00:03This is where it all started four years ago.
00:58This is where it all started.
01:10She gave me an apple.
01:56You know, when we first met, I thought you looked like those kids from
01:59expensive art schools, like the ones they put in their brochures.
02:03The face of CSM.
02:05Exactly.
02:07What did I look like?
02:09I don't know. Special.
02:12Right.
02:15You didn't look generic, but you definitely looked arty.
02:20Do you want to see some of my drawings?
02:22Sure.
02:23Sorry, I don't want to be boring.
02:26You know me.
02:31Wow.
02:36They're nice.
02:41Oh, that's my mum.
02:44She looks like you.
02:48Her friend thought she was one of those Asian nannies taking care of white kids.
02:52Her friend?
02:54I mean, before they became friends.
02:56That's not very nice.
02:58Yeah.
02:59But children used to call me Chinese girl at school, so it's not clear whether I look Asian
03:04or not.
03:05So you got the best of both worlds?
03:08Yeah, I guess.
03:11I'm so sorry.
03:16Lucy became my entire life for four years.
03:21All right.
03:21Maybe not my entire life, but a good, you know, 95% of my life.
03:27Or maybe I wasn't that pathetic.
03:31Maybe 85%.
03:33I can't figure out what's that.
03:47I don't know about her.
03:51I can't figure out.
03:56What's that, baby?
04:00I've seen her.
04:02I can't figure out how to go with her.
04:05I'm going to be very careful.
04:07But no, my God, I'm not going to die.
04:12Okay.
04:13Yeah.
04:15Listen, the work, it's...
04:18They're partying, and honestly, I don't know if they're going to stay.
04:26Well, I'm sorry.
04:28How do I get you to rembourses, you and dad?
04:32I can't.
04:33I can't, Mom. I can't get there.
04:38Yes, it's not a problem.
04:45No.
04:46No, it's okay.
04:52Bye.
05:13All right.
05:16All right.
05:17All right.
05:19All right.
05:21We're in person every 18 seconds.
05:22So in the time it takes to watch a 90-minute soccer match, 293 people would have died on average.
05:30The US, the worst affected country by far.
05:43You're looking different.
05:46I asked for strawberry blonde, but it became ginger.
05:49Can you believe that?
05:50Really?
05:51Yes.
05:56Are you tipsy?
06:00I drank a little bit today.
06:03With friends?
06:04No.
06:05Obviously not.
06:08I shouldn't be here.
06:10You're right.
06:12Sorry for making you break the law.
06:15But it's just me here.
06:17I'm not seeing anyone.
06:19Bloody hope so.
06:22All right, Isabelle.
06:24Why'd you get me to come here?
06:25What's going on?
06:27I hate when you call me Isabelle.
06:31Your mum named you Isabelle.
06:33I always queep.
06:34She looked beautiful that evening.
06:37I should never have broken up with her.
06:39What the fuck am I supposed to call you?
06:42You mean a lot to me.
06:45Don't do that, Belle.
06:47Sorry.
06:48Should I make us some coffee?
06:50It's a bit late for coffee.
06:53What do you mean?
06:54It's never too late for coffee.
06:55I'm fine.
07:02Sorry.
07:04How was work?
07:07Nothing special.
07:08How about you?
07:11I've been furloughed.
07:13But I got other offers as a freelancer.
07:18I just got lucky.
07:20It's not because of my talent.
07:23You know, I see these other illustrators I went to school with and they're so fucking good and it's just
07:30making me question everything I do.
07:33I was just drowning my confusion in alcohol today.
07:38Really?
07:39Is that why?
07:41Yeah.
07:42Yeah.
07:43I feel ashamed that I'm not doing what I love.
07:46I'm just too scared.
07:47It's never working out.
07:50Oh, wait.
07:51I have something for you.
08:01I didn't do it yesterday?
08:05There's a ceremony.
08:06Um...
08:06yeah.
08:07Er...
08:07this is nice.
08:10You don't like it?
08:12It's lovely.
08:13Listen I need to go.
08:15Well.
08:16No, stay.
08:20You know what? This is your problem.
08:23You get me to come over here and just talk about yourself.
08:26That's not normal, you do realise that.
08:32Oh my God.
08:38I know I make mistakes all the time.
08:41That's why I asked you here.
08:42I won't say how sorry I am.
08:48I want to be with you.
08:51You don't know how to be with anyone.
08:53Well, I love you.
08:56Don't do that.
09:13I don't know.
09:14I don't know.
09:21I don't know.
09:35I don't know.
09:36I don't know.
10:32I don't know.
10:36I don't know.
10:50This is where it all ends.
11:17I needed a change.
11:20I thought, every day I am going to have coffee and water, exactly in that order.
11:28It's like winding up a clock, you know, setting myself straight, working, forgetting.
12:06It's amazing.
12:14It's amazing.
12:17It's amazing.
12:46It's amazing.
12:52And this is how it starts again.
13:10It's amazing.
13:12It's amazing.
13:12It's amazing.
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