- 1 day ago
Self defense instructor, author, and motivational speaker Avital Zeisler joins WIRED to answer the internet's questions about self defense.
Category
🤖
TechTranscript
00:00I'm Avital Zeisler, self-defense instructor, published author, and motivational speaker.
00:04I am here today to answer your questions from the internet. This is Self-Defense Support.
00:13Feroz is asking, what is the best strategy for strike and flee self-defense? When it comes to
00:18striking and fleeing, one of the most effective strikes is a push kick because it's targeting the
00:23groin, a vulnerable target. It's creating additional distance for you to escape, and it
00:28works very well for that strategy and that overall objective. I really want to show you
00:31this one, so let's go. So whenever it comes to striking for self-defense, I want to target a
00:36vulnerable area with a harder surface area on my body, and I want to strike through the target
00:42for maximum impact. So for the push kick, I'm driving the ball of my foot through the attacker's
00:47groin and creating that space. I'm also generating more power by bringing my hips forward. So let's
00:53do it. Are you okay? So that is your strike and flee tactic.
01:02Levitating loser, is it bullshit? Is shouting fire really more effective than crying rape at getting
01:08people to come and help? So I first want to say that you cannot rely on anybody to come and
01:13save
01:13you. You are your first and your last line of defense. That is why training self-defense matters
01:17so much. Now when it comes to the yelling fire instead advice, there is no clear evidence that using
01:22one word is going to help you over another consistently. But what's really important here
01:26is that you be loud, you be visible, and you be specific. For example, if I see somebody with
01:31the red shirt, I'm going to yell at them and say, hey you in the red shirt, call 911, because
01:35specific
01:36commands help people overcome their own hesitation. So as a general principle, be loud draws much
01:42attention to yourself because you will make that attacker think twice about targeting you.
01:46Illustrious Fan 7700. What do y'all do when you're being followed? If you are being followed, do not
01:53go home. You never want to give somebody information about where you live or any additional information
01:57that can be used against you later. What you do want to do is get to a safe location as
02:01quickly as
02:02possible. So this is a well-lit populated area, a grocery store, of course a police station. But when you
02:07head there, you want to prioritize your safety. This means creating as much distance as possible, even going
02:12to the other side of the street. If you have a self-defense device on you, get it in your
02:16hand
02:16ready to use. If you have a safety app, turn it on. I also recommend calling someone on speaker.
02:21And the most important is engaging your situational awareness. You have to see what's going on around
02:26you and also let that person know that you're aware of them because that alone might make you
02:31a hard enough target that it's not worth the risk for them. So if you sense that somebody is following
02:36you, if you can place your back against a wall safely to eliminate your blind spot and let them pass
02:41you, it's going to help put you in a better and stronger position because now they're walking in
02:45front of you and you're behind them. All right, this is from the self-defense subreddit. Is the
02:49kick to the balls effective in self-defense? A kick to the groin is very effective, but you have to
02:54understand that there are no guarantees. First of all, you cannot control how somebody is going to
02:58physically respond. You can't control pain tolerance. You can't control how adrenaline is going to
03:03affect them. So when you are targeting the groin or any target for self-defense, the real objective is to
03:09disrupt the attacker long enough to create that window to escape or to get ahead on your next
03:14defensive move. Of course, you just want to keep disrupting in any way possible strikes using
03:19objects. It's not about preparing a sequence of steps and hoping it's going to work under stress.
03:24It's about making sure that you lock in survival concepts and strategies that you can adapt with
03:29under stress. The Humboldt is asking what everyday item could transition into a self-defense tool if
03:34needed. I really want to demo this for you guys, so let's go. All right, any everyday object can be
03:40used to defend yourself with if it helps shield you, buy you time, disrupt an attack. A chair is a
03:45great
03:45example and a purse is also a great example. Here for the chair, it serves as a shield. It also
03:50helps
03:51create distance and worst case scenario is the last resort I'm able to strike with it.
04:01Okay, you get the point. One other thing I want to say is that any everyday object can also be
04:06dropped,
04:07it can be grabbed by the attacker, it could also be used against you, so you have to factor that
04:11into
04:11your training. Now let's talk about the purse. So from here, if I'm being attacked, I can use it
04:17to defend myself with. I can also grab it and I can strike somebody with it to help stun my
04:23attacker.
04:24Again, very great option if that's what you have on you, but like with anything in self-defense,
04:30you have to take time and practice using it so that under stress you have that muscle memory to use
04:34it. Combat SD Rob, using your keys for self-defense. Good advice or urban legend? All right, it's very
04:41common advice and I was given that too, but I no longer recommend it. When you use keys to defend
04:46yourself with, for example, I'm holding it here. I'm holding it here. I'm holding it here. There is a higher
04:50chance that you can injure your own hand rather than generate meaningful stopping power. What I
04:55recommend instead is actually getting a device that's specifically designed for your keychain
05:00or to have on you when you're in public that can help you disrupt an attack such as something like
05:04this. You can hold it and you can just do simple hammer fists. It actually looks like this. It's like
05:08the motion of banging on a door and it can help disrupt an attack and create that opportunity for you
05:13to escape. So make sure wherever you are that you know your local laws when it comes to devices
05:18and also practice it and then have it on you and easy to access when you need it. Otherwise,
05:22there is no point of investing in a safety device like this. We have a question here from Cora. Given
05:27your past experience, what's the most common tactical mistake people make when trying to defend
05:32themselves in a violent situation? I would for sure say hesitation and also trying to force a defense
05:40that has a specific series of steps instead of adapting to what they're actually facing in that
05:47moment. So if you know strategies that you can adapt with, it's going to let you be more responsive to
05:52what you're actually facing and seeing in the moment as opposed to being like, wait, it's supposed to go
05:56this way and then it doesn't. Then you freeze, you hesitate, you become slow. It lets the attacker have
06:02an advantage over you. There's a very big difference between self-defense that's more choreographed versus
06:07self-defense that's literally prepping you to assess your surroundings and implement strategies
06:14that you can adapt with. So what I have found in self-defense is that you have consistent reference
06:18points. For example, if somebody is choking you, there's not going to be a different way of choking
06:22you when it's a front choke with two hands on your neck. That is a reference point that you can
06:26have
06:27an expected reaction from, like how to release the choke. But from that moment on, you don't know how
06:31that person's going to react. That's why it's important to train concepts and phases that you can adapt
06:36with. For example, if I release that choke, I can disengage. If I want to stay and continue striking
06:41because I haven't disrupted them enough to create that window to escape, then I'll continue doing
06:45that. And when you have that mindset for survival, your expectations become way more realistic.
06:52Self-defense is messy, it's unpredictable, and all you really have under stress are strategies and
06:56concepts and tactics that you can adapt with. From the No Stupid Questions subreddit,
07:01why is pepper spray such a popular self-defense option? Pepper spray or pepper gel is a great
07:06option because it lets you defend yourself from a distance. It's also small and easy to carry.
07:11I personally prefer pepper gel because it reduces the risk of blowback, but regardless of which one
07:16you choose, you have to first make sure that it's legal where you live. You have to practice using it
07:20safely and you have to have it on you and accessible so that you're able to use it in a
07:23real-life situation.
07:25There are inert options to train with that don't have live spray in them, so you can actually practice
07:30practice using them. And it's good to practice in realistic scenarios. Pressure test yourself,
07:34getting it from your bag, having it in your hand. You want to go across the attacker's face,
07:38giving verbal commands, even integrating self-defense into it.
07:42Query Boyo. What is the best weapon or skill to have for self-defense as a woman?
07:46So I want to start by saying that the only attack you are guaranteed to survive is the one that
07:51you
07:51can prevent. That is why the best skill for a woman is not a weapon or a move. It is
07:56what's called
07:56situational awareness. Situational awareness means being more aware of your surroundings,
08:00but in a tactical way for survival. So this means taking notice of safe locations, exits, objects you
08:06can creatively use to defend yourself with, any security nearby. When you start practicing this,
08:10you are going to feel paranoid. That's very normal, but this really is a life-saving habit that I
08:15encourage you to start doing right now. I always advocate for people to take self-defense from the
08:20systems that I've been exposed to. I find that they all have value, but it's very important that you
08:24develop a survival mindset, situational awareness, and prevention protocol, and of course to pressure
08:29test defenses from best to worst-case scenarios so you really lock down those survival strategies
08:34and are able to take the pressure in a real-life situation. A Query user is asking,
08:38what should I do when someone tries to force me into their car? If somebody is trying to force you
08:43into their car, you have to do everything possible to intercept that attack because being taken to a
08:48second location is way worse. It reduces visibility. It increases risk. Strike, be loud. If you're close
08:55to the car, if you can push off of the car, you want to drop your weight. You have to
08:58be in that mindset,
08:59I am not getting into that car. I am not giving up. I'm fighting to disrupt and disengage and get
09:05to a
09:05safe location as quickly as possible. Water Kata is asking, most trash advice. 100 meter dash is the best self
09:13-defense.
09:13The goal of self-defense is to survive. And if your brain assesses under a threat that escape is
09:19possible, yes, run as quickly as you can. But I want to take this opportunity to say that fitness and
09:24staying in shape is also part of self-defense. You might have to keep fighting and defending yourself.
09:28You're going to be exhausted. And also you might have to literally run for your life. Heini 90 is
09:34asking how to break free when pinned against a wall. So when somebody is pinning your wrist against a wall,
09:39they are actually giving up their own arms. They're not striking you, they're not attacking you in any
09:44other way. It's a great opportunity for you to go after the groin because they are so close to you.
09:49Depending on your striking distance and your range, you can go for the knee, you can go for a shin
09:52kick,
09:53and then that's going to start to disrupt the attacker and let you start to move your body into
09:57a better position to do wrist grab releases, additional strikes, and to continue to defend yourself
10:02until you can create that opportunity to escape. If somebody pins your wrist against a wall,
10:07you have to act fast before they continue on with their attack. From here, the attacker has both
10:11my hands against the wall giving me a gift where in this moment I'm able to target the groin. So
10:17depending on your striking range, I can go for a knee, I can go for a shin kick to the
10:21groin.
10:22What I'm going to do next is slide my body over and get ready to do a wrist release if
10:28I need to.
10:29If it's safe to escape from here, I'm going to escape. If I need to continue striking, I have options.
10:34I can control here, I can continue to strike even more, and then create distance and escape.
10:46And that is how you break free when pinned against a wall. From Shakespeare, 06.
10:50If a woman is attacking you, example pushing you, yelling at you, hitting you, kicking you,
10:55or all of the above, is it okay to hit back? Why or why not? Self-defense is not about
11:00gender,
11:00it's about behavior and threat, and the tactics don't change. You are legally allowed to defend
11:04yourself, but you have to stop when the threat stops too. If somebody is attacking you, there's a
11:09chance that they can really hurt you, but you want to make sure that your response is proportional to
11:14the level of force that's being put upon you. From Adam underscore Sim, why does every American
11:20house in movies and TV have a baseball bat? Okay. So baseball bats make for great TV, but in reality,
11:28they have limitations. First of all, you have to be able to swing a bat towards a target. And in
11:34a home,
11:35there could be very tight hallways, small entry points. You might not be able to achieve your
11:40objective, and there's also the risk that the attacker can grab the baseball bat and use it
11:45against you. When it comes to home invasion and home safety, you have to look at it in the equation
11:49of
11:50prevention and then reaction. So prevention, home security systems, great neighborhood watch programs,
11:56even the simple habit of locking your door, which a lot of people accidentally don't do.
12:01And then you go into the reaction side. This is where I recommend investing in a self-defense tool
12:06or device that you're legally allowed to use, placing it in a consistent place in your home,
12:11out of reach of children, and then actually practice what you would do in an emergency situation.
12:15I also recommend always having your keys at your night table so you can hit the alarm and maybe scare
12:19someone off. But when it comes to where you're placing things, it has to be strategic,
12:23it has to be based on your actual home layout. And the more that you drill these scenarios,
12:28the more obvious it's going to become where a great place is for you to store that device.
12:32This is from Taskia. How do I break free from someone if they grab my hair or my body?
12:37So I'm going to highlight the hair grab defense. I get asked this question a lot,
12:41but it's better if I show you. Let's go. Again, you have to intercept this attack as quickly as
12:45possible because when somebody grabs your hair, they have control over your head,
12:49which has control over your body. So let's go through a common scenario where somebody's grabbing
12:53my hair. Immediately I'm getting into my base. I'm wrapping my arm around the attacker's arm.
12:59I'm putting pressure on the shoulder joint. I can dislocate the shoulder if I continue.
13:03If for some reason they're still holding on from here, I have options. I can close in,
13:08continue to attack, and even render him unconscious if I have to. But the priority is always
13:14to disrupt and disengage as quickly and safely as possible.
13:19And that's how you break free from a hair grab. NM010101. I want to learn how to improve my
13:26reaction time and reflexes. So improving your reaction time is actually about pattern recognition.
13:32This, again, is why it's so important to train defensive reactions from best case to worst case
13:37scenario so that your brain builds these action templates that it can access automatically under
13:42stress and let you actually adapt because self-defense, it's messy, it's unpredictable,
13:46and you have to train for that reality. Pickpocketing or grabbing your phone from your hands,
13:51that is obviously something that's happening a lot. Now this comes back to situational awareness and
13:57also prevention protocols. Of course, being aware of your surroundings, you might detect somebody
14:01targeting you, create distance, keep an eye on that person. Beyond that, to practice situational
14:06awareness, I always say cut the distractions. Get your phone away, lower input audio or cut it completely,
14:12because you need to be aware of what's going on around you. And that text message, that quick
14:17scroll on social media, checking your emails, it can wait because your safety is always more important.
14:21Now, when it comes to your belongings, if you have a bag, you know, close your zippers,
14:26put it in front of you, put your hand over it, and never leave your bag on the corner of
14:31a chair hanging
14:32off. If you are approached by a stranger, you have to be on high alert because it can easily be
14:37a setup
14:37to take something from you, to mug you. So practice situational awareness because it really,
14:42truly is life-saving. Curious Cat NYC 777. Urgent self-defense tip, how to get out of a chokehold.
14:49You know what? I'm going to show you this one. Let's go. From here, I have to intercept this as
14:54quickly as possible because I need to prevent myself from going unconscious. I get into my base
15:00for balance. If the attacker is putting even more pressure, I'm going to be shuffling with him,
15:05just enough to keep me on my feet so that I can release the grip. I'm doing that by creating
15:09this position, and then I'm twisting my body. I keep an eye on my attacker. I don't overturn so
15:17that I expose my back. But from here, if I feel like I can safely, I can disengage. Or from
15:24here,
15:25I release, I can strike. Depending on my height, if you can get a back hammer fist in,
15:31if I can close in for a kick to the groin. And if I have to close in and continue
15:35to defend
15:36myself from here, there are even more options like having to render him unconscious if needed.
15:42It all depends on the scenario that you're in, but the priority is to disrupt the attack and escape as
15:48quickly as possible. And one more time. And that's how you get out of a chokehold. From the martial
15:58arts subreddit, eye pokes, are they effective or just escalation? The eyes are very vulnerable and
16:03targeting them can be very effective, but you have to understand that when you're going after the eyes,
16:08they are considered a higher use of force because they can cause permanent damage. Targeting the eyes
16:12can escalate a situation very quickly. So this is definitely more of a last resort tactic to use.
16:17NYflow underscore. I want to learn how to overcome the freeze response in an emergency situation.
16:22So the freeze response is a normal survival reaction, but what we do in self-defense is we train
16:29what's called a pre-planned disruptor move. So this can be something as simple as stepping offline or
16:34getting into your survival stance because movement is going to break the freeze and the hesitation,
16:39not trying to think your way out of it faster. The question here is, when is it time to physically
16:44defend yourself? Self-defense is always a last resort, and I follow a response progression of avoid,
16:51diffuse, and defend. I first try to avoid the situation. If I can escape, I'm out of there. If
16:56I can't, I try to diffuse the situation. And if I cannot diffuse the situation, I am ready to defend
17:01myself as a last resort. But when the threat stops, you stop too. KKGray00, what is the best personal
17:08safety app? A great safety app is one that lets you share your live location and reach out to
17:13emergency contacts and emergency services with minimal taps. It's also important to not rely on
17:18tech to save you. Technology is about giving you options, but you have to rely on yourself
17:23as your last resort. So personal alarms, it has to be ready to use. It has to be loud enough.
17:28The
17:28objective is to disrupt the attack with a lot of noise and draw attention to yourself. That noise alone
17:34can, you know, disrupt the attacker and make him flee. It also draws attention to you, creating
17:38accountability for the attacker, and that alone might make you not worth the risk anymore. And
17:43in a split-second decision, you definitely want to know what your strategy is when you're getting
17:47attacked. So if you have multiple survival tools on you, you have to know which one is your go-to,
17:52or your fumbling and wasting time could actually be more dangerous.
17:55El Sancho 0093. Any tips on de-escalating a situation and avoiding a fight? When it comes to
18:02diffusing and de-escalating an attack, for some people, this might be letting go of their ego.
18:07For others, it might be overcoming social conditioning, for example, choosing their own
18:11safety over being polite. But when you're actively trying to de-escalate a situation, you want to
18:16protect your space and distance. What I recommend is, of course, not getting into like a full survival
18:21stance. What I actually do is what's called a hidden survival stance.
18:25Alright, so here's how I do my hidden survival stance, because when I'm trying to de-escalate
18:30a situation, I don't want to show that I'm ready to fight, but mentally and physically,
18:34I am getting ready. And it looks like this. I drive one foot back, so I'm already in kind of
18:39half of a survival stance. And my hands are coming up, and they're central, in case I have to do
18:45anything. I'm verbally trying to de-escalate the situation and calm the person down. But mentally,
18:50my survival mindset is on, and I'm ready to go into action if I need to.
18:54Okay, I'm trying to calm the person down. I'm trying to de-escalate. Instead of getting into a
18:58fight stance, and it's telling them like, hey, I'm ready to fight. For example, if they're harassing me,
19:03and they're ready to grab me. Here, I can even, you know, love gentleman surprise for a groin strike,
19:08and that might give me the advantage to escape quickly. So again, it's all based on situation.
19:14You have to train these concepts so that you can just react and adapt to what's being shown in front
19:20of you in the moment. I highly recommend this because if you do have to, you know,
19:25go into action to defend yourself, then you're also able to leverage what's called the element
19:29of surprise and hopefully get that advantage towards your safety. If you're getting attacked,
19:34you have a legal right to defend yourself. But once the threat is no longer active, you're no longer
19:40active as well. Because if you continue striking or, you know, going after someone, you take yourself
19:45from a defender to an aggressor illegally, potentially. So you have to be very mindful
19:50of the situation and stop when the threat stops.
19:54Anon underscore non underscore nom. What's your tried and tested way to get rid of a creep?
19:59If you're being targeted by anybody, you always want to go to that avoid, diffuse, defend protocol.
20:05When it comes to avoiding, the goal is to try to have them move on. So say that you're at
20:10a bar
20:10or they're approaching you or they're harassing you or not being respectful. This is where that
20:15verbal self-defense comes in. For example, if they say, hey, are you alone? You never admit
20:19that you're alone. You can say, no, someone is coming any minute now. If you try to diffuse
20:24the situation and they're ignoring you, you can always escalate your response by getting help
20:29or even causing a scene. And again, drawing attention to yourself is what's going to create
20:34accountability for that person. That might just be enough for them to move on. But if it continues
20:38to escalate, you know, you might have to get up and leave or even physically defend yourself if
20:43they continue to target you. But it's very important that once you notice that someone
20:47has targeted you, that you're always aware of where they are. And just because they might leave
20:52the establishment that you're in, you have to be on high alert like when you're going home because
20:56they just might be waiting for a better opportunity to catch you off guard. And as I always say,
21:01if you see something, say something because we have to work together as a community to keep each
21:05other safe. For example, going to the police station and filing a report because that report can be
21:09what helps save another person in the future. This query user is saying, what are some of the best
21:14self-defense tips for domestic violence? My father and brother hit me. How do I protect myself?
21:19I want to start by saying I'm so sorry for what you have gone through or are going through. And
21:24I
21:24hope that right now, as I'm reading this, you are in a safe location. There is absolutely no excuse for
21:30domestic abuse or violence, and you have to prioritize your safety. If you can get to a
21:35safe location and reach out to a trusted person, that is very important. And if you can also document
21:41anything safely, do that. There are also great helplines that can help you navigate your options.
21:46If you can, of course, go to the authorities and seek a protective order. And I just want to say
21:52that
21:52if you're in this situation, you are not alone, and there are great options and organizations that are
21:58there to help you. This is a question from Cora. What self-defense moves actually work when someone
22:03threatens you with a weapon? When you're defending yourself against a weapon, you have to understand
22:08that this is extremely high risk and you have to do everything possible to escape first. If you have
22:13to defend yourself, for example, if you have a gun being pointed at you, I'm redirecting the line of
22:18fire away from me while going to control the weapon and the arm and disrupting the attacker and then
22:24disarm. But if you can escape, for example, after disrupting the attacker, then do so. Another
22:29example with an edged weapon, the first phase is to redirect the blade away from you, control the arm
22:35holding the blade, disrupt the attacker, and then disarm. There's also the risk that that weapon can be
22:41let go of, it can go flying, and you have to factor that into your training. Do you escape first?
22:46Do you
22:46have to deal with your attacker first? Do you have to jump for the weapon first? All of this stuff
22:51has
22:51to be factored into training and there's a very high chance that you are going to get injured,
22:56but the goal is to try to protect your vital areas and again just get to safety as quickly as
23:01possible.
23:02This is a question from Cora. If someone is robbing you, should you toss your wallet and run the other
23:06way? So if somebody is robbing you, give them what they want because your life is worth more than any
23:12material object. But when you're doing this, try to be tactical and prioritize your safety. If you see
23:17the opportunity to escape to a safe location and you feel in that moment that throwing your wallet
23:22is going to help give you more time to get there safely, then yes, that can work. But as you're
23:27doing
23:27this, be ready mentally and physically to defend yourself because situations like this can escalate
23:33very quickly. A Cora user is asking, how important is it to trust your instincts when it comes to
23:38personal safety? I always say that your instincts and your intuition is like your internal alarm system
23:43going off and it's so important to listen to it, but it's very difficult for people to do because
23:48of factors like social conditioning or hesitation. But when you decide that your life and your dreams
23:55are worth defending, that is when you start to prioritize your safety and make your safety a
24:00non-negotiable. A very common example that I hear is when a woman feels the need to be polite,
24:05but she uses that pressure to override her instincts to leave the situation and get to safety. So when you
24:11train self-defense and you start to really strengthen that signal and listening to your instincts,
24:16that's what's going to help you prioritize your safety over any pressure that you're dealing with
24:21in a dangerous situation. This is it for today. I hope that this information is already helping
24:26making you a hard target. Thanks for watching. Self-defense support.
Comments