- 9 hours ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:02New intimacy level unlocked.
00:00:09New skin dangerously hot is equipped.
00:00:18You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:21Maybe.
00:00:30When are you gonna tell me I hate who you are?
00:00:32You know who I really am. I'm ValleyQueen33.
00:00:35Such a dumb username.
00:00:37Oh, okay, guacamole wizard275.
00:00:39Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:42You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:43You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:45Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person.
00:00:47Or at least a photo.
00:00:50Maybe someday.
00:00:55Crap, I'm late.
00:00:57Good luck, Skylifter Queen.
00:01:01Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:09In the game of castle claimers,
00:01:11I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:14But on my first day at Edmunds Academy,
00:01:16I feel like a peasant.
00:01:19Watch it!
00:01:20This isn't public school.
00:01:23Forget your training wheels.
00:01:26At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:40Stop, stop, stop, stop the car!
00:01:44No!
00:01:46God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:49It's ruined!
00:01:56He's so hot.
00:01:57Hey!
00:01:57I told you to stop the car!
00:02:04Oh my gosh, it's cool!
00:02:05He's so hot!
00:02:10Hey!
00:02:12What is wrong with you?
00:02:13Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:16Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:18What are you with me, son?
00:02:20What are you talking about?
00:02:22Why?
00:02:24I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:26No, I'm not one of your fans!
00:02:30You just broke something that's really important to me!
00:02:32Yeah, I broke a lot of hearts, player cop.
00:02:34Okay?
00:02:37You should know that.
00:02:38I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:41You were a...
00:02:42Eh...
00:02:45Asshole!
00:02:50Alright.
00:02:51I broke something of yours.
00:02:54Sure, but...
00:02:55Hey!
00:02:56You got my attention.
00:02:59So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:07Don't do it, Haley.
00:03:10Have a good day.
00:03:13Don't do it!
00:03:15Don't do it!
00:03:21Oh, fuck!
00:03:23Now we're even.
00:03:24My laptop better not be broken.
00:03:27I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen.
00:03:33You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:37You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:39I'm going to make every classroom, every hallway, and every rumor,
00:03:45in this school, you're a personal nightmare.
00:03:48I'm going to make your life a living in hell.
00:03:51What's going on?
00:03:52Cole's fighting the new girl.
00:03:53Now Cole's leaving the new girl.
00:03:55Yeah, idiot.
00:03:56I can see that.
00:03:59Just met an unhinged person.
00:04:01Good thing the universe balances it with you.
00:04:04Same.
00:04:05Ran into a certified asshole.
00:04:07Can't wait to see you in the game tonight.
00:04:12Cole, do you need help?
00:04:13I can help you.
00:04:16The new girl poured coffee on him.
00:04:18This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael.
00:04:21But he's not your Cole.
00:04:22Shut up, Lindsey.
00:04:24He's not yet.
00:04:26Come on.
00:04:28Hi.
00:04:29I'm Jen.
00:04:30And this is Lindsey.
00:04:32Hi.
00:04:34I'm Haley.
00:04:35So nice to meet you.
00:04:36You have first day jitters?
00:04:37That's totally understandable.
00:04:39We want to make sure you feel really welcome,
00:04:40and so we'll take you to your locker.
00:04:42Come in.
00:04:44Okay.
00:04:44Let's go.
00:04:48There you go.
00:04:50Thanks so much.
00:05:12Aw, you're welcome, new girl.
00:05:14Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face.
00:05:22Guacamole wizard.
00:05:24Wow.
00:05:24What are you, catfishing some lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:28Get it back.
00:05:29Hold on.
00:05:32Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy, you should come to locker 83 right now.
00:05:36Send.
00:05:36Here.
00:05:37Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face.
00:05:42So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:45I'm your friend first, Max.
00:05:46At least check on me.
00:05:48Oh, is it the online level?
00:05:50All right, chill, please.
00:05:54No way.
00:05:56What is it?
00:05:57Oh, Belle Queen goes to the school.
00:06:04Please ignore that.
00:06:05Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:06:08Send.
00:06:12What is wrong with you?
00:06:14You messed with Cole Edmunds and you're gonna mess with me.
00:06:17Edmunds?
00:06:18What?
00:06:19You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:21Wow.
00:06:22You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:26Stop recording me!
00:06:29Jen is a new girl.
00:06:31Wait.
00:06:32Is the new girl...
00:06:34Valley Queen?
00:06:36There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen.
00:06:38Could it be...
00:06:39Jen?
00:06:42Ew.
00:06:46Your enemy is our enemy Cole.
00:06:48And I just made sure that the new girl knows that.
00:06:51No chances, Jen.
00:06:53So is it...
00:06:54She does look kinda cute.
00:07:03Please ignore that.
00:07:04Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:07:07What was I thinking?
00:07:08Of course she's not my online lover.
00:07:14Hey there, buttercup.
00:07:16Keep walking, Hayley.
00:07:17Just keep walking.
00:07:19You got a problem with shaving this morning, or...?
00:07:22My name's Hayley.
00:07:24Well, Hayley.
00:07:25I think you, uh...
00:07:27You missed the spell on your upper lip right there.
00:07:31What a coincidence!
00:07:33So did you!
00:07:34Oh, no!
00:07:35What?
00:07:38Oh, I'm sorry.
00:07:39I forgot you don't even need shaving cream.
00:07:41You're just a man-child with follicle issues.
00:07:47Whoever ends up with her must have failed an eye exam.
00:08:02I was so relieved to see you.
00:08:04Something happened.
00:08:05I lost the game.
00:08:06I thought I'd never see you again.
00:08:08I think it's time we call this what it is.
00:08:11And what is this?
00:08:13What I think it is, is...
00:08:15I want to be with you, and you want to be with me.
00:08:19As more than just friends.
00:08:22Oh, thank God.
00:08:24I honestly want that more than anything.
00:08:25You're my soul mate.
00:08:27Like, I like you so much.
00:08:28Okay, well, since we're dating now, um...
00:08:31I'm ready to send my photo.
00:08:34Wait, really?
00:08:36Yeah.
00:08:37Get ready.
00:08:43Okay.
00:08:44No face.
00:08:46Just the boobs.
00:08:47Is it a bad idea?
00:08:49But all my online friends said it's cool.
00:08:51PG-13 nudes are harmless.
00:08:53All the kids do this.
00:08:55You'll love it.
00:09:00This lighting hates me.
00:09:02Come on, Hayley.
00:09:03Confidence.
00:09:04You literally fight dragons online.
00:09:11Okay.
00:09:12Yeah.
00:09:13That's actually kind of...
00:09:18Oh my God.
00:09:20Seriously?
00:09:21Hello?
00:09:22Anyone?
00:09:24Don't look at me!
00:09:28Don't look at me!
00:09:29We're not survivable, are we?
00:09:31I don't think you're supposed to do it like that.
00:09:33Get out.
00:09:34Now!
00:09:35Fine.
00:09:37Out!
00:09:37Damn it!
00:09:42Come on.
00:10:15You're helping me.
00:10:16I won't.
00:10:17I didn't point on it, but here we are.
00:10:26Excuse you.
00:10:27These boobs are for someone else.
00:10:28I don't have a boyfriend, do we?
00:10:30That is shocking.
00:10:31Yeah, actually.
00:10:33And he'd probably kill you right now if you saw him flirting with me.
00:10:36Flirting?
00:10:36Yeah, don't lie to yourself.
00:10:37I've got a girlfriend too.
00:10:38My thoughts and prayers to her.
00:10:40Funny.
00:10:41Okay, well, can we just pretend this didn't happen and go our separate ways?
00:10:46Fine by me.
00:10:49Oh, no.
00:10:51I love the purple bra, by the way.
00:10:54I like it in a weird way.
00:10:55I mean, not even my type, but, you know, power theory, or whatever.
00:10:59Could you just get out of here?
00:11:09Hopefully, guacamole wizard will like it too.
00:11:12Jen, red alert.
00:11:14Colm and the new girl are for sure flirting.
00:11:17I think it's time to take drastic action.
00:11:21Don't be a coward.
00:11:22Just send it.
00:11:23Jen.
00:11:28Oh, my God.
00:11:30Here goes nothing.
00:11:38Still no response?
00:11:40Don't freak out.
00:11:41He's probably just busy.
00:11:45Give it back.
00:11:46Why?
00:11:47You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:50Oh, this is actually a really good photo.
00:11:52Honestly, it's so good that I think the whole school should see it.
00:11:55Hmm.
00:11:56Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:11:57Mm-hmm.
00:11:58Got it.
00:12:01What are you doing?
00:12:12Oh, my God.
00:12:15Oh, my God.
00:12:16Oh, my God.
00:12:24Oh, my God.
00:12:29Oh, my God.
00:12:30Oh, my God.
00:12:31What's going on?
00:12:31Dude, your enemies nude just got put up on the big screen.
00:12:34What?
00:12:34Yeah.
00:12:34Ha ha ha!
00:12:38Ha ha ha ha!
00:12:41Ha ha ha ha ha!
00:12:43Ha ha ha ha!
00:12:45Ha ha ha ha!
00:12:46Ha ha ha ha ha!
00:12:49Come on!
00:12:50Let's see if these boobs are photoshopped!
00:12:52Ha ha ha ha!
00:12:54Stop! Delete it! Please! Delete it!
00:12:57TRIP STRIP STRIP STRIP STRIP STRIP STRIP STRIP!
00:13:01...strips...
00:13:03...strips...
00:13:08Oh, my brave knight.
00:13:09I wish you were here with me right now.
00:13:16Oh, my God.
00:13:18Oh, cool.
00:13:19Your enemy's kind of hot.
00:13:21Since you're so into slutty photos,
00:13:23why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:28Jen, no.
00:13:29No, no, no, no, no.
00:13:30Jen, stop!
00:13:31Come on.
00:13:49My school enemy's my ally girlfriend?
00:13:55Stop it!
00:13:57Oh, my God.
00:13:59Oh, my God.
00:14:06Hey, you okay?
00:14:10Give that to me.
00:14:18Now give the phone back, Jen.
00:14:20What the hell, Cole? I thought you'd be happy.
00:14:28How does it feel being exposed to the whole school?
00:14:30Not good, huh?
00:14:31Now, if you don't delete it off your phone,
00:14:33I'm exposed to what else is fake about you.
00:14:35And I know it's not just your purse.
00:14:38Why are you even defending her?
00:14:39She's the loser who has nude photos for random men.
00:14:43Nama's got more personality than all of you combined.
00:14:46And if you mess with her, you mess with me.
00:14:48You hear me?
00:14:53Haley, are you?
00:14:54Cole is on my side now?
00:14:56Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:14:58I just need to be alone.
00:14:59All right.
00:15:00Haley!
00:15:05Cole is a rich asshole.
00:15:07And he said we were enemies.
00:15:09But why did I get butterflies when he looked at me today?
00:15:15Don't stay up too late, honey.
00:15:17Love you, Mom.
00:15:19Wait, Mom.
00:15:24Do people change?
00:15:27Like, can a spoiled brat somehow become nice?
00:15:34Well, maybe just give them a second chance.
00:15:54What's up there, huh?
00:15:55There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:15:58They're my favorite.
00:16:00Noted.
00:16:00Is that all?
00:16:01The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag.
00:16:04I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family and keep my scholarship.
00:16:08Oh.
00:16:09I'm really proud of you.
00:16:11And then there's this guy.
00:16:13He has this vendetta against me, but at the same time, he's super contradictory.
00:16:17It's so confusing.
00:16:18Sounds like you're into this guy.
00:16:21Sounds like you're into this guy.
00:16:22No, I'm not into this guy.
00:16:24I like you.
00:16:25Only you.
00:16:31I really liked your photo, by the way.
00:16:34You did?
00:16:34Are you going to reciprocate?
00:16:36I was thinking it would be better if we met in person.
00:16:38That sounds amazing.
00:16:40When?
00:16:40When?
00:16:41After school.
00:16:42At the balcony.
00:16:43I'll bring flowers.
00:16:45Deal.
00:16:54I'm about to meet my boyfriend.
00:17:05Stop thinking about Cole.
00:17:15Call me, father.
00:17:16I heard about you harassing Jen at school today.
00:17:19Defending that nobody.
00:17:21Hayley girl.
00:17:22He was not a nobody, dad.
00:17:24Are those for her?
00:17:29What the fuck?
00:17:34I know what Hayley is, Cole.
00:17:36Her mother works as a maid at my office.
00:17:39That whole family is trash.
00:17:41Stay away from her.
00:17:43And what if I say no?
00:17:44Stay away from Hayley, Cole.
00:17:46Or I'll fire her mother.
00:17:48What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable?
00:17:52I'm almost 18.
00:17:53Soon I'll have my inheritance.
00:17:54I hate to make Hayley wait, but she can't know who I am before I make sure her family is
00:18:00safe.
00:18:01You're sick.
00:18:04It's called watching out for your future.
00:18:11Oh, hi.
00:18:13I am Hayley.
00:18:15Yes.
00:18:15Mm-hmm.
00:18:16So nice to meet you.
00:18:18God.
00:18:19I'd give anything just to hear her say my name.
00:18:21But the moment she knows, I lose her forever.
00:18:26Thank you for the flowers.
00:18:28You're so nice.
00:18:33Guacamole wizard.
00:18:35Fail.
00:18:39Guacamole wizard.
00:18:40Ew.
00:18:42You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend?
00:18:45Pathetic.
00:18:46Maybe he's married.
00:18:47Or maybe he's fat.
00:18:49And maybe he's sitting on his life video.
00:18:53I don't want any more trouble.
00:18:56Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:18:58Oh, no.
00:18:59We're not here to give you any trouble.
00:19:00We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch.
00:19:02And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich.
00:19:06Eat it.
00:19:20Call me.
00:19:21So you think that you can just humiliate me in front of the entire school?
00:19:26You're a maid's daughter.
00:19:27So you can go ahead and eat trash.
00:19:30Guacamole wizard.
00:19:30Where are you?
00:19:32Oh, and by the way,
00:19:34Nicole's not going to come save you.
00:19:35Because after all, he's rich.
00:19:37Like me.
00:19:42I'm nothing like you.
00:19:47Yeah, I'm nothing like you.
00:19:50Cole again?
00:19:51Why is he always here when I need help?
00:19:54Pick it up.
00:19:56Cole, we were kidding.
00:19:57It's ketchup.
00:19:58Pick that bloody thing up.
00:20:04Take it, you're going to record this.
00:20:13Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Haley anymore?
00:20:15Don't think you have leverage here.
00:20:17So I'll tell your mom how fucked up you are.
00:20:19You're going to hold that thing next to your face
00:20:22and do what I say.
00:20:25I will leave Haley alone.
00:20:30I will leave Haley alone.
00:20:35Got it?
00:20:36Yeah.
00:20:36Let's go.
00:20:38What are you looking at?
00:20:43Got it?
00:20:44Let's go.
00:20:52Uh, thank you.
00:20:54Wow.
00:20:56Never thought I'd hear you say that.
00:21:00Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:02I just...
00:21:04I happen to see you.
00:21:06Were you waiting on someone?
00:21:08Yeah.
00:21:09My boyfriend, actually.
00:21:13Well, he...
00:21:14He kind of stood me up, so...
00:21:16Maybe you didn't do it on purpose.
00:21:20Maybe you got to do it nice to them.
00:21:22Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:26You thought we were enemies.
00:21:28I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying, though.
00:21:30Am I that annoying?
00:21:32Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers.
00:21:35Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Edna?
00:21:37Because it's not going to work.
00:21:38I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses.
00:21:46How'd that online boyfriend in your ears make you fall for her?
00:21:53He...
00:21:53He makes me feel safe.
00:21:56You wouldn't understand, though.
00:22:02You wouldn't understand better than you think.
00:22:05Cole understands me better than I think.
00:22:10I see...
00:22:11How you touch him like this.
00:22:22If you keep staring, I'm going to think you like what you see.
00:22:26No, my boyfriend has way better abs than you do.
00:22:33In the game.
00:22:35Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:43Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:49Are you that slow to the game, too?
00:22:52I can see why he likes you.
00:23:04I can't do this.
00:23:07I love my boyfriend.
00:23:08And you will never understand that.
00:23:10He's smart, and he's kind, and...
00:23:13He loves me for who I am.
00:23:16That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us.
00:23:20I wish I could just tell her right now.
00:23:22I don't know.
00:23:30Wait.
00:23:31It couldn't be.
00:23:34Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:39There's nothing.
00:23:40Cole, who are you?
00:23:44What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:46It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed.
00:23:51Champagne problems, huh?
00:23:54You live such a tough life.
00:24:00What was I thinking?
00:24:01We are from two different worlds.
00:24:03He just wants to play with me.
00:24:05But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:12Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:14I got into a car accident.
00:24:16Really?
00:24:17Are you okay?
00:24:18You have to keep me in the hospital till prom.
00:24:20He was right.
00:24:21Who?
00:24:22Nobody.
00:24:23Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:24I want to come visit you.
00:24:26No, no, you can't.
00:24:27I look miserable now.
00:24:28You need to see me inside.
00:24:30Fine, if you say so.
00:24:33So, are we going to prom together?
00:24:35Hell yeah, we are.
00:24:41Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:44Whoever needs a charity case.
00:25:02Oh, you.
00:25:03Oh, me.
00:25:04Why is she so lucky?
00:25:06Cole's never been this way with any other girl.
00:25:09People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:12I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:14Because you don't do any homework.
00:25:21You finished it?
00:25:23It's okay.
00:25:24We'll get to know each other more.
00:25:26I'm not that curious about you, actually.
00:25:27I'm curious about you, Val.
00:25:29Like, uh, how close were you with your mom?
00:25:33What is he trying to do?
00:25:35It's none of your business, but I'm very close with my mom.
00:25:38I'd kill anyone who hurts her.
00:25:42Does Cole genuinely want to know me?
00:25:54So, are you going to prom?
00:25:56Eh, I did well.
00:25:57I don't know.
00:25:58So, you have a date.
00:26:01Or shall I say victim?
00:26:03Are you jealous of me?
00:26:04Yeah.
00:26:04Me?
00:26:05Jealous?
00:26:06No.
00:26:06Why would I be jealous?
00:26:07Oh, because I think you so secretly want me.
00:26:10You are so full of yourself.
00:26:12You can do this on your own.
00:26:13Yeah.
00:26:16No way.
00:26:18It's a self-locking door.
00:26:20Really?
00:26:21Miss Corma's going to be back in an hour.
00:26:22I'm sure you'll be fine.
00:26:23I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:25No.
00:26:26Sorry.
00:26:27Am I that bad?
00:26:28I think maybe we can pick up where we left off.
00:26:31I don't know.
00:26:32I don't know.
00:26:32I don't know.
00:26:34I don't know.
00:26:34I don't know.
00:26:35I don't know.
00:26:36Yeah.
00:26:46That was my first kiss.
00:26:50My first kiss was not supposed to go like that.
00:26:53It was supposed to be special at prom and not just bumping lips.
00:27:07You're really good at this.
00:27:09Why don't you regret it?
00:27:11You know, we can do more if you want.
00:27:19Come on.
00:27:29Hey, I've been holding back a lot more than you think.
00:27:32So you want me?
00:27:36I think you know how much I want you.
00:27:42Do you want me?
00:27:45I want you.
00:27:50Oh, shit.
00:27:54Anyone in here?
00:27:58Oh, my God.
00:27:59How long have you two been in here?
00:28:00I really need to change this lock.
00:28:02Are you two okay?
00:28:04Yeah.
00:28:05Yeah, we're good.
00:28:06We're okay.
00:28:07Great.
00:28:08Nice.
00:28:15You're just going to pretend like that didn't happen?
00:28:17What didn't happen?
00:28:18Hey, wait.
00:28:19It's just hormones.
00:28:21Jake.
00:28:23Can you still play after your accident?
00:28:25Relax.
00:28:25I'm not dead.
00:28:26Wait.
00:28:27Car accident?
00:28:28Guacamole wizard?
00:28:34I gotta go.
00:28:42Guacamole wizard?
00:28:44Huh?
00:28:47Are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:49Do I know you?
00:28:51Why is he being so standoffish?
00:28:53Is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:28:55Or he heard something about Cole?
00:28:58You're crushing your soda can.
00:29:01She thinks guacamole wizard is Jake Meyers.
00:29:03She was in a real car accident.
00:29:05According to you, so is guacamole wizard.
00:29:08I don't think this anymore.
00:29:09Cole, wait.
00:29:12Oh, shit.
00:29:17What's up, Gus?
00:29:19um we were just chatting chatting about jake's grand plans to kick balls
00:29:24was there something that you wanted cole
00:29:28hey just figured i'd bring you some mozzarella sticks they're your favorite right
00:29:35how did you know that tough day huh there's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria
00:29:40they're my favorite he couldn't be cole could he
00:29:50the truth is um a dickhead
00:29:54would you honestly get out of your bro you came to my table bro and knocked my ball away
00:30:05there it goes again cole is jealous we got a problem here cole we don't have a problem
00:30:11we don't have a problem right tell cole to get my ball and we don't have a problem
00:30:17jake it would take me forever to find one of your balls
00:30:22i have the ball now can we stop measuring each other's dicks
00:30:27cole and jake are fighting over hayley maybe i can use that
00:30:34jake hey what if i told you that i have an internship opportunity for you with my dad
00:30:40wait seriously yeah just one little catch you have to pretend to like hallie roth
00:30:47all right you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports if you have any questions
00:30:52i'll be at my desk
00:30:54i thought guacamole wizard would feel more like cole but if he's really jake then maybe this was always going
00:31:01to end
00:31:02you've literally been sorry for five minutes i'm thinking about the report or about him
00:31:06why are you making it so weird about jake we literally made out of a sojourn
00:31:11maybe maybe i've known jake longer no you don't how do you know that you're going to prom with someone
00:31:16else
00:31:16stop acting like you're serious about me you have no idea
00:31:25oh my god is jake asking me to prom
00:31:41hailey someone's here to see you
00:31:54are you asking me to prom
00:31:57too cheesy
00:31:58no it's cute
00:32:01the accident the mozzarella sticks
00:32:03he is guacamole wizard
00:32:05so um what do you think you want to go to prom with me
00:32:10i i should feel happy
00:32:12but why does this feel so wrong
00:32:16hey can we not
00:32:21hey can we not
00:32:23dude seriously what is your problem
00:32:25my problem here dude is that me and my lab partner have work to do
00:32:28and you're out here to strike me with bad puns
00:32:30wow
00:32:32that is some weak shit man
00:32:34oh that's weak shit
00:32:36is this weak shit
00:32:39oh my god
00:32:47wow
00:32:48wow he's got really pretty eyes
00:32:55wait i can't
00:32:57colt put me down
00:32:58put me down
00:32:59put me down
00:33:01don't do that again
00:33:15new couple alert
00:33:18fuck off jen
00:33:19why do you hate me so much cool
00:33:20you and i
00:33:21we're not that different
00:33:22and if you'd realize and give me a chance
00:33:24i think that we would make a great match
00:33:27like say if you asked me to prom
00:33:30i might say yes
00:33:33jen
00:33:34you want to go to prom
00:33:36with me
00:33:37jen you want to go to prom
00:33:39with me
00:33:40we're both hot
00:33:41and we're both rich
00:33:42and our dads have been in business like forever
00:33:45so
00:33:46how romantic
00:33:47i think i'll pass
00:33:50you're gonna regret this col edmonds
00:33:55oh here they come
00:33:57if i message corcomoli wizard
00:33:59i wonder if jake's phone were ding
00:34:03what should we wear to prom
00:34:05and the dance list
00:34:09yeah
00:34:10yeah
00:34:11yeah
00:34:15i'll talk to you later
00:34:16i'll see your own school okay
00:34:18okay yeah i'll see you later
00:34:18bye
00:34:20he's so different
00:34:21maybe he's still recovering from the accident
00:34:26haley
00:34:36jeez
00:34:37god
00:34:43here
00:34:43i'll get it
00:34:44yeah
00:34:44i know
00:34:49oh
00:34:50you're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone
00:34:52i don't care
00:34:53i do care
00:34:56hell yeah
00:34:57i don't put a problem with jake
00:35:15i mean he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me
00:35:17he doesn't even know you
00:35:19and you do
00:35:20how do you know i like mozzarella sticks that's something i've only ever talked about
00:35:24because i pay attention to what you like
00:35:28i noticed it at lunch
00:35:30the first day
00:35:32you were watching me
00:35:35just don't go to college
00:35:36i do
00:35:50move
00:35:52colt is talking to hayley
00:35:54again
00:35:54your job is to keep them away from each other jake
00:35:58unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you
00:36:00obviously i do
00:36:01okay
00:36:01then break them up
00:36:03idiot
00:36:04uh
00:36:05what do i do
00:36:07i've got a few ideas
00:36:13hey look
00:36:16someone will take you to prom
00:36:17all right i promise
00:36:18yeah
00:36:18really like who
00:36:20i mean the whole school hates me except for jake
00:36:24and you
00:36:24but you're not asking me
00:36:28hey
00:36:28oh hey jake
00:36:30hey how um
00:36:32i just wanted to thank you again for
00:36:34the other night
00:36:37the other night
00:36:38yeah it was
00:36:40so
00:36:41sexy
00:36:43you're so sexy
00:36:44jake what are you talking about
00:36:46i hate to break it to you asshole
00:36:50but she's my prom date
00:36:57and she's a real tiger in the pet room
00:37:00oh shit
00:37:02oh shit
00:37:04come on
00:37:14oh my god
00:37:19stop
00:37:20guys stop it
00:37:21stop
00:37:22stop
00:37:23what the hell is going on over there
00:37:27shit
00:37:28it's principal stevens
00:37:29i've got to save cole
00:37:30i mean jake
00:37:31i've got to save jake
00:37:37oh my god
00:37:39principal stevens
00:37:40i'm so sorry
00:37:42hayley rock
00:37:43that's detention
00:37:45after school
00:37:46don't be late
00:38:03calm
00:38:03what are you doing here
00:38:05can we keep you company
00:38:07that's the least i could do
00:38:09if you
00:38:09saved my ass today
00:38:11the locker thing
00:38:12that was an accident
00:38:14oh sure
00:38:17so uh
00:38:18you and
00:38:19you and jake huh
00:38:21no
00:38:23he lied about that
00:38:24i don't know why though
00:38:26good
00:38:27yep
00:38:29father that asshole
00:38:30every time he looks at you
00:38:31makes me sick to my stomach
00:38:33thinking about him
00:38:34touching you
00:38:35kissing you
00:38:36i could kill him
00:38:40promise me you won't go to prom
00:38:45okay fine
00:38:46i won't
00:38:49because i want to go to prom with you
00:38:54okay everyone let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate
00:39:04oh my god i am so fed up with this
00:39:09oh my god
00:39:25sorry
00:39:26i tripped
00:39:27no no no no no no no no
00:39:29jet
00:39:29what
00:39:30it always has to be about her
00:39:32doesn't it
00:39:36they're dead
00:39:37they're both dead
00:39:38oh
00:39:40how am i gonna be able to talk to guacamole wizard
00:39:45oh
00:39:46what are you
00:39:47are you almost crying
00:39:49it's probably because you can't afford a new one
00:39:53jen
00:39:54what's going on over there
00:40:05what's going on is jen
00:40:07is getting a taste of her own medicine
00:40:09this squirman's burning
00:40:10mr edmunds
00:40:11oh please it's baking soda and water
00:40:13you're fine
00:40:14detention
00:40:14today after school
00:40:17shit
00:40:29jake hey
00:40:31oh uh sorry
00:40:32gotta get to student council
00:40:36hey you didn't even try the rice trick
00:40:39the rice trick
00:40:42yeah
00:40:44you don't know about the
00:40:47come on
00:41:00hey
00:41:00um
00:41:01emma
00:41:03it's emma
00:41:04yeah
00:41:05that's what i said
00:41:06can you hack a broken laptop
00:41:17it's gonna be okay
00:41:19we'll pour out in a few more minutes
00:41:21and it'll be like the whole thing never happened
00:41:22no it's not just the phone or the laptop
00:41:25it means
00:41:26it means i can't
00:41:28can't what
00:41:32i talked to a friend online
00:41:34he's really important to me
00:41:39and i'm sure
00:41:41you're really important to him
00:41:51you know cool
00:41:52if you look past
00:41:54all that hair gel
00:41:55and
00:41:56big ol ego
00:41:57and rich kid for bravo
00:41:59okay okay
00:42:00i get it
00:42:04you're kind of sweet
00:42:09hey look at that
00:42:12oh my god
00:42:13thank you
00:42:15oh my god
00:42:17you're a miracle worker
00:42:24oh what is taking so long
00:42:25you doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate
00:42:28shut up bella
00:42:29it's emma
00:42:30whatever
00:42:37oh my god
00:42:46morning valley whore
00:42:48how are things in the castle
00:42:55valley whore
00:42:56what are they talking about
00:43:12guacamole wizard
00:43:13when can we be together in person
00:43:16guacamole wizard
00:43:17i want you so badly
00:43:18i dream about you touching me
00:43:19oh my god
00:43:21someone hacked my castle claimers messages
00:43:23touch me guacamole wizard
00:43:26yeah hey valley whore
00:43:28show them what you really like
00:43:47here you go
00:43:49here this is for you
00:43:54oh do you like what i've done with the place
00:43:56you hacked my laptop
00:43:59oh no it wasn't me
00:44:00it was that kid ella
00:44:02but i definitely got to reap the benefits
00:44:04what kind of incel sex over a video game
00:44:07hayley
00:44:07what are you catfishing this guy
00:44:09no i'm not trying to catfish him
00:44:11hey everyone
00:44:11i think valley whore is a catfish
00:44:15because who in their right mind
00:44:17would spend their time thirsting over you
00:44:43stop it stop stop
00:44:48i thought i'd send the janitor some time
00:44:53jake
00:44:54hey
00:44:57now is the time
00:44:58tell them
00:44:59tell them what
00:45:00that you're guacamole wizard
00:45:04who's guacamole wizard
00:45:07here you go
00:45:10oh my god
00:45:11did you think that jake was your secret little online boyfriend
00:45:14oh sweetie
00:45:15i've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you
00:45:18what
00:45:19why would you do that
00:45:20oh i don't know cole
00:45:21why do you think i would do that
00:45:25jake
00:45:25is this true
00:45:26have you been pretending to like me this whole time
00:45:30sorry
00:45:31it was nothing personal
00:45:38yeah nothing personal
00:45:41oh
00:45:41oh
00:45:45oh
00:45:45oh
00:45:46oh
00:45:47all right all right all right
00:45:48enough
00:45:48what in the world is going on here
00:45:51is that a leaf blower
00:45:52that's all him
00:45:53okay well you both have detention so
00:46:01let me get this straight
00:46:02you stole a leaf blower
00:46:04and defaced school property
00:46:06it wasn't school property dad
00:46:08it was jen's cyber boy's spreadsheets
00:46:10jesus christ
00:46:11how does she always get away with this shit
00:46:13could it be because her father's running for senate call
00:46:15you think that's what it could be
00:46:17who cares
00:46:18i care
00:46:19and
00:46:20i hear she's got an eye for you
00:46:22so you're taking her to prom
00:46:24what
00:46:25i'm not over my dead body
00:46:27oh
00:46:27because you're like that hayley girl
00:46:30i'm firing her mother right now
00:46:31no no please don't
00:46:33please
00:46:34please
00:46:34then you're taking jen to prom
00:46:36max's dad called
00:46:37he said he's having a party tomorrow
00:46:39you're gonna go
00:46:40and you're gonna ask jen to prom
00:46:42end of discussion
00:46:49come on you big coward
00:46:50message him
00:46:52just do it
00:46:53just do it
00:46:56you must think i'm the biggest idiot
00:47:05i could never think that
00:47:12but i thought you were jake
00:47:13please can't you just tell me now
00:47:15i think i've had enough public humiliation
00:47:17for one lifetime
00:47:22i heard that guy max is throwing a party tomorrow
00:47:24if you want
00:47:25i'll meet you there
00:47:37okay
00:47:38you got this hayley
00:47:40just take a deep breath
00:47:42you got this
00:47:43you got this
00:47:47you look beautiful
00:47:51thank you mom
00:48:10hey hayley
00:48:11i'm glad you came
00:48:13you look so pretty
00:48:14hi
00:48:14hey max
00:48:16your house is gorgeous
00:48:18i mean
00:48:18no it's just my parents blood honey
00:48:20you know they're upstairs watching the last of us right now
00:48:22they don't care about shit
00:48:23get drunk girl
00:48:41whoo
00:48:43looks like the catfish came out of the pond
00:48:45hey everyone let's give it up for valley whore
00:48:48valley whore
00:48:53jen why are you doing this what have i even done to you
00:48:55to me
00:48:56oh i'm actually concerned about our whole community
00:48:59because those little cringy messages on your castle game
00:49:02those are concerning
00:49:03actually kind of a little bit of a perv
00:49:06did you know that hayley
00:49:07she's a little pervy princess
00:49:09pervy princess
00:49:13pervy princess
00:49:14pervy princess
00:49:16pervy princess
00:49:18hey let's get pervy tonight
00:49:21leave me alone
00:49:23is there a fire
00:49:25okay we set off the alarm
00:49:38oh
00:49:41oh
00:49:59oh
00:50:00oh
00:50:00oh next well and I'm all right
00:50:17are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend
00:50:23okay cole is not him anyways we are going to the prom together no i'm not yes you are
00:50:30it's okay you can be honest about your feelings
00:50:34so you too this whole time oh my god i am such an idiot hey wait
00:50:48please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me you didn't have to
00:50:53go to the extra effort jen was doing just fine i wasn't trying to humiliate you then what were
00:50:57you trying to do i guess you obviously the white clothes were just an added bonus
00:51:03i knew i shouldn't have trusted you
00:51:06now what about guacamole was it
00:51:09what are you
00:51:18who is that
00:51:18i don't know just the devil
00:51:23get in the car
00:51:26i'm not going to ask you again cole get in the car
00:51:29can you just act normal for once and please introduce yourself to
00:51:32haley i already assumed that's who this was
00:51:36i'm a servant so you're the scholarship trash that's hell bent on ruining cole's life well
00:51:43i've got news for you young lady my son is going to marry a good girl from a respectable family
00:51:50haley and that's not you you will be forgotten you're a maid's daughter and your mom works for me stay
00:51:57away from him or i swear to god your mother is fire
00:52:03dad stop don't you touch my family i'll stay away
00:52:09come on you don't mean that
00:52:12i hate everything you stand for i hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of what you
00:52:19think a good person looks like i hate everything about you i hate all of it i don't want any
00:52:26part of it so cole go with your dad
00:52:40no laptop and no phone for a week ever since mom died you've turned into this co-patriarch
00:52:46haley not that's real love why do you have to make me so miserable
00:52:49i promised your mother i would make you a success son even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:03hi haley i'm emma i know you are right i just felt kind of bad that i accidentally helped
00:53:10and ruin your life so i wanted to return your laptop to you good as new
00:53:19oh wow thanks emma okay bye
00:53:28one down one to go
00:53:31you're so cool i know emma
00:53:34wanna go to prom
00:53:35why not
00:53:37let's get these lovers together
00:53:44hi mr edmund hi max and max's friend sorry we weren't expecting you cole's grounded
00:53:51oh he is but it was his 18th birthday today what can i say max actions have consequences
00:54:00birthday or no cole is grounded well that really sucks because he's uh also the president of the
00:54:07prom committee we were supposed to review budgets today cole my son cole reviewing budgets he's never
00:54:16reviewed a budget a day in his life well mr edmunds today could be that day and we just have
00:54:20to give
00:54:20him back this school sanctioned laptop so we can get back to his very important and very respectable
00:54:25budgetary work
00:54:35go away
00:54:40max what what are you guys doing here happy birthday cole i brought you my laptop and logged into your
00:54:46castle
00:54:46claimers account just get it back to me by tomorrow what what's going on dude it's your 18th birthday
00:54:53you can tell hayley who you are now you can be together just log into this stupid game and tell
00:54:57the girl who you love who you really are
00:55:01no i'll tell her myself stick me in your car
00:55:11welcome all the wizard
00:55:14mom i'm fine i just need some time alone
00:55:24open the door
00:55:26open the door
00:55:27wait what
00:55:28he's here
00:55:36it's you
00:55:39i should have given you this to you a long time
00:55:41ago
00:55:43hayley i've wanted to tell you who i was from the very beginning
00:55:46my dad threatened to follow your mom and i had to wait a really long time
00:55:50to tell you who i was
00:55:51i got my inheritance
00:55:53and i can protect you and your family and so you don't have to choose
00:56:08thanks
00:56:08hey we are
00:56:10i understand if this changes things
00:56:13if you don't love me the way you
00:56:16you love guacamole wizard but i
00:56:19i need you to know i love you
00:56:32cool i love you
00:56:34you do
00:56:36yes you idiot
00:56:38i've loved you for months
00:56:39i mean this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though
00:56:43because i had to be loyal to him and
00:56:46but you're him
00:56:48you didn't expect her
00:56:50i mean i
00:56:52i always hoped it was you
00:56:58you were always there for me
00:57:04you're hurt and
00:57:06you're really fucking hurt
00:57:11hey uh
00:57:12one of those things i said we could do
00:57:16here we go
00:57:17yeah
00:57:21take my clothes off
00:57:22i'm getting there don't worry
00:57:23hm
00:57:24hm
00:57:26I'm so be on you
00:57:28Just be on me
00:57:31So be on you
00:57:34Just be on me
00:57:45Okay, so what do you think?
00:57:4810 out of 10
00:57:49Yeah, what do again?
00:57:52I'll get sex with sex with me specifically
00:57:54I've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:57:58Alright, that's fair
00:57:59I'll take that as a one
00:58:07What is my life now?
00:58:09Am I being nice to Cole Edmonds?
00:58:11Oh god, now I fully expect you to
00:58:14Continue to berate me endlessly
00:58:17Now I'll just
00:58:18I'll just lust behind it
00:58:20There's always been lust behind it
00:58:21I'll take it a minute now
00:58:23Stop it
00:58:26Um
00:58:28Say
00:58:29Is it promenade?
00:58:31I think you know if it's promenade
00:58:33I don't know
00:58:35But the real question is
00:58:37Do you got a date?
00:58:40Cole, are you asking me to prom?
00:58:42I would have asked you earlier
00:58:44But Jay kind of gave me to the show
00:58:46Oh god, please don't mention his name again
00:58:48I don't want to hear it
00:58:49Yeah, you don't have to ask me twice
00:58:51But I don't even have a dress
00:58:54Later
00:58:59I just slept with Cole Edmonds
00:59:01And I'm in love with Cole Edmonds
00:59:03Who would have guessed?
00:59:08I thought
00:59:09Only the best for my princess
00:59:11Where did you get that?
00:59:14I might have gotten you a dress
00:59:16On the off chance that you
00:59:19Might have wanted to go to prom with me
00:59:20And maybe had nothing to wear
00:59:24Of course I'll go to prom with you
00:59:30Mr. Edmonds
00:59:31I didn't expect you to be here
00:59:34Cole
00:59:34Are you here?
00:59:36Cole
00:59:37Are you here?
00:59:39Mr. Edmonds
00:59:40You can't just barge into my house like this
00:59:43I see you Cole
00:59:43You are in big trouble
01:00:01Hey, uh
01:00:03You almost done in there?
01:00:04You try changing into an evening gown
01:00:06In a bunch of thorny bushes
01:00:10Okay, I'm ready
01:00:22What do you think?
01:00:27My god, Haley
01:00:27You are the most beautiful thing
01:00:29I have ever seen
01:00:32Uh-uh-uh
01:00:33I just hunched over in a car mirror
01:00:35To do this lipstick
01:00:36You're not messing it up
01:00:37For at least 20 minutes
01:00:3920 more minutes
01:00:40We're in
01:00:42Deal
01:00:45Thank you all for using the prom voting site
01:00:48To cast your votes
01:00:50I hear we have a winner
01:00:53And your 2026 prom queen is
01:00:58Jen Longfellow
01:01:01Thank you
01:01:02Oh my god
01:01:04Thank you guys so much
01:01:06Seriously, this makes the world to me
01:01:08I mean, like
01:01:09Who else would win, right?
01:01:11Oh, this is just the perfect moment
01:01:17Oh my god
01:01:19That's Haley and Cole
01:01:21It was fun
01:01:23This way is your dad
01:01:24Yeah, this is fun
01:01:28Hey, uh
01:01:29Most time that's up
01:01:31No
01:01:31But
01:01:32Who cares
01:01:35Hell yeah
01:01:42I am the queen, okay
01:01:44She's just a little
01:01:45Pervy princess
01:01:46Come on
01:01:47Everyone say it with me
01:01:49Pervy princess
01:01:50Pervy princess
01:01:56Pervy princess
01:01:56Wait
01:01:58Wait, wait, wait
01:01:59What are those?
01:02:00Those are texts between me and my dad
01:02:01Make Cole Edmonds fall in love with you
01:02:05His dad's month is essential to funding my campaign
01:02:08Don't worry, daddy
01:02:10If I can't have him, no one can
01:02:13I'm gonna destroy Haley Roth's life
01:02:16Is this real?
01:02:18Jen's crazy
01:02:21Who did this?
01:02:22Who did this?
01:02:26What?
01:02:26You exploited me for a hacking job
01:02:28And didn't think I was gonna hack your phone?
01:02:30You little skit
01:02:32You know, Jen
01:02:33As the principal
01:02:35I'm supposed to remain impartial
01:02:37And above all of this petty drama
01:02:40But quite frankly
01:02:42You are the worst
01:02:44And I think it's time that you are expelled from Edmonds Academy
01:02:49You can't do that
01:02:50I'm the principal
01:02:51So, uh, yes, I can
01:03:02There was no venturing shit
01:03:04You lied to me
01:03:12Hailey, catch
01:03:19My princess finally has her crown
01:03:22Now all I need is my handsome prince
01:03:24Oh
01:03:25Yeah, no can do
01:03:26All I have to offer
01:03:28Is a lowly knight with a chip on his shoulder
01:03:31And an awesome sense of humor
01:03:33Oh, how can I refuse?
01:03:41Oh, no, that's my dad
01:03:45We are going home
01:03:46Right now
01:03:48You disobeyed me for the last time, boy
01:03:50Yeah, I'm not a boy, Dad
01:03:53You talk all the time
01:03:54About wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name
01:03:57Yet
01:03:58You can't see I've already become that man
01:04:01And it's because of Hailey
01:04:02And you can accept that
01:04:04Or I'll make my own path
01:04:05And best believe me, I can
01:04:08I'll say this
01:04:10It's the most backbone I've ever seen in you, Cole
01:04:15Joyprime
01:04:22I am so proud of you
01:04:26I can't have done it without you being by my son
01:04:29That was terrifying
01:04:31It's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before
01:04:34Well, so
01:04:35I love you, Bella Quinn
01:04:37I love you, guacamole wizard
01:04:39Oh my god, I gotta change that username
01:04:41Yeah, you do
01:04:42Okay
01:04:42Okay
01:04:45Uh'
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