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00:13It set the whole world on fire.
00:17Oh, hell yeah!
00:21Yes!
00:22Yes!
00:36Kia ora koutou and welcome to Taskmaster.
00:40Every year I dream up a bunch of pointless tasks for desperate people to attempt.
00:46And then I just watch them like a pervert.
00:48It's an admin-heavy kink, but Daddy has a specific thirst,
00:54which can only be quenched by being the Taskmaster.
01:01Ticking my boxes tonight are Comedians Dave Wharei,
01:06Claudia Hortini,
01:10Morgana O'Reilly,
01:13Lees Mathewson,
01:14and Rose Matafeo.
01:18And to my left, wagging the tail of this dog,
01:21it's my handy assistant, Paul Williams!
01:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
01:28Can we have the prize task now, please?
01:30Absolutely, Jeremy.
01:31So, as always, we've asked our contestants to bring in a prize.
01:34The winner of the prize task will receive five points.
01:36The winner of tonight's episode will take home all five prizes.
01:40Tonight, we've asked our contestants to bring in the best spiky thing.
01:45Ooh!
01:46Yes.
01:47OK, Rose.
01:48What spiky thing did you bring in?
01:50Look, Jeremy.
01:52We're not young anymore, OK?
01:55And so I think, for me, the best thing on this earth is a spiky massage ball.
02:01Now, the haters are going to say that I went past Kmart Henderson.
02:09And picked the first thing I saw that was spiky.
02:11And to them I say, prove it, bitch.
02:14It kind of looks like COVID.
02:16Hey!
02:18Hey, Paul!
02:20So rude!
02:22Morgana, what have you been?
02:23It's savoury and sweet.
02:25It's a cheese and pineapple hedgehog.
02:28Everybody gets a piece!
02:30What's underneath the tin foil?
02:33Pineapple is a classic.
02:35This is an actual hedgehog.
02:40But I've covered it with tin foil for hygiene.
02:45Dave, what did you bring in?
02:47When I finished my masters in spikeology,
02:51I was drawn to a certain book by the one great, Spike Milligan.
03:00I really think you should rethink the term spikeologist,
03:02because it sounds like you spike people's drinks.
03:04That is really terrifying.
03:07That was my other idea.
03:10But I thought for the safety of all those involved,
03:14you know, good old Spike Milligan.
03:15And page 38 is the one to go for.
03:19What's on page 38?
03:20Ah, let me win and I'll show you.
03:24Rhys, what did you bring in?
03:26It's four words.
03:27It's spiky, but it's also the height of luxury.
03:30It's a pyramid of Ferrero Rocher's.
03:32Ooh!
03:35So the spike is the top of the pyramid?
03:37No, no, no.
03:38The spike is the Rocher.
03:39If you were to peel back the foil, it's spiky.
03:43Would you say spiky or would you say knobbly and craggy?
03:46I think spiky.
03:47If you gave one to a blind person, they wouldn't be like,
03:50ooh, how smooth.
03:55Clarny, what did you bring in?
03:57Do you know the Shakti mat?
04:00Ah, the spiky mat that you lie on.
04:02Oh, spiky to you.
04:03To me, boring, okay?
04:06I fall asleep on a Shakti mat.
04:08If I got a newborn baby, that's where I put the baby, okay?
04:13I need something a little more extreme,
04:15so I've created a more extreme Shakti mat.
04:18Oh!
04:19Ouchie!
04:21If you zoom in, this is...
04:25Why is Dave's hair stuck to me?
04:29That's hot glue gun, actually.
04:31Alright, is it time to score these ones?
04:34Yes, please.
04:34I'm going to start by saying one point for Rhys Mathewson.
04:38Because I do love Ferrera Shays, but for me,
04:40they're a little more knobbly and craggy.
04:42I'm going to go two points for Hawane,
04:45because he's combined two of the things I hate the most,
04:47which is thumbtacks and camping.
04:49I'm going to go three points for Dave in his Spike Milligan book.
04:53I'm a huge fan of Bad Jelly the Witch.
04:55I'm going to go four points for Rose,
04:58because I've got terrible plantar fasciitis
05:00and I could do with one of those things.
05:01Well, get that in your face.
05:02And then I'm going to go five points for Morgana,
05:04because I love the cheese hedgehog.
05:06Okay.
05:07CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
05:09All right, Paul.
05:11Hit us with the cruise cars.
05:13Meet now at Paul.
05:14Here is the next time of Gaio.
05:16Go for Nielsen.
05:27Hello, Morgana.
05:30Hello, Rose.
05:32Your sources again?
05:37Oh.
05:39Write and shoot a Scandinavian noir film.
05:43Your film must be in a Scandinavian language
05:46and heavily feature this...
05:48this...
05:50sc-rack-brit.
05:52This...
05:53s-trick-brit.
05:55The script for your film must have exactly 42 words of dialogue.
06:00And at least three characters.
06:03Most Scandinavian film wins.
06:06You have 45 minutes?
06:08Turn stretch now.
06:09Yeah. Cool. Super cool.
06:14Dub over this Scandinavian film in English.
06:17Dub over this Scandinavian film in English.
06:21You must play every character in the film.
06:24You must each play at least one character from the film.
06:26You may not use a dictionary...
06:28Or anything dictionary-adjacent.
06:31You may not leave the study.
06:32Best re-dubbing wins.
06:34You have 15 minutes.
06:35Your time starts now.
06:38Whoa.
06:39Which of the three languages would you like?
06:42I'm Norwegian.
06:43Okay.
06:44Kunst.
06:45Kanst.
06:46Kanst.
06:46Kanst.
06:47What are you calling me?
06:49Kanst.
06:50You mean art.
06:52Not where I'm from.
06:56Let's just go Norway.
06:58Okay.
06:58So, I think the film is gonna go.
07:00You're incredibly abusive.
07:02Yeah, but just stick to the task.
07:04Okay.
07:05February.
07:06The sky was dark.
07:07As dark as my mood.
07:09February.
07:10Himlen war murk.
07:12You're dead.
07:13You're dead.
07:14You're dead.
07:16Maybe it's a lone policewoman like in The Killing.
07:26Where are you, you bastard?
07:28You're dead.
07:30It needs a femme fatale, right?
07:32Please, I need help.
07:34No, get out.
07:35You look like my dead wife.
07:36Rush us here.
07:38You drink a yelp.
07:39No.
07:40Come there, dude.
07:42You're certain you're the corner.
07:44And then I say, look over there.
07:46Say that.
07:50Maybe I push her down the stairs.
07:55The apple shines brightly in the mind of a child.
08:02Help, help.
08:03Where are you?
08:05Help.
08:06What are you?
08:07Oh, you're just keeping her down there doing your laundry.
08:10I have to iron.
08:11He makes me iron.
08:13Come for Mike to Ostracca.
08:16Maybe I'm like, that's noir.
08:18You just say that's noir at the end.
08:20Yeah.
08:22They are noir.
08:30That's brilliant.
08:32I love it.
08:34That was incredible.
08:35That was really good.
08:36Do you want to be Morgana or Paul for the first scene?
08:39I could be Morgana.
08:43And go.
08:47What a great task.
08:50Okay.
08:51Two great actors.
08:53I'm looking forward to seeing these.
08:54Interesting that you guys chose Norwegian.
08:57It seemed like the most Scandinavian.
09:00I thought it was the easiest.
09:02Or that.
09:02Yeah.
09:03Have you guys done any ADR work before?
09:06Any additional dialogue recording?
09:08Never.
09:08Never.
09:09You were in Moana too?
09:11Yes, I have.
09:17Yes, I have.
09:19We were in Moana too!
09:21Okay.
09:22Time for a break now.
09:24And time to let our friends in Scandinavia know that we respect your culture.
09:28We're just trying to make some good cunts.
09:30We'll see you soon.
09:45Welcome back to Taskmaster.
09:47Where our comedians are trying to out Scandinavian each other like an Ikea bookcase stacked with
09:53salt licorice fighting a sauna full of pickled herring.
09:56That's right Jeremy.
09:58Our contestants must dub over their teammates Scandinavian language films.
10:03Up first, recreating the words for Morgana's Scandi film noir, It's Hwani and Rhys.
10:19This is where she is.
10:25Hello.
10:26Hi.
10:27Who are you?
10:29I'm looking for my mother.
10:31Yeah.
10:34Oh, there she is.
10:39My guy, my guy.
10:40Be quiet.
10:46Mom.
10:48Help.
10:49Mom.
10:50Help.
10:51Where are you?
10:53Here.
10:55I'm filled with grief.
10:58You've come for me, my daughter.
11:03Mama, I've missed you.
11:08You don't look so good.
11:16Oh no, that's not good.
11:24Look who just got themselves into Moana 3.
11:30Interesting Hwani.
11:31Was there an accent there?
11:33I was sort of trying to work out what accent was going on.
11:37Pretty sure it was a New Zealand accent.
11:39With one word.
11:41Hello.
11:44Run me through the plot.
11:46So you're looking for your mum.
11:47Yeah.
11:48Then you injected Paul with some kind of drug.
11:52Yeah.
11:52To knock him out.
11:53And then you found your mum ironing and she died.
11:56Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:57He was holding her there, you know.
11:59He makes me iron.
12:00You remember from the behind the scenes?
12:01That's inspired by Shakespeare.
12:03You know, yeah.
12:04Yeah.
12:05Right.
12:05I'm keen to see another one of these, Paul.
12:07Up next is The Team of Two with a film from Rose and dubbing from Dave.
12:12Okay.
12:13February in the heart of Munich.
12:17Munich land.
12:19Where the munchkins are made.
12:21You come in like a blister.
12:25What's going on here with the blisters and all?
12:29Your salami's out.
12:31Your milk top looks terrible.
12:44What the?
12:47The trolley bus doesn't come here anymore.
12:53Oh no.
12:56Your heart's broken.
12:58It's really broken.
12:59It's really broken.
13:00It's really broken.
13:01Your heart's really broken.
13:02It's Burkentown.
13:03I'm breaking.
13:04Yeah.
13:04It's so bad.
13:08Do you think, Rose, that Dave's dubbing was in keeping with your theme?
13:15Well, I mean, it was basically a direct translation.
13:18Yeah.
13:18Yeah, your salami's out.
13:20Is that one of the lines?
13:21What?
13:21The quote was, you come in like a blister.
13:24Your salami's out.
13:25Your milk top looks terrible.
13:29Do you see the offence that she took to that?
13:32How hurt she was?
13:34That's one of the harshest things you can say to a Norwegian.
13:38How would you like to score it?
13:40Oh, they were both.
13:41Great.
13:42I thought, to be honest, this is quite difficult to judge.
13:45Four points for the team of three.
13:47Okay.
13:47And I'll go five points for the team of two.
13:50Okay.
13:56Where does that leave us with the scores, Paul?
13:59Out in first, equal.
14:00It's Morgana and Rose on nine points each.
14:08Now that we are officially past the halfway point, I would love an update on the series
14:14scoreboard if you could, Paul.
14:15Absolutely.
14:16Out in first with 91 points, Morgana.
14:20It's close.
14:25Time to move on, Paul.
14:26What's next?
14:27This task has no signs of something being wrong with it.
14:46Hmm.
14:53Hell yeah.
14:54Hi, Paul.
14:56Hello, Dave.
14:58Wow.
14:59Paul, that's comically large.
15:01There was a mix-up at the printing place.
15:04Paul, that task makes you look so skinny.
15:08You look like Mike TV.
15:10Oh.
15:15Hey, Paul, can you pretend to walk down some stairs behind the task?
15:23Really good, man.
15:25Oh, no.
15:33Okay.
15:34Wave the correct red flag.
15:36Fastest wins.
15:37Your time starts now.
15:40This is one of those riddle ones.
15:42My brain does not work like that.
15:45Wave the correct red flag.
15:45There's a red flag.
15:50Who is going to be the first to run this crimson signal up the flagpole?
15:55Up first, it's Huani, Morgana and Rose.
15:58Why are you here?
15:59What is that?
16:00Toast?
16:04Do I just go down there and wave that flag?
16:09God damn it.
16:11They're there.
16:12There's one there.
16:13There's one.
16:15There's one.
16:15Is that correct?
16:15It's not correct.
16:18I've not stopped the clock.
16:19Okay.
16:20That's not it.
16:22I've not stopped the clock.
16:23Shit.
16:24That one's all the way across the river.
16:27You're going to ignore that one?
16:28Well, I thought I might go try the other one first.
16:31Okay.
16:35There was that bread.
16:36Red.
16:36That's weird.
16:38This show makes me feel like a conspiracy theorist.
16:41Right.
16:41Red flag, man.
16:42Red flag.
16:43I've not stopped the clock.
16:44I've not stopped the clock.
16:45Two flags.
16:46I've not stopped the clock.
16:49I've not stopped the clock.
16:51Ugh.
16:53Red flag?
17:01Red flag.
17:04Well, I'm going to have to go to that one, aren't I?
17:06Okay.
17:06I'll come in case one of the sheep chases you.
17:09Just be alert of sheep.
17:11I can't stress that enough.
17:13They've seen us.
17:14They're coming.
17:15Go, Rose, go.
17:16Stop!
17:17Stop!
17:18Stop!
17:19Keep going.
17:22I've not stopped the clock.
17:23I've not stopped the clock.
17:26I've not stopped the clock.
17:34I've not stopped the clock.
17:35Okay.
17:37That's not the correct flag.
17:38I hope that sheep kills you.
17:40Go that way.
17:41Why?
17:42Because the sheep, they're running after you.
17:44Oh, my God.
17:47I think they like the color red.
17:49They're like bulls.
17:51Go, Rose.
17:55You okay?
17:56I was fighting for my life and you put me in that position.
18:00Sorry.
18:01What are you looking for?
18:02I don't know.
18:02I thought this might be a clue.
18:04Maybe that means there's something...
18:06Oh, that's close to breaking.
18:10That's not the correct flag, so...
18:12Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
18:14Red flag.
18:16Red flag.
18:17Red flag.
18:18Bread.
18:19What does the bread mean?
18:20Bread like ducks?
18:21I'm gonna try and wave the bread flag.
18:24It wasn't the bread flag, was it?
18:26All the information you need is on the task.
18:28Why was there a bread stick up there, man?
18:30Wave the...
18:34Wave the correct bread flag.
18:44I've stopped the clock.
18:45I've stopped the clock.
18:46I've stopped the clock.
18:47I've stopped the clock.
18:49I've stopped the clock.
18:50I've stopped the clock.
18:50Pretty fun.
18:51Bread flag is the bread flag.
18:53This whole time bread flag.
18:54Did you see what happened to me down there?
18:56You got chased by a pack of sheep.
18:59Don't...
18:59Don't you dare laugh.
19:00The camera crew, don't you dare laugh.
19:02I've heard that.
19:12One of my favourite things is to watch Taskmaster contestants running around in the Taskmaster hinterlands out of breath pointlessly.
19:21Yeah.
19:21My new favourite thing is watching Taskmaster contestants running in the hinterlands being chased by livestock.
19:29Welcome back to New Zealand, babe.
19:32It was genuinely one of the most terrifying experiences of my...
19:37Like, I thought Paul was joking when he went, run!
19:39And they turned and there were sheep humming for me.
19:44They've cut out Paul laughing a lot because he really tickled him.
19:50Morgana, your spidey senses told you that something was up with the bread.
19:54And then you went, no, I'm just going to keep going, keep chasing these flags around.
19:57I know.
19:58Even once I sort of went, I'll try the bread flag because there's no other choice.
20:02I was still like, they don't get it.
20:06Hawani, you picked it up and you had it.
20:08Yeah.
20:08You just needed to jiggle it.
20:10Even watching it, I was like, it looks like he's jiggling it a little bit.
20:13Yeah, could we all three argue? We kind of wiggled it.
20:16Yeah, they all three picked it up, but by my definition, wave was a clear back and forth motion.
20:22That's crazy though, because by my definition, a wave is just a slight jiggle.
20:27Please tell me that they weren't flapping around too long in the Taskmaster hinterlands.
20:31So, Morgana, 15 minutes and 40 seconds.
20:35Hawani, 10 minutes 42.
20:37Rose, 30 minutes and 2 seconds.
20:41Alright, might be time for us to wave a white flag as we cowardly retreat for a break.
20:46We'll see you soon.
21:00Welcome back to Taskmaster, where our five comedians are struggling to read the small letters of a task,
21:07once again proving they never read the fine print.
21:10That's right, Jeremy.
21:11Our task is not to wave a red flag, but a bread flag.
21:15Up next, Dave Nane and Yeast Mathewson.
21:21Your time starts now.
21:23Wave the correct red flag, fastest wins, your time starts now.
21:26Wave the correct...
21:28This is a flag.
21:31Yeah.
21:32I've stopped the clock.
21:35You've stopped the clock?
21:36Yeah.
21:37I did it.
21:38Yeah.
21:39It feels like a trap.
21:43Okay.
21:44Yeah.
21:46Yeah.
21:46Yeah, let's talk about it.
21:52Yeah.
21:56That's how you do it.
21:58Don't look at me when you say that.
22:01It must feel good, Rhys.
22:02It felt good, but I mean, I've had tunnel vision in a previous task this series.
22:07When we saw their one, that was the first I found out there were giant red flags on the field.
22:14I had not seen them at all.
22:16I didn't see them.
22:17I was like, there's no red flags, I guess I'll just wave this, it'll be wrong.
22:20It felt slightly anticlimactic, didn't it?
22:23I mean, how long did it take those guys?
22:25So...
22:25I don't go around shitting on your achievements.
22:30How many seconds did it take them?
22:32Dave, 10 seconds.
22:34Rhys, 6 seconds.
22:35Wow.
22:37So, one point for Rose, two points for Morgana, three points for Hoani, four points for Dave, and five points
22:43for Rhys Mathewson.
22:47All right, for all things, heating up in the kitchen, but I haven't had my fill.
22:52Got a little tasky for me to nibble on.
22:54What do we want?
22:56Another task.
22:57When do we want it?
22:58Now.
23:10Paul?
23:11Hello Morgana.
23:12Hello Rose.
23:13Hello Paul.
23:14Hey Paul.
23:15How you doing?
23:15I feel like a million bucks.
23:17Crazy, that's so much money.
23:19I like the hair today.
23:21What's it like?
23:21It's sort of on your head and looks really good.
23:25Lovely tip.
23:27And the pen.
23:30Okay.
23:33Write down five things that people do that annoy you.
23:37You have three minutes.
23:38Your time starts now.
23:39There's so many things that annoy me that I can't think of all of a sudden.
23:45Man, you know, I'm a pretty relaxed guy.
23:48Handbrakes.
23:49Yeah.
23:50Yeah.
23:50They annoy me.
23:52Speak loudly in public places.
23:54Vote act.
23:55Just very, very loud.
23:57Me?
23:58No, not you.
23:59You could go up a couple decibels.
24:01Okay.
24:01Great task.
24:03Stop.
24:04Stop them.
24:13I know it's too easy to be true.
24:16Oh no.
24:19Write a protest song for the fifth thing on your list.
24:22Most galvanizing protest song wins.
24:25You have 45 minutes.
24:27You have 45 minutes.
24:28Your time starts now.
24:30Rude.
24:32Staring.
24:34And bad tiramisu.
24:36We will stand too close in a queue.
24:39There's no need.
24:40Easy, easy.
24:41And last is using means as all your jokes.
24:45Any and all forms of bigotry.
24:46You can call me a woke cuck if you want.
24:49But I find bigotry very annoying.
24:51Sneaky, sneaky devils.
24:53I think all I can do is rap because I truly am so worried about singing on television.
24:59What kind of music?
25:00I can play.
25:08Terrible.
25:09I hate it.
25:09I really dislike that song.
25:12Whoever did that did a bad job.
25:15You okay man?
25:19It's just so fire.
25:23I swear to god Paul you're not helping.
25:25Okay sorry.
25:26And I need you to help.
25:27Sorry.
25:31I love a good protest song Paul.
25:33But the thought of writing it and then singing in public on television makes me feel physically ill.
25:41So who should we make do it first?
25:43Our first contestant to clash with the system is the working class heroes, Matawhaeo.
25:54You're looking at me.
25:57You're looking at me.
25:58Stop!
25:59Cease!
26:00Just this!
26:01Your roots tearing.
26:04What you carry.
26:07Mind your business.
26:10Is this a fish?
26:12There's a fish.
26:13Why do you stand?
26:19It's almost as if you really do care.
26:26Does it really hurt that we're wearing these short skirts?
26:35Yeah!
26:37But guys, they're not your property!
26:39So why do you keep staring at me?
26:55The quick note.
26:57No, seriously.
26:58Being possible.
26:59Being possible, sorry.
27:01The music was too powerful.
27:09It was powerful.
27:12You couldn't watch.
27:13I have done this show twice.
27:15I've never been able to not watch a task before.
27:17What was it about that?
27:18It's so vulnerable.
27:21It's so vulnerable.
27:23I think Paul, thank you very much for supporting me on that.
27:25No worries.
27:26You look amazing in a skirt.
27:28Over.
27:28You did refuse to take your trousers off though.
27:30No, I...
27:32I took one pair off.
27:33But I...
27:34I have a few left, ladies.
27:39Okay, I don't want to stare at Rose too long.
27:41Otherwise, I think I'll get told off who's up next.
27:43She doesn't like people standing too close behind her in queues.
27:46It's Morgana O'Reilly.
27:48It's time to talk about the big issue in the world.
27:52Something that really pisses me off.
27:56Oh, when you're lining up in a big old line.
27:59Gotta stay behind.
28:01Gotta get in line.
28:02When I move around, wanna take my time.
28:05Better f*** up when you're standing in line.
28:07A-B-C-D-E-F-G-H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-P.
28:13Q, Q, Q, Q.
28:15Space it out in the Q, Q.
28:18Don't wanna get COVID, don't wanna get nits.
28:21Don't wanna get the plague, don't wanna smell your pits.
28:24I wanna feel roomy, I wanna feel real groovy.
28:27I wanna swing a cat, I wanna take a nap.
28:30Q, Q, Q, Q.
28:32Space it out in the Q.
28:39A couple of questions for you Morgana, why the country song?
28:42I had a whole cute ditty and then somebody pointed out
28:46it was very close to afternoon delight
28:48and then I had to try and change it.
28:51But my, I'm not, I'm no singer,
28:53which I know you wouldn't think to see it,
28:56but I found it hard to pivot in that way.
28:59Great integration of the alphabet.
29:02And some other great lyrics I wrote down here.
29:05Don't wanna get COVID, don't wanna get nits,
29:08don't wanna get the plague, don't wanna smell your piss.
29:12Or your pits.
29:13Or your pits.
29:14Yeah.
29:19They both work.
29:20Well, it's time for a break from all this whinging.
29:22Hopefully the revolution will continue to be televised
29:25when we get back.
29:26We'll see you then.
29:40Welcome back to Taskmaster.
29:41Where five people who get to play games for a living
29:45are complaining about how hard their lives are.
29:48That's right, Jeremy.
29:49Our contestants are performing a protest song about a pet peeve.
29:53So far we've had being stared at
29:56and being stood too close to in a queue.
29:58What societal change will our next contestant have on his agenda?
30:02The answer, my friend, is Hwani and the Wind.
30:07You can't get by in a conversation
30:14Without Wi-Fi, you know what I'm saying
30:20Gotta rise up your eyes from your phone
30:27You're in a room with people acting like you're alone
30:34And don't take those memes and talk them to me
30:40And take away the things you saw online
30:47Think, how can I be a ghoul guy?
30:53Take away, take those memes away
31:00Find something new to say
31:09Beautiful!
31:11Oh, wow!
31:15You've written songs before.
31:17I've made up songs on the spot before.
31:23This is supposed to be, like, quite a funny show.
31:32No, but I was looking at myself being like
31:34Bro, you gotta relax!
31:37It was like I was talking about global warming or something, you know?
31:42But I thought the song was lovely
31:44It was very Ed Sheeran-esque
31:46Yeah
31:47A bit of Dobbin, yeah. Nature's best, mate
31:49Yeah, Tom
31:50Yeah, Dave Dobbin, Ed Sheeran
31:51Just any ginger singer you can sing of
31:56Had a real Mick Hucknell quality
32:01Ron Weasel, such a good singer
32:04Right, who's next?
32:07All I'm asking is for you to give Rhys a chance
32:12This song goes out to literally everyone
32:15And I mean everyone
32:17Alright, man, Paul, you ready?
32:18You know it
32:19Okay, here we go
32:38Harry Potter's good girl
32:39Harry Potter's good girl
32:39Let me change her
32:41Harry Potter's good girl
32:50Let me change her
32:50Sexism, ageism, ableism, and misandry
32:53Got no place in the heart that's brimming with empathy
32:58Ephebophobia, gerontophobia, heterophobia, xenophobia, xenophobia, xenophobia, visuophobia, your time is over
33:03I'll close your eyes as I drove over you in 30 different Range Rovers
33:07And ethnicism, speciesism, and autism, you listening clearly?
33:13You listening clearly?
33:16In bigotry
33:17In bigotry
33:19In bigotry
33:21You really?
33:22I was expecting you to kind of jump in on the verse more
33:25Oh, sorry
33:26I actually just said Harry Potter is good
33:28Yeah, I heard that
33:30Yeah, sorry
33:30No, that's fine
33:31I, I, yeah, sorry
33:38So I think the most processed songs sort of end up with some kind of disagreement at the end
33:43And an argument between the
33:44All the best bands break up
33:47So at one point were you suggesting that you run bigots over with Range Rovers?
33:5230 of them, yeah
33:55I mean that's the problem with the Range Rovers
33:57The suspension's so good you don't know you've hit them
34:04Until you get to number 30
34:07We've got one protest song left, haven't we Paul?
34:10Yes, asking us what's going on
34:12It's Marvin Day v'whane
34:15And how you want to film it?
34:17Probably with the lens cap on
34:21Okay
34:22And everything out of focus
34:23Seems like you don't want people to see your performance
34:27Yeah
34:28Okay
34:29Or maybe, maybe half a lens cap
34:32You know
34:39It's a protest song of tiramisu gone wrong
34:44Bad, bad, naughty gong
34:48Bad, bad, naughty gong
34:51The tiramisu is wrong
34:53When you try as tiramisu gets made
34:56Think
34:58Bad, bad, naughty gong
35:01Bad, naughty gong
35:02Bad, naughty gong
35:04The tiramisu is wrong
35:06When you don't take time to make tiramisu fine
35:10Bad, bad, naughty gong
35:14To ring that gong
35:16The tiramisu is so damn wrong
35:19But when the tiramisu is moist
35:22And the choicest of the choice
35:25No more naughty gong
35:32Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yum
35:44Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy
35:55Tramisu is good
35:57Mmm
36:09Dave, talk us through the bad, bad, naughty gong
36:12With a lot of protest songs
36:14There are too many words
36:16And the way to remember things
36:19One simple phrase
36:21Now it was all about tiramisu
36:22But you wouldn't guess that
36:23You will only remember
36:25Bang, bang, naughty gong
36:29So I sort of failed in that aspect
36:33But
36:35It was about dry tiramisu, wasn't it?
36:37Yeah, which is a crime
36:39Oh, terrible
36:39Yeah, I go to a cafe
36:41And then they bring out the tiramisu
36:43And you dig your spoon in
36:44What is it?
36:46Cream
36:47And only a little bit of custard
36:49So are we sure tiramisu's got custard in it?
36:52Yeah
36:53We think you have the same dessert here
36:55The Italian
36:55Yeah, yeah
36:56You're describing a trifle
36:57No
37:00You know, it's hot in here
37:01The lights say this is red
37:03Oh, so hot
37:05That's funny, I actually bought David a pavlova today
37:08And he was like, this tiramisu's not even close
37:13So how do you want to score it?
37:14Well I was going to score Dave quite high
37:16But I realised he doesn't even know what dessert is to be got
37:19Dave actually needs one point
37:21Okay, yeah
37:21I swapped it round
37:23Fair enough
37:24I'm going to go two points for Rhys
37:26Because I think I prefer bigotry now
37:29I'm going to go three points for Hawane
37:32Because we've got to be very careful in this current environment
37:35Telling people not to look at screen
37:37However you want to watch Taskmaster
37:39Be it on a mobile device
37:40We accept all ways that people watch Taskmaster
37:43And this is coming from a fan of bigotry
37:45And then I was going to go four points for Rose
37:53And then I would go five points for Morgana
37:56I really like the line about the nits
38:02Well, I don't know about you
38:04But I'd like to hear some process songs from people who don't have their own voice
38:07Like multinational corporations
38:09It's time to watch some ads
38:11We'll see you soon
38:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
38:22CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
38:25Welcome back to Taskmaster
38:27It's almost time for the live task
38:29But how are the scores looking, Paul?
38:31Out in first with 16 points
38:32Morgana O'Reilly
38:34CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
38:36Things are heating up
38:39It's time to head to the stage for the final task of the show
38:43APPLAUSE
38:47OK, Paul, who's reading the task tonight?
38:50Rose, please
38:52Don't say the forbidden letter
38:54Each round you will throw a dart at the dart board
38:57And receive a score of one, three, six or a bullseye
39:01You must then recite at least one letter of the alphabet
39:04You may recite any number of letters up to the amount you score on the dart board
39:10If you hit the bullseye, you may recite zero to six letters
39:15The next person must continue from the next letter of the alphabet
39:19Whoever says the forbidden letter will be eliminated
39:22Last remaining contestant wins
39:24Morgana
39:26The forbidden letter
39:28Z
39:28Z
39:31A
39:36Sorry, could you not cue so close to us?
39:41B, C, D
39:44E
39:47Doesn't have to use all three
39:50F, G, H
39:53First person to not get applause, OK
39:57I, J, K
40:01Wait
40:05L
40:07M
40:08N
40:10O
40:10P
40:12Oh, you sacks of shit
40:17Q, R, S
40:19T, U, V
40:21W, X, Y
40:24Oh
40:25He needs a bullseye
40:34For this round, the forbidden letter will be W
40:37A
40:39B
40:41C, D, E
40:43F, D, H
40:46I
40:47J, K
40:49L
40:51M, N, O
40:53P, Q, R
40:56It's a six
40:57Oh
40:57S, T, U, V
41:00W, X
41:04I f***ed up
41:05I f***ed up
41:08How did I f***ed up?
41:09You said W
41:10Oh, I forgot it was a Z
41:14Sorry
41:18I hate this for you
41:19This round, the forbidden letter is T
41:23A, B, C
41:25E, F, G
41:26D, E, F
41:27D, E, F
41:28Yes
41:29Oh, what? Are we allowed to just do that then?
41:37Bullbacks
41:37G
41:39Six
41:40H
41:42Oh
41:45I, J, K
41:48L, M, N
41:49Six
41:50O, P, Q, R, S
41:57Okay
41:58He needs a bullseye
42:02T
42:05It's the final, the forbidden letter is Q
42:10Three
42:11A, B, C
42:14Oh
42:15First bullseye
42:16D, E, F, G, H, I
42:20Oh
42:23J, K, L, M, N, O
42:29Six
42:30P
42:34She needs the bullseye to skip
42:38Oh
42:40Oh
42:40J
42:45Don't you cheer for me now
42:48You weren't there at the start
42:51I got here on my own
42:52If I don't need you
42:53Come on down in the water, we'll score it
42:56Come on down
42:57Thank you
43:02So one point for Dave
43:04Two points for Rose
43:05Three points for Huani
43:06Four points for Morgana
43:07And five points for Rhys Mathewson
43:11Time to get our ducks in a row
43:14Who has won episode six of Taskmaster season seven?
43:19The winner of episode six with 20 points is Morgana O'Reilly
43:24Congratulations Morgana
43:26Please head up to the stage
43:28To collect your beautiful barbed belongings
43:36It's time to reflect on what we've learnt tonight
43:38We've learnt that whether you wave or jiggle a red flag
43:42You shouldn't do it in front of sheep
43:44And you came in like a blister
43:46Your salami's out
43:48Your milktop looks terrible
43:49Bad, bad, naughty gong
43:54But most importantly
43:55We've learnt that the winner of episode six
43:57Is Morgana O'Reilly
44:00We're forward to seeing you next time
44:02Nā te wa
44:23I mean, this is gonna be a shit show
44:26That was the scooter
44:27Go back, go!
44:30Stupid game
44:31I love this game
44:32It's not a game, it's a task
44:33Shut the heck up
44:34You're a little shit
44:35And then I knew it's not the job for me