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00:00Shorty West, short-life
00:04There's a girl who's hunting away
00:08Oh, so bad, and that's good
00:12Short-life, short-life
00:16Short-life, short-life
00:20Short-life, short-life
00:22Short-life, short-life
00:31Short-life
00:32The luxury line at Galaxy is on a New Year cruise around the Western Caribbean.
00:36Jane, the singer, fighting chronic stage fright and homesickness, is still haunted by a terrible fear of failure.
00:43And Scotty, the hyperactive DJ who had to pacify hundreds of angry passengers before embarkation, hailed in the brand new
00:51year.
00:52And the wonderful and prosperous 1997!
00:57But not everyone is happy. Veteran cruiser Ros Goodman is on the warpath.
01:01I was shocked to find that they changed the itinerary without telling me.
01:04She thought the ship was going to the Eastern Caribbean, and she's demanding compensation for herself, husband Mel, and constant
01:11companion Edwina.
01:14Today, we're headed for the tropical paradise of Grand Cayman.
01:19We're headed for the tropical paradise of the state, and she's demanding that we are in the town.
01:23We're headed for the tropical paradise of the city.
01:25One, four, five.
01:26One, four, five.
01:28One, four, five.
01:29Steady on one, four, five.
01:36Two, ten-one, one, four, five.
01:50Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Grand Cayman.
01:53We're going to tender today, and guests who would like to proceed to show may do so at this time.
01:59The last tender will leave the island at 4.30, and the galaxy will sail this afternoon at 5.00
02:05p.m.
02:06Once again, we thank you, and do enjoy your day in Grand Cayman.
02:17Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Grand Cayman.
02:20All guests who are not participating in a short excursion...
02:24Good morning. I know that you have a special day today, and I want to congratulate you, and to wish
02:28you all the best, and have a good day.
02:30Oh, thank you so much.
02:32Good morning to you. Belle's just doing the walk-a-mile.
02:35All right.
02:36There we are.
02:38Hello, it's morning.
02:39No, no.
02:41Hello, it's morning.
02:42It's a big day. A real big day.
02:45I didn't think I was going to be nervous, but last night, oh.
02:49Really?
02:50Yeah. It's about 4 o'clock this morning, and I was ready to get up and go.
02:55I've been nervous for about a week.
02:58And I just keep getting more nervous.
03:01You think?
03:01Yeah.
03:03Give her perhaps a pastry to start with.
03:05No, perhaps you'll have a croissant or something like that.
03:08That's a croissant, yeah, if you try that.
03:09Would you like more of that?
03:10Yes, OK.
03:12I'm going to have orange juice, please.
03:15Then I'll have fresh orange sections and fresh melon together.
03:19Oatmeal.
03:19Then I'm going to have smoked salmon and bagel, but I don't like the cream cheese.
03:24Why don't you just order the whole menu?
03:26Well, I don't order the whole menu.
03:27I think I'll have a cheddar cheese omelette.
03:31Last breakfast as, what, as a...
03:35As a non-married couple.
03:36As a non-married couple.
03:37Who had the idea to get married on a Caribbean island?
03:40We'd just come with it together, you know?
03:42It was kind of like one of those exotic dreams.
03:45Right.
03:46So another day is here.
03:48Yeah.
03:50Oh.
03:50Have you seen the Bible this yet?
03:52Oh, no.
03:53No.
03:53Even though we're kind of straying away from some of the traditions, that's one we had to keep.
03:58You know, she was real firm in saying, you're not seeing my dress.
04:01So I have not seen it at all.
04:02So I'm kind of excited to see that, too.
04:05Ah.
04:07This looks nice.
04:09Mmm.
04:11I agree.
04:11Oh, you put the cutlery in her pour so she can tuck in.
04:16That's it.
04:17Put it there so she can enjoy that.
04:44Well, I guess it's about time.
04:46She's ready by now.
05:04Oh, you look beautiful.
05:08Oh, that's very pretty.
05:11Oh, my gosh.
05:13I had no idea.
05:15Yeah.
05:16Wow.
05:17Have you seen it?
05:19I was going to say, turn around for the model.
05:22Looks beautiful.
05:24Looks beautiful.
05:25Oh.
05:27It's so pretty.
05:28So pretty.
05:30Even the earrings.
05:32I love the earrings, even.
05:35Beautiful.
05:37Ah, I love these so much.
05:43Well, I'm going to have a facial.
05:46I'm going to be pampered.
05:48So, um, I really, uh, I've got to get the bags off my eyes.
05:54Oh, hello.
05:55Good morning to you.
05:56How are you?
05:57Yes, well.
05:58How's Adwina this morning?
06:00She's fine.
06:00She's had her breakfast.
06:02She has.
06:02Right.
06:03I know you're here, obviously, to get a resolution from us.
06:06And what I'd like to do, because I don't have any paperwork yet, I need to speak to the hotel
06:09manager.
06:10Would you like to set up an appointment for later today or tomorrow morning?
06:13And we can, we can sit down and see.
06:15Well, by tomorrow morning, will he have a decision?
06:17This is it.
06:18I mean, I want to speak to your superior.
06:20I've just been, um, fobbed off.
06:23Can you just get your jacket off for me and your earrings?
06:27Don't put a cellulite in this.
06:35Boy, the water's just charming.
06:37It's not too late, buddy, the door's open.
06:39Yeah.
06:40Good job, huh?
06:43When something happened on another ship, they sent me flowers, they sent me wine, water pouring through the ceiling, you
06:49know, just to placate me.
06:50But there's nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing, not even a gesture, so.
07:00I've got quite a few blemishes, haven't I?
07:02Yeah, you have.
07:03You must be nurse.
07:05Who's your hotel manager?
07:06Is it Mr. Demartis?
07:07Or what about the assistant?
07:09I mean, basically, they're in meetings this morning, because I can't, I can't speak for them regarding their schedule.
07:14So we drag it on another time, yeah.
07:16Okay.
07:17Not really good enough.
07:19It's just relaxing you.
07:25My patience is running out now.
07:27All right.
07:28Thanks very much, Cynthia.
07:29Patience is good.
07:29Oh, you're welcome.
07:30See you later.
07:30Okay, absolutely.
07:31Enjoy your day.
07:32Ladies and gentlemen, can I just have your attention just for one moment?
07:36I just want to, on behalf of Scotty and myself, extend a very warm welcome to our honeymooners.
07:42It's so nice that a few of you are coming to this little get-together this morning.
07:45I hope you're all enjoying the cruise tremendously.
07:48I wish you many, many years of happiness.
07:52And congratulations to all of you, from Scotty and I, congratulations.
07:58It's so beautiful.
07:59I, this is exactly what I wanted.
08:02Are you still nervous?
08:03Mm-hmm.
08:03Really nervous?
08:05I think we'll be fine.
08:07Don't you?
08:09Oh, I love you.
08:11Oh, I love you.
08:13Oh, how have you done?
08:14Are you hopeful?
08:15Well, I think we should get a good result.
08:17You're pretty confident.
08:19I don't know.
08:19I mean, it's in their interest to keep me satisfied.
08:23Otherwise, I'm extremely disappointed.
08:24I am disappointed.
08:25It's a lovely chick, but I'm not going where I booked to go.
08:31Once again, please join us on the dance floor.
08:35Enjoy your time.
08:42You know, it's kind of weird doing the honeymooners party, though, because I'm standing out here
08:47and I'm talking to all these beautiful couples that just got married and they're taking their
08:51vacation of a lifetime and they're all romantic and everything.
08:54And, you know, I'm divorced and everything and I look at it and I'm like, wow, 22.
09:00Married and divorced in the same year.
09:01That's the weird thing.
09:03So, a little depressing, but, hey, the good Lord's got something planned.
09:07He'll set me up the right one.
09:09Basically, we're living the passenger's dream because a lot of the passengers that come on here,
09:12so that's the only other cruise that'll ever come on during, you know, their whole life.
09:16Everything's very glamorous, but behind the scenes it isn't, isn't it?
09:19There's a lot of scandal on ships as well, isn't there?
09:22Absolutely.
09:24And going off with other people's boyfriends and girlfriends.
09:27There's a lot of that going on.
09:29There is, actually, yeah.
09:30It's like all morals go out the window on a ship.
09:35It's like things happen on ships which you just, you would never do on land.
09:39And you end up with people also that you would never look twice at on land.
09:45Yeah, you do.
09:45You know, I mean, you know, my line used to be in the staff bar, please get me out of
09:50here because everybody's looking attractive.
09:52You know, the more beer I drank, everybody's not really attractive.
09:57You know, the more beer I drank, I drank, I drank, I drank.
10:01He's just relaxing over there at the moment.
10:08Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the sight of God
10:11to join together this man and this woman.
10:16Let us pray.
10:17Father God, as we bring Amy and Jonathan before you this morning,
10:21we pray that you would bless their joining together.
10:23Pray that you would bless this ceremony, Lord.
10:27Why is men the same, only fools rise to you.
10:38Amy and Jonathan, as you pledge your vows each to the other in marriage,
10:41will you join hands and face each other and repeat after me, please?
10:45I, Jonathan, take thee, Amy.
10:47I, Jonathan, take thee, Amy.
10:49To be my wedded wife.
10:50To be my wedded wife.
10:51To have and to hold.
10:52To have and to hold.
10:53From this day forward.
10:54From this day forward.
10:55For better or worse.
10:57For better or for worse.
10:58From now until forever.
10:59From now until forever.
11:03I, Amy, take thee, Jonathan.
11:05I, Amy, take thee, Jonathan.
11:07To be my wedded husband.
11:09To be my wedded husband.
11:10To have and to hold.
11:24Everybody falls in love on ships.
11:26I mean, it's the most romantic setting in the world.
11:28You've got the beautiful sunsets and you've got the beautiful sunsets and you've got the gorgeous islands and the heat.
11:34I mean, everybody just falls in love on a ship.
11:37This is what happens.
11:39And then you go back to London and you go back to London and think, Jonathan and Amy, by virtue
11:48of the authority vested in me by the laws of the Cayman Islands, it gives me a great deal of
11:51pleasure to pronounce you as both husband and wife.
11:55May you kiss your wife, please.
12:06May you kiss your wife, please.
12:27Well, I spoke to Cynthia earlier on this morning, no news.
12:31And I really think they're fobbing me off.
12:33I think they know something, but they're not saying they made it to tell me tomorrow.
12:37Let's hope.
12:38And I'm really getting fed up.
12:41The holidays are over now at home and they must be back in the office.
12:44Yeah, something's not over.
12:45There was a good excuse on the first, you know, it's bank holiday.
12:48And now they're back.
12:50They've got satellite communication.
12:52I think I'd rather go to the piggy machine.
12:55Enough of this one.
12:55I'm going to try another machine.
12:57Off we go.
12:59It must have been older in my shadow
13:07To never have sunlight on your face
13:14You were glintons to let me shine
13:21You always want to step behind
13:2834, 75, 75, thank you very much indeed.
13:32I think we'll go upstairs now and see what's on the buffet.
13:35Did I ever tell you that you're my hero
13:42Everything, everything I wish I could be
13:47Oh, I can fly higher than an eagle
14:13You know, being on a cruise ship, it's unbelievable.
14:16Everything's wonderful.
14:17I mean, I'm getting to see all the world.
14:19It's not really, it's not work to me.
14:22DJing's not work to me.
14:23When you see me upstairs, 10 o'clock every night
14:25I release everything when I DJ.
14:28I'm a very, very hyperactive type of guy.
14:31When you see me in a club, that's me.
14:33I wake up like that, I go to bed like that.
14:36I know I can be annoying at times.
14:38And I try to pull back.
14:39I really do.
14:40I don't ever mean anything bad by it.
14:43But I'm always, always, always smiling
14:45And always high up and everything like that.
14:49I think it's definitely part of a big plan for me.
14:52I, you know, I don't want to go into the calling thing too deep.
14:57But I thought of maybe becoming an evangelist.
14:59I'd be excellent at it.
15:01I've got the energy.
15:01In fact, I've thought many a times.
15:03And I still think that maybe the reason that the good Lord is saying,
15:06Scotty, you're going to be this ultimate DJ
15:09who can do all these things and has this much energy.
15:12He might just say, snap, one day.
15:14All right, Scotty, you've done your DJing.
15:18Here's an opening for you with Billy Graham.
15:21Whatever.
15:21However the good Lord takes it, I'm like Abraham, man.
15:25I'll do exactly what he says.
15:26He's the man.
15:28You know, fair enough.
15:33Hallelujah.
15:35Hallelujah.
15:37Hallelujah.
15:49I got a response.
15:55And we have some information from who's classifieds.
15:58I just want you to take a look at this letter.
16:00I'll let you read this, Mrs. Goodman.
16:01They basically explained that when the itinerary was booked in 1996,
16:06that there wasn't a preference for the particular itinerary versus Eastern and Western.
16:12Mr. and Mrs. Goodman booked the holiday in February 1996, which is correct,
16:15with the intention of cruising the New Year sailing of the galaxy.
16:18As far as I remember, at no time did my client express a wish to, so long as the New
16:24Year...
16:25It's not true.
16:27I think I've got a death wish.
16:28All right, you ready.
16:29You ready?
16:36Help!
16:37Help!
16:40And so what is celebrity going to do about it?
16:43No, again, Mrs. Goodman, it's not my...
16:44I don't have the authority, number one.
16:47Yes, but there's somebody aboard here, there's a hotel manager, there's a captain,
16:51there's all sorts of people.
16:52Just make the tiniest little gesture.
16:55Just they know how upset I am, and they have done absolutely nothing.
17:00Nothing whatsoever.
17:01The easiest thing in the world is to pass the back along.
17:03Which they have done.
17:04And nobody takes responsibility.
17:06We're not that important.
17:08No, no, no, no, no, no.
17:09Kiss him.
17:10No, kiss him.
17:12Oh, God.
17:13Oh, God.
17:14Oh, you kissed my head off.
17:18That wasn't bad.
17:20Well, it's a very unsatisfactory conclusion.
17:23Most unsatisfactory.
17:24Well, obviously a mistake has been made, but nobody's saying who did it.
17:28That's it.
17:30This, I feel sure, won't be a New Year you'll forget soon.
17:34I shall never forget this cruise.
17:36Never.
17:42But I've got to get some results on this.
17:46It's not what I booked.
17:48And that's the end of the day.
17:50I'm in business.
17:50I know what's what.
17:52It's an experience.
17:54It's definitely an experience.
17:56I know it's an experience.
17:58I know it's an experience.
18:01Oh, God, you won't let me.
18:10I know it's an experience.
18:23Oh, God, you won't let me.
18:40and you learn a lot of things on the cruise every week i always learn so you know there
18:44is a difference what is the difference between a nautical mile and a land mile anybody know
18:50no no they're basically the same thing except a nautical mile is a lot more expensive
18:59what a day this has been
19:11and welcome out to the most beautiful disco in the world how's everybody feeling this evening
19:18we'll try that again how you guys feeling to see me perfect perfect i've had eight hours with scotty
19:33o'brien i'm brain dead he's a love but did he climb falls with him yeah can you imagine
19:42eight hours of scotty o'brien wow it's a test in itself he went down to dinner this evening and
19:46he had his tie and under there and it was pretty dry i went back in the mess at the
19:50end of dinner
19:52he was nearly naked he had his shirt off around his arm his tie was his braces were down here
19:58life and soul this guy but and a great dj i can't i can't live with him
20:03me and scotty jesus beam me up
20:08scotty's in the house white boy dance all white people
20:17i got one more
20:20scotty's in the house
20:24oh oh you're wrong oh my god
20:50let's go
20:52let's go
20:54Let's go!
21:24And one, two, three, four, jump!
21:26Jump, go, wave! Everybody jump, go, wave!
21:29Let's start it! Jump, jump, jump, jump, jump!
21:32Let's start it! Jump, jump, jump! Jump, jump, jump, jump, jump, jump, jump!
21:37Here we go again, here we go again.
21:44Good morning ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Fort Lauderdale, Florida.
21:50This is the first call for all guests disembarking today to please proceed ashore.
21:55We thank you very much, and we wish you a very safe and pleasant journey home.
22:02Bye, thank you.
22:05Thanks.
22:06Uh, Nicky? Nicky?
22:09Nicky? Nicky?
22:10I want you to look real quick.
22:12See the speakers here? I'm leaving these.
22:14Yeah, tell me.
22:15These right here, these are the tapes that I bought on the account for $400.
22:18Great.
22:19What I'm going to do, I'm going to go through the room real quick and check and make sure I
22:22didn't leave anything.
22:23Well, I think any time you deal with people, there's always going to be tough situations.
22:27And with regards to, you know, people coming and going, this is show business.
22:34And show business is like that always, always has been and always will be.
22:38I'll start from the beginning. I'm a man with a lot of energy.
22:41Ask where I get it, I don't know. It's not from drugs like everybody.
22:45That's what all the passengers ask. What do you take, man?
22:47But sometimes I guess that there's a little bit too much of Scotty in this ship.
22:52The clientele itself appreciates it, but there's a couple of people out there that are, you know,
22:57that think five stars and think everybody should be like this.
22:59We just decided to make a little adjustment, a change.
23:03And what is that adjustment?
23:04Well, we've decided that rather than go with Scotty's brand of entertainment, and rightfully so, he's a heck of an
23:13entertainer and a heck of a disc jockey.
23:16Just, I think maybe our approach to that whole venue is going to change a little bit.
23:22And so we decided to bring in somebody else, bring in another personality and give that a try.
23:30You know, I come out and I give it all. I give it 300%.
23:34The average DJ, he'll sit in his booth and he'll just spin records and push buttons.
23:37I get out on the dance floor, as you've seen. I work my butt off. I sweat. I go home.
23:43I wish you could feel my shirt, Chris.
23:44It's soaking, man. It's soaking. It's like I took a shower in it. But I enjoy my work.
23:49I'm the only, probably one of the very few people out here that can just say, I'm not here for
23:52the paycheck. I'm here because I enjoy my job.
23:54It's cruise ships. This stuff happens. You know, people move from one place to the next, and it's just what
24:03happens. It's just part of the gig.
24:08Where's Gail? Did she leave?
24:10She is gone because of change.
24:12Oh, okay. Open and open for me. I'm out.
24:14This is where I'm going to see you, man. This is it.
24:16Let Patrick go through and I'll see you. Goodbye, man.
24:19Good knowing. Take care. Take care, man.
24:22This is far too sentimental. Give me a quick hug and then I'm running away. Bye.
24:27Bye, baby doll. Take care.
24:30Mwah.
24:31Have an Alaska burger for me, bud.
24:32Oh, jeez. Another two and a half pounder got out. Let's go.
24:39I feel sick. Where are you going?
24:41I've got a meeting with Doug today about my ratings. So it's, I mean, this could be it. You know,
24:50it's either stay or...
24:52See ya. You know.
24:54The ratings have got to have improved for you to stay.
24:57Absolutely. You know. So, I'm quite a bit nervous now. You know. This is going to prove whether I can...
25:06Whether I'm good enough to stay with the big boys or go back to production singing or whatever.
25:13Maybe I'm a bit out of my league. I don't know.
25:16Hey.
25:17All right. Chicky, chicky.
25:17Chicky, chicky. No more.
25:19Now mucho paja.
25:23Hello.
25:25Hello.
25:28Hello.
25:37Good news is...
25:40Last cruise, we knocked him dead.
25:43Really?
25:44As far as the ratings.
25:45More good news. You knocked him dead.
25:47Oh.
25:48Cha-ching.
25:49That good stuff?
25:51Ha.
25:51Thank God.
25:52Ha.
25:53Isn't that good?
25:54Oh, that's great.
25:57Really?
25:58Yeah.
25:58Great. Thanks.
26:00Ha. Good for you.
26:02Oh, God. Thank God. That's worked out so well.
26:04I've been really panicking about that.
26:06No, you haven't.
26:07I have.
26:07Really?
26:08Yeah, because I know it's...
26:09Celebrity really go on the ratings, and it's...
26:13And I know that if you get below a certain, you're out.
26:16And that's it. There's no questions asked.
26:18And that's a great way to work for celebrity.
26:21But for the people who work for celebrity, it's a nightmare.
26:24I wasn't comfortable with some of the, uh...
26:27Some of the things that went on, you know.
26:29It's not only my personality is a lot.
26:32You know, sometimes overpowering for some situations.
26:38But it's also the fact that sometimes, you know, I'm...
26:43I was made to feel uncomfortable by certain situations because of that.
26:47You know?
26:48You know, this was...
26:49This ship was very hard to me.
26:50I had to tone down.
26:52The stuff you see in a disco is half of what I got, man.
26:54I really toned down.
26:56So, thank God.
26:58I've done it.
27:00So, that's it.
27:01I'm going off to celebrate now.
27:02See you later.
27:03Yeah.
27:09Yes!
27:13But fair enough.
27:14You know, you love and learn.
27:16You can go on.
27:18God bless you all.
27:30Okay.
27:32Hello.
27:33Are you away then?
27:34Yes, the end of the cruise now, and that's it.
27:37I've just been given a bear.
27:41Commander Chris, his name is.
27:43Edwina's had a child.
27:45That's very quick.
27:46How about who gave you that?
27:48Celebrity cruises, just as a little token, maybe, for the moment.
27:52Where's Edwina now?
27:54I'm afraid she's been packed.
27:57She's been tranquilised.
27:58Yes.
28:01Oh, thanks.
28:02You guys got married?
28:03Bye-bye.
28:03Congratulations.
28:04All the best to you.
28:05See you later.
28:06All right.
28:07Bye-bye.
28:08We just call him, sir.
28:09Just call him.
28:11On her next cruise with the cruise line, Mrs. Goodman was given a complimentary upgrade
28:15to a royal suite.
28:18For her, her husband Mel, and of course, Edwina.
28:22And as for Scotty, well, after staying with his parents for a while in Tampa, Florida,
28:26he's now running his own DJ company in St. Louis, Missouri.
28:30You