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00:04Let's meet today's threes-a-crowd trios!
00:07We've got Deborah Pearl, a greeting card store owner.
00:10She's here with her boyfriend, Joe, and her ex-boyfriend, Brad.
00:14Lisa Wheeler, a high school science teacher.
00:17She's here with her boyfriend, John, and her ex-boyfriend, John John.
00:21And finally, Melissa Lanzorakis, a student.
00:24She's here with her boyfriend, David, and her ex-boyfriend, Ryan.
00:28Today, we'll find out who knows who better
00:31on all new threes-a-crowd!
00:52Here he is, the master of disguise, Alan Ficht!
01:05Hello, this is threes-a-crowd, and we're gonna take three people.
01:09We add two of the most important folks in their lives,
01:11and we see who knows them better.
01:12Today, we pit boyfriends against ex-boyfriends.
01:15Remember, guys, no scratching, no hair-pulling.
01:19Stars of the show today are Deborah, Lisa, and Melissa.
01:23They're gonna stay seated.
01:24The boyfriends and ex-boyfriends, they go to the soundproof booth,
01:27and they'll hear none of what we're about to say.
01:30While they're relocating, let me remind everyone how we play.
01:33I'm gonna ask these ladies a few personal questions,
01:35and when our contestants return, we'll see how well they can match answers
01:38to win $1,000.
01:39Our first question, are we ready, Deborah?
01:42Yes.
01:43Oh.
01:44Don't frighten me now.
01:46Okay.
01:46All right.
01:47What do you think your ex-boyfriend did better than your current boyfriend?
01:51Money.
01:52Money.
01:52The ex was better at the money?
01:53Making money.
01:54Mm-hmm.
01:55Lisa?
01:56What did the ex do better than the current boyfriend?
01:59That's a tough one, but I have to say that the ex was less selfish.
02:05Can I say that?
02:06I mean, he just wasn't so focused.
02:08You can say anything to me.
02:08It's the other guy you gotta reckon.
02:10He wasn't so focused on himself all the time.
02:13Uh-huh.
02:13I love this one, but he's really, it's all about him.
02:16Yeah.
02:19Melissa?
02:20I would definitely say that Ryan, my ex, is much better at going to the gym
02:24and lifting weights.
02:25He's got a great bod, but my current boyfriend has not a bod at all.
02:29He's a skinny little scarecrow.
02:31But, yeah, Ryan has definitely gotta go to the gym.
02:34So what is it so appealing about the current one?
02:36It must be some spiritual thing.
02:38He's got a good sense of humor.
02:40Yeah.
02:40Good personality.
02:43Well, we hope that works for him.
02:47Deborah, what's the most macho thing you do?
02:52Oh.
02:53I, I, I, I box.
02:55I kick box.
02:56Wow, that is.
02:57Yeah.
02:58Okay.
03:01Lisa?
03:01The most macho thing you do?
03:03The most macho thing I do.
03:05I'm very competitive.
03:07Um, volleyball, I guess.
03:10Maybe that I'm just very athletic.
03:12Melissa, what's the most macho thing you do?
03:14I burp and fart.
03:17Yeah, baby!
03:19Yeah!
03:22Alright.
03:23Now, do you do this simultaneously, Melissa?
03:26I, like, I fart all the time.
03:29Oh, congratulations.
03:30I know.
03:31And my boyfriend would be like, did you let one?
03:33Last night in the store, I let the biggest fart, like, loud.
03:36And these two ladies were like, oh my god, just like, looking around.
03:39I don't know who did it.
03:40But, yeah, that's the most macho thing I do, fart and burp.
03:43Oh, I think we all feel better knowing that now.
03:47Thank you for, thank you for sharing.
03:51Well, we'll be right back with the boyfriends and the ex-boyfriends.
03:59Is that here yet?
04:00Can't wait till the holidays?
04:02Want to make cookies?
04:03Yeah!
04:05Start celebrating now.
04:07Is that him?
04:09Not yet.
04:10Pillsbury sugar and new gingerbread cookies.
04:13Fun cookies you create and decorate together.
04:16Because it's the little moments that make the holidays.
04:20Ho, ho, ho!
04:23Oh, Merry Christmas!
04:27This is Unisom Sleep Gels.
04:30It helps you sleep.
04:31This is Tylenol PM.
04:33It helps you sleep, too.
04:34They both have the exact same amount of the exact same sleep ingredient.
04:39But Tylenol PM has added medicine for headaches, backaches, even fever.
04:44Do you have a headache?
04:46Uh-uh.
04:46Backache?
04:46Uh-uh.
04:47Fever?
04:47Uh-uh.
04:48Then why take medicine for it?
04:50Take Unisom.
04:51It's a safe, non-habit forming way to fall fast asleep.
04:57I'm here to see if an expert can taste the difference between butter and new parquet.
05:02You, sir, are from?
05:04Oregon.
05:04I would have thought Idaho.
05:06I get that a lot.
05:07Well, let's just do it.
05:09Mmm.
05:10Very creamy, rich.
05:12It's butter.
05:13Parquet.
05:14It tastes like butter.
05:16Parquet.
05:16I-I-I-I don't like pepper.
05:18Yeah, but I do.
05:20Whoa, whoa, whoa.
05:20Easy.
05:21Hey, whoa.
05:21The richest, creamiest parquet ever.
05:24Nothing says...
05:24Butter.
05:25...like new parquet.
05:27With New Palmolive Spring Sensation.
05:29Spring is in the air.
05:32Everywhere I look around.
05:33Botanical blends.
05:34So fresh.
05:35It's springtime every time you do dishes.
05:38New Palmolive Spring Sensation.
05:40Spring is in the air.
05:42My business runs on long hours and Aleve.
05:46I can't settle for those pain relievers that quit too soon.
05:49Just two Aleve are strong enough to work all day.
05:51I used to need A-tylenol to do that.
05:53There's a tool for every job.
05:55For tough pain, it's Aleve.
05:57Out here, I'm in command.
05:59So am I supposed to say, slow down, guys, I'm constipated?
06:03I don't think so.
06:06You try to eat, right?
06:07Sometimes you can't.
06:08Harsh chemical laxatives, they can kick in whenever and wherever.
06:12Not an option.
06:13So I rely on doctor-recommended Metamucil.
06:16It's got 100% natural fiber.
06:18Works with my body.
06:19Gently.
06:20Which is important to a sensitive guy like myself.
06:24Metamucil, the doctor's natural choice for regularity.
06:27Ah, Vegas.
06:28Cheap drinks, cheap thrills, and the smell of cheap perfume.
06:31Oh, and my show, Bert Lund's Love Buffet.
06:33Weeknights at 10 p.m. on Game Show Network.
06:35I think there was a pattern there somewhere.
06:38And now, back to all new threes across, and our host, Alan Dickson.
06:46Before the break, we asked Deborah, Lisa, Melissa to share some personal information.
06:50Now we're going to find out just how well the boyfriends and ex-boyfriends know these women.
06:54With every match, they earn five points.
06:56Most points at the end of the game wins $1,000.
06:58Here we go, Joe.
06:59Hello, Alan.
07:00Are you ready?
07:00Yes, sir.
07:01Okay, good to see you.
07:02We asked Deborah what she thought her ex-boyfriend did better than you.
07:08What do you think she said?
07:10Oh, boy.
07:11Well, since he's on the more sensitive side, and I'm a little more rugged, I'd have to say he's best
07:16at cooking.
07:18Cooking!
07:20Better cook, huh?
07:21Just the right touch, you know?
07:22Just the right spice.
07:24I don't know.
07:24That's important.
07:25Brad?
07:26I would have to say that I think I do a better job than Joe at making money.
07:35I've got enough.
07:36I've got enough.
07:37And what about you, Deborah?
07:39You told us...
07:40I told you.
07:40Making money.
07:42Oh!
07:43What the fuck?
07:45All right, Rothenberg.
07:47All right, if Brad gets a match, you may make more money tonight, Brad.
07:50John?
07:51I would say that because, you know, he's a kinder, gentler person, he's going to clean better than I do.
07:59Oh.
08:01Better cleaner.
08:03And John John?
08:04I've never cleaned anything in my life.
08:08It may be something, but I would say, I know it's not listener, it's probably athlete.
08:17Better athlete.
08:18Oh, dream!
08:20Yeah, definitely.
08:20All right, and Lisa says?
08:23You are less selfish than him.
08:26Oh, selfish.
08:27David?
08:28Well, I'm going to have to say that I like to go to the gym sometimes, but I'm not that
08:32dedicated.
08:32And he's more dedicated than I am, so I'm going to have to say that staying healthy or getting in
08:38shape.
08:39Ryan's conditioning.
08:41Ryan, what would you say?
08:42I'd have to agree with David because...
08:45I mean...
08:47I mean, look at the...
08:49Look at those little puny arms.
08:51Look at this...
08:51What?
08:52She wants a beefy...
08:53She wants a guy that's got something to grab, you know?
08:55Why is she with me now?
08:56Look at this...
08:57You know?
08:59Well, Ryan, Ryan, you would agree, though.
09:01You would say better conditioning, right?
09:03Yes.
09:04Okay, and Melissa?
09:05Well, Alan, I said going to the gym.
09:08You did say going to the gym.
09:09All right.
09:10Yeah, a couple matches there.
09:13Oh, yeah.
09:14Good, good.
09:15We have a few people on the board.
09:16Let's try this one.
09:16Brad, what did Debra say is the most macho thing she does?
09:21Oh, she does her housework in a very macho way.
09:25She does it nude.
09:27She does it nude?
09:28No, I've never seen anything like it.
09:30I don't know what goes on now, but that used to be the case.
09:33She used to, yeah.
09:34Yeah, well, uh...
09:34She used to put clothes on.
09:36And you left, Brad?
09:38Well, there was more to the story.
09:40I see.
09:41The best part of our relationship is that nude thing, yeah.
09:43Mm-hmm.
09:43Love it when she's nude.
09:44But I would have to say to that same question, working out.
09:48Oh, she loves to work out.
09:49Hit the bag, just the testosterone in her.
09:53Mm-hmm.
09:54Without any chemicals, no steroids whatsoever.
09:55Okay.
09:56She's just massive.
09:57Let's see what Debra told us.
10:00Kickboxing.
10:01Well, they said hit the bag.
10:02I think that's...
10:02Yeah!
10:03Yeah.
10:03Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
10:06Woo!
10:07Yeah.
10:08Hit the bag with your foot, and you get a match.
10:12Groceries.
10:13John-John.
10:14Let's try you now.
10:15We have a John-John and a John.
10:16Yeah.
10:17The John-John is the X.
10:18Yes.
10:18You've cut down on your Johns, Lisa.
10:21Obviously.
10:21Two thirds.
10:22Just one John, too many.
10:24All right.
10:24Still true.
10:26Uh, what, uh, what does Lisa say is the most macho thing she does?
10:32Jeez, it would have to be peeing.
10:35We were sitting in the middle of a jacuzzi, and this girl announces to the entire...
10:40I gotta go pee!
10:41Boom!
10:42Boom!
10:42She's off on the side in a bush just wherever, whenever she has to immediately.
10:47Ah!
10:51Now, we...
10:52She doesn't necessarily stand up.
10:53You're not saying she's not macho.
10:55Alan, it's so macho.
10:57It happens however it happens.
10:59I'm sorry.
11:00It's like artistic.
11:01I'm sorry I asked.
11:02I didn't mean to pursue that line of questioning.
11:04It's okay.
11:05I'm going there with him.
11:06But we'll take your answer.
11:07And, uh, John, what do you think?
11:09Um, well, knowing Lisa and how she likes to go outdoors and do stuff, I'm going to say...
11:13Yeah, we just heard that story.
11:16Oh, I'm not going to go crazy.
11:17She likes to go hiking.
11:19She hikes phenomenally.
11:20She loves to do that.
11:21I'm going to say hiking.
11:22Hiking.
11:22And Lisa says...
11:23Oh, I blew it.
11:23I said competitive.
11:25But I'm...
11:26It's competitiveness.
11:27What?
11:28Come on now.
11:29Ryan, what do you think?
11:31Farting.
11:31What macho thing Melissa does?
11:33Farting.
11:35She farts larger than any guy I've ever met.
11:37All right.
11:39When we were going out, like the first week she told me that she was in the supermarket
11:45and she was by herself.
11:47There's two ladies down the aisle and she farted and she tried to play it off but there's no
11:52one else there.
11:53And they're all laughing at her so she just...
11:55Blame it on the turnip whenever you're a duck.
12:00Well, that's charming.
12:01David.
12:01I'm going to have...
12:02Okay.
12:02She can eat more than a sumo wrestler, man.
12:05I'm telling you.
12:06She eats so much.
12:08I'm going to have to go with she can eat more than a man.
12:10Well, that explains that, doesn't it, Ryan?
12:15Melissa told us...
12:16I said burping and farting.
12:18Passing gas.
12:20Woo!
12:21Yeah.
12:24Yes.
12:24And that happy couple, Ryan, is in the lead with ten.
12:29When we come back, the ladies go off stage.
12:32The boyfriends and ex-boyfriends will come out and talk to us.
12:35Okay.
12:35We'll be right here.
12:45The race is on.
12:46Go!
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12:52In the Letterboxd Dolby Digital presentation of The Mummy.
12:56There's something out there.
12:57There's something underneath that sand.
12:58These fortune hunters get more than they bargained for.
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13:02And you will, too.
13:03Run!
13:03This just keeps getting better and better.
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13:07In the Letterboxd Dolby Digital presentation...
13:09Oh, I dreamt about this since I was a little girl.
13:12...of The Mummy, playing on DirecTV.
13:19Sweetie, that must be the Martins. Can you get it?
13:21Got it, honey!
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14:45Ah, Vegas.
14:46Cheap drinks.
14:47Cheap thrills.
14:48And the smell of cheap perfume.
14:49Oh, and my show.
14:50Burt Lund's Love Buffet.
14:51Weeknights at 10pm on Game Show Network.
14:53I think there was a pattern there somewhere.
14:56And now, back to all new Three's A Crowd.
14:59With your host, Alan Vick.
15:03All right, we have Deborah, Lisa, Melissa.
15:05They're backstage.
15:06The boyfriends and ex-boyfriends are right here with us.
15:09They're gonna guess what the ladies will say.
15:10We're gonna start with our second trio.
15:12That's Lisa's group in the middle.
15:13There you go.
15:15And, John, let me ask you this.
15:16What will Lisa say makes her jealous when she looks at other women?
15:20Well, if she's looking at other women,
15:22the only thing that's gonna make her jealous is their stomachs.
15:24Because she's great everywhere else, but she's a little worried about her stomach.
15:28Okay.
15:28John John says...
15:31Lisa has a thing about lips.
15:34I mean, she loves her own, but when she sees fuller lips in hers, she's like...
15:38And she used to always, like, I'd look at someone, she'd be like,
15:41What is it about that girl?
15:42And, you know, I mean, she'd zero in on lips every time.
15:45Always a lips.
15:46Always.
15:47David.
15:47I'm gonna have to say height.
15:49She, uh...
15:50Every girl that passes by her that's taller than she,
15:52she goes on for hours about how tall this girl is and how she wishes she was taller.
15:57Seems overkill, doesn't it, David?
15:58Yeah.
15:59Okay, height.
16:00Jealous of somebody's height.
16:02Ryan?
16:02I'd have to say, uh, probably waist size.
16:05Joe.
16:07Hi.
16:07Well, let's see.
16:08Um, she prides herself on these, and so some woman had bigger boobs than she did.
16:17No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
16:18That does not happen with Deborah.
16:20She, uh, she thinks she's got her well endowed.
16:22So, any woman who has bigger boobs, she doesn't like that.
16:25So, okay.
16:26Yeah.
16:26Brad?
16:26Debra used to be a hairdresser, and she, the first thing she looks at is other women's hair,
16:31and it drives her crazy if there's something about her hair that's better than hers.
16:35Okay.
16:36Jealous of hair.
16:36Right.
16:37Good cross-section of answers we got from this group.
16:39Let's go on to this one.
16:41Start with you, Jon Jon.
16:41What will Lisa say she does more often?
16:44Does she talk about sex, or talk during sex?
16:51She definitely, definitely talks about sex.
16:54Uh, what will, uh, Jon tell us?
16:56Um, I'm gonna go with talking with, talking about it, because, well, she's a little busy
17:00while she's doing it, so.
17:04Okay.
17:05Ryan.
17:06Well, Alan.
17:07Tell us about Melissa.
17:08You know, I'm, I'm a religious guy, and I go to, go to church every week, so I'd have
17:13to say talking about sex.
17:15Good.
17:15Because I'm waiting until I get married.
17:17There you go.
17:18That's, uh, stick to it, Ryan.
17:22David.
17:23Uh, talking about it.
17:24Talking about it.
17:25She's got movies on it.
17:26And, uh, videos.
17:28Audio.
17:29She likes to talk about it a lot.
17:32Brett.
17:33Debra has a secret fantasy.
17:35I'm, I'm gonna have to say that she talks more about it, because she secretly wants to
17:40be a porno queen.
17:46She likes to act out different scenes ahead of time.
17:51The, the memory seems to bring a smile to your face.
17:56You know, you know, she didn't tell me about that part of it, but, uh, I guess that, that's
17:59the special between them.
18:00Anyways.
18:00Um, no, she definitely talks, um, about it.
18:03Uh, she's a strong silent type in bed, you know.
18:06Okay.
18:06Knows, knows what she has to do and gets it done.
18:09Talks about it.
18:10There you go.
18:12Well, it's quite a group we have here.
18:13When we come back, we're gonna see how well these contestants have done.
18:26All right, kids, it's time for a pop quiz.
18:30And, guess what?
18:32No cheating this time.
18:38All right, now swap your papers with your neighbors.
18:41Match Game PM tonight at 1am Eastern, 10pm Pacific only on Game Show Network.
18:48You can measure it a million ways.
18:54In mouthfuls or by the spoon.
18:58In a sudden silence.
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19:05So, how much do they love Quaker Oatmeal?
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20:24Okay, and the ladies are back.
20:25The boyfriends and ex-boyfriends have made their best guesses.
20:28A thousand dollars is what we're playing for.
20:30We'll begin with Lisa's group.
20:32When you look at other women, what usually makes you jealous of them?
20:35I think that I always think I'm fat, so I would have to say that they're thin.
20:40Probably that they have a flatter tummy than I do.
20:44Let's see what John said.
20:47Stomach!
20:47Stomach!
20:53John John, from the old days.
20:57Their lips.
20:59Their lips!
21:01You always used to go off about Gina Gershon.
21:05That was long ago, John John.
21:08Things are different now.
21:10Melissa.
21:11Thanks for the history, Lisa.
21:11I would have to agree with Lisa and say I always look at skinnier girls and I'm jealous.
21:17Okay.
21:18Skinny girls.
21:19David?
21:20I said their height.
21:22Uh-huh.
21:22You always complain about-
21:24You wish you were taller.
21:25You always say that.
21:26Yeah.
21:27Ryan?
21:30Ryan?
21:31I'd have to say the waist size.
21:33Waist size.
21:33There you go.
21:36Some things never change.
21:39Deborah?
21:40Yeah, I would have to say their height because my current boyfriend's always like towering
21:46over me and I'm like, well I can't change it.
21:49You know?
21:49So I would have to go with the height because that pisses me off really well.
21:54Current boyfriend, by the way, is Joe.
21:56He's got a name tag just in case-
21:58Yes, thanks.
21:58Well, it depends if he gets it right.
22:00Oh.
22:02I see.
22:03All depended on that thousand dollars, Joe.
22:06What about the money?
22:07What do you have to say?
22:09Boobs.
22:12Honey, honey, before you go crazy-
22:15Oh, yeah.
22:16Just like out in the hall, you seem to know this woman with-
22:19Bigger boobs.
22:25Bigger boobs.
22:26Bigger boobs.
22:26So big.
22:26I get excited when someone has bigger boobs than me.
22:29It doesn't mean it's better.
22:34Hello.
22:35All right, welcome back to twos-a-crown.
22:46Thanks, Brad.
22:47I appreciate you appreciating that.
22:48Uh, what did you have to say?
22:50I had to say their hair.
22:52Aw.
22:53Aw.
22:54Because you used to do hair.
22:55yeah and Lisa will ask you what do you do more often do you talk about sex or do
23:01you talk during sex oh I talk about sex definitely because I don't talk too much
23:08during sex and I like to have a lot of sex I guess I talk about it a lot John
23:14John it's about time talk about John talk about sex Melissa talk during sex talk during yeah I just am
23:33bored
23:38David are you gonna put up I said she talked about sex must have been somebody else that said talk
23:48about sex all right let's check on Debra's group now do you more often talk about sex or talk during
23:55sex well actually I got a whole book on what to do during sex about this big so I definitely
24:01talk
24:01during sex Brad I said you talk about sex because you have a one-track mind Joe um ditto talk
24:15about
24:15sex darling darling darling what were we thinking we're so in the mood and so passionately involved
24:24how are we even thinking about what to say to each other we talk during sex all the time are
24:30you
24:30kidding me those are grunts those are grunts it's not speech it's not talking it sounds
24:37he's with someone else I don't know it's not me
24:42well I'm sure somebody on this panel is telling the truth
24:47right now the score we have a couple 20s that'll change we have the fast match round coming up
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25:27fix it in with ProGuard start cleaner stay cleaner they've taken our shirts our razors
25:35they've even taken our underwear we don't wear their undies well sometimes but you know just for fun
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25:45new whitewater from Old Spice it's fresh no fresher than that that's it sharing's fine but with
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26:01don't touch no no no no hold it my family touches everything so to fight bacteria I switched from
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26:44okay john and ryan each have 20 points it's still anybody's game for a thousand each contestant will
26:49now have to instantly decide how deborah lisa and melissa are going to respond to a series of
26:54four words or phrases they can answer by saying daydream nightmare or big yawn every match is worth
27:0110 points we start with deborah's group here we are computer guys fellas and deborah nightmare nightmare
27:10is a match with brad guys who work out every day fellas deborah daydream daydream another match with
27:19brad guys with beards fellas say deborah daydream daydream no match guys who like karaoke joe and brad
27:31and deborah daydream daydream is another match with brad nicely done here we go melissa's group guys who
27:37scream in bed to the men um now melissa daydream daydream is a match with both of them older guys
27:45fellas
27:46say and melissa big yawn big yawn is a match with ryan guys who read horoscopes david and ryan
27:57melissa big yawn big yawn is no match at all we go to this one guys who can square dance
28:05fellas say and melissa daydream daydream is a match with both of them good
28:12lisa's group daydream nightmare big yawn are your choices guys who read dirty magazines the fellas say
28:22lisa nightmare nightmare nightmare is no match cops john and john john john john john john
28:30lisa lisa lisa lisa lisa lisa lisa lisa daydream daydream is a match with john john
28:46younger guys the fellas say and lisa daydream daydream catches it with both of them
28:54there you go take a look at our scoreboard now we see a flashing 50 down at the end ryan
29:05doesn't mind being the x anymore
29:09turns out he knew melissa just fine good memory there ryan you're a champion today thanks to
29:15debra lisa melissa of course to all the boyfriends and ex-boyfriends to you for watching we'll see you
29:20next time bye
29:38and remember
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