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مسلسل The Big C مترجم - Episode 1
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00:24You want me to put a pool in this yard?
00:27Yes, please.
00:30Unless you're planning on taking that fence over there and asking the neighbors to go in halfsies with you, it's
00:34not going to fit.
00:35I'm sorry, I know it's small.
00:36And you've got this beautiful shade tree right here.
00:38You're going to want to keep that.
00:39Let me tell you what you should do.
00:41Let me bump out the deck, all right?
00:44And we'll put in a nice sunken hot tub, you know?
00:47And maybe even we'll do a little barbecue pit right here.
00:49I think it'd be real nice.
00:50It'd be an outdoor living room.
00:53Okay.
00:56That's fine, just do that.
00:59How fast can you finish it?
01:00Now, it's the first day of summer, so it's our busy season.
01:02I'll pay extra.
01:03Well, I still have three jobs ahead of me.
01:04I'll pay double.
01:05I will have a crew out here in the morning.
01:08Happy first day of summer.
01:11And to you.
01:29Everybody's cool, Louis the Pooh.
01:30Be cool.
01:32Be cool poohs.
01:33Is that you, lover?
01:35Is that why I'm sleeping on my sister's couch?
01:37I'm going to bump out the deck and put in a hot tub.
01:40I thought we were saving for new closet systems.
01:43Catherine, I don't know who you are anymore.
01:44Why are you here?
01:45I came to get the heating pad you used for your cramps.
01:48Feel that.
01:50That's a big knot.
01:51Yeah.
01:52Could you just rub it for me for one second?
01:54Just one.
02:00Oh, God.
02:00That feels so good.
02:02Oh, get in there.
02:03Oh, honey.
02:05Can we please fix this?
02:07I miss you so much.
02:08And I'm so sorry about what happened.
02:11I'm sorry, Paul.
02:11I have to go.
02:12I'll have an appointment with the dermatologist.
02:14Can we just have dinner or something?
02:15Can we at the very least figure out what we're going to tell Adam tomorrow?
02:19Because right now my story is, Adam, your mom's a meanie.
02:21Okay.
02:22Dinner.
02:27We didn't have a lot of money growing up, but we did have a pool in our backyard.
02:33My brother and I, we would spend all summer in it making up dives.
02:37My signature was the banana split and dive.
02:42Sounds fun.
02:43Except when Sean would hold me under the water and fart on my face.
02:49Well, hello, breast.
02:51How long has that been happening?
02:54Didn't even notice.
02:55Well, screw you.
02:57Anyway, in regards to your question, I don't think I want to do that.
03:02I've just, I've always really loved my hair.
03:04I cry every time I get it cut.
03:06You won't necessarily lose your hair.
03:08My nose is another story.
03:10You told me I was going to lose my nose.
03:15What's that?
03:16Some information on alternative treatments for melanoma.
03:19Oh, crap.
03:20I thought it was a cure.
03:24How's your husband feel?
03:25I haven't told him yet.
03:28Wow.
03:30I'm just kind of a private person.
03:33Except around you.
03:35I can't seem to shut up around you.
03:40Here.
03:41These are some tips on how to talk to loved ones.
03:43A lot of people find it very difficult.
03:44Are you married?
03:45No, but I think I'd want to know.
03:48I was going to tell him.
03:50And then when I got home, there were 15 men in my house playing video games.
03:55Paul was drunk and peeing in the front yard.
03:58I found myself saying, I think I need to be alone for a while.
04:06Some support groups you might be interested in.
04:09I just got this image of when you do get married, you and your bride standing at the altar passing
04:14brochures back and forth.
04:19Tell someone, Kathy.
04:21First day, it's over in Minneapolis.
04:24Don't make it, I last.
04:26Excuse me.
04:27You guys got a minute to help save the planet?
04:29No?
04:30No.
04:30All right, well, when you get that plastic home, put it over your daughter's head and suffocate her with it.
04:34Because you're destroying her future.
04:37Did you go to business school to learn to appeal to people like that?
04:40Uh, no.
04:41I went to Shut the Fuck Up Technical Institute.
04:44I bet you were first in your class.
04:45No, but I slept with her.
04:47Get in the car.
04:49Come back and pick me up on a bike.
04:50I've got something to tell you.
04:51Go tell it on a mountain.
04:52Get in the damn car, Sean!
04:59The least you could do is buy a hybrid.
05:00The least you could do is take a shower.
05:05Excuse me, sir.
05:06I'll pick that for you.
05:07Oh, okay.
05:15Gross.
05:16I know you are.
05:17I would have bought you a meal.
05:19We throw away a ton of food in this country every single day.
05:22And not a figurative ton.
05:23An actual ton.
05:25Besides, I wouldn't want to take food out of the mouths of all those tapeworms you're feeding.
05:29Never comment on a woman's meal.
05:32So, what did you want to tell me?
05:41You're an asshole.
05:45I don't want this.
05:46It's just some money just to tuck away.
05:48I do not want it.
05:50Have we met?
05:51You don't have to spend it.
05:52Just in case you want to get an apartment.
05:54I feel like I'm on a train in Europe.
05:56And you're a little German man.
05:57And I'm me.
05:58And we're sitting across from each other.
05:59And we're talking.
06:01But neither of us really understands the attitude.
06:04I understand that you love shocking people.
06:06And you think living like this is a good idea right now.
06:08But just do me a favor and take it.
06:10Okay.
06:10I'll give it to the Salvation Army.
06:12No, you will not.
06:14I will not give it to the Salvation Army.
06:15Hey, hey.
06:16Hey, guys.
06:16Take it easy.
06:17No.
06:17Hold on.
06:19Oh, relax.
06:20She's my sister.
06:21You want me to have it as long as I do what you want me to do with it?
06:23I want you to spend it on yourself.
06:25I want you to be happy.
06:26No, you want to be happy.
06:27And you think this will do it for you.
06:29This isn't about me.
06:30I'm frigging ecstatic.
06:33Jesus, I wish you knew what that felt like.
06:36What does that mean?
06:37You don't think I'm happy.
06:39I don't want to be a judge because that's your thing.
06:41But eight out of the ten times I saw you last year,
06:44all you could talk about was whether you're going to buy a couch
06:46from Crate and Barrel or Pottery Farm.
06:48Farm.
06:49Like I care.
06:50One was cheaper, but the other one had a nicer fabric.
06:54And ultimately, you decided to stick with the one you already had
06:57because it was a safe neutral with a few good years still left in it.
07:02God, am I glad you worked through that.
07:04That doesn't mean I'm not happy.
07:06Oh, good.
07:07Then you are just really fucking boring.
07:13I wanted a new couch because you spilled fruit punch
07:15while you were bouncing on the cushions.
07:16Not bouncing, river dancing.
07:20I am craving the pasta, but I love their chicken,
07:24so I was thinking maybe you get the pasta,
07:25I get the chicken, and we split.
07:26What, 45-year-old man dances on a couch sober?
07:29Who said I was sober?
07:30Now I have to reverse the cushions, I have to hide the stain.
07:33I used to lie awake at night upset
07:34because even though you couldn't see the stains,
07:36I knew they were there.
07:36Well, that's why I told you to go ahead and pick out a new couch.
07:38I don't want to be the one to pick out the new couch.
07:42I want to be the one to spill the fruit punch.
07:44But you're not the spilling the fruit punch type.
07:52Do you think I'm boring?
07:54Just please tell me what I have to do to get back in the house.
07:56You do.
07:56You think I'm boring.
07:58I do not.
07:59Look, it's just the way that our personalities break down.
08:01I like to do certain things that some people might categorize as fun,
08:04and you like to do other things
08:06that people might consider less than an optimal good time.
08:09Like what?
08:10Well, like organize stuff and clean stuff
08:13and put things in containers.
08:14I wanted to be the fun one.
08:15I wanted the house with the pool
08:17so I could teach Adam the banana split and dive,
08:19but you wanted to be closer to your job
08:20so you could vest better work.
08:21And you said it was a better idea
08:23because so many people die in pools.
08:25People die everywhere.
08:27I said it was a better idea
08:28because you threw a tantrum in front of the realtor.
08:30I made my point in an emotional way.
08:31You made your point in a childish way.
08:33Well, maybe I wouldn't act like such a kid
08:34if you didn't ask me if I needed to pee
08:36every time I leave the house.
08:37Maybe I wouldn't treat you like such a child
08:38if every time I made you a sandwich
08:39you didn't ask me to cut the crust off the bread.
08:41Oh, sue me.
08:41I love a crustless sandwich.
08:42Well, I love onions.
08:44I haven't had an onion in 15 years
08:46because you say they're stinky poo-poo.
08:48They are.
08:51Come on, Kathy.
08:52Are you honestly telling me
08:53that I'm sleeping on my sister's couch
08:55because you want to start cooking with onions again?
08:58Yes, Paul.
09:00That's it.
09:01I want onions to be a major part of my life
09:03in the next year.
09:05Are you ready to order?
09:08I'm just having desserts and liquor.
09:10That's really good.
09:19Your money or your life?
09:20Get on the ground!
09:21Go, please, don't hurt me!
09:22Don't hurt me, I have a child!
09:26Hey, Mom.
09:27Did you miss me?
09:29That's not funny!
09:30It was kind of funny from this side.
09:33Why are you home?
09:35Brent's parents just drove really fast.
09:37Some vacation they fought the entire time.
09:41Where's Dad?
09:45He's staying at Aunt Lisa's.
09:48Why?
09:51Sometimes.
09:52Adults just need a little breathing space.
09:54Oh, Jesus, what did you do?
09:56What does that mean?
09:57Don't say Jesus!
09:58Jesus.
09:59Are you going to get a divorce?
10:03Honey, everything's going to be fine.
10:05We're building a deck onto the house with a hot tub.
10:07So you and your friend...
10:08I don't like hot tubs!
10:10You don't?
10:10No!
10:11You said they're like sitting in a giant Petri dish.
10:14Everybody's germs crawling up in your butthole.
10:17I'm pretty sure I didn't say butthole.
10:20You're tired.
10:21Go to bed.
10:23Jesus.
10:37No, Brian, you're not understanding.
10:39I want a pool.
10:41Not a hot tub, a pool.
10:43Okay, Brian, let me call you back.
10:44Dig a hole as deep and as wide as you possibly can.
10:48Cut down the shade tree.
10:49Dig right up to the house so that I can dive into the pool from my porch.
10:53Now, I'll pay you over time, but if you don't want the job, I'll get somebody else.
10:56There's no skin off my nose.
10:57I have no loyalty to you.
10:58We just met.
11:00Hey, lady, if that's what you want, I will get a digger out here this afternoon.
11:05Great.
11:08Get your digger out here.
11:10The bigger your digger, the better.
11:16Bring it back.
11:17I'm sorry.
11:19I'm Kathy.
11:20It's weird.
11:21I've lived across the street from you for five years.
11:23I never got your name.
11:24I apologize for that.
11:26You know, there's a dog park pretty close to here.
11:29My son could...
11:31Well, guess who's not going to swim in my pool?
11:45Are you going to teach us anything today?
11:51Have I ever taught you anything?
11:53Really?
11:55This is summer school, so I guess the answer is obvious.
12:02Has anybody ever seen The Patriot?
12:05Its depiction of the American Revolution is about 20% accurate at best.
12:10But if you understood this version of the truth, you'd still know more about that time in history than 99
12:15% of Americans.
12:16And Mel Gibson is medium good.
12:18Enjoy.
12:25You're late again, Andrea.
12:28Yeah, but I figured since you usually spend the first two minutes of every class trying to get to your
12:31point,
12:32I'd have missed a whole lot.
12:34Class, chapter one.
12:35Oh, sorry, chapter two.
12:36Sorry, sorry, sorry.
12:39Plenty.
12:40Come get your test.
12:48You can't be fat and mean, Andrea.
12:51What?
12:51You heard me.
12:52If you're going to dish it out, you've got to be able to look it up.
12:55Fat people are jolly for a reason.
12:57Fat repels people, but joy attracts them.
13:00Now, I know everyone's laughing at your cruel jokes, but nobody's inviting you to the prom.
13:03So you can either be fat and jolly or a skinny bitch.
13:06It's up to you.
13:09Sit down.
13:12We're watching a movie.
13:27Start my face off.
13:29Help me cut.
13:31I am making chili your favorite.
13:33Not with onions in it.
13:35You've never even tried them.
13:36We had sushi on vacation.
13:37Okay, awesome.
13:39I am a warrior.
13:41This is my weapon.
13:42I will teach you many things.
13:43Hey!
13:44Careful with that.
13:50Jeez!
13:51I cut my finger off!
13:52Oh, Mom!
13:53Oh!
13:54Oh, God.
13:55Hold this.
13:56Very tight.
13:56It's okay.
13:57Very tight.
13:57Get into the car.
13:58We'll go to the hospital.
13:59We'll go.
13:59Okay.
14:07Mom!
14:14That wasn't funny!
14:15Let's take a vote.
14:17Discuss your punishment with your dad!
14:19Let me know how that goes.
14:22Did you not flush the toilet?
14:24I won't flush.
14:25What?
14:25Did you try and plunge it?
14:26You plunge it.
14:27I'm gonna go away to Brent's.
14:35What's the problem?
14:36Is this your house?
14:37No, I live in the next town over.
14:38I just like to walk around in my robe.
14:40Oh.
14:41Tighten your belt,
14:42because your boob's hanging out.
14:45You don't have permits for this job.
14:48So?
14:49I'm not bothering anyone.
14:51One of your neighbors complained.
14:53Which one?
15:03God, I'm so sorry.
15:04You can't just walk into my house.
15:06You have no idea what I can do.
15:07You're a pain in the ass.
15:08You're a fucking cunt.
15:10Get out!
15:11You have never said hello to me.
15:13You have never smiled even a little bit.
15:16And you sit out there and you scowl at everybody that walks by your rundown house
15:20that looks like shit and smells like chicken that you fried 23 years ago.
15:25Then I do one small construction project and you have to go behind my back.
15:29And I really, I wanted to teach my son the banana split and dive.
15:34Because I don't have a lot of time.
15:38Summers in Minneapolis, they are very short.
15:40They're here and then it's over.
15:42It's just over.
15:43I cannot tell you how mad that makes me.
15:45Oh, man.
15:46I'm so sorry.
15:47My husband built this house.
15:50And he loved puttering around in the yard.
15:53I accused him of loving that lawn more than me once.
15:57Hmm.
15:57Let me guess.
15:58He died.
15:59And all my friends are dead?
16:01So I just sit out there and wait until I can see them again.
16:07Sorry I'm not in a better mood.
16:09Well, if you think you're going to be waiting at least one more day,
16:12do your neighbors a favor and mow your fucking grass.
16:31Oh, my God.
16:46Please kiss my big onion mouth.
16:48No.
16:49Because they're stinky, aren't they?
16:53They're stinky.
16:59From now on, it's all about you.
17:02However long it takes forever.
17:05You.
17:08Make our day.
17:09Leave a message.
17:11Hi, Kathy.
17:12It's Dr. Mauer.
17:13Todd.
17:14Um, I'm just calling to check in.
17:16See how you are.
17:18I've been thinking about you.
17:20A lot.
17:22Anyway.
17:23Call me.
17:25Who's that?
17:34I've been meaning to talk to you about something.
17:42Are you fucking kidding me?
17:44So this is why you need your space?
17:47This is what you mean by fun?
17:49A little doctor fun on the side?
17:51Well, you are not boring anymore, Catherine.
17:55I'll give you that.
17:57Jesus.
17:59How did you do this to me?
18:01How did you do this to me?
18:11Well, eventually you're going to have to tell him.
18:13Maybe you can tell him for me.
18:14After all, you have more practice giving out this kind of news.
18:18Does it get easier?
18:20Do you like it?
18:21Does it give you a bit of a God complex?
18:25I'm your first.
18:27Really?
18:28Well, I mean, I've been in on other diagnoses with other doctors, you know, in my training.
18:32How old are you?
18:3331.
18:34Oh, holy shit.
18:36Shows you how good my insurance is.
18:37I get the new guy.
18:40So as you're first, how was I?
18:42Well, the first thing you said was, it's okay.
18:46I don't think you were more worried about me.
18:48Bad habit of mine.
18:50Takes 28 days to break a habit, right?
18:53I have that.
18:56So how was I?
19:01Very professional and matter-of-fact but detailed.
19:04You dumbed it down enough to be clear but not insulting.
19:07And underneath it all, you seemed sad, and I appreciated that.
19:10But after you left the room, I heard you joking with the nurse about putting the donuts too close to
19:15the urine sample,
19:16and is that what you were supposed to wash it down with?
19:18You heard that.
19:20Made me doubt your sincerity.
19:22Thin walls.
19:23I remember that.
19:25You'll remember more than that.
19:26You think?
19:27Of course.
19:28She always remembered your first.
19:31Phone rings.
20:00Are you smoking?
20:02Did you just do a cartwheel?
20:04I want you to think of every one of these you smoke
20:06is taking six months off of your life.
20:08You know what?
20:09I'd rather be skinny and die young than be fat forever.
20:12What can I say?
20:13Fat camp didn't work for me.
20:15Yeah, well, there's got to be other options.
20:17The blood sugar diet, the protein diet,
20:20the starvation diet,
20:22the pretending I just don't care strategy.
20:24You know what?
20:25You would be mean, too.
20:27You just need motivation.
20:28Oh.
20:29I'm healed.
20:30Thanks, Mrs. Jameson.
20:31I should have come to you sooner.
20:33I'll pay you a hundred bucks for every pound you lose.
20:36Here is a good face.
20:39Twenty-three dollars.
20:41We meet in the gym every Friday at two for weigh-ins.
20:43If you smell like a cigarette, the deal is off.
20:47The skinny bitch will see you on Friday, then.
21:11My name's Marlene.
21:13My dog's name is Thomas.
21:14He doesn't like walking because he's got a thing on his toe,
21:17but thanks for the offer.
21:24Nice to meet you, Marlene.
21:26Can I borrow your lawnmower?
21:28Mine's dead.
21:30Add it to the list.
21:32Sure.
21:33I'll have my son bring it over.
21:37Marlene.
21:42If you were ready to go, did you ever think about just going?
21:46I think about it all the time.
21:49But I just keep waking up.
21:56You call me any time, day or night.
21:59It doesn't matter.
22:00You understand?
22:00Call me when we're together.
22:02Call me right now.
22:04Call me right now.
22:06It's a phone, too.
22:08Yeah, no.
22:11Love you, buddy.
22:28Mom!
22:44Mom!
23:03Why aren't you laughing?
23:04No!
23:05No way!
23:06No way!
23:06You suck!
23:08Someday, I am going to be dead,
23:10and as a courtesy to the world,
23:11I don't want to leave them the guy
23:12who doesn't know how to get his shit to flush.
23:13And let me be clear!
23:15Your dad isn't living here
23:16because I only wanted to raise one kid,
23:18and I chose you.
23:18And from now on,
23:19I'm going to raise you so hard,
23:21your head's going to spin.
23:22Come on.
23:25Get off me!
23:26What are you doing?
23:27Sorry it's not sushi.
23:31The instructions are in the name.
23:33Plunge her.
23:35Where'd you get that?
23:36Dad gave it to me.
23:37I don't think so.
23:38Mom!
23:38Give me my phone back!
23:41Mom!
23:43Mom, come on!
23:45Open the door!
23:46This isn't cool!
23:47Help me!
23:49Come on!
23:51Come on!
23:51This isn't cool!
23:52Somebody help me!
23:53Turn the music down!
23:54I'll take you down!
23:56What the hell?
23:57Help me out!
23:58Seriously, it smells like a kid here!
23:59I'll take you down!
24:01Mom!
24:02Help me out!
24:04I'll take you down!
24:05Seriously, let me out!
24:08I'll take you down!
24:10Seriously!
24:11Oh!
24:12Rest it!
24:13I'll take you down!
24:14Oh, let me take you down!
24:18I'll take you down!
24:19Oh, let me take you down!
24:23I'll take you down!
24:30I brought you some chili.
24:33I want for nothing.
24:35It's leftovers.
24:37I was going to throw it away.
24:48Take a picture.
24:49It lasts longer.
24:55You're wearing a robe?
24:56I never noticed what a handsome guy you are.
25:00No wonder my friend Holly had such a crush on you in high school.
25:02She'd come over to hang out.
25:04I'd catch her in your room, staring at your clothes.
25:07I never knew that.
25:08It grossed me out to think of you two together, so I told her you were gay.
25:12Well, I guess she thinks she lost her virginity to a gay guy then.
25:17No way.
25:19Way.
25:24I'm going to burn my couch in the backyard on Friday if you want to come over for a bonfire.
25:29You're starting to get your weird back, sis.
25:32You have no idea.
25:46And I could do chemo, but I'd just be buying a little more time.
25:50And it would mean a lot of people taking care of me, and it's just not my thing.
26:01You know what makes me feel better, though, if I'm being honest?
26:07It makes me feel better to think that we're all dying.
26:17All of us.
26:20And when you have a kid, you expect that you'll die before they do.
26:23I mean, even though you try not to think about it, at least you hope to God you do.
26:35So if I think about it that way...
26:39Hey.
26:42I'm living the dream!
26:48I'm here all year!
26:52Performing at stage four!
26:58Oh, come on!
27:00Come on!
27:01Come on!
27:01You gotta give it up for me a little bit!
27:03It's kind of funny!
27:06Death comedy!
27:11I'm warning you that this laughter might turn into a sob in a second.
27:19Yep.
27:21There it goes.
27:28As long as I'm being raw and vulnerable here, I might as well tell you I'm feeling very much
27:35in love with you right now.
27:39It could just be gratitude.
27:43You want to see my boobs?
27:45No one else seems to give a shit.
27:53This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine.
28:01This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, yeah.
28:10This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, I'm gonna let it shine to show my lover.
28:25I'm gonna tell you that everywhere I go, I'm gonna let it shine, yeah.
28:36Everywhere I go, I'm gonna let it shine, yeah.
28:45Everywhere I go, I'm gonna let it shine, yeah.
28:54There you go, I'm gonna let it shine.
28:57.
28:57Really?
29:00.
29:02.
29:02.
29:02You
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