- 1 day ago
Category
🦄
CreativityTranscript
00:00:02New intimacy level unlocked.
00:00:09New skin, dangerously hot, is equipped.
00:00:18You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:21Maybe.
00:00:30When are you gonna tell me who you really are?
00:00:32You know who I really am. I'm Valaqueen33.
00:00:35Such a dumb username.
00:00:37Oh, okay, guacamole wizard275. Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:42You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:43You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:45Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person. Or at least a photo.
00:00:50Maybe someday.
00:00:55Crap, I'm late.
00:00:57Good luck, scholarship queen.
00:01:01Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:09In the game of castle claimers, I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:14But on my first day at Edmunds Academy, I feel like a peasant.
00:01:19Watch it! This isn't public school.
00:01:23Forget your training wheels.
00:01:26At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:44I have my knight's special talisman.
00:01:49I have my knight's special talisman.
00:01:49It's ruined.
00:01:56He's so hot.
00:01:57Hey! I told you to stop the car!
00:02:04Oh my gosh, it's cold!
00:02:05He's so hot.
00:02:10Hey!
00:02:12What is wrong with you?
00:02:13Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:16Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:18Where are you with me, son?
00:02:20What are you talking about?
00:02:22What?
00:02:24I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:26No, I'm not one of your fans.
00:02:28No, I'm not one of your fans.
00:02:29You just broke something that's really important to me.
00:02:32Yeah, I break a lot of hearts, buttercup.
00:02:34Okay?
00:02:37You should know that.
00:02:38I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:42You were a...
00:02:42Eh...
00:02:43Eh...
00:02:44Eh...
00:02:44Asshole!
00:02:50Alright.
00:02:51I broke something of yours.
00:02:53Sure, but...
00:02:55Hey!
00:02:56You got my attention.
00:02:59So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:07Don't do it, Hayley.
00:03:10Have a good day.
00:03:13Don't do it!
00:03:21Oh, fuck!
00:03:23Now we're even.
00:03:24My laptop better not be broken!
00:03:26I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen.
00:03:33You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:37You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:39I'm going to make every classroom,
00:03:43every hallway, and every rumor
00:03:45in this school your personal nightmare.
00:03:48I'm gonna make your life a living hell.
00:03:51What's going on?
00:03:52Close fighting the new girl.
00:03:53Close leaving the new girl.
00:03:55Yeah, idiot.
00:03:56I can see that.
00:03:59Just met an unhinged person.
00:04:01Good thing the universe balances it with you.
00:04:04Same.
00:04:05Ran into a certified asshole.
00:04:07Can't wait to see you in the game tonight.
00:04:11Cole, do you need help?
00:04:13I can help you.
00:04:16The new girl poured coffee on him.
00:04:18This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael.
00:04:21But he's not your Cole.
00:04:22Shut up, Lindsay.
00:04:24He's not yet.
00:04:26Come on.
00:04:27Come on.
00:04:28Hi.
00:04:29I'm Jen.
00:04:30And this is Lindsay.
00:04:32Hi.
00:04:34I'm Haley.
00:04:35So nice to meet you.
00:04:36You have first day jitters.
00:04:37That's totally understandable.
00:04:38We want to make sure you feel really welcome.
00:04:40And so we'll take you to your locker.
00:04:42Come on.
00:04:44Okay.
00:04:44Let's go.
00:04:49There you go.
00:04:50Thanks so much.
00:05:12Aw, you're welcome, new girl.
00:05:14Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face.
00:05:22Guacamole wizard.
00:05:24Wow.
00:05:24What are you, catfishing some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:28I'm getting attacked.
00:05:30Hold on.
00:05:32Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy, you should come to Locker 83 right now.
00:05:36Send.
00:05:37Here.
00:05:37Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face.
00:05:42So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:45I'm your friend first, Max.
00:05:46At least check on me.
00:05:48Oh, is it the online logo?
00:05:50Ah, chill, please.
00:05:54No way.
00:05:56What is it?
00:05:57Oh, Belle Queen goes to the school.
00:06:04Please ignore that.
00:06:05Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:06:08Send.
00:06:12What is wrong with you?
00:06:14You messed with Cole Edmunds and you're going to mess with me.
00:06:17Edmunds?
00:06:18What?
00:06:19You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:21Wow.
00:06:22You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:26Stop recording me!
00:06:29Jen is the new girl.
00:06:31Jen is the new girl.
00:06:32Is the new girl Valley Queen?
00:06:36There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen.
00:06:38Could it be Jen?
00:06:42Ew.
00:06:46No.
00:06:46Your enemy is our enemy, Cole.
00:06:48And I just made sure that the new girl knows that.
00:06:51No chances, Jen.
00:06:53So is it.
00:06:54She does look kinda cute.
00:06:58No.
00:07:03Please ignore that.
00:07:04Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:07:07What was I thinking?
00:07:08Of course she's not my online lover.
00:07:14Hey there, buttercup.
00:07:15Keep walking, Haley. Just keep walking.
00:07:19You got a problem with shaving this morning, or...?
00:07:22My name's Haley.
00:07:24Wow, Haley.
00:07:25I think you, uh,
00:07:27used to spell on your upper lip right there.
00:07:31What a coincidence!
00:07:33So did you!
00:07:34Oh, no!
00:07:37Oh, I'm sorry.
00:07:39I forgot you don't even need shaving cream.
00:07:41You're just a man-child with follicle issues.
00:07:47Whoever ends up with her must have failed an eye exam.
00:08:02I was so relieved to see you.
00:08:04Something happened today,
00:08:05and I lost the game.
00:08:06I thought I'd never see you again.
00:08:08I think it's time we call this what it is.
00:08:11And what is this?
00:08:13What I think it is, is...
00:08:15I want to be with you,
00:08:17and you want to be with me.
00:08:19As more than just friends.
00:08:22Oh, thank God.
00:08:23I honestly want that more than anything.
00:08:25You're my soulmate.
00:08:27Like, I like you so much.
00:08:28Okay, well, since we're dating now,
00:08:31um, I'm ready to send my photo.
00:08:34Wait, really?
00:08:36Yeah.
00:08:37Get ready.
00:08:43Okay.
00:08:44No face.
00:08:46Just the boobs.
00:08:47Is it a bad idea?
00:08:49But all my online friends said it's cool.
00:08:51PG-13 nudes are harmless.
00:08:53All the kids do this.
00:08:55You'll love it.
00:09:00Oh, this lighting hates me.
00:09:02Come on, Hayley.
00:09:03Confidence.
00:09:04You literally fight dragons online.
00:09:11Okay.
00:09:12Yeah.
00:09:13That's actually kind of...
00:09:14Oh my God.
00:09:20Seriously?
00:09:21Hello?
00:09:22Anyone?
00:09:24Don't look at me!
00:09:28Don't look at me!
00:09:29We're trying not for viable, are we?
00:09:31I don't think you're supposed to do it like that.
00:09:33Get out.
00:09:34Now.
00:09:35Fine.
00:09:37Ow!
00:09:37Damn it!
00:09:42Come on.
00:10:15You're helping me.
00:10:16I won't.
00:10:17I didn't plan it, but here we are.
00:10:26Excuse you.
00:10:27These boobs are for someone else.
00:10:28I love boyfriend, do we?
00:10:30That is shocking.
00:10:31Yeah, actually.
00:10:33And he'd probably kill you right now if he saw you were flirting with me.
00:10:36Flirting?
00:10:36Yeah, don't lie to yourself.
00:10:37I've got a girlfriend too.
00:10:38My thoughts and prayers to her.
00:10:40Funny.
00:10:41Okay, well, can we just pretend this didn't happen and go our separate ways?
00:10:46Fine by me.
00:10:49Oh, no.
00:10:51I love the purple bra, by the way.
00:10:53I like it in a weird way.
00:10:55I mean, not even my type, but, you know, power theory or whatever.
00:10:59Would you just get out of here?
00:11:09Hopefully, guacamole wizard will like it too.
00:11:12Jen, red alert.
00:11:14Colm and the new girl are for sure flirting.
00:11:16I think it's time to take drastic action.
00:11:21Don't be a coward.
00:11:22Just send it.
00:11:23Jen.
00:11:28Oh my god.
00:11:30Here goes nothing.
00:11:38Still no response?
00:11:40Don't freak out.
00:11:41He's probably just busy.
00:11:46Give it back.
00:11:46Why?
00:11:47You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:50Oh, this is actually a really good photo.
00:11:52Honestly, it's so good that I think the whole school should see it.
00:11:55Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:11:57Mm-hmm.
00:11:58Got it.
00:12:01What are you doing?
00:12:26Oh shit!
00:12:29Oh shit!
00:12:29Oh shit!
00:12:30Yo, what's going on?
00:12:31Dude, your enemies new just got put up on the big screen.
00:12:34What?
00:12:34Yeah.
00:12:49Come on!
00:12:50Let's see if these goods are photoshopped.
00:12:54Stop. Delete it, please. Delete it.
00:12:56Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips!
00:13:03Chips! Chips! Ah!
00:13:08Oh my brave knight. I wish you were here with me right now.
00:13:16Oh my god.
00:13:18Oh, cool. Your enemy's kinda hot.
00:13:21Since you're so into slutty photos, why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:28No
00:13:47My school enemy is my ally girlfriend
00:13:57Oh my god
00:14:07You okay?
00:14:10Give that to me
00:14:18Now give the phone back, Jan
00:14:20What the hell, Cole? I thought you'd be happy
00:14:28How does it feel, being exposed to the whole school?
00:14:30Not good, huh?
00:14:31Now if you don't delete it off your phone
00:14:33I'm exposed to what else is fake about you
00:14:35And I know it's not just your purse
00:14:38Why are you even defending her?
00:14:39She's the loser who has nude photos for random men
00:14:43He's got more personality than all of you combined
00:14:45And if you mess with her, you mess with me
00:14:48You hear me?
00:14:53Haley, are you?
00:14:54Cole is on my side now?
00:14:56Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:14:58I just need to be alone
00:15:00Haley!
00:15:05Cole is a rich asshole
00:15:06And he said we were enemies
00:15:09But why did I get butterflies when he looked at me today?
00:15:14Don't stay up too late, honey
00:15:17Love you, Mom
00:15:19Wait, Mom
00:15:24Do people change?
00:15:28Like, can a spoiled brat somehow become nice?
00:15:33Well, maybe just give them a second chance
00:15:49What?
00:15:54What?
00:15:54Tough day, huh?
00:15:55There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria
00:15:57They're my favorite
00:16:00Noted
00:16:00Is that all?
00:16:01The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag
00:16:03I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family
00:16:06And keep my scholarship
00:16:08Oh
00:16:09I'm really proud of you
00:16:11And then there's this guy
00:16:12He has this vendetta against me
00:16:14But at the same time, he's super contradictory
00:16:17It's so confusing
00:16:18Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:21Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:22No, I'm not into this guy
00:16:24I like you
00:16:25Only you
00:16:32I really liked your photo, by the way
00:16:33You did?
00:16:34Are you gonna reciprocate?
00:16:35I was thinking it would be better if we met in person
00:16:38That sounds amazing
00:16:40When?
00:16:40When?
00:16:41After school
00:16:42At the balcony
00:16:43I'll bring flowers
00:16:44Deal
00:16:54I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:17:05Stop thinking about Cole
00:17:15Call me father
00:17:16I heard about you harassing Jen at school today
00:17:19Defending that nobody
00:17:21Haley girl
00:17:22He's not a nobody dad
00:17:23Are those for her?
00:17:29What the fuck?
00:17:32What the fuck?
00:17:34I know what Haley is, Cole
00:17:36Her mother works as a maid at my office
00:17:39That whole family is trash
00:17:41Stay away from her
00:17:42And what if I say no?
00:17:44Stay away from Haley, Cole
00:17:46Or I'll fire her mother
00:17:48What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable?
00:17:52I'm almost 18
00:17:53Soon I'll have my inheritance
00:17:55I hate to make Haley wait, but
00:17:56She can't know who I am before I make sure her family is safe
00:18:01You're sick
00:18:04It's called watching out for your future
00:18:11Oh hi
00:18:13I'm Haley
00:18:15Yes
00:18:16So nice to meet you
00:18:18God
00:18:19I'd give anything just to hear her say my name
00:18:21But the moment she knows
00:18:22I lose her forever
00:18:26Thank you for the flowers
00:18:28Thank you for the flowers
00:18:28You're so nice
00:18:33Guacamole wizard
00:18:35Ew
00:18:39Guacamole wizard
00:18:40Ew
00:18:42You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend
00:18:45Antibetic
00:18:46Maybe he's married
00:18:47Or maybe he's fat
00:18:49And maybe he's sitting on his life video
00:18:53I don't want any more trouble
00:18:56Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:18:58Oh no, we're not here to give you any trouble
00:19:00We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch
00:19:02And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich
00:19:05Eat it
00:19:06Eat it
00:19:16I called me
00:19:21So you think that you can just humiliate me
00:19:23In front of the entire school?
00:19:26You're a maid's daughter
00:19:27So you can go ahead and eat trash
00:19:30Guacamole wizard
00:19:30Where are you?
00:19:32Oh and by the way
00:19:33Cole's not gonna come save you
00:19:35Because after all
00:19:36He's rich
00:19:37Like me
00:19:42I'm nothing like you
00:19:47Yeah, I'm nothing like you
00:19:50Cole again?
00:19:51Why is he always here when I need help?
00:19:54Pick it up
00:19:56Cole, we were kidding
00:19:57It's ketchup
00:19:58Pick
00:19:59That bloody thing up
00:20:03I figure you're gonna record this
00:20:13Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Haley anymore?
00:20:15Don't think you have leverage here
00:20:17Cause I'll tell your mom how fucked up you are
00:20:19You wanna hold that thing next to your face
00:20:21And do what I say
00:20:25I
00:20:25Will leave Haley alone
00:20:30I will leave Haley alone
00:20:35Got it?
00:20:36Yeah
00:20:36Let's go
00:20:38What are you looking at?
00:20:43Got it?
00:20:44Let's go
00:20:52Uh, thank you
00:20:54Wow
00:20:56Never thought I'd hear you say that
00:21:00Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:02I just...
00:21:04I happen to see you
00:21:06Were you waiting at someone?
00:21:08Yeah
00:21:09Yeah
00:21:09My boyfriend actually
00:21:13Well he...
00:21:14He kinda stood me up, so...
00:21:16Maybe you didn't do it on purpose
00:21:20Maybe you gotta do it nice today
00:21:22Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:26You thought we were enemies
00:21:28I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying though, so...
00:21:31Am I that annoying?
00:21:32Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers
00:21:35Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Edna's?
00:21:37Cause it's not gonna work
00:21:38I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses
00:21:46How'd that online boyfriend in your ears make you fall for her?
00:21:53He...
00:21:53He makes me feel safe
00:21:56You wouldn't understand that though
00:22:02I understand better than you think
00:22:05Cole understands me better than I think
00:22:09Does he...
00:22:11How you touch him like this?
00:22:22If you keep staring, I'm gonna think you like what you see
00:22:26No, my...
00:22:28My boyfriend has way better abs than you do
00:22:33In the game
00:22:36Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:43Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:49Are you that slow in the game, too?
00:22:53I can see why he likes you
00:22:55Yes
00:23:04I can't do this
00:23:07I love my boyfriend
00:23:08And you will never understand that
00:23:10He's smart, and he's kind, and...
00:23:13He loves me for who I am
00:23:16That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us
00:23:20I wish I could just tell her right now
00:23:30Wait, it couldn't be
00:23:34Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:39There's nothing
00:23:40Cole, who are you?
00:23:44What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:46It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed
00:23:51Champagne problems, huh?
00:23:54You live such a tough life
00:24:00What was I thinking?
00:24:01We are from two different worlds
00:24:03He just wants to play with me
00:24:05But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:12Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:14I...
00:24:14Got into a car accident
00:24:16Really?
00:24:17Are you okay?
00:24:18You have to keep me in the hospital till prom
00:24:20He was right
00:24:21Who?
00:24:22Nobody
00:24:23Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:24I want to come visit you
00:24:25No, no, you can't
00:24:27I look miserable now
00:24:28You need to see me in style
00:24:30Fine, if you say so
00:24:33So...
00:24:33Are we going to prom together?
00:24:35Hell yeah, we are
00:24:41Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:44Whoever needs a charity case
00:25:01Oh, you
00:25:02Oh, me
00:25:04Why is she so lucky?
00:25:06Cole's never been this way with any other girl
00:25:09People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:11I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:14Because you don't do any homework
00:25:21You finished it?
00:25:23It's okay
00:25:24We'll get to know each other more
00:25:25I'm not that curious about you, actually
00:25:27I'm curious about you, though
00:25:29I'm curious about you, though
00:25:29Like, uh...
00:25:30How close were you with your mom?
00:25:33What is he trying to do?
00:25:35It's none of your business
00:25:35But I'm very close with my mom
00:25:38I'd kill anyone who hurts her
00:25:42Does Cole genuinely want to know me?
00:25:47Does Cole genuinely want to know me?
00:25:54So...
00:25:54Are you going to prom?
00:25:56Eh...
00:25:56Okay, well, I don't know
00:25:58So you have a date
00:26:01Or shall I stay a victim?
00:26:03Are you jealous of me?
00:26:04Me?
00:26:05Jealous?
00:26:06No, why would I be jealous?
00:26:07Oh, because I think you so secretly want to be
00:26:10You are so full of yourself
00:26:12You can do this on your own
00:26:13Yeah
00:26:16No way
00:26:18It's a self-locking door
00:26:19Really?
00:26:21Ms. Gorman's gonna be back in an hour
00:26:22I'm sure it'll be fine
00:26:23I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:25Okay, sorry, not that bad
00:26:28I think maybe we can pick up where we left off
00:26:31Don't worry, maybe try something new
00:26:34We're keeping our distance this time, actually
00:26:36Yeah
00:26:46That was my first kiss
00:26:50My first kiss was not supposed to go like that
00:26:52It was supposed to be special at prom
00:26:55And not just bumping lips
00:27:07You're really good at this
00:27:09Why did I want you to regret it?
00:27:11You know
00:27:13We can do more if you want
00:27:20Anyway, I've been wanting back a lot more than you think
00:27:32So you want me?
00:27:36I want you
00:27:37I think you know much I want you
00:27:42Do you want me?
00:27:45I want you
00:27:50Oh shit
00:27:54Anyone in here?
00:27:58Oh my god, how long have you two been in here?
00:28:00I really need to change this lock
00:28:02Are you two okay?
00:28:04Yeah, yeah, we're good
00:28:06I think so
00:28:07We're okay
00:28:08Nice
00:28:15You're just gonna pretend like that didn't happen?
00:28:16What didn't happen?
00:28:18What didn't happen?
00:28:18Hey, wait
00:28:19It's just hormones
00:28:21Jake
00:28:22Can you still play after your accident?
00:28:25Relax, I'm not dead
00:28:26Wait, car accident?
00:28:28Guacamole wizard?
00:28:34I gotta go
00:28:43Guacamole wizard
00:28:44Huh?
00:28:47Are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:49Do I know you?
00:28:51Why is he being so standoffish?
00:28:53Is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:28:55Or he heard something about coal?
00:28:58You're crushing your soda can
00:29:01She thinks guacamole wizard is Jake Myers
00:29:03She was in a real car accident
00:29:05And according to you so is guacamole wizard
00:29:07I can't take this anymore
00:29:09Cole, wait
00:29:12Oh shit
00:29:17What's up guys?
00:29:18Um, we were just chatting
00:29:21Chatting about Jake's grand plans to kick balls?
00:29:24Was there something that you wanted, Cole?
00:29:28Hey!
00:29:29Just figured I'd bring you some mozzarella sticks
00:29:31They're your favorite, right?
00:29:35How did you know that?
00:29:37Tough day, huh?
00:29:38There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria
00:29:40They're my favorite
00:29:42He couldn't be Cole
00:29:44Could he?
00:29:50The truth is, um
00:29:51A dickhead?
00:29:54Will you honestly get out of here, bro?
00:29:55You came to my table, bro
00:29:57And knocked my ball away
00:30:05There it goes again
00:30:06Cole is jealous
00:30:07We got a problem here, Cole?
00:30:09We don't have a problem
00:30:11We don't have a problem
00:30:13Right?
00:30:14Tell Cole to get my ball
00:30:15And we don't have a problem
00:30:17Jake, it would take me forever to find one of your balls
00:30:22I have the ball now
00:30:23Can we stop measuring each other's dicks?
00:30:27Cole and Jake are fighting over Haley?
00:30:30Maybe I can use that
00:30:34Jake!
00:30:35Hey!
00:30:36What if I told you that I have an internship opportunity for you with my dad?
00:30:40Wait, seriously?
00:30:41Yeah, just one little catch
00:30:42You have to pretend to like Hallie Roth
00:30:47All right, you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports
00:30:50If you have any questions, I'll be at my desk
00:30:54I thought guacamole wizard would feel more like Cole
00:30:57But if he's really Jake, then maybe this was always going to end
00:31:02You've literally been sorry for five minutes
00:31:03I'm thinking
00:31:04About the report or about him?
00:31:06Why are you making it so weird about Jake?
00:31:08We literally made out of a sword room
00:31:11Maybe I've known Jake longer
00:31:13No, you don't
00:31:14How do you know that?
00:31:15You're going to prom with someone else
00:31:16Stop acting like you're serious about me
00:31:18You have no idea
00:31:25Oh my god, is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:41Haley, someone's here to see you
00:31:54Are you asking me to prom?
00:31:57No
00:31:58Too cheesy?
00:31:58No, it's cute
00:32:01The accident?
00:32:02The mozzarella sticks?
00:32:03He is guacamole wizard
00:32:05So, um, what do you think?
00:32:08You want to go to prom with me?
00:32:10I...
00:32:11I should feel happy
00:32:12But why does this feel so wrong?
00:32:16Hey, can we not?
00:32:20Hey, can we not?
00:32:22Dude, seriously, what is your problem?
00:32:25My problem here, dude
00:32:26Is that me and my lab partner
00:32:27Have work to do
00:32:28And you're out here to strike me
00:32:29We're a bad pun
00:32:30Wow
00:32:32That is some weak shit, man
00:32:35That's weak shit?
00:32:36Is this weak shit?
00:32:39Oh my god
00:32:48Wow
00:32:49He's got really pretty eyes
00:32:56Wait, I can't
00:32:57Colt, put me down
00:32:58Put me down
00:32:59Put me down
00:32:59Put me down
00:33:02Don't do that again
00:33:15New couple alert?
00:33:18Fuck off, Jen
00:33:19Why do you hate me so much, Cole?
00:33:21You and I, we're not that different
00:33:23And if you'd realize and give me a chance
00:33:25I think that we would make a great match
00:33:27Like, say, if you asked me to prom
00:33:29Hmm
00:33:30I might say yes
00:33:33Jen, you wanna go to prom
00:33:35With me
00:33:37Jen, you wanna go to prom
00:33:39With me
00:33:40We're both hot
00:33:41And we're both rich
00:33:42And our dads have been in business
00:33:44Like, forever
00:33:45So
00:33:46How romantic
00:33:47I think I'll pass
00:33:50You're gonna regret this, Cole Edmonds
00:33:57If I message Corcomole Wizard
00:33:59I wonder if Jake's filming
00:34:03What should we wear to prom?
00:34:05And the Dean's List
00:34:06Wow
00:34:07Thanks for listening
00:34:09Yeah
00:34:11Yeah
00:34:11Yeah
00:34:12Yeah
00:34:15I'll talk to you later
00:34:16I'll see you around school, okay?
00:34:18Okay, yeah, I'll see you later
00:34:18Bye
00:34:20He's so different
00:34:21Maybe he's still recovering from the accident?
00:34:26Haley?
00:34:36Geez
00:34:37Geez
00:34:37God
00:34:43Here, I'll get it
00:34:44Yeah, I'll get it
00:34:49Oh
00:34:50You're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone?
00:34:52I don't care
00:34:53I do care
00:34:56Here we are
00:35:13I'll put a problem with Jake
00:35:15I mean he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me
00:35:17He doesn't even know you
00:35:19And you do?
00:35:20How do you know I like mozzarella sticks?
00:35:22That's something I've only ever talked about
00:35:24Because I pay attention to what you like
00:35:28I noticed it at lunch
00:35:30The first day
00:35:32You were watching me?
00:35:35Just don't go to college, Jake
00:35:51Melv
00:35:52Colt is talking to Hayley again
00:35:54Your job is to keep them away from each other, Jake
00:35:58Unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you
00:36:00Obviously I do
00:36:01Okay, then break them up, idiot
00:36:04Um, what do I do?
00:36:07I've got a few ideas
00:36:13Hey look, someone will take you to prom
00:36:17Alright, I promise
00:36:18Yeah?
00:36:19Really, like who?
00:36:20I mean the whole school hates me, except for Jake
00:36:24And you, but you're not asking me
00:36:28Hey
00:36:29Oh, hey, Jake
00:36:30Hey, Hal
00:36:31Um, I just wanted to thank you again for the other night
00:36:37The other night?
00:36:38Yeah, it was
00:36:41So sexy
00:36:43You're so sexy
00:36:45Jake, what are you talking about?
00:36:47I hate to break it to you, asshole
00:36:50But she's my prom date
00:36:56And she's a real tiger in the peck room
00:37:00Oh, shit
00:37:02Oh, shit
00:37:18Oh, shit
00:37:19Stop, guys, stop it
00:37:21Stop, stop
00:37:23What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:27Shit, it's Principal Stevens
00:37:29I've got to save Cole
00:37:30I mean, Jake
00:37:31I've got to save Jake
00:37:38Oh, my God
00:37:39Principal Stevens, I'm so sorry
00:37:42Hey, Lee, Rob
00:37:43That's the tension
00:37:45After school
00:37:46Don't be late
00:38:03Cole, what are you doing here?
00:38:05Can we keep you company?
00:38:07It's the least I could do
00:38:08If you saved my house today
00:38:11The locker thing
00:38:12That was an accident
00:38:14Oh, sure
00:38:17So, uh
00:38:18You and
00:38:19You and Jake, huh?
00:38:21No
00:38:23He lied about that
00:38:24I don't know why, though
00:38:26Good
00:38:27You know
00:38:29Father, the asshole
00:38:30Every time he looks at you
00:38:31Makes me sick to my stomach
00:38:33Thinking about him
00:38:34Touching you
00:38:35Kissing you
00:38:36I could kill him
00:38:40Promise me you won't go to prom
00:38:45Okay, fine
00:38:46I won't
00:38:49Because I want to go to prom with you
00:38:54Okay, everyone
00:38:55Let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate
00:39:04Oh, my God
00:39:05I am so fed up with this
00:39:25Sorry
00:39:26I tripped
00:39:27No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
00:39:29Jet
00:39:30What?
00:39:30It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:36They're dead
00:39:37They're both dead
00:39:38Oh
00:39:40How am I going to be able to talk to guacamole wizard?
00:39:45Oh
00:39:46What are you
00:39:47Are you almost crying?
00:39:49It's probably because you can't afford a new one
00:39:53Jen
00:39:53What's going on over there?
00:40:06What's going on is Jen is getting a taste of her own medicine
00:40:09This squirm is burning
00:40:10Mr. Edmonds
00:40:11Oh, please
00:40:12It's baking soda and water
00:40:13You're fine
00:40:14Detention
00:40:14Today after school
00:40:17Shit
00:40:29Jake, hey
00:40:31Oh, uh
00:40:31Sorry
00:40:32Gotta get to student council
00:40:36Hey
00:40:37You didn't even try the rice trick
00:40:39The rice trick?
00:40:42Yeah
00:40:44You don't know about the
00:40:47Come on
00:41:00Hey
00:41:00Um, Ella
00:41:03It's Emma
00:41:04Yeah, that's what I said
00:41:06Can you hack a broken laptop?
00:41:16Hey
00:41:17It's gonna be okay
00:41:19We'll pour out in a few more minutes
00:41:21And it'll be like the whole thing never happened
00:41:22No, it's not just the phone or the laptop
00:41:25It means
00:41:25It means I can't
00:41:28Can't what?
00:41:31I talked to a friend online
00:41:34He's really important to me
00:41:39And I'm sure
00:41:41You're really important to him
00:41:51You know, Cole
00:41:52If you look past
00:41:54All that hair gel
00:41:55And
00:41:56Big ol' ego
00:41:57And
00:41:58Rich kid for bravo
00:41:59Okay, okay
00:42:00I get it
00:42:04You're kinda sweet
00:42:09Hey, look at that
00:42:12Oh my god
00:42:13Thank you
00:42:15Oh my god
00:42:17You're a miracle worker
00:42:24What is taking so long?
00:42:26You doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate
00:42:28Shut up, Ella
00:42:29It's Emma
00:42:30Whatever
00:42:37Oh my god
00:42:46Morning, valley whore
00:42:48How are things in the castle?
00:42:55Valley whore?
00:42:56What are they talking about?
00:43:12Guacamole wizard
00:43:13When can we be together in person?
00:43:16Guacamole wizard
00:43:17I want you so badly
00:43:18I dream about you touching me
00:43:19Oh my god
00:43:21Someone hacked my castle claimers messages
00:43:22Touch me, guacamole wizard
00:43:26Yeah, hey valley whore
00:43:28Show them what you really like
00:43:47Here you go
00:43:49Here, this is for you
00:43:54Oh, do you like what I've done with the place?
00:43:56You hacked my laptop?
00:43:59Oh no, it wasn't me
00:44:00It was that kid, Ella
00:44:02But I definitely gotta reap the benefits
00:44:04What kind of incel
00:44:05Sex over a video game, Hayley?
00:44:07What are you, catfishing this guy?
00:44:09No, I'm not trying to catfish him
00:44:11Hey everyone
00:44:11I think valley whore's a catfish
00:44:15Because who in their right mind
00:44:17Would spend their time thirsting over you?
00:44:43Stop it! Stop! Stop!
00:44:45Stop it! Stop!
00:44:48Stop it! Stop it!
00:44:49some time. Jake! Hey! Now's the time. Tell them. Tell them what? That you're a guacamole wizard.
00:45:04Who's guacamole wizard? Here you go. Oh my god. Did you think that Jake was your secret little
00:45:13online boyfriend? Oh sweetie, I've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you.
00:45:18What? Why would you do that? Oh, I don't know, Cole. Why do you think I would do that?
00:45:25Jake, is this true? Have you been pretending to like me this whole time? Sorry. It was nothing personal.
00:45:38Yeah, nothing personal.
00:45:46All right, all right, all right. Enough. What in the world is going on here? Is that a leaf blower?
00:45:52That's all him. Okay, well you both have detention, so.
00:46:01Let me get this straight. You stole a leaf blower and defaced school property?
00:46:06It wasn't school property, dad. It was Jen's cyber boy's spreadsheets. Jesus Christ, how does she always get away with
00:46:12this
00:46:13shit? Could it be because her father's running for senate, Cole? You think that's what it could be?
00:46:17Who cares? I care. And I hear she's got an eye for you. So you're taking her to prom.
00:46:24What? I'm not overmind that body. Oh, because you're like that Haley girl?
00:46:30I'm firing her mother right now. No, no, please don't. Please.
00:46:34Then you're taking Jen to prom. Max's dad called. He said he's having a party tomorrow.
00:46:39You're going to go and you're going to ask Jen to prom. End of discussion.
00:46:49Come on, you big coward. Message him. Just do it, just do it.
00:46:56You must think I'm the biggest idiot.
00:47:05I could never think that.
00:47:12But I thought you were Jake. Please, can't you just tell me now?
00:47:15I think I've had enough public humiliation for one lifetime.
00:47:22I heard that guy, Max, is throwing a party tomorrow. If you want, I'll meet you there.
00:47:37Okay. You got this, Haley. Just take a deep breath. You got this. You got this.
00:47:47You look beautiful.
00:47:51Thank you, Mom.
00:48:10Hey, Haley. I'm glad you came. You look so pretty.
00:48:14Hi. Hey, Max. Your house is gorgeous. I mean...
00:48:18No, it's just my parents' blood, honey. You know they're upstairs watching The Last of Us right now?
00:48:22They don't care about shit. Get drunk, girl.
00:48:24Woo!
00:48:28Yeah.
00:48:38What are you doing here, valley whore?
00:48:43Looks like the catfish came out of the pond.
00:48:45Hey, everyone. Let's give it up for valley whore.
00:48:48Valley whore!
00:48:53Jen, why are you doing this? What have I even done to you?
00:48:55To me? Oh, I'm actually concerned about our whole community.
00:48:59Because those little cringy messages on your castle game, those are concerning.
00:49:04Actually, I kind of feel a bit of a perv. Did you know that, Haley?
00:49:08She's a little pervy princess.
00:49:10Pervy princess!
00:49:13Pervy princess!
00:49:14Pervy princess!
00:49:16Pervy princess!
00:49:18Hey, let's get pervy tonight.
00:49:21Leave me alone.
00:49:23What? Is there a fire?
00:49:25Okay, we set off the alarm.
00:49:39Paul?
00:49:40You should've been doing this last year.
00:49:44I found it.
00:49:49I'll let you go.
00:49:50Oh!
00:49:51Oh!
00:49:55Ooh!
00:49:56Ooh!
00:50:01Ooh!
00:50:17are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend okay cole is not
00:50:24him anyways we are going to the prom together no i'm not yes you are it's okay
00:50:31you can be honest about your feelings so you too this whole time
00:50:39oh my god i am such an idiot hey wait wait
00:50:49please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me you didn't have to
00:50:53go to the extra effort jen was doing just fine i wasn't trying to humiliate you then what were
00:50:57you trying to do i guess you obviously the white clothes were just an added bonus i knew i shouldn't
00:51:04trusted you and what about guacamole was it what do you
00:51:18who is that just the devil get in the car
00:51:26i'm not going to ask you again cole get in the car
00:51:29dad can you just act normal for once and please introduce yourself to hayley
00:51:33i already assumed that's who this was
00:51:36hi mr happens so you're the scholarship trash that's hell bent on ruining cole's life
00:51:43well i've got news for you young lady my son is going to marry a good girl
00:51:48from a respectable family and that's not you you will be forgotten you're a maid's daughter
00:51:55and your mom works for me stay away from him or i swear to god your mother is fire
00:52:03dad stop don't you touch my family i'll stay away
00:52:08oh hayley come on you don't mean that
00:52:12i hate everything you stand for i hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of
00:52:19what you think a good person looks like i hate everything about you i hate all of it
00:52:25i don't want any part of it so cole go with your dad
00:52:32hayley
00:52:40no laptop and no phone for a week ever since mom died you've turned into this cold patriarch
00:52:46hayley not that's real love why do you have to make me so miserable
00:52:49i promised your mother i would make you a success son
00:52:52even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:03hi hayley i'm emma i know you are right i just felt kind of bad that i accidentally helped
00:53:10and ruin your life so i wanted to return your laptop to you goodness new
00:53:19oh wow thanks emma okay bye
00:53:29one down one to go
00:53:31you're so cool i know emma
00:53:34want to go to prom why not
00:53:37let's get these lovers together
00:53:44hi mr edmund hi max and max's friend sorry we weren't expecting you cole's grounded
00:53:51oh he is but it was his 18th birthday today
00:53:55what can i say max actions have consequences
00:53:59birthday or no cole is grounded
00:54:02well that really sucks because he's uh also the president of the prom committee
00:54:08we were supposed to review budgets today
00:54:11cole my son cole reviewing budgets
00:54:15he's never reviewed a budget a day in his life
00:54:17well mr edmunds today could be that day
00:54:19and we just have to give him back this school sanctioned laptop
00:54:22so we can get back to his very important
00:54:24and very respectable budgetary work
00:54:35go away
00:54:40max what what are you guys doing here
00:54:42happy birthday cole
00:54:44i brought you my laptop and logged into your castle claimers account just get it back to
00:54:47me by tomorrow
00:54:49what what's going on
00:54:51dude it's your 18th birthday
00:54:53you can tell hayley who you are now you can be together
00:54:55just log into this stupid game and tell the girl who you love who you really are
00:55:00nah
00:55:01i'll tell her myself
00:55:03stick me in your car
00:55:13mom i'm fine i just need some time alone
00:55:24open the door
00:55:26wait what
00:55:28he's here
00:55:37it's you
00:55:39i should have given you this too a long time ago
00:55:43hayley i've wanted to tell you who i was from the bitter beginning
00:55:46my dad threatened to follow your mom and i had to wait a really long time
00:55:50to tell you who i was
00:55:51i got my inheritance
00:55:53and i can protect you and your family and so
00:55:55you don't have to choose
00:56:10i understand that this changes things
00:56:12if you don't love me the way you love guacamole wizard but
00:56:19i need you to know i love you
00:56:22i need you to know i love you
00:56:32cool i love you
00:56:34you do
00:56:36yes you idiot
00:56:38i've loved you for months
00:56:39i mean this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though
00:56:43because i had to be loyal to him and
00:56:46but you're him
00:56:48you didn't expect her
00:56:50i mean i
00:56:52i always hoped it was you
00:56:55until you hoped
00:56:57yes
00:56:58i hoped it was you
00:56:59you were always there for me
00:57:04you're hurt and
00:57:06you're really fucking hurt
00:57:11hey uh
00:57:12one of those things i said we could do
00:57:16you ever go
00:57:17yeah
00:57:21take my clothes off
00:57:22yeah no don't worry
00:57:45okay so
00:57:47what do you think
00:57:4810 out of 10
00:57:49yeah
00:57:50yeah
00:57:51one two again
00:57:52i'll get sex to sex with me specifically
00:57:54i've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:57:57all right
00:57:58all right that's fair
00:57:59i'll uh
00:58:01i'll take that as a win
00:58:07what is my life now
00:58:08am i being nice to cole eggnance
00:58:11oh god no
00:58:12i fully expect you to
00:58:14continue to berate me endlessly
00:58:17now i'll just
00:58:18i'll just lost behind it
00:58:20there's always been lust behind it
00:58:21i'll see you in a minute
00:58:22no
00:58:24stop it
00:58:26um
00:58:28thank you
00:58:29isn't promenade
00:58:31i think you know
00:58:32i think you know if it's prom or not
00:58:34i don't know
00:58:36but the real question is
00:58:37do you got a date
00:58:40cole are you asking me to prom
00:58:42oh i would have asked you earlier
00:58:44but jay kind of gave me to the gym
00:58:46oh god please don't mention his name again
00:58:48i don't want to hear it
00:58:49yeah you don't have to ask me twice
00:58:51but i don't even have a dress
00:58:54later
00:58:59i just slept with cole edmonds
00:59:01and i'm in love with cole edmonds
00:59:03who would have guessed
00:59:07i thought
00:59:09only the best for my princess
00:59:11where did you get that
00:59:13uh
00:59:14i might have gotten you a dress
00:59:16on the off chance that you
00:59:19might have wanted to go to prom with me
00:59:20and maybe had nothing to wear
00:59:24of course they'll go to prom with you
00:59:31mr edmonds
00:59:32i'd expect you to be here
00:59:34cole
00:59:34are you here
00:59:36cole
00:59:37are you here
00:59:40mr edmonds
00:59:40you can't just park into my house like this
00:59:43i see you cole
00:59:43you are a big pro
01:00:01hey uh
01:00:03you almost done in there
01:00:04you try changing into an evening gown
01:00:06in a bunch of thorny bushes
01:00:10okay i'm ready
01:00:22what do you think
01:00:27my god haley you are the most beautiful thing i have ever seen
01:00:32uh-uh-uh
01:00:34i just hunched over in a car mirror to do this lipstick
01:00:36you're not messing it up for at least 20 minutes
01:00:3820 more minutes
01:00:40i want in
01:00:41i do
01:00:45thank you all for using the prom voting site to catch your votes i hear we have a winner
01:00:53and your 2026 prom queen is
01:00:58jen longfellow
01:01:03thank you guys so much
01:01:06seriously this means the world to me
01:01:08i mean like who else would win right
01:01:11oh this is just the perfect moment
01:01:18oh my god that's hailey and cole
01:01:21it was fine
01:01:23since what did you get
01:01:24what is
01:01:28hey uh
01:01:30most 10 minutes up
01:01:31no
01:01:31but who cares
01:01:35hell yeah
01:01:39ew literally what the fuck
01:01:41hell yeah
01:01:42language
01:01:42i am the queen okay
01:01:44she's just a little pervy princess
01:01:46come on
01:01:47everyone say it with me
01:01:48pervy princess
01:01:50pervy princess
01:01:51pervy princess
01:01:56wait
01:01:58wait wait wait
01:01:59what are those
01:02:00those are texts between me and my dad
01:02:01make cole edmunds fall in love with you
01:02:05his dad's month is essential to funding my campaign
01:02:08don't worry daddy
01:02:10if i can't have
01:02:12no one can
01:02:13i'm gonna destroy hayley roth's life is this real
01:02:17jen's crazy
01:02:21who did this
01:02:22who did this
01:02:25what
01:02:26you exploited me for a hacking job and didn't think i was gonna hack your phone
01:02:30you little skit
01:02:32you know jen
01:02:33as the principal
01:02:35i'm supposed to remain impartial
01:02:37and above all of this petty drama
01:02:40but
01:02:41quite frankly
01:02:42you are the worst
01:02:44and i think it's time that you are expelled from edmunds academy
01:02:49you can't do that
01:02:50i'm the principal so uh
01:02:52yes i can
01:03:02there was no internship
01:03:04you lied to me
01:03:18oh my princess finally has a crown
01:03:22now all i need is my handsome prince
01:03:24oh
01:03:25yeah no can do
01:03:27all i have to offer
01:03:28is a bowie knight with a chip on his shoulder
01:03:31and a awesome sense of humor
01:03:33oh
01:03:34how can i refuse
01:03:40oh no that's my dad
01:03:45we are going home right now
01:03:48you disobeyed me for the last time boy
01:03:50yeah i'm not a boy dad
01:03:52you talk all the time
01:03:54about wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name
01:03:57yet you can't see i've already become that man
01:04:01and it's because of hayley
01:04:02and you can accept that
01:04:04i'll make my own path
01:04:05and best believe me i can
01:04:08i'll say this
01:04:10it's the most backbone i've ever seen in you cole
01:04:15joy pro
01:04:23i am so proud of you
01:04:26i can't have done with all you being by my son
01:04:29that was terrifying
01:04:31it's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before
01:04:34well so
01:04:35i love you bala queen
01:04:37i love you guacamole wizard
01:04:39oh my god i gotta change that username
01:04:41yeah you do
01:04:42oh my god
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