- 2 hours ago
You’re Killing Me S01E03
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:02I don't care.
00:04The drilling has been non-stop.
00:07Well, it's affecting sales, so it is my business.
00:12No. No.
00:14Look, something ain't right.
00:17How long does it take to put in cable internet?
00:21Oh, you've been saying that all week.
00:23I just had a conversation with my lawyers.
00:26You keep this up, and heads will roll.
00:29Understand me?
00:32Good.
00:34Hey, what are you?
00:55I thought we agreed not to use emojis in the outline.
00:58They show tone.
01:01You know, I don't get paid by the comma.
01:03Because run-on sentences are just so charming and rebellious.
01:05Commas, slow down the read.
01:07But whatever. Honestly, I think it's ready.
01:10Okay.
01:10Oh, I can't look at it anymore.
01:14Oh, rest in peace, Nash.
01:16I hope we did you justice.
01:20Ship it.
01:22I tell you, the publishers, they better love this.
01:25It's been years since I pulled an all-nighter.
01:27I do my best work at night.
01:28Oh, I believe that.
01:30All right, now that we are done with this, I guess I am going to have to go to the
01:35town council meeting this evening.
01:36Oh, that sounds charming in a children of the corn kind of way.
01:40It's boring as hell.
01:42But I am the outgoing honorary mayor, and it is tradition that I pass the baton.
01:48Except in Founders' COVID, it's a golden rake.
01:51What? It's a clamming thing.
01:53What's next? A seaweed sash and an oyster crown?
01:56Uh-huh.
01:57Why have you been skipping calls this week?
02:00It's just telemarketers.
02:01Nothing.
02:03You know, maybe I will tag along to this town meeting thing.
02:05They go on for hours.
02:07Trust me, you're going to be bored out of your skull.
02:08Something tells me they're going to have a lot to talk about.
02:15Local car dealer, Bert McCarron.
02:18Jeez, I bought my SUV from him.
02:20Found dead in his backyard.
02:22It appears he died when an electronic insect killer fell into his outdoor spa.
02:27His body was then...
02:29Was then moved and posed nearby.
02:31It's your first book, Elliot.
02:33It's exactly how Edgar died.
02:34It doesn't say how he was posed.
02:36Okay.
02:37You know what?
02:38The police need to know this.
02:41Okay.
02:42You've reached the Founders' Cove crime hotline.
02:45You are the 18th caller...
02:45You know what?
02:46It's going to be much faster if we just drive there.
02:49Damn it.
02:49My SUV is in the shop.
02:51I can drive us.
02:52They're supposed to meet Noah for coffee anyway.
02:57So...
02:58Coffee with Noah, huh?
03:00Yep.
03:02I'm surprised.
03:05Why?
03:07Come on.
03:09Seriously?
03:11What is all this?
03:14She just needs a second.
03:15Is it a new thing?
03:17No, she always does this.
03:18No.
03:19I meant no.
03:20Uh, yeah, I guess.
03:24Well, it's just you and Oliver seemed...
03:27You helped me out for the wedding when I interrupted you and...
03:30In bed?
03:31Mm, mm, mm, mm.
03:32And now Noah?
03:34We're just friends, okay?
03:35Take a deep breath.
03:37And Oliver?
03:37Have you ever heard of boundaries?
03:41There she goes.
03:49Okay, it's great that the cable company is upgrading the internet, but it's taking forever.
03:54Forever?
03:56Forever?
03:57I've only been here a month.
03:59Really?
04:00Seems longer.
04:02Hey, Miss Jim.
04:03Hey.
04:04Give me five minutes?
04:05Yep, no problem.
04:06Jack, we need to talk about Bert McCarron.
04:08Okay.
04:08He was electrocuted in a hot tub and then pulled from the tub and posed on the ground.
04:12You read the story.
04:13No, I wrote the story.
04:15That's how the victim in my first Selena St. Cloud novel got killed.
04:18That's a coincidence.
04:21There were four stones placed on the body, weren't there?
04:28How do you know that?
04:29Plato's four cardinal virtues, the killer in my first novel, placed four smooth basalt
04:35river stones on his victim's body because the stones were purified by the rush of water.
04:40It was my symbolic period.
04:42I see.
04:43So is this like one of those copycat things?
04:46Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves.
04:48We're still looking at leads.
04:49But if this is related to one of your books, then I need to know, have you had any problems
04:53with anyone lately?
04:54I mean, besides you?
04:55Huh, good one.
04:56No, like any threads, any obsessed fans?
05:00No.
05:02You're sure?
05:04Completely sure.
05:05Cross my heart.
05:06Oh.
05:07Well, in that case, you think of anything, you let me know.
05:11Okay.
05:11Oh, also, that name you gave me.
05:14Andy's mom?
05:15Yeah.
05:16So I called in a favor with a friend by the FBI.
05:18Haven't heard back, but I'll let you know.
05:23Sorry, Noah.
05:24She's going to have to take a rain check.
05:25Come on.
05:26We're going.
05:30Please, please, please!
05:34Aging Uncle Fester.
05:36Okay.
05:37Norman is the president of the Salina St. Cloud fan club.
05:40Wait, we're meeting with one of your fans?
05:44If there is a crazy person who plans to become Founders Cove's first copycat killer, Norman
05:50will know who it is.
05:51How well do you know this person?
05:53He won a contest a few years ago.
05:55I picked him up.
05:56I took him to coffee.
05:57He stole the hairbrush out of my purse, which was a little strange.
06:00Actually, he just took the hair, but he's a really sweet guy.
06:03Yeah, you'll see.
06:08Alison Chandler?
06:10Hi, Norman.
06:11This is Andy, my new...
06:14Whatever.
06:15We need your help.
06:17Anything you need.
06:19Please.
06:20Please, come in.
06:22Thanks.
06:36I love what you've done with the place, Norman.
06:38You're too kind.
06:40How do you take your tea?
06:41Do not eat or drink anything.
06:42You are being paranoid.
06:44Look at that bottle of arsenic.
06:45I'm pretty sure it's real.
06:46Milk and sugar!
06:47Your wish is my command.
06:50Is that?
06:52Salina St. Cloud's signature trench coat from Hemlock and Heartache.
06:55Actually, it's my trench coat.
06:57Norman won it at a charity auction.
07:00Technically, he stole it from a charity auction.
07:03Yeah, it's totally normal.
07:05Poisonberry tea for my lovely guests.
07:10Oh, thank you.
07:12Okay.
07:13And try their murder morsels.
07:15Their Bates family recipe.
07:16I'm sorry, did you say Bates?
07:18Your name is Norman Bates?
07:20B-A-I-G-H-T-S.
07:22My mother had a wicked sense of humor.
07:24Is she down in the fruit cellar?
07:26I'm so sorry.
07:28She has no manners.
07:31So, back to the murder.
07:32That car salesman, yes.
07:33I bought a car from him a few years ago.
07:35I think he ripped me off.
07:36Oh, he rips everyone off.
07:38Whoever killed him would have to have an insatiable attention to detail.
07:41To copy the murder from your book right down to the four stones of cardinal virtue.
07:46Which reminds me, I have to show you something.
07:54Ta-da!
07:55I only turn on when I have company.
07:59Can you think of anyone who might have wanted to...
08:02A few people come to mind.
08:03I'll make you a list.
08:05And it goes without saying, if you'd like to lay low, you could always stay here.
08:17Okay, I recognize some of the names on this list.
08:19Grayson Doyle, he sends the strangest Christmas cards.
08:22Are you blind?
08:23It's clearly Norman.
08:24The bug zapper?
08:25The bowl of polished stones?
08:27I mean, don't you think it's a little coincidental, given what happened to McCarran?
08:30It is the signature killing method from my first novel.
08:33Frankly, I'd be a little offended if he didn't have the bug zapper or the bowl of rocks.
08:36He bought his car from McCarran Motors.
08:38And he said that Bert ripped him off.
08:39Trust me, Norman wouldn't do anything to hurt the Selina St. Cloud franchise.
08:43The guy adores me.
08:45Oh yeah, he adores you so much he wants to wear your skin.
08:48I did a background check before I met him.
08:50He's just a little eccentric.
08:53Oh, we're going to be late for the town meeting.
08:55Come on, let's go.
09:00All right, everyone.
09:01Before we start our council meeting,
09:03I have the great privilege of overseeing the transfer of power.
09:07Tonight, we will be welcoming our newly elected honorary mayor and local meteorologist on Channel 49,
09:13Ms. Connie Newsome.
09:17As per town bylaws, the ceremony is not complete without the passing of the golden rake
09:22from our outgoing honorary mayor, Alison Chandler.
09:28Thank you, Martin, our long-time town council chair.
09:31It was a close election, and I know I have big shoes to fill.
09:34Size 11, right, Alison?
09:36Thank you to all of you.
09:38And here's to a future filled with sunny skies.
09:48You didn't tell me that there was an election, and you lost to the weather slut.
09:53It was rigged.
09:54Now, everyone, before we continue, please bow your heads for a moment of silence,
09:58and remember our friend, Bert McCarron,
10:01as well as our friend, Nash Gilbert, Alison Chandler's mentor.
10:06Oh, and Brandon Hayes.
10:08He wasn't from here.
10:09He was just visiting, but he was murdered here also at Alison Chandler's house.
10:17Thank you, everyone.
10:19On to town business.
10:20Now, look, as most of you know, we've been in an economic downturn,
10:25and Sea Line Bank, of all places, is going to be moving its branch to a newer facility.
10:30Isn't that the guy from the Mystery Convention?
10:31Martin Adams, his grandfather, started Founders Chowder in, like, the 40s.
10:37It used to be a real hot spot.
10:39And Martin took it over a couple years ago, poured every penny he has into it.
10:44So, planning for the future?
10:46Your town council has pushed for an aggressive modernization of town infrastructure,
10:51starting with state-of-the-art fiber optic internet.
10:57Martin, you don't have a packed house here tonight because of the dang interweb.
11:01Who's that?
11:02Tammy B. Stain, my own local Buzzkill.
11:04The cats?
11:05They're the real brains behind the operation.
11:07Speak for yourself, Tammy.
11:09Jennings Creek installed fiber optics in less than two weeks.
11:12It's been going on for over a month here.
11:14It's killing business at my bakery.
11:15No, that's a joke, bro.
11:16She owns a bakery downtown.
11:17Look, I have spoken personally with Whitley Cable,
11:20and Carl tells me that his crew can get this done within the week.
11:23Carl?
11:24My crew's working around the clock to get the job done, Mr. Adams.
11:26What everyone here wants to know is what you're planning to do
11:30about the recent murders in Founders' Cove.
11:34Our local law enforcement is doing everything in its power to track down those responsible.
11:40No.
11:41It's great that some of you are making more money because we are becoming the murder capital of New England,
11:45but the person that stands to benefit the most is Alison Chandler.
11:49And frankly, she should be ashamed of herself.
11:52Sales of Selina St. Cloud novels have tripled,
11:54and this latest murder ripped from the pages of her books.
11:59It's not her fault.
12:00Can we get back to the cable issue, please?
12:02Okay.
12:02If it's not her fault, then whose fault is it?
12:05You want to tell me who that guy is?
12:06He is.
12:07Okay, all right, okay.
12:08No one.
12:09Settle down, people.
12:09Okay, listen.
12:10Look, police are investigating the death from this morning, all right?
12:13At this moment, we have no reason to suspect an ongoing threat.
12:17But of course, if you see something, please, call us, okay?
12:28Peter?
12:29Wait up.
12:32We need to talk.
12:33I've been calling you all week.
12:35You haven't picked out.
12:35Why are you so angry with me?
12:37Oh, please, Allie.
12:39Stupid doesn't become you.
12:40Who gave you all the ideas for those books, hmm?
12:42The poison ring and hemlock and heartache?
12:44The candlestick and passion from the ashes?
12:46Me.
12:47Didn't you say what I did was beneath you?
12:50I was there for you, and you know it.
12:52We're not done.
12:54Lately, we've been flooded by city folks.
12:56It used to be so quiet here before they came.
12:59You know?
12:59Nothing.
13:28It used to be so quiet here.
13:46No prints so far, Jack. Place is clean.
13:48I'm not surprised.
13:52Love, music, and homicide.
13:54Title of your second book, if I'm not mistaken.
13:56I mean, Melody Chopra would normally start her days at the bakery at 5 a.m.
14:00Today, she was a no-show because one forced trauma to the head.
14:05Just like my book.
14:06Just like your book.
14:08Chopin's Nocturne in C-Sharp Minor.
14:10Wait, wasn't Norman playing this?
14:12Who's Norman?
14:13The menacquaintance.
14:15Norman's her obsessed fan.
14:16I thought you didn't have any obsessed fans.
14:19He's not obsessed, he's just enthusiastic.
14:21Norman was playing this piece of music when we were at his house.
14:24I went to his house.
14:25Could you just stop talking?
14:27Time out.
14:28Is this Norman?
14:28No, no, no, shh.
14:29Everybody, just one second.
14:30Let me think.
14:31The metronome.
14:33You turned it off when we got here, but it was too fast.
14:36Too fast for what?
14:37Chopin's Nocturne in C-Sharp Minor.
14:39The tempo is Lento.
14:41Excuse me?
14:42Ten years of piano lessons.
14:43If Melody was playing with the metronome at this tempo,
14:47she wasn't playing this piece of music.
14:50Maybe the killer changed the tempo.
14:53Or, maybe the killer planted the sheet music
14:56to make it look like the murder came from Ollie's book.
15:00To my biggest fan, Norman.
15:02All the best, Alison Chandler.
15:10Oh, this is exactly how I picture the interrogation room.
15:14Remember when Selina was questioned for the murder of Colette Vandele
15:16when she was wrongly accused of Colette's murder in love music and homicide?
15:19Mr. Bates, what were you last night around 9 p.m.?
15:22Is this where the hardened detective pokes all of the poor suspect's storytelling
15:25finally breaks and confesses it?
15:26This is serious.
15:27We found your sign sheet music at the crime scene.
15:31A Chopin's Nocturne...
15:32Nocturne in C-Sharp Minor?
15:34Oh, yes.
15:35Yes, from Chapter 3 and Book 2, of course.
15:36Yes, it's my favorite.
15:38And you were playing that when Miss Chandler came to visit you?
15:40I played all the time.
15:41You had an altercation with a Burt McCarron at his dealership?
15:44I did.
15:44I attended a St. Cloud Soiree in Burlington
15:46and installed a fog machine in my trunk.
15:48McCarron said it invalidated my warranty.
15:50But it was absolutely worth it.
15:53We also found your fingerprints on the stones
15:55that were placed on Mr. McCarron's body.
15:58Well, that's interesting, isn't it?
16:00Where were you last night and the night before?
16:03You gonna book me?
16:04Then it's true!
16:05I have no alibi!
16:06I didn't take me away, copper!
16:08Mr. Bates!
16:08I have only one request!
16:09What's that?
16:10I want to call my lawyer, Conrad Tittle.
16:12That's a lawyer from the Salina St. Cloud Mysteries, isn't it?
16:15He never loses a case.
16:17Okay.
16:18Can we now please agree that there is plenty of hard evidence?
16:23Norman is a little delusional, but he wouldn't hurt a fly.
16:26Okay.
16:27Sell me.
16:28Okay.
16:28He's enjoying this way too much.
16:30He's not showing any signs of stress or guilt.
16:32And he was surprised when Jack mentioned the sheet music
16:35and the fingerprints on the stones.
16:37He clearly has no idea how they got there.
16:39Take me away.
16:40Throw the book at me, lest I strike again!
16:44Mm-hmm.
16:45The evidence against Norman is solid, plus he confessed,
16:49so I have to take that seriously.
16:52Unless you think that that gentleman you were talking to last night
16:55after the meeting of someone I should be worried about instead?
16:58Don't be worried.
17:00All right.
17:02Oh, I hate to break up the party yet again, but we've got to go.
17:05I hear and I obey.
17:07I wish.
17:16Where are they headed?
17:17They didn't say.
17:21So where are we going?
17:23Back to Norman's house.
17:25What the hell for?
17:26Evidence that he didn't kill anyone.
17:43Nice flashlight, by the way.
17:44Did you get that nap?
17:45No.
17:45It works, doesn't it?
17:47This is breaking and entering.
17:49Grow a pair.
17:51See?
17:53It was open.
17:55What exactly are we looking for in here, anyway?
17:57I don't know.
17:58Clues.
17:58Isn't that what we do?
17:59Oh, everything in this house is a clue.
18:00Well, then you can wait in the car.
18:02No!
18:03Classic murder mystery, faux pas number one.
18:04The first one to wander off is always the first one to get killed.
18:07Look at this.
18:09Ah!
18:11Noah!
18:12Before you get mad, Jack made me follow you.
18:15How did you get inside?
18:16Oh, Mr. Bates gave me the key.
18:18You seemed pretty excited to have me poke around.
18:20Well, you should see this.
18:28Huh.
18:30Looks like someone broke in.
18:31I bet Norman didn't even notice.
18:37Well, I told Norman someone broke into his house.
18:39Which means that they could have stolen the rocks and the sheet music and planted them at the crime scene.
18:44Did Norman finally admit that he didn't kill Melody or Bert?
18:47Mm-hmm.
18:48Well, not at first until I pointed out that he was taking time away from your writing and he gave
18:51us an alibi just like that.
18:53Okay, I'm going to go get a candy bar.
18:55You want anything?
18:56Oh, I'm good.
18:57Good.
18:57Okay.
18:59How about a coffee?
19:00High test?
19:01Police grade?
19:02Why not?
19:09I know this is crazy, but I can't help thinking that these murders are my fault.
19:18Look, there's a lot of bad actors out there and nothing you can do changes that.
19:23But don't forget what you do is important.
19:28Your work makes people happy.
19:33Right?
19:35That's what matters.
19:38So, what'd I miss?
19:41Confirmed at the grocery store over on Henningstead Avenue.
19:44They remember seeing Norman at the time of Chilper's murder.
19:46Yeah, all right.
19:48Cut him loose, let him go.
19:51Noah, make sure he leaves.
19:53Yeah.
19:54Okay, so if it's not Norman, who's the prime suspect?
19:57I don't know, but whoever it is, they're following the order of Ali's books.
20:01The killer copy of the murders and the first two.
20:04What's the third one?
20:05Whiskers in the Dark.
20:07The cat lady gets whacked.
20:08And that character was based on Tammy Bustain.
20:12She was at the town meeting last night.
20:21Chandler wrote the murders.
20:22The killer just followed the script.
20:25Oh, and this one.
20:26Plot twist.
20:27The real killer might be holding the pen.
20:29Can you believe what they're writing about me?
20:32Can you please help me go through book number three?
20:34There's got to be a clue in here somewhere.
20:36No, I don't read my work.
20:38Huh?
20:38Once I send the manuscript, I just move on.
20:41Make an exception.
20:45Fine.
20:49You know what, I lost my favorite glasses again.
20:51They're on your head.
20:58I knew that.
21:02Noah, we're on the move.
21:04We're going to stake out at the cat lady's house.
21:05Sounds exciting.
21:07What, you serious?
21:08You got any better leads?
21:09No, not since we cleared Norman.
21:10I got nothing.
21:12Andy was right.
21:13Nothing about this case makes any sense.
21:14Speaking of Andy, you two are kind of chummy.
21:18I was going to say the same thing about you and Ali.
21:27This is so good.
21:29I totally forgot that Selina had a one-night stand with the local sheriff.
21:34Well done, Selina.
21:37Uh, Ali.
21:39Mm-hmm?
21:40Did you forget that there's an attempt on Selina St. Cloud's life halfway through this novel?
21:44Oh, yeah.
21:45Right, the B&E, right?
21:46Yeah.
21:47A masked assailant breaks into her home.
21:50Okay, so?
21:51So?
21:52Isn't Selina St. Cloud based on you?
21:57Oh, okay.
21:58So not happy right now.
22:01Um, let me get my flashlight.
22:03Flashlight?
22:03We need a real flashlight.
22:04Where's my phone?
22:05Oh, did you just see that?
22:07No.
22:08I'm calling 911.
22:09You called my weapons.
22:11Weapons?
22:11Like what?
22:12A dictionary?
22:14God, the cell tower must be down.
22:16Ah!
22:18That came from downstairs.
22:21Oh.
22:22Oh.
22:28Maybe we should just lock ourselves in the bathroom instead.
22:31Oh, you might as well save time and just jump in the wood chipper.
22:34Oh, go for that.
22:44There.
22:45Oh, I got him!
22:48I got him!
22:48Hit him in the bottle!
22:49Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.
22:50Please, please.
22:51Peter?
22:53What the hell are you doing here?
22:55Oh, I told you, we're not done.
22:57Whoa, whoa, whoa.
22:58You two know each other?
22:59No.
23:01Oh!
23:02Oh!
23:03Norman!
23:03What the hell?
23:04I saw the scoundrel creeping through the bushes.
23:07What were you doing in my bushes?
23:08I was worried about you.
23:10Rewind.
23:10How do you two know each other?
23:13Oh, he's, he's, uh...
23:15He's my ex-husband.
23:17One of them.
23:21I wasn't going to hurt anyone, all right?
23:22And she owes me money.
23:23That is so not true.
23:25I just went back to grab a few personal belongings.
23:27Like what?
23:27Like my wine collection and my snowblower.
23:30Oh, I paid for that snowblower.
23:31All right.
23:32All I need to know is, do you plan on pressing charges?
23:36Okay, if she won't, then I will.
23:38He broke into her house.
23:41Okay.
23:44What?
23:45Okay, I know this is not great timing,
23:48but I'll need you to come downtown to take your statements.
23:50Fine.
23:51Okay.
23:53Dr. Red.
23:59I'm okay, everyone.
24:01Thanks for asking.
24:03Okay.
24:06I told you,
24:08Allie wouldn't pay me what I'm owed,
24:09so I did what I had to do.
24:11You've been divorced for over a decade.
24:12She still pays you alimony.
24:13That's right.
24:14You've been arrested before, right?
24:17Harassment,
24:18trespassing,
24:19threats.
24:21A car you purchased at McCarran Motors
24:23was recently repossessed.
24:24Is that right?
24:25Yeah.
24:25I tried to work something out.
24:27McCarran wouldn't listen.
24:28Plus, you've had run-ins with Melody Chopra
24:29at town council meetings.
24:34I get it.
24:35This has nothing to do with breaking tallies.
24:38You think I had something to do with those two murders?
24:40Run-ins with both victims.
24:41The killer clearly wants to implicate
24:43Allie Chandler to her novels.
24:45Where were you Sunday night?
24:47Where were you Monday night?
24:49They stayed in.
24:50Both nights.
24:52Can't corroborate.
24:53Nope.
24:56Why don't I contact your lawyer, Mr. Alweson?
24:58I can't afford a lawyer.
24:59Allie left me high and dry.
25:02She smiles like Sunday
25:04and stings like Monday.
25:05I pity the next man
25:07that gets tangled in her web.
25:18It's a witness statement, not a book.
25:20Just write what you saw.
25:22My dear friend,
25:23I have penned 14
25:24Selina St. Cloud fanfic novels.
25:26Not only does this have to be perfect,
25:28but it has to sing.
25:29So, we've got enough to hold them.
25:32I know it looks bad,
25:33but Peter's never been physically violent.
25:36Altercations with both the victims,
25:37no alibi at the time of the murders.
25:39Plus, clearly has a problem with you.
25:42What if the connections to the books
25:43is all a cover?
25:45Maybe the victims are related somehow?
25:47No, I ran a background check on both of them.
25:49No connections.
25:54So, Peter?
25:55Please don't.
25:56It's been a long night,
25:57and the only sound that I want to hear
25:59is ice hitting a tall glass of bourbon.
26:02Okay.
26:03But why do you put up with this bullshit?
26:07Peter was this incredible playwright,
26:09and I was suddenly a single mom of a teenage boy.
26:13My novels hadn't hit it yet,
26:15and Peter always dreamed of moving to New York City,
26:19the theater scene.
26:21And then I hit it big,
26:24and instead of being happy for me,
26:26he just became resentful.
26:28It took me years to build up the courage to leave him.
26:34I just feel bad that he sacrificed his success for me.
26:37But you know that that's not true, right?
26:41The funny thing is,
26:42the dummy doesn't even realize
26:43I could have stopped paying alimony
26:44a year after the divorce,
26:45but I kept paying.
26:48Why?
26:50I don't know.
26:51Guilt?
26:53Listen to me, Allie.
26:55It's time to kick this loser to the curb.
26:57Oh, I'm going to take relationship advice from you.
27:00For whatever reason,
27:01this asshole still has power over you,
27:03and he's going to have it until you put your foot down.
27:05Your success didn't deprive him of anything.
27:09I need you to know that.
27:13My car's going to be ready in two hours,
27:15and I'm going to go grab some breakfast.
27:18See you later.
27:20And Allie,
27:21not that it's any of your business,
27:23but Oliver and I text.
27:25He's in New York, and I'm here,
27:27so it's no big deal.
27:40I need to ride back to my car.
27:42It's near Miss Chandler's house.
27:45Come on.
27:51Well, if it isn't the great Alison Chandler.
27:54Hey there, Martin.
27:56You know, I don't see you at my restaurant anymore.
27:59I've just been very busy.
28:00I'll make sure to stop by.
28:02Well, yeah, that's what everyone says.
28:05You know, Alison,
28:07I still remember when this place was just a sleepy little town.
28:12People love to, well, to do this,
28:14to sit down across from each other and break bread.
28:17But since the flood of folks from the city,
28:20now we're the murder capital of New England.
28:23Sure sells a lot of books, doesn't it?
28:27Alison, I'm kidding.
28:29Oh, you know how much I love a good St. Cloud mystery, right?
28:32You might even call me a cloudy.
28:34Oh, you cloudy.
28:35Yeah.
28:36Well, enjoy your breakfast, Alison.
28:39Thank you, Martin.
28:40Hmm.
28:46Oh, I almost didn't recognize you.
28:49You look terrible, Alison.
28:51How you holding up?
28:52Hmm.
28:53I'm doing the best I can.
28:54If I were you, I would head up to Smarkling Hills.
28:57The retreat in Vermont is the perfect place to hide out
28:59until this whole murder thing blows over.
29:01I heard Martin was just there last month.
29:04Poor guy.
29:05He needed a little getaway after the bank turned him down so low.
29:08But he came back looking ten years younger.
29:11You should try it.
29:12I don't need to hide out.
29:14Well, those bags under your eyes aren't going to go away on their own.
29:17Ask for Elle.
29:18She works miracles.
29:19See ya.
29:33Thanks for the ride.
29:34Yeah.
29:35And, uh, if Miss Chattery's a bodyguard,
29:40I'm happy to volunteer.
29:41Yeah.
29:42I, uh, I think things are going to calm down
29:43now that the cops are watching the cat lady's house 24-7.
29:46If the killer can't kill the cat lady, then what happens?
29:48I don't know.
29:49I guess the killer moves on to the next book.
29:50Maybe.
29:52But, oh, my God!
29:53Do you not remember the last chapter of Whiskers in the Dark?
29:55Moon, I've read so many books,
29:56they're just blending together at this point.
29:58There's a second attempt on Selina's life.
29:59Someone tries to kill her with a car bomb!
30:01Oh, my God.
30:03Ali's on her way to the shop to get her car right now!
30:05Oh!
30:07This can't be happening.
30:10This is a nightmare!
30:12Hi, this is Ali Chandler.
30:13Dammit, this woman never answers her...
30:14Oh, what's the point in having it?
30:17What are you doing?
30:18My queen needs me.
30:19I'm coming with you.
30:24Shit!
30:29Here you go, Miss Chandler.
30:31Sorry for the wait.
30:31It's been crazy around here.
30:32I was so sorry to hear about Bert.
30:35Yeah, poor guy been under a lot of stress.
30:37All the drilling that's been going on,
30:38customers didn't want to come in.
30:40Mr. McCarrion even wrote a letter to the town council.
30:45Bye.
30:50No, no, no, no, no!
30:53Miss Chandler, stop!
30:55Okay, try not to panic.
30:57But we think there's a bomb in your car.
30:58The ending of Whisk is in the dark.
31:00Someone tries to kill Selina Zane Cloud with a car bomb.
31:02You think that the copycat killer is trying to kill me?
31:05Yes, because they're following your books.
31:07Oh, Andy, I'm exhausted.
31:08I want to go home.
31:09If the good Lord wants to take me,
31:10he can take me in a warm bubble bath,
31:12not from a ridiculous car bomb.
31:15Oh!
31:15No!
31:17No!
31:17No!
31:38So, again, you did not see anyone suspicious.
31:42I wasn't looking.
31:44I'll be back as soon as I can.
31:47Glad you're okay.
31:53You know, if you hadn't warned me...
31:54No, no, no, no.
31:56Please, no public displays of gratitude.
31:58Norman was the one who remembered the car bomb.
32:00So, you owe him your favorite pair of underwear,
32:03or toenail clippings, I can't remember which.
32:05Probably both.
32:06It's probably both.
32:12Hey, does it bug you
32:14that the two people who were killed
32:16worked basically across the street from each other?
32:19I hadn't thought of it.
32:20Maybe because they were both at home
32:22and not at work when they died.
32:24Bert McCarron and Melody Chopra
32:25both complained about the cable construction downtown.
32:28Everybody was upset about the noise, not just them.
32:31Yeah, okay, but maybe it's about more than that.
32:35The dealership is here, right?
32:37Melody's bakery is there.
32:40And what's right down the street from both of them?
32:44The bank.
32:46What if all of this cable construction
32:49is just a distraction?
32:51Martin said that the bank
32:53is moving locations next month.
32:55That building is super old.
32:56A new location would probably have better security.
32:59Okay, good theory.
33:01Sell me.
33:01Okay, all of those drills and jackhammers
33:04that the installers are using,
33:05that seems like total overkill
33:07for a simple cable upgrade.
33:09Bert had a short fuse, right?
33:11He's had enough.
33:12So he complains to the crew.
33:13They placate him for a while,
33:15but he notices the big tools.
33:17He starts asking too many questions.
33:18Maybe he threatens to go to the police
33:20and have them investigate.
33:23Melody.
33:24Melody works early mornings at the bakery,
33:26so maybe she saw something she shouldn't have.
33:29She gets suspicious.
33:31She threatens to report them.
33:32And if either one of them
33:34had contacted the town council
33:36or the police to complain,
33:38they would need to be silenced.
33:39But to divert suspicion,
33:41the killer copies the murders from your books.
33:43And the tunnels under the street
33:46would go directly under the bank.
33:49So they drool through the floor,
33:50they snatch the cash from the vault
33:52without ever triggering an alarm,
33:54and all of that noise
33:55is chopped up to a town-wide fiber optic upgrade.
33:58And they're not working right now,
33:59so where are they?
34:00Well, we need to tell Jack.
34:07I think he might already know.
34:11We're on a bolo on a white Whitley cable van
34:13heading out of Founders Cove.
34:15Block all exits, block all highways.
34:17Do it now.
34:17Noah, start a campus.
34:18Somebody must have seen something.
34:19Got it.
34:20Start at the end of the street.
34:21Work your way back.
34:22You. You're with me.
34:22They hit the vault.
34:24Cleaned it out.
34:25And they're gone.
34:26How long ago?
34:27Rebar's still warm,
34:27so it just happened.
34:28Hopefully we get something on the radio soon.
34:29Okay, but there's still the copycat angle.
34:32I mean, whoever is behind this
34:33has to know my work
34:35down to the last little pretty detail.
34:36Which brings us right back to
34:37Grace Van or your ex.
34:39Could there be anyone else?
34:40Wait a second.
34:41Who was the one who pushed for the internet upgrade?
34:43Uh, Martin Adams.
34:46I mean, he pressured all of us to vote for it.
34:49The service tech at McCarran Motors
34:52said that Bert had filed a complaint
34:54with the town council,
34:55but I was still on town council
34:56when that complaint would have come in,
34:57and I didn't hear one word about it.
34:59He must have made the complaint to Martin,
35:01and Martin didn't want anyone to know about it.
35:03I mean, everyone knows
35:04that Founders Cove Chowder was in trouble,
35:07and Connie said that he had just been turned down
35:10for a loan by the bank.
35:11So he decided to rob the bank instead,
35:13and now he's skipping town.
35:16APB on Martin Adams,
35:17and APB on Martin Adams.
35:19Wait a minute.
35:20Don't worry.
35:25I'm fine.
35:35I'm fine.
35:37Bert McCarran and Melody Chopra were murdered
35:40because they suspected that the cable crew
35:42was doing more than just installing cable.
35:45What about the similarity to your books?
35:47That's just a distraction,
35:48but whoever planned this
35:50forgot to take one thing into account.
35:52What's that?
35:53Selina St. Cloud is always one step ahead.
35:56Thanks, JJ.
35:57Thanks, guys.
35:59Oh, that's right.
36:00Vaughn all over the high and mighty Alison Chandler.
36:03You know, this used to be a nice town
36:05before people like her showed up.
36:06Settle down, tough guy.
36:08Police got the cable crew going south.
36:10Turns out Whitley Cable was a complete front.
36:12Those guys are all convicted felons.
36:14How did Martin get tangled up with them?
36:16So that guy that was pretending
36:18to be the foreman, Carl,
36:19told Carl was a regular at Martin's Restaurant.
36:21Carl and Martin get to talking.
36:23Martin needs money.
36:23Carl has a plan.
36:24Oh, and Martin had already booked
36:26a flight to South America,
36:27and if it weren't for you,
36:28he would have been long gone.
36:30Well done.
36:35So, uh, I guess it's too soon
36:38to have heard back about Andy's mom?
36:40No, actually, I did hear.
36:42My friend ran that name
36:44through every database they had.
36:45State, federal, and nothing.
36:50I don't mean just nothing
36:51since the disappearance.
36:53I mean nothing since birth.
36:55That doesn't make sense.
36:57I know.
36:58It's like...
37:01It's like Renee Walker never existed.
37:06I...
37:06Noah, let's go.
37:30Is this some kind of joke?
37:34This is the last money
37:35you will ever get from me.
37:37But there are strings attached.
37:39You need to leave town.
37:41You think this is enough
37:42to pay me off?
37:43You owe me a whole lot more than this.
37:45I don't owe you a damn thing.
37:48I spent years blaming myself
37:50for leaving you.
37:51Because believe it or not,
37:52there was a time
37:53when I thought you were
37:54the most charming, brilliant man
37:56that ever walked the planet.
37:59Looking back,
38:01you are a god-awful husband.
38:04You convinced me
38:05that I was the reason
38:06you couldn't pursue
38:07your career in New York.
38:08Because it was true.
38:09We've been divorced for years.
38:12And yet,
38:13you're still here.
38:15And all those ideas
38:16that you gave me
38:17from my books,
38:19stagey cliches,
38:20and I only put them in there
38:21to make you feel better
38:22about yourself.
38:23I guess I wasn't the one
38:24standing in your way.
38:26You were.
38:28Go be miserable
38:29somewhere else.
38:31You're not my problem anymore.
38:33What?
38:44Ronald,
38:45this is a surprise.
38:47Can't a manager
38:47call his favorite client
38:49just to say hello?
38:50Didn't I tell you
38:50not to call me
38:52while you're eating?
38:54I heard
38:55from the publishers.
38:56They loved
38:57the outline.
38:58Okay.
39:00Fantastic.
39:01But here's the thing.
39:02There's a shit ton of hype
39:03about this, um,
39:04copycat killer
39:04in Founders Cove.
39:06So,
39:06they have an idea.
39:08Oh, no.
39:09They never have good ideas.
39:11I mean,
39:12the St. Cloud sales
39:12are smashing records.
39:15So,
39:15they want to shelve
39:17the Nash Gilbert
39:18true crime story.
39:20And instead,
39:21you come up
39:22with a new
39:22St. Cloud novel.
39:24Okay.
39:25Please tell me
39:25you did not agree to this.
39:27This is a good thing, Ali.
39:28It's a great thing.
39:29But,
39:30they need
39:30a new outline
39:31by next week.
39:32They're shooting
39:32for a December release
39:33just before Christmas.
39:35A new outline
39:36in a week?
39:37Yeah.
39:38On the bright side.
39:39You're never crazy
39:40about working with
39:41Andy,
39:42whatever her name is.
39:43So,
39:44now you don't have to.
39:45We'll shoot her
39:45a few bucks
39:45and ba-boom!
39:47That's that.
39:49So,
39:50they're not asking
39:50for her,
39:51too?
39:52No.
39:53Ali,
39:53they want you.
39:54You.
39:56Call me
39:57if you need
39:57anything.
40:05You're trending!
40:07That means
40:08that basically
40:09I know what trending is.
40:10Oh.
40:10So,
40:11I just got off the phone
40:11with Ronald.
40:13The outline?
40:14Change of plans.
40:15They have decided
40:16to put the Nash book
40:17on hold
40:18and they want
40:18a new
40:19Selena St. Cloud novel
40:21instead.
40:23Oh.
40:26I mean,
40:28you can understand
40:29why.
40:30Now the press,
40:31you know,
40:32and sales
40:33are off the charts.
40:36No.
40:38No,
40:39yeah.
40:39I get it.
40:42I get it.
40:45I guess you don't
40:46need me anymore
40:47then.
40:53Got it.
40:56Not so fast.
40:59They are adding
41:00a sidekick character
41:03to be
41:04Selena's assistant
41:05and they're making
41:06me keep you on.
41:09Selena's world
41:09is already established.
41:11That's what I told them.
41:12But they wouldn't listen.
41:14But hey,
41:15listen,
41:15if you are not up
41:16for the challenge,
41:17I don't know.
41:26Bring it on.
41:30Think we have it.
41:33Never know.
41:35Let me try.
41:38Here goes nothing.
41:40Cause everything is nice.
41:43Never know.
41:44Never know.
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