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00:00You
00:30Can we put a lab on time, Guy?
00:32Do I have a shirt on?
00:33Some more.
00:34Do I have a shirt on?
00:35Do you see that I have a shirt on?
00:37I see that you don't.
00:38I don't have a shirt on.
00:39Are you putting a shirt on?
00:40Your perspective is right.
00:41You're ready.
00:42I'm ready today.
00:43You got my launch on?
00:44Yeah.
00:45Everyone should know the time.
00:46Well, it's just to know when the big clean-up starts.
00:49Big clean-up.
00:50I have an alarm set twice on my phone.
00:52Big clean-up.
00:53Well, it's a big clean-up.
00:54So we're making one cup of spaghetti?
00:56You want more meat than that?
01:00I'm Matty Matheson, and welcome to Just The Dash!
01:10It's a cooking show.
01:11Today, we are going to make a Cincinnati spaghetti.
01:15One of the most gorgeous dishes of all time.
01:19It was love at first sight.
01:20Is it a chili?
01:21Is it a spaghetti?
01:22Is it a...
01:23It's a chili spaghetti.
01:25Why is it just that?
01:26Okay, perfect.
01:27It's one of the 20 most iconic dishes in America.
01:30It's in the fucking Smithsonian.
01:32I bet your eyes went right to the cheddar cheese.
01:35There's going to be a mountain of cheese on this.
01:37And that's why I made it.
01:38I saw it and I was like, that is what the fuck I'm talking about.
01:41So I'm going to blend up all of the vegetables.
01:44I want a little spice, a little sweetness from the pepper.
01:47I'm going to leave the seeds in.
01:48We're living risky.
01:49We're living risky.
01:50I'm going to use a quarter of a green pepper.
01:53The thing that I love doing about, is that a sentence?
01:57Let's bring it back.
01:59Let's bring it back.
02:00Half an onion.
02:02If I'm making like a ground beef, minced meat, when I make it something like that, I want my vegetables to blend.
02:08I don't want to see big pieces of celery or anything like that.
02:12Three cloves of garlic.
02:13I really just want to, you know, it to blend in.
02:20A little bit of olive oil.
02:22Just to bring it together.
02:23Okay?
02:24Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
02:27Blendy.
02:28Here we go.
02:31The thing, oh.
02:34That looks really good.
02:37That looks really good.
02:40So we're going to add a little bit more olive oil.
02:43And now I'm just going to cook the sofrito.
02:45And we're just going to reduce it to a sludge.
02:50Cause what do I love doing?
02:53Making sludge.
02:54I want you to reduce it.
02:56And that fat kind of splits and you can stir it and emulsify the fat back into it.
03:02Welcome to just a sludge.
03:05I'm your host, sludge.
03:07And today we're making sludge.
03:10So good.
03:11It's raining.
03:12Oh, it hasn't rained in like three weeks.
03:18As a farmer, we need rain.
03:22I got my spices here.
03:24Here we go.
03:25Let's get it right the first time.
03:26I'm going to do half a tablespoon of cayenne.
03:28Half a spoon.
03:30Smoked paprika.
03:31Mexican chili powder.
03:33One tablespoon.
03:34Dried oregano.
03:37One pinch.
03:38Just a dash.
03:39Ground coriander.
03:41Half a tablespoon.
03:42Cumin.
03:43One tablespoon.
03:45Cinnamon.
03:46This is delicate.
03:48Not a lot.
03:49Just a little bit.
03:50We're making the mega spice.
03:52Binging with Maddie.
03:54Burn it.
03:55Fuck.
03:56Take it off the heat.
03:57Let's pack these up real quick.
03:58We've got to get moving.
03:59Sound got everything good?
04:00Got to get moving.
04:01It's just a dash time.
04:02Okay.
04:03So once I start actually cooking, you fuck off.
04:06I need tomato peas.
04:07We've got to go.
04:08I was making up for lost time because Sound Guy rat fucked me.
04:11Are you serious?
04:12That can't be true.
04:13About 25 minutes.
04:14That can't be true?
04:16I've never seen a double rainbow in real life.
04:18I literally saw one like last week in Toronto.
04:20That's you.
04:21I'm me.
04:22So that wasn't because I was burning the sofrito or anything like that.
04:27Burn it.
04:28Fuck.
04:29I get rat fucked.
04:30Guess what?
04:31I make up for lost time.
04:32Only.
04:33This is the only spoon on set.
04:34No.
04:35There's six spoons right there.
04:36Okay.
04:37Some days it's like pushing a boulder that's cemented to the ground uphill.
04:42One.
04:43Two tablespoons tomato paste.
04:45Let's move it.
04:46And Sound Guy's that cement.
04:49Put my belt on.
04:50Hold on.
04:51And I'm the boulder.
04:52I don't like anything to move.
04:54And he won't let me go.
04:56What are you doing?
04:57For a second.
04:58Chop up your garlic.
05:00I want to be free.
05:04Put it under the breast meat.
05:06We always know that.
05:07Is that garlic?
05:08Chop up your chocolate.
05:10Can you hear it?
05:11Seems like a lot.
05:12Throw it in.
05:13No.
05:14Couldn't we just put one microphone up in the room?
05:15I yell half.
05:16I yell 90% of the time.
05:17Can opener.
05:18Chocolate's a burning.
05:19Tomato puree.
05:20Don't do that.
05:21Sound Guy.
05:22Don't do that.
05:23Sound Guy.
05:24Don't do that.
05:25Sound Guy.
05:26Sound Guy.
05:27Don't laugh.
05:28Yeah.
05:29Worcestershire sauce.
05:30That one was on you.
05:31What have I done?
05:32I'm standing here.
05:33Rinse out your can with beef stock.
05:34Swish it around.
05:35Don't swish it around.
05:36One microphone could hear me.
05:37You gotta hear me what?
05:38Breathing heavy.
05:39Like a gopher.
05:40And it's bubbling already.
05:42What?
05:55Stir it, gently.
05:56Turn it down.
05:57Turn it down low.
05:58Turn it down low.
05:59Yeah.
06:00Yeah.
06:01Turn it down low.
06:02Yeah, yeah, yeah.
06:03Turn it down low.
06:04Turn it down low.
06:05Yeah, yeah, yeah.
06:06Turn it down low.
06:08We got our sauce.
06:10It's a very beautiful tomato sauce.
06:13If you want to brown your beef, brown your beef.
06:16But I don't want it.
06:18So I'm literally going to take this entire thing.
06:22Okay.
06:24This.
06:26This is your brain on drugs.
06:29It kind of looks like you.
06:32This kind of looks like me.
06:33You know, unless it is actually the same color.
06:42Hello.
06:43Hello.
06:44Hello.
06:45Hello.
06:46Oh, no.
06:47Where the fuck am I?
06:50Hi, kids.
06:51I'm Sludge.
06:53Welcome to Just a Sludge.
06:55Hi, kid.
06:56Okay, what am I doing?
06:58Why do I listen to you?
07:01How's that going to be good for my career?
07:04We're not sure.
07:05Put me down.
07:06Oh, put me down.
07:08You can't hear me?
07:09So two pounds.
07:10Is this two pounds?
07:11One pound.
07:11Two pounds?
07:12I think it's one.
07:12I weighed it on my arm.
07:14If he wasn't so cute, I'd have to kill him.
07:18This is about two pounds.
07:19Okay?
07:19This is going to go in.
07:22Is it bath time, daddy?
07:23What I'm going to do is kind of let this bubble up around it.
07:31And we're just going to Sludge it up.
07:33You're damn straight we are.
07:34This guy fucking gets it.
07:36We are on our way.
07:37So right now, this looks a little loose.
07:39Oh, this looks like a bad night.
07:43I want it to be thick.
07:45I want it to be like scoopy.
07:47And right now, it's not scoopy.
07:49Right now, it's kind of wet and undesirable.
07:51I need time.
07:54In one hour, this is going to be really good, okay?
07:57As you reduce, it just powers it up.
07:59It powers it up.
08:00It powers it up.
08:01Sludge is powerful.
08:03Sludge is beautiful.
08:04Oh, he does love me.
08:06Yeah, so this is, now we're waiting for an hour.
08:10Should we, do a big cleanup?
08:15The big, let me just talk about the big cleanup.
08:18Every night, everyone makes fun of me because I'm always like,
08:20big cleanup, guys.
08:21Yeah, we know.
08:22We, we clean your entire house every night.
08:25My eyes, my mind, allow me to see maybe what other people don't see.
08:31Because I care too much.
08:34See this lip right here?
08:35Can you see, please, we're trying to show.
08:37You need me?
08:38No, no, obviously not.
08:39So, uh, just come on over here.
08:41There's a film.
08:43There's a filth.
08:45There's a debris.
08:46Here.
08:47Now, come, come, come.
08:49What's that?
08:49Rotten meat?
08:50This is a trichinosis.
08:52I have young children.
08:53Come, looks up.
08:56Dead.
08:57This is the problem, society.
08:59So tonight, it's going to be a little bit different.
09:02But, you know, we're going to have to take things a bit serious.
09:06And what are they, what are they doing?
09:07Are they laughing?
09:09Trisha!
09:12No answer.
09:13You know why?
09:14She's at the hospital with my children.
09:17Can you see it?
09:18Oh, yeah.
09:18Step the fuck up.
09:20Step the fuck up.
09:21I haven't even started cooking.
09:23I haven't even started cooking today.
09:25Fuck it.
09:26Let's go.
09:28One more time!
09:30One more time!
09:34This isn't the big cleanup.
09:35This is a cleanup.
09:36This sure fucking sucks.
09:39Let me just breathe for a second.
09:41Yeah, so this is, uh, now we're waiting for it.
09:52How's your bagel?
09:53Anything on set that shouldn't be?
09:56Do you say bagel?
09:57Uh, uh.
10:03Don't put stuff on my area, okay?
10:07My area is a safe place.
10:09Sludge is a guy that thinks he's flying.
10:12Also known as a buster.
10:15Always feeling that way, you know.
10:17He just sits on his...
10:20No, no, no.
10:21I don't want no sludges.
10:23Oh, what is this?
10:25Oh, what are you doing?
10:27The passenger side of his best friend's right, trying to find me.
10:33Something's happening.
10:35I can feel it.
10:37Power's it up.
10:38Power's it up.
10:39Power's it up.
10:40Oh, yeah, right there.
10:41Sludge is powerful.
10:45Here I come.
10:46Yeah, yeah.
10:46Sludge?
10:49What's up, YouTube?
10:50It's your favorite highbrow human guy.
10:52Sludgy man, listen.
10:53No, no, Sludge.
10:55Mate, Sludge.
10:56Sludge.
10:56You can talk later, man.
10:58But you summoned me, sweetheart.
10:59Everyone's gonna have their turn.
11:00I'm gonna talk.
11:01Michelle can talk.
11:02Sludge can talk.
11:03Hey, Mishi.
11:05Can you hear me?
11:06It gets to this point where it just starts bubbling hard.
11:09Hi, Michelle's here.
11:10Check this out.
11:11Oh, fuck.
11:12Watch as I splat this fat cat.
11:15Oh, my God.
11:18Sludge.
11:19Oh.
11:20Oh, did that hurt, Mr. Frog Farmer?
11:23No.
11:24That's not nice, Sludge.
11:26We don't name call.
11:27We don't name call on this show.
11:29Oh, my sincerest apologies, me lord.
11:32Okay, thank you.
11:33Thank you very much, Sludge.
11:35That was nice of you.
11:36Oh, this is good.
11:37Let's take a fucking pull off the fucking big dark roast.
11:43You drink like a fucking pelican.
11:45Who?
11:46Huh?
11:47We have our beautiful chili sauce.
11:51Oh, I see you looking at my ass.
11:54No.
11:54So, the one thing that I haven't done is added salt.
12:00Yeah, there's no salt.
12:02Okay.
12:03There's no salt.
12:04So, there's no salt.
12:05So, just a dash of salt.
12:09Bro!
12:11You blow off of it.
12:15Oh, it's going in my mouth.
12:18You like it.
12:19No.
12:19You like it.
12:24Big time.
12:25No.
12:26No.
12:26No.
12:27No, I don't.
12:28Yes, you do.
12:32Is that bomb?
12:35Sludge is good.
12:35It's a good sludge?
12:36Look at this.
12:37Sludge hammer.
12:38Sludge hammer.
12:40A hundred and eight.
12:41That's the wrong song.
12:42Okay.
12:43I'm fucking pumped up.
12:44Choo-choo-choo-choo.
12:46Choo-choo-choo-choo.
12:48Choo-choo-choo-choo-choo.
12:50Nothing's in the oven.
12:52We're going to do the cheese.
12:53We're going to get the cheese and the onion.
12:55Then, this is it.
12:56Cincinnati chili.
12:57I want to suck.
12:58What?
12:58I want to suck in your toes.
12:59Okay.
13:00Okay.
13:01Boom.
13:01Let's cut up the onion.
13:02What do you say we run away to give them a big slappy papi?
13:06I'm not going to leave Trish.
13:07She's the mother of my children, dude.
13:09I can't travel to Cincinnati right now, but let me tell you,
13:12we're going to be eating Cincinnati tonight.
13:15I already told you, you can hang, but, you know, there's no funny business.
13:18We're friends.
13:19With benefits.
13:21It's going to seem like a lot of cheese.
13:24You're ground beef.
13:25So what?
13:26We don't kink shame around here.
13:27Oh, yeah.
13:28So this is my portion of cheese.
13:30Sludge, get the picture.
13:37You're going to be a part of us.
13:39We're going to eat you.
13:40And then you're a part of my soul forever.
13:47Drop the spaghetti.
13:49Spaghetti.
13:52Don't you get it, Sludge?
13:53It's greater than marriage.
13:56Stop the talking and show me what that mouth do, baby.
14:00Every second that it is on the stove, it only gets better.
14:04Look at this.
14:04Plate me.
14:05All right.
14:10Cincinnati spaghetti.
14:12A little Cincinnati chili.
14:15Let's give it a good stir.
14:16Really emulsify those fats in there.
14:21One.
14:22We're going to do two ladles worth.
14:24We're going to do some onion on top.
14:32So excited for this.
14:34And I'm excited to suck your toes from the inside out.
14:38I'm going to put some cheese.
14:40I feel like that's the right amount.
14:42Cincinnati chili.
14:44This is Cincinnati chili spaghetti.
14:46Shredded cheese.
14:49Chili.
14:50Spaghetti noodles.
14:52Cincinnati.
14:59All the cheese is slowly melting in.
15:02The onions.
15:03Going to give it that bright sharpness.
15:05First time I've ever had Cincinnati chili.
15:08Let's dig in.
15:09Oh, mama.
15:10Oh.
15:13See, I like to pull from the middle.
15:14And we're just going to give it a little mix up here.
15:17Man, this is incredible.
15:18This is, this looks warm.
15:21Okay.
15:22Don't burn your mouth today again.
15:24Don't burn your mouth today again.
15:25Don't burn your mouth today again.
15:27Oh, fuck.
15:28Fuck.
15:31Yeah.
15:31Don't burn your mouth today again.
15:32If you believe in me.
15:36I believe in me.
15:37Don't burn your mouth today.
15:39Don't burn my mouth today.
15:40I will want you to walk with me now.
15:45No.
15:47No.
15:48It's so good.
16:10I'll let that.
16:11Oh, fuck.
16:11Fuck.
16:13I need it.
16:18We're going to need a big clean up tonight.
16:24It's a big fucking clean up.
16:26You know, I was thinking about what I was going to do today.
16:29What was tonight?
16:31Might as well do a big cleanup.
16:42It's a big cleanup tonight.
16:46I'm Matty Madison.
16:49And this is just a spaghetti.
16:52It's a sludge!
16:53I'd like to thank my co-host today, Sludge!
16:57We miss you! We love you!
16:59Thank you!
17:03Like, subscribe, hit that bell icon.
17:16Sludge is, you know, maybe the future of food.
17:20Who knows?
17:21I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but there's going to be a big cleanup.
17:24You know, just buckets of sludge.
17:26You make your sludge for the week, and you eat your sludge.
17:28You know how I feel about a big cleanup?
17:31Mmm.
17:33The way I feel about the Cincinnati spaghetti.
17:36I need a glass of milk.
17:38I need a glass of milk.
17:39Ah!
17:44You need a glass of milk.
17:46I'm gonna have some milk.
18:13No heartburn now.
18:15See you later.
18:23Good night, everyone.
18:24I'd just like to thank Sludge and fucking Sound Guy.
18:27Guys, another great episode.
18:28Thank you very much.
18:29Shout out to Cincinnati for making a beautiful dish.
18:31And, you know, hopefully I didn't fuck it up.
18:34I love you guys very much.
18:35World peace.
18:36Please.
18:37You'll answer.
18:41And if you're stranded in the rain,
18:45I will shout to you.
18:50We both know.
18:52Grey skies always linger on.
18:57But I'll always be here.
19:15I'll be here.
19:16I'll be here.
19:17You'll be here.
19:18Thanks for having me.
19:19I'll be here.
19:20I'll be here.
19:21You'll be here.
19:22I'm here.
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