this little girl sits down and she was so happy.
04:30And I remember she would like grab her mom's lipstick and she would just like put it on her and
04:34she was playing around and she would look at me and try to talk to me.
04:36And I feel like I saw a part of me and her and it might sound a bit like poetic
04:41or weird, but I really honestly think it was a sign.
04:43The last line of that verse is my favorite because I say that girl was me, but I gave someone
04:48else my star.
04:49And I tried to include that in like other songs and nothing was coming out until finally it came out.
04:55And that's the first thing that I had for the song.
05:16So I feel like that last line, I'm saying, oh, I can't love someone if I don't love myself first.
05:20But it just like, if I'm being very honest with you, I kind of regret putting it there.
05:24I love what the line says.
05:26I wish I would have just like stayed being like funnier.
05:29I just, I hate that I always have to like go so deep.
05:32My mom always tells me something.
05:33She says, Joaquina, le snorkele, le snorkele.
05:36Cause like, she's like, pull out your snorkel cause you're going too deep.
05:57So in the outro, I say, which is one of like my favorite mottos or phrases in Spanish.
06:05And it translates to the tongue is the body's punishment.
06:09That's the direct translation.
06:10And basically what that means is like, be careful what you wish for.
06:14I'm kind of like taking a spin on it because I'm saying like, wow, it's true.
06:18The tongue is the body's punishment because I said that I was going to die if you ever left,
06:23but I'm still alive.
06:24And yeah, I wanted to end the song with like something that felt heartfelt and felt like
06:29it was a conclusion, but at the same time, wasn't like too dramatic.
06:33And I have no problem with being dramatic.
06:35Like I'm always dramatic.
06:39I didn't want it to sound like a song that was like a dig at the other person,
06:42which is like, I write songs that are also digs, you know, in other moments.
06:46I'm just kidding.
06:47But this one, like I really didn't want it to feel that way.
06:49Because that's, that's not how I felt.
06:51I kind of wanted to write about the end of this relationship from like,
06:54maybe I allowed you to change me and it might've been my fault.
