00:00Enter!
00:05Excuse me, Miss Courtney?
00:07Yes?
00:08What do you want?
00:10I'm Sheikh El Hamid,
00:12and I'm interested in your English classes.
00:15Oh, well, if you don't mind me saying so,
00:16your English is fairly good.
00:18Thank you.
00:19It is comforting to know that my years at Oxford
00:21were not wasted.
00:23However,
00:26I would like my personal chauffeur
00:28to join your class.
00:29Oh, I'm afraid that is quite impossible.
00:31It is midterm, and students are not permitted
00:34to join halfway through a course.
00:36Rules are rules.
00:38I'm sure you could make an exception
00:40for a little donation of, er...
00:422,000 pounds.
00:45This isn't the Dorchester Hotelian.
00:48This is an educational establishment.
00:50You can't expect us to bend the rules
00:52just because you plonked too grand on the table.
00:54Can he, Miss Courtney?
00:55Well, of course he can!
00:59Where is your chauffeur now?
01:02Where is your chauffeur now?
01:06Will you come in now?
01:12Well, he's white!
01:14People usually are from Glasgow.
01:18Are you Scots?
01:20But of course.
01:21Well, why do you want us to teach him English?
01:24Because I can't understand a word of what he says.
01:27Right, Jock?
01:28I don't mean that.
01:30But I don't understand how you do know what I'm going to put in here, but...
01:33You understand what I'm saying?
01:34I'm sorry, Miss Courtney, but I think the whole idea is ridiculous.
01:37I am supposed to teach English to foreign students.
01:39He sounds like a foreign student.
01:42Oh, look.
01:42Wouldn't it be far simpler for you to just get another chauffeur?
01:45No, I couldn't do that.
01:46You see, Jock's father gave his life defending my father during the war.
01:51Well, I feel I owe him a living.
01:53Yeah, well, in that case, why don't you make him very happy
01:55and give him a job in your horror room or something?
01:56Don't be stupid, Mr Brown.
01:59Oh, I wonder if you'd mind waiting outside for a moment
02:02while Mr Brown and I discuss this matter privately.
02:05Not at all.
02:09The door, Mr Brown.
02:22I wonder if you would care to join me in a cup of tea in the office
02:25and then later on I'll show you round the school.
02:27How very kind of you.
02:35Miss Courtney, I'm sorry. I'm afraid I can't do it.
02:37Can't do what?
02:38Put up with our Scottish friend.
02:39He's a disruptive influence on the rest of the class.
02:41Mr Brown, I am afraid that you must.
02:44I have invited the Sheikh to meet the Board of Governors.
02:47He has promised to give us a new school hall.
02:49I don't care if he's promised to give you the Albert Hall.
02:52Forgive me, I couldn't help overhearing.
02:54Is there some sort of problem?
02:55No.
02:56Yes, I'm afraid I cannot put up any longer with this chauffeur of yours.
02:59He's rude, self-opinionated and extremely unpleasant.
03:02And you can keep your Rolls-Royce.
03:06What an extraordinary man.
03:08Hey, you better wait in the car.
03:09OK, Gaffard. Just hang about and say the motor now, eh?
03:12Great.
03:14That is a pity.
03:15I was quite looking forward to meeting your Board of Governors.
03:17And so you shall.
03:19But now that circumstances have changed.
03:21Well, circumstances may have changed,
03:23but the object of the exercise remains the same.
03:25Now, forgive me if I'm wrong,
03:27but as far as I understand it,
03:29you wish to be able to converse with your Scottish chauffeur.
03:33Yes, but I fail to see how that can be achieved now.
03:37Well, every problem has its solution.
03:39And that is?
03:39He does as I tell him.
03:41Or he gets the sack.
03:45Repeat after me.
03:47It's a braw-bricht, moon-licht, nicht, the nicht.
03:50It's a braw-bricht, moon-licht, nicht, the nicht.
03:53That is good.
03:54That is good, try and watch it.
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