- 2 days ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
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00:00:25Jesus.
00:00:26Mom?
00:00:27Can you at least warn me when you're gonna do that?
00:00:30Please?
00:00:30Oh, please.
00:00:32Don't be such a child.
00:00:33Do you still have the Wand of Light?
00:00:45See?
00:00:46The all-powerful magic heirloom.
00:00:48Still safe and sound.
00:00:49Well, you should be more careful.
00:00:51The Wand of Light has the power to grant its user their deepest desires.
00:00:56Yeah.
00:00:56And if it falls into the wrong hands, it would become the most dangerous weapon in the world.
00:01:03But a marriage to another noble witch family would only strengthen your power.
00:01:08Yeah.
00:01:09Unless it's an evil Svensson, right?
00:01:12The Svensons are our worst enemies, Leona.
00:01:15Do you know how much our family has suffered over the centuries because of them?
00:01:20I know.
00:01:22Sorry.
00:01:23You are the guardian of the Wand of Light, Leona.
00:01:27And you can't reach your full potential until you marry and succeed me as head of the family.
00:01:33Come home with a husband next week or I will pick one for you.
00:01:37What?
00:01:37Mom, no.
00:01:39Please don't.
00:01:40Leona Sherwood, you are getting married whether you like the boy I pick or not.
00:01:45Mom, please.
00:01:45Understand?
00:01:49Don't worry, Mom.
00:01:51I'm the responsible daughter.
00:01:52Remember?
00:02:00Okay, Leona Sherwood.
00:02:03This is your last weekend of freedom.
00:02:09For two more nights.
00:02:11Fuck my responsibility.
00:02:14I'm gonna have some fun.
00:02:29That would be $25.
00:02:31I think you mean it's on the house, right?
00:02:36Right.
00:02:37It's on the house.
00:02:56There you are, little Miss Sherwood.
00:03:06Where the hell are you?
00:03:07I'm in Vegas like I said it would be, old man.
00:03:09Hey, don't you get smart with me, you little shit.
00:03:12Remember your mission.
00:03:14Seduce the Sherwood heir and marry her, and then that whole obnoxious family will be there to pay off our
00:03:20debts.
00:03:20You mean your debts.
00:03:22Quiet!
00:03:23It's bad enough that I have a sorry excuse for an heir.
00:03:26You are an embarrassment to the Spence in name.
00:03:29Now, let's go.
00:03:29Now, if you don't marry the Sherwood girl like I told you, I am going to sell your little sister
00:03:35off to old Fitzgerald to be his fourth wife.
00:03:38Dad.
00:03:39Dad's secret is just a kid.
00:03:41When I want your opinion, I will ask for it.
00:03:44Until then, you shut up and do as I say.
00:03:47Do you understand?
00:03:49Yeah.
00:03:50I understand.
00:03:51Good!
00:03:52And you!
00:03:53Keep practicing!
00:03:55You sound god-awful!
00:03:58Heartless fucking bastard.
00:04:13It's two of us.
00:04:15You're saying you don't remember me?
00:04:17Who remembers shit we did as dumb teens anyways?
00:04:20No way.
00:04:21Totally.
00:04:22I love that show.
00:04:23I watched it in one sitting at like 2am.
00:04:26This is one of my favorites.
00:04:27It definitely doesn't get the love that it deserves.
00:04:29But I think it's one of the best ones.
00:04:31Really?
00:04:33I never begged you for a sappy romance kind of guy.
00:04:38Looks can be deceiving.
00:04:44The wand of light.
00:04:46So it does exist.
00:04:48Maybe I'm just jaded.
00:04:50It's hard to believe that love like that actually exists in real life.
00:04:53Why not?
00:04:54We're witches.
00:04:55Monsters and magic exist in our world.
00:04:58Why can't true love?
00:05:01I'm Lili, by the way.
00:05:04Lili Collins.
00:05:07Eric Phillips.
00:05:09Nice to meet you, Lili Collins.
00:05:12Damn.
00:05:13He's hot.
00:05:14And I'm in Vegas.
00:05:15I deserve a little fun.
00:05:16Well, Eric Phillips.
00:05:19I'll be in the poker room tonight.
00:05:21Maybe I'll see you there.
00:05:23Maybe.
00:05:42Okay, Svenson.
00:05:44Don't fuck this up.
00:05:58Eric motherfucking Svensson
00:06:01Excuse me?
00:06:02You ghosted me for three months after sleeping with me
00:06:04And you think you can sit there and act like nothing happened?
00:06:07I think you've got me confused with someone else
00:06:09Don't gaslight me, Svensson
00:06:11I know exactly who you are
00:06:27You know who she is?
00:06:29I think she's got me confused with someone else
00:06:35Thank you
00:06:43You nervous?
00:06:45Not at all
00:06:47You can always fold, you know
00:06:48I'd hate to send you home empty-handed
00:06:53Not a chance
00:06:55I'm here to win
00:06:57You sure?
00:06:58Seems like your focus is somewhere else
00:07:01Oh
00:07:02I am
00:07:04Very focused
00:07:07Are you guys done
00:07:08Making goo-go eyes at each other or what?
00:07:12You're full of shit, Phillips
00:07:13I call
00:07:15Yeah, there is no way that you have this
00:07:18But don't worry
00:07:20I'll let you go another round
00:07:22Once I beat you
00:07:23Actually
00:07:24I think I'm about to hit the jackpot
00:07:29Eric?
00:07:50I've wanted to do that
00:07:51Since I saw you by the pool in your bikini
00:07:53Eric, everyone can see
00:07:56Do you want me to stop?
00:08:12Let's see
00:08:13Let him watch
00:08:16Give him a show
00:08:28Wait, please don't stop
00:08:30Use your words
00:08:33Tell me what you want
00:08:34I want your tongue inside me
00:08:37Please
00:08:37That's a good girl
00:08:45Eric
00:08:49Wait
00:08:49Wait, I think I'm gonna
00:08:53Was that some kind of vision?
00:08:57No
00:08:58That was from him
00:09:08Lucky son of a bitch
00:09:10Beginner Lux
00:09:11Let's see you do it again next hand
00:09:14No can do
00:09:16I have a date with a
00:09:18Very pretty lady
00:09:24Why do I have the feeling
00:09:25That you're not exactly as you present
00:09:28Eric
00:09:29Phillips
00:09:30It is Vegas
00:09:33Isn't that part of the fun?
00:09:46You know
00:09:47It wasn't very nice of you
00:09:49To tease me with your strap of your dress during our game
00:09:54It's very distracting
00:09:57Well you know it wasn't very nice of you
00:10:00To send me that little vision during our game
00:10:02I just wanted to give you a little sneak preview
00:10:09Eric, there are people
00:10:15And if you're quiet
00:10:17They won't see you
00:10:21I should stop
00:10:22This wasn't how the plan was supposed to go
00:10:24You know you were right before
00:10:26I'm not who I say I am
00:10:28And who out there is exactly
00:10:30As they present
00:10:32But I am
00:10:33Look I don't care who you are outside of this
00:10:36For once in my life
00:10:38I
00:10:39I just want to forget about everything
00:10:42Just live in the moment
00:10:44And I think you
00:10:47Can help me do that
00:10:55Remove the camouflage
00:10:57I want you to see you
00:10:59The real you
00:11:02But then you'll know who I am
00:11:04I already know who you are
00:11:06The real you
00:11:09Wants to let go
00:11:15No one's ever looked at me like that
00:11:17He really wants me
00:11:19The real me
00:11:21Fuck
00:11:23You are gorgeous
00:11:27I want you, Eric
00:11:30I need you
00:11:32I need you
00:11:35Spread your legs for me
00:11:41Keep your eyes open
00:11:44I want you to watch yourself come
00:11:47All over my fingers
00:11:53Keep your eyes open
00:11:59I thought you said that they couldn't hear me
00:12:02They can't if you stay quiet
00:12:03Keep your eyes open
00:12:05Keep your eyes open
00:12:06Or I'll stop
00:12:11That's a good girl
00:12:12Look down at my head
00:12:19Oh my god, they hurt me
00:12:21I can't
00:12:22Just relax
00:12:25I can't, Eric
00:12:27It's okay
00:12:28Don't think
00:12:31Just fail
00:12:33Tell me how you feel
00:12:35So good
00:12:36But I need more
00:12:38Eric
00:12:42You feel so good
00:12:44I can't wait to put my mouth on you
00:12:48I'm sorry I'm going to make you come
00:12:51I'll beat you there
00:12:53I'm going to go down
00:12:54I want you to scream my name
00:12:57Let it come
00:12:57Five
00:12:59Four
00:13:01Three
00:13:03Two
00:13:07Four
00:13:28I can't believe I just came on his hand
00:13:31In front of other people
00:13:33I think this is your floor
00:13:41I'll be at the fountain tomorrow
00:13:43At eight o'clock
00:13:45If you decide that you want more
00:13:47See you there
00:13:58How does he know what floor I was on?
00:14:05So you've told me all about your wild sister
00:14:08And the things that she's done
00:14:11What about you?
00:14:13Me?
00:14:15I'm the responsible sister
00:14:17The boring one, if you will
00:14:20And I do what I'm supposed to do
00:14:22All the rules and all that good stuff
00:14:25I don't believe you
00:14:26I mean
00:14:27I know how you are
00:14:28At an elevator
00:14:29Oh come on
00:14:32Come on
00:14:33It's Vegas
00:14:35Let me be your bad influence
00:14:37Just for tonight
00:14:40So
00:14:42Any bad ideas?
00:14:47Just one
00:14:54What are you doing?
00:14:56What are you doing?
00:15:11No games
00:15:12Just fuck me already
00:15:14I thought I would try to woo you first
00:15:16Consider me wooed
00:15:17You think we could take it slow?
00:15:19Your lips say one thing
00:15:21But your body says something else
00:15:35Wait
00:15:37Shit
00:15:38I almost lost my cool
00:15:40I gotta remember the plan
00:15:44Oh my god
00:15:45I can't believe I just did that
00:15:47That was so embarrassing
00:15:48This is why I don't do crazy shit
00:15:50That was way too much
00:15:51Hey
00:15:52You're never too much
00:15:53You don't understand, Eric
00:15:55Okay, if my family saw me do any of that
00:15:57They would freak out
00:15:59Tonight's not about your family
00:16:01Tonight's about you
00:16:02Remember?
00:16:03Forget what everyone else has told you to do
00:16:06Do something that you want to do
00:16:08Something no one would expect
00:16:10Maybe he's right
00:16:11I've spent my whole life doing what my family's told me to do
00:16:18For once in my life
00:16:20I'm doing something for myself
00:16:22She spotted the chapel
00:16:25Just like I planned
00:16:29So are you, uh
00:16:30You sure about this marriage thing?
00:16:32It's only temporary
00:16:33Okay, and old magic is weak
00:16:35The hand fast bond will probably only last till the morning
00:16:38So
00:16:39Are you ready for a holy matrimony?
00:16:42I'm ready if you're ready
00:16:45Come on
00:16:49Let's go
00:16:55You nervous?
00:16:57Just
00:16:58Never been married before
00:17:07Uh, it's my sister
00:17:08I need to take this
00:17:09Oh, yeah
00:17:10Take your time
00:17:11Elvis here wants me to pick out a hand fast bouquet
00:17:13Hey mama
00:17:14Let's get some flowers for you
00:17:15Come on
00:17:15Let's do it
00:17:17You need to come home
00:17:18Now
00:17:19I can't
00:17:20Secret
00:17:20Eric, dad's up to something
00:17:22He invited Fitzgerald to the house
00:17:24And made me dress up
00:17:25He looks at me weird
00:17:27It really freaks me out
00:17:28You were my big brother, E
00:17:30I need you
00:17:31Here
00:17:31Listen, I can't leave right now
00:17:33But I promise
00:17:34When I come home
00:17:35I'll have enough power to get rid of dad forever
00:17:37Okay?
00:17:41Hey
00:17:43Is everything okay?
00:17:45Yeah
00:17:48Yeah, it's fine
00:17:51You, uh
00:17:51You sure about this?
00:17:54It's only temporary
00:17:56Come on
00:17:57We'll be laughing about this for years
00:18:02Let's go
00:18:17Right
00:18:18Only temporary
00:18:20Unless you get hand fasted under a full moon
00:18:22Then the hand fast bond is
00:18:24Nearly unbreakable
00:18:26But she doesn't know that
00:18:27And once she does
00:18:29She'll hate me
00:18:31Is your sister okay?
00:18:33Is something wrong?
00:18:36Nothing's wrong
00:18:36We're about to get married in Vegas by Ovis
00:18:40What could possibly be wrong?
00:18:43Alright, you ready to rock and roll
00:18:44You hunk a hunk a hot couple?
00:18:47Let's get this show started
00:18:49Woo!
00:19:16Oh!
00:19:17This is it.
00:19:18I have the wand of light the most powerful object in the world if I leave now
00:19:24I could use it to take control away from my father set secret and I free
00:19:35But I already betrayed her once
00:19:47I fixed her to each other
00:19:49d tu tu
00:19:49d tu
00:19:49d tu
00:19:56y
00:20:06duen
00:20:07d tu
00:20:08d tu
00:20:19I'll have to get more chocolate strawberries.
00:20:21Be back soon.
00:20:32It's only temporary.
00:20:33Okay, and old magic is weak.
00:20:35The Han-Fast Bond will probably only last till the morning.
00:20:39That's weird.
00:20:41The mark should have worn off by now.
00:20:51So, did you marry the girl yet?
00:20:57No, it's...
00:20:59Complicated.
00:21:00Complicated?
00:21:01Or distracted?
00:21:03You were sent there to marry the Sherwood heir
00:21:06and bind her power to this family,
00:21:08not to play house.
00:21:10You're a Svensson.
00:21:11Act like one.
00:21:12Eric is a Svensson?
00:21:15I married my family's worst enemy?
00:21:18I don't need you to tell me what I am.
00:21:21Then stop hesitating.
00:21:22If the rumors about the wand of light are true,
00:21:25we might catch an even bigger prize.
00:21:28So hurry up and marry the Sherwood girl
00:21:30and then bring her to me!
00:21:33Idiot!
00:21:41He's been lying this whole time.
00:21:49I need to tell her the truth.
00:21:53You lying piece of cruel shit!
00:21:56You didn't want me.
00:21:57You just wanted the fucking wand, didn't you?
00:22:01I didn't even know the wand existed until I met you.
00:22:03You still lied to me, Eric.
00:22:05You knew I was a Sherwood from the start!
00:22:07That's why you gave me a fake fucking name, right?
00:22:09Okay, I did, but that was before we...
00:22:11Before you decided to mess with me!
00:22:13Get your dick wet before you ruin me and my family forever!
00:22:17I'm not trying to ruin your family!
00:22:18I'm trying to save mine!
00:22:19Oh!
00:22:20I know all about you, Svensons!
00:22:22All you do is lie and cheat and steal to get whatever you fucking want!
00:22:27I should have caught it at the poker table, but your little tricks won't work on me this time!
00:22:32The hand fast mark, it'll fade!
00:22:35Just like you!
00:22:36Just like whatever this was!
00:22:38The hand fast wasn't a trick!
00:22:40Not that part!
00:22:41Not with you!
00:22:42It doesn't matter, Eric.
00:22:45You will never, ever get the wand!
00:22:49Lily, what?
00:22:51When this fades, Eric, I will never have to see you again!
00:23:08So...
00:23:09That didn't happen.
00:23:12My older sister Effie told me that the mark would fade a week later.
00:23:16Then a month went by...
00:23:19Then...
00:23:21Well...
00:23:25See, this is where you don't fuck with old magic.
00:23:27It's all fun and games, so there's a full moon.
00:23:30Then it's the most powerful magic in the universe.
00:23:37Apparently, getting hand fast married under a full moon creates a bond that's almost unbreakable.
00:23:44Also, apparently, the almost part means that both people have to perform the divorce spell.
00:23:52I tried calling.
00:23:54Texting.
00:23:55Sending flying monkeys.
00:23:57Nothing.
00:23:58Not a single word from my beloved husband.
00:24:02For half a year.
00:24:12Yes, I still sleep with a wand under my pillow.
00:24:16The emotional ass whooping I got from my mother for getting hand fasted to a stranger was bad enough.
00:24:22No one can ever find out that I almost lost the wand too.
00:24:25I just need one night...
00:24:28To sleep without...
00:24:30Thinking about him.
00:24:54Who are you?
00:24:55What do you want with the wand of light?
00:24:58Nothing.
00:24:59I'm just here to collect my payday from my client once I bring him that wand.
00:25:04Payday.
00:25:05Someone sent you.
00:25:07Who?
00:25:08I'm afraid I can't break client confidentiality.
00:25:10Sorry, sweetie.
00:25:13Well, I'm afraid that you chose the wrong witch to fuck with tonight.
00:25:16Who?
00:25:19No.
00:25:21Come on.
00:25:24Who?
00:25:25No!
00:25:26No!
00:25:26No!
00:25:27No!
00:25:27No!
00:25:28No!
00:25:29Lea!
00:25:34No!
00:25:35No, no no!
00:25:38No!
00:25:39No!
00:25:41No!
00:25:44No, no!
00:25:53What the fuck?
00:26:08Get off me! She had the wand!
00:26:11I got the wand. I'll get the rest later.
00:26:16No!
00:26:20You are the reason I lost the wand. Who are you?
00:26:29The hand fast mark.
00:26:34Hello, wife. Miss me?
00:26:39What are you doing here?
00:26:41Well, you know, I thought I'd spice up our marriage, do a little role-playing, but it looks like you're
00:26:45more into bondage. I didn't know you were so kinky.
00:26:48Shut up!
00:26:53You should be thanking me. I did just save your house.
00:26:55I'm thanking you. You're the reason my family's most powerful heirloom is gone. How did you even find me?
00:27:02Wait a minute.
00:27:04You were trying to steal the wand too, weren't you?
00:27:07Maybe.
00:27:09God, you slimy, tote-faced motherfucker!
00:27:13Okay, first you tricked me into marrying you, then you ghost me for six months, and now you come in
00:27:18here like a goddamn fucking cartoon burglar and try to take my wand!
00:27:23Look, I was just gonna borrow it!
00:27:25Yeah, for one of your dirty, no-good-spensing schemes?
00:27:29I just... I need it, okay? It's... it's the only way that we can be free.
00:27:35Look, my dad doesn't know about our marriage. Not yet. But he knows about the wand. If he gets a
00:27:41hold of it, he's gonna sell it to the highest bidder.
00:27:43Whoever controls the wand has the power to take over the world. Or... worse.
00:27:47No! Worse than tricking me into marrying you?
00:27:50I told you that that wasn't a trick.
00:27:52It doesn't matter, Eric. She has the wand! That shadow thief or whatever! And that's your fault!
00:27:59I can get it back!
00:28:02Look, I know I don't deserve it. But just... give me one more chance.
00:28:06I can get the wand back, take care of what I need to take care of, and then I'll do
00:28:10the divorce spell.
00:28:11Please, Lily, just... give me one more chance. Please.
00:28:15I can't trust him. I shouldn't.
00:28:19But my gut tells me... this time... it might be different.
00:28:29No.
00:28:31No, we're both gonna go get it.
00:28:34It is my job as a Sherwood heir to set things right.
00:28:37So I don't let the wand fall into the wrong hands.
00:28:41And you really think after Vegas, I would let you go alone to find the most powerful magical object in
00:28:46the entire world?
00:28:48Fair. Uh, whatever you want.
00:28:50Lily.
00:28:52God, I hate when you call me that.
00:28:54All right. I'll call you wife.
00:28:57And you can call me whatever you want.
00:28:59Eric.
00:29:00Husband.
00:29:01Daddy.
00:29:02Shut up!
00:29:03Don't call me wife, either.
00:29:05After we get this wand, we will do the divorce spell. Got it?
00:29:08You're breaking my heart.
00:29:09I mean, you're the better half of my soul.
00:29:13Yeah. You're not gonna sweet-talk your way into my pants again, Eric.
00:29:16We'll see.
00:29:22Now, the wand forbids a direct tracking spell, so we have to track its trail.
00:29:27That's a 10-mile radius. We'll never find the wand inside that circle.
00:29:31Well, with the tracking spell, I get a location, okay?
00:29:34It doesn't last long, though.
00:29:36We'll have like three or four days.
00:29:37Well, lucky for you, I already packed our bags.
00:29:42Consider it our official honeymoon.
00:29:48Aja, this, we're done. You got it?
00:29:50Don't go back on your words, Venson.
00:29:52We will do the divorce spell.
00:29:54Cross my heart.
00:29:56Hope to die.
00:30:14You imagined a car here?
00:30:17This isn't just any car.
00:30:25This is Bessie.
00:30:26You really expect us to track down the most powerful, magical object in the world?
00:30:32In a car without a roof?
00:30:34I mean, if you're not comfortable, I could go by myself.
00:30:42If you trust me not to run away.
00:30:46I wouldn't trust you with a half-eaten newt muffin.
00:30:49I was gonna throw in the trash.
00:30:53Then your chariot awaits.
00:30:55Wife.
00:31:15We've been driving all day and she hasn't said a single word.
00:31:30You're Svensson.
00:31:32You don't play house with sheriffs.
00:31:33Wait, why are we turning?
00:31:35We don't have any time.
00:31:36We have to find the wand, Eric.
00:31:39That circle is getting further and further away.
00:31:42Plus, it's getting dark.
00:31:43We need to stay somewhere for the night.
00:31:44Why don't you just let me drive?
00:31:45Because you haven't slept either.
00:31:47Plus, no one can drive Bessie but me.
00:31:51What is with guys and cars?
00:31:53Jesus.
00:31:53No.
00:31:54I mean literally, no one else can drive Bessie.
00:31:57My great-great-grandfather put a hex on all of our possessions.
00:32:00Anyone that's non-blood related can't touch it.
00:32:03The Svensons like to hoard their treasures.
00:32:06Your family has issues.
00:32:08Finally.
00:32:09Something we can agree on.
00:32:11Was this your plan all along?
00:32:13Make me feel bad for you because your family's evil so I get all ooey gooey and forget about the
00:32:17divorce?
00:32:18Not everyone in my family is evil.
00:32:21Yeah.
00:32:22Okay.
00:32:35You cross this wall or do anything to piss me off more than you already have, then you do not
00:32:40even want to imagine the hex I'm going to put on you.
00:32:48I promise, no funny business.
00:32:52Pinky promise.
00:33:13Good night to you too.
00:33:28In Vegas.
00:33:30You said you had a sister, right?
00:33:34Yeah.
00:33:36Sigrid.
00:33:38She didn't ask to be a Svensson.
00:33:41She's different than us.
00:33:43Better.
00:33:44Not like you?
00:33:46No.
00:33:49Not like me.
00:33:50But you already know that.
00:34:06You know that.
00:34:29It could be a...
00:34:32I'm sorry, yeah.
00:34:32Someone asked you, I had no idea how to take care of yourself.
00:34:32You're right.
00:34:33You are right next to that.
00:34:34You're right next to that.
00:34:35You're right next to that.
00:34:35We're here next to that.
00:34:43Good morning, wife.
00:34:46I told you not to call me.
00:35:04You were saying something?
00:35:07What?
00:35:10How did you know I was awake?
00:35:13The husband always knows.
00:35:21Well, if you don't mind, I'm going to shower.
00:35:27No peeking.
00:35:32Crossed my heart.
00:35:34I hope to die.
00:35:42I need to get a grip.
00:35:44Some washboard abs and a cocky grin aren't enough to make me fall for him.
00:35:49I just need this one time to take the edge off.
00:36:02I remember he touched me like this in Vegas.
00:36:17Look, I'm so close.
00:36:25That's it, Lily.
00:36:27Be a good girl.
00:36:29Be a good girl.
00:36:30And go for me.
00:36:37Are you ready?
00:36:42Eric.
00:36:57You said that you wouldn't look.
00:37:01I don't need to look.
00:37:03I don't need to look to know what you were doing while thinking about me.
00:37:07God, you are so full of yourself.
00:37:09Do I know what I heard?
00:37:11Say another word and I'll turn you into a frog.
00:37:16Are you thinking about that time in Vegas?
00:37:21Where I ate you out in the shower and you came so hard you almost crushed my skull between
00:37:26your thighs.
00:37:29I think about those times a lot.
00:37:32Yeah, well, I don't think about them at all.
00:37:59You still haven't even told me what you want the wand for yet.
00:38:02It's on a need-to-know basis.
00:38:05Oh, don't you think I need to know?
00:38:08I am your wife after all.
00:38:10Oh, now you remember you're my wife.
00:38:13Funny how you only remember that when it's convenient for you.
00:38:15I remember every time I think about how badly I fucked up in Vegas.
00:38:19So all I am is a mistake.
00:38:20If I remember right, you're the one that suggested that we get handfast married.
00:38:24Obviously that was before I knew about all your bullshit and lies.
00:38:29Duty and responsibility might not be a big deal in your family, but in mine, it's huge.
00:38:34See?
00:38:35There you go again.
00:38:36Always worried about what your family wants.
00:38:38It's never about what you want.
00:38:39I follow the rules because I have to, Eric.
00:38:42If I don't, I end up in situations like this.
00:38:45Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's unfair?
00:38:48That maybe your ideas and their ideas are bullshit?
00:38:52You ever think of that?
00:38:54Spoken like a true Spinson.
00:38:56Well, you're a Spinson too, sweetheart.
00:38:58Not much longer, I can tell you that.
00:39:19I want to get some coffee.
00:39:21It's getting dark.
00:39:21You really think you should be alone?
00:39:22So now that we're married, you think you have to babysit me too?
00:39:30Fine.
00:39:31Just don't take too long.
00:39:35You got her in the car or what?
00:39:37Who?
00:39:38Don't play dumb with me, boy.
00:39:40The little Sherwood witch you married forgot to tell me about.
00:39:46You thought I wouldn't find out, huh?
00:39:48You did a good job of hiding it, I'll give you that.
00:39:51Maybe you are my son after all, huh?
00:39:54What's the end game here?
00:39:56You said you just needed to get the Sherwood's wand so you could pay off your debts.
00:39:59What does she have to do with it?
00:40:00Because I'm not an idiot like you.
00:40:03I'll finally have all the leverage I need over the Sherwood family.
00:40:07When I tell them their pretty little heir is my new daughter-in-law.
00:40:11And then it'll be our family that gets to call the shots in the magic world.
00:40:16So you just want to use her?
00:40:18Like you use mom?
00:40:19Like you're using your own daughter.
00:40:21This is not a request, boy.
00:40:23Bring the girl and the wand to me or you will be stripped of your name.
00:40:28Your magic, everything.
00:40:30And your sister, she'll be the one paying the price for your mistakes.
00:40:44This isn't right, the trail should still be here.
00:40:48Would you like some coffee, Miss Sherwood?
00:40:50Yeah, thank you.
00:40:51Wait, how did you know my...
00:40:54You.
00:40:58But the map said that...
00:41:00That's cute.
00:41:02You think that dusty old map could track me?
00:41:09That wand is mine.
00:41:14Not anymore, it's not.
00:41:15And sadly, my employers need your powers too.
00:41:19Employer?
00:41:21Hold still.
00:41:23This will only hurt a bit.
00:41:25No, stop!
00:41:26Stop!
00:41:26No!
00:41:32No!
00:41:33No!
00:41:34Get away from her!
00:41:40Eric, the wand!
00:41:53My magic!
00:41:55She took half of my magic, Eric!
00:41:57You're okay.
00:41:58I got you.
00:42:00You're okay.
00:42:03I don't understand.
00:42:05The map said that the wand was miles away.
00:42:08What did she want with my powers?
00:42:09Thief must have found some way to bypass the tracking spell.
00:42:13She can't have gone far.
00:42:14We'll find her.
00:42:15Lay low for now.
00:42:16Eric, stop the car!
00:42:17I can't breathe!
00:42:19Okay.
00:42:29Hey, hey, hey.
00:42:31Look at me, look at me.
00:42:32You're okay.
00:42:32You're okay.
00:42:33Just breathe.
00:42:34I got you.
00:42:35You're safe.
00:42:37I thought she was gonna kill me, Eric.
00:42:41I'm not gonna let that happen.
00:42:43Not while I'm breathing.
00:42:57I still hate you.
00:43:01If you hated me, you wouldn't let me touch you like this.
00:43:05This doesn't change anything.
00:43:08It's only scratching an itch.
00:43:10Once we get the wand,
00:43:12and we do the divorce spell,
00:43:14now we forget each other existed.
00:43:21Is that what you want, Lily?
00:43:23You wanna forget how good I make you feel?
00:43:26You wanna forget I'm the only person in the whole fucking world
00:43:30Who can make you feel this way?
00:43:36Eric.
00:43:39Wait, wait.
00:43:40Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:43:47We can't do this.
00:43:50This is what goes wrong between us.
00:43:52We can't make that mistake again.
00:43:54We have a job to do, Eric.
00:43:55Eric.
00:43:56Let's get the wand.
00:43:58That's it.
00:43:59And then what?
00:44:01You know what happens after, Eric.
00:44:03We do the divorce spell.
00:44:05And we never see each other again.
00:44:39It smells like fresh baked pastries.
00:44:42Cinnamon.
00:44:44Old magic.
00:44:48I should have known.
00:44:51It's a Seder's Inn.
00:44:53That spell.
00:44:55An almond inhabitous smell.
00:44:57It's woven into places like this for...
00:45:01couples.
00:45:02You mean Orchise?
00:45:05Seder's are the horniest bastards in the known world?
00:45:08It lowers any fear.
00:45:11Doubt.
00:45:12Shame.
00:45:13Grants of your deepest desires.
00:45:16Without any fear of...
00:45:18judgment or...
00:45:28Eric, don't.
00:45:30I'm trying not to.
00:45:41Eric, don't.
00:45:44I'm trying not to.
00:45:51The spell...
00:45:53doesn't create desire.
00:45:55It lets go of the lies.
00:45:57It tells us what we really want.
00:45:59What I want doesn't matter.
00:46:02It matters in here.
00:46:04Tell me what you really want.
00:46:07You can say goodbye.
00:46:09It goes separate ways.
00:46:11Or you can tell me you want this.
00:46:14You want me.
00:46:17Tell me to stay.
00:46:22Stay here.
00:46:24Please.
00:46:25God, what is this?
00:46:27Is this just the magic?
00:46:29No.
00:46:32It's not the spell.
00:46:34It's freedom.
00:46:37Anything in the outside world doesn't matter.
00:46:40Just you.
00:46:41And me.
00:46:44I shouldn't want this.
00:46:46I know.
00:46:49I shouldn't be doing this.
00:46:53Or this.
00:46:54Or this.
00:46:55Be able to share with...
00:46:57To the most respected family of the whole rich world.
00:47:01You definitely shouldn't sound this fucking sexy.
00:47:05To mind.
00:47:07You know the ear.
00:47:09To the Sherwood family.
00:47:12Or you.
00:47:14I want you, Eric.
00:47:16I need you.
00:47:21Tell me who you are.
00:47:23Lily.
00:47:25Close.
00:47:29But not quite.
00:47:32Tonight.
00:47:33Tell me who you are.
00:47:36Your wife.
00:47:37I need you.
00:48:01This doesn't change anything.
00:48:03I know.
00:48:05We can have tonight.
00:48:06And then tomorrow we go back to who we are on the outside.
00:48:10Sure.
00:48:11I'll go back to being my bad self.
00:48:13And you can go back to pretending to be a good little witch.
00:48:17Excuse me.
00:48:18Don't deny.
00:48:19Lily, Sherwood, Svenson.
00:48:21I know I'm kind of dork.
00:48:23Naughty thoughts you have.
00:48:26I don't.
00:48:28It's okay to be bad.
00:48:31You don't have to pretend.
00:48:34I don't, huh?
00:48:37I don't, huh?
00:48:39You know just because I have half my magic doesn't mean I can't play with you for tonight.
00:48:44No way.
00:48:47No way.
00:48:50No way.
00:48:53No way.
00:48:53No way.
00:48:56You're gonna sit there like a good little witch.
00:49:06and i'm gonna do whatever i want to you
00:49:18i don't remember packing that lingerie close your eyes
00:49:25eric you're so good for being such a bad boy
00:49:32i'm being properly motivated not to move
00:49:38see how long it takes you to break
00:49:41for you i could stay here forever
00:49:43pretty to think so why don't we test that little theory
00:49:48we're playing a dangerous game
00:49:51all you have to do is admit that i win
00:49:57i'll let you fuck me i'll even let you come wherever
00:50:03you want you can come here
00:50:10or here
00:50:13i'll even let you come in here
00:50:18god come on i know you wanna just admit
00:50:24i'm right
00:50:28fine you win
00:50:30oh what was fast
00:50:33you hurt me
00:50:34oh
00:50:43so what's my prize
00:50:45i could torture you like you did me
00:50:53but i want to be inside you
00:50:55i want to feel you squeeze me tight
00:50:59then take me to bed husband
00:51:04call me that again
00:51:08you want me to fuck you husband
00:51:10yeah
00:51:11yeah
00:51:12fuck me
00:51:20tell me a story
00:51:24like the ones you did in vegas
00:51:26i've got a story about
00:51:29my pet goat gilmore
00:51:30and how he got stuck on a magic carpet
00:51:34or this story about how my sister tried to negotiate with a troll
00:51:39using only redimates
00:51:40i already know about your family
00:51:47i want to know about you
00:51:50what's it like to be a svensson heir
00:51:52you want the insider info
00:51:56you tell me yours i'll tell you mine
00:51:58you're gonna tell me how wonderful it was growing up as a beloved and blessed sherwood
00:52:07is that what you think being a show what is like
00:52:11is that what you think being a show what is like all fun and rainbows
00:52:16yeah everybody loves your family
00:52:17that's not true eric
00:52:20there are so many people who would love it if we just disappeared
00:52:23my mother has been shouldering all that responsibility and pressure for decades
00:52:27and next year i will be the head witch in charge
00:52:32everyone's counting on me to do the right thing
00:52:33like eat your fruits and veggies
00:52:35like spending my whole childhood being told that the whole world depended on me
00:52:41like never bothering to have any hopes or dreams because my whole life was planned for
00:52:47me from the very start before i was even born
00:52:50i'm always doing the right thing for the family i was never allowed to even think of doing the wrong
00:52:55thing i couldn't be tired i couldn't be scared i couldn't be angry one mistake and my family
00:53:02loses everything that they've ever worked for if this whole world fades to black it's because
00:53:06i messed up it's because i didn't do a good job
00:53:13i don't think i've ever said that out loud before
00:53:16i'm glad you did your turn growing up a svincent was a little different the old man likes to say
00:53:27i
00:53:27was the first of his disappointments i guess it's good at least i was first in something
00:53:36i didn't care about disappointing him i just wanted to get away from him
00:53:41i had it all planned out when i turned 16 i'd leave change my name and this vinson bloodline would
00:53:47die
00:53:47with me my mom died when secret was born
00:53:53my dad used her against me every day since
00:54:03i'm so sorry eric i you shouldn't have asked
00:54:09it's okay
00:54:10it's okay
00:54:10the svencons have always lived in the sherwood shadows
00:54:14we are the shadows
00:54:18all you do is shine
00:54:30you always ask me what i want
00:54:34what do you want eric
00:54:39you'd hate me if i told you
00:54:41i mean more than you already do
00:54:45i don't hate you
00:54:49i never did
00:55:10i don't hate you
00:55:13i never did
00:55:13i don't hate you
00:55:14i don't hate you
00:55:25eric something's wrong
00:55:27dad's got visitors
00:55:29a bunch of old guys i don't know who they are
00:55:31he made me play piano for them like some kind of dress up doll
00:55:35it's really freaking me out
00:55:42eric are you safe
00:55:48eric
00:55:49are you safe
00:55:50for now
00:55:51all those weird old men lived last night
00:55:55and and i hexed my door so no one could get in
00:55:58don't let anyone in
00:55:59if dad tries to get you to play with any of those weird old men just
00:56:02i know
00:56:03i'll just do what he says
00:56:06i always do
00:56:08i'm so sick of this e
00:56:09what if he actually does make me marry one of those guys
00:56:12i'm never gonna let that happen all right
00:56:15look
00:56:16i'm close to getting the wand of life
00:56:19the wand of late
00:56:21like the one from the fairy tales
00:56:23you can't tell dad secret
00:56:26when i get the wand
00:56:28be ready for my call
00:56:30i have a plan
00:56:31i barely know basic spells
00:56:35i don't know if
00:56:36you can
00:56:37i know you can
00:56:39when the time is right you'll be ready
00:57:07filling up bessie meet me downstairs when you're ready
00:57:19oh my god
00:57:21why do you and mom always do that
00:57:24a bit high strung aren't you sis
00:57:27i was just in the middle of thinking
00:57:30yeah and going by your aura i can guess about who
00:57:33very much giving post-orgasmic afterglow
00:57:36oh yeah well you and your little aura reading can go jump in a lake
00:57:40oh aren't we feisty this morning
00:57:42your super hot hubby isn't around i'm guessing
00:57:45or have you already murdered him after catching his dick
00:57:48i know all the best places tied a body by the way
00:57:52i'm fine effie
00:57:54i know all about eric spenson
00:57:55i'm not stupid
00:57:57and when we get the wand back
00:57:59you mean if you get the wand back
00:58:01we will
00:58:03and when we do
00:58:05we'll do the divorce spell
00:58:06this mark will be gone
00:58:08i'll go home and
00:58:10marry the best person who serves our family alliance
00:58:16it's not fair you know
00:58:18i know i'm the last person who should be saying that because it's not like i can change it
00:58:23but it's not
00:58:26it's just the way it goes
00:58:28right there has to be a way for you to be with who you actually want and be a good
00:58:32heir
00:58:35effie what i want has nothing to do with anything in my life
00:58:38that's fine
00:58:40it's what it means to be a sure what
00:58:43just remember repeating it doesn't make it true
00:58:48all right whatever you say sis you know best
00:58:54i know
00:58:55give everyone a hug for me
00:58:57tell them i'll be back home soon
00:59:08last night was the last time
00:59:10after today we're done
00:59:13if i say that enough times
00:59:15maybe i'll finally believe it
00:59:25i'll tell you about my plan with the wand
00:59:30my family's magic is dying
00:59:32my father's been catching in on broken promises for years
00:59:35but he holds most of the power and me and see we just get the scraps
00:59:39that's how he controls us
00:59:42if i could use the wand just once i can take his power away from the bread
00:59:47i'm not trying to ruin your family i'm trying to save mine
00:59:50it's the only way that we can be free
00:59:54that's what you meant by trying to save your family
00:59:58i was going to tell you the night before i was going to tell you the truth
01:00:01and then i was just going to ask if i could use the wand just once and then i would
01:00:06do whatever you
01:00:07want to get a divorce leave you alone forever
01:00:12why didn't you tell me
01:00:16why didn't you tell me that morning maybe things could have been different
01:00:21i would have asked you to stay
01:00:23it's a nice idea but our families have been at war since the beginning of time
01:00:30maybe if we were different people we have different lives this would have worked
01:00:37maybe we can
01:00:40maybe the wand has a spell for that eric
01:00:42a witch can hope
01:00:51what
01:00:53do i have mushrooms growing out of the side of my head why are you looking at me like that
01:01:10wait i'm driving
01:01:31you have got to be kidding me
01:01:39end of the line witches
01:02:04she's out of the side of my head
01:02:07uh
01:02:09uh
01:02:10oh
01:02:10uh
01:02:12uh
01:02:13uh
01:02:14uh
01:02:28Now's not a good time, old man.
01:02:30Well, it sounds like my insurance policy worked.
01:02:34You...
01:02:35You set the shadows, please?
01:02:37Of course I set her.
01:02:39Do you think I would trust you to finish the job?
01:02:52Demons are very expensive, you know?
01:02:57But I thought that the Sherwood girl's soul in exchange for the wand was a good enough bargain.
01:03:05Souls of magic users apparently taste better.
01:03:19You said you needed her alive.
01:03:21The Sherwoods will never pay off your debts if you kill their heir.
01:03:23I've reconsidered.
01:03:25Once I have that wand, I will be the most powerful witch alive.
01:03:30Debts won't matter.
01:03:31The stupid Sherwoods won't matter.
01:03:34And as for the girl, well...
01:03:35I don't need her breathing to use her power.
01:03:38I can always marry Sigrid off to form new alliances.
01:03:43Guess you won't be trapped in a marriage after all, son.
01:03:48You're welcome.
01:03:51Go to hell, old man.
01:04:03Take it!
01:04:08Your soul will be delicious!
01:04:17I can take Dad's magic.
01:04:19End him.
01:04:20Finally be free.
01:04:26Get off my wife!
01:04:35You'll pay for that, witch!
01:04:48This isn't the last you'll see of me.
01:04:55Hey, I've got you.
01:04:57You didn't run.
01:04:59You're kidding?
01:05:00I'd be a pretty shitty husband if I let my wife's soul get sucked out by a demon.
01:05:07Eric!
01:05:08You can't get rid of me that easily.
01:05:10No, no, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:12Eric!
01:05:13Oh, my...
01:05:15Eric, no, no, no, no, no, no, stay with me.
01:05:17Oh, my God.
01:05:20I can't save you.
01:05:21I don't have my powers.
01:05:23I need you to run.
01:05:25You could have saved yourself.
01:05:28I've been saving myself my whole life.
01:05:33I thought I'd try something new.
01:05:36You idiot, you stupid, stupid idiot.
01:05:39Yeah.
01:05:43But I'm your idiot.
01:05:51You took a devil's spell.
01:05:53I had a promise.
01:05:55Now you're free.
01:05:57Yeah.
01:05:59I don't want to be free.
01:06:02I don't want to be free.
01:06:05I want to be with you.
01:06:07Just keep secrets safe.
01:06:10Safe from my father.
01:06:12Safe from all of it.
01:06:15You know, those days in Vegas...
01:06:20were the best three days of my life.
01:06:22All right, let's get this show started, okay?
01:06:27I love you, too.
01:06:32I love you, too.
01:06:33I love you, I love you.
01:06:35Eric.
01:06:38Eric.
01:06:39No!
01:06:42I love you.
01:07:00The Wand of Light has the power
01:07:03to grant its user their deepest desires.
01:07:10Please, please, please.
01:07:21Eric.
01:07:22Please.
01:07:37You absolute moron.
01:07:42You absolute moron.
01:07:44Be gentle.
01:07:46I was dead for like 10 seconds.
01:07:48You're alive.
01:07:51That is for divorcing me
01:07:53on your literal deathbed,
01:07:54you asshole.
01:07:56I thought I was doing something noble.
01:07:58Something cool.
01:07:59The Wand give you your power back?
01:08:02My mom used to say that
01:08:04the Wand's user grants it
01:08:06its deepest desire.
01:08:07I guess it knew what I really wanted.
01:08:11What did you want?
01:08:13You.
01:08:17Don't scare me like that again, okay?
01:08:20You know,
01:08:21I thought I heard something
01:08:24when I was bleeding out.
01:08:29Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:35Maybe you could say it again?
01:08:38I love you, Eric's Vincent.
01:08:43That's my girl.
01:09:03You ready for one last stop?
01:09:07Yeah.
01:09:27Ah, there you are.
01:09:30I knew I could always trust a demon
01:09:32to get the job done.
01:09:34Now, where is my wand?
01:09:37Wait.
01:09:39You're supposed to be dead.
01:09:41Wow.
01:09:42You weren't kidding.
01:09:43He really is evil.
01:09:44I put a barrier
01:09:46around this whole house.
01:09:47It's impossible.
01:09:48There's no way
01:09:49you should be able to be in here.
01:09:50There's always a loophole,
01:09:51old man.
01:09:55Secret.
01:09:56You ungrateful brat.
01:09:58How dare you betray me like this?
01:10:00Really, dad?
01:10:01Playing the family card
01:10:03after you almost sold me
01:10:04into child marriage?
01:10:05You ungrateful little pests.
01:10:14You're powerless now, old man.
01:10:17Magic's gone.
01:10:18Forever.
01:10:31Eric,
01:10:32Otis,
01:10:33Svensson,
01:10:34release me this instant.
01:10:36That is an order.
01:10:39You can handle it from here, right?
01:10:41His powers are gone.
01:10:43This will scare me anymore.
01:10:46You ungrateful little brats.
01:10:47Both of you.
01:10:48You'll pay for this.
01:10:49You will both pay for this.
01:10:55Yeah, yeah.
01:10:56Talk soon, pups.
01:10:57We're gonna hit the road.
01:10:58I said get back here.
01:11:00I said get back here.
01:11:02Get back here.
01:11:03Please don't do this,
01:11:04you little br-
01:11:11Yeah, yeah.
01:11:22So...
01:11:23where to now?
01:11:24Should we go and
01:11:25drop off the wand of life?
01:11:27Yeah.
01:11:29but there's something i want to do first that sounds ominous just so happens that there's
01:11:36another full moon tonight leona sherwood are you asking me to hand fast marry you
01:11:46yeah i think i am eric spenson well we better hurry if we're gonna take the wand of light home
01:11:53and make it back in time to the hunkah hunkah wedding chapel of love
01:11:57i wonder if they have the same elvis i sure hope so but if we're gonna get hand fast married
01:12:02again
01:12:03no more secrets this time so is there anything you want to come clean about now soon to be again
01:12:10husband there is one thing you might want to buckle up we're about to go super speed
01:12:21bestie could have been going super speed this entire time you didn't tell me to make our trip
01:12:25last longer didn't you you know me so well soon to be again wife
01:12:33leona sherwood will you marry me and not because of some spell or because it's your duty
01:12:41but because you want to
01:12:46yes i will
01:12:57ready
01:12:58hell yeah
01:12:59you
01:13:03you
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