00:00My name is Dylan Mulvaney, and the president of the United States said my name in his speech
00:04four times on Friday night. It wasn't her on the Bud Light can. It was Dylan Mulvaney.
00:12Mind you, I've been kind of flying under the radar, keeping up a pretty low profile,
00:17just like doing my little musicals, singing, dancing. And yet I am still his topic of
00:21conversation all these years later. And it seems to me that I might be like the one that got away
00:26for these men. Like I am permanently burned into their retinas. I am microchipped into their minds.
00:31I want to personally congratulate CNN's Caitlin Callens on receiving her award. It was all about
00:40me. It's a fake. She shouldn't get the award. It was a fake, but I didn't mind. I said, Caitlin,
00:45congratulations. But it was fake. There's no question about it. But she's a young, attractive
00:51woman. She never smiles. I said, Caitlin, do you ever smile? Smile. You have a nice position.
00:57You're at CNN fake news. You should be a happy person. So smile, Caitlin. Just smile. But
01:04we attack. And I thought Caitlin had really made it big with a major new sponsorship. But then I
01:12informed her that it wasn't her on the Bud Light can. It was Dylan Mulvaney. And Dylan Mulvaney cost
01:21Bud Light $35 billion in market cap. That was the worst commercial ever made, by the way, for those
01:30few people that want to hear that. Most people don't care, but I would. I wouldn't want to hire
01:34Dylan anytime soon. Think of it. They hired Dylan Mulvaney and their market cap has gone down by
01:40$35 billion. Who wrote that commercial?
01:44Hi. Impressive carrying skills, right? I got some Bud Lights for us. So I kept hearing about this
01:51thing called March Madness. And I thought we were all just having a hectic month. But it turns out it
01:56has something to do with sports. Firstly, I would like to congratulate CNN's Caitlin Collins on her award
02:02and tell her that I'm incredibly honored to be compared to her in any way. Why is it so important
02:08to
02:08them that I don't find success? Like, what is it that I have that they don't? Oh my God, freedom.
02:16I am free in a way that they will never have the privilege to experience. And they want to use
02:21their power to take away my freedom. But what they don't understand is that my freedom has like zero
02:26contingency on what they can provide for me. Because my freedom is fully dependent on the moment that I
02:33acknowledged my real authentic self in every day since.
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