00:00face right over the years we've followed danielle westbrook as she's lived the highs and lows of
00:08growing up in the spot i'd take a look being left with nothing from my marriage and moving my kids
00:12into a bedstick this year was really difficult being a job at least you do bring a lot of stuff
00:16on yourself because you've always had a relationship with drugs before you've got a relationship with
00:19anything else for me personally i've made a lot of mistakes i put my hands up and said you know
00:23what i did that i realized because i wanted to i had all my top teeth out and implants put
00:28in on
00:28screws it started to swell that we're getting set to seeing a whole lot of it just spelt me into
00:33a
00:33depression coming out of big brother should have been my busiest year when you relapse and you take
00:36drugs you don't see that yeah all you see is selfishness and a way out yes i'm happy i'm doing
00:41some bits and you know um i've got some very good friends around me i can't complain the british public
00:46are great with me you're so honest i'm too honest sometimes i think that's my problem but yeah
00:52oh that's so lovely well now danielle is about to write a new memoir in which she says she's
00:57determined to make her 50s happier than ever and she joins us now it's so good to see it
01:03it's really good when you fell over when it said you're nearly 50. i know we shouldn't even go
01:07next year no i'm looking forward to it i'd like to be 50 this year really yeah i'm happy to
01:14be alive
01:15it's like after everything i've put myself through i'm just so excited to hit 50 and waiting to be a
01:20nanny hopefully kids get going on at least you know you know they're not expecting it at the
01:25moment already no no they're not i'm just rushing it they're all career-minded and you know driven so
01:30that's great but i'm driving shut up mama get into my own you know i'm just so i'm i'm just
01:40so happy
01:41with this chapter that i'm in and i think i needed to um i just needed to get there myself
01:45and it's all the
01:46recovery stuff's great but it was just learning how to like me a little bit yeah and how have you
01:51done that because obviously you've been through so much you're on the other side now how have you
01:55got our way through lots of stuff still um i think putting the drugs down really is one of the
02:00easiest
02:01parts but it's putting the ego down that really is the hard bit yeah the ego is what kills you
02:06you
02:06know it keeps you out of the rooms and it makes you relax and it keeps you in the room
02:09but um
02:10yeah it's a really hard balance but for me i found a fantastic therapist
02:14um a woman with 28 years under her belt from north london been through so much like me wasn't a
02:20crop watcher and just said to me you need to deal with this this this this and this and own
02:24your crap
02:24and i was like no she was like no you need to or you're not gonna have anyone or anything
02:29or you're not gonna have much of the future and um she just slowly started to pick away and work
02:34with me i did a lot of inner child work did a lot of spiritual therapy so that inner child
02:38work i
02:39always wanted to know what it is what is it you go back to when you were like eight years
02:42old and you
02:43work out where yeah yeah well for me yeah that eight nine years old like coming into the studio here
02:47today the building that you're in it's hard work for me to come to this building because you've grown
02:51up here as a child in the industry okay so i find that i find that quite traumatic but it's
02:55another
02:55milestone i've passed i've come to a happy show it's a new time new memories i've worked for all that
02:59stuff it's behind me and you know you don't know when i'm in a car looking in the rearview mirror
03:04you can check it every now and again to check yourself and keep going forward and that's
03:07pretty much life isn't it well um what do you think is there obviously wasn't one moment where
03:13you woke up and went okay i need to change my life so is it just i could have said
03:16that every day
03:17and i'll just be like right so is it just chipping away slow process therapy and meetings as well
03:23i've got loads of meetings so i have to well yeah i'm a sponsor and i work a 12-step
03:26program
03:26yeah you know i work every day on the grass list i do my resentments at the end of the
03:30day i check in
03:31on the surface do you know it's funny i've got mates in 12 steps and what you can learn from
03:36them
03:36you know i'm very lucky i'm blessed i'm not blessed with addictive i'm blessed with an addictive
03:39personality but what i love i learned so much from my mates in 12 steps like that like you know
03:45the the
03:46the sort of sense of gratitude and you know um and knowing that it's all and like you said it
03:52just sort of goes back to ego doesn't it checking yourself in this industry as you see as we know
03:56and playing is the most addictive thing of any rock yeah and he goes secondly that's why i look at
04:00these
04:01reality shows i just think oh god you know people don't realize if they've got any of the isms they
04:04really are screwed but you know i look at it and i think that's such a big message to get
04:10across to
04:10people that i have so many people message me and ask how can i get well how can i do
04:14stuff i'm like
04:15do you know what i just said whatever you're in let me get your meeting list i'll bring the secretary
04:19at that meeting and say can you get somebody to help this person just connect that's being a service
04:22yeah you know and it's like so many people think about going to the rehabilitation you don't need
04:27to go to rehab all they're going to do is detox you you need to get yourself to a meeting
04:31it's free
04:32you know it's there and you're not going to be not going to say anything in that room that's not
04:35going to upset anyone rather than the band that gets it from the source you know unfortunately the
04:42NHS system hasn't got a huge amount of resources for rehabilitation or depression but there's
04:48meetings for that and then they're free go and do it and you'll get well just by being around other
04:52people what's amazing is so many people now with issues are coming to you on instagram social media
04:58coming to you for help i mean can you keep up with it when i relapsed a few years back
05:03i couldn't speak
05:03to anybody because i was being a fraud i thought i can't talk to people because i'm being a fraud
05:06and i'm
05:07like you know what no um i can i deal with it now i deal with it because i'm okay
05:11but i have to say
05:12to me i'm not a therapist i can only point you in the direction of that and then you know
05:16you need
05:17to do it yourself so you don't want to put your strain on your shoulders either i'm a real empath
05:21so i take other people's stuff on board and i have to just kind of like that that's why my
05:25agent
05:25never runs my social media pretty much you just want to see it do you sponsor people as well i
05:29don't
05:29sponsor people at the moment but i do a lot of live talks and stuff with the people and i
05:33do shares and
05:33things and so and i do a lot of stand-up speaking as well about you know all this sort
05:38of stuff and
05:39trauma people who are getting into the industry in whatever way whether it's music or acting or
05:45showbiz or like they probably learn a lot what would you what would be the big take-home if you
05:51think
05:52you're doing a lot of life coaching uh workshop and holistic workshops and stuff and i'm just getting
05:57people into just learning about their self and listening to their gut instincts you know staying
06:02true to themselves staying around your own brain group stay wholesome don't get carried away and i
06:05think we could all i know it sounds a bit americanized but we're all doing a bit of therapy now
06:08again
06:09it's just so much chicken with yeah and that's what brought up the story
