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Taskmaster - S17E05 - Snooker Cue Umbrella Chin [Full Movie] [Watch Free Online]Full EP - Full
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00:02Oh
00:38If my social media communications are anything to go by attracts sociopathic nerds who mistakenly believe they have the right
00:46to reply
00:49Titans please welcome Joanne McNally
01:02I'm next to me a man who on a night out recently confided in me about his theory that strength
01:09of regional accent is directly related to lack of intelligence
01:16Don't shoot the messenger shoot
01:27I want to talk about something quite her grown-up a bit of adult stuff
01:33So sorry, but what what's that under there Greg what's that under there? Well, what's that under there?
01:49See you at the price does
01:51Price task and things are gonna get hot in here because we're gonna get to see their most
01:56Extraordinary pictures five points for the picture Greg thinks is the most extraordinary and one lucky winner will take home
02:01five extraordinary pictures
02:02Hello, Sophie. Oh, I love what?
02:05Extraordinary picture have you bought me? I set up a little studio in the dressing room and I made you
02:10this
02:10Oh
02:13It's the dancing bowl from episode one. Oh, that's great. Really? Well, let me give you a different take on
02:19it, Nick
02:21Why is it extraordinary though? I mean it's extraordinary to discover that you've got some level of ability art
02:31GCSE
02:33I think why it's extraordinary is look at the fur at the ends that's flight flinging off that was purposeful
02:39Could it be evolved that's very recently died I
02:45Thought it was running into a fire
02:49It's neither bad nor extraordinary
02:52Well done Sophie
02:55Nick what have you brought in well art so this is a picture that I have taken and it's a
03:01picture of a sign outside of a
03:03Church quite near where I live and I just find it extraordinary that teases is so big
03:16There's a slight raise of voice on till and Sunday as well
03:21homemade cream
03:22Tease 3 p.m. till 5 p.m. Sunday
03:26Scoot the shit out of me that
03:29It is extraordinary
03:31Thanks Greg
03:32John
03:32Hi Greg
03:33Can you beat a shouty sign?
03:34We all work in entertainment in various forms and people watching us might think it's a very glamorous industry
03:41However, my picture was taken of a comedian called Paul McCaffrey and captures the true bleakness of being a traveling
03:49comedian better than any image in the history of civilization
03:54Jesus Christ that's a builder
04:03Oh my god, I have been in that chair
04:07I love that he's being packed in a restaurant
04:10He's being recognized from a TV show and the guy taking the picture is sort of unaware of the moment
04:18of complete
04:20Sort of it's a mixture of self-hatred
04:24Yeah
04:26It's bafflement at how life turned out this way
04:29Do you know what?
04:29When I first saw it I didn't even realize that someone had taken that picture and posted it
04:33I thought it was someone Paul knew
04:35No
04:35No, it's a member of the public
04:39Wow, that's going to take some beating
04:40Joanne
04:41You said an extraordinary picture and I was like mine's more experiential
04:45Mine's a thought and movement and experience
04:48Ready?
04:49Yeah
04:49Ready for the experience
04:50I'm going to turn away and then I'm going to experience it
04:52No, you have to look at it to experience it
04:54LAUGHTER
05:01There, look, oh, Shea, yeah
05:05LAUGHTER
05:07But that's Shea Guevara
05:09I know who it is
05:11LAUGHTER
05:11On a balloon?
05:12Yeah
05:14I thought it was important to just raise awareness
05:17Oh, Shea Guevara
05:18Of Shea on a balloon
05:19Yeah
05:20And if I, if you give me the five points I will donate my fee to the Cuban revolution
05:25LAUGHTER
05:25They do have a GoFundMe, I've just found out
05:27The Cuban revolution
05:29LAUGHTER
05:31What is the political statement you were making?
05:33I'm making the statement that
05:35Balloons are, balloons are pricey
05:37That's it, inflation
05:38LAUGHTER
05:44Actually, you did say it would be extraordinarily good
05:46You just said extraordinary
05:47Mine's extraordinarily shite
05:49LAUGHTER
05:51Very great, very great
05:54Hello, Steve
05:55Hello, are you all right?
05:56What I've brought in is a photograph of two friends
05:58Here it is
05:59LAUGHTER
06:04The gentleman on the right, whose name is Glug Gravy's
06:10He was a geography teacher who took early retirement
06:13And then his friend, Alan Horns, runs a pub quiz
06:17It is sinister, isn't it?
06:19I mean, we're not, we're not great looking guys with our own faces
06:24LAUGHTER
06:26But, Jesus Christ
06:28You must have thought about it though
06:30I must have thought about swapping our faces
06:33On a long flight, all I think about is your torso
06:36And one of my eyes, one of yours, your legs, my arms
06:39And just see what, you know, see how that works
06:41LAUGHTER
06:41LAUGHTER
06:42That's funny, isn't it?
06:43It's a relatively short thing he said to me
06:45And yet I still tuned out halfway
06:48LAUGHTER
06:50Sometimes I just mark on instinct
06:51Hmm
06:52OK?
06:53I didn't find Shake of Ara's balloon going down
06:55Remotely extraordinary
06:57I'm giving it one point
06:57I don't like looking at our faces
06:59Even if they're chopped off and put on the other face
07:02I'm giving that two points
07:03I think you're perfectly good at art
07:04All right, thank you, I'll take that
07:06I'll give you three points
07:07Shouty Tees, four points
07:09The Paul McCaffrey Scream of Despair
07:12LAUGHTER
07:12Five points
07:13Well done, Paul Moria
07:14APPLAUSE
07:16Right, let's get on with the task proper, shall we?
07:19OK, then, Greg
07:19And get a load of this one, if you can bear it
07:35Alex?
07:35Nick Mohammed?
07:37Hi, yes
07:37Present
07:38Thank you
07:43Ah!
07:44What are you wearing?
07:45My special belt
07:48Hello
07:48I was hiding
07:49You were hiding?
07:50You look like a sort of action hero
07:52Or as close to an action hero as you're ever going to look
07:57Sophie?
07:58Yes?
07:58Are you all right?
07:59Just taking precautions
08:00Right, oh, God, OK
08:03Hello?
08:04Are you wearing a girdle?
08:07LAUGHTER
08:08Be the most impressive load-bearer
08:12Be the most impressive load-bearer
08:15Hmm
08:16In 15 minutes' time
08:17You would stand at the doormat
08:18Wave with one hand above your head
08:20And give a nice big thumbs up with the other
08:22Whilst bearing the most impressive load
08:27Right
08:29Your load must not be touching anything other than you
08:32Your time starts when Alex interrupts-
08:48You
08:54You
08:56I missed my opportunity
08:58I'm going to try again
09:02You have to say something
09:06I'll have to interrupt you physically
09:13I'll have to interrupt you physically
09:14Because I can
09:16Fair enough for you
09:16I'm wearing a weightlifters belt
09:23There's no reason for him to wear it
09:27He's just going
09:28Everyone look at me
09:29Everyone goes
09:29Oh, he's such a nice guy
09:30No, the guy's a prick
09:33Um
09:34OK
09:35It's all about load-bearing, right?
09:37Yeah
09:37We start with a bit of Joe
09:38And a bit of sow
09:40OK
09:40Well, I suppose I'll take that
09:41Yeah, yeah
09:43What's this for, to balance it out?
09:45It's for strong men
09:45Oh, so can I stick stuff in there?
09:47Do whatever you want, Joanne
09:50Hmm
09:51What's impressive as a load?
09:54What's an impressive load?
09:56Like, could I wear that around my neck?
09:59No
10:07Brought the bucket of balls
10:08I mean, let's build a lot of this
10:10It's just looking in that shed
10:11And sort of having a panic attack, isn't it really?
10:17Well, well, well
10:18Look at this
10:20I think it's all about
10:23Utilising different structures, isn't it?
10:25Within
10:26Your own body
10:28Are you in pain?
10:30Not at all
10:31I've never felt better
10:35So I've maximised the load
10:36By using the pegging system
10:39Yeah
10:40That's a load in itself
10:41And then I've loaded the loader
10:43And then there's some steering wheels
10:44And hula hoops around the neck for balance
10:46Oh, and a plunger in there somewhere
10:48Yeah, look at that
10:49Lovely
10:50This is good, cos then what I can do
10:52Is put the balls
10:53In the skirt
10:55Shall I pour them in?
10:57Yeah
11:02Right
11:03It's quite wet
11:04Yeah
11:05It's just quite wet
11:06So I wasn't expecting that
11:07No
11:12Release
11:14Oh no
11:16Oh no
11:21Do anyone know and saw that today?
11:22Thank you
11:29Thank you
11:30Thank you
11:30Well, interesting
11:31I thought both ladies did what we call on this show
11:34A shed panic
11:37Joanne
11:38Yeah?
11:38Did you think it was impressive?
11:39Did you think it was impressive?
11:40I mean, yeah
11:41I clipped all the cotlery individually onto that pagan thing
11:43I mean, that's the one thing I would say you did quite well
11:46Yeah
11:47Aside from that, what I wrote down is
11:49You look like an old lady who had to fall into a room of her own tat
11:55This is Sophie and Joanne
11:57They're in their impressive loads
12:01If I didn't know what this task was, I wouldn't say that woman's got an impressive load
12:09Yeah
12:09I look deranged
12:10Oh
12:11Oh
12:12I mean, you look like you've done a lot of shouting in a high street
12:18You...Sophie looks like she's turned up to a beach party that everyone has desperately tried to stop her finding out
12:24about
12:26I mean, it's hard to know which one of these two you want to turn up less
12:33Both of them are saying, I didn't get any of the Whatsapps
12:37Have you got some new statistics?
12:39Yeah, so we did weigh the amount of load they were bearing
12:43Sophie, 13.2 kilograms versus 5.4 for Joanne
12:47Half of which was the traffic cone
12:50Right, who are we going to see next?
12:52It's time to get a load of Nick and Steve
12:55They're an impressive load
12:57Bear
12:58Bear
12:59Bear
13:00Bear
13:01Got a rare tiger, don't know why
13:02But it's quite impressive
13:04Also, it's got a sort of natural
13:08How heavy is the caravan?
13:11I'm only kidding
13:13It's just some dress-up clothes
13:14If you go into the secret room
13:17The secret room?
13:18Yeah, it's in the caravan
13:19Ah
13:20It's like
13:20This is a way of sort of
13:22Being higher
13:24Have you done this whole thing before?
13:25No
13:25Right
13:26Have you found the secret room?
13:28Um
13:28This?
13:29Yep
13:29Oh my god
13:30You're kidding
13:32Oh my god
13:33This is amazing
13:35Come on Linda
13:37Nick
13:38Oh yeah
13:41Um
13:41Um
13:42Right
13:45What I'm going to do is create somebody who's riding the tiger and the tiger and the person are on
13:50my back
13:55We could do this
13:57We could do this
13:58We could do this
13:59We could do this
13:59We could do this
13:59Another six inches, Steve
14:00It's easy for you to say
14:03How to do it
14:04Still maintain some dignity
14:08That is the question
14:13Ok
14:16Oh
14:16Oh
14:17Oh
14:17Oh
14:17Oh
14:17Oh
14:17There you are
14:24It's quite windy, Steve
14:25Yeah
14:28How long have I got Alex you've got two minutes Nick we are
14:35Attempting something that's not been attempted before
14:38on UK TV
14:46You get your dignity, thank you
15:01Well Steve what is it what a showman
15:03You know what when I found out there was a secret dressing-up room
15:07I was that little five-year-old boy again and to see you acting like a five-year-old boy
15:12was very creepy
15:14One of my favorite moments on the series so far is the question and answer have you ever done this
15:19before no
15:24The way you picked that chair up I thought ah well he's obviously done street performance
15:29The confidence with which you
15:30I can pick up a chair
15:34You didn't have to wave and do the thumbs up for any certain length of time
15:37Oh, you just have to be up to it very very briefly you didn't know the load was on his
15:41chin
15:41Yeah
15:45Right I'm suspending all joy for a few minutes why with these adverts
16:04Yes
16:06Yes, and as Darwin said a man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value
16:12of life. Whoopsie
16:14Oh
16:15Contestants are trying to become the most impressive load-bearers. We only have one man left to see and his
16:20John is Robbins
16:24Oh, I don't mind that
16:27Have we got any model Greggs around because it would be quite impressive to have Greg on the old shoulders
16:33Yeah, I can get you some Greggs. Yeah, can you get me some Greggs, please?
16:41I've got some little Greggs. I've got one more big Gregg coming. So what I'm thinking is
16:47Well, it's a classic case of a gutter of Greggs
16:52John? Yes, Alex. I've got a Gregg for you. Oh, this is good stuff. The Gregg for your gutter. This
16:58is great. Gregg. This is Gregg, sorry
17:01Ladies and gentlemen, I'm proud to present the most impressive load ever carried by man or woman feast your eyes
17:11On the one and only
17:14Gutter of the Greggs
17:19Yes
17:32Ladies and gentlemen
17:33Ladies and gentlemen
17:35There is nothing we can't do
17:38With a gutter of Greggs
17:42That's your time up, John. Thank you, Alex
17:45Bye-bye
17:50You think that appealing to my ego is gonna get you points on the show, do you? Yep. Very wise
17:58Well, you just have to work out how impressed you are. So first of all, Sophie and Joanne who look
18:02like this
18:04Yeah
18:07And then the three gentlemen, uh, did these things
18:10Oh, that's, yeah
18:11We have Nick
18:12Come on, that looks good
18:13Why have they blurred the cow's face?
18:16We have Steve
18:17That doesn't look as good as I remember, Steve
18:20And then we have John's
18:23It's a bit much though, isn't it?
18:24It is?
18:25I'm sorry, Joanne, yours is the least impressive
18:28Final load
18:29One to John
18:30Five
18:32Two points for Sophie
18:33Three for Steve
18:34The narrative was impressive
18:36I'm showing humility by giving four points to John
18:38And I'm sorry
18:39The final image that I found the most impressive was old snooker cube umbrella chin and I stand by it
18:46Five points for now
18:50Can you tell me the spills?
18:51Uh, yeah, Sophie and Steve both on five
18:54John and Nick both on nine
18:57And Joanne as well
19:01What is next, young fella, my lad?
19:04Oh, well, let's just sit back and have a right laugh watching the Fresh Prince of Mid-air
19:24What on earth is going on in here then?
19:27Oh, well, that's clever, isn't it?
19:32Ooh, yeah
19:34Wow
19:36It took me a while to get it just right
19:38Yeah
19:40Magic
19:41Lovely, love it
19:44Hi, Nick
19:45Hi, Alex
19:46Could you turn the hairdryer off? It's a bit noisy
19:48Yeah, sure
19:49Ooh
19:52That is very good
19:53Yeah
19:55Oh, I saw that
19:57Pardon?
19:57Cheeky
19:58What do you mean?
19:59The string and this, there was a lot going on there
20:03Oh, I did it too early
20:09Take the most dramatic photo of yourself in mid-air
20:13You have 15 minutes and may take five photos
20:17In mid-air, I've never been a good jumper
20:20Your time starts now
20:23Well, this is going to be a health and safety ball ache, isn't it?
20:27The most dramatic photo of yourself
20:29So what I'd love is to get the hair bands that they wear, the really bad knives to your head
20:35Do you have to be actually in mid-air or could you be pretending to levitate?
20:40We've got a hairdryer
20:42We have got a hairdryer
20:49I've been doing a selfie on the top of a very tall building
20:52I've fallen and I'm plunging as I'm taking the selfie
20:57I'll have a wander
20:57Yeah, see what strikes you
20:58I'll have a wander and I think
21:00A photo of yourself in the air
21:02No, I'm going to have a wander round
21:04Yeah
21:07Yeah
21:08That hasn't been very helpful
21:09Wander round weirdly
21:15You've got a history of jumping, Sophie?
21:17No, I'm not a great jumper
21:18I'm more of a slut dropper
21:21I'm very floor-based with my moves
21:23OK
21:24Joanne?
21:24I do all my own stunts
21:26Yeah?
21:27Oh, wow
21:27Always have, always will
21:30I enjoy the adrenaline
21:32Highest you've ever jumped?
21:34No, I'm not great on measurements now
21:35I'd say like a metre
21:37Should we all have a little jump?
21:40Yeah, why not?
21:41Should we all have a little jump?
21:42Nick, you may as well sit down
21:43No, I'm quite good
21:47Three, two, one, jump
21:49It wasn't it?
21:50It wasn't it?
21:51It wasn't it?
21:52It wasn't it?
21:52Thank you
21:54I apologise
21:56Can you see them in the air?
21:57Well, we're going to see the montaging first of all
21:59and then we'll see the photos
22:00So enjoy this, Greg
22:02Right, well, we need to light a fire
22:03We can light a fire
22:04Good, let's light a fire
22:08Right
22:09Now Alex, I might need a bit of help
22:10Okay
22:11Want me to come with you?
22:12Yeah please, yes
22:15Now I've been experimenting with how to get some g-force into my face
22:19Of course you have
22:20I thought this would be quite a nice
22:23Huh?
22:24Do you feel
22:25Yeah
22:26Dreamforce in my face?
22:27Horrible
22:27Ah, yeah
22:29Wow
22:30It's my big day
22:31How's the day gone?
22:33It started out okay
22:34Things took a turn
22:36Yeah
22:37One
22:38Two
22:38Three
22:39Go
22:56I got my parachute
22:58You what?
23:00My parachute
23:02Ready?
23:05Good luck
23:06Thank you
23:10Oh no
23:11I'm going to
23:12You're going to need to take anything higher up, Alex
23:17Go
23:23You're going to give me some
23:24G-force
23:28No
23:33Ready?
23:34Any marks?
23:35Yeah
23:36Go
23:44Yeah, not bad
23:49Can you justify to me that you were in mid-air neck?
23:53You know when you put just a few things in a washing machine and it's going around quite slow
23:56They sort of there is a moment where they sort of suspend as it's kind of
23:59Yes, of course they are in technically in mid-air so that's what you were hoping for
24:02The way I interpreted it
24:04Yes
24:04Was I was watching a father of three rammed into some tires
24:08Being pushed into some baked bean cans
24:10I was very tired
24:14Okay, here is Nick dramatically in mid-air
24:23I mean you arguably couldn't be less mid-air
24:28Who's can we see next?
24:30Jilted Joanne
24:33I think you might be back in the game
24:35Taskmaster is proving to me that I have the creativity of a wheelie bin
24:41So this is a jilted bride on her wedding day
24:45She's just found out her husband's riding the nanny
24:47Did you say why she's wearing an eye pack?
24:49She's just had laser
24:50She's just had laser eyes
24:53On the way to the wedding
24:54God, she's had a bad day
24:57It's a hell of an image
24:59If you want to see the rest of their mid-air pictures you're going to have to come back promptly
25:03And if you're off for a poo, do factor in the wipe
25:05You never factor in wipe time
25:18Hello and welcome back to another life-affirming episode of Taskmaster
25:22We're partway through seeing some dramatic mid-air pictures, aren't we, Alex?
25:25Oh, we sure are
25:26And Nick rolled around in some tires
25:28The next picture is the one taken by Sophie in mid-air
25:32I mean, I cannot wait
25:42Was it another Shed Panic?
25:43No, no, I planned this
25:45I've been wanting to get him in that pigeon head from the moment I saw it
25:48People do, people do
25:52And how nice for once that it's the pigeons themselves that are covered in shit
25:57All right, who's next?
26:00Do you want to see robins in flight?
26:02Please
26:03Blood?
26:03Oh, that's great
26:05That's good
26:06He's been shot out of the cannon
26:07He's going towards the little bucket of fire
26:09No eyepatch, though
26:13Did you get in a cannon?
26:15Yeah
26:17You really want this, don't you?
26:20Yeah
26:21Look at the air
26:22Look at the air I've got
26:23I'm pleased with that
26:24You've got nice air
26:25You've got a bucket of fire
26:26You've got a pretend cannon
26:27And you've got that prick
26:28There's a lot there
26:30Who's next?
26:31The final one
26:32Have a look at Steve Pemberton in midair
26:36Oh, it's a failed parachute
26:44It's a failed parachute
26:46I like the cut rope
26:47That's drama
26:48Yes
26:49This captures the moment of realisation that he's going to splat
26:54Can you see the g-force?
26:56I hope that they would have painted out the elastic band
27:00You would hope they would have made it look like you're in midair as well
27:05I'll put all five up for you, Greg
27:07And then you can work out which is the most dramatic midair
27:09Oh, Christ
27:11OK, well, let's deal with Nick, first of all
27:13Right
27:14OK
27:16It looks like a completely different task
27:18Well, I'm going to give you one point for that
27:20Thank you
27:20You're welcome
27:21Thank you
27:22And then there's got to be a jump up
27:23I'm going to give John, Joanne and Steve four points
27:27But I'm going to give that insane pigeon madness five
27:32I don't know why
27:33I just think it's the most dramatic because
27:35Possibly because I'm worried about her state of mind
27:37Well, that's the way I'm going for it
27:39Well, that's the way I'm going for it
27:42Let's try and squeeze another one in, shall we?
27:45Oh, Vicar, isn't it?
27:48One more then
27:49And it's a tie
28:04Oh, Jesus
28:05Hey, Joanne
28:06Hi, Alex
28:07I'm going to have a little lie down
28:12Ooh
28:13Hello
28:14Hello
28:15Oh, hello
28:16Make yourself comfortable
28:17Oh, shall
28:18Oh, lovely
28:19It's nice to have a lie down, isn't it?
28:22Oh, OK
28:24I'm quite
28:27Tired
28:29There goes the task
28:30Shall I get it now?
28:31Can you reach?
28:32Yeah
28:35Oh
28:35And I've got a tie as a bonus
28:38Oh, this is nice
28:39Tie yourself to the bed
28:42Most tidal person wins
28:44You must be horizontal whilst in the lab
28:48If you pull down the terrible tie, you are disqualified
28:51Well, how do I know which is the terrible tie?
28:53Oh, you'll know
28:54Your time starts now
28:58Is, is, is going up like that horizontal?
29:02Going up like what?
29:02Like that
29:02Oh, no, that's not horizontal
29:04Is that horizontal?
29:05So this is horizontal
29:07That's horizontal
29:07So I need something to help me access
29:10Just out of reach, Alex
29:13How the fuck do I take them down?
29:18APPLAUSE
29:21I sometimes wonder whether you knew that the
29:24What the show was that you were signing up to
29:27They said the last you watched it, the better
29:29That's what they said
29:32You do fairly regularly seem incredulous about being asked to do things
29:37Let's just have a look at it
29:38OK, well, we're going to start with Jay and Jay
29:40No, not the American multinational
29:42Pharmacutical and Medical Technologies Corporation
29:45It's Joanne and John
29:46Can I levitate?
29:48I can't
29:48I'd have to levitate myself up
29:50If you could levitate horizontally, that would be perfect
29:52This is a bad idea
29:55That's not a good idea
29:56Don't hit yourself in the face with a buckle
30:00What do you need?
30:01I need the ties
30:01Yeah
30:02I obviously can
30:02Oh, no, thank you
30:05Ah, for God's sake
30:13Here we go
30:14Doesn't look terrible to me
30:16This is real 80s dad vibes
30:18Is that tied to the bed?
30:20Yeah
30:20Oh, no
30:23Some of the ties seem to have prayers on them, Alex
30:26Is it a prayer?
30:27Why do you think it's a prayer, John?
30:30What else are you going to write on a tie?
30:32That is Welsh
30:42This is something for like a really low-end brothel
30:46I hate the low-end ones
30:47At what point are you going to start tying yourself together?
30:50Maybe I'll make a start
30:51It's kind of like a survival course
30:53But I'd actually rather drink a jar of piss than do this
31:07Right
31:08Ah, this is good
31:12I don't know why I stayed the one way round for so long
31:16All right, you have still got one minute
31:21Is that the terrible tie?
31:23Pedwick, Wheeler, Clock, Goanna, Beth, Man
31:25Goanna, Cario, Yamlins
31:29You've got 20 seconds
31:30This better not be some snuff movie now
31:35Two on the head and one on the wrist, is it?
31:38Okay, I'm just going to check on the ties
31:45You're so mean, yes, it's tied
31:48The rest are good, Joanne
31:50Thanks, John
31:50You seem pretty tied up
31:53This is actually a great tie
31:59I'll be in my draft
32:05I'm so sorry that I can't give extra points for your exit
32:10It was really impressive
32:12They didn't stop me, no-one said they'd untie me
32:15At one point you announced that the experience was like a low-end brothel
32:18At the time you were a woman tied to a camp bed with one tie
32:24The lazy brothel of middle-aged men, yeah
32:27But she did well, she's got a lot of ties on
32:29Yeah, she tied herself up with 15 ties
32:31Now, John was two on the hands, one on the wrist and then 10 ties all tied together to make
32:35one long tie rope
32:36Which went round his middle and his chest
32:38Good
32:39Who's next?
32:41Okay, now it's for a tie between Bolton and Leeds, it's Sophie and Nick
32:46I'm just going to strategise here first
32:48Okay, how long are you going to strategise for?
32:50Um, just a second
32:54I think I'll do, I'm done
32:57Last in my life, you must be horizontal
32:58Sophie, does that mean that my sort of back has to be parallel to the floor?
33:02Exactly
33:02I could be on all fours, couldn't I?
33:04That's loud, isn't it?
33:06That's horizontal
33:07There's something I've missed, isn't there?
33:09Because this is what you kind of
33:12You know, this usually how it works, isn't it?
33:15There's something I've missed in the room
33:17It didn't say I need to use a tie to tie myself to the bed
33:21That was the trick
33:23Whilst in this room, I've got it, but I know what I'm doing
33:26Make sure you're horizontal
33:27Um, I am
33:28Quite a, quite a fall there, so be careful
33:29Ooh, yeah
33:31Horizontal
33:32But then as soon as I've left, I can actually be any
33:37How long have we got Greg?
33:39Pardon?
33:39Yeah, no one's ever called me Greg before
33:42Ever in the whole show
33:43Ever in the whole show, I've been waiting, thank you
33:46Right
33:49Hello
34:00I've got a lot of rope and no way of doing it
34:03I feel like there's something I've not got right here
34:07Tie yourself to the bed
34:09You've got to be horizontal whilst in the lab
34:12Whilst in the lab?
34:13I can't get out, out now
34:15You've got three and a half minutes
34:23I mean, I don't, but I don't know what this is gaining me
34:28Um
34:31I don't think I've done this one right
34:37One minute left
34:38Yeah
34:40Thread it through
34:41Thread it through
34:42Are you threading it through?
34:44Yeah
34:44With the bed on over me
34:45So there's no way I'm not roped in here
34:49Looks quite well, actually
34:50One minute left
34:51Right, oh God, quick
34:52Yep
34:58Oh, so close
35:05So you're still tied to the bed?
35:07Very much
35:07I mean, it was a very efficient tie
35:08Yeah, too efficient really
35:12There we go
35:14Bye then, Nick
35:15See you later, Alex
35:17I'll get the door, don't worry
35:18No, I am stuck now, I think
35:29My favourite moment of both of those is just hearing Nick's little voice say
35:33I don't think I've done this one well
35:35I can't actually see my face at that point, but I was crying
35:40Talk me through the strategy
35:41It was quite good, I thought
35:42I don't think I had one really
35:43You went and got a robe
35:45I did
35:45Just crawled about and got a rope and tied myself up
35:48Well, don't talk yourself down
35:49You saw what, Nick?
35:49No
35:51What was going through your mind when you were crawling around on the floor of the camp bed structure?
35:56I felt like a woodlouse that had inverted itself and just couldn't get back
36:00Once I, once I flipped, I just couldn't, there was nothing I could do
36:06But what I'm interested in is why did you flip?
36:09Yeah, well, it's a good question
36:11Yeah, yeah
36:13That's another part done, join us for part four
36:15When one lucky winner has to look happy on stage with a deflated Che Guevara balloon
36:20This is prime time baby, they can't take the BAFTA off us now
36:36The last part of the show and there is a tricky tie task which needs completing
36:40That's right, Greg, they're trying to tie themselves up
36:43as best as possible while lying horizontally,
36:45but if during the process they pull down the terrible tie, it's all over.
36:50Finally, a man perhaps best known for his role as Mattis
36:53in Free Jimmy, the 2006 animation which also starred Woody Harrelson.
36:56It's Steve Pemberton.
36:58LAUGHTER
36:59Ooh, now you're talking.
37:01I want to hire the bed, so if I come off here...
37:04I thought there'd be a way to screw...
37:08Oh, bollocks.
37:13Is this the horrible one?
37:15Oh, it's something in Welsh.
37:19Gah!
37:22This is, like, sort of hook-a-dup, but...
37:27with ties and lying down.
37:29I want different body parts involved.
37:31Oh, thank you, God. The tie gods are shining down on me.
37:36Oh!
37:39Yeah, oh!
37:43Ah!
37:45Look, I can't keep up with the number of ties the tie gods are giving me.
37:49It's a whole tirade!
37:52Oh!
37:5320 seconds.
37:54OK. I think I'm done to enjoy it now.
37:56Five seconds left.
37:58OK.
37:58WHISTLE BLOWS
37:59But if you could leave the lab now, that'd be great.
38:03LAUGHTER
38:04We let him know.
38:06APPLAUSE
38:08He was so violent with the mechanism, he whacked it,
38:11and he put it off at an angle so they couldn't...
38:13They had nowhere to go but fall on top of Steve.
38:14And he tied 28 ties...
38:16Oh.
38:17..attached themselves to the bed.
38:18Each of his fingers was tied up.
38:20Individual fingers, mouth, head, pelvis...
38:22Not through the pelvic bone, but...
38:24No.
38:24No.
38:25I mean, do you want to win or not?
38:27LAUGHTER
38:29Let's talk about this Welsh tie business.
38:31They weren't prayers.
38:32No, they were my family mottos.
38:33There's the green one.
38:34That's the one that Joanne got.
38:35Obviously, that says, er,
38:37know what you want and have the confidence to go after it.
38:39That's what I wore on my stag night.
38:40No.
38:42Joanne and John both got the yellow one down.
38:44Don't wash the clock.
38:46Do what it does.
38:47Keep going.
38:47I wore that on my wedding day.
38:48Er, purple.
38:50Steve got the purple one, which says,
38:51whoever is happy will make others happy too.
38:54And then the red tie, of course.
38:55Er, my dad's tie, which says,
38:58this is a terrible tie,
38:59and that was brought down by Mr Steve Pepperton.
39:04Of all the ties to rain down on me.
39:07Poor Steve is out.
39:09I liked Sophie's attempt and I thought the rope was impressive,
39:11so I'm going to reward it.
39:13Woo!
39:13Most tied-up person wins.
39:14She was the most tied-up person.
39:16Yes!
39:16And then we'll do it according to the amount of ties.
39:18That were used.
39:19OK, well, it's two points to Nick,
39:20three to John,
39:20four to Joanne,
39:21five points to Sophie Willen!
39:23All right.
39:24Well, well, well.
39:28Do you want me to look at the scores?
39:29Yes, Sophie's got a chance of winning.
39:30She's on 15,
39:31John is on the top with 16 points.
39:33Ah, still ahead.
39:37She's in with the show.
39:39All right.
39:40Well, here we are.
39:41Make your way to the stage,
39:42final task of the show!
39:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
39:50What's cooking good looking?
39:51Who's reading the task out?
39:53Er, I think Steve Pemberton's going to read this one out.
39:55Is he?
39:56Oh, yes.
39:58Park a vehicle in the parking bay.
40:00Your vehicle must be rolled whilst standing on the spot
40:04and the worst parker each round is eliminated.
40:07It's a parking challenge.
40:08We have four parking bays there.
40:11So, in round one,
40:11you've got to try to park one of these vehicles
40:13in parking space number one.
40:15So, you can now write down what order
40:16you want to park your vehicles.
40:19As always happens in this show, Greg,
40:21the person in the lead goes first.
40:23On this occasion, it's John.
40:24So, John, you have selected the car.
40:26Yep.
40:26You must stay on the gold circle.
40:28You're aiming for parking bay number one.
40:31John, park that car.
40:34BUZZER
40:34BUZZER
40:36BUZZER
40:36BUZZER
40:38BUZZER
40:38It's not a bad start.
40:40It's popped into two.
40:43LAUGHTER
40:43Right, is Sophie next?
40:45Bring your little version of yourself with you.
40:48BUZZER
40:49That's lovely.
40:51BUZZER
40:52BUZZER
40:53No!
40:53No, it's gone too far!
40:55BUZZER
40:56BUZZER
40:56BUZZER
40:57BUZZER
40:58It's not a disaster.
41:00It is a bit, let's be honest.
41:01It's not great.
41:03Nick, you're up next.
41:05And you've selected the buggy.
41:07Yes.
41:08You can just slot your little legs.
41:10My own?
41:11Well, either side.
41:12LAUGHTER
41:16BUZZER
41:17BUZZER
41:20BUZZER
41:20He's definitely made it through to round two.
41:22I can tell you that.
41:23APPLAUSE
41:24Oh, yeah.
41:25OK, Joanne McNally, you're up next.
41:27OK.
41:27You have chosen the horse.
41:28Yeah.
41:30BUZZER
41:30BUZZER
41:31BUZZER
41:32BUZZER
41:33It's safe.
41:33She is safely through.
41:34Well done.
41:36APPLAUSE
41:37Right.
41:38Finally, it's Steve Pemberton.
41:39What have you selected, first of all?
41:40I've selected the trolley.
41:44BUZZER
41:44BUZZER
41:46BUZZER
41:46BUZZER
41:47BUZZER
41:47BUZZER
41:47Yeah.
41:49Is it enough?
41:50Let's have a look.
41:52Arguably, Sophie's only chance at winning an episode
41:55has just been dashed against the rocks.
41:58God.
41:58Unfortunately, Sophie, you've been eliminated in round one.
42:01And I must take small Sophie away from you.
42:04No.
42:04Yeah.
42:06No.
42:07Sit on the bench of shame.
42:09LAUGHTER
42:10Sit on the wall?
42:11It's a bench of shame.
42:12It is that.
42:13Right, round two.
42:13But, John, you're up first.
42:14You've picked the trolley.
42:15So, if you want to mount the trolley.
42:19BUZZER
42:21BUZZER
42:21BUZZER
42:21BUZZER
42:23BUZZER
42:23BUZZER
42:24BUZZER
42:24This is a number.
42:25Oh!
42:25Oh!
42:27Oh, gosh, yeah.
42:28BUZZER
42:29BUZZER
42:30It's hard to get the balance right with that trolley.
42:34BUZZER
42:41BUZZER
42:41BUZZER
42:42BUZZER
42:43BUZZER
42:43BUZZER
42:44BUZZER
42:47BUZZER
42:48BUZZER
42:48BUZZER
42:50BUZZER
42:51BUZZER
42:51BUZZER
42:52BUZZER
42:52BUZZER
42:52BUZZER
42:53BUZZER
42:54BUZZER
43:00BUZZER
43:02BUZZER
43:02BUZZER
43:02BUZZER
43:02BUZZER
43:03BUZZER
43:05BUZZER
43:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:10Oh.
43:12I've got to say, despite being in the drop zone,
43:15I didn't want to see that.
43:18Steve, you're up. What have you chosen?
43:20I've chosen the buggy.
43:23You step on that board, I'm going to come up there like a windmill.
43:30Oh, that's lovely. This is looking good. That is lovely.
43:34CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:35CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:38That is how you park a child.
43:41John's out. Thank you.
43:45OK, it's the penultimate round.
43:49So, John, you're aiming for parking bay number three, of course.
43:52OK.
43:54Oh.
43:56It's very lovely.
43:58It's very lovely.
44:00APPLAUSE
44:02OK, you've seen how to do it.
44:04Good luck, Nick.
44:06Good luck, Nick.
44:08Oh!
44:11APPLAUSE
44:14I think I'm out.
44:15Well, still, Steve, he just needs to not do that.
44:19The slightest shove will do it, Steve. What have you picked?
44:21I've got a horse as well.
44:23John, any advice on the horse?
44:24Just whack it right off the end.
44:26Whack it right off the end.
44:29Ooh.
44:31Oh, lovely.
44:32Oh, lovely.
44:32He's made it for you.
44:33Well done.
44:36Greg and Fred, we have to say goodbye to Nick Muhammad.
44:43OK, so it's Pemberton versus Robins,
44:46and it's been a theme of the series so far.
44:48In the final round, you both push at the same time.
44:52Oh!
44:53A twist?
44:54Yes.
44:55Oh, my God.
44:56This to the glue factory now?
44:59Get in your vehicles, guys.
45:01Clear the nappet.
45:03Oh, that's lovely to see.
45:08You must roll on the whistle.
45:10I am genuinely excited.
45:13Three, two, one.
45:15Ooh.
45:17Oh, my God.
45:21Pemberton!
45:23Pemberton takes it!
45:33That is classic Pemberton!
45:37Well done.
45:38We'll add that to your final scores.
45:40Come down and join me.
45:40Well done.
45:48I'll tell you what, Pemberton can park.
45:50It's not me.
45:51It's the little guy.
45:52I have totted up the scores now, Greg,
45:55and those five points for Pemberton
45:57have very little bearing on the final scores
45:59because the third episode in a row
46:01has been won by Mr John Robbins!
46:03Oh, my God!
46:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:07John Robbins wins!
46:10Please pick up your extraordinary pictures!
46:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:34The champion of the night,
46:36Mr John Robbins!
46:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:05and be a facilitator.
47:06We'll give us a round of applause.
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