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00:00Talkin' West, shortly,
00:04There's a girl who's hunting a race,
00:08Also
00:42Good morning, Florida.
00:44Well, what's good about it?
00:45It's Scott Shannon, and man, it's a cold December day out there.
00:49And you've only got four of them left to finish your Christmas shopping.
00:52But at least Port Everglades is getting one hell of a present this year.
00:56It's a brand new cruise ship, and it's sailing in right now.
00:59She's called the Galaxy, and they say she's the classiest in the world,
01:03with more gadgets than the Starship Enterprise.
01:062,000 lucky, I say lucky, passengers are getting on board this afternoon
01:10to head for a week of Caribbean Christmas sunshine.
01:13Guess we'll just have to wrap up warm,
01:15because at this rate, we're going to have a white Christmas in Florida.
01:32I've worked on cruise ships for about six years now, on and off.
01:35I've been very, very lucky this time to be taken on as a headliner.
01:40For six years, I've been a production singer,
01:43where I've been with a full cast of, like, 14 people.
01:46And there was always this frustration in me that it was never my show,
01:50and now they're giving me a big chance to be top of the bill.
01:57I'm looking forward to the challenge.
01:59I'm ready to show everybody that a girl from Yorkshire can do this.
02:05She says, oh, my God, where's my mother when I need her?
02:11General crew announcement, general crew announcement.
02:15It is 10.41 precisely on the day of our inaugural seven-day Christmas cruise
02:20to the Western Caribbean.
02:22Please, everybody, ensure that you are at your stations
02:25and ready for the final inspection of the ship,
02:28which is now being carried out by the captain on all decks.
02:33Embarkation of passengers will start in two hours,
02:36after they have been through luggage and passport control.
02:39Please know we have a full ship today,
02:41a total of 2,000 passengers.
02:43To repeat, embarkation will commence in two hours.
02:51So, Captain, are you happy with what you're seeing so far?
02:55No.
02:56There's things.
02:57There's still a lot of things to be done,
02:59touching up things, but this is the important part.
03:02You can imagine how many things the passengers notice,
03:06and especially in the hotel side of the ship.
03:08In the nautical side, they don't know much.
03:11But when you put them in the cabin,
03:13they want everything to be in place.
03:15They want everything to be available.
03:16They want everything there and then.
03:18So, you have to take care of them.
03:29Just have your embarkation card ready,
03:32so we can collect it and your tickets.
03:37Welcome aboard.
03:38Hello, ladies.
03:39Got your tickets there, please?
03:41Your tickets, please.
03:42Oh, yeah.
03:43Oh, you have a ticket.
03:49Yes, sir.
03:49We have a nice cocktail right over here.
03:51We have strawberry ducky.
03:53We have peneal order.
03:54And you get to keep the glass for your souvenir.
03:57We'll be turning into the port right now.
04:00Oh, my God.
04:01Look at this.
04:01There it is on the left-hand side.
04:03What a magnificent ship.
04:05Oh, my God.
04:07Just look at that ship.
04:10Oh, my heart's pounding.
04:11Can you hear my heart beating here?
04:13Oh, yes.
04:14I have a ticket today.
04:15I want to sell at least 50 in the first session
04:19and another 50 in the next session.
04:22You won't give up until you've got it, huh?
04:23Oh, no way.
04:24I won't give up a bit, man.
04:26I have the gold to go to.
04:27I have the rich gold, man.
04:30OK, I score peneal order.
04:38Welcome aboard.
04:39Hello.
04:40Your cabin number?
04:42Coming on in droves.
04:45Hey, how are you?
04:47I saw your name.
04:49Good to see you.
04:51How are you?
04:52I'm fine.
04:53Hello.
04:56We're here.
04:57We're back.
04:58Lovely to see you.
04:59Good to see you.
05:00This is my best friend, Jun-C.
05:02Welcome aboard.
05:04Good to see you, man.
05:05What cabin are you in?
05:06Let's get some help for you.
05:07We're back.
05:08Sure, why not?
05:10Hey.
05:13This afternoon in an hour and a half by poolside,
05:16it's at 4.30, ladies and gentlemen,
05:18we're going to do our poolside sail away celebration.
05:22It's on our way to the most beautiful place in the world,
05:25the sunny, tropical Caribbean.
05:29It's on our way to the most beautiful place in the world.
05:30It's on our way to the most beautiful place in the world.
05:31Wait a minute.
05:31We've been drinking wine on the bus all the way to the world.
05:33No kidding.
05:34We'll bring you up to our room.
05:35We've got gin and tonic in this place.
05:37Quiet.
05:39Come on, I tell you.
05:40I can't do anything with her.
05:45How are you?
05:46Hello.
05:46It's lovely to see you.
05:48How many cruises have you been on?
05:49I've lost count.
05:51Because if I told you, it would tell my age, so I don't do that.
05:54A bunch.
05:55Jim will tell.
05:56Jim will tell.
05:56He tells everything.
05:58Listen, when you get your children all grown and on their own,
06:01you can do what you want to do.
06:03It's deck four.
06:06Four.
06:07Now, then, which way am I?
06:09Which deck, right?
06:10I'm on this deck.
06:13I'm in 4-0-5-6.
06:15Where are we?
06:16Which way?
06:1812.
06:1912.
06:20That's 12-0-2.
06:21The other way, I guess.
06:23OK.
06:24All right.
06:25The other way.
06:26I'm this way.
06:28This away.
06:30Oh, this is beautiful.
06:31Look at this.
06:33Are you naked?
06:34Have you got clothes on?
06:36Come on.
06:36Come on.
06:37I thought you brought a camera.
06:38Come in, Dad, boys.
06:39How are you doing?
06:40Yeah.
06:41I was expecting about a thousand more.
06:43Well, we're trying all the ships now.
06:45This makes them all.
06:46Everything celebrity has, we're trying.
06:48Hey, y'all.
06:49Come on up.
06:49I'm great.
06:50Come on up.
06:50We'll give you a drink.
06:52How many cruises all together?
06:5368.
06:5468?
06:55Can't kiss me young.
06:58Hey, y'all.
07:01They can't hear you.
07:03Thank you so much.
07:08Oh, look at this.
07:10Oh, yes.
07:11Oh, I can live with this.
07:14Now, last time I was on here, I had a box downstairs.
07:19And it wasn't even as big as the bathroom.
07:21So I know I've really made it now.
07:23I have a beautiful passenger cabin.
07:38It's not the corridor.
07:40But this is absolutely beautiful.
07:42It's a long ship, isn't it?
07:43A very long ship.
07:44Especially if you're walking backwards.
07:49Bless him.
07:50This is our first drink, yeah?
07:51Yes, sir.
07:52Oh, bravo.
07:55Yeah, right, man.
07:56Get you all in or off, man.
08:01Look at you.
08:02Hello, sweetheart.
08:04How are you?
08:04So good to see you.
08:06Thank you, guys.
08:06How are you doing?
08:07I'm so happy.
08:08I'm so happy.
08:09How are you keeping it?
08:09You are right?
08:10Yeah, sound, sound.
08:11How long do you mean for?
08:12Four weeks.
08:13I don't know.
08:14Can't believe it.
08:22Amanda was a wonderful dancer.
08:24She was...
08:24I remember Amanda from, you know, we go back a few years.
08:27We were in the same shows.
08:28We were in the same shows.
08:29Yes.
08:30You know.
08:30We don't look it, are we?
08:32We're quite young, really.
08:33But, uh, wonderful.
08:35You've got to get these legs before you go, you know.
08:37Fab legs.
08:39They go right up to a...
08:40Oh, yes.
08:42Superb.
08:43I used to have legs that went up to here, and now I've got a butt that goes down to
08:47there.
08:47So we don't show those anymore.
09:06If you have any questions about your safety on board, do not hesitate to ask one of the
09:10ship's officers.
09:31Yes, sir, we have a nice cocktail right over here.
09:34We have strawberry ducky, we have pinaquilada, and you get to keep the glass for your souvenir.
09:53085.
09:53085.
09:54085.
09:54We're just holding now.
09:56All the way.
09:58Hello, folks.
09:59How are you doing?
10:00Fine, how are you?
10:01All right.
10:02Enjoying the sail away.
10:17Thank you very much.
10:23You're welcome.
10:42We're leaving, it is a little bit sad because I'm leaving my other half where he is.
10:48But I'm used to leaving people now, so it doesn't get any easier though.
10:52But I will see him on Christmas Eve.
10:54He's going to fly out to Mexico and see me there, so it should be exciting.
10:59But we're saying goodbye, sail away, so we're off to warmer climates, bright sunshine, sun tans, naked-bodied, things like
11:06that.
11:07Looking forward to it.
11:10All right, everybody, it's time to go to the Caribbean!
11:13Ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole, ole.
11:39Four more nights tonight.
11:41Captain's table, star captain's table.
11:43Had a very busy day, so it's kind of a rush to get ready for them before the cocktail party.
11:52It's a bad hair day.
11:56I have to get to the can of hairspray quick before it all flops.
12:01This is the thing.
12:02It doesn't take very long.
12:05My stomach is like...
12:07It's a wonder you can't hear it.
12:10It's just, er...
12:13It's just a nightmare.
12:14The size of the stage and the theatre and...
12:18It's all...
12:20I get nervous about everything.
12:22I'm terrible about forgetting words.
12:23I forget words an awful lot.
12:26And, er...
12:27I'll probably forget them tonight, there's no doubt.
12:29But I'll just improvise like I usually do.
12:32Make my own words up as I go along.
12:35But, erm...
12:36Just, and everything, I...
12:38I want the people to enjoy what I do big time.
12:41I want them to really get into what I do and enjoy what I give to them, you know?
12:46So, now we're on our way to see the captain, just to, erm...
12:51You know, make sure this table arrangement is okay for his table on second seating.
12:58So, come on.
13:03One more, baby.
13:04This is it, and I'm deserting you.
13:07We told the guys we'd be back in 15 minutes.
13:09We've got to hurry.
13:10We've got to wait for this morning to hurry.
13:18The point is Mr and Mrs Caparis at the table.
13:22Yes.
13:22Yes, I put Mrs Caparis on your left.
13:26And, er, Lady MacRindle I put on your right.
13:29Good.
13:29And Sir Robert is on, erm, Tina's right.
13:32Excellent.
13:331-2-3-4-5.
13:351-2-3-4-5.
13:371-2-3-4-5.
13:381-2-3-4-5.
13:38I'll be fine once I get out there.
13:401-2-3-4-5.
13:44And I haven't got my mother here to calm me down like she usually is.
13:48You know, she usually gives me a good talk until before I go on.
13:52But I'm going to have to learn to stand on my own two feet sooner or later.
13:57I can feel her, you know, sending thoughts out to me, and that is great.
14:02I know she's with me out there, you know.
14:05And, of course, my dad, who died three years ago, unfortunately.
14:08He's definitely with me.
14:09I really feel him with me.
14:11Because he was with me so much before.
14:14But I feel he's just as much with me now.
14:18You know.
14:19So you've got it, as they say.
14:21You've got the, er...
14:22Yeah, the powers.
14:23The powers.
14:24Mmm.
14:24Oh, God, I have, yeah.
14:26Which is a great gift also.
14:28I mean, I've been blessed with two gifts.
14:30So I'm very, very lucky.
14:34All right!
14:35Maybe she'll win a million dollars while you're filming her.
14:38I'm going to try this one.
14:39That'd be good for us, too.
14:40She'd buy me a drink.
14:41She'd buy me a drink.
14:42She'd buy us all drinks.
14:43This is a bad machine.
14:46It's a loser. Let's go.
14:48She almost put my eye out.
14:51We have dinner and dancing yet.
14:54Wait till you see her dance.
14:55Really?
14:57Where are you going?
15:00My mouth's getting ever so dry now.
15:01That's the nerves.
15:04Oh, God.
15:08This is an art in itself.
15:10Are you missing your man?
15:11I'm missing terribly my man.
15:13Mind you, I'm glad he's not seen me like this.
15:15He's never seen me before a show or...
15:18You know, getting ready for it and things.
15:21He only knows me as plain Jane, which is quite sweet, really.
15:25I like that.
15:26He just knows me as his girlfriend.
15:27So he doesn't really know the Jane, the singer, the big act or anything.
15:33Which is nice because I know he's fallen for me and not the image of what I do.
15:39Which has been a problem sometimes in the past.
15:42I suppose I am difficult to live with because I am quite selfish.
15:49Well, I'm a lot selfish, not quite.
15:51So I tend to forget the partner a lot.
15:54They give me all this attention.
15:55They've always got to be there for me.
15:57And I've not reciprocated and given them that back, which is very selfish of me.
16:02And I apologise.
16:04Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce...
16:07Mrs. Correz, Mr. and Mrs. Hines.
16:10Nice to meet you.
16:11Mr. Roberts and Lady McRindle.
16:14Captain Correz, Mrs. Correz.
16:16The table is ready, so if you'd like to follow me through to the dining room, OK?
16:28Hello.
16:29Oh, look who she is.
16:30We are ready for this night.
16:32That's Chris.
16:32Ladies and gentlemen, as we enjoy a scrumptious dinner in the fabulous Orion Restaurant, let me remind you that tonight
16:39in the Celebrity Theatre, we have British singing sensation Jane MacDonald, a show absolutely positively not to be missed.
16:48Tonight, after we eat, on the way, if we have time, we'll put a few little quarters in the slot
16:53machines.
16:54We're going to the show, and when the show is over, if we have time, we'll put a few little
16:58more quarters in the slot machines.
17:00I wouldn't miss that.
17:02I'd love to make it rich and famous, so I can get my brother out of the pit.
17:05That's the big thing I want.
17:07He works in the night.
17:08Yeah, he does. He works at Selby.
17:11So, er, our jobs are so completely different.
17:15I've got such a glamorous job, and, er, he works, like, 12-hour shifts down a hole all day.
17:22And, er, I just find it a bit unnerving, that, really.
17:26So I'd like to, sort of, look after my family a bit, if I could.
17:31He's actually at the coalface, is he?
17:32Mm.
17:33He's moving down there now, which I'm not happy about, really.
17:37He wants the best for his family, I suppose, and, like we all do.
17:42Fate's got a funny way of working.
17:44I don't think there's such a thing as coincidence.
17:46I think everything is planned.
17:48So if I don't make it to the top, then it's meant to be.
17:54But I've tried. I will have tried.
17:59Anyway, that's negative. I am going to make it to the top.
18:01That's right.
18:02Done right.
18:05After all, Liz.
18:22And we now kindly invite you to take your seats in just a few moments.
18:26It will be showtime.
18:31Let's go.
18:55I got a hundred that time.
18:58I got a hundred. Look, look at this pocket.
18:59It's a flowy.
18:59I got a hundred that time.
18:59I got a hundred pounds!
19:00Look, look, look at this pocket, and then it's a store right now.
19:03Look, this line.
19:05That's blue.
19:20Did you see that she came in here with this huge amount of money to gamble
19:28right she's made so much money she's paying me back already now that's a that's a first
20:02good evening ladies and gentlemen
20:04please won't you welcome your cruise director mr. Doug Jones
20:17good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome aboard the most beautiful cruise ship in the world
20:22celebrity cruises galaxy and ladies and gentlemen we have so much in store for you
20:28before we continue with our show I'd like to introduce you to the most important people on the ship and
20:33I'm talking about all of you
20:35I'd like to have the house lights come up and I'd like you to turn to the person next to
20:38you preferably somebody that you don't know and introduce yourself
20:44there are no strangers in the world galaxy just friends that you have not met
20:49well indeed I do have a few friends I'd like to introduce you to but before we do that we
20:54are going to introduce our wonderful orchestra
20:57the celebrity orchestra help put us in the mood gentlemen take it away
21:15and have a spicy bloody mary please spicy very spicy oh spicy very very spicy
21:30I could be sick right now I'll be honest with you I could just throw up
21:33in fact I might do
21:36Martin don't forget loads of reverb Whitney
21:40loads of swimming in reverb on that Whitney
21:44snorkel flippers everything
21:46snorkel flippers everything
21:47thanks
21:51we all did this
21:54listen Jane I want to make a nice introduction
21:56have you had any hits?
21:58do you have any hits?
21:59did it?
22:00no I'm just single I went to number two in the US charts
22:02okay well we'll uh
22:04we'll lead with that and then we'll say something like
22:07give me a great venue like
22:10can I say Palladium?
22:12well I've never actually played it
22:14I've seen it on TV
22:14okay well that play didn't count
22:17whatever
22:19people in Britain I have not done the Palladium but
22:22the people in America don't know that
22:25Vodka Sprite
22:27ha ha ha
22:29ha ha ha
22:29all right
22:31ha ha ha
22:37oh god
22:41I'll be glad when it's midnight tonight
22:46why do I get so nervous every time?
22:48I can't understand this
22:52oh Jesus
22:58come on
22:59come on
23:00come on Jane
23:00come on
23:02good evening ladies and gentlemen
23:03good evening
23:05good evening
23:05well this is it
23:07thank you sweet
23:08help us win
23:09help us win
23:10but to start our show we truly have a rising star
23:14from uh
23:15the United Kingdom England
23:17and she has certainly hit the top of the charts in England
23:19and recently she had a number two hit on the United States charts
23:23and the CD player very pleased to have her with us
23:26won't you please welcome our star
23:27Miss Jane McDonald
23:29one
23:30two
23:30three
23:31three
23:32three
23:34three
23:36three
23:36three
23:37three
23:39on a clear day
23:41rise and look around you
23:44and you'll see who
23:47you are
23:51on a clear day
23:53how it will astound you
23:56that was 15
23:59that was 15
24:00that was 15
24:01that was 15
24:01that was 15
24:03day
24:06I think I can make it now the pain has gone
24:13all of the bad feelings I've disappeared
24:17and I
24:22will always
24:24love you
24:26I
24:29will always
24:31love you
24:36you
24:39guess what
24:40so is mama
24:43all I want you to do for me
24:45is give it to me right now
24:47get on
24:47baby
24:49hey
24:50hey
24:50get on
24:51I'll pick myself up
24:54and get back in the race
24:57that's life
24:58oh
24:59I can't deny it
25:02I thought I'd quit
25:04but my heart just won't bite
25:07this is the moment
25:10down all the yards
25:14this day I'll never
25:16I'll sit forever
25:18with the courts
25:21I won't look back
25:24the greatest moment
25:35of them
25:38heart
25:39or
25:48heart
25:49heart
25:49heart
25:52goodnight
25:53god bless you all
25:53thank you
25:55ladies and gentlemen
25:56Jane Mcdonald!
26:05Miss Jane Mcdonald!
26:11Jane Mcdonald!
26:23Thank God for that!
26:25How are they? How are they? How are they? How are they?
26:27How are they? How are they? How are they?
26:28This evening here aboard Galaxy on this, our first night together,
26:33I have some good news and also just a little bit of bad news before you go.
26:38I feel fine now.
26:41First of all, the good news.
26:43If you're in the mood to go and do a little bit of gambling,
26:46they are just giving money away in the casino tonight.
26:50And go down, crash out.
26:53I'm tired today.
26:56It's been a tiring day, hasn't it?
26:58Yeah, I've been working hard today.
27:01Good day? Bad day?
27:04Not really. Good day, but a week early this morning we have a meeting.
27:10See how next show goes.
27:13See how the ratings go. That's the big thing, isn't it?
27:16Because if you don't make the ratings, you're off.
27:18And that's the good news. There's much coming up this evening, a great day tomorrow.
27:22They put a sheet in everybody's cabin and they have to fill in what they think about the entertainment.
27:29So if they don't like you and you get a low rating, you're fired.
27:33And now for the bad news.
27:36Well, ladies and gentlemen, here aboard Galaxy, and most certainly on the inaugural cruise, there is no bad news.
27:42Thanks for coming. Have a wonderful time.
27:48We thank you, dear Lord, for this day you have given us, oh God.
27:52You can do everything, oh God, and I'm asking you, dear Lord, for what I need, oh God.
27:58Lord Jesus, I'm asking you, Lord, to bless me, oh God.
28:04I'm asking you to bless the captain, oh God.
28:06The navigation officers, oh God.
28:08Zero to zero three.
28:10Bless the bar manager, oh God.
28:12The supervisor, oh God.
28:14And all the crew members, guide and keep us, oh God.
28:17He was the victory, oh God.
28:18You know you cannot do nothing without you, oh God.
28:21Goodnight.
28:22You are the mighty God.
28:23You are the everlasting Father, oh God.
28:26Christmas coming, oh God.
28:28I'm asking you to bless each and every one of us, oh God.
28:31Bless my family, oh God.
28:33Bless my wife.
28:34My kids, my mothers, my brothers, my sisters, my church now.
28:40Just see those sleigh bells jingle and ring, jingle, jingle.