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00:01Previously on Doc
00:02Dr. Larson was in a car accident.
00:04She has no recollection of the last eight years.
00:07Babe, what's wrong?
00:08We got divorced.
00:09Where's your brother? Isn't he here?
00:11We lost Danny.
00:12I don't know who I am now or what I did.
00:15You're the reason I became a doctor.
00:17You created a toxic work environment.
00:19You were cold and arrogant.
00:21I wanted to be a doctor my entire life.
00:25She's protected. By law, we have to reintegrate her.
00:28So I'm basically a med student in a department I used to run.
00:31We were together.
00:32She has no memory.
00:33I want to tell her.
00:34She woke up still in love with her husband.
00:36I'd let that play out.
00:37There's something I need to tell you.
00:39Nora and I are having a baby.
00:41Maybe she needs to know there's something good on the horizon.
00:43I love you.
00:44Okay, I've loved you for a long time.
00:46My test results.
00:47I passed the boards.
00:49Well done, Dr. Larson.
00:50Couldn't have done it without you.
00:51He's my husband now.
00:53You don't remember, but you destroyed him.
00:55Keep your hands off of him.
00:56You can't waste your life pining over someone who doesn't really see you.
01:16Trauma teams to OR3.
01:17I need four units of Oneg.
01:19Prep rapid sequence intubation.
01:20We've got a GSW with heavy arterial bleed.
01:23And he's one of ours.
01:25Michael.
01:26What's going on?
01:36You've reached Dr. Jay Keller.
01:38Please leave a message.
01:39Thanks.
01:39Uh, fourth voicemail to go along with nine unreturned texts.
01:47And I just wanted to say, again, that what you saw isn't what you think you saw.
01:55I guess you took the day off yesterday.
01:58So I'm just really hoping that you'll be at the hospital today.
02:09Call Gina.
02:11Hi.
02:12I finally found out what happened with your patient from the train tragedy.
02:15And I know you're pissed at me.
02:18And I just want to say that I'm here and ready to face the music.
02:22Whatever it is.
02:24And I love you.
02:31Call Sonia Mitra.
02:36Want to tell me why Jake stormed out of the bar the other night?
02:39And then didn't show up for work yesterday?
02:41Nope.
02:41But feel free to ask him.
02:43Because I was thinking, maybe you've got a thing for him.
02:46But he's with Amy.
02:48Maybe you said something he didn't like.
02:51Great minds debate ideas.
02:53Average minds discuss events.
02:55Small minds gossip about people.
02:57Eleanor Roosevelt.
02:58Great mind.
03:01Rounds in five minutes.
03:02Dr. Mitra.
03:03Start with Terry Lewis, Vince Revelle, and Larry Bowden.
03:06I have discharge summaries in my inbox by 10.
03:09Morning.
03:11Uh, Dr. Larson, you'll be with TJ.
03:13But first a word.
03:21Okay.
03:22You wanted to talk.
03:23Talk.
03:27I...
03:29What you think you saw in Michael's office, I know how that looked.
03:33But that was just us saying goodbye.
03:36And the reason that goodbye had to happen?
03:39Is because his wife warned you to stay away from him, right?
03:43Uh...
03:43It...
03:43It was after everything happened with TJ's father, and Richard made me think that I'd killed Bill Dixon, and I
03:50just ended up with Michael just by accident.
03:54And...
03:55We kissed.
03:56But it was just, like, a moment of weakness, and...and the old feelings, and it was just a mess.
04:02And we both knew that it was wrong.
04:04You went to him.
04:05Now?
04:06Here you are, spitting, because you don't want to lose your security blanket?
04:09No, that's not...
04:09You went to him, because you're still living in the past, and he's still your home.
04:14He's not.
04:15Jake, I'm not.
04:16I mean, I'm trying.
04:19I'm...I'm...I'm...I'm...I'm trying so hard.
04:21I know. I know you are.
04:22And look, I know everyone's telling you how terrible you were during that time that you don't remember, which I'm
04:27sure makes it all very confusing.
04:30And yeah.
04:33She was a pain in the ass.
04:35And she didn't suffer fools, and she could be hard to reach, but man.
04:40When she reached her, she was worth it.
04:47That's the woman I fell in love with.
04:51I really miss her.
05:03I was waiting for you.
05:06But we can't do this.
05:08I know.
05:10Jake?
05:14Dr. Hamda, your wife is downstairs in OB.
05:21Are you alright?
05:22Well, my water broke.
05:23So, we're going into labor?
05:25Not necessarily.
05:26We could give her tocolytics to help delay this.
05:28Give the baby some time to mature.
05:30But the last ultrasound, you said he was at least five pounds, so why do we need more time?
05:34At seven weeks early, it's about his lung capacity.
05:36You're worried about his breathing?
05:37What about corticosteroids?
05:38For what?
05:39It helps the lungs mature faster.
05:41We can manage this.
05:43Just sit tight.
05:50We got this, okay?
05:56Rosie, you hear that, mamita?
05:59They got a heart, and it's a perfect match.
06:02They're finally coming through for you.
06:04After all this time.
06:10Why is she here?
06:12Dr. Larson will be assisting me today with your case.
06:14Well, I don't want her here.
06:15Dad.
06:17Have I done something to upset you?
06:19You don't even remember.
06:21Don't believe the doctors, Dad.
06:23It's not their fault.
06:24Uh, we will need to take Rosie to radiology now for a CT scan to prep for the transplant.
06:29More tests?
06:31You're doing great.
06:32We're gonna see you in a minute.
06:34Maybe you want to tell him the reason you don't remember.
06:37And dump my trauma onto him?
06:39What good would that do?
06:40Help us deal with her?
06:42I'm sure my bedside manner was awful.
06:45The only thing I can do now is to try to be nice.
06:49She's all set in there.
06:50Okay, let's get it going then.
06:53Scan is starting.
06:59I remember you saying you're a police officer.
07:02You know my folks are both cops.
07:04Mom's in the eighth, Dad was in the third until they burned down.
07:07Dark day.
07:09Where is he now? Retired?
07:10He's getting back to work soon.
07:12Matter of fact, Dr. Larson saved his life last week.
07:26Something wrong?
07:27We won't know until we do further tests, but there is a spot on her left lung.
07:31What does this mean for her transplant?
07:33If it's just an abscess, it's treatable.
07:36So, please, Alex, we know how much you want this to revoke.
07:38This is how it always is.
07:39She's either too sick or not sick enough.
07:41We're going to do everything we can.
07:42It took six years to get to the top of that list.
07:45We're not waiting anymore, you understand?
07:50We have to report this to Yunos.
07:57Hello.
07:58We are looking for Dr. Hamda.
08:00You were told he's down here.
08:01Oh, yes. His wife's in labor.
08:03Room four.
08:06I'll go get him.
08:15Like this?
08:16Yeah, yeah, yeah.
08:25Is everything all right?
08:26Uh, yeah.
08:28Nora's water broke seven weeks early, but I think we've got it under control.
08:33What's happening?
08:34We have a patient who's due for a heart transplant.
08:36The donor has crossed town at Eastside, and as of this morning, she's number one on the list.
08:39The problem is we found a spot on her lung.
08:41That I believe is an abscess.
08:43But could also be a systemic infection, which would disqualify her from the transplant.
08:47If we alert Yunos, she'll drop down the list and lose the heart.
08:50She could drop down.
08:51But they might be willing to wait until we run more tests.
08:53Either way, transparency is called for in case there's another eligible recipient.
08:57Well, how long until you figure out what the results of the CAT scan mean?
09:00Two, three hours to run the cultures and during the collection.
09:03This isn't just about your patient.
09:05If Yunos finds out we withheld this...
09:07For a couple hours?
09:08We could lose our accreditation.
09:10I don't think they'd be that punitive.
09:12But I...
09:13You're in charge.
09:14I am.
09:15So, thank you for bringing this to my attention.
09:18Email me her chart.
09:19I'll do my best to advocate for our patient.
09:29Dr. Singh says there's a heart available right now and she'd be next on the list.
09:33That we could do the transplant tomorrow morning.
09:34I know what he says.
09:35But things are moving fast and I need to warn you that there is a...
09:38Wait.
09:39You don't agree?
09:41She's not even in the ICU right now.
09:43There are treatments that could sustain her life for years
09:46before a transplant would be necessary.
09:49And she'd be in just as good a position then as she is today?
09:51There's no way to know.
09:52But even if it went well, all the immunosuppressants she'll have to take.
09:56All the... complications that she'll be facing.
09:59Don't let Dr. Singh make you think that this is a magic solution.
10:03Then why is he suggesting it?
10:05I'm sure he thinks it's inevitable.
10:09But you should know.
10:10She might not even survive a transplant.
10:13If it were me, I would take the time that I know I have right now.
10:25I appreciate you telling me.
10:51Something's changed.
10:54We're very sorry to tell you.
10:55It's that spot on her lung.
10:57What is it?
10:58We still don't know yet.
10:59Then what's the problem?
11:01We had to report what we saw to you.
11:04You ratted us out?
11:05Well, you're not even sure if it's an issue?
11:06We will do everything we can to get her well enough for the next available heart.
11:10Next available?
11:12She is hanging on by a thread.
11:13There are treatments that we can use.
11:15That's what you told me the last time and now look her.
11:17She's in the ICU.
11:19Sorry, I don't remember.
11:20You never even wanted us to get the transplant in the first place.
11:22And now you're doing it again.
11:24You're upset?
11:24We get that.
11:25Not a word to her.
11:26You got it?
11:29I never should have let you anywhere near us today.
11:35I'll get those tests going.
11:41What was that all about?
11:43A ghost of Christmas past come back to haunt me.
11:46I guess I wasn't so lovable back then after all.
11:59I'm not gonna let it happen again.
12:03Not this time.
12:36Hand me a radio and get into the elevator.
12:38Wait, what do you think I'm messing around?
12:41Hand me a radio and get out of here.
12:43okay
13:02sir
13:03excuse me sir
13:05hey
13:06hey
13:07hey what's going on man
13:17i'm not messing around
13:19you i need to talk to whoever's in charge right now
13:22you stay right there
13:23i need dr humda immediately
13:25we shot him
13:26get back
13:26i think it's several arteries
13:28alice you could die from that
13:30we have to get him to the or
13:33you
13:34i want you gone
13:36get him out of here
13:37what are you doing
13:38shut up
13:39just shut up
13:42contractions are starting to organize
13:43is that a problem
13:45meds just haven't kicked in yet
13:46could just take some time
13:47i'm sorry dr humda
13:48we need you out here
13:50be right back
13:53one of my guards confirmed he's armed
13:55people heard gunshots
13:56dr humda
14:00there's a man asking for you
14:01he says he's on the sixth floor
14:02and he has a gun
14:09this is michael humda chief medical officer
14:11who am i speaking with
14:12alex cruz
14:13i'm a cop
14:14i'm armed
14:15and i want my daughter's heart back
14:18your daughter is rosie
14:20you get me that heart in the next two hours
14:22or people up here start to die
14:23i'm told there were already gunshots
14:25one of your idiot doctors jumped me
14:27dr coleman was shot
14:29they're rushing into the OR
14:31i promise you
14:32we will do everything to get you that heart
14:34but i need to get those other patients off the floor
14:37oh you gotta be kidding me
14:38how do you think i'm going to stop the police from coming in there
14:41you shot someone
14:42now you need to show some goodwill
14:43if you really want to save your daughter
14:45well rosie needs care
14:46and i need hostages
14:47so i'll keep who i want
14:48you can have the rest in exchange for the heart
14:50i understand
14:51you need a couple of doctors
14:54maybe a nurse
14:55that's it
14:58what's your name
14:59julie
15:02and you
15:03sonia
15:03matra
15:05i'll keep nurse julie
15:07dr matra
15:09and dr larson
15:11she's the reason we're here
15:12she's not going anywhere
15:14what do you mean by that
15:15and just remember
15:16if my daughter dies
15:17i've got nothing to lose
15:36hey i need some help with this bed
15:41there's another patient in 624
15:43it's okay guys
15:44but we're back
15:44wait come on
15:45let's go
15:47okay hang on there buddy
15:48just hold on
15:49keep squeezing my hand tj
15:50just keep squeezing
15:51don't come up here
15:51that's an amount of surgery
15:53where are the surgeons
15:53right here
15:54it's me niger
15:55he's a b negative
15:55hypotensive
15:56attack
15:57he lost at least 1100 cc's here
15:58take over
15:58get the only gun and rapid infuser
16:00prep a central line
16:01they got you man
16:03team 4 moving in
16:05this will be the command post now
16:06so i need everybody moved
16:07to a different floor
16:08and any new lb patients divert
16:11we'll have our teams in position
16:12and hostage negotiator to portney
16:14no he already said
16:15he won't talk to anyone but me
16:16michael
16:18what's going on
16:21dr heller
16:22are you alright
16:22yeah i'm fine
16:23this is
16:24it's mostly tj's blood
16:26what can you tell us
16:27is he working alone
16:28was this planned
16:28no it was definitely improvised
16:30and yeah he's alone
16:31he's trying to cover both ends
16:32of the hallway from the icu
16:33so
16:34plenty of directions to go at him
16:36we're not taking an aggressive
16:37approach just yet
16:38okay
16:38not with a cock who knows
16:39how to handle himself
16:40this guy already shot
16:40one of our doctors
16:41which means he's willing
16:42to shoot more
16:43no we're not going in
16:44not if we can find another way right now
16:46he's got a problem with amy
16:47this is personal
16:48i know
16:49any idea why
16:50whatever it is
16:51it all started before i got here
16:54give me your phones
17:01okay
17:03what do we got to do to get it ready
17:04i i i don't know what to do to help you
17:07until i understand why i'm the reason that this is happening
17:11you can't be serious
17:13i was in a car accident four months ago
17:15lost a lot of my memory
17:17give me a break
17:18it's true
17:22six years ago
17:23you talked us out of the transplant
17:25and we were never in a better position
17:27than we were that day
17:28so there must have been a reason
17:29did i tell you why
17:31you convinced us
17:32she wouldn't be much better with a new heart
17:33scared us enough that we went against the cardiologist
17:36now i'm done with the past
17:41you said she has an abscess
17:42that needs to be dealt with
17:43what do we got to do
17:44i said i hoped it was an abscess
17:47and that we needed a cat scan
17:48in order to help locate the spot
17:50well we're not moving
17:50so you got to deal with it here
17:51we can drain it
17:52with ultrasound guidance
17:55do you know how to do that
17:56no but i saw you do it last year
17:58so what does that mean
18:00can you talk her through it
18:01i think so
18:03then do it
18:05now
18:10everheart memorial
18:11hey is this cardiology
18:12yes it is
18:13this is dr gina walker
18:14over at west side of minneapolis
18:15i'm looking for dr singh
18:16what's this about
18:17yeah it's regarding an old patient of his
18:19and it's important
18:20he's doing an interoperative echo
18:22it'll be a few hours
18:24okay so
18:25it looks like rosie was eligible for a transplant
18:28six years ago
18:28and amy discouraged it
18:30but
18:30i don't see why
18:32right after danny died
18:33anytime her patient was a child
18:35she pushed the parents towards caution
18:37sometimes she was right
18:39sometimes
18:40maybe not
18:44we had an argument this morning
18:46i was ignoring her calls
18:50you know segree to send the heart
18:51surgeons at east side are preparing the removal as we speak
18:54did i know what's happening here
18:55i told them we confirmed rosie's viable
18:57we were lucky they didn't find another recipient yet
19:00i also said you're on your way to east side to receive the heart
19:03there's an ambulance waiting
19:07does the board know what you just did
19:10i'm not involving them right now
19:22hey sweetheart
19:23dad what's going on over there
19:24with nora she's okay
19:26no no there's a guy with a gun
19:27it's all over the internet
19:28is it a prank
19:29um no
19:30we do have an incident
19:31but the police are here
19:32everything's under control
19:33what about mom
19:34because she's not answering her phone
19:36and we had to evacuate a bunch of people from her floor
19:39so she's going to be swamped for the next few hours
19:41but she's fine
19:41she's nowhere near the problem
19:45just
19:46go back to your classes
19:47let me deal with what's going on here
19:49okay
19:49okay
19:50and tell mom to call me as soon as she can
19:53of course
19:53love you
19:54bye
20:01how am i going to avoid the pulmonary artery
20:03you used the sternal notch as a landmark last time
20:10okay
20:14syringe
20:21favor the midline
20:27how risky is that
20:29very
20:31this is my team's alpha beta
20:33prepare to go on my order
20:34copy
20:35standing by
20:37how's my angle
20:39too steep
20:40you're close to the branch artery
20:42oh i see it
20:46too shallow
20:47and you'll miss the abscess
20:50got it
20:55gauze
20:57julie
21:03julie
21:04julie
21:05hey
21:05try to keep it together
21:06i'm sorry
21:07i keep
21:07i keep thinking about my
21:10they're
21:10they're 12 and 14
21:12and my exes
21:12okay
21:13okay
21:13just
21:13just
21:14just
21:14try to breathe
21:16okay
21:17pass sonny the gauze
21:23i'm at the wall
21:32urine
21:34what's going on
21:36i'm about to drain the fluid out of the lungs
21:38if it comes out as gray pus as i suspect then that means it's a localized infection and it can
21:44be drained
21:44and she can receive the heart
21:46correct
21:46and if you're wrong
21:48yeah it'll come back blood
21:50and you will have done all this for nothing
21:54better hope you're right
22:07okay
22:12what's next
22:14you let me call down to the or
22:17what for
22:18to find out what happened to tj
22:22dr coleman
22:24our friend
22:25the one whose parents
22:26are cops
22:28you remember him
22:37use that one
22:55operating room this is liz kwan
22:57liz it's dr larson
22:59what can you tell us
23:06okay
23:07can you call the icu when you know more
23:17he's losing circulation
23:21yeah they don't know if he's gonna make it
23:36what did you tell rosie's father
23:39did you not see the anomalous pulmonary vein?
23:42of course i did
23:43it's benign
23:45unless you put a new heart in her
23:46then you could have massive pulmonary hypertension
23:48never seen that complication
23:50maybe you should read last month's case reports in the lancet
23:53if you're so sure why don't you tell them that
23:54because i'm not going to take away all their hope
23:57we extend our life as long as possible
23:59and when the time comes
24:01we have the conversation
24:02well i'll let you be the one to take that on
24:05you break it
24:06you own it
24:33he isn't going to die
24:40this plasma phase is working?
24:42yeah just an hour until the blood's clean
24:44then the transplant
24:45and then we're out of here
24:45if they can get us the heart
24:48i mean how long do you think it's going to be
24:49before east side or eunos
24:51figure out that michael lied
24:53i thought you were the badass trying to calm me down
24:56no
24:57just tired and scared
24:59hoping to see my daughter again
25:01well
25:04that badass is still in there somewhere
25:08truth
25:12i kind of miss her
25:27i'm dr heller here for the heart
25:30it's a pretty gnarly situation over there
25:32uh oh yeah
25:34um but transplants in a completely different way
25:38i think i better give them a call
25:41sure
25:41uh best ask for michael hamda
25:44that's our cmo
25:45she's fifty percent of face five centimeters diving
25:48i thought the medication was supposed to slow this down
25:50what about the lungs
25:51whatever happens we'll deal with it
25:53but now we're in labor
25:54i have a neonatologist standing by
25:56dr hamda
25:56you're needed on the phone again
25:58it's a nurse from east side now
25:59i'm so sorry
26:01two minutes
26:01i promise
26:04uh huh
26:06right
26:07and you'll send me an email to that effect
26:13you guys are on the same page
26:15we're just waiting for the family to sign off
26:22little hiccup at east side
26:25any word on tj
26:27it's touch and go
26:34it's katie
26:40hey sweetheart
26:41dad i've been texting you
26:43i'm sorry nora's in labor now
26:45she's in labor
26:46it's okay
26:47the baby's fine
26:48well i haven't heard from mom
26:49i want to come over there
26:51no absolutely not
26:55sorry um
26:56there's just no way the police won't let anyone in
26:58so it's not over yet
27:00it's not resolved
27:01but it's contained
27:02and no one's gonna get hurt
27:03okay
27:03just trust me
27:05please
27:05okay
27:06have mom call me
27:07and keep me updated on aura
27:09love you dad
27:10i love you
27:12bye
27:34i heard rosie was back
27:36back and forth
27:38back and forth
27:38that's all we do
27:39i was very sorry to hear about your wife
27:42covid
27:45they wouldn't even let me in the room to say goodbye
27:48it was an awful time
27:52somebody told me you became head of the department
27:54yes
27:55i did
28:00you told us to wait
28:02with rosie
28:03you said it'd be better
28:05and she's had some good periods
28:07she's deteriorating
28:09and now we can't even get her in good enough health to qualify for a transplant
28:12if that's the direction you want to take
28:14it is
28:15it was
28:16till you talked us out of it
28:17i gave you the advice that i would have wanted
28:21as a mother
28:23yes
28:24well the cardiologist gave us his advice as a doctor
28:28maybe you should have stuck to that
28:39i think that's mine
28:41probably one of my kids
28:50amy
28:50amy don't do anything to rile him up
28:53i know you can hear those phones
28:58those must be our loved ones
29:00trying to get a hold of us
29:06you can talk to yours
29:08when i can talk to mine
29:11look the thing is
29:13rosie's stable now
29:14the heart should be here any minute
29:16and i get that you're never gonna let me go
29:18but you don't need all of us here
29:21you think i'm a monster
29:24i didn't mean to shoot your friend
29:27that'll matter
29:28when all this is over
29:41you
29:44time to get out of here
29:46you heard me
29:47go
29:48julie go
29:49go go go go go go go
29:51go what you want to hear
29:53i will see you on the other side
29:55you better go before i change my mind
29:56okay
29:58please
29:58please don't hurt them
30:00you don't want them to get hurt
30:01tell them to send rosie's heart up here
30:07we went in to say our last goodbyes and
30:10i know you all were counting on having that heart but
30:15we're having second thoughts
30:17we're sorry
30:18truly we're just
30:20we're having a real tough time with it
30:27i see you're all wearing crosses
30:30so
30:31i don't know maybe you notice this
30:35it's called a high
30:37it means life
30:40when i was a kid preparing for my bar mitzvah
30:43or the
30:43the rabbi told me a saying from the thalmud that
30:46that i never forgot
30:49whoever saves one life
30:50it's as if they saved the entire world
30:54every organ that your son donates
30:56will go to a different patient
30:58each one another life
31:01and with that all the generations have followed until the end of time
31:12please
31:18hey mommy
31:20how are you doing?
31:21can you hear me?
31:25what the hell is happening?
31:27she's tacky hypotensive
31:28what does that mean?
31:29her heart's not pumping strong enough right now
31:31if you back up we can work on it
31:32pulmonary wedge pressure's up to 20
31:34or two sets are falling
31:35neck veins dilated
31:36fluid overload
31:37left side failure
31:38you said she was stable
31:40something's wrong
31:42looks like she's losing oxygen
31:45teens, hope to go
31:48baby's having D-cells
31:49what does that mean?
31:50the umbilical cord's getting squeezed by the contractions
31:53he's gotta come out now
32:01i need that heart up here
32:03what the hell is taking so long?
32:04it just arrived
32:04we'll let you know when it's in the building
32:07it's here
32:08now what are we doing?
32:09do you have us under control?
32:10we're doing everything we can
32:11i never should have let that nurse go
32:13that has nothing to do with us, Alan
32:14you fix her!
32:17all teams go on my order
32:19where's dr heller?
32:22dr singh?
32:22thank you so much for getting back to me
32:26baby's crowning
32:26heart rate's 97
32:27dr honda
32:28who does the man have to talk to?
32:29who the hell is Cruz?
32:30i can't
32:31just tell jenkins to talk to him
32:37things are going to hell up there
32:39but we've got the transplant team standing by
32:40we've got Cruz again
32:43yeah we got the heart
32:44we sent it up with the transplant team
32:46we sent down the women
32:47you think i'm falling for that?
32:48we both know you're sending some ucs in scrubs
32:51give me someone i've seen before
32:53i want you to see the heart first
32:55he wants it with someone he recognizes him
32:57that's me tell him i'm going
32:58great
32:59i just got off the phone with rosie's old cardiologist
33:02you need to know what he said
33:26there's no way amy
33:28no way
33:34stay right there
33:42open the cooler i want to see it
33:44i can't open it without corrupting the heart
33:47don't give me that
33:48alex
33:50it isn't gonna work
33:54nothing we do now will save her
33:56what are you talking about?
33:57no
33:58she has abnormal blood vessels in her lung
34:00which aren't working at all
34:02that's happening because we delayed
34:04that's what it is
34:05this is exactly what dr larson thought would happen six years ago
34:08she saw thickening of the intimal lining of rosie's pulmonary arteries
34:12but the cardiologist didn't get how dangerous it would be
34:15no she never said that
34:16it's not gonna work
34:19it was never gonna work
34:20not now not then
34:22but she
34:22she lied
34:23for your benefit
34:24because she wanted you to have some hope
34:26it's because i'm not gonna take away all their hope
34:31okay she gave you those years with your daughter that you never would have had
34:34no
34:34i don't care what you say
34:36get the transplant team up here
34:37we're doing it right now
34:39you break it
34:40you own it
34:40we're gonna do it right now
34:42enough
34:43enough
34:44he has a daughter
34:45i have a daughter
34:47she has parents and people who love her
34:50how do you think they feel right now
34:52how do you think tj's parents feel
34:57is he even alive
34:59we don't know
35:04rosie's dying
35:06these are the last moments that you are ever gonna spend with her
35:11how do you want to do that
35:14blaming everyone around you
35:15or holding her hand and telling her that you love her
35:18you said you could save her
35:19we tried
35:21Alex we tried
35:22but you didn't say that then
35:23you didn't tell me that then
35:25because she lost her kid
35:31a few months before you walked in here with rosie
35:35she was suffering
35:36she was suffering
35:36and she was doing anything she could
35:37to keep anyone else from suffering the same way
35:41she knew you'd be furious with her later
35:43but she didn't care
35:44she was just trying to give you that time
35:45and she didn't want death hanging over you
35:50you were there?
35:51no
35:52but i know her
35:57and i know her heart
36:05pain changes people
36:06Alex i know that
36:10i know that this isn't who you are
36:14so please
36:16we can give rosie something to revive her for a few minutes
36:24to say goodbye
36:44can you still get that to someone else who needs it?
36:48we could try
36:51then go
36:55i swear i won't hurt them
36:56i swear i won't hurt them
37:27Oh, that's familiar, is I'm always in between, the pressure and the peace.
37:59Oh, that's familiar, is I'm always in between.
38:17Oh, that's familiar, is I'm always in between.
38:47Oh, that's familiar, is I'm always in between.
39:05I'm taking it all
39:08Cause this is a road I
39:12But I'll be alright no matter where it goes
39:18Even though I'm
39:22Walking on no stones anymore
39:30Anymore
39:34I'll find my way with my eyes closed
39:38I'll be safe even when the sun is low
39:44Trying to see our flow
39:49I'll keep my head above the line
39:53Believe the best even in the highest time
39:58Trying to see our flow
40:02And I'm no water
40:09And I'm no water
40:13And I'm no water
40:16And I'm no water
40:18And I'm no water
40:39And I'm no water
40:47And I'm no water
40:50And I'm no water
41:03And I'm no water
41:05I'm no water
41:18I got your messages this morning
41:22You'll see some texts from me.
41:23I love you no matter what.
41:24Please don't die.
41:25That kind of thing.
41:29I had a memory.
41:31What?
41:33Well, two small hits from the same memory.
41:37Me and Rosie's cardiologist having an argument.
41:42Wow.
41:43This can happen from acute trauma, right?
41:47Absolutely.
41:48Which means my brain is back online.
41:50In some ways, yes.
41:52More memories can happen now.
41:54I don't want to wait.
41:56I want you to put me in the tank.
41:58Amy.
42:00If I'd had my memories, none of this would have happened today.
42:03You don't know that.
42:04I do.
42:06The doctor that I was knew that Rosie wouldn't survive a heart transplant,
42:11but I did not see that today.
42:14Not until it was too late.
42:17I'm sure you think I should go home and rest,
42:19but home,
42:23home is the house where Michael lives with his new wife and baby.
42:29And half of me is still trapped in that time.
42:35And the other half wants a man that I don't even remember.
42:40I get you want Jake and to be the doctor you were,
42:44but you can't just decide.
42:46I am not deciding.
42:49Now I know that it's possible.
42:51I need all of it back.
42:55Put me in the tank.
42:58Please, Gina.
43:01Tonight.
43:02tonight.
43:033
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