- 19 hours ago
Taskmaster - S21E02 - Leg Up Johnny [Full Movie] [Full Story]Full EP - Full
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:02Don't look away
00:16I might just do this all day
00:34Thank you welcome to taskmaster a herd of comedy wildebeest being whittled down by the natural selection of their own
00:41incompetence
00:42What lies in wait for them at the watering hole today? Huh?
00:45Let's get in the Jeep Jeep and go and find out. I hope it's not a comedy crocodile
00:51Please welcome
01:09Who's favorite films he tells me and a carry-on films because it reminds him of a golden time in
01:14mainstream culture
01:15When women could be openly objectified and it was okay to acknowledge that some foreign accents are just hilarious
01:31Let's get married
01:32See senior Davis and the prize task category this week is the most
01:37Unquestionable thing of beauty
01:39Yes, it's clear-cut. It's unquestionable and yet he will question them and judge them and give maximum points for
01:45the most
01:46Unquestionable one such is his right and that was a reading from Corinthians chapter 9 verse
01:5118 let's do this who should we have first Joanna page my thing of unquestionable beauty is
01:58Unquestionable evidence of the fact that I was voted Wales is sexiest woman in 2009
02:09This is what you brought him to represent unquestionable beauty
02:17Right, but this isn't mine. This is taken from my mother's scrapbook
02:21And this is going on like 20 years old and she still has this and she has this because she's
02:27proud of me
02:28Yeah
02:28And if this doesn't say about the unquestionable beauty of a mother's love for her daughter
02:34Then I don't know what does and I get me here
02:42I
02:43Think that is a very strong star. Thank you. Right. We're off come out
02:47I brought in something that I find to be very beautiful and I cannot believe my friend found it in
02:51the trash. Oh, what look at this Greg
02:55It's a painting that is absolutely gorgeous. I just looks like this ghostly child's being held captive
03:02It's grotesque. Thank you. Can we look at the back of it, please? Yeah, the back looks like this. It
03:09says T-pain
03:11Why does it say the name of the king of otter tune on the back because it's art Greg and
03:16I think the paintings haunted
03:18I've been trying to get rid of it for years. I
03:21Didn't even ship it here. It was just in my hotel room when I checked. I really hope I lose
03:26this episode
03:28Well, you're off to a great start
03:33I don't it's my wife took it. She's not a very good photographer. She said it was an accident. Yeah,
03:38this is a photo of Amanda, so
03:44Actually shows just the hope I'm question a beautiful the whole of planet Earth is the the nature the
03:54Unbelievably insignificant we are as part of it. I don't know how insignificant the haunting egg island
04:02That's right Amy. I have brought a painting of Yorkshire as I think Yorkshire's beautiful and I've made a very
04:09special
04:10Frame which I'd like to show you which I think makes it even more beautiful. Well, take a look at
04:15this
04:24You did the painting my friend poppy hilstead from Yorkshire. Yeah
04:28I like it very much Joel. What have you brought us? I've also gone for a painting Amy. Take a
04:37look at this Greg
04:46I know what you've done. I know what you've done. You know what I've done. I know what you've done.
04:51It's your head and that's your body
04:53Oh my oh, is it your body? It's your body and it's Greg's head and that's little Alex Horne on
04:58the pants
04:59Yeah, I see that. You and I make a great hybrid
05:04I saw so sad because I'll never get to see that in real life. Really, it's just that head on
05:10top of a bag of suet
05:14Right, do you know score these yeah, it's tough. Mmm, because I was quite touched by all but one
05:23There's one to come out and you'll thank me for that
05:25I think there's got to be a gap between creepy child and the others. I'm gonna give muscly me three
05:30points muscly me
05:32Okay, so three points to Joel. I'm gonna give Armando's head island four points. Thank you
05:37the general populace would love the bond between mother and daughter and
05:42The people of Yorkshire would love to be celebrated by a picture surrounded by Yorkshire pudding
05:48And thus five points each to the two ladies. There we go. Five points to Amy, five points to Anna
05:55Yes, and we begin with something you and I struggle with before every recording Greg kissing no
06:01It's what to wear
06:17Amy big deep breath in you go
06:22Okay, oh
06:24Do you like the acoustics? Yeah, whoa
06:28Yeah, it makes my skull vibrate
06:31Is it warm in there? It's warm. I'm loud feel like I should be grabbing money at the end of
06:36the crystal mates. What's that?
06:38Oh, it's another shot. No, it was popular before this one was I want to keep the seals. I'm gonna
06:44keep all these seals
06:45for eBay
06:48It's lovely and sunny. Oh my god
06:50Choose how much of Alex's bowling outfit to wear throughout part two
06:57If you choose Alex's bowling overalls your final time will be reduced by two minutes
07:02If you choose Alex's bowling gloves your final time will be reduced by three minutes
07:08If you choose Alex's bowling glasses your time will be reduced by four minutes
07:14If you choose Alex's bowling shoes your final time will be reduced by five minutes
07:20So if you choose to wear Alex's whole bowling outfit your final time will be reduced by 20 minutes
07:30You have one minute
07:32Your time starts now
07:33So the more I choose my final time will be reduced by 20 minutes, so that's good
07:38I want to reduce my time
07:40Who knows?
07:41There may be a hindrance
07:42There may be
07:43I'm going to go for bowling overalls
07:45Bowling overalls?
07:47I'm going to put your bowling glasses on
07:49Okay
07:50So I will wear the shoes and the gloves
07:55Your time will be reduced by eight minutes
07:57I'm going to wear the whole outfit then, am I?
08:00Overalls, gloves, glasses and shoes
08:02Yeah
08:03I choose to wear your whole outfit
08:05Good stuff, I'll bring it to you now
08:11Oh, God
08:16So who are the two people that chose the whole outfit?
08:19What's your thinking with that?
08:20This is quite interesting about this show
08:22You know, it makes you realise who you are as a person
08:25Yeah
08:25You know, and I've realised I'm really excited
08:29Yeah
08:29And fucking stupid
08:32Let's see what the skittle outfits did, shall we?
08:34Yes, well, decisions have been made
08:36Will they regret those decisions?
08:37Of course they will
08:44Oh, hi Joanna
08:49Hello
08:50You're wearing my bowling glasses
08:51I am
08:52They're very nice
08:54Yeah, they help
08:56I did say
08:57There's something Guantanamo about this whole process, didn't I?
09:02Yeah, I strongly disagree with that
09:04I think I've got my technique down
09:06Yeah
09:07And I've never worn these
09:09You look good
09:10You look?
09:12Yeah
09:12You wouldn't lie to me now
09:13I know
09:14Well, yeah, please be careful
09:17Find and open the task
09:18And give it a good read
09:32There we go, well done
09:34Get the bowling ball in the bucket
09:38You must stay on stage at all times
09:41You must stay on stage at all times
09:42There is a two-minute time penalty
09:45But any skittle touched
09:47And all skittles must be standing when the bowling ball enters the bucket
09:53Fastest wins
09:54Your time started when you stepped on the stage
09:56Where's the bowling ball?
09:57Oh!
09:58All right
10:00Oh, no
10:06The thing I already love about this group of contestants is that none of them might
10:11Like when you find out it's some awful outfit that's going to make things so much worse
10:16You are like
10:16Ha, ha, ha
10:18Joanna just
10:19Ran a real good foundations
10:24To put on
10:25Yeah
10:26Okay,
10:27Let's bowl
10:27Up first it is Amy G
10:29And Joe P
10:30myself
10:31Get the bowling ball in the bucket
10:37On the stage
10:38It's quite near the skittles
10:39It's right near the skittles.
10:42Oh, I can see it!
10:45Oh, right, OK.
10:48Get the bowling ball in the bandit!
10:52Oh, shoot!
10:53Oh, my God, no!
10:56No! No!
10:59Oh, my God!
11:04The good news is, you've only touched one skittle.
11:06Oh, my God, do I have to put all of these back up for when it goes in?
11:09I think so.
11:10OK. Oh, my God!
11:12This isn't how I expected this to go.
11:15All right, all right!
11:18Standing them up, one at a time.
11:22Oh!
11:23OK, oh, my God, no, don't!
11:30Oh, no, don't!
11:33Oh, no, don't!
11:35No!
11:35No!
11:38I reckon I'm on for losing this task.
11:42Naughty dogs!
11:44I'm running away.
11:48Three left.
11:50Two left.
11:51Is it all up?
11:54Stop the clock! Stop the clock!
12:01It's sort of quite poetic, the way that they both just went boom!
12:04It was poetic, yeah.
12:06But they all had to be standing up when the ball went in the bucket.
12:08And they did badly.
12:10Amy took 32 minutes.
12:14But you saved 20 minutes while wearing the full outfit.
12:16Oh, yes, yes.
12:17But you did touch every single skittle.
12:19That's 54 skittles.
12:20Two-minute penalty per skittle, so that's a punishment of 108 minutes.
12:24Plus the 12 minutes.
12:25You took exactly two hours.
12:28Wow!
12:29Joanna, you actually only took 5 minutes 59 to get...
12:31Really?
12:32Wow!
12:32And also touched every single skittle,
12:34so your total time was 109 minutes and 59 seconds,
12:37so you're about 10 minutes quicker.
12:38You're in the lead.
12:39Yes.
12:39Now, in a sad reflection of the state of our society,
12:43we must pause for some gambling adverts.
12:45I don't think it's advert time.
12:47You want to bet?
12:48Yes.
13:02Hello!
13:03We're back and it's part two and there's a ball
13:05that badly needs to be banged into a bucket.
13:08Who's next?
13:09That's right, kids.
13:10It's Joel and Amanda.
13:12I don't regret my decision.
13:14I bet you're all thinking that I regret it.
13:16You guys can absolutely do one.
13:19Ooh!
13:21Stick the number of skittles to I touch.
13:25Do be careful.
13:27Two minutes each.
13:28See you later.
13:31One.
13:32One?
13:34Well, I might do two.
13:36Don't regret it.
13:41This will be very heavy.
13:44Oh!
13:46Where is it?
13:48Oh, Jesus!
13:57Were they standing when the ball went in the bucket?
14:01You have it on record.
14:02You filmed that, didn't you?
14:07You're putting your hopes on the freeze frame
14:09with that ball going in the bucket,
14:10they're still on their feet, these skittles.
14:11Yeah.
14:12Task complete.
14:16Nearly!
14:21Two four.
14:23Oh!
14:24Oh, fuck off!
14:25It's off!
14:27Shit!
14:28Shit!
14:33BELL RINGS
14:35BELL RINGS
14:52Don't regret it.
14:52No.
14:55Don't regret it.
14:58I don't regret it.
14:59No.
15:01I don't regret it.
15:10I don't regret it.
15:11Stop the clock!
15:13Wow!
15:14I don't regret it.
15:35What a shit.
15:37Yeah.
15:38Yeah.
15:38Oh, he is!
15:39He is a little shit!
15:40Oh, God, yeah.
15:40Oh, God, yeah.
15:41I'd make it easier. You didn't have to... Yeah, yeah, yeah.
15:47Who'd have thought that your fingers scrambling around
15:50trying to get into a bowling ball would be so tense?
15:53I kind of enjoyed the drama of it, watching it back.
15:55Oh, Christ, I was on the edge of my seat.
15:56You were very close to nailing the task.
15:58You were quick. Three minutes, 20, you put the ball in.
16:00And you did offer me the option of then saying,
16:03you've got time to pick them all up.
16:04And I thought, that was funny. I want to just stop at the funny.
16:07And also, I couldn't be bothered.
16:11Do you regret not regretting it with the wisdom of hindsight?
16:13I think it was absolutely fine.
16:15You know, it was an adventure.
16:17And hopefully that adventure didn't cost me too much time.
16:19You were almost exactly the same as Amy,
16:21because you touched every single skittle,
16:23you were wearing all the outfits, so it was minus 20 but plus 108.
16:26And you took 28 minutes and 46 seconds,
16:29so you were ever so slightly quicker than Amy.
16:31I don't regret it.
16:33Who's next?
16:34Yes, well, there's only one person left to see.
16:37According to his resume, he's agile, he's strong, he's sexy,
16:41he's smart.
16:42And he's made for exactly this sort of task.
16:44Yes, he's Kamel Nanjani.
16:55I've touched two skittles.
16:56Yes.
16:59Yes.
17:01Yes.
17:02Yes.
17:03Okay, you've not touched that one.
17:05No.
17:06Clever.
17:11All right, I'm learning.
17:15Okay.
17:25This feels like a big moment.
17:44This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.
17:56Oh...
18:04Get her, get the water.
18:06We're getting a cramp.
18:07Hold on.
18:17Can you get me banana yeah, I'm just going now
18:30Thank you
18:33Are you in quite a lot of pain yeah, I could offer you a certain amount of time per skittle
18:39And I could give you a hand you could what you can give me a hand well
18:45Yeah, how much if I'm touching them that's two minutes per skittle. I'll give you one minute, but I don't
18:50benefit from that
18:5185 seconds
18:54Okay, yeah sure
18:56Okay
18:5985 seconds
19:03170 seconds
19:20It did go in the bucket it's not in the bucket it was in the bucket for a moment
19:2518 seconds
19:2618 seconds
19:3818 seconds
19:4018 seconds
19:47Like there were very clever things that you came up with the not touching the skittles system. Thank you
19:52And I thought ah that's clever and then very quickly after I thought I'm not gonna have to watch him
19:57move all of them
19:59I
20:00Decided that no matter how long it took I was going to get them done
20:04And I was only going to touch two skittles
20:06You did touch four in the end and you took nearly 40 minutes to do it
20:10But because of my bargaining the maths means that the 85 second penalty per skittles that I touch
20:15You actually got it in 55 minutes and 13 seconds. You actually were the fastest out of the five of
20:20them. I won that
20:21We won this
20:27Let's get some points out you. Okay. Well, Armando did not really finish the task. Couldn't care less
20:34I don't regret it
20:36Zero to Armando we jump up then Amy two hours two points somehow
20:41Joel nearly two hours three points. Joanna also nearly two hours four points, but the winner of the task five
20:47points. It's come out
20:48Do you think you can see a scoreboard please I do Armando you won't be surprised here
20:55You're currently in last place four points and at the top she won the first episode. She's winning this one.
20:59Joanna page has nine points
21:04Next one, please. Okay, but let's just slow down a moment and take some time to reflect
21:22Oh
21:26Hello
21:31Oh
21:38My god, I thought it was a mirror
21:42Shout out to the art department
21:48Incredible
21:50Right, okay. Oh, they oh hello
21:53Right. Yes. Ah, yes. Yes
22:01Hey, Alex
22:02Come out
22:04Oh
22:08No, didn't think so. Shall I? Yes, please
22:12Okay, that was great man
22:15Like exhilarate exhilarating. Yeah
22:18Do exactly what your reflection does you must decide what alex does then mirror him most ambitious
22:24But also accurate mirroring wins you have a maximum of 20 minutes
22:30Your time starts now
22:31Okay
22:33So I've got 20 minutes to decide what my my me do for
22:37Okay
22:40So I decide
22:42What you do and then I do it with you
22:45Ideally something I'm good at
22:48I just need to think about ambitious
22:51Yes, I'll leave you to it. Yeah
22:53Can you do a handstand? No, can you? Yeah
22:56Ah
22:58You could teach me like I feel like we should learn a dance 20 minutes
23:02I think like we could like get it down scoop scoop and I'm gonna keep that way scoop scoop
23:08Let's get a couple easels and then we'll paint and what are we gonna paint that's up to you
23:14You know what? I think you paint whatever you want to paint all you've got to do
23:18I don't even know if I can genuinely do a handstand now. I'm
23:2148 and I've had four children. I'm gonna try and see if it's possible. Are you ready?
23:25Okay
23:27It's not possible
23:38Oh my god
23:41That's so good
23:42Oh my god
23:44I can't think we're ever gonna see anything less ambitious than the time between you announcing you can do a
23:51handstand and the reality
23:52Oh my god, I really thought I could still do them
23:55When was the last time you did one?
23:57Probably when I was about 12
24:00So ambition
24:01It's ambition and accuracy, Greg. Mmm, gotta factor in here
24:04Oh, I'll factor that in, don't you worry
24:06Well, let's go with Amy who went to some pretty extreme lengths to make me appear just like her
24:19I'll fake her
24:20If you moved in
24:23If you moved in
24:26Yeah
24:27Oh my god
24:32You live in
24:35No
24:35No
24:35Oh my god
24:39Untertitel
24:41And I'm an extremely
24:41MUSIC CONTINUES
24:58The accuracy was high, I thought. Thank you. Very good.
25:02I am somewhat confused by you dressing as Barry Gibb.
25:07LAUGHTER
25:09The shoot dance was good. There was lots going on.
25:12There was lots of accuracy. It's a hell of a start.
25:14Next, it's Joel. And if you're wondering if he took his top off...
25:18LAUGHTER
25:19..there are no spoilers here.
25:22LAUGHTER
25:29MUSIC CONTINUES
25:30MUSIC CONTINUES
25:36LAUGHTER
25:37MUSIC CONTINUES
25:52MUSIC CONTINUES
25:54LAUGHTER
25:55LAUGHTER
25:58APPLAUSE
26:00APPLAUSE
26:01That was good.
26:03Nice homoerotic thing.
26:05LAUGHTER
26:06I've seen all week.
26:08We were facing away from each other, so that's really difficult.
26:11The level of difficulty is absolutely incredible.
26:14And we took our tops off. That's fun, right?
26:16Yeah, yeah.
26:17Yeah, I was probably more drawn in by you taking your tops off and kissing.
26:21LAUGHTER
26:22Time for an advert break, I think.
26:25We'll see you in a minute.
26:26LAUGHTER
26:27MUSIC CONTINUES
26:32MUSIC CONTINUES
26:32MUSIC CONTINUES
26:35APPLAUSE
26:35Hello!
26:36Yes!
26:37Don't you worry, we're still here.
26:39The current task has seen our art department excel
26:42with a mirror illusion in a lab.
26:44And now it's Kamel looking in the mirror, as per bloody usual.
26:48LAUGHTER
26:50MUSIC CONTINUES
26:51MUSIC CONTINUES
26:51MUSIC CONTINUES
26:53MUSIC CONTINUES
27:04MUSIC CONTINUES
27:05MUSIC CONTINUES
27:08MUSIC CONTINUES
27:09MUSIC CONTINUES
27:09MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:11MUSIC CONTINUES
27:12MUSIC CONTINUES
27:14MUSIC CONTINUES
27:17MUSIC CONTINUES
27:37How did you feel that went?
27:39I can't paint, so I don't know why I chose to do that.
27:43But isn't that ambitious, ironically?
27:46That's why I did it.
27:48You know the thing that vexed me the most about it?
27:50Yes. You missed one of the rabbit's giant ears off.
27:53I didn't, I put both ears on the same side.
27:56On the same side?
27:57I did.
27:58What's next?
27:59Will it be a handstand performance next?
28:02Definitely not, because it's Joanna Payne.
28:16MUSIC CONTINUES
28:17MUSIC CONTINUES
28:22MUSIC CONTINUES
28:44What I'm interested in is the narrative of your dance.
28:47I don't think I was even, like, human.
28:50We were sort of just emotional and it was, like, exhilarating
28:53and sort of finding some of this freedom together
28:55on an emotional plane.
28:58Ah.
28:59And then, after going round like that,
29:01that was a huge release.
29:02This is making me look at steps in a whole different way.
29:05LAUGHTER
29:07And then, from what emerged from that was,
29:09I can birth and bring life in...
29:12It's the love of a mother and a daughter!
29:15Exactly!
29:16Exactly!
29:18Wow!
29:19Wow!
29:20Wow!
29:21I enjoyed the analogy.
29:23Erm, I suspect...
29:25..it was all horse shit.
29:27LAUGHTER
29:27Is there anyone left to see?
29:29Let's go.
29:29It is Armando's attempt now.
29:31Unfortunately, he wasn't actually available on the day,
29:33so instead, he sent Ben Kingsley in to do it for him.
29:37LAUGHTER
29:38Let's have a look at Ben Kingsley.
29:50MUSIC CONTINUES
29:51MUSIC CONTINUES
29:54MUSIC CONTINUES
30:26MUSIC CONTINUES
30:31Oh, my God. I enjoyed that.
30:33I mean, speaking of, as a man of a similar vintage to you,
30:36just throwing yourself on the floor was ambitious.
30:39Yeah, bit of slapstick.
30:40Why did you decide to cast yourself as Ben Kingsley, sir?
30:42No, I was just trying to look like him.
30:44We were trying to meet in the middle, I think, was the idea.
30:45Well, I went that way. Yeah, thank you.
30:48Was Ben Kingsley known for diving?
30:50That's why I was watching you, like, is there a reference?
30:52Let's just forget Ben Kingsley.
30:55It was me. It was just trying to look like him.
30:57That was you?
31:01I mean, that's how good it was.
31:04Apart from Camels, obviously, I loved them all.
31:07LAUGHTER
31:09One point. OK.
31:10One point to Camel.
31:11They were all pretty powerful from this point onwards.
31:14So, let's look at accuracy.
31:17Probably Joel's was slightly less accurate than the others.
31:19Yeah, I can understand that.
31:20And I'm going to give you two points, but I think it's harsh.
31:22I'll tell you that. That's all right.
31:23Now, how accurate was the universe?
31:28Slightly less accurate than the Shoup Shoup, I think.
31:31So, whilst it was a powerful statement about life, I can only give you three points.
31:36I'll take that.
31:37I'm going to give Amy four points, because it was incredibly accurate.
31:40That is harsh.
31:41The one that moved me the most, and was also accurate, and I think it will open up new doors
31:46for him.
31:46LAUGHTER
31:47Finally.
31:49Armando Iannucci takes five.
31:50Good.
31:51Five points going on here.
31:53APPLAUSE
31:55What is next?
31:56Well, it is my idea of heaven.
31:58Lots of instructions, a secret code, and a really big balloon.
32:01Mmm.
32:15Hello?
32:17Everything all right in there?
32:19I think so.
32:20Present.
32:22Present or present?
32:24Great question.
32:26This is your sort of thing.
32:27This is my sort of thing?
32:28I think so.
32:29Do you reckon?
32:30What is my sort of thing?
32:31Fun?
32:32Fun.
32:34Right.
32:35Achieve the most things on this list.
32:38Before the balloon pops.
32:40If you do the special thing, the balloon will stop inflating for ten seconds.
32:46Ten seconds?
32:47If you do the special thing?
32:53I feel like I haven't been looking around for alternate solutions.
32:57You must not touch the balloon mechanism.
32:59Your time starts when the balloon starts inflating.
33:04The special thing...
33:05Oh, my God.
33:06Oh!
33:07Oh, gosh!
33:07Right.
33:09OK.
33:10Right.
33:11God.
33:12What's the special thing?
33:13Stop inflating!
33:18You thought the special thing might be to say stop inflating, did you?
33:21I thought it was worth a shot.
33:24Well, this is all pretty self-explanatory, I think.
33:27I don't want to dwell.
33:27I just want to crack on and have a look.
33:29Fair enough.
33:29They were under pressure.
33:30They had to achieve a lot of different things.
33:31And we're going to begin with three of the five.
33:33And that is Joanna, Joel and Amy.
33:36One.
33:37Thread a needle.
33:40Yes.
33:41I told you it was your sort of thing.
33:42I love this.
33:45This is ridiculous.
33:46What's the special thing?
33:48I love you.
33:50OK, I found the end of the sticky tape.
33:52One.
33:52That's one.
33:53Put on the galoshes.
33:55Oh, dear.
33:56This is a mistake.
33:57Ah!
33:59Ah!
34:01Get it, get it, get it!
34:03Be whispered to by a man on the phone.
34:05Right.
34:06My husband never answers the phone.
34:07We're actually in the middle of an argument because he doesn't answer the phone.
34:10Hello?
34:11Chris?
34:12I need you to whisper to me on the phone.
34:14Yes.
34:15I can whisper to you.
34:16Two.
34:16Bye!
34:17Whisper, er, what you add for breakfast.
34:20All right, thanks very much.
34:23Go, go, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.
34:24I'll put my number...
34:25Fine.
34:25...into yours.
34:29What do you want me to whisper?
34:30Hello.
34:31I'm a big fan...
34:33...of you.
34:34I'm a big fan of you.
34:37Done.
34:38Put on the galoshes.
34:40Put on the galoshes.
34:40We shouted out by a woman on the phone.
34:42Where's my mother?
34:43Come on, Mum.
34:45Hiya, Mum!
34:46Can you just very quickly just shout out what you had for breakfast?
34:49Shout at me down the phone!
34:50I'll shout at you.
34:51One more second.
34:52Mum, you don't have to wait.
34:54Just shout out!
34:55What's it is you doing, for goodness sake?
34:59Thank you!
35:00Just a scrambled egg!
35:02Scrambled egg!
35:03Thanks, Mum.
35:04Thank you very much.
35:05Find the end of the sticky tape.
35:06Right.
35:07Oh, yeah, yeah.
35:08No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
35:09I'm good at this.
35:11Oh, you are good at that, yep.
35:12That's a sock and a pouch.
35:13What do you think a pouch is?
35:15That's a pouch.
35:15Okay, fair enough.
35:16So up the pouch.
35:17Right, I'm going to put the galoshes on first, because that's something.
35:23They're on.
35:24They're on.
35:25I'm going to do the present first.
35:27Did it say neatly?
35:28Yeah.
35:29Yeah.
35:32Dad?
35:34Could you read to me what else is on the list?
35:36Say every number between 1 and 50, except for the numbers divisible by 7, 4 and 3.
35:40Howl for 30 seconds.
35:41Ooh!
35:43Ooh!
35:46Ah!
35:46Ah!
35:47Ah!
35:47Okay.
35:47I hate maths.
35:48You've done that?
35:49And to be honest, yeah, I've done it, and I've got to sew up my pouch.
35:52Where does a galosh start and a waiter end?
35:56Where do you think the pouch is?
35:57Oh, fuck!
35:59Is it in there?
36:00Ah!
36:01Have you shouted out by a woman on the phone?
36:03My wife just rang.
36:04It's perfect timing, actually.
36:06I've sewn up that.
36:07Yeah, that counts.
36:09Sew up the pouch.
36:11Once you put a sock in it.
36:12Oh, my God!
36:13Oh, I didn't know anything that I told her.
36:16You're so clever!
36:19Ah!
36:21Ah!
36:21Ah!
36:23Ah!
36:26Ah!
36:26My wife just hung up a bit.
36:29Ah!
36:29Ah!
36:30Ah!
36:31Ah!
36:32Ah!
36:39Not bad.
36:40The first time I've seen you on this show so far,
36:43not looking like you're having the time of your life.
36:45Yeah.
36:46The threading of the needle seems to have broken you.
36:48I used the whole thing as sort of something,
36:50as some sort of way to get Alex Horne's number.
36:54I loved your mum needed a beat
36:58before she would shout at you straight away.
37:00She was in the middle of Swansea town centre.
37:03Yeah.
37:03And I was going,
37:04Mum, will you just shout down the phone?
37:06And she had to get herself together.
37:08I think it's a Welsh thing,
37:09cos my relatives are Welsh as well,
37:11and I don't think there's a lot of shouting in Wales.
37:13Cos the response to most situations is,
37:16Well, there we are.
37:17Happened.
37:18My mum took no persuading.
37:22Grambled egg!
37:23She was straight in.
37:24Didn't even need to know why.
37:27Well, look, Amy did pretty well.
37:28Amy got seven out of the ten things done.
37:30Oh, alright.
37:31Which is a lot better than Joel who got four or five,
37:34if you count the neatly wrapped presents.
37:35Oh, yes, I do count it.
37:37Oh.
37:37Cos he has to be rewarded for spending three hours
37:40threading an egg.
37:41OK, well, you've got half of the things done,
37:43but this pales next to Joanna,
37:45who got nine out of ten.
37:47I'm leg drying on my maths today.
37:49Wow!
37:50OK, time for the last ad break of the show.
37:53We're just moments away from one of the contestants
37:55winning a portrait of my head on an Asian man's body.
37:58Has this been signed off by Channel 4, Alex?
38:01Yes.
38:04We're safe.
38:05See you after the break.
38:13Hello!
38:15Hello and welcome to part four of Taskmaster
38:18and some very speedy tasking.
38:19Oh, they're quick, they're slick,
38:21and I've done a little sick.
38:22Now, the final two attempts.
38:25First, they worked on Veep together.
38:26Now it's the next step on the entertainment career ladder.
38:29Trying to find the end of some sticky tape,
38:31howling, and putting on galoshes.
38:32Yes, it's Armando and Camille!
38:34Oh, God, howl for 30 seconds.
38:37Oh!
38:4330 seconds, 30 seconds.
38:45Thank you, Camille.
38:46Lovely howling.
38:47Right, here we go.
38:48Wrap.
38:49Find the end of the sticky tape.
38:51Well, I'll make an end, and then I'll find it.
38:55That was cool.
38:56See, every number between one and 50,
38:58except for the numbers that are seven, four, three.
39:00So, one, two, five, ten.
39:05I can't count and wrap.
39:07Hello, baby.
39:08Hey, Emily, I'm on camera.
39:09Can you just yell at me?
39:10I can't believe how much I love you!
39:13Yeah, I love you too, bye.
39:15Present, wrap.
39:15Well done.
39:16Yeah, there we are.
39:17Um, galoshes.
39:19You've done the special thing, by the way.
39:21Have I done the special thing?
39:22Yeah, it stopped for ten seconds.
39:24Well...
39:24Right, I'm gonna do that towards the end, I think.
39:26How do I find out what the special thing is?
39:28I guess trial and error.
39:30I've threaded the needle.
39:31Tremendous work.
39:33I neatly wrapped the present.
39:42What did I do?
39:47What did I do?
39:48What was the special thing that I did?
39:5141.
39:5243.
39:5346.
39:5547.
39:5649.
39:58How would I be whispered to by a man on the phone?
40:01Is there a number to ring?
40:02There were quite a lot of numbers you could ring.
40:05Hey, can you whisper to me?
40:08This is a good trust master.
40:10You're gonna fail.
40:11Okay, wow, it really does sound like the inside of my own head.
40:13Thank you so much.
40:14Goodbye.
40:15I'm stuck in a pouch.
40:16Pouch, pouch, pouch, pouch.
40:19Where do you think the pouch might be?
40:21Oh, it's not...
40:24Can I have you a sock?
40:27What are you looking for?
40:28I did something over here and the thing stopped.
40:30Oh, I see.
40:31Are you trying to do the special thing?
40:32Was it that?
40:33Didn't it?
40:34Right, there we go.
40:36Well, this might make life easier.
40:50You just did the special thing again.
40:51Is it death?
40:52Yeah.
40:53Touching your head.
40:54Yeah.
40:56Hello?
40:57Hey, could you shout at me?
40:58Just shout at me.
40:59Why the hell did you forget the pills this morning?
41:01You're not shouting.
41:03You've got to shout.
41:06You've got to shout.
41:08Well, too late.
41:11Goodbye.
41:13I forgot to do that.
41:19So you worked out the special thing and then didn't lose the special thing.
41:22I got engaged.
41:22I just got stuck in an argument with my wife.
41:27Who just told me I hadn't put the bins out.
41:30And had you not put the bins out?
41:31I hadn't.
41:33Interesting, your partner's declaration of love for you.
41:36Not very British, that.
41:37My wife is not here with me and when I heard her voice, I got teary-eyed.
41:41I really did.
41:42Oh, God.
41:43It's sickening.
41:46And presumably you've got someone who does the bins for you.
41:49No.
41:50She does the bins.
41:51Oh, she does the bins.
41:52Yes, so in the end, Joel, you were last.
41:55You got five out of ten, so one point.
41:57Then Armando got six out of ten, two points.
41:59Kamel and Amy both got seven out of ten, so they share four points each.
42:02The winner of the task, five points.
42:04Nine things completed was Joanna Page.
42:08Well done, Joanna.
42:09OK, everyone, please, make your way to the stage for the final task of the show!
42:20Alex, who will read the task?
42:22Kamel Nanjian is going to read the task.
42:24Here we go.
42:25Work out what word the piper is piping.
42:29You may have one guess and may only guess if you are the first to raise both your hands.
42:34First to two correct guesses wins.
42:37This is the piper.
42:38He's called Johnny Pipes.
42:39He'll pipe a word.
42:40You've got to try to work out what the word is.
42:41You have glockenspiels in front of you.
42:43You can try to recognise the notes that he's playing by playing your own glockenspiel.
42:47I am genuinely medically tone deaf.
42:49Medically?
42:51When you think you've got it right, raise both your hands and then you can say your guess when I
42:55point at you.
42:56But if you're wrong, you can't guess any more for that word.
42:58OK.
42:59Just to warn you, he's got to start with a letter E to get the pipes going.
43:04So when he's ready to spell his word, he will have his leg up and he will put it down
43:07to start the word.
43:09Joel, happy?
43:10I'm just going to warn you, I don't understand what's going on.
43:13Let's go, Johnny.
43:23OK.
43:23You've spelt the first word.
43:28It was low.
43:32Johnny can spell it again if you want it.
43:35Yes, please.
43:35Let's have the word again.
43:46BUZZER
43:48BUZZER
43:49BUZZER
43:49BUZZER
43:51BUZZER
43:52BUZZER
43:52Yes, Armando?
43:53B.
43:54It is B!
43:55Yeah!
43:57CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:58Can I just say I loved your face when Armando got a word, but your face went,
44:03It works!
44:04Yeah.
44:06LAUGHTER
44:09BUZZER
44:10OK.
44:10One to Armando, nothing to anyone else yet.
44:12OK.
44:13Ready for the next word?
44:15Leg up, Johnny.
44:18BUZZER
44:21BUZZER
44:23BUZZER
44:23BUZZER
44:23BUZZER
44:24BUZZER
44:28BUZZER
44:30BUZZER
44:30BUZZER
44:30BUZZER
44:30How are you feeling, John?
44:32I feel...
44:33It's just lovely to listen to music.
44:36LAUGHTER
44:37One to Amy, one to Armando.
44:38The words are now going to get longer.
44:41Oh, God, right.
44:42Leg up, Johnny!
44:54BUZZER
44:57BUZZER
44:57Maybe, get a bit closer to the instrument, Joel
44:59Mm-hmm.
45:01BUZZER
45:01BUZZER
45:03BUZZER
45:05Does anyone know now général BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:08But, it doesn't make a word.
45:11BUZZER
45:13It's not!
45:15It's not, faded.
45:16It clarifies that then.
45:18So, you have to have your hands on your hips, you're out of this word,
45:20Armando.
45:22BUZZER
45:23BUZZER
45:27BUZZER
45:27MUSIC
45:33If Joel gets this, I'm going to explode.
45:37Oh, I have no idea of that.
45:39Badge!
45:40Yeah!
45:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
45:49Let's go, Johnny. Leg up, Johnny.
45:51LAUGHTER
45:57MUSIC
46:03BELL
46:05What's the word, Amy?
46:06Baggage.
46:06It is baggage!
46:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:11CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:14OK, well, I'll put you down and we'll add that to the final scores.
46:17But first, a big round of applause for Johnny.
46:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:21Come down and join me.
46:23MUSIC
46:26APPLAUSE
46:27So, Greg, Joanna and Kamel didn't get any right,
46:29but they came joint fourths, so they get two points.
46:32Amanda and Joel, four points each for getting one right.
46:34But the winner of the task, five points,
46:36for her two correct answers is Amy Glethill!
46:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:41Woo-wee!
46:42Yeah, and that's enough to make her the winner of the episode
46:45with a huge 20 points!
46:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:49Amy Glethill wins!
46:51Woo-wee!
46:51Please go and collect your booty of unquestionable beauty!
46:57CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:00Here's your winner tonight, Amy Glethill!
47:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:33You're also going to be one of the winners!
Comments