- 7 minutes ago
Mind Your Language Season 1 Episode 2 '' An Inspector Calls
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Short filmTranscript
00:11Do-do-do-do-do
00:30Do-do-do-do-do-do-wa
00:33Do-do-do-do-do-do-wa
00:51Excuse me, young man.
00:53Sí, señora.
00:54Are you in Mr. Brown's class?
00:56Por favor.
00:57Mr. Brown's class.
00:59Brown.
01:00Mr. Brown?
01:01Ah, sí.
01:03Juan Cervantes.
01:04Para servir la señora.
01:06Yes.
01:07But are you in Mr. Brown's class?
01:10English as a foreign language?
01:12Por favor.
01:13Are you really as stupid as you look?
01:17Oh, no, no.
01:18Ah, excuse me.
01:19You are in Mr. Brown's class, aren't you?
01:22And he?
01:22Are you around you?
01:27Doesn't Mr. Brown teach you anything?
01:29Por favor.
01:31You.
01:32Yes, please, Missy.
01:34Can I be assisting you in anywhere whatsoever?
01:37Last to break through.
01:39Are you in Mr. Brown's class?
01:42No.
01:43I am in corridor.
01:45Do you think you could give him a message?
01:48Oh, certainly.
01:49I am Miss Courtney.
01:50And I am Ranjit Singh.
01:53Just at this particular moment, I'm not really bothered who you are.
01:57I just want you to give Mr. Brown a message.
01:59I'll be very happy to comply with the request.
02:02Would you tell him I would like a word with him?
02:04Oh, certainly.
02:06Which word would you like?
02:09Just say I want to speak to him.
02:14Foreigners.
02:15Quiet, please.
02:18Settle down.
02:23Right.
02:24Good evening.
02:26Adhan, sir.
02:27There's all we appear to be some missing.
02:29I hope they haven't dropped out.
02:31Oh, please.
02:32It'll not be surprising me.
02:33I am always thinking that the Sikh son of a guru was a Punjabi dropout.
02:39Are you hearing what you are saying, you miserable sport of a gift?
02:44Don't you two start again.
02:45Actually, you're late.
02:47A thousand apologies for this unforgivable tardiness.
02:51But you are all unavoidably detained in the corridor by a lady.
02:55Si, si.
02:57Do I take it, Vann, that you understood what Ranjit was saying?
03:00For favor.
03:01Oh, sorry.
03:01I don't understand.
03:03Who was this lady who detained you in the corridor?
03:05Oh, blimey.
03:07I am forgetting her name.
03:10She was a big lady.
03:12Very large bosom.
03:15Very good.
03:18Yes, well, while you're trying to remember her name, perhaps you'd better sit down.
03:22Thanks.
03:23Yeah, yeah.
03:24Now, I hope you've all done your homework.
03:26Yes, Professor.
03:27Excuse me, please.
03:29I am remembering the name, Missy Courtney.
03:33No, Miss Courtney.
03:34Yes, absolutely.
03:36The lady with the larger bosom.
03:38He's wanting to see you.
03:40Yes, well, she'll just have to wait.
03:42Squeeze me, please.
03:43She is already waiting.
03:46Well, she may be the principal, but I have a class to teach.
03:49Now, as I was saying, about...
03:50Oh.
03:51Ah.
03:52Miss, uh, large...
03:53Um...
03:55Miss Courtney.
03:56I was just on my way to see you, actually.
03:58That's not the impression I got.
04:00Well, I shan't be a moment, class.
04:01Oh, it's all right.
04:01Don't bother.
04:03I merely wanted to tell you that you can expect another student.
04:05Oh, jolly good.
04:06More the merrier.
04:07You're not here to make merry, Mr. Brown.
04:10No, no.
04:10It was just a figure of speech.
04:11Well, you better try teaching a few figures of speech to your students.
04:14They seem to be in need of it.
04:15I'm doing my best.
04:17Huh.
04:18Oh, Miss Courtney.
04:20Yes?
04:20This new student, what nationality can I expect?
04:23African.
04:24Oh, African.
04:27Right, now, you remember I asked you all to write an essay,
04:29a short story about your life here in England.
04:32Hope you've all done so, have you?
04:33Yes, I have.
04:34Good, good.
04:35Well, I shall go round the class
04:36and ask each of you to read out what you've written.
04:38Anna, shall we start with you?
04:41My Life in England by Anna Schmidt.
04:44Good.
04:44Very good.
04:48Yeah, but go on.
04:49There is no more.
04:51Oh, that's all there is?
04:52Yeah, I have no time to write more.
04:54Always that Mrs. Walker is keeping me busy.
04:57Anna do this, Anna do that.
04:58But she is a slave driver, that Mrs. Walker.
05:01Walker.
05:02What?
05:02W is pronounced...
05:04W.
05:05Your employer's name is Walker.
05:07Yeah, Walker.
05:08Do you know how many shirts Mrs. Walker made me iron last night?
05:13Walker.
05:13Yeah, Walker.
05:15Then I had to prepare a meal for the bitch.
05:22Anna, she may be a hard task, mistress,
05:24but I don't think you ought to call her that.
05:26Who?
05:26Mrs. Walker.
05:27Walker.
05:29I was meaning the dog bitch.
05:32Oh, yes, yes.
05:34That is why I'm having no time for the homework.
05:37Yes, well, not to worry.
05:38You really must concentrate on those W sounds.
05:41W.
05:42W.
05:42No, W.
05:43Homework.
05:44Danielle, would you like to read us your essay?
05:47Oui.
05:50What I like about England, by Mademoiselle Daniel Favre, telephone 246.
06:00A good, uh, carry on.
06:01Excuse me.
06:02Yes, Giovanni.
06:03Was that 8021 or 8015?
06:088021.
06:09Look, never mind what number it was.
06:11You're here to improve your English, not chat up other students.
06:13You are absolutely right, Professor.
06:15It's just, I'd like to improve my French as well.
06:19Well, you can do that in your own time.
06:21Carry on, Daniel.
06:24I like England because the glass is so green and the purple are so nice.
06:29People?
06:29Yes.
06:32And especially the man.
06:35Quiet, quiet.
06:38Englishmen are so charming, so handsome and so sexy.
06:47Silence, please.
06:49Yeah, I think that'll do, Daniel.
06:51But I've written much more.
06:53All about the things I like to do at night.
06:58Yes, well, I don't think we'd better go into those.
07:00Please, I'll be reading all your essays later.
07:03Jamila, I don't suppose you've written anything, have you?
07:06Anji, please.
07:08Uh...
07:09Written anything?
07:10No?
07:11No.
07:12Look, you really, really must start to speak a little, Jamila.
07:16Speak.
07:17Papa.
07:18Papa.
07:18Oh, oh, oh.
07:18Achha, Anji.
07:19Yeah, I don't know how much I can speak.
07:20I don't know how much I can speak.
07:20No, no, no, no, no.
07:22In English.
07:23You must try to speak English.
07:25Look, try saying good evening.
07:28Eh?
07:30All right, let's start with the good.
07:31Good.
07:32Good.
07:34It's not difficult, Jamila.
07:36Come on.
07:37Good.
07:40Look, you nearly said it, Ben.
07:42Come on.
07:43Good.
07:43Good, good, good, good.
07:44Now, please, no prompting.
07:51Good.
07:52Yeah.
07:53Excellent.
07:54Well done.
07:54Now, try evening.
07:56Evening.
07:57It's not difficult, Jamila.
07:59Come on.
08:00Evening.
08:02Yes, yes.
08:03Come on.
08:04Good.
08:06I know you can say good.
08:09Say evening.
08:10Evening.
08:11Evening.
08:12Evening.
08:13Havening.
08:15Yes.
08:16Yes.
08:16Very good.
08:18Yes, good.
08:19Now, put them both together.
08:21Good evening.
08:25God havening.
08:28God havening.
08:31God havening.
08:32God havening.
08:35God havening.
08:36Good, good.
08:36God havening.
08:37God havening.
08:38Good, good.
08:38Well done.
08:39We'll try some new words later.
08:41Sue Lee, have you written anything?
08:44Yes, yes.
08:45Fine.
08:50What I like about England.
08:54England is becoming more politically-minded and gradually more...
09:00The overthrow of decadent capitalistic government will soon take place
09:05as working classes become more educated and embrace communism as the true way of right.
09:13Workers' revolution getting nearer with inevitable corrupts of imperialistic bourgeois intellectual society.
09:20Yes, well, if that's what you like about England, I wouldn't want to read what you didn't like.
09:25Excuse.
09:26Raison.
09:26Tarot.
09:31Ah.
09:35But I have smaller observation on young lady's discourse
09:42that will also illustrate increased knowledge of English.
09:51Certainly, Tarot. Go ahead.
09:53With respect.
09:54Young lady, Spiko, road of couplers.
10:02Attitude typical of fascist Nipponese.
10:05Japan, civilized or country not like China.
10:09Run by peasant talk.
10:11Chinese, not peasant talk.
10:13Japanese, not fascist talk.
10:17Oh, Sue Lee. Sue Lee, come on.
10:20Tarot, please go and apologize.
10:22Apologize?
10:22Yes.
10:23I'll lose Faisal.
10:25Not my photo.
10:26Well, never mind.
10:27Never mind his photo.
10:29I was going to play.
10:32Please.
10:33Hold me.
10:34Wait for it.
10:36Wait for it.
10:37Wait for it.
10:37Wait for it.
10:38Wait for it.
10:41Wait for it.
10:42Wait for it.
10:44Wait for it.
10:45Okay.
10:53Mrs. Courtney.
10:54Miss.
10:55Sir, sorry.
10:56I'm Roger Kenyon from the Education Authority.
10:58Oh.
10:59Oh, they told me they were sending an inspector round,
11:02but I really didn't expect.
11:03He would be black.
11:05He would be so young.
11:06My apologies.
11:08But the authority likes to check that the standards
11:10of the evening classes are up to par.
11:11I can assure you that my standards here are well over, Pa.
11:15I'm glad to hear it.
11:16Well, Mr Kenyon, if you'd like to come with me, I'll show you around.
11:19No, no, no, please.
11:20I'd rather just wander around on my own, if you don't mind.
11:23I usually get a much clearer picture that way.
11:31Wait up!
11:32Wait up!
11:38Everything all right?
11:39Ever since all chaos.
11:41We have a glee to differ.
11:43Ah, right.
11:44Excuse me, please.
11:45Ah, our new African.
11:47Pardon?
11:47Yeah, I've been expecting you.
11:49Me?
11:49Yes, I was told I'd have a new pupil.
11:51Look, it's nearly time for our tea break,
11:52so why don't you just go to the back for a minute,
11:53and I'll take your particulars later.
11:55But please, you...
11:56Now, be a good chap, and don't argue.
11:57Just go and sit there, all right?
11:59Yes, but...
12:07Sit.
12:07Yes, please.
12:10Have a nice day.
12:10Yes, please.
12:11Yes, please.
12:13Yes, please.
12:14Yes, please.
12:17Me...
12:18Sit.
12:3610p, dear. Thank you, love. That's it. Next.
12:42You sit here.
12:44Merci.
12:49I get the coffee.
12:50Yes.
12:50Coffee black?
12:52Thank you, please.
12:53Coffee black.
12:54Hey, I'll get the coffee for Daniel.
12:57Too bad.
12:58Sugar?
12:59Merci.
13:01How about the biscuit? Do you like the biscuit?
13:03I would like that.
13:05Good.
13:07I'll be back.
13:10A packet of biscuits, please.
13:12Look, wait your time, love. There's a clue here.
13:15Go on.
13:19Next.
13:20God happening.
13:23Yeah, good evening. Tea or coffee, love?
13:28God happening.
13:30I heard you the first time. Tea or coffee?
13:35Oh, cha.
13:37Tea.
13:38Ha, ha.
13:4010p.
13:42God happening.
13:43Yeah.
13:4510p.
13:47I'll pay for that and a coffee for me, please.
13:49And a coffee for you.
13:52Are you Mr. Brown?
13:54Yes.
13:54Oh, I've got a message for you.
13:57From her ladyship.
13:58Oh, lady who?
14:00Miss Courtney.
14:02She's been in here and she wants to see you.
14:04Yeah, I know what she does want.
14:06Yes, Mr. Brown.
14:09You want to see me?
14:10In my office?
14:11Immediately.
14:14Careful, that's coffee. You'll spill it.
14:16Por favor.
14:16That's coffee.
14:18Gracias.
14:19Buena.
14:21Buena.
14:22Buena.
14:23Cheers.
14:24Same again, please.
14:25Oh, nothing, Mr. Brown.
14:27Thank you, love.
14:29Packet of biscuits, please.
14:31Oh, I'm sorry. We haven't any left.
14:34Oh, good, good. You've come to have a cup of coffee?
14:39Coffee?
14:41Yes, coffee. This stuff.
14:50Enter.
14:53It has taken you two minutes, 38 seconds exactly
14:55to come to my office immediately.
14:57I'm glad I didn't ask you to take your time.
15:00Well, I'm sorry. I was detained.
15:02Well, I thought I'd better tell you
15:04that an inspector has arrived.
15:06Oh, my conscience is clear.
15:07I beg your pardon?
15:08Well, apart from the odd parking ticket,
15:10I've never had any trouble with the police.
15:12An education inspector.
15:14Ah, I see. I'm sorry. How stupid of me.
15:17Yes.
15:18Well, you'll probably want to call in on your class.
15:21Oh, well, don't worry. I'll deal with him.
15:22You don't deal with inspectors
15:24from the local authority, Mr. Brown.
15:26You cosset them and flatter them
15:27and agree with everything they say.
15:29Yeah, well, I'll do that as well.
15:30Well, I expect you'll want to see your register.
15:33My register?
15:34You do have a register.
15:37Oh, that register. Yes, of course.
15:38Well, you'd better call it
15:39as soon as you get back to your class.
15:41Right.
15:42By the way, while you're here,
15:43the local authority want me to fill in
15:44a few details about you on this form.
15:46Now, I've got your name.
15:48Yes.
15:49Address.
15:49Yes.
15:50Sex.
15:51Occasionally.
15:56Married?
15:56Sorry.
15:57Uh, no.
15:58I was engaged once.
15:59As a matter of fact, I proposed marriage,
16:01but it didn't really work out.
16:02There was quite a lot of opposition.
16:03Her father?
16:04No, her husband.
16:05I didn't realise she was married at the time.
16:08What do you do during the day?
16:09Oh, well, nothing at the moment, I'm afraid.
16:11I'm waiting for a suitable position.
16:12And what was your last position?
16:14Well, I was teaching at a secondary modern school,
16:16but I left.
16:16I couldn't stand any more beatings.
16:18Well, I didn't think teachers beat children anymore.
16:20Oh, they don't.
16:21It was the other way round.
16:23I think you'd better take this form
16:24and fill it up yourself
16:25and bring it back to me later.
16:26Right.
16:27And do be careful what you say to the inspector.
16:29Oh, of course.
16:30Oh, by the way, the new student has arrived.
16:31You won't forget to add the name to the register,
16:34will you?
16:40Daniel.
16:42Um, what, uh, you do, uh, half the class?
16:45I go and learn the English.
16:47Hey, I'm gonna learn the English as well.
16:49Maybe we learn together, huh?
16:51Yes, but what about poor Max?
16:53Yeah.
16:54What about poor Max?
16:55I'm crying my eyes out.
16:59I have an idea.
17:01I have lots of ideas.
17:03Why not you and Max study together, huh?
17:08Big, big, big.
17:10It's something you always do.
17:11Right, class, now settle down, please.
17:13Quiet.
17:14Now, the first thing we have to do
17:15before we do anything else
17:16is to call the register.
17:18So sorry.
17:18Ah, that's quite all right.
17:20I expect you'll, uh,
17:20have a bit of difficulty
17:21finding your way round at first.
17:23Things will seem rather strange.
17:24Yes, very strange.
17:26Yes.
17:27Must be quite a change
17:27coming from one of the underdeveloped countries
17:29to our more advanced way of life.
17:31Oh, yes.
17:33Still, your people are doing remarkably well.
17:35Did you fly here?
17:36Fly?
17:38How do you mean, buona?
17:41Oh, fly, in a big iron bird.
17:46Quite a change from riding an elephant.
17:49Unless you came by jumbo.
17:54English joke.
17:57Very funny.
17:58Well, perhaps you'd better sit down.
18:01Right, I'm going to call out your names
18:02and will you please answer, present.
18:04Present.
18:06Here, Sally,
18:07but wait until I've called your name out.
18:09Sorry, please.
18:10Ranjit Singh?
18:12Present and correct, please.
18:15Giovanni Coupello?
18:16Si, professori.
18:17No, Giovanni, not professori.
18:19Not professori?
18:20No, you should address me as sir.
18:22Sir?
18:22Yes.
18:25Now I understand.
18:30You have been to get knotted.
18:41Come again?
18:43Well, to become a sir,
18:44you got knotted by the Queen.
18:47The word is knighted
18:49and I'm not that kind of sir.
18:51Maximilian Papandrios.
18:54Maximilian Papandrios?
18:55Mr. Brown is speaking to you.
18:57Is he?
19:01Sorry.
19:02You want something?
19:04Yeah.
19:05Are you here or not?
19:11Well, sure I'm here.
19:13Taro Nagazumi.
19:15Arsehole.
19:20Present.
19:21Anna Schmidt.
19:23Yeah, present.
19:24Present.
19:25Pleasant.
19:27Ali Nadine.
19:29Gift.
19:32Gift.
19:34I'm surprising, you know.
19:36Each day,
19:38I'm learning a new English word.
19:40And I'm finding that gift is another word for peasant.
19:51Very ingenious.
19:52Thank you very much.
19:53Danielle, Favre?
19:55Present.
19:56And I am all here.
20:00See that.
20:02Jamila Ranja?
20:04Anji.
20:04Oh.
20:06Gordon.
20:07Halfening.
20:09Yes, you're here.
20:11And Juan Cervantes.
20:12Por favor.
20:13Present.
20:14Por favor.
20:15You're here.
20:16Present.
20:18I'm going to take down your particulars,
20:20otherwise I may get into hot water.
20:22Oh, you are going to have a hard bath?
20:26No, Ali,
20:27it's just another way of saying I may get into trouble.
20:29Oh, dear.
20:30You have been committing some grievous misdemeanor.
20:34Not at all.
20:35There's an inspector from the local education authority coming round.
20:38Yeah, the big boss.
20:39Yes, I suppose you could say that,
20:40but from my experience,
20:41they're usually interfering old fogies.
20:45You don't like them?
20:46Not particularly.
20:47Frankly, they're quite useless
20:48and about as outdated as their teaching methods.
20:50I mean, what's the point of learning past participles,
20:53cognate objects or subordinate clauses?
20:54It's far more useful
20:55than trying to teach a foreign student
20:57how to order a meal or find accommodation.
20:59You appear to have some rather unique ideas.
21:02Oh, I suppose I have.
21:02You know, you speak English fairly well.
21:06Yeah.
21:07And what is your name?
21:09Roger Kenyon.
21:10Roger Kenyon.
21:12Ah, Miss Courtley,
21:13I'm just completing the register
21:15and getting the details of our new student
21:16before that inspector chappy hooks his motor.
21:19Yes.
21:21Mr Brown.
21:22I shan't be a moment, Miss Courtley.
21:23What is your job?
21:24Inspector.
21:25Oh.
21:26What, local transport?
21:30Local education authority.
21:32Ooh.
21:36I thought he was the new student.
21:38The new student is a female.
21:40Is she?
21:40Well, you didn't tell me that.
21:41Oh, my apologies, Mr Kenyon,
21:43and I do assure you that Mr Brown will be severely dealt with.
21:46I can't remember when I last enjoyed myself so much.
21:49I beg your pardon?
21:50Enjoyed yourself?
21:51You know, Miss Courtney,
21:52your Mr Brown is a remarkable man.
21:55I am?
21:55He is?
21:56Yes.
21:57His teaching methods may be somewhat revolutionary,
22:00but they appear to work.
22:01I have always encouraged my staff to be forward-thinking.
22:05Mm-hmm.
22:06Well, I'll pass on your comments to the authority.
22:10Perhaps they revise their textbooks.
22:12Now, if you'll excuse me,
22:13I must put in an appearance at the other classes.
22:19Oh, well, keep up the good work, Mr Brown,
22:22and thank you very much for the coffee.
22:25I'll come with you, Mr Kenyon.
22:30Blimey!
22:31You are dropping a clinker!
22:32Blimey!
22:36You mean clangor!
22:38Yes, please.
22:38Yes, well...
22:39Right, let's continue with our lesson.
22:41Get out your textbooks.
22:42I'm going to give you all a few exercises.
22:44Uh, scusi, professori, sir.
22:46I can't do any exercises.
22:48Why not?
22:48I've got a bad back.
22:52Excuse me, I was looking for a...
22:54Ah, at last!
22:55A pity you didn't arrive half an hour earlier.
22:57Why?
22:57You might have saved me a great deal of embarrassment
22:59with a certain African gentleman.
23:01Oh.
23:01Yes, he was a school's inspector,
23:02but I mistook him for you.
23:03You thought a gentleman was me?
23:05Yeah.
23:06The silly fool tried to pretend he was a student
23:08and sit at the back to try to catch me up,
23:09but I saw through him.
23:11I'd rather you think he was a bit stupid.
23:13Oh, definitely.
23:14Thick as a brush.
23:15Was his name Mr Kenyon?
23:16Yes.
23:17Do you know him?
23:18I should do.
23:19I've come to collect him.
23:20Ah.
23:21I am his wife.
23:24Oh, blimey, yes!
23:25You have dropped another clinker!
23:33I have to type them in in the playing world.
23:42So?
23:50Bye-bye.
23:54Bye-bye.
23:55Bye-bye.
23:56I'm your от bogoks because he never turned into trouble.
23:57Bye-bye.
23:57Bye-bye.
23:58Bye-bye.
23:59Bye-bye.
23:59Bye-bye.
23:59Woo-bye.
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