- 2 days ago
Embark on a delightful and witty cinematic voyage in this charming mid-century social comedy. This high-quality, full movie features a fantastic lead performance by Monty Woolley, alongside a stellar ensemble cast including Thelma Ritter, David Wayne, and a memorable early career appearance by Marilyn Monroe. Brimming with atmospheric post-war optimism, sharp satire on corporate bureaucracy, and a heartwarming message about the timeless value of experience, this feel-good classic is now free to watch for all fans of classic cinema who know that age is nothing but a state of mind.
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:19You make me feel so young, you make me feel so spring has sprung,
00:00:25and every time I see you grin, I'm shocked, a happy individual.
00:00:32You make me feel so young as a bird in the springtime,
00:00:35you make me feel there are songs to be sung,
00:00:38felt to be rung, and a wonderful thing to be sung.
00:00:44You make me feel so just like a kid again,
00:00:48like I did when spring has just begun,
00:00:52and even when I'm old and gray,
00:00:55I'm gonna feel the way I do today,
00:00:59cause you make me feel so gay,
00:01:03so gay, so young.
00:01:05I love you.
00:01:48Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:01:53What a patron of the arts.
00:02:09Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:02:17Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:02:19Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:02:22Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:02:25Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:02:55Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:02:57Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:02:58Get a load of the boss, will you?
00:03:02Grandpa!
00:03:03Grandpa!
00:03:04Ah, good evening, Alice.
00:03:05Gee, Mr. Hodges, you were swell.
00:03:07Thank you, my boy.
00:03:08Why didn't you tell us you were gonna play a solo?
00:03:09Boy, when you stood up at that big orchestra and gave me goose pimples all over just knowing you.
00:03:13Really?
00:03:14Well, it's nice of you to say so.
00:03:15And all that applause.
00:03:16Very gratifying.
00:03:17What did the maestro think?
00:03:19He seemed impressed.
00:03:21Funny, he didn't look so happy to me the way he kept looking around.
00:03:24Oh, why should he have been happy?
00:03:25Grandpa stole the show, didn't he?
00:03:27I'll say.
00:03:27And with nothing but a little old piccolo, too.
00:03:30You wanna drive home with us, Grandpa?
00:03:31No, thank you.
00:03:32I prefer to stretch my legs.
00:03:33Oh, come on, Grandpa.
00:03:35We won't be doing anything up front except a little necking.
00:03:37Maybe you could pick up a few pointers.
00:03:39Young man, it may interest you to know that when I retired from that field some years ago,
00:03:44necking became a lost art.
00:03:47Good night.
00:03:48Good night.
00:03:54What'd I got?
00:03:55Now I understand why Grandma used to have that awfully pleased look on her face.
00:04:00Yeah, maybe, but times have changed.
00:04:03It takes more than that to make a go of marriage today.
00:04:05Like, for instance?
00:04:06Like dough, for instance, you dough.
00:04:08Yes, I know.
00:04:09You have a theory.
00:04:10It's not a theory.
00:04:11It's facts.
00:04:12I've pointed out...
00:04:13All right, Joe.
00:04:14All right.
00:04:15So we don't get married.
00:04:17Not until I'm in a financial condition to support a wife.
00:04:20How?
00:04:21In a comfortable wheelchair?
00:04:22Sure, if it takes that long.
00:04:26I could keep my job.
00:04:28Lots of girls do.
00:04:29My dear girl, as I've pointed out before,
00:04:32this world happens to be run on certain economic principles.
00:04:34But, Joe...
00:04:35Unless and until a man can take care of his own wife,
00:04:37how can he possibly succeed in the broader world of finance?
00:04:40World of finance.
00:04:42World of finance.
00:04:42World of finance.
00:04:42Who cares about that?
00:04:44I want to get married.
00:04:45Can't you understand that?
00:04:47M-A-R-R-I-E-D.
00:04:50Just the same.
00:04:51We're not getting married until I'm assistant head of the personnel department.
00:04:55Oh, you...
00:04:56You economic pig head.
00:04:59Good night.
00:05:00Hey, where are you going?
00:05:02Anywhere you're not.
00:05:03All right, go ahead, walk.
00:05:07Let's see if I care.
00:05:15you know i'm right about not getting married now don't you grandpa
00:05:18young man kindly do not address me by that loathsome word grandpa
00:05:22i am not your paternal ancestor and judging through alice's remarks last night
00:05:26i'm not likely to be anytime soon even by indirection
00:05:34hello my boy you want my candid opinion i don't believe the biological urge
00:05:39from which you both appear to be suffering so acutely
00:05:42gives a hoot whether you're assistant head of personnel or not
00:05:54morning dick my boy good morning john
00:06:07hodges john
00:06:13holster is robert h
00:06:17no no by the eternal no
00:06:33grandpa you're late
00:06:35yes
00:06:42what kept you dad
00:06:44business
00:06:49well for goodness sake it's about time come on everybody i don't want to be out in that kitchen
00:06:57all night
00:06:58you're usually the first one home grandpa what you've been doing with yourself playing the piccolo
00:07:03someplace i had to see the shop foreman i was fired today you fired retired i think we call it
00:07:11what for what are you done nothing dollar only it seems the policy of the company not to employ people
00:07:17over 65
00:07:18oh grandpa i'm sorry thank you my dear
00:07:21how do you like that fire just because you're 65
00:07:25hey you're really 65 grandpa
00:07:28my how time flies
00:07:30boy has this been a wonderful day first i get pains in the stomach when i get home i find
00:07:35my father's been fired
00:07:36well eat your soup before it gets cold i don't feel like soup
00:07:40what's wrong with it not enough salt not enough salt not enough anything i tell you if it rains tomorrow
00:07:45i'll go nuts
00:07:46who said anything about rain the weatherman yes sir that's all we need now for it to rain and for
00:07:51me to catch pneumonia
00:07:52go on how can you get pneumonia you haven't even got a cold
00:07:55pneumonia happens to be an occupational disease with sign painters everybody knows that you stand on a ladder painting names
00:08:00on store windows it starts raining you get wet
00:08:03along comes a breeze
00:08:04down there you see what i mean pneumonia pneumonia just because you sneeze once or
00:08:10what's wrong with you cramps or don't you like my soup either i assure you my action has nothing to
00:08:18do with the quality of your food della
00:08:20i'm just not hungry so if you'll excuse me
00:08:23look if certain people around here don't like the way i cook just let them say so
00:08:29after all i would like to remind you that i was not raised to be a cook i happen to
00:08:35be a singer in
00:08:35case you've forgotten before i married your son i never even had my hands in dishwater mother nobody's
00:08:42talking about your cooking no but they're thinking about it the first thing you know somebody will
00:08:46remind me that i came from brooklyn but first i would like to remind them that some of the finest
00:08:52people in the world have come from brooklyn yes and while we're on the subject i would like to say
00:08:58that there is no telling how far i might have gone if i hadn't thrown away my career for the
00:09:04oh for goodness sake now look what's happened poor grandpa
00:09:10no wonder i have any appetite left first grandpa gets fired and you sneeze then the piccolo
00:09:19all we need around here is a great big shiny pipe organ
00:09:24huh
00:09:32born to be kissed i can't resist you are temptation and i am yours
00:09:46oh good morning grandpa good morning della what you're doing up so early
00:09:50i thought you'd sleep till 10 o'clock i'm not sleepy take my advice sleep when you can
00:09:56you want some coffee yes thanks only do me a favor grandpa don't sleep too late
00:10:03yours is the first room i clean i assure you that i have no intention of sleeping late thanks
00:10:12day by the way what are you going to do with yourself all day now that you're 65
00:10:17i don't know oh go to the movies i suppose there's a swell double bill at the rialto
00:10:27or maybe you could go up to the park and play checkers with those other old men oh
00:10:33what's so bad about that personally when i think of the drudgery i go through day by day i can't
00:10:40wait
00:10:40to get to be your age so i can live out my life with dignity dignity can be a very
00:10:47empty feeling della
00:10:48yeah well you can get used to it like me with the cooking
00:10:54hey
00:10:56i just thought of something with you not working you won't be bringing any money in i'm afraid not
00:11:05well if you'll pardon my saying so grandpa that's gonna be quite a blow
00:11:11financially speaking i mean i expect so yeah especially with the way prices are going up these
00:11:16days yesterday i went in to buy a soup bone just a common ordinary soup bone 78 cents he says
00:11:2678
00:11:27cents i says to him you used to draw him in for nothing not no more he says 78 cents
00:11:33i'll give you a faint idea soup bone 78 cents
00:12:10so what happened then so what happened so she picked up my hat and threw it at me did you
00:12:16right
00:12:16in the mouth get out of the house she yelled i got enough to do without you getting in my
00:12:22way all the
00:12:23time twenty years ago i'd have thrown her out of the window for that i'm a hungarian consolidated
00:12:30motors consolidated motors what's consolidated motors got to do with it that's what i'd have to know
00:12:38listen there's a public part never mind don't answer i'll find out myself
00:12:52now this is a question i'd like you to follow in all cases we'll put the letter on the automatic
00:12:57typewriter but leave the last paragraph please young man what has consolidated motors got to do
00:13:03with acme printing services grandpa what are you doing never mind the salutations look at this
00:13:07it says i've been fired because it's the policy of consolidated motors and its subsidiaries not to
00:13:14hire men over 65. i want to know what in thunder consolidated motors has to do with it search me
00:13:22hey erickson this is my girl's grandfather mr hodges he'd like to know what consolidated
00:13:27motors has to do with our 65 year old retirement rule why it's really very simple mr hodges if you
00:13:32just step this way for a moment pardon me
00:13:43now we of the acme printing services are a subsidiary of the bessemer publishing services
00:13:48whose stock is owned by the simpson iron foundry which recently merged with the mccullough nut and
00:13:53bolt company whose parent organization is of course united hardware the directorate of which
00:13:57is interlocked with brotherton steel a subsidiary of consolidated motors does that answer your
00:14:02question mr hodges yes i must say it seems a little complicated uh-huh big business now if you'll
00:14:07excuse me just a moment young man do you suppose if i went to consolidated motors i might get them
00:14:11to
00:14:12change such an absurd policy why mr hodges you don't mean you'd seriously consider going to
00:14:17consolidated motors about such a policy i'd seriously consider going to the north pole by a
00:14:22dog sled in the heart of winter i thought i could get my job back well i certainly wouldn't advise
00:14:28a
00:14:28trip to consolidated motors mr hodges even if you got an appointment which is very unlikely i don't see
00:14:34how consolidated motors could change its whole employment policy involving several hundred thousand
00:14:39people just to please you now wait a minute erickson maybe you could just write a letter to the
00:14:44president of consolidated motors tell him how you feel tell him what's his name whose name the
00:14:49president of consolidated motors i don't know uh sloan stone uh ross do you know mr hodges
00:14:57no but i'll find out mr benson who's president of consolidated motors the president of what the
00:15:03president of consolidated motors you got me why never mind i'll call mr gallagher's office
00:15:09mr gallagher's vice president charge personnel yeah pardon me mr gallagher erickson speaking do you
00:15:18happen to know who's president of consolidated motors used to be newton no he was president anyhow listen
00:15:24i'm busy yes mr gallagher thank you sir mr gallagher doesn't know either amazing absolutely amazing
00:15:32here's one of the most important men in america a veritable giant of industry one of the powers behind
00:15:38the producing genius that is america a man whose decisions affect millions of people yet nobody even
00:15:45knows his name fearless that's it fearless he's president of us steel oh thank you gentlemen you've been
00:15:54a great help good day here it is i found it consolidated motors look harold p cleveland president
00:16:08congratulations miss whether you're aware of it or not you have just solved one of the great mysteries of
00:16:20the age listen to him since 11 o'clock this morning it's been like this that means he's thinking don't
00:16:28have to think
00:16:29on the piccolo does he
00:16:56oh good morning mr mckinley good morning harriet
00:16:59bring in your book in the mail yes mr mckinley
00:17:12well what have we got for today 11 o'clock appointment with mr gallagher personnel
00:17:17one o'clock luncheon with the representative of the blakewell paper company i'd like some coffee dear
00:17:22yes mr mckinley then there's your tailor the barber the man about those shirts you ordered
00:17:27and don't forget your pills what the devil is this i don't know sir i didn't have time to open
00:17:32it
00:17:33yes mr mckinley listen gallagher i just got a letter from the executive secretary of consolidated
00:17:38motors advising me that harold p cleveland president of consolidated motors will be in town tuesday
00:17:43will i please show him every possible courtesy now what the devil is this all about
00:17:47i don't know beats me get herbert in new york well if you don't mind i don't like it what
00:17:52the devil
00:17:53does the president of consolidated motors want to come around here for maybe he's just passing
00:17:57through okay but i wish you please tell me what the devil this is all about
00:18:02we ever heard of this bird before not that i recall hello mr herbert just a moment mr mckinley
00:18:07calling hello herbert listen i just got a letter saying the president of consolidated motors is
00:18:14coming up here to inspect my plant next week i'd like to know why all of a sudden is consolidated
00:18:19motors fishing around my place well maybe it is just a goodwill tour but i don't like goodwill
00:18:25tours so do me a favor get a hold of whoever you can and find out if there's been a
00:18:29change in
00:18:29consolidated motors policy toward its subsidiaries maybe they've decided to quit printing make more
00:18:34cars or something okay call me back i want every executive in the conference room at 10 30 and
00:18:41cancel gallagher yes mr mckinley there are three copies of this as soon as you can listen gentlemen
00:18:49the president of consolidated motors is coming here next joseph to inspect our plant personally
00:18:53i don't mind telling you i don't like a lot of big shots sticking their noses in my business
00:18:58how do we know they haven't decided to convert this place into an assembly line for automobiles or
00:19:02washing machines remember you fellas are in this just as deep as i am your very jobs may depend
00:19:08upon it as i see it our only hope is to make a good impression i'd like to see some
00:19:12drawn looks
00:19:12on your faces as if you've been working overtime for months and i'd like to see this place really
00:19:16humming that's all gallagher how about that trouble we've been having with the book binders local oh we've
00:19:21got at least a month before any decisive action will be taken on that mr mckinley well never mind how
00:19:25much
00:19:25time we've got i'd like to strike a note of a chord in time for the inspection give an impression
00:19:28of
00:19:29a smoothly functioning factory full of happy employees now what do they want another restroom
00:19:32on the second floor okay get it installed immediately i'm not letting our relations with
00:19:36consolidated motors be disrupted over some bookbinders comfort uh harriet uh who's head of the program
00:19:42committee at the chamber of commerce arnold willoughby i want to talk to him on the phone oh but then
00:19:48get my
00:19:48wife dear what does he look like why he's great guns don't you know i never saw him in my
00:20:01life well
00:20:02of all the idiotic things a big man like mr cleveland a man who the president of consolidated motors
00:20:18and i don't know who's going to talk to him
00:20:31ah mr kinley what a pleasant surprise to find you here i hadn't anticipated such a welcome
00:20:37you're you're cleveland harold p cleveland well well how do you do mr cleveland this is indeed a great honor
00:20:43thank you may i present my associates oh i recognize mr salton stall and mr gallagher too
00:20:49uh delighted to see you gentlemen how did you know well i make it a practice to familiarize myself
00:20:53with all my associates and employees shall we go yes of course my car's outside take mr cleveland's
00:21:00briefcase oh no no thank you i can manage myself
00:21:24any special department you'd like to inspect mr cleveland you'll start with the hand press
00:21:28department in the composing room afterwards i'd like a word with your executives yes indeed i've
00:21:32already issued orders for all our executives to place themselves at your disposal mr cleveland may
00:21:36i ask is there any uh special significance to your visit special significance not at all it's only a
00:21:43a routine inspection tour
00:22:15That about covers it, Mr. Cleveland, unless, of course, you'd be interested in inspecting our personnel department.
00:22:19I think I've seen all this necessary.
00:22:38Here we are, Mr. Cleveland. This is our conference room.
00:22:40What's the matter?
00:22:41Come in, gentlemen.
00:22:41Well, I'll be a...
00:22:44Do you know who that was?
00:22:45Well, sure, the president of Consolidated Motors.
00:22:47The president of Consolidated Motors, my hind foot, that was John Hodges.
00:22:52Who?
00:22:52John Hodges of our hand press department, my girl's grandfather.
00:22:56Your girl's what?
00:22:57Grandfather. Didn't you see him wink at me?
00:22:59Why, certainly not. What are you talking about?
00:23:01About John Hodges.
00:23:02You know, the old guy who came in the other day and asked us the name of the president of
00:23:05Consolidated Motors.
00:23:06Yes, but what about him?
00:23:08That's him in there.
00:23:09Only everybody thinks he's the president of Consolidated Motors.
00:23:15Really, Elliot, you ought to see a doctor or something.
00:23:17Why in the world would an important man like Mr. McKinley be wasting his time with somebody from his own
00:23:22hand press department?
00:23:24Sometimes, Elliot, you're a very stupid man.
00:23:30Gentlemen, I'll tell you why I wanted to visit your plant.
00:23:33As a young man, I had great admiration for the art of printing.
00:23:37I still have that feeling.
00:23:39But in all frankness, I must tell you that I've been keenly disappointed with what I've seen here today.
00:23:46Well, you've got this place running like an automobile factory, and that's downright foolish.
00:23:51Not one single white-haired man did I see on the job.
00:23:56Where, I ask myself, where are those men?
00:23:59Those artisans.
00:24:00Yes, those artists whose love of their craft has been handed down from generation to generation.
00:24:06Got that, Harriet?
00:24:07Yes, sir.
00:24:09Now, I know it's the policy of consolidated motors not to hire people 65 years of age or over.
00:24:15Perhaps the labor technique of putting an automobile together requires youth rather than experience.
00:24:20But for the life of me, I don't see how such an asinine policy, and I use the word asinine
00:24:25advisedly, can apply it to the art of printing.
00:24:28My suggestion, Mr. McKinley, is that you forget about the age requirements of our assembly lines and bring back the
00:24:35experienced craftsmen who honor your trade immediately.
00:24:39Harriet, take a memo to all our executives.
00:24:42As of today, our employment policy is no longer governed by the 65-year age level.
00:24:47All employees who have been retired for that reason during the past year are to be notified immediately that their
00:24:53jobs are open, provided they wish to return to work.
00:24:56Thank you, gentlemen. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a train to catch.
00:24:59But, Mr. Cleveland, you can't leave just yet. I've arranged a luncheon in your honor at the Chamber of Commerce.
00:25:04What?
00:25:05And I've even taken the liberty of engaging a suite for you at the Commodore.
00:25:08And my wife is expecting you for dinner tonight. I'd never live it down if you didn't show up.
00:25:13Well, in that case, why not?
00:25:16Thank you, Mr. Cleveland. This way, please.
00:25:17Pardon me, Mr. Cleveland, but wouldn't you like me to send you a copy of your speech?
00:25:21Oh, thank you, young lady. I don't think it's necessary.
00:25:23I'm sure my suggestions are going to be carried out.
00:25:26Oh, yes. Yes, indeed, Mr. Cleveland.
00:25:27Well, anyhow, Mr. Cleveland, I want you to know I think your speech was grand.
00:25:31I felt real honored just to hear it.
00:25:33Oh, no, my dear. It's I who've been honored.
00:25:37Good day.
00:25:42Is he still in there?
00:25:43Who?
00:25:44John, I mean Mr. Cleveland.
00:25:46Yes, he's speaking now.
00:25:47Wait a minute. You can't go in. Only members.
00:25:49But I've got to go in. I've got to find out if he's...
00:25:51But you can't!
00:25:55Today, I hear a great deal of talk in this country about the dangers of inflation,
00:26:00which may lead to another economic depression.
00:26:02In a society as complicated and delicate as ours,
00:26:06we must leave no stone unturned in our search for stability.
00:26:11And in these old and expert men of 65 and over,
00:26:15there is a great fund of stability.
00:26:23I confess there are moments, gentlemen,
00:26:26when I regard mass production and its subsequent benefits of a higher standard of living
00:26:30as a two-edged sword.
00:26:33What are we sacrificing in this frantic chase for comfort?
00:26:37Well, for one thing, we're sacrificing those simple dignities of life which have helped make ours
00:26:45the greatest productive nation on earth.
00:26:52Now, mind you, I think that security and comforts are wonderful things.
00:26:57I'm all for social security.
00:26:59But in all our quest for this security,
00:27:02let us not lose sight of those things which have made this a great nation.
00:27:06Let us not forget that our economic strength depends basically on one thing,
00:27:13individual initiative.
00:27:15We here in America have a great tradition to uphold,
00:27:19a tradition of hard work,
00:27:21a tradition of opportunity,
00:27:23a tradition that every man may go just as far up the ladder of success
00:27:28as he individually is capable of going,
00:27:31a tradition that no one,
00:27:33in government,
00:27:34in industry,
00:27:35anywhere,
00:27:36can tell him what he can do
00:27:38and what he can't do,
00:27:40when he can work
00:27:42and when he can't.
00:27:48In all earnestness, I tell you, gentlemen,
00:27:52that just so long as our workers can go to their jobs
00:27:56with the same fervor and self-respect
00:28:00that they go to their wives,
00:28:03will we be able to fight off the threats of inflation
00:28:06and avoid the pitfalls of depression.
00:28:10I thank you.
00:28:27Mr. Cleaver, may I have your autograph?
00:28:30Oh, delighted.
00:28:32Oh, I'm sorry.
00:28:33I'm not permitted to sign autographs.
00:28:35Company policy, you know.
00:28:36Congratulations, Mr. Cleaver.
00:28:37Oh, dear, I'm sorry.
00:28:54I'm sorry.
00:28:56Well, it's about time.
00:28:57Oh, it's you.
00:28:58Where is he?
00:28:59Where's who?
00:29:00Mr. Hodges, your grandfather.
00:29:01Out?
00:29:01Why?
00:29:02Look at this.
00:29:06CM Prexy says human dignity will beat inflation.
00:29:09What's that got to do with us?
00:29:11Look at it.
00:29:12Look at it good.
00:29:14Whose picture's that?
00:29:15Says he's Prexy or CM, whatever that means.
00:29:18That's what it says, but it's him, Mr. Hodges.
00:29:20Your old man.
00:29:21Does?
00:29:21Oh, you're crazy.
00:29:24Look, I'm not blind.
00:29:25My eyes are good enough for the Air Corps, and I'm telling you, that's Mr. Hodges.
00:29:28I saw him today with my own eyes.
00:29:31Oh, for heaven's sakes, Joe.
00:29:32Sit down and stop being ridiculous.
00:29:34What in the world would Grandpa be doing at a Chamber of Commerce luncheon?
00:29:37Just look at the picture.
00:29:38That's all I ask.
00:29:39Just look at it.
00:29:40That could be a picture of anybody.
00:29:41As far as I can see, the only resemblance is they both got whiskers.
00:29:45Not even the same color whiskers.
00:29:47But I'm telling you, he winked at me.
00:29:50Joe, look at me.
00:29:51Look me in the eye.
00:29:53Have you been drinking?
00:29:55Drinking?
00:29:56I?
00:29:57I who think of nothing but success 24 hours a day drinking?
00:30:00Well, I like that.
00:30:02But I'll tell you one thing.
00:30:03I'm going to get cockeyed tonight if somebody doesn't start believing me.
00:30:06Oh, boy.
00:30:07What a house this is.
00:30:09First, we get a piccolo player.
00:30:11Then we get a fellow who sneezes just once,
00:30:13and all of a sudden he's in a hospital for an occupational disease.
00:30:16And now we've got a lunatic on our hands who starts seeing things in newspapers.
00:30:21Why, George, this Cleveland makes sense.
00:30:22I'm going to save this.
00:30:24I want Dad to read it.
00:30:25Read it?
00:30:26He said it.
00:30:27Joe, please.
00:30:28So you think I'm drunk?
00:30:29Well, what else am I to think when you come bursting in here screaming
00:30:33that Grandpa is president of Consolidated Motors?
00:30:35Okay.
00:30:36Okay, I'm a liar.
00:30:37I'm drunk.
00:30:38I don't know what I'm saying.
00:30:40But I'm telling you, I saw him today, and he winked at me.
00:30:43Good evening, everybody.
00:30:44There's good news tonight.
00:30:46This afternoon, Harold P. Cleveland, president of Consolidated Motors,
00:30:49offered a confused world the best recipe to beat inflation
00:30:51and continue prosperity that this commentator has heard.
00:30:54Yes, sir.
00:30:55Winked at me.
00:31:00Have you already mixed the martinis?
00:31:02Yes, madam.
00:31:03My husband likes them very dry.
00:31:05I understand, madam.
00:31:05He also likes them served immediately after he comes in.
00:31:08Yes, madam.
00:31:08Well, that may be he now.
00:31:09The wife should be bringing the better...
00:31:11Shall I go and see, madam?
00:31:11Please.
00:31:14Willie.
00:31:15Huh?
00:31:15Turn that thing off.
00:31:17Okay.
00:31:22Good evening.
00:31:23Good evening.
00:31:24Who shall I say is calling, sir?
00:31:26Me.
00:31:27Mr. McKinley.
00:31:28I live here.
00:31:29I beg your pardon, sir.
00:31:30You'll find Mrs. McKinley in the drawing room.
00:31:34New Butler.
00:31:35I tell you, the servant problem...
00:31:36Yes, I know.
00:31:37I've been having trouble with my cook lately, too.
00:31:41Lucille, this is Mr. Cleveland.
00:31:43Mr. Cleveland, my wife.
00:31:45How do you do, Mr. Cleveland?
00:31:46It was nice of you to come.
00:31:48It was nice of you to have me.
00:31:50Come on, meet him.
00:31:50But listen, do me a favor just for tonight
00:31:53and spare us any of your political philosophy.
00:31:55Okay, okay.
00:31:57Mr. Cleveland, this is our son, Willie.
00:31:59Good evening, young man.
00:32:00Hello, Mr. Cleveland.
00:32:02Hey, we were studying economics the other day
00:32:03and I saw a picture of you.
00:32:05But you don't look a thing like you do.
00:32:06Willie.
00:32:06Yes, sir.
00:32:08My husband likes martinis, Mr. Cleveland,
00:32:10but if you prefer something else...
00:32:11Not at all.
00:32:12My favorite beverage.
00:32:13He's dry?
00:32:14Yes, Lewis.
00:32:15Very dry.
00:32:15Four to one, sir.
00:32:17Here's to consolidated motive.
00:32:19But if you don't mind,
00:32:20I'd rather drink to a lovely lady.
00:32:27I'll take the tray.
00:32:29Yes, sir.
00:32:29What class are you in, young man?
00:32:31Tenth.
00:32:32On the football team?
00:32:33Well, kind of.
00:32:35Kind of.
00:32:36Oh, so that's the way it is.
00:32:37I used to be a bench sitter myself.
00:32:39How about a little refill, Mr. Cleveland?
00:32:42A wee modicum, perhaps?
00:32:43I thought we'd have dinner at home tonight.
00:32:45Just family style.
00:32:46Well, after that, if you like,
00:32:48I thought we three might run out
00:32:49to the country club for a little while.
00:32:50The country club?
00:32:51I'd like you to see it.
00:32:52It's brand new and not half bad.
00:32:54Most of my executives belong.
00:32:55Got a great little golf course.
00:32:57What do you say?
00:32:58Well, I'll be delighted.
00:32:59That is, if Mrs. McKinley...
00:33:00Oh, I'd like it very much.
00:33:01Very much indeed.
00:33:17By Joke, I want to dance.
00:33:19I haven't danced in 25 years at least.
00:33:21Suddenly, I want to dance.
00:33:23May I have this dance?
00:33:25Of course.
00:33:26You add?
00:33:26Not at all.
00:33:27Go right ahead.
00:33:35What kind of barbaric music is this?
00:33:37It's the Roomba.
00:33:38Well, for one moment, I had the wild illusion.
00:33:40It was the bunny hug.
00:33:43THE END
00:33:58THE END
00:34:41Mr. McKinley
00:34:42Yeah? Well, for myself, I think it's a waste of time. Look, if you don't mind, I'll run along. I've
00:34:47got some papers to go through.
00:34:48Well, perhaps we'd all better...
00:34:49Oh, no, you two stay here and enjoy yourselves. I'll send the car back.
00:34:52Oh, don't bother. We'll get a taxi.
00:34:54No bother. My driver's used to waiting.
00:34:56I'd prefer a taxi, Lewis.
00:34:59Okay. Good night, Mr. Cleveland.
00:35:00Good night, and thank you for a wonderful evening.
00:35:02Glad you liked it. We'll have to do this sort of thing again.
00:35:04Yes, indeed. I'd like that very much. By the way, before you go, there's just one thought that I'd like
00:35:09to leave with you, Mr. McKinley.
00:35:11Just a bit of my personal philosophy. I like a man who works and works hard, but that's not enough.
00:35:17A man ought to play and play hard, too. I have an idea that you don't play enough, Mr. McKinley.
00:35:23That's very sound advice, Mr. Cleveland. I'll take care of that in the future. Good night.
00:35:28Good night.
00:35:29Good night.
00:35:53Good night.
00:36:24Do you mind if we get out here? It's only a little way, but I can't bear to go in
00:36:28yet.
00:36:29Put up here. We'll walk the rest of the way.
00:36:42Just wait for me, please.
00:36:50You think I'm silly, don't you?
00:36:52On the contrary, I think it was a charming idea.
00:36:56You'll never know how much this evening is meant to me.
00:36:59You don't go dancing often, I take it?
00:37:02I never go dancing.
00:37:04Do you and your wife?
00:37:07My wife died 25 years ago.
00:37:10Oh.
00:37:11That's why you said you hadn't danced in 25 years, at least.
00:37:14I haven't done much of anything since then, except work.
00:37:20You loved her very much, of course.
00:37:23Of course.
00:37:24People don't love each other like that anymore.
00:37:27No.
00:37:28Life's become too complicated.
00:37:30Young men these days are afraid to marry
00:37:32until they can offer their wives all the frills of security and comfort.
00:37:40I don't think it was that way with us.
00:37:44I loved my wife.
00:37:46I loved my work.
00:37:48Life somehow just went on with a sort of simple grace.
00:37:59Are you leaving tomorrow?
00:38:01Unfortunately, very early tomorrow.
00:38:08I'm sorry.
00:38:10I don't know what's the matter with me.
00:38:12But I've been so happy tonight.
00:38:14So really happy.
00:38:16It's been so long.
00:38:18Good night.
00:38:19Good night.
00:38:21Good night.
00:38:37Listen, don't give me that he wanted to talk business routine.
00:38:40Funny, but every time I want to talk business, you're always too busy.
00:38:43But it's true, Mr. McKinley.
00:38:44You know, as a rule, I never mix business and pleasure.
00:38:47I only thought that Mr. Gallagher and I could take some of the office burdens off your shoulders.
00:38:51Office burdens?
00:38:52Well, that's a new one.
00:38:53And another thing.
00:38:54Since when do you have to dress up like that for a business conference?
00:38:58Okay.
00:38:59Tell Gallagher I'll take up this matter with him in the morning.
00:39:02Good night.
00:39:03Good night.
00:39:05You two must have closed up the joint.
00:39:13By George, you're really a good-looking woman, Lucille.
00:39:17And did he go for you?
00:39:19Couldn't take his eyes off you.
00:39:23What did you do after I left?
00:39:25Lewis.
00:39:28I want a divorce.
00:39:31What?
00:39:33You love me, Lewis.
00:39:35What the devil has that got to do with it?
00:39:37Answer me.
00:39:38Do you?
00:39:40Well, how do you like that?
00:39:43She meets a guy one night.
00:39:44And right away she starts yapping about, do I love her?
00:39:47What's the matter?
00:39:48Isn't my money good enough for you anymore?
00:39:51Haven't I supported you in the style to which you're accustomed?
00:39:53Yeah, and your whole family, too, for 20 years.
00:39:57You don't understand.
00:39:58You've never understood.
00:40:00Oh, yes, I do.
00:40:01I understand, all right.
00:40:02It's you that's cockeyed.
00:40:03But you're not going to get away with it.
00:40:04So you might as well get any tomfool ideas about divorce right out of your head.
00:40:08Please.
00:40:10Let's don't argue about it.
00:40:12We've been married 20 years.
00:40:14Sounds kind of silly to be talking this way after 20 years, doesn't it?
00:40:18I'm sorry it's turned out so badly.
00:40:21But I've been so miserable.
00:40:23Not so fast.
00:40:24I want to know what happened tonight.
00:40:25I told you nothing happened.
00:40:27Don't give me that.
00:40:28What happened?
00:40:31It's just that tonight, for the first time in years,
00:40:35I've known what it's like to be admired and respected,
00:40:38to be treated the way a woman wants to be treated.
00:40:42I know you think it's silly, but it's true.
00:40:46Oh, just once more before I turn the corner.
00:40:50I want to know what love is.
00:40:53Well, that's just great.
00:40:55That's just wonderful.
00:40:56You know a man 20 minutes, and it's love in blue.
00:40:59Oh, I realize I'll probably never see him again.
00:41:03But I can go on the rest of my life,
00:41:06just dreaming about tonight.
00:41:09Well, how do you like that?
00:41:11We've been married 20 years,
00:41:13and now you're in love.
00:41:28Oh, that looks nice.
00:41:40Only $20 down.
00:41:42Yeah, but with the present credit system in this country,
00:41:45controls and all...
00:41:46Joe, we're talking about a bedroom suite.
00:41:52My, my, obsolete.
00:41:56Deprexia of CM.
00:41:57So I'm crazy, am I?
00:41:59I'm drunk.
00:42:00Look at him.
00:42:00Grandpa, your beard.
00:42:04Dad.
00:42:05Look, Mr. Hodges, before you say a word,
00:42:07will you do me a favor?
00:42:07Will you tell these people...
00:42:09Dad, what have you done to yourself?
00:42:11What happened?
00:42:11You stay out of this.
00:42:12I want to get this matter settled first.
00:42:14Once and for all,
00:42:15are you or are you not the president of Consolidated Motors?
00:42:18My boy, you've no idea what I am.
00:42:21There.
00:42:22There.
00:42:22You see?
00:42:23I told you so, but nobody believed me.
00:42:24Oh, no.
00:42:25But why, Grandpa?
00:42:26Why did you do it?
00:42:27I wanted my job back.
00:42:29And just for that,
00:42:30you go out and pretend you're president of Consolidated Motors?
00:42:33I didn't count on it's getting so involved, Ella.
00:42:36I thought I'd just establish a new hiring policy and then come home.
00:42:39You didn't count on it's getting so involved.
00:42:42Boy, that's a good one.
00:42:43Get a load of this.
00:42:44Oh, an atrocious picture.
00:42:46You'd think with all the photographers there are in this town,
00:42:49at least one would have got me in focus.
00:42:51I give up.
00:42:51Honestly, I give up.
00:42:53My own father.
00:42:54Pardon me for asking, Grandpa,
00:42:56but what happens tomorrow
00:42:57when the real president of Consolidated Motors
00:42:59finds out he made a speech today?
00:43:01I'm sure I don't know, Della,
00:43:03but I must say it reads like a very good speech.
00:43:06I'll tell you what's going to happen.
00:43:07This is what's called confidence work,
00:43:09like selling phony stock.
00:43:10You can get five years in jail for this sort of thing.
00:43:13Really? So much?
00:43:15Personally, I give them 24 hours before they put you in jail.
00:43:18Unless, of course, you'd turn yourself in.
00:43:20That way they might be a little more lenient.
00:43:21I was in a show once
00:43:22where this fella pretends he's somebody else, only he ain't.
00:43:26Oh, boy, what they did to him.
00:43:28Holy smoke, I just thought of something.
00:43:30That jerk Erickson.
00:43:32I told him about it,
00:43:33and he's just the sort of heel that'll turn you in
00:43:35because he knows he'll probably get a promotion for it.
00:43:38Just my luck.
00:43:39He turns you in,
00:43:40and they make him assistant head of personnel.
00:43:42You sure about that?
00:43:43He'd turn his own mother in to get that promotion.
00:43:46He's that type.
00:43:46Well, then why don't you turn him in?
00:43:48Why should that other jerk get all the credit?
00:43:50I couldn't do a thing like that.
00:43:52Oh, don't be so noble all of a sudden.
00:43:54You want to marry Alice, don't you?
00:43:55Well, yes, but...
00:43:56Yeah, and you can't or you won't
00:43:57till you get that promotion.
00:43:59No, but that's...
00:44:00There's no buts about it.
00:44:01This is your big chance.
00:44:02I can't do a thing like that, Mrs. Hodges.
00:44:04Why, if it weren't for him,
00:44:05I'd never even have known Alice.
00:44:07Somebody's going to turn him in.
00:44:09Not me.
00:44:10Listen, Grandpa,
00:44:11will you tell Rover Boy here
00:44:13that he ain't putting you behind the eight ball
00:44:15if he turns you in?
00:44:16Joe's of age.
00:44:17He can make his own decision.
00:44:19I've already made my decision.
00:44:21I'm not going to do it.
00:44:22Well, for goodness sake, why not?
00:44:24You've all accused me of being
00:44:25just a man of facts and figures in economics.
00:44:27Well, you're wrong.
00:44:28I'm also a man of heart and blood and soul.
00:44:31And I'm not going to do it.
00:44:33I've got principles.
00:44:35Joe.
00:44:37Well, how do you like that?
00:44:39After all the time he spent
00:44:40hanging around this house,
00:44:42all of a sudden he's got principles.
00:44:44Good night, all.
00:44:45You're really a wonderful person, Joe.
00:44:48Oh, she was nuts,
00:44:49even if she is your mother.
00:44:51In this awful world
00:44:52where everybody's cutting
00:44:54everybody else's throat,
00:44:55you still have some decency left.
00:44:57I'm proud of you, Joe.
00:44:59Yeah.
00:44:59You have real dignity.
00:45:02Yeah?
00:45:05I love you, Joe.
00:45:06I love you, Joe.
00:45:46Come in.
00:45:49Grandpa, I've just made a wonderful discovery.
00:45:51Really?
00:45:52I've just realized that you're a great man.
00:45:55Ha-ha!
00:45:56I guess I'm beginning to grow up at last, Grandpa, to understand things.
00:46:00What kind of things, my dear?
00:46:02Dignity. That's the word. Dignity.
00:46:05All of a sudden it came to me like a flash of lightning.
00:46:07That there's nothing so important as a person's own dignity.
00:46:11It's more important than maintaining a high standard of living or even being assistant to the head of some old
00:46:17department.
00:46:18And that's what this was all about, wasn't it?
00:46:21You were fighting for your dignity.
00:46:23The dignity of your work.
00:46:25And for that you were willing to take on the whole complex world.
00:46:29I think you're a wonderful man, Grandpa.
00:46:32Thank you, my dear.
00:46:33Good night.
00:46:37Good night.
00:47:01Good night.
00:47:03Good night.
00:47:13In our time, we have grown accustomed to the machine age and its coldness.
00:47:18Mr. Cleveland's fine speech has given us a new realization of honor and humanity,
00:47:22as well as a truer understanding of the individual's place in our American culture.
00:47:27Our hat is off to Mr. Cleveland.
00:47:29He is a great American.
00:47:31Read what that paper there has to say, Mr. Cleveland?
00:47:34Not yet.
00:47:34It says, God bless Mr. Cleveland and Consolidated Motors.
00:47:38They've restored our faltering faith.
00:47:40That sure was some speech, Mr. Cleveland.
00:47:42Kind of makes you proud to be an American.
00:47:44Yeah.
00:47:46Hey, I've never seen anything like it.
00:47:48There must be 10,000.
00:47:50This isn't even half of them.
00:47:53Listen, Clancy.
00:47:54Of course, I'm only head of public relations around here.
00:47:57I suppose it would be too much trouble for anybody to tell me when the boss is going to make
00:48:01a speech.
00:48:01Don't blame me.
00:48:02I didn't know any more about it than you did.
00:48:04He told me he was going to the ball game yesterday afternoon.
00:48:06What a speech.
00:48:07This will sell a million cars.
00:48:08And look what's happened to the market.
00:48:09Opened two points up straight across the board.
00:48:11I've seen this.
00:48:14That's cute.
00:48:15Yes, sir.
00:48:15I bet the rest of the industry is tearing their hair out right now.
00:48:18Well, there's something fishy about all this.
00:48:20Unless I'm out of my mind, I was having luncheon with Mr. Cleveland at the plaza at one o'clock
00:48:24yesterday.
00:48:25Oh, now take it easy, Bill.
00:48:26You better lay off that hooch.
00:48:27That's when he was making this speech.
00:48:29Well, maybe 1.15, 1.30, but I know it was yesterday.
00:48:32Hey, Harold, what's the big idea?
00:48:33Set up a special meeting of the executive committee in my office at 11 o'clock and get my lawyers.
00:48:39To sum it up, gentlemen, it appears that this person's speech has not only caught the public's fancy
00:48:43and brought this company a great deal of goodwill,
00:48:45but it's had a profound effect on the whole market.
00:48:48Indeed, on the whole business structure of America.
00:48:51The question now is, what are we going to do about it?
00:48:55There's only one thing we can do.
00:48:57Categorically deny the whole thing.
00:48:58And categorically deny ourselves $25 million?
00:49:02Well, if we don't deny it, you can bet that somebody else will.
00:49:04Then where will we be?
00:49:05You're a lawyer, Joe.
00:49:06What do you think?
00:49:07Well, frankly, it looks to me like a carefully planned maneuver.
00:49:10Not only to create a bull market, but to put consolidated motors in an awkward spot.
00:49:14Maybe, though, actually, when you analyze it,
00:49:16the speech doesn't really say anything except what we've all been saying.
00:49:20About individual initiative, keeping our shoulders to the wheel,
00:49:24and giving a bunch of old men some jobs.
00:49:25If you ask me, I'd say it's the work of a crackpot.
00:49:29I disagree.
00:49:30I've read the speech a dozen times.
00:49:32I don't find any crackpot ideas in it.
00:49:34In fact, I consider it a splendid speech.
00:49:36I'm inclined to agree with everything it says.
00:49:38No, Ernest, the thing that worries me is,
00:49:40why didn't I make that speech?
00:49:42What?
00:49:42You're paid a handsome salary to handle the public relations of this company.
00:49:46Here's a fine business talk that I could have made.
00:49:49Now, why didn't you think of it for me?
00:49:50But, but, Mr. Cleveland, I, I...
00:49:52In fact, why didn't I think of it for myself?
00:49:55For that matter, why didn't some of you other gentlemen think of it for yourselves?
00:50:01Well, I think Mr. Cleveland has a point there.
00:50:03Now, my suggestion is that for the time being,
00:50:05at least until we can make an investigation...
00:50:07I've already taken steps to do that.
00:50:08Then I move we just sit tight.
00:50:10I second the motion.
00:50:11All in favor?
00:50:12Aye.
00:50:12Aye.
00:50:14Gentlemen, I know I don't have to caution anyone here
00:50:16that this is a matter of utmost secrecy.
00:50:18Good day.
00:50:31Uh, say, Frank.
00:50:33Yeah?
00:50:34You remember my telling you yesterday about
00:50:37the president of Consolidated Motors
00:50:39and how it was really an old guy in our hand press department?
00:50:41So?
00:50:42You haven't told anybody yet, have you?
00:50:44Well, hardly.
00:50:46Well, do me a favor and don't.
00:50:49It's a long story.
00:50:50I can't explain, but, uh,
00:50:51just take my word and don't.
00:50:53Sure.
00:50:54Thanks.
00:50:56Well, see you around.
00:51:25Well, see you around.
00:51:29Hold his best.
00:51:35Come here.
00:51:43Well?
00:51:44Mr. Gallagher, there's something going on around here that I think ought to be brought to Mr. McKinley's attention immediately.
00:51:49What sort of something?
00:51:51This whole Consolidated Motors thing, sir, it's just a gag.
00:51:55What whole Consolidated Motors thing?
00:51:57The man that was here yesterday inspecting the plant is not the president of Consolidated Motors.
00:52:01He's a printer in our hand press department.
00:52:04What's that you've got behind your back, Erickson? Dirty pictures?
00:52:07Oh, no, sir.
00:52:09This is the file on him.
00:52:11The file on who?
00:52:12On this man who everybody thinks is the president of Consolidated Motors.
00:52:16The one who made that speech at the Chamber of Commerce yesterday.
00:52:18Listen, are you drunk?
00:52:20Oh, no, sir.
00:52:22Well, then what's itching you? What are you driving at?
00:52:24Only that the man that was here yesterday inspecting the plant was an imposter.
00:52:27He pretended to be Harold P. Cleveland, the president of Consolidated Motors, and he's not.
00:52:31He's John Hodge as a printer.
00:52:33Listen, Erickson, if this is a gag, I don't like it.
00:52:35I know it sounds fantastic, sir.
00:52:36You're getting to be something of a screwball. You know that, don't you?
00:52:40Me, sir?
00:52:40I've got to make my choice for a new assistant around here pretty soon, and I don't mind telling you
00:52:45you're not giving me a very good impression.
00:52:47But it's not a gag, sir. It's true. Honest it is.
00:52:49What's true?
00:52:50The president of Consolidated Motors that was here yesterday was not the real president of Consolidated Motors.
00:52:55The real president is a man named Harold P. Cleveland. The man that was here yesterday is John Hodges, who
00:53:00works in our hand press department.
00:53:01All you have to do is look at his picture right here in the file, sir.
00:53:04Never mind the file. Now, let me get this straight.
00:53:06You say the whole world thinks the man who inspected our plant yesterday was the president of Consolidated Motors. Is
00:53:10that it?
00:53:11Yes, sir. And then he made the speech at the Chamber of Commerce.
00:53:13Mr. McKinley thinks he was the president of Consolidated Motors?
00:53:16The papers think so. The Chamber of Commerce thinks so. But you don't.
00:53:20You think he's a measly little printer on a hand press department.
00:53:22I'm sorry if you refuse to believe me, Mr. Gallagher.
00:53:24Oh, don't be silly, Erickson. Of course I believe you.
00:53:27And by the way, my name isn't Gallagher. I'm Harry Truman, president of the United States.
00:53:32And you're not Erickson. You're Princess Elizabeth's baby. Bonnie Prince Charlie, remember?
00:53:36But, Mr. Gallagher!
00:53:37Shut up! Get out of here!
00:53:38And the next time you come in with one of your full stories, I'll have you locked up in the
00:53:41padded cell. Now, get out!
00:53:54Mr. McKinley in?
00:53:56Who's calling, please?
00:53:57Kleinbaum is her name. Mr. Regal.
00:53:59Mr. McKinley's in conference. Perhaps if I could help you.
00:54:02I hear you had quite a bit of excitement around here yesterday.
00:54:05Excitement? What kind of excitement?
00:54:07With Mr. Cleveland, I mean.
00:54:09Oh, yes. Of course. Mr. Cleveland.
00:54:12Did you meet him, miss?
00:54:13Meet him? I took dictation from him.
00:54:16Yeah? I'll tell you whilst he sent us.
00:54:21Just a moment.
00:54:34Mr. McKinley, we'll see you now.
00:54:36Thank you, miss.
00:54:56How do you feel?
00:54:57Here, take a swallow of this.
00:55:04There, you'll be okay.
00:55:05You sent for the doctor.
00:55:06I don't want a doctor.
00:55:08And you keep out of here, too.
00:55:09I was only trying to help.
00:55:14Of course you understand this must be handled with absolute secrecy, Mr. McKinley.
00:55:18Don't worry.
00:55:19I'm the guy that was taken.
00:55:22Why, if this ever gets out, they'll laugh me right out of town.
00:55:26Don't excite yourself, Mr. McKinley.
00:55:27Why shouldn't I excite myself?
00:55:29My whole life's been disrupted.
00:55:31First, my wife wants a divorce.
00:55:33Now I faint.
00:55:35All on account of this phony.
00:55:37Oh, the crook.
00:55:39The dirty, low-down crook.
00:55:40I took him to my house for dinner.
00:55:42Just wait till I tell my wife.
00:55:44Oh, boy.
00:55:45Well, I laugh right in her face.
00:55:47Falling for a phony.
00:55:49Well, we'll take a look around.
00:55:50Yes, sir.
00:55:50If we find out anything, we'll let you know.
00:55:52Meanwhile, you'll get any ideas yourself, you will.
00:55:55Live in a palace.
00:55:56Oh, boy.
00:55:57Well, I laugh right in her face.
00:56:04I've got to see Mr. McKinley right away.
00:56:06It's a matter of life and death.
00:56:07What's the name?
00:56:07Mr. Erickson of the personnel department.
00:56:09Personnel?
00:56:10Mr. Gallagher's department?
00:56:11That's right.
00:56:11And please hurry.
00:56:13Mr. McKinley's very busy.
00:56:14He can't see anyone.
00:56:15I think Mr. McKinley would rather have things go right along as usual, miss.
00:56:27Mr. Erickson of the personnel department to see you, Mr. McKinley.
00:56:30Who the devil is Mr. Erickson of the personnel department?
00:56:32I assure you I haven't the faintest idea, Mr. McKinley.
00:56:35Only he says it's extremely urgent.
00:56:37Oh, he does, does he?
00:56:39Really, Mr. McKinley, I'm only trying to...
00:56:40Okay, okay.
00:56:41Send him in.
00:56:42Why not?
00:56:43The more the merrier.
00:56:52Well?
00:56:53Mr. McKinley, I have reason to believe that the man who was here yesterday posing as the president of Consolidated
00:56:57Motors was really an imposter.
00:56:59How would you like to be fired?
00:57:01Sir?
00:57:01Listen, you halfwits.
00:57:03If you dare breathe another word of what you've just said to me to a single soul, I'll have you
00:57:07thrown out of here on those pencil striped pants of yours.
00:57:09Mr. McKinley has a man's file right here.
00:57:10His picture.
00:57:11Shut up and get out of here before I brain you.
00:57:13Yes, sir.
00:57:13Wait a minute.
00:57:14Yes, sir.
00:57:14Give me that file.
00:57:15Yes, sir.
00:57:16Mr. McKinley, control yourself.
00:57:18Go fry an egg.
00:57:19Well.
00:57:21Oh.
00:57:22Well, thank you.
00:57:23Don't do anything until you hear further from me.
00:57:25Goodbye.
00:57:26Kleinbaum.
00:57:27He says the man works right there in the plant.
00:57:29The police been notified?
00:57:30Wait a minute.
00:57:31You want to break this thing wide open?
00:57:32But you can't let a low common thief, a confidence man, go around professing to be president of Consolidated Motors.
00:57:38Well, keep your shirt on.
00:57:40Nobody's suffered any great damages.
00:57:41In fact, when you come right down to it...
00:57:43Wait till you get a load of this.
00:57:44Straight from union headquarters.
00:57:46Listen.
00:57:46Since Mr. Cleveland has shown a willingness to see labor's point of view, and since the United Automobile Workers are
00:57:51just as eager as Mr. Cleveland to maintain the nation's economic strength,
00:57:54we hereby pledge ourselves to arbitrate all current differences in the same spirit as his speech.
00:57:59How do you like that?
00:58:00Why, this is absolutely the most ridiculous position the company has ever been in.
00:58:04Looks like we're saddled with that fool's speech whether we like it or not.
00:58:07That's right. If we deny it now, we'll be accused of trifling with the future prosperity of America.
00:58:11As a matter of fact, in view of the sharp market rise, I'm not sure that those of us who
00:58:16have bought consolidated motor stock recently wouldn't end up in jail.
00:58:21Gentlemen, my advice is to emulate that estimable creature of the sea, the clam, and say absolutely nothing.
00:58:28I still say there's something screwy about a simple little printer pulling a trick like this.
00:58:34That's possible, but if so, let's just hope he gets away with it.
00:58:36Fancy. Have my car here at 6 o'clock and phone my home and say I won't be there for
00:58:40dinner.
00:58:41That's all, gentlemen.
00:58:43Well, I still think...
00:58:46Just wait till you get a load of...
00:58:48What the devil is this?
00:58:50It's the suitcase I bought 12 years ago, when we were supposed to take that trip to Europe.
00:58:55What's it doing here?
00:58:56I'm going away.
00:58:58Listen, if you've got a fool notion like that, you better get it out of your head, because I got
00:59:01news for you.
00:59:02And you better get a good hold on the bed, because when you faint, I don't want you banging your
00:59:05head on the floor.
00:59:06What would you say if I told you we had a phony to dinner last night?
00:59:09A what?
00:59:10A phony.
00:59:11That bird's no more president of consolidated motors than I am.
00:59:14He's a crook, an imposter, but don't worry, I'll send him to jail if it's the last thing I do.
00:59:19Here, here's a whole record on him.
00:59:21Just look for yourself.
00:59:24Who is he?
00:59:25A printer.
00:59:27In my own hand press department.
00:59:29John Hodges.
00:59:30How do you like that?
00:59:31Why, I think it's wonderful.
00:59:33What?
00:59:34I said I think it's wonderful.
00:59:36Look, I'm in no mood for jokes.
00:59:37Now unpack that suitcase and come on down to dinner.
00:59:40But I won't be here for dinner.
00:59:41I'm leaving.
00:59:42Now listen, just because some measly $62 a week printer in my own factory dances the rumba.
00:59:47Last night, for the first time, he made me realize just how empty my life has been.
00:59:53And stop crying.
00:59:54You know I can't stand tears.
00:59:57Well, at least tell me, what have I done?
01:00:00You've killed my life for me, that's what you've done.
01:00:02You've never loved me, not for one moment.
01:00:05I'm forty years old.
01:00:06Forty-three.
01:00:07And I just can't go on being treated like a stick of furniture any longer.
01:00:11I've as much right to love as anybody.
01:00:13Even if I am forty.
01:00:15What you said.
01:00:19Have you really been so miserable, Lucille?
01:00:22Well, I'm sorry if I've made life so unbearable for you.
01:00:25I didn't know I was doing it.
01:00:27Well, maybe it's not all your fault, Louis.
01:00:29You can't help being what you are.
01:00:31But you are what you are and I can't stand it any longer.
01:00:36Who's going to tell Willie?
01:00:40I'll tell him.
01:00:41Lucille, this is a terrible thing that we're doing.
01:00:43I don't like divorce.
01:00:45I was brought up not to believe in divorce.
01:00:47We were married in a church and there's something unholy about a divorce.
01:00:50I wish you would weigh this decision carefully.
01:01:00Willie.
01:01:01Hello, Mom. I'm starved.
01:01:03Yes, dear, I know.
01:01:04Willie, I have a shop for you.
01:01:07But I think you're old enough and sensitive enough to understand.
01:01:10Sure, what is it?
01:01:13Your father and I, we're, we're separating.
01:01:17We're getting a divorce.
01:01:19Divorce?
01:01:21Is it a very big shock to you, dear?
01:01:23Is it a shock?
01:01:25Boy, is that some question.
01:01:26Of course it's a shock.
01:01:27Naturally, it's a shock.
01:01:28Oh, I'm sorry, dear, I didn't mean to shock you.
01:01:31But I thought it would be better if I came straight out and told you.
01:01:34Here, sit down, darling, please.
01:01:36I don't want to sit down.
01:01:37I don't feel like sitting down.
01:01:39You're angry with me.
01:01:40I'm not angry.
01:01:42I'm just upset, that's all.
01:01:44What's so surprising about being upset?
01:01:46You'd be upset, too, under the circumstances.
01:01:48Oh, dear, I didn't mean to upset you.
01:01:51Actually, I'm quite upset myself.
01:01:54I feel terrible.
01:01:56Right here in my stomach.
01:01:57Willie, you're not going to be sick.
01:01:59I don't know.
01:02:01I must have some kind of psychosomatic disorder.
01:02:03It hits me right here in my stomach.
01:02:06Oh, dear.
01:02:07I don't know what to say.
01:02:10I've never felt so miserable in my whole life.
01:02:14I'm going away.
01:02:17Where?
01:02:18I don't know.
01:02:20To my family in Maryland, I suppose.
01:02:23Of course, they'll be furious with me.
01:02:25They'll want me to come straight back and apologize to your father.
01:02:27But I...
01:02:28I just couldn't do that.
01:02:30Oh.
01:02:37Goodbye, dear.
01:02:42Go take some aromatic spirits of ammonia.
01:02:44Then lie down flat.
01:02:50Where's your mother?
01:02:51Gone.
01:02:52Gone? Gone where?
01:02:53To Maryland.
01:02:53I feel sick.
01:02:54I'm sick of my stomach.
01:02:55Listen, I've got no time for you and your stomach.
01:02:57I've got to stop her.
01:02:58That's a fine thing to say.
01:02:59A fine thing.
01:03:00My mother comes in and says,
01:03:01Don't get sick, but your father and I are getting a divorce.
01:03:04Then my father comes in and says...
01:03:05All right.
01:03:06All right.
01:03:06Take some soda water.
01:03:08I'll head her off at the railroad station.
01:03:09You stay here.
01:03:10If she comes back, don't let her out of the house again.
01:03:14I think I'm going to be sick all over the place.
01:03:17And that'll show them.
01:03:20Alice.
01:03:21Alice, I got it.
01:03:22I got it.
01:03:23Got what?
01:03:23The job, the promotion.
01:03:25Oh, Joe, that's wonderful.
01:03:27Now, can we get married?
01:03:28You said it.
01:03:29Just name the day and I'll be there with Bell sound.
01:03:30See, I knew.
01:03:31All you had to do was tell that Mr. Gallagher...
01:03:33I didn't tell him.
01:03:33I didn't tell him anything.
01:03:34He just called me in and said,
01:03:35Joe, that Erickson's nuttier in a fruitcake.
01:03:37How'd you like to be my new assistant?
01:03:39Oh.
01:03:40Congratulations, my boy.
01:03:42You're on your way.
01:03:43Someday, if you're not careful, you may even be a Mr. McKinley.
01:03:46Yes, sir.
01:03:47However, don't forget one thing.
01:03:49There's more in life than mere success, young man.
01:03:51Or rather, you should make up your mind what you mean by success.
01:03:55Remember, it's not just having a job.
01:03:57It's not just making money.
01:03:59It isn't?
01:04:00In fact, it has nothing to do with those things.
01:04:02It's what a man gets out of his work that matters.
01:04:04Are you doing something you like?
01:04:06Are you aware of the essential dignity of what you're doing with your hands, with your mind?
01:04:11Well, I certainly...
01:04:11First of all, there's a stewardship of responsibility that one of your generation...
01:04:15Yeah, well, there's the beer.
01:04:16What beer?
01:04:17The beer I ordered to celebrate our engagement, you dope.
01:04:20A case, a whole case.
01:04:21Wait.
01:04:22How do you know it's the beer?
01:04:23Maybe it's the police.
01:04:24The police?
01:04:25Oh, my goodness.
01:04:26I'll go.
01:04:30Yes?
01:04:32Does a...
01:04:33A Mr. John Hodges live here?
01:04:36Who's calling, please?
01:04:38Mrs. Lewis McKinley.
01:04:40McKinley?
01:04:40Oh, I'm sorry.
01:04:41He's gone to the country.
01:04:42Let Mrs. McKinley in.
01:04:44You're...
01:04:45You're...
01:04:45John Hodges.
01:04:46I dyed my whiskers.
01:04:48You must excuse my granddaughter's behavior, but you see, we were expecting the police,
01:04:51so naturally she was suspicious.
01:04:53This is the rest of our family.
01:04:54My son George.
01:04:56My daughter-in-law.
01:04:57Hello.
01:04:58And Mr. Elliot, the young man who thought you were a case of beer.
01:05:01How do you do?
01:05:02How do you do?
01:05:03Uh, may I see you for a moment alone, please?
01:05:06Certainly.
01:05:06Come into my bedroom.
01:05:09His bedroom?
01:05:10So what?
01:05:12After what's been going on in this house for the last 24 hours, you gonna draw the line
01:05:16at a bedroom?
01:05:17So what?
01:05:19No, please.
01:05:20Don't turn on the lights.
01:05:21Not yet.
01:05:22Well, it's a little compromising, isn't it, not having the lights on?
01:05:25Well, I...
01:05:27I'd like to feel a little compromise.
01:05:32I'm leaving my husband.
01:05:34Really?
01:05:35May I ask why?
01:05:37I...
01:05:41Well, I...
01:05:43I told him I was in love with you.
01:05:45With me?
01:05:46But that's ridiculous.
01:05:48You've only seen me once.
01:05:50That doesn't matter.
01:05:51I know you for what you are.
01:05:52A gallant and wonderful man who respects me and acts like a gentleman.
01:05:56Even if you are what my husband said you are.
01:05:59A...
01:05:59A phony.
01:06:00Did your husband say that?
01:06:02He said some terrible things about you.
01:06:04He said you're a crook and an imposter and he's going to put you in jail.
01:06:07But I don't care.
01:06:08I'll stand by you.
01:06:09I'll even go to court and testify for you.
01:06:11And you can testify for me.
01:06:13Mrs. McKinley, I'm going to turn on the lights.
01:06:15Oh, no, please.
01:06:16Not yet.
01:06:17Yes, Mrs. McKinley.
01:06:18Now.
01:06:19Immediately.
01:06:20Mrs. McKinley, though I may be everything that your husband says I am,
01:06:24and everything that you believe me to be,
01:06:25I am emphatically not a correspondent in a divorce suit.
01:06:29Do I make myself clear?
01:06:31Then last night was just last night?
01:06:35Mrs. McKinley, you're a very handsome woman.
01:06:37You dance extremely well.
01:06:39You also have a gift for summing up a situation.
01:06:42Last night was simply last night.
01:06:46I'm sorry if my bluntness offends you,
01:06:48but I assure you I have no intention of coming to treat any man and his wife,
01:06:52especially one as impulsive as you are.
01:06:56Perhaps if I were 30 years younger...
01:06:59Oh, no, please.
01:07:00Don't blame yourself.
01:07:01I understand, and I deserve this.
01:07:03I guess I'm just a silly woman who's made quite a fool of herself.
01:07:08Though it pains me to say so, you are.
01:07:11My husband and I have been married for 20 years,
01:07:13and this is my first infidelity.
01:07:16You don't say.
01:07:17He married me because I was society,
01:07:20and I married him for his money.
01:07:21Not that I couldn't have fallen in love with him.
01:07:23He's not bad-looking, you know.
01:07:24On the contrary.
01:07:25He has a certain vibrance.
01:07:27Oh, yes, I'd say he's full of vibrance.
01:07:29Sometimes there's something almost exciting about him.
01:07:33Only he's not in love with me.
01:07:35How can you be so sure?
01:07:37Well, at first I thought he might be in love with me.
01:07:38I can remember he used to kiss me with all the tenderness of a...
01:07:43of a...
01:07:44A wild stallion?
01:07:47Then after a while, he never kissed me at all.
01:07:50Life was just a succession of fur coats and invitations to dinner.
01:07:55That's all I've been.
01:07:56An invitation to dinner.
01:07:58Mrs. McKinley, do you know what I think?
01:08:00I think you're in love with your husband.
01:08:02Me?
01:08:03I have an idea that if you were to kiss him once, just once,
01:08:06with all the tenderness of a...
01:08:08of a...
01:08:09Wild mare?
01:08:12Mrs. McKinley, I think we both need some coffee.
01:08:15Let's get out of here.
01:08:17I knew this would come in handy.
01:08:19Here.
01:08:20Hang on to that.
01:08:23Serviette?
01:08:24Hey, a beer!
01:08:26I'll get it.
01:08:31Yes?
01:08:32My name is Harold P. Cleveland.
01:08:34I'm looking for Mr. John Hodges.
01:08:38They're here.
01:08:39Who?
01:08:40Some man who says he's Harold P. Cleveland.
01:08:42The one with the black beard?
01:08:43That was Grandpa.
01:08:44Here, I'll handle this.
01:08:50You got a warrant?
01:08:51No.
01:08:51Nobody gets in here without a warrant.
01:08:54Who is it now?
01:08:56Some flatfoot pretending he's Harold P. Cleveland.
01:08:58Who does he think he's fooling?
01:09:00Anybody knows that Harold P. Cleveland
01:09:01wouldn't be coming here personally to make the arrest.
01:09:07Good evening, sir.
01:09:07You were looking for me?
01:09:08You're John Hodges.
01:09:09I am.
01:09:10I'm Harold P. Cleveland.
01:09:12How do you do, Mr. Cleveland?
01:09:13Won't you come in?
01:09:15Mr. Cleveland, I'd like you to meet my son, George,
01:09:18my daughter-in-law, Della.
01:09:19Hello.
01:09:20Mrs. McKinley,
01:09:21my granddaughter, Alice,
01:09:22and her fiancé, Mr. Elliot.
01:09:24How are you?
01:09:24We're celebrating their betrothal.
01:09:26Oh, congratulations.
01:09:27Take Mr. Cleveland's hat, Alice.
01:09:29Oh, no, thank you.
01:09:29I can only stay a moment.
01:09:30You're not Harold P. Cleveland.
01:09:32You can't fool us.
01:09:34But I am Harold P. Cleveland.
01:09:35If you don't believe me, my chauffeur is outside.
01:09:37Ask him.
01:09:38How do we know he's your chauffeur?
01:09:40Well, I don't usually carry much in my wallet.
01:09:43But here.
01:09:45Sorry I haven't my fingerprints.
01:09:47What is it you want, Mr. Cleveland?
01:09:49I just wanted to meet Mr. Hodges, that's all.
01:09:52I'd like an explanation.
01:09:53I think I deserve an explanation.
01:09:55I agree, Mr. Cleveland.
01:09:56Would you step in here, please?
01:09:58I don't mind telling you, Mr. Hodges,
01:09:59you put Consolidated Motors in a highly ridiculous position
01:10:02with this escapade of yours.
01:10:03And while I'm told that technically you've committed no crime,
01:10:06I'd still like to know why you did it.
01:10:08Did I hear you say that I'd committed no crime?
01:10:10Probably not.
01:10:11At least that's what our lawyers say.
01:10:12And from the fees they get, they ought to know.
01:10:15Well, well.
01:10:16Well, this is a pleasant surprise.
01:10:18My son here was sure that I'd go to jail for five years.
01:10:22Imagine that, George.
01:10:23No crime.
01:10:24What do you know?
01:10:25He really is the president of Consolidated Motors.
01:10:27He is?
01:10:28There's no doubt about it.
01:10:29Is that so?
01:10:32My, what a crazy evening this has been.
01:10:35First my daughter gets engaged and then the president of Consolidated Motors drops in.
01:10:40Uh, Joseph, get the president of Consolidated Motors the chair.
01:10:45I declare when you stop to think of it.
01:10:47You know, nobody's gonna believe me when I tell them.
01:10:50They're gonna laugh right in my face.
01:10:53Somebody give him a piece of cake.
01:10:54Oh.
01:10:57It's a Lady Anne chocolate surprise.
01:10:59Well, uh, no thanks.
01:11:01Oh, come on.
01:11:01I made it myself.
01:11:02My doctor doesn't allow me to eat cake.
01:11:04Oh?
01:11:05Why?
01:11:06You got diabetes?
01:11:08Well, no.
01:11:09It's something entirely different.
01:11:11Oh.
01:11:12I'm sorry.
01:11:14May I shake your hand, Mr. Cleveland?
01:11:16I'd like to tell the people at the plant that I shook the hand of the president of Consolidated Motors.
01:11:21Not that they'd believe me, but I'd like to tell them so anyway.
01:11:24That'll do, Joe.
01:11:26Maybe you'd like a cup of my special coffee, Mr. President.
01:11:29Everybody says what good coffee I make, even though I'm not the cook type.
01:11:33I was on the stage, you know.
01:11:35Maybe you saw me.
01:11:36No, I'm afraid I never had that privilege.
01:11:38Have you any saccharine?
01:11:40Saccharine?
01:11:41No, but we can get you some in just a minute.
01:11:43Hey, Joseph, run over next door and borrow a cup of saccharine.
01:11:47Oh, well, please don't bother.
01:11:48I'll take it just as it is.
01:11:49Only half cream.
01:11:50No bother at all.
01:11:52You sure you never saw me?
01:11:54I was billed as Della Robbia, the bombshell of song.
01:11:57I never went to the theater when I was a young man.
01:12:00And now, Mr. Hodges, I'd like to hear your story.
01:12:02Well, it's really a very silly story, Mr. Cleveland.
01:12:05In fact, when I look back on it, it seems absolutely incredible.
01:12:08Here you are.
01:12:10Excuse me.
01:12:11Now, don't go away.
01:12:11I'll be back in just a minute.
01:12:22Of course, going to the Chamber of Commerce was something I hadn't counted on.
01:12:25The beer.
01:12:28Mr. McKinley.
01:12:29I thought I'd find you here.
01:12:30Yes, Lewis.
01:12:31Okay, all right.
01:12:31I love you.
01:12:32Do you hear I love you?
01:12:33Now, come on home and stop this nonsense.
01:12:34I beg your pardon?
01:12:35You keep out of this, whoever you are.
01:12:37This is between me and my wife.
01:12:38Who are you anyway?
01:12:39Harold P. Cleveland, President of Consolidation.
01:12:40Listen, I've heard all the Cleveland that I want to hear.
01:12:42It's all right with me if I never hear that name again.
01:12:44You understand?
01:12:45Now, come on home, will you?
01:12:47I apologize for whatever I did.
01:12:48I said I apologize.
01:12:50You're right, Lewis.
01:12:51Only don't shout so.
01:12:52I'm not shouting.
01:12:53I just said I apologize.
01:12:55Yes, dear.
01:12:55I heard you.
01:12:56Dear?
01:12:57Did you call me dear?
01:12:59Yes, dear.
01:13:00Well, I'll be.
01:13:04Hodges, you're fired.
01:13:10Grandpa.
01:13:12Grandpa?
01:13:12Oh, I beg your pardon.
01:13:23Well, who the devil's car is that?
01:13:25Mr. Harold P. Cleveland, President of Consolidated Motors.
01:13:28Harold P. who's?
01:13:29The man you yelled at inside, dear.
01:13:33And that, Mr. Cleveland, is the whole story.
01:13:36And quite a story it is, Mr. Hodges.
01:13:38Pardon me for suggesting it, but I just happened to have this album laying around,
01:13:42and only this afternoon I said to myself, Della, if the right party...
01:13:46Della, there's no time for that now, after what's just happened.
01:13:49After what's just happened?
01:13:51Dad's been fired.
01:13:52That's what.
01:13:52Fired.
01:13:53Fired?
01:13:54What, again?
01:13:55It's all right, Della.
01:13:56I knew all the time it wouldn't work.
01:13:58Oh, fired.
01:13:59And after all the trouble we've gone through.
01:14:02Mother, please.
01:14:03Okay, but it's a fine time to tell.
01:14:05It's right in front of the President of Consolidated Motors.
01:14:08If you've really been fired, Grandpa, what are you gonna do?
01:14:11Well, I know one thing I won't do, and that's go sit in the park and feed the pigeons.
01:14:15How would you like to work with me in New York, Mr. Hodges?
01:14:18There's a little office next to mine.
01:14:20We could have it redecorated.
01:14:21Oh, Grandpa.
01:14:22For goodness sake, imagine New York.
01:14:24Maybe you could find a little apartment.
01:14:26I'm sorry, Mr. Cleveland, but I couldn't do that.
01:14:28You know the well-known hackneyed phrase, New York may be all right for a visit, but...
01:14:32Maybe you could live in Brooklyn.
01:14:34No, Della.
01:14:35Not even Brooklyn.
01:14:37Oh, it's a question of money.
01:14:38No, thank you.
01:14:39I make all the money I need right here.
01:14:42All the money you need?
01:14:44Listen, you just lost your job.
01:14:46And with the price of soup bones going up...
01:14:48I'm sorry, Della.
01:14:50You'd have lots of leisure.
01:14:52I'd only want you around for advice in public relations matters.
01:14:55Maybe we could go to a ball game together occasionally.
01:14:58Thank you, Mr. Cleveland, but no.
01:15:00This is my home.
01:15:01My family's here.
01:15:03We're happy.
01:15:04That is, as happy as people need to be.
01:15:06I have my health.
01:15:07I eat what I like.
01:15:09I drink my coffee without saccharine.
01:15:11I don't have to make speeches unless I want to.
01:15:14Go to board meetings.
01:15:15Worry about stockholders, unions, income taxes.
01:15:19Come to think of it, Mr. Cleveland, why don't you move out here?
01:15:22You're still young enough to get a good job.
01:15:24Now, please, Mr. Hodges.
01:15:26Don't tempt me.
01:15:28Well, I must be running along.
01:15:30Good night, everybody.
01:15:30Good night, sir.
01:15:35Well, don't look at me.
01:15:36He's your father.
01:15:40I'm sorry you won't come with me, Mr. Hodges, but I think I see your point.
01:15:45As to your job at Acme Printing, I wouldn't worry about that if I were you.
01:15:49You heard Mr. McKinley fire me.
01:15:51Mr. McKinley apparently has high blood pressure.
01:15:54I'll send him a note tomorrow.
01:15:56No, I'll make it a directive that you're to have your job as long as you want it.
01:16:00Well, thank you.
01:16:01You've been very understanding.
01:16:02If there's ever anything I could do for you...
01:16:04Well, you should ever get an idea for another good speech.
01:16:07It would be a pleasure, Mr. Cleveland.
01:16:09A pleasure, indeed.
01:16:11You're a great man, Mr. Hodges.
01:16:12A truly great man.
01:16:14Thank you, Mr. Cleveland.
01:16:15So are you.
01:16:17Good night.
01:16:18Good night.
01:16:23Good night.
01:16:27Good night.
01:16:29Good night.
01:16:32Good night.
01:16:42You
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