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00:26Oh, it's got me.
00:41Good morning, it's just got 8 o'clock.
00:47Oh, hello.
00:48They didn't say that you were, uh...
00:50Oh, yeah, sorry.
00:52None of my forms.
00:54Catholic?
00:55Now, I've got to say, I haven't been to Confession in close to ten years now.
01:01Sadly, you're totally damned.
01:03Unless you can fix my car, that is.
01:32Anna?
01:34Sister Anna, we've a visitor needs feeding.
01:49The End
02:09I'd like to bring a few girls from my choir for a visit.
02:12How old, darling?
02:13Fourteen to seventeen, mostly still in education.
02:17Devoted?
02:18Some are finding their path.
02:19Any dependents?
02:21Sorry?
02:23Sister, good.
02:25Father Hicks has travelled a long way.
02:28Uh, only an hour and a half.
02:30I was late because my car decided to explode when I was halfway here.
02:34Oh, how dramatic.
02:36Yeah, I had a burst, something.
02:38Which means a longer bus ride home.
02:40You need to eat.
02:41No, it's not a problem.
02:42I can just get a snack from the shop on the way.
02:45Sister Anna can do better than a scotch egg from a newsagent.
02:49She sets the bar so high.
02:50Since she took over the kitchen, all of us have put on weight.
02:53Something simple?
02:55Uh, yeah, yeah.
02:56But don't put yourself out.
02:58Scrambled eggs?
02:59Some bread?
03:00Maybe sure.
03:02That's two thank yous, which is one too many.
03:04Good.
03:05Yes, no dependents.
03:07If the girls have children...
03:08Even for a visit?
03:10The visit is to see whether they might fit, no?
03:14We are not here to be watched.
03:16We are here to be joined.
03:18No number of children.
03:20Or romantic entanglements.
03:22You want me to give them a quiz?
03:24Is that too hard a question to answer?
03:27Um...
03:28Then let us agree a date.
03:30I've heard you a diary.
03:34You're new to the kitchen?
03:36Uh, no, it's been 11 years, I think.
03:41Time passes slowly here.
03:44Been outside?
03:46Uh, yes, yes, bulbing for the new season.
03:49What are you growing?
03:50Children.
03:52Tiny, tiny little children in the middle of the flowers,
03:55which we pluck in May, we dry them through the summer,
03:58and then we eat them in September.
04:04Uh, kale, lettuce, spinach, garlic.
04:08My cabbages are legendary.
04:10I don't like cabbage.
04:12Well, then I judge you for that.
04:1711 years.
04:19It's been a long while.
04:20It's been over 20 since I took my vows.
04:25And you?
04:26Where are you?
04:27Uh, Bristol, Easton.
04:30What do you grow in Easton?
04:32Ha.
04:34Um, currently expending a lot of energy
04:37trying to get the needle exchange opened, and...
04:40Oh, a basketball hoop in the local bar.
04:42They sound like good things to be doing.
04:45Frustrating.
04:47And I'm trying to convince people
04:49to run a harvest festival out of the church.
04:58I can't know whether the girls are in relationships.
05:03It would be inappropriate to ask.
05:06And I can't be involved in any duplicity against the abbess.
05:12You'll find a way.
05:13I fail to see how...
05:14You should have talked to her about this.
05:16I'm sorry if I'm being...
05:17It's the rules she set.
05:18It's my job.
05:19To protect all of them.
05:21It'll mean we can't come.
05:22Well, then don't come.
05:26Ow!
05:28Uh, cold water.
05:38You won't call too badly.
05:42Oh.
05:44Sorry.
05:48No, no, I, uh...
05:53I should say thank you.
05:57I'm sorry if I, um...
06:00If that was the wrong thing to do.
06:03Sorry.
06:04No.
06:07And that's, uh...
06:09Well, that's two thank yous, which is one too many.
06:19Uh, no, let me do that.
06:20No.
06:21No, no, no.
06:21Just sit down.
06:22No, no, please.
06:23No, just tell me where...
06:36This looks beautiful.
06:40Just some eggs.
06:42Uh, bless us, O Lord.
06:46Uh, and these your gift, for these your gifts, which we are about to receive from your bounty,
06:51and from the gracious work of your servant, Sister Anna.
06:56Through Christ our Lord.
06:57Amen.
06:58Amen.
07:04I, I don't like the word servant.
07:08I don't like it either.
07:15There's been an accident.
07:39There's been an accident.
07:40I, I don't like it either.
08:09I, I don't like it.
08:09I, I don't like it.
08:16The End
08:17Morning, Sister.
08:17May the Lord bless this day.
08:20Yes.
08:22And if he could arrange for it not to rain so the polytunnel doesn't get swamped again, I'd really appreciate
08:27it.
08:42PHONE RINGS
08:50Molly, tell Mum Uncle David's in the bathroom.
08:53What, am I not allowed?
08:54Mum put in a rota.
08:55I didn't see a rota.
08:57Jesus.
08:58Bad reasons.
09:00I lost you to jeans.
09:01No.
09:02It's not hard to just switch it off.
09:04I can't even hear what she's saying.
09:05I can't even hear what she's saying.
09:07No, I asked you.
09:12It's not hard to just switch it off.
09:14I know, but I can't even hear what she's saying.
09:17Sorry.
09:29Oh, these are lovely.
09:31You are lovely, Graeme.
09:32These are vegetables.
09:35Morning.
09:36Morning.
09:37They've put up the price of dahlias again.
09:40Bastards think we're a soft touch.
09:43You're the host, or am I?
09:44Oh, you know I don't like hosts.
09:47Father Christie agreed with me as considerably more oral thrush around than they used to be.
09:56Do you think it's okay for the abbess for the trip to ask that I only bring girls who aren't
10:03in relationships?
10:06Yes.
10:07Do.
10:09Not small-minded to me.
10:12I am small-minded both by profession and inclination.
10:18How's your mother?
10:19Smiling on.
10:22Tina's back.
10:24Is she?
10:26She's with her dad.
10:31In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
10:36Amen.
10:37The Lord be with you.
10:40And with the Spirit.
10:43Lord, we have sinned against you.
10:45Lord, have mercy.
10:47Lord, have mercy.
10:49Show us your mercy and your love.
10:52And grant us your salvation.
10:57May almighty God have mercy on us, forgive us our sins, and bring us into everlasting life.
11:05Amen.
11:06Amen.
11:07Shall we start with a hymn?
11:20Bless me, Father, because I have sinned.
11:22It's been 24 hours since my last confession.
11:26I remember.
11:28During which I have committed three acts of blasphemy and two of self-abasement.
11:37I mean masturbation, Father.
11:42Of course you do.
11:44I don't mean to hurt people.
11:50But I do.
11:51I think you've been very hard on yourself.
11:56I am vile.
11:58You're not.
12:02You're not.
12:20Are you going to invite me in or are you going to leave a lady on the doorstep?
12:23Oh, you're a daft one.
12:26Do you wish to say anything?
12:30No.
12:33Do you need absolution?
12:36Yes.
12:44How was it?
12:46Well, half the kids look as if they've got malnutrition and half the adults jaundice.
12:51The best just seem depressed.
12:53We'll pray for them.
12:55And help as best we can.
12:57Has the school group arrived?
12:59Yeah.
13:00Important, I'm told, by the prioress.
13:02For them to see us.
13:03For the recruitment push.
13:05Does make one feel one is in a zoo, rather.
13:09Time for a whiskey.
13:10I got sent a rather fine maud by the bishop.
13:13Might chase away some of the feelings of the day.
13:15He shouldn't encourage you.
13:17It's because he wants you to make him some whiskey marmalade.
13:21Well, I can try.
13:22I told him you're not a takeaway.
13:23He'll take what he's given.
13:25Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
13:27It's been three weeks since my last confession.
13:31How have you been?
13:34I'm okay.
13:39You know, I'm supposed to pretend I never know who's on the other side of this.
13:45I took a trip to the convent, the Womack.
13:49Gonna take some members of the girls' choir.
13:51And I'd like to ask your mum if you'd like to join it.
13:55The trip.
13:56Thanks.
13:58Is that what you want?
14:01With...
14:01Yeah.
14:03Yeah.
14:07Then...
14:08Maybe I'll come around the house.
14:11Talk to her.
14:16He's out most evenings.
14:19At the restaurant.
14:20He's out.
14:24He's out.
14:27He's out.
14:29He's out.
14:31He's out.
14:32He's out.
14:33Hi, Biancas.
14:33Father Hicks.
14:35I'd hoped to talk to you about Tina.
14:37She said tonight might be a good night to come over.
14:58Tina!
14:59Tina!
15:02I'll go on what you got.
15:04Do you need help?
15:05There are things I can do to...
15:07You can leave if you're gonna be trying that.
15:08Tina!
15:13Um...
15:14How do you feel about Tina making the decision to lead a consecrated life?
15:19I think she's a kid who doesn't know which way's up.
15:27Did you grow up a Catholic, Bianca?
15:31Why is he asking all the questions to me?
15:33You're the adult.
15:34He wants to check you're okay.
15:37So who wants to hide in a convent for a life?
15:40Uh...
15:41I don't think it's siding.
15:43But I...
15:44I do understand why commitment, faith, feels a strange thing in this world.
15:50The amount of people that ask me things like,
15:51how old do you have to wear it all the time?
15:53Do you never have sex?
15:56He's trying to shock us now.
15:57The priest talking about sex.
16:00And I do think celibacy is an important part of Tina's commitments,
16:03but it's not the most important part.
16:05Marx is always quoted as saying,
16:08religion is the opium of the masses.
16:10What he actually said was,
16:12religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature,
16:15the heart of a heartless world and the soul of soulless conditions.
16:20It is the opium of the people.
16:23I don't go to church, can't stand the dither of it all.
16:26Dither?
16:28Well, it seems to me the Bible says do good, then we'll do it.
16:31Stop dithering about with incense and myrrh.
16:33Mum.
16:35I think you're right about the dither.
16:38But...
16:38I think what Marx was saying is that the church,
16:41by venerating virtue, does something quite important.
16:44And...
16:45I think, right now,
16:47society needs that virtue.
16:50Look, she says she wanted it.
16:51She goes.
16:53Good.
16:55Then, I'd like to take you, Tina,
16:58with a few other girls to visit Wormack.
17:01I think that by visiting there,
17:03she'll get much better sense of whether that's what she needs.
17:13Um...
17:13Should I talk to Phil?
17:15No.
17:17Well, that's everything, Father Hicks.
17:19And, yes.
17:21Oh no, I'm kidding...
17:25Oh, no, I'm not kidding.
17:29Oh no, I'm not kidding.
18:01It's not easy when we lose track of ourselves
18:05to find our way back.
18:09Can I ask, why did you feel you needed your phone?
18:15I don't know.
18:18My parents were horrified and I said I wanted to be a nun.
18:24My mum said I was throwing myself away.
18:29She thought it was over some bore hill.
18:31Was there a boy?
18:35No.
18:38You?
18:40No, a boy.
18:45It's not my friend, Susie.
18:52Is that okay?
18:55With me?
18:57Yes.
18:59With God?
19:01I would hope so.
19:04With you?
19:12Do you want to stay?
19:16Do you want me to stay?
19:22Oh, Empe.
19:25If there is one choice that has to be yours, it is this.
19:31Do you ever doubt your choice?
19:39Faith is dependent on doubt.
19:44Without doubt, there is no faith.
19:47What?
20:03Rebellion, Rebellion, Rebellion, Campaign on Glow,
20:06You've got one.
20:07We don't mind
20:07The story is saying,
20:16I'm going through to wearEvet.
20:45The End
20:54She seems much better this morning
20:57Good
21:00So I've prayed upon it and decided I have no choice but to ask her to leave
21:06No, you can't
21:07When someone is a postulant
21:10But she's been with us for over a year
21:14When someone is a postulant, they are here to be judged by us and by themselves
21:18As to whether they can find the patience and love to belong
21:21It's one mistake
21:22A crucial one
21:24I devote myself to God in every way
21:27I isolate myself and give myself to prayer
21:30But I do want to keep checking social media for what my friends are up to
21:33May I speak?
21:36I have been guiding her
21:38And I don't think you understand
21:39She is a genuine, kind
21:42Good
21:42My role in this convent is to make the decisions others won't
21:46It's to lead
21:47Your role is not to abandon the poor girl
21:50Francesca, please
21:51No, no
21:51You do not use that name, my name, in anger
21:55It is not a weapon
22:00I apologise, abbess
22:08Our commitment cannot be predicated on a lie
22:11She vowed to put away everything from her other life
22:14She couldn't
22:15She lied
22:16To her sisters and to God
22:18She made a vow
22:20And she broke it
22:21She was weak
22:22Yes
22:24But these young people, they are growing up in an unforgiving world
22:29Perhaps our commitment might take them a little bit longer to learn
22:34Please
22:36Please, give her a chance to find her path
22:52She remains a postulant for at least another year
22:55She has to prove herself all over again, yes?
22:58Yes
23:00Thank you
23:01She's lucky to have you
23:05Okay
23:08There will be a time when I am ready to take quieter duties here
23:15I believe you are the right person to succeed me
23:18But if you do, you may discover that these decisions are harder than they might appear
23:34Mr. Wonderful Deanery meeting last night
23:37Falling congregations since Covid
23:40How to get people back believing
23:42Anyone suggest another Covid?
23:45Make him beg before the incoming flood
23:47Don't forget the accounts need your sign off
23:51The bishop needs to know precisely what we've got
23:54To set terms for the underfloor heating brigade
23:57Francis, could you run this morning for me?
23:59Sorry?
24:01I just realised I've got some pressing pieces
24:03Could you leave the master's morning for me?
24:05Mm-hmm
24:25Bless me, Father, for I have sinned
24:27It's been four days since my last confession
24:33I've been angry with others, impatient
24:37I shouted at the abbess
24:41I was cruel to Sister Justine when she needed support
24:49And I have been having immoral thoughts
24:56Lust
25:04You have to say something to that, Father Clary
25:06You can't leave me on my own without one
25:10Go on
25:13Go on
25:14Go on
25:17What does that mean?
25:20It means go on
25:29It's not like I haven't had thoughts before
25:34I have struggled at times with feelings of desire
25:41But this time
25:42Well, these times
25:46These feelings, they're so specific
25:56And that's all I can say
25:59Really
25:59I am ashamed
26:01And I'm confused
26:04Confused
26:04Mainly
26:10Three Hail Marys
26:17Yes, Father
26:20And be careful
26:29God, the Father of mercies
26:31Through the death and resurrection of his Son
26:33Has reconciled the world to himself
26:35And sent the Holy Spirit
26:36For the forgiveness of our sins
26:39Through the ministry of the Church
26:41May God give you pardon and peace
26:43And I absolve you from your sins
26:45In the name of the Father
26:47And of the Son
26:48And of the Holy Spirit
26:50Amen
26:50I love you.
27:46Hello.
27:47Ah.
27:48This is a surprise.
27:51I just thought I'd, um, I'd come back to talk to the abbess.
27:56Felt like I'd left a few of her concerns on the table.
28:00Right.
28:02I was hoping for more beautiful eggs, of course.
28:05I knew you were the pushy sort.
28:09May I see your cabbages?
28:12Only if you get me really drunk.
28:20Are you that nervous of me, abbess, that you'd look around a boring garden to avoid it?
28:24Boring garden? Doubt is that.
28:27No.
28:30But why are you here?
28:36Uh, can I tell you about a girl I'd like to bring you here?
28:39You can tell me about anything you like, but I am no use with the abbess.
28:43Um, her mother, the girl's mother is being hit by the father.
28:52I think it's possible the girl's been hit too.
28:54I raise it with social services.
28:56I raise it with the diocese safeguarding unit.
28:58But they both do something.
29:01But nothing ever happens.
29:06Sorry, you're not interested in...
29:08What is it you're doubting?
29:10Sorry?
29:11Your ability to deal with it, her response to it, or what else it is that you should be doing
29:16to help it.
29:17Uh, you're remarkably frank.
29:26Why are you looking at me like that?
29:29I just wish I had your conviction.
29:32You have certainty.
29:35I mean, it's a good thing.
29:36I haven't been certain about anything since 2001.
29:40What happened then?
29:42I became a nun.
29:50Well, here are my cabbages.
29:54They're beautiful.
29:56You like that word.
29:57Although these might actually be beautiful.
30:00How do you keep the slugs away?
30:01They're gone underneath.
30:04They don't like eggshells.
30:06Cuts them up.
30:07Uh-huh.
30:11Helping the girl.
30:12And your needle exchange is no hopes.
30:15It's impressive.
30:17I don't feel impressive.
30:19And here was I thinking you were trying to impress me.
30:27I, um...
30:28I struggle.
30:29I fail.
30:31I intervene when I shouldn't.
30:33I...
30:33You're a click of the fingers, Christian.
30:36I'm sorry?
30:37You want everything sold in a click of the fingers, and if it isn't, then it costs you.
30:43You have a brutal way of describing things.
30:46But I'm sure you're right.
30:48No.
30:48No, I admire click of the fingers, Christians.
30:52They see a problem, and they try to solve it.
30:57I'm about as far from a click of the fingers, Christian, as you can get.
31:01But you followed your conviction to live a consecrated life.
31:08Yes.
31:10Well, this has become my home.
31:13For better or worse.
31:16Make it sound like you're not happy here.
31:22It's a good thing, what you're doing.
31:26And I'm sorry, conviction is another word I don't like.
31:30I'll fetch the abbess.
31:34You know, you asked us to make an appointment before coming here.
31:37We are enclosed.
31:40I can find the abbess, please.
31:42Get on with your duties.
31:44I...
31:47I shouldn't have disturbed you.
31:48I'm sorry.
32:06I'm sorry.
32:11I'm sorry.
32:20I'm sorry.
32:52CHOIR SINGS
33:08Father Hicks! Father!
33:14You're, uh... You're leaving already?
33:17Oh, uh, well, you were right. The abbess told me to make an appointment.
33:22She's, um... She's quite formidable.
33:26You all are.
33:30I, uh, I didn't mean to... To be cruel before.
33:35Uh, no, you weren't.
33:37Brutal. Cruel.
33:39Oh. I... I didn't mean... When I used that word, I didn't mean...
33:44Yes, I... I just thought, uh, thank you for sharing your struggles with me.
33:51I... I didn't mean to be dismissive.
33:52Sister, you... You've done nothing wrong.
33:58Anna. Call me Anna.
34:02David.
34:08The girl whose... Whose mother's being hurt.
34:14Maybe... Maybe she could find peace here, but here is not the only peace.
34:21Particularly if she's leaving her mother behind.
34:23But... We are not a refuge.
34:25It doesn't work.
34:27If we're a refuge.
34:29And...
34:30And we can't save her for you.
34:33No.
34:37We've devoted...
34:38We devote ourselves to something better.
34:42And I... I think the question we all have to ask ourselves, David, is...
34:49Is if we've done something right.
34:52If we've listened to our hearts and we've done something right.
35:00You should have been a preacher.
35:04They're laughing at me.
35:08I don't think I ever would have laughed at you.
35:11I know.
35:18I, um...
35:20Must get to church.
35:24Bye.
35:29Bye.
36:07Morning.
36:08Do you mind if you stay away from my daughter?
36:11Do you mind if you stay away from my daughter?
36:11I want to source spiritual guidance.
36:12I can't...
36:13Yeah, well, just stay the fuck away.
36:14Yeah, big man.
36:17A bit early in the morning for a drink, isn't it?
36:20Phil?
36:24Stealing kids off the poor, is that what you do?
36:27Just take them, stick them in a fucking castle and throw away the key?
36:35Look, why don't we go inside and talk about this properly?
36:38I do recognize your teen is a spiritual guide, too, so...
36:49Do not tell me, or my daughter, or my fucking wife, what's right.
36:57Never know, fuck.
37:14Oh, I'm sorry, sister.
37:16I was just going to wake you, and then I caught sight of this fawn.
37:22Well, I'm sure you want them chased away before they eat your vegetables.
37:28No, no, my garden's well protected.
37:30We had a deer that used to come right up to the windows.
37:34Must be 40.
37:35No, 60 years ago.
37:38Would you feed it?
37:39Well, that one's tried to stroke its nose.
37:43It didn't like that.
37:46I was scared it wouldn't come back.
37:49But it did.
37:51And then, it didn't.
37:56I always worried.
37:58Perhaps someone took advantage of his innocence and killed it.
38:04I did miss it.
38:08Have you really been here for 60 years, Polly?
38:1274.
38:13I came when I was 16.
38:16A wonderful life.
38:22I'm pleased you've stood in defence of Bimpe.
38:25I think she has what it takes.
38:28I really do.
38:30I haven't thought of it.
38:46.com I've
38:47been here for the next day. We've
38:56all been here for sale. I've
38:57been here for now, and I've been here for a long time. I've
38:57been there for 20 years.
39:26BIRDS CHIRP
39:56BIRDS CHIRP
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44:22BIRDS CHIRP
44:25BIRDS CHIRP
44:29to act on when, when you touch my hand.
44:40And I, I believe I should listen to my inner truth.
44:47And I, I believe, I believe that I have never felt the way that you make me feel.
45:12Does, does the convent know you're here?
45:18Anna, does, does the convent know you're here?
45:23Oh, but, I think they've probably worked it out by now.
45:27And, and you intend to...
45:31Yes.
45:35Why?
45:39Simply because I touched your hand.
45:43Because you felt feelings for me.
45:49Well, there was nothing simple about it.
45:53I, uh, I thought you felt the same, same sort of feelings.
46:13I'm so sorry.
46:20But you, but you came back.
46:24You, you came back to the Womack, didn't you?
46:26I'm so sorry if I presented, if, um, I made you feel, think.
46:37I can, um, there, uh, there, there's someone here can, can drive, he, uh, you, uh, Muriel, she's, she's a
46:46parishioner, she volunteers in a cafe here.
46:48Yes, she's, she's nice, and I know she has a car.
46:51And, uh, you're suggesting I go back?
46:56I don't know what to suggest.
47:00You're, you're saying that I read something that isn't there.
47:12Uh, um, no.
47:19No, I, I won't be going back.
47:25Where would you stay?
47:27I didn't come here to talk to you about my accommodation.
47:30Have you, have you any money?
47:32No.
47:33Uh, but I...
47:40Um...
47:42I'm, I'm really sorry.
47:44Yeah.
47:45So you said.
47:47Yeah.
47:58Do it.
47:59Oh, I can't...
48:01Oh, I can't...
48:02I can't.
48:04Oh, I can't...
48:06Oh, I can't.
48:10Oh, I can't go.
48:11Oh, no.
48:12Oh, God.
48:17No, no.
48:21No.
48:22No.
48:22No.
48:23No.
48:24No.
48:25No.
48:29That's right.
48:36Yes.
48:38Yes, I will need somewhere to stay.
49:11Yeah, I will need a life escrito.
49:14For more information, visit www.fema.org
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