00:00Well, hi there, my fellow conwassers of cinematic trash, and welcome back to the trailer park.
00:06Today, we're deep diving in the late 60s bargain basement to look at a piece of shit called Latitude Zero.
00:19The special effects are, um, special.
00:22And the acting, if you could call it that, is worse.
00:26Grab a beer and maybe something a little stronger to smoke and join me as we dive under the ocean
00:31in a kiddie's toy into this very un-cinematic trailer.
00:37An experiment beneath the sea to challenge the unknown.
00:42Looks like someone dropped a Mentos into a Diet Coke and filmed it in a bathtub.
00:47Here come our heroes in their gold lame pajamas.
00:51Are they saving the world, or auditioning for a disco-themed production of West Side Story?
00:58Latitude Zero.
01:00More like Budget Zero.
01:02Look at this submarine.
01:03It's got more fins than a 1950s Cadillac and less structural integrity than my last relationship.
01:10The Alpha launched June 21st, 1805.
01:16This man is 204 years old.
01:19Clearly, the secret to eternal life is a silk neckerchief and an absolute refusal to hire a decent tailor.
01:31Enter Cesar Romero.
01:33He looks like he wandered off the set of Batman and is still trying to figure out why he's not
01:38the Joker anymore.
01:39Oh no, a missile.
01:41It's basically a spray-painted cigar.
01:44I've seen more threatening objects in a cat's mouth.
01:47Those are torpedoes.
01:49They're missiles.
01:51Well, do something, will you?
01:57Jesus Christ, Doc.
01:59I hope you guys were paid well by Toho to appear in this dime store, crap.
02:07At Latitude Zero, good battles evil.
02:10Using the incredible weapons of tomorrow.
02:16Activate your animation belt.
02:25I've seen pictures of the moon that looked a lot more inviting.
02:28Right.
02:29Say, Captain, you ever been here before?
02:31First time.
02:32That's great.
02:33How do we find Dr. O'Connor?
02:34We'll have to search.
02:36Even the actors know they're in a hellscape.
02:38Cesar Romero is literally laughing at his own movie.
02:42That's the face of a man who just realized his check cleared.
02:46A giant Batman?
02:48This is the most expensive fursuit I've ever seen.
02:51Is this a movie or a very specific fetish convention?
02:56And as you can see, they spared no expense for these amazing bat costumes.
03:02Avatar, beware.
03:10Man's future explodes.
03:13Yeah, it explodes into a pile of tax-deductible rubble.
03:17Latitude Zero.
03:18In color.
03:20Because seeing this mess in black and white
03:22just wouldn't do justice to how ugly those costumes really are.
03:26That's all we've got time or tolerance for today, folks.
03:31Merry Christmas and please subscribe.
03:35The trailer park forever wild
03:39Camp and gore deliciously vile
03:43Laughs and screams we've just begun
03:46Watch the chaos we've only won
03:54Creepy laps and mutant bees
03:57Blood and slime and oddity
04:01From corpse to creature
04:03Nothing's wrong
04:05We watch, we roast, we sing along
04:08within a small picture
04:08habits is nghĩa
04:08You're
04:08still not Now that
04:09do small You're
04:09not
04:09No
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