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American Dad - Season 22 - Episode 02: The Flume Flume Room
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00:05going to couples therapy can be uncomfortable and talking first is scary but this is a safe space
00:13who would like to begin there is something that's been bothering me dr fey go ahead
00:21larry bird and big bird both birds both big both yellow is that why they're called that
00:29is it a joke does this relate to your marriage does it have to i'll go for starters i wanted
00:36to
00:36come to regular couples therapy not cia couples therapy this is the only place i can talk openly
00:44about what i do for work plus it's free it's free right his work is the problem he's always on
00:50a
00:50mission or planning a mission he never has time for me that's a negative no it's true oh look i
00:59sympathize but we've got a big mission on the horizon uh you're not being unreasonable about
01:03the big mission are you francine it's not leaving any time for us how's the sex we're having a ton
01:11of sex okay sex you hear that boys yeah is stan helping with the children yeah i don't do much
01:20for him either are you at least watching prestige television together yeah some thought-provoking
01:26stuff slow horses then what more do you need from this valuable busy agent there's something that i
01:33want us to do but stan is dismissive i'm not dismissive unless it's that one thing it's weird
01:39it's weird frenzy what is it flumes flumes like log flumes the rides what the hell these things
01:51yeah i like to read about them research them ride them of course i like the gentle knocking around
01:58of the log as it flows down the channel we call that trucking who calls that trucking fellow flume
02:05enthusiasts or flumies we like to gather in cyberspace on a web board called the flume flume room stan is
02:13right it's weird yes still though i'm not a doctor and can't prescribe medication i am going to prescribe
02:21that you stan take one flume ride with francine as an active placation yes placate me you're not a doctor
02:29no but it's fine i'm married to one that's how i got the job my love my king
02:41all my doctors are kissing
02:46next up on prank my dracula males here the male song
02:53no no no not today jeffrey cause we've got a wrong address i'll have to mark it as a wrong
03:02address yes
03:04i'll address the mailman and press upon the mailman that the address on this mailman is a wrong address
03:18actually and i hate to interrupt wrong address you have no idea but i think the name on this is
03:23one of my personas van donnegan deets
03:25yup so what's his story what's his deal i have no idea i remember the name but nothing else about
03:30him
03:31it's from the bank of langley dear mr deets you have not visited your safety deposit box in years
03:37in accordance with yada yada yada you have one week to claim the contents
03:41ooh a safety deposit box there could be something of incredible value inside
03:45like jewels or one of those secret recipes like the recipe for coke
03:50or the recipe for mrs fields chocolate chip cookies
03:53mrs fields mrs fields is a very beautiful woman
03:57what if it's mrs fields old
04:00panties
04:01oh my
04:02we've got to get in that safety deposit box
04:04cause if i know van donnegan deets and i don't it's definitely those panties
04:11i'm so excited we're doing this it isn't the greatest flume class c standard kit
04:17but it does have a reverse turntable load in
04:20there's only 26 of those left in the world
04:23actually 25 they just shut down amenhotep's curse at lanston park
04:28hey he's a creep like you
04:29stan
04:29a creep about flumes
04:32okay baby i'm gonna talk you through this we're getting on to what we flumies call
04:37a wet belt
04:39right now we ease into the juice this is called the let go
04:48oh la la
04:49well if you like that get ready for a bunch of old lanterns
04:54bonjour monsieur jackal
04:56this is the front desk calling to tell you we are sending up a complimentary bottle of
05:01uh french wine
05:03you're working
05:04my bellboy jean renee is at the door
05:07he is a harmless boy let him in
05:10got him stan
05:11and the big mission draws one step closer
05:14at least you didn't miss the drop
05:16gotta put away the old tactical laptop
05:19phones in there
05:20don't need to make it neat
05:21we're done
05:22thank god i called an uber as soon as we got here and it's been waiting in the parking
05:26lot just surging like crazy
05:28whoops i get you there
05:32is this langley bank
05:34it is
05:35oh
05:36it's me van donagan deets
05:38a customer
05:39i'm coming in to access my safety deposit box
05:42wanted to know what i need to bring
05:44besides myself of course
05:48an id
05:49oh i can whip up one of those no problem
05:50what else
05:51a key
05:52and if i can't find the key
05:54you have security questions
05:56oh okay this will be easy because i'm me
05:58birthplace
05:58don't know
05:59mother's maiden name
06:00uh next
06:01favorite pizza
06:02arizona style
06:03okay
06:04okay
06:04what did they say
06:06they said we need the key basically
06:08you're back
06:09how was
06:10what was that dumb thing you were gonna do
06:12the flume
06:13oh yeah
06:14the cookie flume
06:16i went on it
06:17and you worked the whole time
06:18i'm sorry
06:19were there hidden provisos in the agreement
06:21you said you wanted me to ride a flume
06:22and i did
06:23in my fashion
06:24just forget it
06:26it's fine
06:27it's fine
06:28she says it's fine
06:29fine means good
06:30this marriage is cured
06:34well now that we're wrapped up i gotta do recon for the big mish
06:37be back in two or three or ten days
06:39was that the sex bell
06:50huh
06:52francine's suitcase is gone
06:53and all of her pink dresses
06:55leaving only her rarely seen yellow dresses
06:58big stan
06:58i've been practicing and i can almost do a backflip
07:01watch
07:01not now special k
07:02have you seen francine
07:03she's not with you
07:05she's been gone the whole time
07:07the whole time
07:08uh didn't you say you dudes were in couples therapy
07:11yeah why
07:12bro everyone who goes to couples therapy gets divorced
07:16she said everything was fine
07:17oh stan
07:18fine means bad
07:20read the writing on the wall bro
07:22francine left you
07:24francine
07:25left me
07:26a backflip will cheer you up
07:30oh god
07:31oh no
07:37man we've been looking for the safety deposit key for days
07:40at first it was fun
07:42cause i found that nummy old nilla wafer
07:44but as time passes
07:46i'm finding fewer and fewer nilla wafers
07:48kids do you know where your mother went
07:50did she say
07:51francine let's stand
07:52she finally had enough of his no good antics
07:54no we don't know that
07:55mom left
07:56it was a long time coming
07:58maybe she's in the basement
07:59she's been down there a lot doing laundry
08:01probably getting her wardrobe ready for her new life
08:03i am setting you down
08:05mom hasn't done laundry this week
08:07i smell like ass
08:09yes
08:10you all do
08:11then what was she doing in the basement
08:14big stan and special k back on the case
08:17the old family computer
08:18is this what you've been doing down here francine
08:23check her search history
08:25the only site she visits is the flume flume room
08:29what am i even looking at
08:31i'll say royal blue text against sky blue
08:33that's no pop
08:34no
08:35list your top 10 flumes
08:38best pocket ponchos
08:40list your top 11 flumes
08:42welcome pink flamingo
08:44her username
08:45look pink flamingo commented
08:47best flumes to ride solo
08:49i'm usually lf status without fhh
08:53what do those letters mean
08:55forum abbreviations
08:56lf means lonely flumer fhh
09:00flume hating husband
09:01you pulled those up fast
09:03this presario still cracks
09:05you've got five minutes to live
09:08do you solo nightmare niagara
09:11or dudley do writes rips off false
09:13she has 40 000 posts like this
09:16who's this guy who keeps replying to all of her comments
09:18log thario
09:20if i was there you wouldn't be solo
09:23we'd be ff
09:24uh-oh
09:25you know what that means
09:28ff means flume friends
09:30double uh-oh
09:32you know what that means
09:34hey pink flamingo
09:36check your dms
09:37hey stan
09:38i'm on the internet too
09:40i'm looking for information on van donaghan deets
09:43it's all just conversations with log thario
09:47a lot
09:48oh cybering
09:49it's an affair
09:50no it's just flume talk
09:52but every day
09:54multiple times a day
09:55oh it's an emotional affair
09:58they keep talking about some guy named
10:00e-carmac dufrane
10:03i address you today
10:05not as e-carmac dufrane
10:07scion of dufrane petrochemical corporation
10:10but as a humble important man seeking to make amends
10:14dpc made the world's cookware nonstick
10:17but while everyone marveled at fried eggs sliding nicely onto plates
10:22our chemicals made the rivers burn
10:24the oceans turn sour
10:27and the rain fall as acid
10:29with all this wealth
10:31how then can i set things right
10:33give it away to environmental groups
10:35i'm building a big flume
10:37i'm calling the ride
10:38roanoke which is a cute reference to that virginia colony that disappeared
10:43so it's in virginia then
10:45no
10:45its location is a secret
10:47okay
10:47but i'll give you one
10:49teensy little clue
10:51mon
10:53it's a reggae themed flume
10:55get me two tickets to jamaica
10:56but roanoke wasn't found in jamaica or anywhere else
11:00dufrane disappeared shortly after this press conference
11:03leaving the world with more questions than answers
11:06that's it for rad martigan's totally unboring history
11:09like and subscribe and check out my only fans for the same content but i'm in a hot tub
11:14dufrane's some 70s nut job
11:16six days ago logthario writes
11:18p.f. i found the location of roanoke
11:21i don't trust the mods
11:23can i get your numbers so we can text
11:25he's making a play for the digits
11:27tell me she didn't give them
11:28she
11:29did
11:30that was the last message
11:32that together
11:33you've got to stop this emotional affair before it turns physical
11:37then it looks like to save my marriage i've got to find the lost flume of roanoke
11:42internet says who van donagan deets is
11:44he's a retired songwriter and he lives at of course a rest home for old songwriters
11:49so that's where
11:49ow my eye
11:52gentlemen this is it the big mission
11:55at 1700 hours our stealth chopper enters north korean airspace
12:01mon mon turner let me use the satellite a little bit
12:06you've gone so far from where i was looking
12:12pink flamingo
12:13sir i need the black hawk
12:15now during mission launch
12:17i also have to have the night vision goggles
12:19the guns the cool backpacks and let's say 15k in slush cash
12:22may i ask what the reason is
12:25it's private
12:26i respect the hell out of privacy
12:29take everything
12:31what about the big mission sir
12:34who cares
12:35money penny
12:36get me my reading glasses
12:38a cozy blanket
12:39and agent smith's confidential couples counseling file
12:46we wrote the songs that made the whole world sing
12:52we wrote the songs and now it's time to die
12:58we're here to see van donagan deets
13:00mr deets was in our baccarat wing but he hasn't been here in years
13:04did he leave any of his personal effects that i could rifle through
13:08oh great i hate to wait
13:13that's him
13:14do you remember him now roger
13:15nothing but look at this
13:17the safety deposit box key
13:19jeff's so excited
13:28cortana fly home
13:29i didn't quite catch that
13:39aha i caught you
13:41stan how did you know
13:42where is log fario
13:43where's that little splash mountain sex maniac
13:46uh i think he's on the ride
13:48i'm trying to find him
13:50and cheat with him
13:51uh i know you want to talk and i sympathize
13:55but i've got a big mission
14:06oh that's stan
14:08he gets me so mad
14:10here you leave a wicked world behind
14:13to drift into a song of water
14:15and divine recreation
14:17this is roanoke
14:24i'm really here
14:26me francine
14:28just a simple very beautiful girl
14:31on roanoke
14:32let us turn back the hands of time
14:39bells of the forest primeval
14:44gorgeous terrain
14:46hot dip galvanized steel
14:49flanged and bolted
14:51this is top quality fluming
14:54i found an oar
14:56get out of here stan
14:58leave me alone
14:59oh so you can cuckold me in here with log fario
15:02does not the bible teach us
15:04that a husband should be a woman's log fario
15:07stan
15:07i'm here because log fario hasn't responded to my text
15:11he's m.i.a and i'm worried
15:14he's stranded somewhere on this ride
15:16i'm just trying to rescue him
15:18oh and what is m.i.a
15:20flume code for man and
15:22ass
15:23oh for crying out loud
15:25we've never even met
15:26then i think
15:27and this is a term and concept that klaus created
15:30i can't take credit
15:31that you're having an emotional affair
15:32maybe
15:34maybe yeah
15:35i'm right
15:36goody
15:37stan the therapy
15:39the trip to six flags
15:40all of it
15:41i've been trying to have an emotional affair
15:44with you
15:45but you won't show up
15:48huh
15:52that was
15:53nice
15:54that's called a
15:55baby bump
15:56right
15:57yeah
15:57how do you know that
15:59flume flume room
16:00oh
16:09that was weird
16:11francine
16:11did you leave me
16:13i planned on coming back
16:16but
16:16maybe a part of me
16:18didn't want to
16:20that sucks
16:21i'm sorry
16:22no
16:23it's the truth
16:24but the way the river winds through the trees
16:26it takes the sting out
16:28anything else
16:29stan
16:30you're the most selfish man i've ever known
16:33and it's made me
16:35very tired
16:38brutal
16:39the earth is swollen
16:42groaning under the weight of miserable millions
16:45a malthusian dilemma
16:47with only one remedy
16:48you were brought into this life
16:51born on a river of sacred water
16:53and now you must leave the same way
16:56you must die
16:58what's that last thing
16:59escape is now impossible
17:01so just go with the flow
17:05and the final drop will kill you shortly
17:08permanecer sentado permanentemente
17:11can we get past the bark wire
17:14looks tricky
17:19all right
17:20don't go up that drop down
17:24pink flamingo
17:25you came you beauty
17:27luxario
17:28in the flesh mon ami
17:29you have a thick cajun accent
17:32that doesn't translate online
17:34laissez le bon temps rouler
17:36maybe now's not the time
17:38but i find the way you talk
17:40off-putting
17:41i like it
17:42i am utterly shockingly disarmed
17:44by this enchanting patois
17:46is this the flume hidden husband
17:48in the flesh mon ami
17:50van donagan dates
17:53in the flesh mon ami
17:54and i have the key
17:58this is it
17:59whoever this persona is
18:00the answer has to be in here
18:04finale ride music
18:06composed for
18:07e carmack dufrain's
18:08secret flume project
18:09van donagan deets
18:101979
18:11does this bank have a record player
18:14wow this is a great bank
18:16oh it's a crossley
18:17oh that's fine
18:19it's cute right
18:20cell phone don't work
18:21and the current back that way
18:23is strong as a
18:24tom-tom swamp gator
18:25ain't no way out
18:31francine
18:31i'm going to do
18:33the final drop
18:34what
18:35no
18:35oh you're gonna fool
18:37koo-yon now
18:37share
18:38no log thario
18:39i'm not koo-yon at all
18:41unless koo-yon means
18:43risking my life
18:43to see if this could be a way out
18:45for what it's worth francine
18:47i'm no longer an fh
18:48i love flumes
18:50or at least i love
18:51riding them with you
18:52oh stan
18:54and log thario
18:55if i die
18:56you find another way out
18:58you marry francine
18:59and you raise my children
19:01in your humble bayou shack
19:06stan wait
19:07we started this ride together
19:10we end it together
19:13the trees of the earth
19:15drink the water
19:17the water in the blood of me
19:19the water in the blood of me
19:21high in the roots
19:23rise to water
19:25the water in the blood of me
19:27the water in the blood of me
19:29the leaves unfurl with the water
19:33the water in the blood of me
19:35the water in the blood of me
19:37in the air and the sky
19:39is the water
19:41on this ride you must die
19:43it's the plan
19:48well remember anything
19:50you know what
19:51now that i've heard the song
19:53it just doesn't ring a bell
19:54none of it
19:55the song sucked
19:56i thought
19:56you can throw all of this away
20:11you did it
20:13you completed my flume
20:16oh my god
20:18it's him
20:19e carmack dufrain
20:21was it too scary
20:23i wanted it to feel real
20:25what are you doing down here
20:27i was this close to opening the ride
20:29when i got very into ketamine therapy
20:31as well as the regular non-therapeutic practice
20:34of doing lots of ketamine
20:35and i just flat out
20:36lost track of time
20:38but that's boring
20:39you know what's fun
20:41a memento to remember your trip
20:43look i got a picture of you two lovebirds going down
20:47it's twenty dollars
20:49but who can put a price on priceless memories
20:52what's that you're holding up there
20:54oh it's just a small device
20:56we won't be purchasing a picture today
21:04that's boring
21:06drag and drop
21:08then upload
21:10look at us
21:16aww
21:16lagsario liked it
21:18he must have made it out
21:19even though we forgot to tell anyone he was in there
21:22help
21:23i caught a wicked virus on e-bombs world
21:25i just wanted to see an old lady get launched off a treadmill
21:28and now i'm gonna die
21:30nooo
21:32bye bye
21:32see you soon
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