- 7 hours ago
- #bait
#Bait S01E03 [Full Movie] [Free Online HD]Full EP - Full
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Short filmTranscript
00:19ELEPHY
00:24Packing!
00:42I hear that. I really do. It's just really not a good day to me because it's Eid, so I've
00:46got to stick with family.
00:46Okay. Well, you could have stuck with the family yesterday, but now you've got to do with the shit storm
00:50you created.
00:50Is it really that bad? A lot of people seem to like the whole action and ritual.
00:54I reckon it will help them visualize me as Bond.
00:56Oh, okay. Well, there is a lot of chatter. Some people think you're a tough guy. Other people think you're
01:00insane.
01:01This could cost you the role. Oh, fuck.
01:06Saju, what happened to you when you met Felicia?
01:10This is the team. This is your agent.
01:16Remember I said wait in the car and I'm going to get the sweet tea?
01:19Don't give me a ticket because Felicia, what's going on?
01:23Same as you, just babysitting Bond.
01:25Oh, that only auntie's waiting for you.
01:27You're a disgrace.
01:28Felicia, you're going to get him the job. Yes.
01:31If it kills me.
01:33My Shah is just perfect for the job. I'll tell you why.
01:35Okay.
01:35When he was a little boy, he used to say,
01:37Mama, I want a license to kill. Remember, Shah?
01:40Oh, how specific?
01:42I don't remember that.
01:43Oh, look, he's got the military.
01:46I'll just be a minute, okay?
01:47Bye-bye, Felicia.
01:48Bye, Felicia.
01:48I'm sorry. You are a black lady.
01:58I know.
02:01What the fuck is this?
02:03You told me.
02:10Oh, you know what? I can't get into this right now.
02:12Okay, listen, none of this matters, okay? No one reads the fucking news.
02:17However, this is a big problem.
02:20The person you assaulted, you broke his arm and now he wants an apology.
02:24Sid said he was going for the giant Buddha's head, but now he's coming for you with 200,000 followers
02:29and counting, young and brown, your core fan base.
02:32Assaulted? This man ran at me with a metal object, Felicia.
02:36It was a can of spray paint, Shah.
02:38Yeah, in hindsight.
02:39I mean, the worst he could have done was tag you.
02:41Okay, fine. Just give him his apology.
02:42Okay, good.
02:43All right, so how are you going to do?
02:45Oh, no, you have to apologize.
02:47On a video by end of day or he's pressing charges.
02:49Listen, it's Ian, so I've got to stick with the family.
02:52My mom usually hosts, but I fucked that up this time. That's on me.
02:55So I can't be dealing with this. I have to be with the fan today. I have to make it
02:58right.
02:58This is about your career, Shah. Your credibility in your community for the people that you say you're doing all
03:03of this for.
03:08You've got more followers of me?
03:10Shah!
03:12Shah Latif here. Eve Mubarak to everyone celebrating.
03:15I want to address the incident at the King's Museum last night.
03:19You might have heard about it or seen it. Well, I lived it.
03:22And I want you to know that in that moment, I wasn't thinking at all. I was acting out of
03:27sheer instinct.
03:30Community is the most important thing in the world to me.
03:33And I would never take it for granted.
03:36And there's nothing more painful to me than to know that I might have hurt a member of my own
03:41community.
03:41And to know that I might have betrayed your trust in some way hurts me deeply.
03:46You're good, yeah?
03:47Yeah, I'm good.
03:48You're good.
03:50So you've come to visit us, lonely villagers.
03:55Oxford educated.
03:56But no sense.
03:58Why did you attack that young man?
03:59Don't listen to him.
04:00Come, let's take a selfie.
04:03And I want you to know that I'm going to do everything in my power to make up for it
04:07and to make it right.
04:10You should have won black.
04:13It would go better with the animal witch's gold palace.
04:17Eid is my day.
04:19It belongs to all Muslims, Mummy.
04:21It's mine.
04:22And she took it.
04:23You know one thing she doesn't have?
04:25What?
04:27Hassan.
04:28Salim.
04:29You little golden boy.
04:31I stood to buy a big shot.
04:33Always trying to compete with you.
04:35Bad shot.
04:36Probably getting a Russian prostitute pregnant this second.
04:38Don't talk filthy.
04:42Orbita.
04:44She doesn't have a main attraction.
04:46You and me can be the stars of the show.
04:49We just...
04:49Come on.
04:51You worried about what Naughty Naila thinks?
04:53Nungi Naila.
04:54Nungi Naila.
04:55Oh, my God.
04:56Nungi Naila.
04:57She always shows skin because she's got no style.
05:01Look, where is she?
05:01She's probably too busy checking herself out in the mirror to come host her own party.
05:05Head Mubarak.
05:06Oh.
05:07Such a beautiful person.
05:10Oh.
05:19Samina!
05:20It's Mubarak.
05:21It's Mubarak.
05:23So happy you could come.
05:25We've decided to co-host this year.
05:27His brother, you've done a great job, Tahira.
05:30No, but you know Naila.
05:31How do you do it?
05:32She doesn't do it.
05:34It's a decoration.
05:35It's a penthouse.
05:39The Quran says charity is a blessing.
05:41In the garden, please eat it.
05:43It's Mubarak.
05:44It's Mubarak.
05:47What the fuck?
05:48Don't leave my sight.
05:50Don't leave my sight.
05:52It's Mubarak.
05:55Hello, ladies.
05:56It's Mubarak.
05:58It's Mubarak.
06:00Sit, right?
06:03Insane seat.
06:04Now he has passed. You're the eldest.
06:06No, thank you. I'm fine standing.
06:09Baba, go you a favor.
06:11Don't tell me, yeah?
06:11Is that how you're going to kill us, Bond?
06:13By raising the blood sugar?
06:16Yeah, I'll mention that to the writers.
06:19I'm letting go.
06:22Maybe, yeah, maybe.
06:23Why don't you do a Pakistani film?
06:24Something with Mubarak Khan in it.
06:26No, no.
06:26You would do it.
06:27I'm a good one.
06:30I'm a good one.
06:34I'm not gonna be right now.
06:36I'm not going to kill you.
06:47I'm sorry, you're not going to kill you.
06:53And then it'sTYeeeee...
06:53Or I can't tell you.
06:54This is my love.
06:54It's already a good one.
06:56Mental yes fucking hot all right. Sorry. Can you my focus, please? This is the latest
07:02This guy likes you
07:07Also the whole Aladdin outfit and the Bollywood sweet shop is their community like ten times
07:12It feels like you're begging it. Maybe down the brow. I don't get it. What is a problem?
07:17I like you. What were you trying to get wife daughter? Get it to me sooner rather than later. This
07:25is not going away
07:27Hi everyone Charlotte if here now last night at the King's Museum a brother and I came into conflict
07:33I should not have reacted the way that I did and the brother in question perhaps
07:39Should not have run at me with a metal object the way that he did
07:44Muba is a community led
07:47It's not fucking community led the fact is we're all in this together and in the future
07:51I promise to use my platform not to lash out but to reach out
07:57Well, but is
08:00You want some chai or something?
08:03No, Muba. Well, we good. I'm good. Are you good? Yeah, I'm good bro. We good. I'm good. Are you
08:08good?
08:09Yeah, I'm good. I'm good then
08:11Muba, not Muba. What are you doing? Trying to focus money you are
08:15Distracting me. Oh, yes. Yo, they got them little laddus over there there with the pink and green balls and
08:19you want a big man
08:20Please I don't want laddus right now. Okay. I just want to concentrate
08:24Are you supposed to be holding on me's hand?
08:26Oh, yeah shit in a bit. Yeah, don't bring me no laddus
08:29Well before that you know
08:33Oh, yeah, I need the baby
08:33Oh, yeah, don't go tell
08:36Hey
08:38Yeah, I got it. Sorry go on, sorry go on
08:40You came in there? Where have you been?
08:41I've just been checking on Baba and Zofi
08:44Bastard you promised you're not going to leave me
08:46So if I just die standing here alone
08:48Please, please don't do this now
08:50You left me
08:51I'm sorry
08:52I'll make it up to you
08:53My name
08:53My Salim is coming
09:00Salim!
09:01Salim, my son
09:05Salim!
09:10Salim!
09:11Salim!
09:12Salim!
09:25Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
09:34Look, Mr. Tobai.
09:37Look at him, the dancing monkey doing his mother's dirty bidding,
09:41making Russian prostitutes pregnant.
09:43Look.
09:43No, he's not, mommy.
09:44That was a joke that I just made.
09:47Oh, look at that fresh prey.
09:50Zulfi, weakest of us all.
09:52Yeah, I'm good, man.
09:53I'm good, you know.
09:54Don't leave. Shaju, she's coming. Don't leave.
09:56Shavita, can I borrow your money for a minute?
09:58I need my co-host in the kitchen.
10:00Okay, we're just gonna...
10:01Okay, okay. No, no, let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go.
10:08Our KPI is the most interesting thing about this, okay?
10:10It's the retention of the customer base after that discount period, you know?
10:14It's off the charts.
10:15People want more community-driven rideshare options.
10:17Yes, Salim. Yes.
10:19What are you saying, bro?
10:19Yes.
10:20Look at this guy.
10:21You good?
10:21Yeah. Come, join us, man.
10:23Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was doing that anyway.
10:25Yeah, I got you some loaders, bro.
10:26Thank you. Thank you.
10:27That's how I never got your number.
10:29How you been?
10:29I've been good, bro.
10:30Yeah? You've been breaking shit.
10:32What do you mean by that?
10:35Glass ceilings.
10:36Thank you. Try it, man. Try it.
10:38And that guy's arm.
10:40It's just a fracture.
10:42Hey, just to bring this back to what we were talking about before you got here.
10:44Yeah.
10:45You know, our number of drivers are growing by the day.
10:47We'll be in all key five bars by June, so...
10:50Muba! Sick idea, innit?
10:51I've been there from day one, I remember.
10:53Bro, I'm so proud of this guy.
10:54Gus Smith is so proud.
10:55And you know what's amazing?
10:56He's always been an entrepreneur.
10:58If anything, he just went from selling grams to Instagram.
11:05Just out of interest, what was your credit situation with the criminal record and everything?
11:09No problems whatsoever. No issues.
11:12And just for clarity, I didn't go inside for selling mall.
11:15It's not. It's just a bit of violent disorder.
11:17It was. It was self-defense, to be honest with you.
11:19It was really before, in a way. He's a ride or die, and he was there for me.
11:21Any credit issues, though?
11:23No credit issues, because I'm going all in with everything that I've got, right?
11:26So, if you need any credit, if you need financing, just talk to me.
11:30Sorry, Jess. I was on the impression we were coming in seed round rather than, sort of, Series A.
11:35See this conversation here?
11:36This is, in fact, the closest he's been to the business.
11:40Right?
11:41And, in fact, I'll be honest with you, it's too close.
11:43Okay. Give me back my dildos, then.
11:48Even for me personally, the most important quality about Mooba is, in fact, the quality
11:53of the relationships. We're not just there for them when we want, because that's bullshit.
11:58That's fake.
12:00Get the fuck off me, bro.
12:02I don't know.
12:05And, anyway, I've always had a passion for customer service.
12:08That's my thing.
12:08That's one thing I picked up in Dubai.
12:10That's what we do best. Hospitality. That's our culture.
12:12One might say, like, the Muslim way of doing business.
12:16I love the idea.
12:17I'm going to present it to the guys, see what they say.
12:19Well, you're taking this...
12:21You're trying to get investment from Dubai.
12:25Yeah.
12:26Okay.
12:26Yeah.
12:27You been?
12:28No, I'm just saying, you know, Dubai works for people with, you know, all like...
12:33But, I mean, what the fuck's this guy going to do in Dubai, mate?
12:35He ain't going to let you in, bro.
12:37You don't want to go there, mate.
12:38I'm all in, yeah?
12:39Remember that.
12:43He was disrespectful.
12:44He referred to your quiff like that.
12:45There was no need.
12:47He looks good.
12:48Shah, got your second apology.
12:50Yeah, that's not going to work.
12:52First of all, what was up with that background?
12:54If you post that, you'll have to issue a second apology for being a rich arsehole.
12:58Also, you forgot to say sorry again.
13:01What the?
13:02First class, Naila.
13:03No.
13:05You're here.
13:07Next year, Edi's back at yours, no?
13:08No, absolutely, yes.
13:10It's very kind of you to step in this year, Naila.
13:13Tahira, don't mind.
13:16Everything's fine, right?
13:16Do you?
13:19Why?
13:20No, nothing.
13:22It's because I was watching Shanju today.
13:26I thought...
13:28I worry for him.
13:29For all of you.
13:30It's so much pressure.
13:32That's very kind of you to worry.
13:34I see a bit of your sister in him.
13:44Does Shah Jahan have someone you can talk to?
13:47He has me.
13:48Rukhaya had you too.
13:50But she needed more help, no?
13:52And Bichariya, honey, go there.
13:54She doesn't know anything.
13:55She was...
13:55Naila, please.
13:57It's all good.
13:58My son is going to be the next James Bond.
14:01We all couldn't be more proud.
14:07It's okay to talk about these struggles now.
14:09Really.
14:13It's all good.
14:15First class.
14:32All right.
14:34I am not sure that you have to do it.
14:44I am not sure that you are not sure any of this.
14:55I am not sure.
14:56I am not sure if I have to do it.
15:03It's been a long time ago.
15:12Shia, we need that apology. We're running out of time.
15:15I've literally written it out for you.
15:17Just find a quiet, neutral room.
15:20Record it and send it back now before it's too fucking late, okay?
15:47Am I interrupting, Sammy?
15:49Yeah. A conversation.
15:54Can you fucking close the door, please? Thank you.
15:57Is this like you two...
15:59I like her. Texting. Wow.
16:02So how long has this been going on? Six months.
16:05Three months? Okay, so this is nothing.
16:07Can we please not do this in front of Shia?
16:09I'm chill. I'm not going to tell anyone.
16:10Why did I come here?
16:11Can we not do this in front of Shia?
16:12I came here for you.
16:14But I never asked you to, did I?
16:15But I asked me to.
16:17Calm down. I never fucking asked you to.
16:19And this, this whole thing you're doing here, this is what I'm talking about.
16:21So just to clarify, you didn't come in to see Zilfie then for the thing?
16:24No. Yes.
16:25Does he know, by the way?
16:26Oh, fuck's sake.
16:27Yeah, he's going to find out now, isn't he?
16:29I'm not going to say anything. I've got your back.
16:30I've got your back.
16:32Look, we don't have to tell anyone.
16:34Let's just be real about what this is, because this is, this is something, right?
16:38Me and you both know it.
16:39What does that even mean, bro?
16:41You, you live a million miles away, okay?
16:44You have a whole life.
16:45You have fucking house keys, car keys, so, so many keys, okay?
16:49I have one key.
16:50I can give you keys.
16:51I don't want your keys, okay? I want mine.
16:54Yo, can I just step in here for a minute, offer maybe a different perspective
16:56from my own more mature experience, yeah?
16:59I want an honest answer from both of you, okay?
17:02All right?
17:03All right.
17:04Now, let's say, let's say you've been texting.
17:06There's some emotional ambiguity about where you both stand.
17:11All right? Yeah? You can relate, right?
17:13You send a message, a heartfelt one.
17:15Instead of it going green, it goes grey.
17:19What does that mean to you?
17:21It means you're blocked.
17:23It means you're blocked.
17:24Fuck off, really.
17:25Yeah.
17:27Let me just show you this.
17:28Okay, I'm gonna ask you to leave now.
17:29Can I show you this quickly?
17:30No, no, no. Oi.
17:31Don't say anything to anyone.
17:33I'm chill.
17:36Salim, yeah?
17:40It's not fucking chill.
17:41Come on.
17:48With Sai gone, who will lead the prayer?
17:50Pasha?
17:51Okay.
17:52Well, he recites beautifully, but I think I should lead.
17:56How will you?
17:57Seated?
17:57I won't be seated.
17:58Well, where's by? Think about it.
17:59Let someone else lead.
18:01Listen, you ass-wipes.
18:03I can run circles around you idiots.
18:05I will lead.
18:13By so desperately pursuing the role of Bond, an icon of the white establishment,
18:18Shah Latif is exchanging his political art for vanilla distraction.
18:22And so he joins a long line of brown men who think that by becoming our oppressor,
18:26he's somehow liberating all of us.
18:28And he puts a filter on his IMDB pic to look more white.
18:41Come on.
18:44Come on.
18:54Hey, Shah Latif here.
18:56I was involved in an incident last night at the King's Museum that was both unfortunate
19:00and avoidable and I'm deeply sorry.
19:03Hey, hey, hey, hey, you fucking pathetic.
19:07Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.
19:08Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.
19:10Alhamdulillahirrabbilalamin.
19:11Shah Latif here.
19:12Last night at the King's Museum, I fucked up a guy running at me with a metal object
19:17and apparently I'm the one who has to apologize.
19:19Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah.
19:21You're welcome.
19:23Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah.
19:24Hi, Shah Latif here.
19:26Literally nothing to apologize for.
19:28Trying to save my career and my life.
19:30So fuck you and your little TikTok.
19:32You little...
19:38Assalamualaikum wa ulima muhamidah.
20:04Hello?
20:07Yeah, hi.
20:08Is this Sid?
20:09Uh, yeah.
20:10Hi.
20:11Hi.
20:11This is Shah Latif.
20:13Is it?
20:14Actually.
20:15Yeah, it is actually.
20:16Bro, I just want to say.
20:18I am so, so sorry for what happened yesterday.
20:24No excuses.
20:25I was bang out of order.
20:29I just don't know what came over me.
20:31I really hope you can find it in your heart to please forgive me.
20:36Yo, I appreciate this, man.
20:40Like, I really do.
20:40I was going to call my lawyers, but then the fact you called, man.
20:45Oh, bro, he's been eating me up the whole day.
20:47I can't tell you how much this means, man.
20:49Legit.
20:53Well...
20:53Do you mind just sending me what you just said?
20:56Like, in a recording?
20:59Sorry?
21:00I need the engagement, bro.
21:02Right.
21:03I mean, I...
21:04I guess so.
21:05Nice, Ryan.
21:06Appreciate it.
21:07Alright.
21:07Oh, and thanks for the follow, mate.
21:09Just remember, keep the vid under 90 for the algorithm, yeah?
21:14Mm-hmm.
21:14I will do.
21:15Alright, see you.
21:29What is this?
21:30What is this?
21:32What is this?
21:32What is this?
21:33What is this?
21:34Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
21:34What is this?
21:35What is this?
21:36I mean, you're all right.
21:37Yeah.
21:37What happened?
21:38He fell.
21:38Move.
21:39What?
21:39What?
21:39Why wasn't he praying on a chair already?
21:41Shush, man.
21:41You wanna sit down?
21:42Yeah.
21:42Come.
21:43Easy, easy.
21:44How about how you're breathing, okay?
21:46You okay?
21:47Huh?
21:47Why didn't you sit him down?
21:48but now you want to be involved what the fuck's that supposed to mean i'm doing something for
21:51yourself don't come up me you always fucking want to be the hero and you're never all right
21:57baba is anyone getting any water i'm going to get a blanket or something
22:05are you good bro bro are you good are you dumb he's a fucking diabetic and you're giving him
22:13boxes of sweets shabazz bit up should i just fuck off again yeah you better when i'm not around that's
22:17what you're saying no no he's not my dad he's your dad shut you huh shut you you know what
22:22you think
22:22you're a fucking bad man yeah how fucking yeah my people is my how the fuck you're gonna help your
22:27people if you're too busy sucking white people's dicks he's just crying about last night bro what
22:33you came in to take me you came for a free fucking meal bro i saw you giving out your
22:36little business
22:36cards that's some sweet little minicap driver now it's not me my whole life why are you now you're
22:43trying to leech off this dickhead bro he doesn't care about your shitty ideas he's trying to chirps
22:46little sister what only jersey i love her all right what the man are you are you mad listen don't
22:54listen to him he's lost the plot he's been chatting to a pig's head in the freezer what what freezer
22:57in
22:58the garage and he's been talking to it but are you talking to a pig's head oh what if i
23:01have what if
23:01i have what if i have better listener than any of you lot well that's what happens when you're related
23:05to you guys i'm not the first family member to lose my mind hey enough
23:08i don't know what i'm talking about why is he saying that to me but what did i do what
23:18i do i'm
23:18trying to make a difference i'm not just sat there complaining about everything where you
23:22lot will judge me huh why are you touching me don't touch me i'm trying to change your world
23:27all right so anyone doesn't look at you and think you're some fucking worthless stinking
23:31peter baggy look at me get the fuck out of it what oh i've got a problem am i she
23:36blames you for
23:37what happened to your mum bro shut up
23:54oh
23:55oh
23:56oh
23:56oh
23:57Oh
23:58So
23:59Yeah
24:02Oh
24:03Oh
24:07Yeah
24:08Yeah
24:13Is
24:15Yeah
24:19Do
24:20Two
24:22One
24:22Two
24:23One
24:23One
24:24One
24:27One
24:28One
24:28One
24:31Two
24:43Oh
25:02Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
25:36Oh, oh, oh.
26:02Oh, oh, oh, oh.
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