- 3 hours ago
The Bear Gary
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00:10To be continued...
00:46you look good yeah i am proud of you i'm proud of you i love you i love you so
00:54much
01:07oh my god let's fucking go yeah do this okay you better be home by 5 15
01:19no problemo babe
01:26yo stop stop you're gonna wake up the whole fucking neighborhood be fucking on time
01:29shit i forgot yeah i'm sorry yeah give me a sec
01:36fucking oh yeah there it is there it is you get in the fucking coming to go in that car
01:43get in the
01:43fucking car get in the car let's go there's just nothing loud yet all right just
01:53why are you slamming that why do you have to just just fucking shut it
01:57just leave it don't say you didn't when you did
01:59mike i did this you guys show me again yeah
02:10how terrible is that fucking filth got it from fucking gogos
02:13it's pretty good what is it hazelot another debit only now
02:17what if you don't have a debit card right then you're fucked if you don't have a debit card you
02:20got the debit card you got to pay a fucking fee it's like they're fucking in the ass either way
02:23yeah because if they do the credit card then they got to pay a percentage of the credit card
02:28i understand but why fuck the customer it's just for no reason
02:34gotta tell you my it's kind of like a little bit of a glass half half empty kind of
02:39energy you're working with for this mission double oh fucking suck my dick what do you mean a mission
02:43yo we're fucking transporting some goods across state lines i'm taking a fucking tape box to gary
02:47indiana gary fucking indiana that's where we're going what's in the box
02:51i don't know what's in the fucking box it's taped i just said it's taped you can tell me
02:58all right fair enough i don't need to know you're a fucking donkey that's what you fucking are that's
03:02what you are fucking all you don't even know what you're fucking taking you're just fucking moving
03:05donkey fucking packing old donkey i am a donkey you ever see what a donkey's packing downstairs
03:18what's happening you're still here is that jimmy
03:23mike
03:26about
03:31you're still there
03:32i don't know
03:32my god
03:32oh
03:32my god
03:32oh
03:54Thank you, Michael.
03:59What are you doing?
04:01Good.
04:02Didn't I say stay in the car?
04:04What?
04:04Man, I said stay in the car.
04:05Why can't you just stay in the fucking car?
04:07You didn't say stay in the car.
04:08You didn't hear me say stay in the car?
04:10Yeah, you didn't say it.
04:11You just fucking watching me?
04:11I didn't hear you say it because you didn't say it.
04:12It's too much, Rich.
04:14Fucking dog.
04:15Huh?
04:16I'm not a fucking dog.
04:17You can't fucking tell me where to go and when to do it.
04:21Yo, look what I made last night.
04:26You made a fucking...
04:28Did you make that?
04:29Yeah, I made this.
04:30Tunes for Gary.
04:32Come on, baby.
04:33Let's do this.
04:35Oh.
04:36Oh.
04:37Oh.
04:37Gradual with the volume.
04:39I am gradual with the volume.
04:41Just turn it off.
04:42This is gradual with the volume.
04:43That's exactly what I did.
04:44I swear to God.
04:45Stop it.
04:46Stop it.
04:46Stop it.
04:46Stop it.
04:47Stop it.
04:47Stop it.
04:47Pull this fucking car over and fucking leave you here.
04:49You understand?
04:50This is not...
04:51This is not gradual this week.
04:53Like that.
04:55That's not what I did.
04:56I know how to...
04:57I respect the fucking car.
05:00Now I want you to respect the fucking music.
05:24Good gracious.
05:30Yeah, there he is. There he is. There he is.
05:34Stop. Don't fucking touch me. Stop. Stop.
05:39Want to hear some fun facts about Gary?
05:41Can't wait.
05:42Guess the population.
05:4570,000.
05:48It is a rust belt city.
05:50It was once known as Magic City.
05:53It was once also known as the city of the century.
05:5754% female.
05:58For those of us in the car that are, you know, not married,
06:01that might be a pretty fun fact.
06:05Obviously, John Cougar, Mellencamp.
06:07Michael Jackson, fucking orangutan.
06:09Michael Jackson's from Gary.
06:10The whole Jackson 5 for that matter.
06:11Could have fucking said Tito before fucking John Cougar, Mellencamp.
06:14All right.
06:15Oh, shit. Coney King does a piece of puff.
06:17What?
06:18Coney King does a piece of puff.
06:19I thought that was just a Chicago thing.
06:23You're trying to tell me you're not at all excited about traveling more?
06:26Traveling?
06:27Yeah.
06:27You're not just tired of the same old, same old.
06:29This is what I'm talking about, Michael.
06:31This is a fucking mission.
06:32Jimmy's entrusting us with some more responsibility.
06:34We've got the fucking open road ahead of us.
06:36You know, there's a lot of, you know, positive things about this day.
06:40Responsibility, huh?
06:41Yeah.
06:42Yeah.
06:42Feeling respected?
06:44Yeah.
06:45Yeah.
06:46I think the time you'll come to find that this is maybe a potentially transformative day.
06:52All right.
06:53We're on a great day.
06:54Bop down to Gary.
06:56Little bada bing, bada boom.
06:58Bop, bap, bap.
06:58Here, we're fucking home by 5.15.
07:01The latest.
07:015.15, why 5.15?
07:03It's just the thing with Tiff that she's got superstition about.
07:06Superstition about what?
07:07Her mom went into labor at 5.15.
07:09She got it in her head that she's going to, you know, the same thing's going to happen to her.
07:12It's the stupidest fucking thing I ever heard in my life.
07:14I can't.
07:14Why would the same thing?
07:15I know.
07:16Literally, how many minutes are in a fucking day?
07:17There's like thousands of fucking minutes in a day.
07:19Why would it happen in this?
07:20Michael, I'm not saying that this makes any kind of sense at all.
07:22We need to be back by 5.15 because her fucking mother spit her out.
07:25It's a non-issue.
07:27It's a non-issue.
07:28It's a non-issue.
07:28It is a fucking issue.
07:29If you're saying we got to be back by 5.15, we'll be back by 5.15.
07:32That's why I'm saying it's a non-issue.
07:37You'd rather be at the fucking serving beefs all day?
07:40Come on.
07:41Fucking open road.
07:45Where's my Kansas City, baby?
07:48And I'm a Kansas City wine.
07:53Well, I might take the train.
07:56I might take the plane.
07:58But if I have to walk, I'm going just the same.
08:02Going to Kansas City.
08:04Kansas City, here I come.
08:09They got some crazy little women there.
08:13Yo.
08:13I'm gonna give me one.
08:15Welcome to Indiana.
08:17You're a fucking world traveler, Rich.
08:19Congratulations.
08:20Let's go.
08:21Well, yeah, you feel different?
08:26Ah, yeah.
08:36City of magic.
08:38City of the century.
08:41You think this happened overnight?
08:43Oh, yeah.
08:43They just flipped a switch.
08:45And everything just went.
08:46Flipped a switch.
08:51Definitely doesn't feel like Chicago.
08:58It's fucking 35 minutes away.
09:02Yo.
09:03I don't know what to say.
09:05She'll change quick.
09:08They got some crazy little women there.
09:12And I'm gonna give me one.
09:17They got some crazy little women there.
09:28had some crazy little men there.
09:43Hey, hi, hon.
09:44Hey.
09:45How you feeling?
09:48Uh, you know, I think I'm good.
09:51What do you mean?
09:52I don't know.
09:53I'm not sure how to describe it.
09:55It's just like...
09:56It's like...
09:57What?
09:57It's like I feel like I have to shit really bad, but I don't know.
10:00I can't tell if this is what the doctor said to look out for.
10:03Okay.
10:06Contraction?
10:07You think it's like Braxton Hicks?
10:09Uh, yeah, probably.
10:11But, you know, I'll be okay.
10:12It's not close to 5.15.
10:14Yeah?
10:14Yeah, don't worry.
10:15I'm okay.
10:16Okay.
10:17Did you do the drop-off?
10:18Uh, almost.
10:19Uh-huh.
10:20Well, I'm proud of you.
10:21I'm really proud of you.
10:22How's the drive?
10:22Are you having fun?
10:23Yeah.
10:24Yeah, we're having a good time.
10:26And how about Mikey?
10:27Is he okay?
10:28Yeah, he's good.
10:29Okay, that's great.
10:30But don't smoke any cigarettes, though, honey.
10:32Promise me, right?
10:32All right.
10:33Okay.
10:33Listen, I'm gonna call you back, okay?
10:35Just try me if you need anything, okay?
10:36I love you.
10:37Okay, I love you so much.
10:39What's up?
10:40What'd he say?
10:41He said he let us know in a few hours.
10:44Well, let us know.
10:47What's it for?
10:48Like, three, four?
10:50Richie, I didn't say it.
10:50He said it.
10:53He had hours to kill him, Gary.
10:55You still feeling respected?
10:57Fuck it.
10:58It's just, I don't know, let's get something to eat.
11:02You see that?
11:03It's Michael Jackson's house.
11:06Huh.
11:06Yeah.
11:08Sheep-o!
11:18Lock the door.
11:20Meet you in there.
11:25What are you doing?
11:25Teddy Pendergrass?
11:26Yes, we are.
11:28Oh, a little TP.
11:29Yes, I love Teddy.
11:30What's the romantic hot dog place you got here?
11:33Oh.
11:35Oh.
11:36I listen to the old school music.
11:38Yeah.
11:38I'm right there with you.
11:39I'm reading something.
11:40Yeah.
11:40And you know what they're saying.
11:41Yeah.
11:44Hi, welcome to Tony King.
11:46Appreciate you.
11:46Yo, Mike, this is Alicia.
11:47How are you, Alicia?
11:48Nice to meet you.
11:49Mike.
11:49How are you?
11:50I'll be your server.
11:51You just let me know if you need anything.
11:53Appreciate it.
11:53I got you a lemonade.
11:57You're welcome.
11:59You're missing out.
12:00You're missing out, huh?
12:01Yeah.
12:02Yeah.
12:03How long you worked here?
12:04I've been working here five years.
12:06Five years.
12:06Yeah.
12:07That's business.
12:08Pretty good.
12:08It's great.
12:09I love it.
12:10You love it.
12:10What do you love about it?
12:11I like working with people for public.
12:14That's the answer right there.
12:15Michael hates people.
12:16Oh, man.
12:18I believe what he says.
12:19I don't like crowds.
12:20I don't hate people, but I just don't like crowds.
12:23You cook at home?
12:25You like the truth?
12:26Yeah.
12:26Only the truth.
12:27No.
12:28Yeah.
12:28When I leave here, I don't want to go stand in front of a stove.
12:31That's it, huh?
12:32Y'all cook at home?
12:34A little bit.
12:35Sometimes I roll some pots and pans, but I don't know.
12:37Not too much.
12:38I don't really cook at the restaurant, though, so.
12:40What kind of restaurant?
12:41Similar to this.
12:42Okay.
12:42Similar to this family spot.
12:44I do some cooking from time to time.
12:46Yeah.
12:46Yeah.
12:46What do you do?
12:47What do I do at the restaurant?
12:49Yeah.
12:50Yeah.
12:50What do you do?
12:51Uh, I guess I'm a bit like, uh, I don't know how you say it, like, like, kind of a
12:54bit
12:54of a song and dance, man.
12:56There you go.
12:56There you go.
12:57I don't know.
12:57Public relations, forward-facing, you know.
13:08Dozen, what do you think of the name Annie?
13:15Throw some names at me you like.
13:20Hit me.
13:22You call me crazy, but I actually like the name Alfea.
13:26Alfea?
13:27Alfea.
13:28Alfea sounds like the name of, like, somebody that's getting their ass kicked off.
13:31Nah.
13:32Alfea?
13:32Alfea.
13:35Alfea.
13:36Alfea.
13:37Sounds like a nerd.
13:38Nah.
13:38Alfea.
13:40Alfea.
13:42Alfea later.
13:46I'll see you around noon.
13:48Alfea.
13:48Alfea when I get back from, uh, from social studies.
13:54Alfea for dinner.
13:58Alfea when I see you.
14:02Alfea.
14:03Alfea.
14:04Alfea.
14:05Alfea.
14:08Alfea.
14:09Alfea.
14:11Alfea.
14:14I met this, uh, this Eva that I liked once.
14:18Eva.
14:34Oh, look at these little fuckers.
14:36Oh, these little fuckers are about to get it.
14:39What's up, girls?
14:40Oh, we're gonna fuck in.
14:42Okay.
14:43Yeah, sure.
14:44All right, you little fuckers.
14:47You ready to get some?
14:48This is my second favorite sport right here.
14:52Hey, we got Knicks.
14:55Hey, what's the score of that game right there?
14:58Well, you guys hooping and you're picking daisies.
15:00Let me and my boy get one of you.
15:02We run threes.
15:03Which one?
15:04All right, come on, Daffodil.
15:05You ready to win?
15:06Yeah?
15:07Come here, young buck.
15:08What's going on?
15:08I'm Mikey.
15:09What's up, buddy?
15:10How are you?
15:11Oh, we getting our balls like that?
15:12Y'all want five points?
15:13What's up, Mikey?
15:14What's up?
15:14All right, let's run.
15:15I don't even need to warm up.
15:17All right, boys.
15:18Come on, Rich.
15:18Let's go.
15:19Oh, shit.
15:20It's time for a little silken suede.
15:23Y'all about to get some?
15:24Y'all want, Rob?
15:24You sure you don't need to stretch?
15:25I don't need to stretch.
15:26I'm about to stretch you, boy.
15:27Hold on.
15:27Let's wait for him.
15:28You ready?
15:29Yeah.
15:29Hey, good luck, youngsters.
15:31Let's go.
15:31Hold on.
15:33Come on.
15:35Come on.
15:35I don't know.
15:37I'm sorry.
15:38Where were you?
15:39All right, play, play, play.
15:40I got things.
15:40Go out there.
15:41Stay in front.
15:42Oh, OK.
15:44Oh.
15:45That's going to hurt.
15:46Damn.
15:47Let's go.
15:47Yeah.
15:47It's man game.
15:49Now.
15:49It's different.
15:50Let's go.
15:50Ha-ha.
15:52You know it's the orange circle, right?
15:55It's the orange circle.
15:56You want to try to get it in that orange circle.
15:59Everyone's afraid of contact out here.
16:00Go to the best.
16:01Go to the best.
16:02That ain't happening.
16:03Don't be afraid.
16:04Come on.
16:04It was.
16:07Good for you, Mike.
16:08Every dog has his day.
16:09All right.
16:10Bring it down there again.
16:11It's because I'm covering three guys, Rich.
16:13Let's go.
16:13Play ball.
16:14Ha-ha-ha.
16:15Hey.
16:16Oh, yeah.
16:17All right.
16:17Yo.
16:19It's every time he's beating you in the back fucking door.
16:22Yo.
16:23Keep the fucking door shut.
16:24Do not let him.
16:25Do not let him get behind you.
16:26It's this.
16:28Motherfucker.
16:28All right.
16:28Let's go.
16:29Now he's playing.
16:30Oh.
16:30Where you going?
16:32Yeah.
16:33That's what I'm talking about.
16:34Hey, you got it.
16:35It's one.
16:35That's one.
16:36Let's go.
16:37Hey.
16:37Come on.
16:37Yep.
16:39Hit one, Daffodil.
16:41That's a good shot, boy.
16:42Bank's fucking open.
16:43All day long.
16:44I see it.
16:45Hey.
16:45Hey.
16:45Hey.
16:46It's a shot that fucking counts, right?
16:48Let's go.
16:48Play defense, hotshot.
16:51Head up.
16:53Let's go.
16:55You all right?
16:56Hey.
16:56You all right?
16:57You all right?
16:59Let's go.
16:59Play ball.
17:00Check up.
17:00Check up.
17:01He's crying.
17:02I tell you what.
17:03They breed him soft out here in Indiana.
17:05Huh?
17:05It ain't the 80s.
17:06It ain't the 80s.
17:08It ain't the 80s.
17:09Let's go.
17:10Yeah, I don't like it.
17:10Did you change your diaper before the game?
17:12Like, do you just play?
17:13What do you got?
17:14A swimmer on?
17:15You play with a swimmer on?
17:17Let's go.
17:18Next basket wins.
17:19No.
17:19Set the ball.
17:20Yes, sir.
17:21Yes, sir.
17:23Yes, baby.
17:24Let's fucking go.
17:25You see that screen?
17:26Yeah.
17:26I'm a fucking lion.
17:27I love it.
17:28I love you, boy.
17:29All day.
17:30Woo!
17:31Hey, good shit.
17:31Good shit, youngsters.
17:32Good shit.
17:33Look at that.
17:33Look at what he's doing.
17:35Hey, young buck, you're not so bad.
17:37You just miss a back...
17:37How do you miss a back door there?
17:39You see the back of his head?
17:40You gotta cut to the back.
17:41And you're not passing the...
17:42And that's what I've been trying to tell you.
17:43These guys are fucking garbage.
17:45The Indiana guys are fucking garbage.
17:47Hey, shut the old bitch ass up.
17:48I...
17:49Ooh.
17:49You're negative.
17:51You're negative.
17:52You know what, actually, I'm about to...
17:53Don't get...
17:53No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
17:56It's all right.
17:56Let him play.
17:57Yeah, let him play.
17:57We love you.
17:58We love you.
17:58Yo, your fucking Nikes look like fucking moccasins.
18:07Fellas, let's be real.
18:09Gary Indiana.
18:18Fuck out.
18:18Hey, you got tall boys?
18:20No tall boys.
18:22Just regular boys.
18:23Like you.
18:24Ah, ah, yeah.
18:25Funny.
18:28What do we got here?
18:30Hey, yo, yo, yo.
18:30Why are you creeping?
18:35Come on, give me some of that O.E.
18:37Don't focus some of that...
18:38Ah!
18:40Drink your beer and get out.
18:41Okay, okay.
18:42Don't drink beer in store.
18:44Yo.
18:45I feel sorry for your mother.
18:46No!
18:47Shut the fuck up.
18:47Come on.
18:48What'd you say about my mama?
18:49Shut the fuck up.
18:50Sorry about my friend.
18:54Two, please.
18:56Let me get a scratch card.
18:57Oh.
18:59Crescent kick is a defensive maneuver.
19:01That's just, you know, clearing space.
19:03Just to fucking...
19:04Snap kick is for speed.
19:07Don't even see that fucker coming.
19:09But then if you need power, then, you know, it's just fucking side kick.
19:12Bah!
19:12All day.
19:13Break a fucker's knee, right?
19:14Bah!
19:16That's it.
19:16I felt that shit.
19:17Want me to tell you what the move is, though?
19:18Yeah.
19:19Look, dude, I don't want to fight you at all.
19:20I'm just going home.
19:21That's it.
19:22Fucking back kick.
19:24Right?
19:25Back kick.
19:26I was getting there.
19:27I was out.
19:28Ding dong, motherfucker.
19:31Oh, be careful there.
19:32Be careful.
19:33Don't get it on the list.
19:33Hey, I'm so sorry about...
19:34Boom!
19:35Fuck out!
19:36And it's like a fucking mule.
19:38Like, think about a mule.
19:39Like, it's these big...
19:40You're actually generating force with, like, the big fucking muscles.
19:43Whoa!
19:44You know what I'm saying?
19:45Yeah.
19:45And it's because you're already going this direction, then you come in that direction.
19:48Yeah.
19:48Yeah, just even, like, the sight of it.
19:50You know what I mean?
19:50Yeah.
19:51Fuck yeah.
19:52Yeah.
19:53Yeah.
19:57Yeah.
19:59Yeah.
20:02Yeah.
20:03Why are we starving?
20:05Christmas cousin.
20:07Huh?
20:08Uh-huh!
20:11Woo-hoo!
20:16Oh, man!
20:30Yeah!
20:30Hey, shit.
20:31Where's your...
20:39yes sir
20:42you're fucking unbelievable
20:44you got fucking magic power
21:02you got to swing and sway when our band starts to play a real cool and way out sound
21:07and if you get the spoon of it
21:10you feel like you gotta move around
21:15need a shot of riddle and blue
21:18with just a little rock and roll on the side
21:20ah ah
21:22spoon bite
21:23spoon bite
21:31come on
21:32come on
21:35yo
21:36and when that rhythm finally hits you
21:38with the beat that you do
21:40you see that sign?
21:42huh?
21:43cousin you see that sign right over there?
21:44yeah
21:48I think
21:51did you see it before?
21:53what are you talking about?
21:54I'm saying there's no way
21:58the two of us are sitting here for over an hour
22:01and neither of us have seen that fucking sign right there
22:06yeah rich it's a fucking sign
22:09I think that bar just appeared
22:11no fuck
22:11yo for real?
22:12shut the fuck up
22:13for real though?
22:14I think that bar just fucking appeared
22:17Michael
22:17okay bar just fucking appeared rich
22:19you don't think that's crazy?
22:21it's a fucking bar
22:23it's a sign
22:26it's a sign
22:27it's a sign
22:27open
22:29that sign's a sign
22:31that sign is the sign
22:33we're going in there
22:36are you fucking retarded?
22:37are you fucking
22:38we've been sitting here an hour
22:39he's gonna call any minute
22:40we're not going in a fucking bar
22:41what's the big deal?
22:42we're going in a little fucking shot of rhythm and blues
22:44we're not going in a fucking bar rich
22:46just sit down and do your fucking job
22:47no
22:47listen to what I'm telling you Michael
22:48that sign is a sign
22:50okay it's a fucking sign
22:51some things are bigger than you and me and fucking Jimmy
22:53we are going in there
22:53we're not going in a fucking bar
22:55just sit the fuck down
22:56I hate when you get like this
22:57get like that
22:58I fucking hate that
22:58don't hit the fuck
22:59what are you doing?
23:00what are you fucking doing?
23:01you're right
23:02you're right
23:02you're right
23:03you're right
23:04we can't do it
23:05alright
23:09what are you doing?
23:10hey Richie get in the fucking car
23:12Rich
23:12sir can you please step out of the vehicle?
23:16sir please I'm not going to ask you again
23:17please step out of the vehicle
23:19license and registration
23:20okay that's it
23:21put your vagina where I can see it
23:23put your vagina right where I can see it
23:26there's fucking houses stop
23:27yo
23:28yo come on
23:29come on we're not going
23:30no
23:30come on let's just go
23:31I'm not doing that fucking bar
23:33no
23:33just a little shot of rhythm and blues
23:34and we come back
23:35you're not doing it
23:36no no
23:36you fucking
23:37you fucking do a shot of fucking cocaine
23:40you think you can fight a fucking tiger?
23:42come on
23:43stop
23:43it's fucking terrible
23:44what's terrible?
23:46I'm like genuinely inspired here
23:47and you're just shitting all over my fucking dreams
23:51it's terrible
23:52I hope you feel good about yourself right now
23:55why are you pressuring me?
23:56come on
23:58alright fuck you
24:00I'm going in
24:01go in
24:01I'm going in
24:04oh shit
24:06yo
24:07I'm good
24:08how do I look?
24:09you look like a fucking barbarian
24:10you look like my father
24:13alright I'm going in
24:14Yo, punk, if you need me to.
24:18Yeah!
24:19All right.
24:21You'll fucking see.
24:23You'll fucking see.
24:26You're going to remember this fucking day.
24:42That's a fucking sign!
25:19You're going to remember this fucking day.
25:20Thinking of a master plan.
25:21This ain't nothing but sweat inside my hand.
25:24So I dig into my pocket all my money spent.
25:26So I dig deep up, still coming up for Lent.
25:29So I start my mission, leave my residence.
25:31Thinking how I could get some dead presents.
25:33I need money.
25:34I used to be a stick-up kid.
25:36So I think of all the devious things I did.
25:38I used to roll up, cause there's a hole up.
25:40Ain't nothing funny, stop smiling.
25:42Still don't nothing move but the money.
25:43But now I've learned to earn cause I'm righteous.
25:46I feel great.
25:47So maybe I might just search for a nine to five.
25:51Hey.
25:51Hey.
25:53You Mike?
25:56Yeah.
25:59Is it true?
26:01What's that?
26:03You're one of the goalies for the Blackhawks?
26:08Uh...
26:09Yeah?
26:10An e-bug?
26:13That's right.
26:16What is that?
26:17What's an e-bug?
26:19It's an emergency backup goalie.
26:23Yeah.
26:24Yeah.
26:24I like never play, but I'm with the squad.
26:27That's cool.
26:28Yeah.
26:29That's cool.
26:33Yeah, your buddy told us about you.
26:36Yeah.
26:37I bet he did.
26:39He also said, um, tell you to put your big boy pants on.
26:45And join us in the bar.
26:48That sounds about right.
26:50Oh, boy.
26:51I'm just a messenger.
26:52I got it.
26:53Okay.
26:53It's pretty fun though.
26:54Okay.
26:55I think you'll like it.
26:55Okay.
26:56Here we go.
27:14Okay, okay, okay, okay.
27:16All right.
27:16So, I, one time, after a night out, I got a ride home, but they took me to the wrong
27:22house,
27:23and I was too embarrassed to tell them that I knocked on the door of the house and convinced
27:29them to let me just come inside for a little bit.
27:32It's bad.
27:33It's bad.
27:34It's bad.
27:34It's bad.
27:35It's bad.
27:36It's bad.
27:38Okay.
27:39All right.
27:39You're up.
27:40You're up.
27:41All right.
27:43Nine years old.
27:44I'm an altar boy.
27:50You guys are fucking good.
27:53All right.
27:53Can I take another crack at this?
27:55All right.
27:56Okay.
27:57Um, my senior year, uh, I was doing pretty well in school, but with the fucking maths,
28:04I'm with my fucking lambune, you know?
28:06So, my camera...
28:06Hey, look who the cat drug is.
28:08Hey, everybody.
28:09You see this?
28:10Fucking great.
28:14Um, so, my grandma, she gave me an ultimatum.
28:17She was like, you gotta get a math tutor.
28:19And so, she told me about this lady, Rock Solano, who sang in her church choir, who, she
28:25was like, uh, a math professor for Cooks County Community.
28:30And I was like, no fucking way, grandma.
28:32I don't wanna fucking do this.
28:33I don't wanna do the math tutor with some fucking 90-year-old, like, you know, fucking
28:37babushka.
28:38Like, yeah, you know what I'm saying?
28:40Like...
28:40So, but she was like, listen, you gotta do it or you gotta move out.
28:43So, come Thursday, 7.30, I'm at this dude's house, eating his fucking mom's golden lasagne,
28:50you know?
28:51Okay.
28:51And I realized, like, I gotta be at, uh, at Rock Solano's, this Tudor's, you know, in,
28:57like, five minutes.
28:58So, I fucking down my cranberry juice, and I fucking sprint over there, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba,
29:02knock on the door, and this fucking woman that opens the door, I swear to God, like, straight
29:08out of Sports Illustrated fucking swimsuit issue.
29:12This is the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen up to this point.
29:16Jet black hair, long, all the way down, just kissing kind of the top of her butt, you know?
29:21And we get in, what?
29:23What?
29:23What?
29:24What?
29:25You guys willing to factor fix me in, or you wanna hear more of the story?
29:29You wanna hear the story?
29:30Yeah, you wanna hear the story, okay.
29:32All right.
29:33So, we get in there, we're talking math, and all of a sudden,
29:37I feel my entire insides just turn to liquid, and I gotta take a shit, like, bad.
29:44But I know that she got one little bathroom right there, this tiny thing, and I know if
29:48I go in there, she's gonna hear everything, you know?
29:51Oh, my God.
29:52And I'm just like, I mean, on the outside, I'm cool as a cucumber, you know, we're talking
29:57math, and on the inside, I'm just like, come on, asshole, don't you fucking family now,
30:01baby.
30:02And somehow, by the grace of God, I make it through this fucking tutor session.
30:09Right?
30:09That's not helpful.
30:10Mmm.
30:12So, Roxanne, a pleasure to meet you.
30:14I'll see you next Thursday.
30:15You know, bah, bah, bah.
30:15I get off, I get outside, and I'm like, yes, I'm gonna fucking make it.
30:19I start to walk, quickly back up, back down, and it just comes out.
30:24That's it.
30:24And it's just like, that's what's happening.
30:28And I'm just, I start to pull my drawers down, my pants down.
30:32I look like one of those, um, photographs of the guys that just discovered oil.
30:36You know?
30:37Like, stuff is gurgling.
30:38I can't tell what's coming up.
30:40And it's just like, some mud, and shit, and everywhere.
30:44And, and it's, I'm like, I have this incredible feeling of relief, right?
30:49Until, I see her little porch light come on, and time slows down, and I see her doorknob
30:55turn, and open, and I look at her, and she looks at me very quickly, and then she quickly
31:01looks away, and, and I just fucking take off through the hedges, and I'm just fucking
31:08running.
31:09I'm just heading right back to Michael's house, and I'm covered with brambles, and my balls
31:13are slapping on either side, and I just got like a trail behind me, and I just can't
31:19stop laughing, and I'm crying with laughter, because I know in six blocks down fucking
31:23Milwaukee, I'm going to be at this dude's house, and I'm going to tell him this story,
31:26and this motherfucker is going to love it.
31:29Factor Fiction.
31:34Sadly, sadly, it is a bad.
31:36Sadly, it is a fucking bad reason.
31:43I'm all right, I'm done.
31:44This is what's on me.
31:46I got to subject you guys to it.
31:48All right, hold on, I'll be right back, I'll be right back.
31:50All right.
32:01You know I know, right?
32:02What's it?
32:04Huh.
32:08You know I know.
32:09but you're not a goalie for now.
32:10Ah, yes.
32:12Yeah, that's total bullshit, yeah.
32:15Mm.
32:19What gave it away?
32:24Something in your eyes.
32:25Yeah, fair.
32:27Fair.
32:30You prefer Mike?
32:32Mikey, Michael?
32:34It's gotta be your call.
32:36Yeah.
32:38No preference.
32:40Preference? Up to the customer.
32:42I don't know.
32:44How about you? What's your name?
32:48Guess.
32:49Guess?
32:51Oh, man, I definitely...
32:53Bridget, I don't know. What?
32:57Oh, boy. Shonda. Shit, shit, shit.
33:01Fuck, I don't know.
33:02Sherry.
33:02Sherry, okay.
33:04Sherry from Gary.
33:05Oh, hey, that's the first time I've ever heard that real quick.
33:08Hey.
33:14You don't want to play the game, huh?
33:16Yeah.
33:18I don't know if that one's for me.
33:19I mean, you...
33:21You want to go?
33:24I don't know if that one's for you.
33:25I don't know if that one's for you.
33:26Yeah.
33:28Fact or fiction?
33:30Michael?
33:31Okay.
33:33Uh...
33:35Ask me a question.
33:37You from here?
33:44I am not from Indiana.
33:48I am from Portland.
33:51Maine, not Oregon.
33:53Okay.
33:56What are you doing here?
33:59Needed to start over.
34:01Needed to start over.
34:01Okay.
34:01I had to get away from someone, something.
34:05Got in my 88 Honda Accord and started driving west.
34:08And my car broke down not too far from here.
34:11My mom's favorite movie was Love in the Afternoon, starring Gary Cooper.
34:17She always said she would have named me Gary if I was a boy.
34:20So I saw the sign and I was like, all right, Ma.
34:24Stayed one night.
34:24It was quiet.
34:28I like a ghost town, you know what I mean?
34:29Mm-hmm.
34:32Kept staying.
34:33Mm-hmm.
34:34Work at this jazz joint, jazz joint down on Broadway called Dirties.
34:39Dirties?
34:39Yeah, I broke the bar.
34:40You like it?
34:41It's great.
34:42Why?
34:44Great.
34:45Come on, what's not to like about a divey jazz and blues joint in Gary and Deanna?
34:54Uh...
34:55Let's see.
34:57That is a fact.
35:01Fiction.
35:02No.
35:02Really?
35:03Yeah.
35:03Fuck.
35:05Fuck.
35:06Fuck.
35:07That Gary Cooper shit, that was suspect as a mom.
35:09Motherfucker.
35:10No, that's real.
35:10No, that's real.
35:11No, it's not.
35:12Fuck.
35:14Tiff, it's me.
35:15It's Richie.
35:16Wait, no.
35:17I can barely hear you.
35:18Tiff, it's me!
35:19Richard!
35:20Where are you?
35:22I'm in fucking Gary.
35:24It's so loud there.
35:25It's going so good.
35:26You sound like you're in a bar.
35:28Are you in a bar?
35:29We're in a bar.
35:30Why are you in a bar?
35:32Why are you in a bar?
35:33Because the clients.
35:34Like a shit bottle.
35:36The clients from Jimmy.
35:38Tiff, it's going so fucking good.
35:40Good.
35:41Mikey's so smooth.
35:42He's so fucking smooth.
35:43It's...
35:44I can't really.
35:44Mikey is so smooth!
35:46Okay.
35:47We're having such a good time.
35:48Okay.
35:49Can you hear me?
35:50Because I'm here.
35:51Please give me to you.
35:53Hello?
35:53How are you feeling?
35:56Can you do it again?
35:57Hm.
35:59Yeah?
35:59All right. I was born and raised right the fuck here, here in Indiana.
36:02I lived here my whole life. I love to travel.
36:05Gone everywhere, but I lived here my whole life.
36:08I love trains. Do not put me on a boat.
36:11Let's see. I got two older sisters.
36:14They got a different dad, who I thought was Santa Claus until I was 11 years old.
36:18I'm not sure thinking about that one.
36:22I had ovarian cancer when I was 22.
36:26My mom is okay. My dad is.
36:31I got a three-legged dog named Lucky.
36:34He's a cool student in town.
36:37And I studied to be an arborist.
36:40An arborist?
36:40Yeah.
36:42You got trees.
36:43I do.
36:44You do? Why? Where are the trees?
36:48They're quiet, sturdy, reliable.
36:50They're always there when you need them.
36:53And they're pretty.
36:58That's a fucking fact.
37:02Maybe.
37:05It's a fact.
37:07Maybe, maybe not.
37:09What makes you say it's a fact?
37:11You just...
37:12I don't know. You're just speaking from your heart.
37:15Right?
37:22What are you looking for, Michael?
37:33Anything?
37:33Anything?
37:44Oh.
37:46There you are, Sarah.
37:56I think you just called me Sarah.
37:58I think you just called me Sarah.
38:17If the train isn't running.
38:18Oh.
38:19Oh.
38:26All right.
38:30Don't do the train.
38:32That's like kind of the whole operation, you know?
38:34Wow.
38:34So you like work for him?
38:36Yeah.
38:37I mean, I'm self-employed, you know?
38:40Yeah.
38:41Yeah.
38:41So you're the boss.
38:44Yeah, I mean, I'm the boss.
38:46There are a lot of people that depend on you, huh?
38:49Well, you know, I depend on a lot of people.
38:53I bet you're a good leader.
39:01People like...
39:04Like people say things about me.
39:07And what do they say?
39:10They say that I don't finish things.
39:16Fact or fiction, Michael?
39:22You mind if I do a poem?
39:25I thought you were going to be you.
39:31That's...
39:32That's the coolest thing I've ever heard.
39:37Do you plan to be there, boy?
39:39Yeah, yeah.
39:40No, I'm going to be back.
39:40We're just down here, one, two, wrapping up some business.
39:43And then I'll be back up there.
39:45Put my catcher's mitt on.
39:46Ready to fucking go.
39:48Yeah, yeah, yeah.
39:50I can't tell you that.
39:51You're like a birthday wish.
39:52No, no, no.
39:53I would tell you, but my wife's got all...
39:55She's all superstitious about a lot of this stuff,
39:57and she was like, she wasn't one of the charity or that stuff.
39:59We're having a girl.
40:00I can tell you we're having a girl.
40:01Oh, yeah, yeah.
40:06You...
40:07I'm good.
40:08No.
40:14And there was this...
40:19When I was a kid, you know, my mom, she used to do this thing where, like, when she was,
40:24like, on, like, the perfect mixture of, like, all kinds of fucking things in her system, you know?
40:28It was just, like, perfect.
40:29She, like, coming to my room in the middle of the night, you know, and she'd, like, scratch my bag,
40:33and she had, like, the longest nails, and she just, you know, and she used to walk me through my
40:38day, you know?
40:40Like, the most fucking minute details, you know?
40:43Like, describing every little fucking bit of fabric of the fucking day, you know?
40:46Like, what we were going to eat when we were going to wake up, what I was going to wear,
40:48what was going to be on the radio, like, every fucking thing, you know?
40:51And just, like, it would make me feel, like, I don't know, like, it would just make me feel so
40:57relaxed.
40:58Yeah, yeah, yeah.
41:00And, like, no matter what was going to happen that day, it didn't matter, like, fucking test or some shit
41:04bag I had to fucking deal with.
41:05Like, I knew that, and she had planned it for me.
41:08It was great.
41:08And I remember there was just one time, I was like, hey, ma, hey, ma, will you come in and
41:14tell me about my day tomorrow?
41:15And she was like, she, like, got angry, you know?
41:18And she was like, she was like, Mikey, what the fucking difference does it make?
41:22It's just a day.
41:27Like, I did, I guess I didn't understand how that could be, like, like, like, like, how that could be
41:33the same person, you know?
41:34Yeah.
41:36That's, that's so scary.
41:38I know.
41:39Yeah, she shouldn't have done that.
41:45I think she tried her best.
41:46I can't, I can't, I can't sit with you.
41:50Yeah, I wish you would.
41:55Come on in, the water's fine.
41:57Oh, boy.
41:59His first impulse was the fucking movie.
42:02You know what I'm saying?
42:03You know what I'm saying?
42:04The one without the narration, that's the one.
42:07Okay.
42:08Okay?
42:09I gotta call my uncle.
42:10Call him.
42:11All right.
42:11Call him.
42:12Let's all, everyone call their uncle.
42:14Jimmy, it's Rich, where the fuck are you?
42:16All right.
42:18Call me back.
42:19All right.
42:20This is just like, you know, this way of seeing the world, you know, like this perspective,
42:26you know, this lens that I've always had, like these things that just bother people and hurt
42:29people and make them frustrated or furious, you know?
42:33Like, to me, it just, I never got it.
42:36Like, it didn't affect me like that.
42:38No, it doesn't fucking matter.
42:39Nothing matters.
42:39Nothing fucking matters.
42:40Nothing fucking matters.
42:42And I get that, right?
42:43Yeah.
42:43Like, it's meaningless.
42:44So why, and when I would go on that trip, like I could catch this groove, you know, sometimes
42:49for like weeks at a time, you know, like sometimes for months, I just like have this
42:54like bliss, you know?
42:55And yeah, I know I'm like, like, I'm like all fucking like babbling and shit, like here
43:00in a fucking bathroom, like a fucking baby.
43:02But I could be, like, I could be a fucking blast.
43:05I can be a blast.
43:06Like I can share it, you know?
43:07And then all of a sudden, like out of nowhere, those same thoughts, like, like, like this
43:11kind of meaninglessness of it all, you know, it like makes me sad.
43:18Yeah.
43:19Nothing matters.
43:20It sets you free.
43:21But then where are you, right?
43:22It's the same thing.
43:23You're nowhere.
43:23It's the same thing.
43:24And then I'm like, like so sad, like I'm fucking drowning, you know?
43:28My jaw feels fucking like a million fucking pounds.
43:30And I, I, it's like, I don't want to.
43:33That sounds exhausting.
43:37You must be really tired.
44:15I'll just cry.
44:19I'll just cry.
44:35I'll just cry.
44:49yeah rich i'm good i'm good i'm coming all right we gotta go yeah sorry i'm sorry to interrupt you
44:55guys because we gotta we gotta go okay we're going we just don't do that i said i'm coming
45:00okay we're fucking going cousin he said he hasn't heard from you all day his guy is okay i heard
45:09you
45:09cousin i'm coming all right fuck man that's
45:31hey i'll come back
45:43so
45:44so
45:44so
45:45so
45:45so
46:46What about my turn?
46:49It's been a pleasure to meet you.
46:50Hang on, hang on.
46:52Hey, we're in America, though, right?
46:53Last time I checked, Gary, Indiana is in the sovereign United States.
46:57Is it not, Vanessa?
46:58Are we not in America?
46:59Everybody get a turn?
47:00Everybody gets a turn?
47:01How great are you fucking people?
47:03How great is this fucking...
47:06This place got fucking heart.
47:08That's what I was trying to tell you.
47:09It's magic.
47:10This place is magic.
47:14All right.
47:16Now we're just a pair of fucking wired and worried travelers, and we fucking love it here.
47:21We thank you.
47:21We thank you, Gary fucking Indiana.
47:23We thank you.
47:25Magic.
47:26Magic.
47:26You know, I just want to take this opportunity, because right now, my fine furry cousin right
47:34there, my fucking best friend, any second now, he's going to be a dad.
47:41And not only that, not only that, not only that, hey, he's happy.
47:47He's happy.
47:49Rich, you're happy.
47:52Right now, I swear, this is the most...
47:57It's like the most healthy, and like, you're full.
48:02You're full, and I love it.
48:04He's in love, you know?
48:07Fucker cannot wait to be a father either.
48:09I mean, he can't fucking...
48:11He can't, he can't fucking wait.
48:13I mean, he, he's got this pride.
48:19You're glowing, Rich.
48:23You're glowing.
48:24I love you.
48:24It's my fucking boy.
48:25I love you.
48:26I love you.
48:27I love you.
48:27I love you so much.
48:30Look at him.
48:31He's going to be a dad.
48:32Look at him.
48:32Look at him.
48:33Look at him.
48:33That's going to be a father.
48:34That, that right there is going to be a father, right?
48:37Fucking kid's going to end up abandoned and alone, just like he was.
48:41But hey, shit.
48:42Hey, at least you went into it with a good fucking mindset.
48:45Right, kid?
48:45Huh?
48:46I mean, no, no, no, no, no.
48:47It's okay.
48:47No, I love it.
48:48That's, that's the thing.
48:49That's the thing you got to know about Rich, man, is that the one thing that you can absolutely
48:54fucking depend on with this fucking guy is that if he is involved, he's going to fuck
48:59it up.
48:59I mean, he is going to fuck it up.
49:01And everybody knows it.
49:01I mean, no, no, nobody says it, right?
49:03Nobody says it.
49:04Because everybody's a fucking coward and a fucking liar.
49:07But this isn't going to be any fucking different.
49:09I mean, he's going to fuck this.
49:10He's going to, his entire life is a fucking bed that he took a shit in the middle of and
49:14he just smears it.
49:15And that's what's beautiful.
49:16Look at him.
49:17It's beautiful.
49:18But he's got to fuck this up too.
49:19Right?
49:20No, no, no, no, no, no.
49:21It's okay.
49:21It's okay.
49:22Everybody knows it.
49:23They don't say it, but they, look, look.
49:25Ooh.
49:27Ooh.
49:28Look at his eyes.
49:28Look at those beanie little fucking eyes.
49:30He knows it too.
49:31That's the fucking thing.
49:32He knows it too.
49:33Well, all right, what?
49:34We got to go.
49:35We got to go.
49:35We got to, where we going?
49:38Where, where we fucking going?
49:39Yo, we got this meme.
49:40Yeah, yeah, yeah.
49:40We got it.
49:41You know what you ought to do?
49:42You ought to get in the fucking truck and just start fucking driving.
49:45Just fucking boom.
49:47Rich, just fucking, you want to do that kid of yours a favor?
49:49Just fucking bolt.
49:50Just fucking hit the fucking road and do not come back.
49:53You want to do him a favor, right?
49:54No, it's fine.
49:55It doesn't matter.
49:56It doesn't matter.
49:57It's the truth.
49:58It's the truth.
49:59What, you going to be a good father?
50:00Is that what you got to be?
50:02Huh, Ronald McDonald?
50:03You going to be a good father?
50:04Are you going to be a good father?
50:06It doesn't matter.
50:07It doesn't matter.
50:08Just say it.
50:08Just say it.
50:09You're going to fuck it up, right?
50:10Come on, you're not mad.
50:11Don't be mad.
50:12You're not mad.
50:13You're not mad.
50:14Are you mad?
50:15Are you mad?
50:16You're not mad.
50:17You're not mad.
50:18No, just say it.
50:19Stop it.
50:20No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
50:22Oh, he's telling the fucking truth, finally.
50:25He's telling the fucking truth.
50:27Say it again.
50:27You hate me?
50:28You hate me, Rich?
50:30You got to fuck this up, Rich.
50:32Just say that and we'll go.
50:33Say it and we'll go.
50:34Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey.
50:35All right.
50:40Stop.
50:41I mean, she's not lying anymore.
50:43Why are you doing this?
50:43I love you.
50:44Why are you doing this?
50:45I love you.
50:48You're a coward, Rich.
50:50You're a fucking coward.
50:52I'm a coward?
50:53You're a coward.
50:54I'm a coward.
50:57You're a coward.
51:08I'm a coward.
51:10Kid's gonna hate you, Rich.
51:14Kid's gonna...
51:17This is it.
51:22No, no, no.
51:24It...
51:24Mm-mm.
51:24Come on.
52:01Come on.
52:35Come on.
52:37Come on.
52:38Come on.
52:48Hey.
52:50One of you, Mikey?
52:56This is for Jimmy.
53:10What's in the box?
53:37What's in the box?
53:43What do, uh...
53:46What do plastic pump impellers do?
53:49They rotate.
53:58Okay.
54:00It's your own.
54:02Probably not.
54:05FedEx strikes are over.
54:23Okay.
54:32Okay.
54:34Okay.
54:41Okay.
54:44Okay.
54:53Okay.
55:00Okay.
55:04Okay.
55:06Okay.
55:06Okay.
55:08Okay.
55:22Okay.
55:35Okay.
55:40Okay.
55:44Okay.
55:50Okay.
55:54Okay.
55:58Okay.
56:00Okay.
56:02Okay.
56:18Okay.
56:21Okay.
56:22Okay.
56:25Okay.
56:31Okay.
56:37Okay.
56:41Okay.
56:43Okay.
56:45Okay.
56:47Okay.
56:49Okay.
56:57Okay.
57:04Okay.
57:12Okay.
57:13Okay.
57:17Okay.
57:18Okay.
57:20No, no, no!
57:50Sharp distance, how can the wind with its arms all around me, lost on the way?
58:06Then after, dream on, on to the heart of the sunrise.
58:20Sharp distance, how can the wind with so many around me, lost in the city?
58:35Sharp distance, how can the wind with so many around me?
58:39Sharp distance, how can the wind?
58:41Sharp distance, how can the wind with so many around me?
58:51Sharp distance, how can the wind with so many around me?
58:54Sharp distance, how can the wind with so many around me?
58:56Sharp distance, how can the wind with so many around me?
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