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Boyzone No Matter What S01E03 (2025) [Full Movie] [Watch Free Online]Full EP - Full
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00:14You're living in a bubble, you're living in a dream.
00:19I was 18 when we started, catapulted into this superstardom.
00:24Look at us now! Look at us now!
00:27Because I loved what we did for seven years, and now it was being taken from me.
00:32Do boyzones still exist? I don't know.
00:35The world we just lived has disappeared. What is my new world? Who the fuck am I?
00:42Although nothing has been confirmed officially, it's thought Gatelyn...
00:45Everything had changed. Everything had changed.
00:48I should have gone back. I know that I should have gone back.
00:53To get those years would have been everything.
01:03I need to know that I can understand.
01:06You might think of the way that I had to plan.
01:10You wouldn't beheaded...
01:12You wouldn't be Предed.
01:12You wouldn't be a great guy, you wouldn't be a man...
01:16It's a man...
01:17Boyzone is over forever...
01:19Forever by Paul Martin, yeah, fucking hell.
01:24Just reading what he told me, I mean, that is just,
01:27this really sums up how pissed off Shane was with Ronan.
01:33Honestly, all you had to do was talk to me about how you feel about Ronan and off he went.
01:39I was angry at Ro for years and I found myself in this dark world.
01:45It didn't take a lot to upset me
01:47and it would come out in any environment, any space, live TV, to concerts, to interviews.
01:54Do you get upset that they keep saying nasty things about him?
01:57No, you know what, so be it.
02:00We're all getting on with our lives.
02:02Employees on, I don't think are going to get back together pretty much
02:04and if the guys want to get back together, you know, wish them the best, I hope they do well.
02:08We had decided to take a year off and then get back together.
02:14But one year later, I couldn't see it happening.
02:17What did you all take before you came?
02:29I was getting plenty of work, but it just wasn't fulfilling my dreams, I suppose, my goals.
02:37I really wanted to perform.
02:38I had to get out, I had to find something, I had to find something that gave me a bit
02:44of hope in life.
02:49Growing up, cars are in my life.
02:52My dad working as a car mechanic, me lying under any car, under any bonnet, it's who I am.
03:02I was blessed with an opportunity to drive in a show called Autosport Show.
03:07Autosport Show, the best in the world were there, and this dickhead, I came toward in that race.
03:16And from there, I got signed to Ford Motorsport.
03:20When you stand on stage, that energy that you got, I got that from cars.
03:27In boys' owner, I lacked purpose in my own mind.
03:30All of a sudden now, shit, this is your time to shine.
03:39Here she is, my one and only, Shelley Unwin.
03:42Shelley, this is my mate, Clarence McCarthy.
03:43Shelley, good to meet you.
03:45Yeah, as well.
03:46Out of the blue, I got a phone call from Coronation Street.
03:51Out of my comfort zone, to say the least, but nevertheless, I gave it my best shot.
03:57I went into Corrie for two or three episodes, I ended up staying on and off for ten years.
04:01And drinks over.
04:03Coronation Street gave me an identity, it gave me belief in myself, it gave me confidence.
04:08All of a sudden, I was somebody.
04:10That was Keith Duffy, it wasn't the big one in the back with the broken teeth.
04:15Now, did you watch your pal?
04:16Keith, yeah, I did, yeah.
04:18I thought it was fantastic.
04:19And do you all still keep in touch?
04:21I haven't spoke to Rowan in a while, or Mikey.
04:23Just that you're all so busy, you know, doing your own thing, you know, it's quite hard.
04:27Yeah, I'd always make time for boys on.
04:31After my solo album, it was very, very difficult, more difficult than I thought it was going
04:36to be.
04:37You know, quit for about a year, came back and done some theatre.
04:42I loved doing that, but I just felt it really difficult being on my own.
04:47And, you know, being with four guys who you consider your brothers, and then just kind
04:52of not seeing them for a long time.
04:55None compares to being with the lads.
05:06It was unbelievable there in the noughties.
05:09Madness.
05:12My manager, Louis, at the time, was saying, record company are pushing you, you've got
05:15to make the album, you know, we need the album made.
05:19I was very hungry, and I wanted to be great, and I wanted to have my opportunities, so I
05:23kept going.
05:25But it was quantity over quality.
05:29I had loads of ideas for him.
05:31As a big, middle-of-the-road artist.
05:34He appeals to older women and stuff.
05:36And there's nobody better.
05:38That was his market, that was his lane.
05:40He just got it wrong.
05:43He just made the wrong choices.
05:47He didn't even know where the fuck I was.
05:49I opened in Sydney to 10,000 people.
05:51He didn't know I was on tour.
05:54Get ready for another TV phenomenon.
05:56Popstar's The Rivals is coming in autumn.
05:59Well, it's good, it's good.
06:00We are going to get good singers at the end of the day.
06:03Louis became a TV personality.
06:06He was given that chance, because he was the manager of Boyzone.
06:10And that obviously gave Louis an opportunity.
06:12But that took a lot of his time.
06:15I was on the phone to Ronin all the time.
06:17I talked to him every day.
06:19And he always wanted more.
06:21Things start to fall into place and you realise.
06:25Louis is not a great manager.
06:27I gave him multiple opportunities to fix the problems.
06:31So I went and met him and I said it to his face.
06:34He just said he didn't want to be a karaoke artist.
06:36And he wanted to record his own songs.
06:39He wanted to write his own songs.
06:40And he wanted to be a proper artist.
06:43I've got one shot in my career.
06:45And he didn't give a fuck.
06:47That shocked me.
06:48The fact that he wasn't happy with the songs.
06:51They were all hits.
06:52Hey, that's what you're in the business for.
06:55Having hits.
06:56Just fell on deaf ears.
06:58I always told him the truth.
07:00What was the truth?
07:02You lucky fucker.
07:03You know, this is great. Enjoy it.
07:06And I remember going in and saying, right, that's it.
07:10And what did you say?
07:11I said, OK.
07:13Nothing I could have done.
07:14I couldn't have changed his mind.
07:15It was a divorce.
07:20Battle lines are drawn and you did have to pick a side.
07:23I picked Louis.
07:25I knew Westlife was going to be bigger than Boyzone.
07:27It was in my own selfish interest.
07:29But you had to pick somebody.
07:30And Louis made that very clear.
07:34It's this monumental shift in the media.
07:37Just the language in the newspapers changed.
07:40And he was demeaned and diminished.
07:43I called them talentless and different things here and there in the press.
07:48He knew how to hurt me.
07:50Vicious, fucking bitchy, vicious, horrible things.
07:55He tried to ruin me and my career.
07:59Do I regret it?
08:01Yeah.
08:02A little bit.
08:03Do you think he knows that you regret it?
08:04No.
08:05He doesn't know.
08:07It was an incredible show of the strength of somebody
08:12who has the media at their fingertips.
08:13You are who you are because I made you who you are.
08:19I was with Ronan all the time, you know.
08:22I was there working with him every day.
08:25So it was just inevitable that I would just take over eventually.
08:31Mark Plunkett, thank God for Mark.
08:33I kept my sanity because of Mark.
08:36We had a great time.
08:38Lots of touring.
08:39Lots of international trips.
08:42Lots of TVs all over the world.
08:44You're mad busy because you're promoting your new album.
08:47New single album.
08:48The single's out now.
08:49This is it.
08:50But there's inevitably going to come a point where the sales dip slightly.
08:54You know, the hits weren't quite as big as they'd been.
09:00I made my third album.
09:02My fourth.
09:04And things started to slow down a little bit.
09:07He wasn't having hits.
09:11But he's not having it since I left.
09:14At all.
09:15I had done my party trick.
09:18And maybe I'd done it a few more times too much.
09:21And I needed to figure out again who I was.
09:25You know, where I was.
09:26So my compass kind of went back to...
09:30To North.
09:32To the boys.
09:412006, Gary Barlow was putting Take That back together.
09:47So I went along to see the show.
09:51All the fans noticed me.
09:53And the whole place started chanting my name and clapping.
09:57And I was like...
09:58I thought I had been completely forgotten about.
10:02So that was quite...
10:06A surprise.
10:08And then when I seen their show,
10:11I was kind of feeling the bug again, you know?
10:18We just slowly but surely got to chat again to each other
10:22and little kind of whispers here and there.
10:24You know, Stephen would definitely be the one
10:26that would be pushing it with them.
10:27This is going to be great.
10:28You know, we have to do this.
10:29And just all spiralled into kind of...
10:31I was having a meeting.
10:32Let's get into a room.
10:34That was all. That's all.
10:35It was test the water.
10:41I was worried about the boys' reaction.
10:44I hadn't seen them for years.
10:47There was resentment.
10:48Bitterness.
10:51I was shitting myself going into the room.
10:53Yeah, 100%.
10:53I was nervous as hell.
11:09You know, you could feel there was a lot of scars.
11:12People were unsure.
11:14Unsure it was going to work.
11:16Unsure they wanted to do it at all.
11:19The rage that I had with Ro.
11:21In my mind, when I saw him, I was going to fucking destroy him.
11:25I was going to abort him.
11:28Very, very, very spiky.
11:30That first moment, walking into the room again.
11:34I was fuming.
11:35And when I saw his face,
11:37I could do nothing but hug the fella.
11:39Oh, let's go in.
11:40All right, skinhead.
11:41What's happening?
11:42Let's go down.
11:43Like, I miss you.
11:45That actually gave me a good insight to
11:48it's not always as bad as you think in your mind.
11:52I would just like to apologise
11:54if anything I have said or done in the past seven years
11:56has hurt or affected anybody in a negative or unhappy fashion.
12:02I wasn't the reason the band broke up,
12:03but I was definitely the reason the band didn't get back together before now,
12:06and I apologise for that.
12:08I made choices that I'm not proud of.
12:11I left them behind.
12:15For success.
12:18I did have blinkers on.
12:20Yeah.
12:21Didn't end right.
12:22We need to do it right.
12:25I asked him if he thought there was any scope for the band getting back together.
12:29Things haven't always been as good as they are tonight.
12:32It was great going in so successful as an actor,
12:35but every now and again you'd get a surge of memories.
12:38The audience being blown away.
12:43And you go, wow, I'd love just one more chance.
12:46Maybe this could work now if we're all really on the same page.
12:50You know, it was there for the taking.
12:53Personally, you know what I mean?
12:54I'd like to do a little something.
12:56I really fucking missed all of you.
12:59I mean, I think it's just amazing being here.
13:00I mean, it's back.
13:02It excited me.
13:04You know?
13:05I think everyone was kind of,
13:07let's do it, let's do a tour.
13:09Let's get to see if people are bothered with Boyzone anymore.
13:22Admission sequence start.
13:24Bye, Charlotte.
13:29Who's idea were those fucking outfits?
13:41Oh, my God.
13:43Our first performance in eight years.
13:46We're climbing underneath the stage to go on these trapdoors
13:49to be sprung loaded onto stage.
13:53I'm so nervous going up in that lift
13:55and kind of going, oh, my God, I don't know where I'm going.
13:58It's like you're rubbing the headlights.
14:00You get a panic attack.
14:02You get this kind of, oh, shit.
14:05And it's amazing.
14:11I remember that excitement.
14:13How we felt in that exact moment with that countdown.
14:17You can feel the breath.
14:19You can feel the energy from the crowd.
14:21And you cannot imagine what that's like.
14:23It's unreal.
14:34Oh, man, that gives me goosebumps.
14:48I couldn't hear the first two songs, to be honest,
14:50because the crowd was so loud.
14:54I'm not there for glory.
14:56I'm there to go.
14:57Look at all you people.
14:59And look at the joy that we can bring you.
15:02Why'd it take me so long just to find
15:06What the man that was there all along
15:12We designed a moment.
15:13Everybody would get their own little moment.
15:15And I think that's why it felt so different.
15:19I felt a part of the band for the first time.
15:27That my efforts were being appreciated.
15:32That we could now really be a band.
15:37We'd fill each other's spaces.
15:39Without even thinking about it.
15:40Without even looking at each other.
15:42If Shane was out far right,
15:44you know, I'd see him starting to move in.
15:46If Mikey was in the middle,
15:47he'd move over to fill my space
15:49and you'd just fill each other's voids.
15:53And it's a real art.
15:57We were back.
15:58We were back.
15:59We were back.
16:00I just felt, you know, unbelievable.
16:03That was pretty magic then.
16:06Getting the band back together.
16:12That reunion tour was huge.
16:14You know, multiple nights in arenas.
16:17Then when they got back together,
16:18they asked me to take over the managing.
16:20I was glad to be involved.
16:22I've been there since day one in the UK.
16:26And, you know,
16:27I didn't want anyone else
16:27to carry on writing those chapters.
16:30See, we're the vocal harmony group we are.
16:33We're not a boy band, right?
16:34The plan was then to, you know,
16:36work on a new album.
16:37Everyone was in a great place.
16:41We, as a collective now,
16:43had more control over the music.
16:45For the first time,
16:46I was enjoying the music
16:48that Boyzone was doing.
16:50It was 15 years to do that.
16:5507 to 09 were the best years of the band.
16:58We were the most comfortable
16:59in our own skin that we'd ever been.
17:02As soon as I get in a room
17:03and them boys,
17:03I'm the silliest fella I was back
17:05when I was 17 years old.
17:07It's just kindergarten kids.
17:09It was absolutely brilliant
17:11to be back with those fellas.
17:11Like nothing had changed.
17:14Like nothing had changed.
17:16Who farted?
17:17Who farted?
17:19Just seemed to share
17:20even more laughs
17:22than we had before.
17:24I don't know,
17:25just a better understanding
17:26of each other.
17:27You've got to get this right.
17:28Go on, go on.
17:29Some people really came in
17:30through Rome,
17:31Stephen in particular.
17:35It was the best version of him
17:36I'd ever seen.
17:37The other guys have got girls
17:39to dance with.
17:39You've got a bloke.
17:40Yeah.
17:41I don't have to be true to myself
17:42and that's how it turned out
17:43and I think it works beautifully
17:45with the song.
17:46He was looking great.
17:48He had a book going.
17:49He had met someone new.
17:51Andy.
17:52They were just in love
17:53and got married.
17:56Very happy.
17:57Everything was going as planned.
17:59Presumably you're going to be
18:00working on new music together.
18:01The first single is a brand new song.
18:02And you have it already?
18:03Yeah, well we think so.
18:05We had done the better tour.
18:06We had new songs for a new album
18:08and that brother album
18:09is our finest hour.
18:11Everybody was really, really happy
18:13and in a good place.
18:14It's a blessing.
18:15Be given a second chance.
18:17And I'm loving every minute of it.
18:31My phone rang.
18:33It was a solicitor by the name of Gerald Keane
18:37who Boyzone had used in the 90s.
18:40The phone rang.
18:41Picked it up.
18:43And Gerald Keane says to me,
18:45I...
18:49I'm sorry, I'm sorry to tell you.
18:55But Stephen has passed away.
18:59And I said Stephen who?
19:03And er...
19:07He said Stephen Gately.
19:10The Boyzone singer Stephen Gately
19:12has died while on holiday
19:13on the Spanish island of Mallorca
19:15at the age of 33.
19:22I had to call Louie and the guys.
19:27And give them the news.
19:31It was late.
19:33We were in the bar, we were drinking.
19:34And as I left the crowd,
19:37Ro's voice came louder in my phone.
19:40He's like, Steele, Steele, he's gone.
19:42I said, what, are Stephen?
19:45He said, yeah, he said, he's gone.
19:48It just wouldn't go in.
19:51What?
19:51No, no, no, not our Stephen.
19:53And I hear him screaming.
19:56Freaking hard.
19:57You...
19:58Still hear...
20:03Can't breathe.
20:05Your legs got from under you.
20:08It would get through in little bits
20:10and then it would be complete, just, breakdown.
20:17My wall just fell apart.
20:24Numb.
20:31We tried to put a plan together.
20:33To get down to C-Steele.
20:36Our instinct was just to get together.
20:39So that force of companionship
20:42and that force of, like,
20:43OK, where are you?
20:44How can I get to you?
20:45What do you need?
20:46I couldn't tell you the journey,
20:48couldn't tell you anything.
20:49I just know we got on a fucking plane.
21:00The body of Stephen Gately was found by police officers.
21:02So far, Gately's family have made no comments.
21:04What caused Stephen Gately's death on Saturday remains unexplained.
21:08Miriam got me on a flight to Mallorca the next morning.
21:12I get out there and it is heaving.
21:18There was press everywhere.
21:20It was crazy having the boys there.
21:22They just couldn't move.
21:23It was horrible.
21:24It was horrible.
21:26The kind of cesspit of journalism
21:28that sometimes it can all descend into.
21:31Paul, what can you tell us?
21:32What's the latest?
21:33Well, Karen, there's been quite a lot of movement here at the apartment.
21:35This is the apartment just beyond me here
21:37where Stephen actually passed away.
21:39Suddenly it's immediately, like,
21:42get the story.
21:45What has happened?
21:46What has happened?
21:49Nobody really speaking in the boys' own camp officially yet,
21:52but obviously there's quite a lot of speculation behind the scenes.
21:55So then you're starting to get around the hotels
21:57and what clubs was he in and trying to put this together.
21:59He was found by police
22:01and taken here to one of the island's mortuaries.
22:03Although nothing has been confirmed officially,
22:05it's thought Gately and his partner arrived back here.
22:08You know, we had no idea what happened to him.
22:10You know, it's only what we've read and, you know, in the press and stuff.
22:15Conspiracy theories are running wild.
22:17All the reporters, they're exchanging stories.
22:19Well, I heard this and I heard that.
22:21Lots of innuendo, lots of chatter about the circumstances around his death.
22:25Some of the rubbish that was written was just horrible.
22:28The worst for me was they were saying it must have been drugs.
22:33I was, like, screaming inside because, like, I knew there was absolutely no way.
22:39It was quite incredible, the most ridiculous articles that were written.
22:45There was one in particular.
22:47Stephen's sexuality had led to his death.
22:50If he's gay, it must mean that he's got this incredibly, you know,
22:57outrageous hidden lifestyle.
23:00Oh, he'd been out on a bender and overdosed on drugs.
23:04We were hearing everything.
23:07Having known Stephen for over a decade,
23:11he was the last man to, you know, have a hedonistic lifestyle
23:15or a dangerous lifestyle.
23:17It was the first time I've ever looked at my own industry,
23:19my own world, what I'd been part of, and gone, you scumbags.
23:23My mother found two men at the end of her bed
23:28taking pictures of my parents as they woke.
23:33Basically broke into our house and went up the stairs and took pictures.
23:40With everything that was happening, I was just waiting for the autopsy report
23:45to confirm that it was something else, because I knew it was something else.
23:52Pathologists here have concluded that he did not die as a result of alcohol nor drugs.
23:58He had a heart defect that nobody knew about.
24:02And because of the heart defect, his lungs filled with fluid.
24:08We found out I have the same heart condition Stephen has.
24:13Funny how just, you know, a little tablet every day just sort of keeps that under control,
24:18and Stephen only knew.
24:21People didn't bother their arses to really read up on what happened.
24:25They just see the headlines in the newspapers and they just assume that he's overdosed.
24:31Oh, you're in that bound with that dead guy.
24:34Why did he kill himself?
24:35I've gone from naught to ten in a second at times.
24:39You want to insult my brother, I'll fucking kill you, you know.
24:42I don't care how big or strong you are.
24:44You'd have to kill me to stop me.
24:47But to hear that they were now putting, like, a name, you know, to what he died from,
24:52makes it a little bit easier just because it was just, like, you could breathe again, you know.
25:09We brought Stephen home.
25:13Margaret Stephen's mum asked us to look after the funeral arrangements.
25:22We didn't like the idea of him being alone in the church overnight.
25:28He didn't like the cold, he didn't like being alone.
25:32So we offered to stay the night with him, in the church, to keep him company.
25:42When everybody else left and there was just the five of us,
25:48there was a great sense of peace, of unity.
26:00I don't want to say sadness because, believe it or not, we actually had quite a comedic night.
26:07And the usual joking that used to go on in the very early days when everything was innocent and naive.
26:22For that night, that emerged.
26:27We put easels all around the church of pictures of Stephen.
26:31And we walked around looking at the different pictures, the different smiles, the energy in his face.
26:36And we talked to him.
26:38We knew what his part would be.
26:40We all knew it, we didn't have to say it.
26:42We could feel his voice and his energy.
26:44And we joked and we laughed and we talked about old stories.
26:48And what a thing to share with those boys and with Steele, those very last moments.
26:54We still had him, you know, in some way, we still had him.
26:58Just the five of us together.
27:00And you hold on as long as you can.
27:05Yeah, but morning came around real fast.
27:16We had a mass, a special mass prepared for Stephen.
27:20It was really only family and the lads and friends, close friends.
27:24And when we turned up at the church, there was people lined for miles and miles.
27:33There was an ocean of photographers as well, flashing away as we were going in.
27:40So I went over to the photographers and I said, you're welcome to come in.
27:44I said, everybody can come in.
27:46And they all like sort of stepped up to come in.
27:48And I said, you can leave your cameras there.
27:50And then you can come in and pay your respects.
27:54You know, because you didn't pay your respect to him when he was alive.
27:58You know, none of them came in.
28:02Yeah.
28:06We can only have so many in here in the church and I know we've so many, many people outside.
28:10So just thanks to you for coming along to share in this special day to remember Stephen.
28:17Stephen was a force to be reckoned with.
28:20A true friend full of love and friendship.
28:23He brought colour to the band and that band now simply feels black and white without him.
28:30We're gonna really miss you, brother.
28:32We love you.
28:34We always will.
28:43Carrying his coffin with the other guys.
28:47You could have heard a pain drop.
28:53And this is on a street that was the toughest part to grow up in Dublin.
29:00And the height of respect that the people showed for this boy from their neighbourhood.
29:09It broke me.
29:15The love he had was fucking gorgeous to witness.
29:20It's a rare thing.
29:21Everybody loved him.
29:24He was a true pop star.
29:26He loved life.
29:28You know, he paved the way for so many to know it was okay.
29:32I mean, my off, that's not a legacy, what is?
29:37When I think of Stephen, all I can see is him being like four years of age with his little
29:46t-shirt on with Miss Piggy on the front of it.
29:49He was very innocent and shy and just looking, looking up, wanting to give you his hand for you to
29:56just take him.
29:57Just so lovable and kind and, you know, just a lovely person.
30:16It felt better to be in each other's company than not to be.
30:33We decided that maybe, you know, the right thing to do in Stephen's memory is to keep going.
30:42Shouldn't have.
30:45The dynamic changed what it felt like to be in the band.
30:49Sometimes it was hard just to do the gig.
30:52The three fellas and one missing.
30:56The void was massive.
30:58And it made you feel so self-conscious.
31:00It made you feel like we were shit.
31:02It made you feel that we weren't, the audience just wasn't buying us anymore, you know?
31:10We went on and off over the years that followed.
31:14Ten years.
31:16Couple of tours.
31:19Never felt the same.
31:21For me, it wasn't until he was gone that I realised how much he was the glue that kept a
31:27lot of the band together.
31:31Whilst Boysen was still being successful, still selling a lot of tickets, still touring all over the world.
31:37To me, it felt as if it was time to take a break.
31:42But rather than splitting up and falling out, announce the farewell tour.
31:48I'm not saying anything's flagging anything, but I'm just staying.
31:53It got more and more intense.
31:57And relationships broke down within the band.
32:01I spotted arrogance.
32:03The growth of ego.
32:07It just became hard work.
32:11People started just behaving fucking badly.
32:17And when that happens, something's going to give.
32:22It came to a head in 2019.
32:29I saw it all.
32:30I was ready to get the fuck out of there.
32:33It's when the band imploded.
32:40I'm always ready, Boris.
32:42You know what I mean?
32:44I'm always ready, Boris.
32:542019 was a tough tour.
32:56We went everywhere.
33:00I got a sense that towards the end, people were just holding on tight, enjoying the ride, having fun.
33:08When I can't.
33:11I can't, I can't.
33:13I've got to sing every day.
33:14I've got to last two hours on stage and, you know, I've got to be able to perform.
33:17And in Tokyo, I just felt the piss was being taken.
33:27If you're coming tonight, have a great time because we certainly are going to have a fantastic time.
33:32See you later.
33:33I always found going on stage a bit of a party anyway.
33:37It's everyone out there is having a great time.
33:39I needed a great time too.
33:41I mean, they had been out all day and they were drinking all day.
33:44And, yeah, it was messy.
33:50We certainly partied a little harder than we usually did.
34:03It was the end of the road.
34:08I think that they interpreted me as seeing their carry-on as infantile.
34:19And that is how I seen it.
34:22I'm sure if you talk to any one of the fans at any one of those shows, they'll tell you
34:26that they had the best night of their lives.
34:28It was the worst.
34:30It was the worst I had seen in all of our years.
34:38So I went at the mall, told them how I felt.
34:41It was a tennis match.
34:43From that guy, to that guy, to that guy.
34:45You're not pulling your weight like I'm pulling my weight.
34:48The job is always done, you know.
34:50He's done a great job.
34:52And we did our job the way we did.
34:53You know, I gave it all.
34:56At my detriment.
34:57I gave everything.
34:58To be the lead man you take on most of the work.
35:02Don't complain about us who aren't working as hard.
35:05We don't have the opportunity.
35:07It's very different.
35:09You were the dude who wanted to be in the front.
35:11So, take your fucking role and do it.
35:14It had reached a complete stage of malignancy.
35:21I had enough.
35:23The next night, there was a clash between Keith and Mikey in the dressing room.
35:27There were things that happened that were cruel.
35:33And I'm not going to express any more than that.
35:37My mother always said, if you haven't got anything nice to say, don't say anything.
35:42We left Japan, some of us not talking with each other.
35:49And yet we still had to do the final five nights in the Palladium.
36:04All the venues we played, however big the venue might have been, we always shared a dressing room.
36:10Always shared a dressing room.
36:12And when we turned up at the Palladium, our names are on different doors.
36:19We lasted 25 years flying on the same plane, in the same cars, in the same room.
36:26And the final five shows that we were ever going to do, we were going to do it on our
36:31own.
36:35We went through the motions, got through the five shows.
36:38A very, very big anti-climax.
36:40There was no hullabaloo.
36:42There was no group hug, there was no well done.
36:47There was no one from the record company walking on stage with a ten times platinum disc and saying thanks
36:52for everything.
36:54I just wanted to get out of there.
36:58Get away from that toxic environment.
37:03The realisation came that this is the end of the road.
37:07It's over.
37:21I haven't seen anybody since that night.
37:29That's when I began to understand I need to make some changes, you know.
37:42I've spent the last ten years saying yes, looking after everyone else, making sure everyone else is alright.
37:48But only now am I saying no.
37:50No, I've got to think of me.
37:54So that I can be here to watch my children grow up.
38:00For me personally, I wouldn't be able to survive in that world anymore.
38:04I had to get out.
38:06And I cannot do that to my family, go back in there.
38:11It's an addictive drug.
38:15Because I took a back seat for such a long time over my career, I feel that I still have
38:21so much left to prove to myself.
38:25It's a real head fuck.
38:28We've all moved on.
38:30I've got Westlife, you know, I've had a great career in music.
38:34So I'm happy.
38:37I wouldn't have changed anything.
38:39It wasn't perfect, but it was perfect for me.
38:44Am I done?
38:47I'm gonna go, I'm gonna run.
38:54The music and the stage and the lights, I can leave that behind.
39:00But the friendship, I think, is what it is more than anything else.
39:07As much as we had had enough of being around each other.
39:10Hello, hello.
39:14I couldn't bear to lose any of the boys.
39:16I hope you haven't been here too long.
39:18I've been here all the fucking morning.
39:19All morning.
39:19I could put his glasses on.
39:20Oh, Jason.
39:21Too close, too close.
39:24How are you?
39:25Good to see you, man.
39:25You look like Jane, Elton John.
39:27Oh man, that was mad.
39:28You're blind as a bat.
39:29I know.
39:29I have a lot of anxiety and I feel a lot of the pain.
39:34Stuff that we've all gone through.
39:37But put me together with them and that doesn't exist.
39:39Looking better as always.
39:40You too.
39:41You're lovely.
39:42Where'd you get it?
39:42I got it.
39:46Kindergarten kids.
39:50As soon as they walk in the room, it's like we've never left.
39:53No, no, here we go.
39:53Here we go.
39:54Here we go.
39:55My head's better than yours and I'm keeping it.
39:56Cheers, lads.
39:57Cheers, cheers.
39:59It's like we're frozen in time.
40:07I wish them the absolute best in their lives.
40:10I wish them nothing but happiness.
40:12I hold no grudges, no animosity, nothing.
40:20However, I don't want to go back to how I felt for many years and to see them, if it
40:34were for too long, would remind me of that.
40:38And my future is far too important to me to waste it, looking back at my past.
40:49But I wish everybody well.
40:53For me, one of the biggest regrets is that I clashed a lot with Mikey.
40:59And me and him are very, very alike.
41:01The amount of time that we didn't get on, that took its toll on me as a human being.
41:07You know what I mean?
41:07It's really sad, the time wasted, yeah.
41:09But that's, you can't get those years back.
41:11It didn't have to be that way.
41:14If we all had have had better skills at understanding each other better.
41:23We're boys and we're men and we don't talk like that.
41:27It was never in me to go, oh lads, I don't feel great today.
41:31It doesn't exist in a man's world.
41:33I wish it had.
41:35I have parked all of that emotion.
41:37But we were kids, Ro.
41:38Yeah.
41:39We were kids.
41:39I was incredibly insecure.
41:41And Ro, I think we all were.
41:43You know what I mean?
41:43Like that's, they were fundamental years of, you know, growth.
41:47Multimental.
41:48Mental.
41:49Fun.
41:50Fun, fundamental.
41:53There's nothing more therapeutic than reminiscing about the best times of your life.
41:59It reminds you of how lucky you have been.
42:02The RDS show, the first biggest show back in the RDS.
42:05I'm looking back at that.
42:06You know, the song that I used to do when I pulled my trousers off.
42:08Yeah.
42:08It's hard to fucking fathom.
42:10Do you know what I mean?
42:10Can you remember the times with Steele?
42:12Fucking catapult.
42:13Yeah.
42:14Slingshot back to the fucking 90s.
42:15I remember being in Kuala Lumpur and I didn't know if that was South America or Asia.
42:19You and I with our ghetto blaster listening to Bleeding Enya, you know, in 94, 95.
42:23Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
42:24Don't tell anyone.
42:24Hip hop, man.
42:25Hip hop.
42:25Hip hop.
42:26Hip hop.
42:27Hip hop.
42:31I am so grateful for all that I have endured and experienced, good and bad, because it's
42:39brought me to be the man I am today.
42:44Every single day I have something to do with music.
42:49Waking up with a spring in my step.
42:54The guy before I joined Boyzone was slim, healthy, fit, full of vitality, full of confidence,
43:04full of passion.
43:07That's the guy that's returning.
43:13There's a great sense of liberation.
43:24I think we'll always be what we always are.
43:29And that's brothers in arms.
43:31Oh, cheating!
43:33Cheating!
43:34Boys who grew up on the fucking north side of Dublin, that got catapulted around the
43:39world.
43:40Yep!
43:41There could have been, you know, a million other lads in Ireland that got in that band.
43:47But I don't think they would have been as fucked up as the five of us were.
43:52And that's what made us brilliant.
43:56And when you think about it, starting off playing in front of 25 people on the back of a truck
44:01to playing to 100,000 people in Hyde Park.
44:05How amazing was that?
44:07It's a hell of a ride.
44:09It's a hell of a ride.
44:11And all of the good times really do outweigh all the bad times.
44:18These boys are my boys, and I will love them forever on the day.
44:24And when we're together, Stephen Gately is alive again.
44:27And that's what's the most special part.
44:31We did have a great laugh.
44:36And it's like looking back at a picture.
44:39Saying, God, this is amazing.
44:46That's our story.
44:46It was a good one.
44:52If they came to you and asked you, shall we get back together and do a reunion show, what would
44:55you say?
44:58Wow.
44:59Wow, that's a question.
45:04Look, I'd be lying to you if I said there isn't a spark of excitement in my mind.
45:10People as far as the eye can see, and the roar of the crowd.
45:13That?
45:15Yeah, I would love to experience that again.
45:18Who wouldn't?
45:20But there's so much more going on backstage.
45:24So perhaps I'll leave well enough alone.
45:28Or, maybe.
45:30I know I said I'll never go on tour again, but they stayed there going on tour.
45:34I'm not getting left behind, you're mad.
45:36Who knows?
45:53So perhaps we don't get to go on tour again.
45:56Bye.
46:00Bye.
46:02Bye.
46:04Bye.
46:12Transcription by CastingWords
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