00:00I think we're here. Put the object on screen, Lieutenant.
00:03Aye, sir.
00:09Good news, Captain. That hostile boarding party surrendered immediately.
00:14We didn't even have to fire a single shot.
00:16The moment my security squad stepped into the hallway, they just dropped their weapons and stared.
00:22It's all about projecting tactical dominance.
00:26Hey, Bubbles. Can you get me a hypo of bicaridine?
00:31Sure. I love you.
00:34What was that?
00:35Um, I said, your shirt's blue!
00:42Is it just me, or does this channel have way too many redheads?
00:47Oh, technical.
00:48Look, it's regulation, okay? Do you really think I'd pick this outfit myself?
00:55There's only room on this planet for one oversaturated media franchise.
01:00True enough. May the best intellectual property win.
01:11Whoa.
01:30I'm not dying there. Just a few more clicks.
01:33Commander, you are going to want to see this. The biospectral analysis from the fourth planet just finished, and it
01:40is completely off the charts. We may be looking at several new multi-secular species on the northern continent alone.
01:46I'll bet we get the Z-Magnese prize for this one.
01:48Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. This is what those Federation dogs send us for the exchange program? She's
01:54smaller than a boat rat. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:57She looks like she's going to wet her diaper.
02:00Well, this boat rat just kicked your butts.
02:03Noted.
02:03I'm telling you, the captain still has it. One drink in his quarters and-
02:07Are you out of your mind? Sure, he's a legend, but he's old enough to be your grandfather. If command
02:13finds out, you're toast.
02:14C'est la vie.
02:15So, the captain gets back to the ship after shore leave, and he's wearing a t-shirt. You know what
02:21it said? Go climb a rock. I was so embarrassed.
02:26Helen.
02:26Yes, sir?
02:27What was the problem down there?
02:29He insisted we go first, sir.
02:31Said something about first seeing how it scrambled our molecules.
02:37This planet is beautiful, but I probably should have mentioned that I'm allergic to bioluminescent mushrooms.
02:45Ha! April Fools! Bet you thought that was going to hit me, didn't you?
02:53Greetings, soft biped. Have you misplaced your lower garments, or is your species simply impervious to the local flesh-eating
03:00ground beetles?
03:01The Gorn must have designed this thing. It's built like a tank.
03:09Padreed's EPS conduit is fused. That explains the seas.
03:13Please. I hate museum ships.
03:16You and your captain defied orders, absconded to Risa, and were caught in flagrante delicto after spending a week engaged
03:22in carnal passions.
03:23You have disgraced your uniform, Starfleet, and the entire Federation. Do you have anything to say for yourself?
03:28Yes. I'd do it again in a heartbeat.
03:31Back on this ship, I used to try to get you to look at my legs.
03:42Captain, look at my legs.
04:00On my planet, rest is rest. To cease using energy.
04:05To me, it is quite illogical to run up and down on green grass using energy instead of saving it.
04:11You ever get the feeling we don't belong here?
04:14Yeah, like we came here from somewhere else and were brought here against our will.
04:18And like there were others that came with us but got blinked out of existence.
04:22Oops.
04:25Landing party to bridge. You are not going to believe the scale of this place.
04:30An entire alien city? And we didn't even know it.
04:38Well, Captain, would you say our meeting like this is a violation of protocol?
04:57Good news, Captain. That hostile boarding party surrendered immediately.
05:02We didn't even have to fire a single shot.
05:04The moment my security squad stepped into the hallway, they just dropped their weapons and stared.
05:11It's all about projecting tactical dominance.
05:15Hey, Bubbles, can you get me a hypo of Bicaridine?
05:19Sure. I love you.
05:22What was that?
05:23Um, uh, I said your shirt's blue!
05:32Is it just me or does this channel have way too many redheads?
05:36Drown Mire through your pool in the melon ATT.
05:41Look, it's regulation, okay?
05:43Do you really think I'd pick this outfit myself?
05:47There's only room on this planet for one oversaturated media franchise.
05:52True enough.
05:53May the best intellectual property win.
05:57Can we assume you mean
06:00this will be
06:01a fair trial?
06:19I'm not Dinah.
06:21Just a few more clicks.
06:24Commander, you are going to want to see this.
06:26The biospectral analysis from the fourth planet just finished
06:28and it is completely off the charts.
06:31We may be looking at several new
06:33multicellular species on the northern continent
06:35alone.
06:36I'll bet we get the Z-Magnese prize for the-
06:40Is this the best
06:41the Federation has?
06:43She is smaller than a
06:45Tribble!
06:52Don't call me a Tribble!
06:53I'm telling you, the captain still has it.
06:55One drink in his quarters and-
06:56Are you out of your mind?
06:57He's a living legend, yes, but he's also old enough to be your grandfather.
07:00If command finds out, your career is o-
07:02So, the captain gets back to the ship after shore leave
07:06and he's wearing a t-shirt.
07:07You know what it said?
07:09Go climb a rock.
07:10I was so embarrassed.
07:12Helen?
07:13Yes, sir?
07:13What was the problem down there?
07:15He insisted we go first, sir.
07:17Said something about first seeing how it scrambled our molecules.
07:23This planet is beautiful, but I probably should have mentioned that
07:28I'm allergic to bioluminescent mushrooms.
07:31Attracted?
07:32I know I've felt certain feelings from him
07:34and for him.
07:36Had I been older, perhaps we could have been.
07:38But that's not the way it worked out.
07:43Ha!
07:44April fools!
07:46Bet you thought that was gonna hit me, didn't ya?
07:50Greetings, soft biped.
07:52Have you misplaced your lower garments?
07:54Or is your species simply impervious to the local flesh-eating ground beetles?
08:00The Gorn must have designed this thing.
08:02It's built like a tank.
08:08Padreed's EPS conduit is fused.
08:10That explains the seas.
08:12I hate museum ships.
08:15Back on this ship,
08:16I used to try to get you to look at my legs.
08:24Captain.
08:27Look at my legs.
08:30Look at my legs.
08:30Look at my legs.
08:32Look at my legs.
08:52Landing party to Enterprise.
08:54You are not going to believe the scale of this.
08:58Well, Captain, would you say our meeting like this is a violation of protocol?
09:16Yes, Captain, you were right.
09:19Who needs another sensor scan when we can spend a week together on Rysa?
09:24Thank you for watching, and we'll see you in the final frontier.
09:29Oh, thank God that's over.
09:32I am so tired of holding that smile.
09:36Where's the craft service table anyway?
09:38I'm so tired of playing.
09:38Anyway.
09:38I do.
Comments