00:00That was...
00:02Wow.
00:06That was.
00:08So did you, uh...
00:13Did you get yours?
00:15Did I what?
00:17Did you...
00:18Did you finish?
00:23If you have to ask,
00:25then I probably...
00:26You can be honest with me.
00:27I mean, like, anything is fair game.
00:29Okay, um, so I'm like a...
00:31You know, I'm like an ambiance girl.
00:33And, you know, walking in,
00:34seeing your roommate passed out,
00:36half naked, covered in peanut butter,
00:38didn't really put me in the mood
00:41for intimacy.
00:44I get it.
00:45You're afraid to be loud.
00:46You're afraid to be vocal with it.
00:47Brad can't hear you.
00:48He's a really cool dude.
00:49These walls are thick.
00:50No, um...
00:50I know you were trying to, like,
00:51hold back screams the whole time,
00:52but you totally can.
00:54Your bed is on the floor.
01:00I mean, I know you were a dirty girl.
01:01I knew you would like it.
01:02Yeah, it's disgusting, right?
01:03I feel like I'm having sex in a FEMA tent.
01:05You're welcome.
01:06That's not a compliment.
01:07What's next?
01:07The public bathroom?
01:08You know that?
01:08I'm not...
01:09It's so hot in here.
01:10The only form of ventilation in this room
01:13is the tiny fan you have.
01:15I'm sweating.
01:15Why are you giving the fan credit?
01:16The fan didn't make you sweat.
01:17I made you sweat, okay?
01:18Credit words to...
01:19Please stop taking everything that I'm saying
01:20and spinning it into being, like,
01:22a sexual positive.
01:23Nothing about this was positive.
01:25Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?
01:27Ce soir?
01:28Mike.
01:29Julia.
01:29You were on top for two minutes, okay?
01:31The entirety of which,
01:32you had your eyes closed
01:33and you were screaming,
01:34hold it, hold it.
01:36Where in that two-minute window
01:37would I have finished?
01:40Well, yeah, I lasted two minutes
01:41because I know your parking meter's almost up.
01:42I was doing you a favor.
01:43You'd be paying, like, a $300 fine
01:45if it wasn't for you.
01:45You finished early as a favor to me.
01:48Yeah, unless you want the parking violation, yeah.
01:50You took three breaks.
01:51You look tired.
01:52I'm a team player.
01:54I'm selfless.
01:54Okay, just listen to me for two seconds.
01:56I did not finish.
02:01Please stop pointing at me.
02:02I get it.
02:03You're afraid to be vulnerable.
02:04No.
02:04I understand the female body,
02:05there's, like, a lot going on down there,
02:06like, a lot.
02:07Some women don't even know how it works.
02:08What girls?
02:09The female body is a beautiful mystery
02:10and I, uh, cracked the code.
02:12You're not Nancy Drew.
02:13You didn't crack the code.
02:14This is not an escape room.
02:15I'm honored to be her first, so.
02:19Can I say one thing?
02:23Daddy's got your cover.
02:23You're not my dad.
02:24Papa?
02:25I don't.
02:25You want to go with daddy?
02:26You're like the estranged uncle.
02:27I'm your father.
02:28You're not.
02:29And that's okay.
02:30Anyone's dad.
02:31I hope.
02:31Let's just acknowledge our feelings
02:32instead of running away from you.
02:33I did not finish.
02:38I get it.
02:39Please stop pointing at me.
02:40Said you were a SpongeBob fan, yeah?
02:41I never said that.
02:42It's opposite day.
02:43We don't have to do the whole reverse psychology thing.
02:44Like, you think by saying,
02:45oh, I don't like you,
02:46then I'm going to, like, like you more.
02:47I'm going to call you in the morning.
02:47Let's get breakfast, Julia.
02:48I don't want to play those games.
02:49Oh, my God.
02:49I don't know how you could possibly think
02:51that any of that was enjoyable for me.
02:53I don't understand why every guy
02:55thinks that they're good at sex.
02:56You are so not good at sex.
02:58And you know what?
02:59You know what the sad part is, Mike?
03:01I was going to call you tomorrow.
03:03That is how low the bar is set.
03:05So, no.
03:06I did not get mine.
03:13You're trying to turn this into, like,
03:14a whole hate bang thing,
03:15like, high emotion.
03:16It's not what I want.
03:17But if you are, I'm down.
03:18Ready?
03:18How am I doing?
03:18How am I doing?
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