- 15 hours ago
Falling S01E05
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:19Oh, you're awake already.
00:23I smuggled an alarm clock in.
00:25We come as a pair now.
00:27Oh, poor Agnes is saddled with me.
00:30I enjoy it.
00:32Your dear's been back.
00:34Oh, is that right?
00:35You see the horse chestnut tree?
00:37There are leaves missing at the bottom of it.
00:41Then let's sit here all day.
00:44Wait until it comes back to us.
00:47Wouldn't that be nice?
00:58All right, let's go back.
01:01All right, let's go back.
01:04Let's go back to us.
01:07Let's go back to us.
01:17Let's go back to us.
01:19Let's go back to us.
01:21Let's go back to us.
01:23Let's go back to us.
01:24Let's go back to us.
01:26Let's go back to us.
01:27Let's go back to us.
01:27Let's go back to us.
01:35His ways are faithfulness and love
01:41For those who keep his covenant and will
01:47The Lord's friendship is for those who revere him
01:53And to them he reveals his covenant
01:58Father, who walks in heaven
02:08How old be thy name
02:14Right in the crown
02:21Bless me, Father, for I have sinned
02:23It's been 48 hours since my last confession
02:27How can I help?
02:29Well, I have committed four acts of blasphemy
02:33And five, no, six of self-abasement
02:37Seven, maybe, actually
02:40You've had a busy time
02:42She just talks at me, day after day
02:45Oh, Brian's left his toenails all over the floor again
02:49Brian's making a mess in the bathroom
02:52I'd love for my Alan to be making any of those messes
02:55But she doesn't even...
02:58I find myself getting so frustrated with her
03:02I can't see how you can take any wrong from finding your sister difficult
03:07It's just when I kill her that I'll be in trouble
03:09Yeah
03:10That I believe is valuable
03:13She's stronger
03:14Every day
03:17And she's using this new energy to buzz around me
03:21That's good
03:23I asked her along to these classes they do at the GP
03:26As a sort of partner
03:28And she is taking it way too seriously
03:32She keeps getting me to practice this breathing stuff
03:38And you?
03:40Are you okay?
03:44The confession was definitely not supposed to be about my feelings
03:52Dad said that you'd visited him
03:54He didn't say it in a nice way
03:56And I don't think what you said made any difference
03:59But that was kind of you
04:05It was a complicated discussion
04:09What did he say to you?
04:16He sent me a challenge
04:19Which I didn't meet
04:22Can't say any more than that
04:23I'm sorry
04:25Do you think he's gonna be okay?
04:30Do you want him to be?
04:32Yes
04:35I hope he will be
04:44Francesca said I was allowed to make it mine
04:48We had the opportunity to replant as we harvested
04:51So you made some changes in what you planted and where you planted it
04:58Quite bold, wouldn't you say?
05:00No
05:01I wasn't even half out the door
05:09Don't
05:09Don't
05:10Don't
05:10Even as a joke
05:11I like it
05:11Come on, show me the worst of it
05:15I'm planning on scallions in half the cabbage patch
05:19The other half will still have cabbages in
05:20But I like scallions
05:23And to be honest, no one likes cabbages as much as me
05:26So that's a good idea
05:28And maybe more raspberries and strawberries in your polytana
05:32Scandalous
05:33Yes
05:33I made a raspberry and rhubarb jam that people seem to like
05:36Yes, I tried it for breakfast
05:38It was delicious
05:43Was it me that made you go?
05:47Sorry?
05:48Was it how I behaved?
05:50Were you disappointed?
05:51Or was it how the abbess treated me?
05:52Were you disappointed in her?
05:53No
05:55No, it wasn't you
05:57Never you
05:58It wasn't her either
06:00Although she did annoy me
06:06Things are much better for me now
06:08With her
06:09The abbess is
06:10She likes you now
06:12I wouldn't go that far
06:14It was a man
06:16Who made me go
06:18The handsome priest
06:20Did everyone know?
06:22I saw you talking once
06:24He was as into you as you him
06:25You're wrong there
06:28I was
06:29Ridiculous
06:30I don't think so
06:31I was always good at spotting it
06:33It was my skill at school for some reason
06:36Maybe because I wasn't into boys I could read them
06:39I'd tell the girls who'd fancied who
06:41It was always very useful knowledge
06:42Must have been hugely popular
06:44I was a mad Christian Dyke witch
06:48What a combination
06:54I
06:55What the
06:56Wraida Von's laughing at me
07:00The lusty nun
07:03What a thing to be
07:07You don't know how much you'll love, do you?
07:11No one's laughing
07:12No one has laughed
07:15They're just
07:16They're delighted
07:18To have you back with us
07:20You are Anna
07:24You belong to us
07:48Can we talk?
07:51Oh
07:52Yeah, I hope to be good
07:55Awkward to air dirty pants in front of other people
07:58I hope I'm not wearing dirty pants
08:00Ah
08:02I've got that phrase wrong
08:03Dirty laundry
08:04Yes
08:05Well it's the same thing I suppose
08:07Yeah
08:10You do know that she's returned home
08:12Anna
08:15Ah
08:15Yeah
08:17Well yeah, so that just leaves you now, doesn't it?
08:23I don't know what to do with you
08:26What are your options?
08:28Well there are those who truly believe in you
08:32You tried to get rid of me and got blocked
08:35And there are others who think that you're damaged
08:37And that you might cause damage
08:39And I wasn't blocked, I consulted
08:42You know there's some priests, they
08:44They come back stronger for having been broken
08:47And that is why I was prepared to bring you here
08:51But the question is, what led to the break?
08:55People, they use words like
08:57Last and love
08:59But it is never that
09:03Vows are not discarded for such things
09:06Vows are discarded because of something here
09:11Being unresolved
09:13A fear
09:16Is this your normal tactic, your counselling?
09:20Is this a surprising amount of anger in your words?
09:24You know, you are unusual
09:29Amongst the young priests I'm priestly finding
09:31That it's all about the liturgy
09:34And the social work of priests is rare
09:37What do you think a priest should do?
09:40Bring people to God
09:41So that all may bathe in his light
09:48Not plague God
09:50Without a thought to the consequences
09:53Does that make me a conservative?
09:56Or does that make me careful with the needs of others?
10:01When we overstep, we risk them
10:04It's inappropriate
10:06It's wrong
10:07What if help is what they need?
10:09Or do we let them ask for help?
10:13Or do we tell them that they need it?
10:19David, you are so reckless
10:24We should go in
10:40In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit
10:44Thank you all for coming
10:45I do so like these meetings
10:48It is a chance for us to
10:50Affirm our success and express
10:53Doubts about our failures
10:54Now, I hope you've all been sent the agenda
10:57Let's start with the building fund
10:59We've had a good quarter
11:01So donations are high
11:03Which has allowed us
11:08I don't even know what she said
11:09I don't even know what she said
11:11I just found myself
11:15And so
11:18I jumped
11:19I'll be with her
11:20I jumped her in the throne
11:23I can slap the fingers on you now
11:25Do we let them ask for help?
11:28It's in progress
11:29Are you helping here?
11:32Playguard
11:32Without a thought
11:34To the consequences
11:34Or
11:35Bring people to God
11:40You might cause damage
11:44David
11:44So reckless
12:02Yes
12:03Black coffee
12:04Six sugars
12:06Okay
12:09It works
12:11Trust me
12:15Okay
12:18You gave us all the fright
12:23Just a stomach bug
12:24Just a stomach bug
12:25Want to talk about it?
12:28Do you want me to call your sponsor?
12:30Don't have a sponsor
12:32Just come to the meetings
12:34Not to judge
12:36But those I know
12:37Who don't have a sponsor
12:38Usually trying to avoid something
12:41They're usually being a bit
12:43Dishonest
12:44With themselves
12:48This is so kind
12:49But do you mind if I go?
12:51I'd rather you didn't
12:53I'll just say
13:21Do you mind if there's a path?
13:23That's right
13:24It's Polly. She's struggling to breathe.
14:07Mum?
14:09Oh, hello.
14:11What are you doing here?
14:12Well, I didn't want to go up there. I assumed you already had enough attention on you.
14:17So you thought you'd just hang around on the off chance?
14:19Well, it's a regular haunt, is it not?
14:21Well, I've got some deliveries to do. You could help me.
14:32You've started smoking again.
14:34Don't tell your dad.
14:37I couldn't stop thinking about what I said to you.
14:40Which bit?
14:42The cruelty stuff, or the other stuff?
14:45Or was there any other stuff?
14:47Hmm.
14:48I met a boy when I was 15.
14:51Poorly dressed.
14:52Terrible moustache.
14:54He used to walk me home from school.
14:55I was at this terrible girls' school.
14:57You told me about the girls' school.
14:59Not about this boy.
15:01He didn't talk much.
15:02He'd just mooch along beside me.
15:04I'd always be embarrassed whenever he got me in my house
15:07because my mother would watch out of the window.
15:10She liked to interfere, my mother.
15:12Hmm.
15:13Sounds familiar.
15:15Yes.
15:16But my point is, I knew he wasn't very impressive.
15:21He had good eyes.
15:22His shoulders were always hunched.
15:25He didn't know what to do with his hair.
15:26And he had an acne problem.
15:29But his being, his insides, were quite special.
15:36As was the fact that he was absolutely certain of what he felt about me.
15:42He didn't care if people laughed at him.
15:46Just was as he was.
15:48Anyway, one day my dad exploded at him.
15:52Nothing violent, but the things he said.
15:54He tore him apart.
15:56How he looked.
15:57How he spoke.
15:58What he was going to be.
16:00I can still remember most of the words.
16:02It was the worst thing that ever happened to me.
16:04Certainly the worst thing that ever happened to him.
16:06Was he okay?
16:08What happened to him?
16:09Well, I married him, of course.
16:11Spent my life with him.
16:13But it was dad.
16:15Well, I didn't mean it to be a surprise.
16:20I know I've not always been the happiest mother.
16:24Wife.
16:26I have had, have, an unhappiness of my own that I brought with me into the relationship that being with
16:34you, with Chris, hasn't resolved.
16:38But he has.
16:41When I imagine my life without him, I see only turgid blood.
16:50But why haven't either of you ever mentioned this to me before?
16:54The dad would follow you home.
16:58I was lucky.
16:59I met him when I was 15.
17:00I think I was on the verge of many mistakes.
17:05My home wasn't.
17:08I think I'd have been unhappy.
17:10Unhappier.
17:12Don't know how he feels about that.
17:14Of course, rougher end of the bargain.
17:19Well, I wasn't supposed to make you cry.
17:22Fucking hell, whatever I say makes you cry.
17:25So now you're telling me that I should believe in love.
17:27I'm telling you, you're your father's daughter.
17:30That when you know, you know.
17:33When you love, you love.
17:35I'm saying sorry.
17:38When you joined up, became Sister Anna, you ripped my heart out.
17:44And then suddenly you're on the other side and it's supposed to be okay.
17:48I was confused.
17:51But I do believe if love is what you need, then...
17:58I, er...
17:59I stopped him.
18:02Mum, I stopped him from kissing me.
18:05Oh?
18:06Why?
18:09Because he wasn't ready.
18:10Because he's a priest.
18:12Because I was bloody stupid.
18:15So let me understand.
18:17You were ready to burn your life.
18:19And he wasn't.
18:21And then he was and you turned him away.
18:24Yes, exactly.
18:25But he kissed you.
18:26It was a mistake.
18:27So you ran away back here.
18:30Interesting.
18:31First time I've known you a coward.
18:38I came here to be nice.
18:41I can't do nice.
18:43I'm sorry.
18:45I do love you.
18:48I do love you.
18:56What have you done there, son David?
18:59This is serious and worrying behaviour.
19:03This could be a police matter.
19:06David hit a boy in the throat.
19:09With a dinner tray.
19:11I wasn't trying to.
19:12Dave, he asked you to be quiet.
19:14I was trying to get away from him.
19:15Are you helping here?
19:16David is a dangerously disruptive presence here.
19:23Forgive me, father.
19:24Forgive me, father.
19:25For I have sinned.
19:28Those are the right words.
19:31They always told me I didn't have to come here, but...
19:35I...
19:36You're just interested in how it works.
19:40Or...
19:41Have you something...
19:43You want to talk to me about?
19:44I'm not sure.
19:46The way this works is...
19:49You tell me what's troubling you.
19:51I listen.
19:54And then...
19:55I give you a prayer or something to perform.
19:59So...
20:00Whatever mistakes you've made.
20:02And...
20:03We all make mistakes.
20:06God can...
20:07Set you on a journey of...
20:12Correction.
20:12I hate them.
20:14Who do you hate?
20:17Everyone.
20:18I don't like anyone. I hate them all.
20:24Your...
20:25Your parents?
20:26They're not my parents.
20:29They're good people.
20:31I just hate them.
20:34It's hate a sin.
20:38Most hate is temporary. It's passion.
20:41And so it can be challenged.
20:43It can be changed.
20:46I don't understand.
20:48Everyone talks about God's love.
20:52God loves you.
20:53God loves everyone.
20:56But you know the best thing about God's love?
20:58He wants to love you.
21:01He wants you to love yourself.
21:04And to love him back.
21:06And maybe...
21:08If you can do that...
21:11Maybe...
21:12You can find infinite love for others.
21:16Now wouldn't that be beautiful?
21:31I'm afraid to tell you that sister Polly Everon died three hours ago.
21:36I am so sorry for all our loss.
21:41Polly was here longer than any of us.
21:43She found great comfort here.
21:46God...
21:46Here.
21:49The last thing she asked me, and she was very weak, unable to say much...
21:54Was that she be buried in the convent.
21:58We have never had that before, but having looked into the matter, she had no other surviving family.
22:04So if not here, I'm not quite sure where else to put her.
22:10I also think...
22:13I would like a trace of her left with us.
22:17I would like her to remain a part of how we live.
22:21I've spent my life here looking up to her.
22:24For that and many reasons.
22:27A prayer for her.
22:32Dear Lord, we thank you for our sister Polly.
22:37We thank you for her goodness and her grace.
22:41Her certainty.
22:42And her spirit.
22:45We hope she will find a way to serve you in the next life as well as she has in
22:49this one.
22:51We loved her.
22:54Amen.
23:37Thanks, man.
23:40What the...
23:42What the...
23:44I'm gonna have it.
24:04Lots of darkness.
24:13But you're always a bad thing.
24:15you know.
24:17Shhh!
24:20Your life...
24:22I...
24:22...is different.
24:25Everyone...
24:26...w mod...
24:26I see you, who you are.
24:30The one I think matters.
24:32You know, you're a good man.
24:37My parents are super powerful.
24:42The best of finances hurt for you.
24:49That's how I do.
24:50I'm going to shoot my choir.
24:57And I've been here much more to work.
25:05Maybe try to do it.
25:10I don't know.
25:12I don't know.
25:15I'm going to say about her.
25:20She's a his daughter.
25:22She's a baby.
25:28I see her.
25:34She's a baby.
25:37She's a baby.
25:39She's a child.
25:41I'm a child...
25:42She doesn't
25:43It's good.
25:45She's a baby.
25:48She wears...
25:50Shhh.
25:59You lost your time.
26:02Shhh.
26:02Shhh.
26:03Right.
26:05Ah.
26:12I don't think you want me to touch that.
26:35They who dwell at the ends of the earth stand in awe of your signs.
26:40You make the dawn and the sunset shout for joy.
26:46Psalms, chapter 65, verse 8.
26:51Very good.
26:58It wasn't a man for me.
27:01Or a woman, I should say.
27:03Modernity, etc.
27:06The absence of that was never a problem for me.
27:10But there were six months after I turned 50 when I couldn't understand the lack of devotion
27:16of those coming in.
27:18Six months.
27:20It was probably three years.
27:23You'd been with us 15 years or so by then and I looked at you and I thought, maybe the
27:28time has come for me to take this all off.
27:32To let you take over.
27:34Maybe I'd like to escape away.
27:38My family have a small farm in Donegal and my brother would make me very welcome.
27:44My point is, it's such a strange gift we're given.
27:49The certainty of a marriage without all that comes with that.
27:53Polly found it effortlessly.
27:55I don't think she ever doubted her journey.
27:57But most, most of us have moments of struggle.
28:07Is this you telling me that you forgive me for leaving?
28:12I still think about Donegal.
28:16As abbess, you are both my children and my sisters and I sometimes, when I'm in pain
28:24as I am today, I sometimes wish I could just escape.
28:27But I don't.
28:30I stay and I try.
28:33Out there is no escape.
28:37I know.
28:39But you do understand, Anna, outside is hard.
28:43But this isn't a sanctuary from that.
28:46Both are work.
28:48Both have to be work.
28:54I am sorry.
29:00To the house.
29:19Hello?
29:24Hello.
29:27Hello, I'm...
29:29I know who you are.
29:32I didn't want to go into the convent.
29:37You don't want to face the abbess.
29:40You hope to find Sister Anna round the back instead.
29:46It's not quite that.
29:47She's just finding her peace again.
29:50And you want to disturb it.
29:53Which ones see her? Talk to her.
29:55For her own good, or for yours.
29:59We love her here.
30:01She loves being here.
30:05Don't disrupt her again.
30:07She's not as strong as you think.
30:10Go home.
30:13Please.
30:24You're the one.
30:28Go home.
30:35You have to save her.
30:36You are forever with her.
30:36I'm sorry.
31:03Oh, my God.
31:17Can I have a wall plug, please?
31:20A what?
31:21Wall plug.
31:22It's a white plastic thing.
31:23Looks like the head of an arrow.
31:26Yep.
31:27Doesn't look like an arrow.
31:29And yet you still knew what it meant.
31:34Is it ready?
31:37No.
31:39When will I know you haven't broken everything?
31:41Haven't you got homework?
31:42You need my help here.
31:48It's finished.
31:55Oh, this tuna pasta.
31:58You're welcome to stay for dinner.
32:01Oh, um, I better get back.
32:06Good decision.
32:07That'll probably be horrible.
32:09I'm trying to sneak fish into everything and ruin everything.
32:13Most days she gives up and just eats crisps.
32:18Well, that's a well done for trying to smile.
32:21Just to let you know I hate that smile.
32:23Sorry.
32:24I know that smile too.
32:29When he saw you, are you allowed to see what he asked for?
32:37I think it's a good idea to show.
32:41I still think about him.
32:46Not always in a bad way.
32:51Does that make me shit?
32:53No.
32:56Serenity feels like a long way away.
33:00I don't know if you know, I've also had addiction issues.
33:06Yeah.
33:07Phil told me.
33:09Alcohol.
33:10Phil told me that too.
33:13I just wanted to say, if I do need to talk to someone,
33:18yeah, the sign of the cross bit isn't so important that I can't talk to you as a human.
33:23Do you?
33:24It's kind.
33:25I've got a sponsor.
33:27But that's kind.
33:29I find the meetings really useful, but the sponsors weren't ever really for me.
33:35Because the ones that want to fix don't like to be fixed.
33:38I've seen your type before.
33:42You've seen me before too, I'm sure.
33:45A few people in similar places.
33:49Do they do okay?
33:53They come out the other side?
33:57Yeah.
33:59They did.
34:01You want to ask about the ones like you?
34:05Ask if they sorted themselves out?
34:08Yeah.
34:11Well, one did.
34:14One did it.
34:17See, I was a lot more honest than you then, wasn't I?
34:23Sure, you won't stay for dinner?
34:25Yeah.
34:29Thank you for the stair thing.
34:34I hope you make it through.
34:37You're one of the good ones.
34:41I think you're one of the good ones, too.
34:45I think we'll both make it.
34:47Say, bye.
34:50Bye.
34:55Bye.
34:57Bye.
35:03Bye.
35:06Bye.
35:12Bye.
35:33Almighty, ever-living God,
35:35you rule both the living and the dead
35:38and are merciful to you.
35:41We humbly beseech you
35:43that those for whom we pour out our prayers
35:47may obtain pardon for their sins
35:50through your tender mercy.
35:55Amen.
36:11Do you find this place to be a sanctuary, Vinpe?
36:14I do.
36:16But you work hard at what it requires of you.
36:20Faith is hard.
36:21No, I'm not talking about faith.
36:23I'm talking about...
36:27If I hadn't found a way for them to let you stay,
36:30would it have been easier if they'd just thrown you out?
36:36I'm grateful you didn't let them do that.
36:38Why?
36:38Well, what...
36:41What do you find here?
36:44Belonging.
36:46And...
36:48And sometimes that peace you talked of.
36:51Peace.
36:53Belonging.
36:57Good.
37:22You knew, didn't you?
37:23The...
37:25Sanctuary comment was you, guiding me.
37:30I am a guide.
37:34You knew I didn't fit here anymore.
37:38I did not.
37:40But...
37:41I just wanted you to think how this made you feel.
37:45How being here again made you feel.
37:48I want it to be home.
37:52But it's not.
37:55I think...
37:58I feel that staying here would be cowardice.
38:07This...
38:09This...
38:09This...
38:10This just isn't the life for me anymore.
38:13Do you know what you will do?
38:15No.
38:18You're going to him.
38:21No.
38:24It's not about that.
38:26I'm not sure it was ever about that.
38:32I have to...
38:33I have to find...
38:35A new answer.
38:39A new peace.
38:42A new peace.
38:45You are not a coward, Anna.
38:48No.
38:50I'm a...
38:53An unemployed, largely uneducated, middle-aged woman.
38:58But I do know a huge amount about the Bible.
39:05I have loved sharing your home.
39:09God's home.
39:12And I...
39:13I do love God.
39:16I know.
39:20The last time I...
39:22I left in panic.
39:26But this time...
39:28This time...
39:30I mean it.
39:30But...
39:37I have loved you.
39:43I have loved you.
39:48And I have felt your love.
39:52And I hope you have felt mine.
39:59A new life.
40:19I have loved you.
40:23That's right.
40:23I don't know.
40:58I don't know.
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