- 18 hours ago
The Assembly S02E01 Stephen Fry
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00:29Transcription by ESO. Translation by —
00:30Hello. Hello. Nice to see you.
00:32Nice to see you. Nice to see you, Caroline.
00:33Caroline. Hello. Hello there.
00:35Good to see you all.
00:37I heard you went to Buckingham Palace
00:39and do drugs,
00:42making drugs and cocaine.
00:44I didn't go in order
00:45to do that.
00:46So why did you go in
00:49to Buckingham Palace?
00:51I mean, I'm
00:53not going to justify it.
00:55Right.
00:58You're not doing that no more.
01:00No, I'm a good boy now.
01:01Good.
01:06It's going to be hard.
01:07Oh, I know. I've seen it. I've seen you guys
01:10smiling assassins.
01:19Chardonnay, would you like
01:20to introduce us?
01:23Welcome to the Assembly,
01:25our collective of autistic,
01:28neurodiversion
01:28and non-disabled interviews.
01:30We are delighted to have you
01:32today.
01:33Our rules are no subject
01:35is out of bounds,
01:36no question is off the table,
01:38and all might happen.
01:40Please tell us who you are.
01:41Hello, I'm Stephen Fry.
01:44I'm an actor and a writer,
01:46busy myself around the world
01:48in different things,
01:49but mostly an actor and a writer.
01:50Thank you, Stephen Fry.
01:52That was the easy bit.
01:53Oh, dear.
01:55Now we have Cameron.
01:57First question.
01:58Hello.
01:59Hello, Cameron.
02:01My first question is a very
02:03serious one,
02:04so just prepare yourself.
02:05Okay.
02:07You tried to kill yourself
02:08a couple of times.
02:09Are you happy to be alive now?
02:12I am, Cameron.
02:13I am happy to be alive,
02:15but it was a pretty,
02:16pretty terrible experience.
02:18Wow.
02:19I was in agony in my mind
02:22and didn't want to live,
02:23but I can't bring back that feeling,
02:25so it's a kind of alien.
02:27It's like looking at myself
02:28as another person.
02:30I compare it to
02:31if you've ever broken a leg
02:33or had a really painful injury.
02:35You know that you screamed in agony,
02:37but you can't make that pain
02:39come back to you now, can you?
02:41Can't make your leg hurt again.
02:43And it's a bit the same with the mind.
02:45So you're happy now?
02:46I think so.
02:48Like a lot of people,
02:49I almost don't dare say I'm happy,
02:51but that's stupid,
02:52because if you are happy,
02:53you should enjoy it.
02:57Thank you very much, Cameron.
02:59And do you know that your name
03:00is an anagram of romance?
03:02Oh, wow.
03:04No, I didn't know that, actually.
03:07Isn't that nice?
03:07There you go.
03:08Yeah.
03:11Right, we're coming to Thomas Love now.
03:17My first question is,
03:19can you help me meet
03:21my idol and icon and legend,
03:25the amazing human being,
03:27the Queen of Pop,
03:29Dame Celine Marie Claudette Dion?
03:37I wish I could help you there.
03:39I'm afraid I don't know Celine Dion.
03:42I think I was once in the same room as her,
03:44but I didn't speak to her.
03:46But she is a marvellous talent,
03:48and your admiration is focused
03:50on a very worthy, worthy idol.
03:53I'm in London,
03:54that means I'm gay,
03:55I'm pride, LGBT.
03:57What is your advice
03:57on finding a husband, question mark?
04:00Well, I mean,
04:02it's a different world now,
04:03because so many spouses
04:05are found online.
04:07Yeah.
04:08But I guess,
04:09put yourself out there
04:10in a safe and happy
04:12kind of environment.
04:14But I'm afraid I'm out of that game,
04:17and have been for 11 years
04:18since I found my husband.
04:20Because I want to find a boyfriend
04:21and be a dad one day
04:22and have a son and daughter.
04:23Oh, well, you deserve to be happy
04:25as everyone does.
04:26I'm sure you will.
04:27Yeah.
04:28My last question,
04:29final question is,
04:30are you a top or a bottom?
04:35Another London question,
04:36another LGBT pride question.
04:39Wow.
04:40That is as direct as it gets.
04:46I'm going to leave that a mystery
04:48for people to get.
04:49I think that's best.
04:50Thank you for raising
04:51at a very important point.
04:53There is V in the middle,
04:55of course, versatile.
04:56Is there not?
04:57Amazing.
04:58Thank you, Thomas.
04:59That was a great moment.
05:01Nicola will be next.
05:05Hello, Stephen.
05:06Hello, Nicola.
05:09What order do you
05:11wash your body parts?
05:14In what order
05:16do I wash my body parts?
05:18Yeah.
05:19In a shower,
05:20I don't use shampoo.
05:22Shampoo?
05:23No.
05:24Can I use shampoo?
05:25Just water.
05:27With the hair?
05:28Yeah.
05:29When I shampooed,
05:30I'd do my hair first.
05:31I would do my intimate areas
05:33with a sponge
05:35or, you know,
05:36one of those little,
05:37what do you call them?
05:38The shower?
05:38Scruncher.
05:39Shower.
05:39It's a scruncher.
05:40A scruncher.
05:42So I think downstairs
05:43and then upstairs.
05:45How much have you spent
05:47on cocaine?
05:49Oh, my goodness.
05:50It has burned your cocaine.
05:51Yeah.
05:51That is embarrassing.
05:52Yeah, well,
05:53you've got me there.
05:54There was a period
05:55when I was an addict
05:57to the stuff
05:58and it was,
05:59in those days,
06:01£60 a gramme
06:02and I probably
06:05wasted thousands.
06:06Where did you get
06:07the cocaine from?
06:08Where?
06:08You get a dealer.
06:09A dealer?
06:10A dealer, yeah.
06:11Wow.
06:11Where did you get that?
06:12Where did you get
06:13the dealer from?
06:13Where?
06:14A friend offers you some
06:15on one occasion
06:16when, you know,
06:17I can remember
06:17the first time
06:18I was offered
06:19the, they called it
06:20a line of cocaine
06:22and you snorted
06:23up your nose.
06:24Like that?
06:25Up your nose?
06:25He said,
06:26oh, I got this guy
06:26so-and-so
06:27and he gives you
06:27the number of the guy
06:28and then you know the guy.
06:29Well, you've been
06:31drinking on crack cocaine
06:33and putting it up your nose.
06:34Yeah, up your nose.
06:35Yeah, not crack cocaine,
06:36that's your smoke, I think.
06:37I've never had that.
06:38No, you haven't had that yet?
06:39I haven't.
06:40No, don't say yes.
06:43Honestly, I know
06:44it's terrible because-
06:45Did you inject it?
06:45No, I couldn't
06:46inject myself either.
06:47Cooking, no?
06:48No.
06:48Maybe a weight loss drug,
06:50maybe.
06:51Oh, okay.
06:52Not doing it no more?
06:53Oh, no, no.
06:53And I wouldn't recommend
06:54anybody do it, obviously.
06:56But I would also recommend
06:58we're all very grown up
06:58about it.
06:59We understand why people
07:00seem to want to do it
07:01and maybe find a better answer
07:05than simply condemning
07:06everybody for doing it.
07:07Because in the world,
07:08the most important thing
07:09is to be effective,
07:10not to be right,
07:11but to find a way
07:12to solve a problem.
07:14Thank you, Nicola.
07:15Yeah.
07:16Nice to meet you.
07:18You can't do this
07:19back in the palace.
07:20No, I know.
07:21It's just great.
07:22Well, you shouldn't do it anywhere.
07:24Oh, God.
07:25Right, we're coming to Harry now.
07:29Hello, sir, Stephen.
07:30How are you?
07:31Very well, thank you.
07:34I read that you are bipolar.
07:36Yes.
07:37One of my family has that.
07:39Yeah.
07:40How can I help him, please?
07:41Oh, that's such a good question.
07:43It really is.
07:46The first thing to realise
07:48is that it's an illness.
07:49It's not something
07:50that can be wished away.
07:52It is a real thing.
07:55It's worth thinking of it
07:57as being like the weather.
07:58Now, the weather is real.
08:00You can't pretend
08:01it's not raining
08:02when it's raining.
08:03You can't say,
08:04no, it's not raining.
08:05It's ridiculous.
08:06You're getting wet.
08:07It's really raining.
08:08Yes.
08:08But on the other hand,
08:09it's also true
08:10that you didn't make it rain.
08:13The rain happens.
08:15It's not your fault
08:16that it's raining.
08:18You shouldn't beat yourself up
08:19and say,
08:20why am I depressed?
08:21I shouldn't be.
08:21That's like saying
08:22it shouldn't be raining.
08:24It's not something
08:25in your control.
08:27It will eventually stop.
08:29It always has
08:30and it always will stop
08:31and the sun will come out
08:33at some point.
08:34And so that's what it's like
08:37with a mood disorder
08:39like bipolar
08:40and it's difficult
08:42but it's worth remembering
08:45that it's not their personality,
08:47it's the weather inside them
08:49and it will change.
08:53Yeah.
08:57We're going to come to Luca now
08:58and he's got something
08:59he'd like to show you.
09:01Hey, Luca.
09:04The World is Too Much for Us
09:06by William Wordsworth.
09:08My favourite poems.
09:11The world is too much with us
09:13late and soon
09:15getting and spending
09:17we lay waste our powers
09:19little we know of nature
09:21that is ours
09:22we have given our hearts away
09:24a sordid boon
09:28this sea
09:29that bears her bosom
09:31to the moon
09:31the winds
09:32that will be howling
09:33at all hours
09:34and are up gathered now
09:35like sleeping flowers
09:37for this
09:39for everything
09:40we are out of tune
09:42it moves us not
09:44great god
09:45I'd rather be a pagan
09:46suckered in a creed outworn
09:50so might I
09:52standing on this pleasant lee
09:54have glimpses
09:56that will make me
09:56less forlorn
09:58have sight of Proteus
10:00rising from the sea
10:01or hear old Triton
10:03blow his reefed horn
10:08my dear fellow
10:09that's absolutely wonderful
10:12I love that
10:13and you delivered it
10:15with such passion
10:17and power
10:17we are out of tune
10:19don't you agree
10:20yes
10:20it's getting and spending
10:23it meant a huge amount
10:25to me Luca
10:25and beautifully done
10:26as you can see
10:27I'm very moved by it
10:28I love poetry
10:29and that is one of my favourite poems
10:31beautifully done
10:33wonderful
10:34right we've got Jacob up now
10:36hi
10:38you've done adverts
10:41for Heineken
10:42Alliance and Leicester
10:45Twinings Tea
10:46okay
10:47Pioneer Hi-Fi
10:49Walker's Crisps
10:51Marks and Spencers
10:53Honda
10:55wow that's a lot
10:56Virgin Media
10:58extra strong mints
11:01after 8 minutes
11:03Sainsbury's
11:05Heathrow Airport
11:07Direct Line
11:09EE
11:10and finally
11:11Whitbread
11:12is there anything
11:14you wouldn't do for money
11:15oh my gosh
11:20wow you pinned me there
11:22I am a tart
11:25I am a tart
11:30thanks for reminding me
11:33my next question
11:34is why did you go
11:36on Channel 4
11:37in 2022
11:38saying you were proud
11:39to be a Jew
11:40if you are an atheist
11:45atheist
11:45because being a Jew
11:46and an atheist
11:47is not a contradiction
11:48but plenty of Jews
11:50like me are atheists
11:51Sigmund Freud
11:52Albert Einstein
11:53were Jews
11:53and they
11:54if they had stayed in Germany
11:56and Austria
11:56they would have been
11:58gassed and killed
11:58like any other Jew
12:00but I went on Channel 4
12:03to give that alternative
12:03Christmas message
12:04because there had been
12:06a disturbing rise
12:07in anti-Semitism
12:08and you know
12:08desecration of Jewish shops
12:09and you know
12:10swastikas on Jewish gravestones
12:12and all these sort of things
12:14yeah it's terrible
12:15I thought of my mother
12:16in particular
12:17just I think you know
12:18she's still alive
12:19and she always had
12:21and as her parents did
12:22a faith in coming to Britain
12:23was a place of openness
12:25for Jews
12:25and that they would be
12:26as welcomed
12:26as all immigrants were
12:30and they would be
12:31just horrified
12:33all these terrible things
12:35happening in the world
12:35but we've got to stop
12:37making them reduced
12:39to racial hatred
12:41because that's never
12:42going to solve anything
12:43yeah
12:46Ben you're up
12:49alright
12:50so my first question
12:53is a bit of a touchy one
12:55alright
12:56so
12:57you attended a funeral
12:59and you were sat next
13:01to Paul McCartney
13:04how did you feel
13:05when Paul McCartney
13:07said to you
13:07shut up
13:08you can't sing
13:10I actually felt justified
13:12because I know
13:13I can't sing
13:14we had this mutual friend
13:15John Schlesinger
13:16film director
13:16and it was his funeral
13:18and during the singing
13:20I did what I always did
13:21I mimed
13:22yeah
13:25and Paul turned to me
13:26and Paul turned to me
13:26Stephen you're not singing
13:27why aren't you singing
13:28you should be singing
13:30I said
13:31Paul I can't sing
13:31he said
13:32everybody can sing
13:33sing
13:33so the next one
13:34I started singing
13:35and he said
13:35you're right
13:36you can't sing
13:37shut up
13:39so I wasn't
13:40the least bit offended
13:41I thought
13:42yes
13:42it's now official
13:44yeah
13:44do you know
13:45I'll tell you
13:45I'll tell you a story
13:46I used to do this program
13:48called Saturday Live
13:49and Hugh Laurie
13:50and I would do sketches together
13:52and in one of them
13:53we were doing this thing
13:54and I suddenly realized
13:55on like Thursday
13:56Hugh
13:57if we're doing the sketches
13:59the way we've written it
13:59it means I've got to sing
14:00that song
14:01I said
14:01you know I can't
14:02he said
14:02no I've heard
14:03you can sing
14:04if you're relaxed
14:05have you considered
14:07hypnotism
14:08and I'd never considered it
14:09and I found one
14:10it was in central London
14:11and I called up his office
14:12and he was Hungarian
14:14which somehow made it
14:14rather wonderfully
14:15the thick Hungarian accent
14:17so he said
14:19what is it you want of me
14:21I want you to put your hands
14:23on your knees
14:24and now you feel
14:25I am lowering you
14:26down a well
14:28all right
14:28so it gets darker
14:31and darker
14:32and darker
14:33into the well
14:33and you see
14:35the little
14:36little
14:36disk of light
14:37at the top
14:38is getting smaller
14:39and smaller
14:40and my voice
14:41is the rope
14:42that keeps you safe
14:43as you go down
14:44into the dark
14:45and I was going down
14:46and it really worked
14:46I was hypnotized
14:47so he said
14:48now when you're doing
14:50this program tomorrow
14:51what is the line
14:53that your friend
14:55gives you
14:55before you have to sing
14:57and I said
14:57well actually
14:58he says
14:58hit it bitch
15:00which is
15:01which is what he says
15:02and he said
15:03hit it bitch
15:04is what he said
15:05and I said yeah
15:06he said all right
15:07all right
15:08this is what he says
15:10that is a good cue
15:11when you hear
15:12the words
15:13hit it bitch
15:15you will be
15:16completely relaxed
15:18and you will be
15:19able to sing
15:21as if alone
15:22in the shower
15:23and now I pull
15:24on the rope
15:25and you come up
15:25the veil
15:26and we did the sketch
15:27and I did sing
15:28I was relaxed
15:29I wonder if it would
15:30still work for like
15:31any future sketches
15:32I don't know
15:33I shall have to find out
15:34all right thank you
15:35thank you
15:35it was a pleasure
15:36chatting to you
15:36thank you very much
15:37Ben that was great
15:38can I come to Claire now
15:41hello Stephen
15:42I'm Claire
15:43hello Claire
15:44you're 30 years older
15:46than your husband
15:49me and my girlfriend
15:50have an age gap
15:51I'm 38
15:52and she's 21
15:54what do you say
15:55to people
15:55who don't like
15:56age gap relationships
16:00I feel a bit
16:01sorry for them
16:02I don't see why
16:03they should have
16:04such an opinion
16:05about things
16:05but the only thing
16:07that matters
16:08in a relationship
16:10is love
16:10and if you feel it
16:12and it's felt
16:13on both sides
16:14and it's not
16:15an exploitative
16:16relationship
16:16I mean
16:17I would say to people
16:19that in our relationship
16:20Elliot has all
16:21all the power
16:22really
16:23he makes a lot
16:24of the decisions
16:25about things
16:26because I trust him
16:27too
16:27it just
16:28it works for us
16:30extremely well
16:31and if people
16:32don't like it
16:33well
16:34I find age
16:35is just a number
16:36at the end of the day
16:37as long as you're happy
16:38that's the main thing
16:39you're right Claire
16:39absolutely right
16:40yeah
16:41yeah
16:42thank you very much
16:44that was lovely
16:45okay next
16:45we're going to hear
16:46from Jin
16:47good job
16:48thank you
16:48hello Stephen
16:49my name is Jin
16:51like to drink
16:52oh wonderful
16:53who's your favourite
16:54world wrestling
16:56entertainment
16:56superstar
16:57let me know
17:01now Stephen
17:01please
17:02well this is all
17:03due to my husband
17:04my husband
17:05when he was a teenager
17:06was very fond
17:07of W and W and E
17:09W and W
17:11his favourite
17:11was Shawn Michaels
17:12the heartbreak kid
17:13I like The Undertaker
17:15and Roman Reigns
17:16is very fine
17:17Brock
17:17he's in Smashing Machine
17:18Brock Lesnar's
17:19stone cold
17:20Steve Austin
17:23people think Stephen
17:24you can't like wrestling
17:25but I actually do
17:26so I would say
17:27probably The Undertaker
17:28is my favourite
17:29thanks Steve
17:30thank you very much
17:31Jin
17:32we're going to hear
17:33from Huey now
17:34good morning
17:35Huey hi
17:38as a humanist
17:39do you think
17:40you'd believe
17:40in no life
17:41after death
17:41because you think
17:42God would hate you
17:44well
17:45no
17:45I just
17:47I would call myself
17:49a humanist
17:49I think it's a good word
17:50that's to say
17:51humanists put
17:52humans at the centre
17:53of our own destiny
17:55we make our own lives
17:56you know
17:57we're not told
17:57what to think
17:58by a group
18:00that claims
18:01to have secret answers
18:03written in a book
18:03our holy text
18:05is experience
18:06what we see in the world
18:07what we understand
18:08from evidence
18:10my belief is
18:11anybody who tells you
18:12they know what happens
18:13to a human being
18:14after they're dead
18:14is either a liar
18:16or a fool
18:16because nobody knows
18:18you just don't
18:20and
18:21personally
18:22I think
18:22if you believe
18:23there is no life
18:24after death
18:25it means you value life
18:27so completely
18:28because this is it
18:29and the idea
18:30that it's not enough
18:31is extraordinary to me
18:33people say
18:34oh this can't be all there is
18:35what?
18:36it isn't enough for you
18:37that there's Africa
18:38and Iceland
18:39and that there's
18:40waterfalls
18:41and fields
18:42and deserts
18:43and more animals
18:44than you can count
18:45more species of beetle
18:46alone
18:47than can be catalogued
18:48there is such richness
18:50diversity
18:50beauty
18:51and astonishing
18:52variety
18:53in this world
18:54that the idea of saying
18:54oh there's got to be
18:55more than this
18:56it just seems to me
18:57so arrogant and stupid
18:58to embrace everything
19:00we have
19:01because
19:01this is it
19:03our life
19:04and it's precious
19:07that was so nice
19:08thank you
19:14this is quite something
19:15really
19:16yeah
19:17do you need water
19:18or anything
19:19I'm fine
19:20thanks
19:21here we go
19:25I wish
19:27I knew
19:29how
19:31it would feel
19:33to be free
19:40I wish
19:43I could break
19:46all the chains
19:49holding me
19:56hit it bitch
19:58I wish
20:00I wish
20:01I could sing
20:02all the things
20:04that I should say
20:06say a loud
20:08say a clip
20:10for the whole
20:12around world
20:13to hear
20:14I wish
20:17I wish
20:18I could share
20:19all the love
20:21that's in my heart
20:23remove all the thoughts
20:27that keep us apart
20:31oh I wish
20:33you could know
20:35what it means
20:37to bring me
20:39then you'd see
20:41and agree
20:43that everyone
20:45should be free
21:06I wish
21:07I wish
21:08I could give
21:09all I'm longing
21:11to give
21:13I wish
21:15I could live
21:17like I'm longing
21:19to live
21:21here we go
21:22oh I wish
21:24I could
21:25all the things
21:27that I can do
21:29well now
21:29though I'm way
21:32overdue
21:34I'll be starting
21:36love you
21:37well I wish
21:40I could be
21:42like a bird
21:45in the sky
21:46how sweet
21:48how sweet
21:49it would be
21:50if I found
21:52I could cry
21:55oh I saw
21:57to the sun
21:59and look down
22:01at the sea
22:03that I'd say
22:07then I'd say
22:09cause I know
22:11yeah
22:11yeah
22:11then I'd say
22:14cause I know
22:20how it feels
22:24to be
22:29to be
22:31free
22:48Brilliant stuff and cracking song choice
22:50And Nicholas Sturgeon is in the hot seat next this Friday at 10 o'clock
22:55And if you've been affected by the issues raised in tonight's programme
22:58You can find details of organisations offering support on our website stv.tv slash advice
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