- 6 minutes ago
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:03From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source for news.
00:10This is The Daily Show with your host, Josh Johnson.
00:28Welcome to The Daily Show.
00:30I'm Josh Johnson.
00:31We've got so much to talk about tonight.
00:33Politicians somehow make podcasts even worse.
00:36Pete Hegseth has a thing for older men.
00:38And Trump declares victory prematurely, so now Iran's got to pretend to finish, too.
00:44So let's get into the latest updates on the war in Iran.
00:50Nothing bad can happen. It can only good happen.
00:54The war in Iran is everywhere.
00:56It comes up in financial news because of its effect on oil.
00:59It comes up in celebrity news, like when Chaperone's bodyguard made the Ayatollah cry because he looked at her.
01:07And now the war is even creeping its way into the weather.
01:10Our eyes right now, weather-wise, are in the Middle East because they have an unusual system that's developing.
01:17Going to be bringing heavy rain, possible tornadoes.
01:20They could be looking at some haboobs developing there.
01:30Excuse me, Al, what did you just say?
01:34Haboobs?
01:35Haboobs are developing?
01:43Al, be a professional, all right?
01:45Call them by their scientific name.
01:47Ha-brestuses.
01:52Am I the only one who doesn't know what he's talking about?
01:55And that's your latest weather.
01:57To be clear, I just learned something new.
01:59What exactly is a haboob?
02:04Thank you, Craig Melvin.
02:06Very brave to admit on live TV that you've never seen a haboob,
02:12let alone felt one.
02:15I'm right there with you, brother.
02:17All right, so what is it?
02:19It is a massive dust storm.
02:20If you remember Mission Impossible, Tom Cruise running after that storm, ahead of that storm,
02:27that's a haboob.
02:30See, now I get what you're talking about.
02:32I would understand the news a lot more if they told me what Tom Cruise movie it pertains to.
02:39I need them on the news like what America is doing here is like an impossible mission,
02:43like Tom Cruise in the movie Magnolia.
02:48So now we all understand haboob means sandstorm,
02:52so you can keep your minds out of the gutter.
02:54And just so you know, after the haboob, there will be a bukkake of rain coming in.
02:59These are all weather terms.
03:02But okay, aside from this dust storm developing into a voluptuous woman,
03:08how's the war going?
03:09President Trump in the Oval Office yesterday said he's already won the war.
03:14Well, I think we're going to end it.
03:15I can't tell you for sure.
03:19Um, you know, I don't like to say this.
03:21We've won this.
03:22This war has been won.
03:26You don't like to say you won a war?
03:30Isn't that why you fight a war?
03:33Be proud of yourself, Mr. President.
03:35You ended another war.
03:36And this is the one that you started.
03:39Like...
03:45That's like double points, you know?
03:47But you heard the man.
03:49We won this war.
03:49I bet Iran's begging for a ceasefire right now.
03:52Breaking news.
03:53Iran's state-backed media now says Tehran will not accept a ceasefire.
03:57The other Iranian official's quote is that Iran will end the war when it decides to do so,
04:01when its own conditions are met.
04:03Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
04:05You can't end the war.
04:07We ended the war, all right?
04:09You trying to start another war?
04:10Because I'll fight you and then I'll stop fighting you when I feel like it,
04:14because the war is over.
04:16You heard the president.
04:17We won.
04:18We're bringing the troops home.
04:19More than 1,000 additional troops from the 82nd Airborne Division are heading to the Middle East.
04:26They'll be joining thousands more Marines, sailors, and other American troops already on their way.
04:32Oh, shit.
04:35We're sending more troops?
04:37That doesn't sound like the war is over.
04:39This is very confusing.
04:40Should I or shouldn't I go to Times Square in my sailor outfit to kiss random women?
04:53Mr. President, I thought we won.
04:55We've won.
04:56Let me tell you, we've won.
04:59Of course we won.
05:00Those troops are obviously going there to help set up for the victory party, you know?
05:05You ever try to set up a bouncy castle with just 1,000 troops?
05:11Now, that's an impossible mission, like Tom Cruise and Jerry Maguire.
05:17And besides, 1,000 troops isn't even that many.
05:20It's actually the lowest thousands of troops you can have.
05:25If this war was really ramping up, the Army would need a lot more people than that, you know?
05:30They'd probably be trying to get new recruits.
05:32The U.S. Army making some changes to try and draw more recruits.
05:36The Army just increased the maximum enlistment age to 42.
05:40That's up from 35.
05:42Oh, shit.
05:44We're letting 42-year-olds sign up for the military now?
05:50They're going to have to change the name from Operation Epic Fury to Operation Why Does My Back Hurt?
05:56I must have slept on it funny.
05:59Because the likelihood of a 42-year-old being great at war is like any person being great with nunchucks.
06:07Some people will be good, but most are going to hurt themselves immediately.
06:13Bruce Lee? Incredible.
06:15My uncle? Concussion.
06:25Are we sure we won? It's not even a little close.
06:29It's not a close battle. They're totally defeated.
06:33I don't know what it is about you saying it a third time, but I believe you.
06:37All right?
06:37We gotta be winning this war.
06:39You wouldn't lie nonstop.
06:41You're the president.
06:51Look, according to People Magazine and apparently the U.S. military, 42 is the new 35, right?
06:58And that's probably all the soldiers we're going to need anyway.
07:01Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth announced an extension to bring back service members who refused the COVID-19 vaccine.
07:08We're extending this to make sure anybody that wants to take advantage of it has additional time to take advantage
07:14of it.
07:14Maybe you were waiting to see whether we meant it or not. We do.
07:18Oh, shit.
07:20That doesn't sound good.
07:22When the Secretary of Defense is telling you,
07:24I know you didn't want to take the COVID shot, but what about getting gunshot?
07:36So you gave people a deadline to re-enlist, and they didn't take it, and now you're still extending the
07:42deadline to get them back.
07:44You were not the one with power.
07:46I've been through this entire thing before.
07:48My ex left me, and I told her she'd be back in a week.
07:51And sure enough, a year later, I got a wedding invitation.
08:06So just to recap, the military is now trying to recruit middle-aged people and anti-vaxxers who don't even
08:12want to come back.
08:15As long as they're not trying to bring in anybody else, maybe we're winning this war.
08:20The Army also changing some regulations to let people enlist without a waiver if they have a single conviction for
08:27possession of marijuana or drug paraphernalia.
08:30Okay, this is bad.
08:33This is bad.
08:35We've been at war a month, and you're already down to stoners?
08:46This is like that Harold and Kumar movie, Mission Impossible 4, Ghost Protocol.
08:53We must be desperate, because I've never seen a pothead take a puff and then be like,
08:59I want to somebody up.
09:03I wouldn't even trust a stoner with any mission unless that mission is,
09:07you need to locate the ayatollah and tell him the greatest movie ever is Interstellar.
09:19I'm starting to think the war isn't won.
09:21And if we're still fighting, the Army's recruitment videos are going to get a lot more desperate.
09:27Great news, America.
09:28The president says we won the war.
09:31And now, for completely unrelated reasons, the U.S. military is lowering its standards.
09:36Because we need a f*** ton of troops.
09:39Under 18, we'll take you.
09:41Under 16, you're in.
09:4313 and Jewish, you're a man now.
09:45Mazel tov.
09:46Your grandpa will be so proud.
09:48And he'll be right with you.
09:49Because we're taking the olds now, too.
09:51Drug conviction?
09:52No problem.
09:53Just gave birth, we'll take you both.
09:56Two lazy eyes?
09:57You can be a pilot.
09:58Why not?
09:58Uncle Sam needs literally anyone.
10:01Disney adults, carnies, Trekkies, Canadians.
10:04Those grown men who are into My Little Pony.
10:06We'll take you, no questions asked.
10:09Even though we have tons of questions.
10:11We'll even take stoners.
10:13Whoa.
10:14How can it be middle and east?
10:18So head to your local recruitment center.
10:20In fact, screw it.
10:21Just go straight to that base in Qatar.
10:23And be all you can be.
10:25Or f*** it, just be.
10:27We'll take it.
10:30When we come back, we'll catch up on all the podcasts you're going to want to ignore.
10:33Don't go away.
10:53Welcome back to The Daily Show.
10:55The midterm elections are just a few months away.
10:58So to analyze all the campaign stories,
11:00we turn to Desi Lodic in our indecision, Analyzone.
11:09I'm Desi Lodic.
11:10Let's get into the indecision, Analyzone.
11:14Wait, guys, can we get rid of that hyphen?
11:18No.
11:19Sorry, the wrong...
11:20Never mind.
11:22The midterm elections are a few months away,
11:24and everyone knows the best way to reach young voters is through social media.
11:28That's why politicians like Senator Joni Ernst are cranking out content.
11:33And it's going about as well as you think.
11:35There is a McFlurry of folks that are rushing to the Golden Arches to feast on fast food.
11:43Paid for with food stamps provided by SNAP.
11:47It may sound crazy, but I'm not McRibbing you.
11:54Oh, Joni, Joni, Joni, don't do that.
11:57You've lost all your McDignity.
12:00Your kids are going to stop me talking to you.
12:03Also, nothing says, I've definitely been to McDonald's,
12:06like pairing the visor with vintage Chanel.
12:09So relatable.
12:11But, of course, the aging Republicans would struggle with social media.
12:15Democrats, on the other hand, also struggle with social media.
12:19I know I should sleep, but the voices in my head go...
12:25Sorry, I cannot hear you.
12:27I'm kind of busy.
12:32Honestly, how did you get that wrong?
12:35That's the Lady Gaga song that uses real words.
12:38But if you watched those cringe-fluencers and thought to yourself,
12:42I wish this was longer, then you're in luck,
12:44because politicians everywhere are getting into the podcast game.
12:47Take Tim Burchett, Republican congressman and King of the Hill character,
12:51who I'm sure has a podcast that delivers the gravitas and stature
12:57worthy of a U.S. congressman.
12:59Welcome back to another episode of Tennessee Talks.
13:02Today, I'm very much honored to be joined by my good friend Bobby Alloway,
13:07who owns Alloway's Hot Rod Shop.
13:12What?
13:13The Bobby Alloway?
13:16The owner of Alloway's Hot Rod Shop?
13:19Oh, no way, Burchett can top that.
13:22East Tennessee native, my good buddy Randall Turkey McNew.
13:26Turkey, thank you, brother, for being here.
13:28Well, thank you.
13:28Appreciate you so much.
13:30It's a pleasure having me.
13:31Yes, sir.
13:31And we got here, uh, Tater, his boy, who's with us.
13:38Oh, my, you got turkey and tater?
13:43Did their boy Green Bean Casserole have a scheduling conflict?
13:47What?
13:48I have so many questions.
13:49What is going on here?
13:51Okay, why is the guy in the suit in the lawn chair,
13:54and tater and turkey are in the high-back leather chairs?
13:58By the way, I love the wide shot.
14:00The camera guy's like, hey, you want me to crop out their bare feet?
14:02No, no, no, no, no.
14:03Stay wide.
14:06People come for the tater, but they stay for the toes.
14:17But Republicans aren't the only ones racking up tens of listeners on the Internet.
14:21The Democrats have their own lightning in a bottle.
14:24Andy Beshear, the governor from my home state of Kentucky.
14:28Make me proud, Andy.
14:31Hello, everybody, and welcome to the Andy Beshear Podcast.
14:34This is our pilot and first episode.
14:37To make sure that we provide that real show for you,
14:40we've made some ground rules.
14:42We call them the cast rules.
14:44Number one, be authentic.
14:47You be you, boo.
14:49Oh!
14:51Oh, God, you broke the rule while telling us the rule.
14:56Oh, nothing is less authentic than you calling someone boo.
15:01That's a word for black women and gay men in 2011.
15:07Why can't you just talk like a real human being?
15:10Number two, talk like a real human being.
15:14Yes!
15:15Yes!
15:16Do that!
15:17Show us you can do that!
15:19Now is the time for my Kentucky accent,
15:23where I talk about things that are going on that just aren't right,
15:28or in my accent, that just ain't right.
15:33New people thought Kentucky didn't have robot technology.
15:38Andy, you're the most popular Democratic governor in the country.
15:43People love you.
15:44I am begging you, end your podcast before people discover your podcast.
15:56Finally, let's move on from someone with no riz to someone with no riz.
16:01Ted Cruz.
16:03Ted Cruz.
16:05He hosts the most popular podcast by a Republican, and it's got everything you never wanted.
16:11When I was in high school, my, like, first date that I would take girls on was to James Coney
16:15Island.
16:16Right.
16:16And get, like, chili cheese dogs, because I can't stand people who are pretentious,
16:21and it's impossible to be pretentious when you've got, like, cheese dribbling down your shirt.
16:28Well, Ted, your shirt might have been wet, but I promise you, your date was not.
16:39Honey, no girl's going to go to second base with you when they just watch you go to third base
16:43with your hot dog.
16:48But if you thought hearing Ted Cruz talk was insufferable, wait till you hear him sing.
16:53A man's got a heart, hasn't he?
16:57Joking apart, hasn't he?
17:00Can a fellow be a villain all his life?
17:03All the trials.
17:05I know.
17:05I'm not worried about you after you retire.
17:07I know what you're going to do.
17:08Better settle down and get myself a wife.
17:11And, uh...
17:12You remember it.
17:13Life will cook and sew for you and come for you and go for you and go for you and
17:17nag at you.
17:18The finger, she will wag at you.
17:23Thanks for coming in, but we're going to go in a different direction.
17:27Thank you.
17:28You can go.
17:29You can go.
17:33I love how his co-host was like, okay, that was good.
17:36You can stop now.
17:37Oh, there's more?
17:37There's more.
17:38Okay, let's settle in.
17:40I just know karaoke bars put up photos of Ted Cruz the way grocery stores put up pictures of shoplifters.
17:47So, look, the midterms are only a few months away.
17:50If you're a politician looking to reach people and think you need to start a podcast, don't.
17:55Please don't.
17:56Please don't.
17:56Just don't.
17:57Just don't.
17:58Go out and connect with voters.
18:00Talk to people.
18:01And above all, don't forget.
18:04Talk like a real human being.
18:13Couldn't have said it better myself.
18:19Thank you, Jesse.
18:21When we come back, for Ken Miro to join me on the show, don't go away.
18:37Welcome back to The Daily Show.
18:39My guest tonight is a comedian, writer, and host of Mornings with Miro on Hot Night 7 and the Victory
18:45Light podcast.
18:46Please welcome the Ken Miro.
19:06Hey, man.
19:07Thanks for being here.
19:09Thanks for having me.
19:09Yeah, you are an absolute, like, powerhouse institution of talking in my ear.
19:18My kids say that, too, man.
19:19Really?
19:20Yeah.
19:20Everybody.
19:21My mother, my spouse, everybody is like, you talk too much.
19:24Oh, I wasn't thinking that.
19:26I'm more just being, like...
19:27You enjoy it.
19:28Yeah, I love it.
19:29I love it.
19:30Thank you.
19:30I need to hear that sometimes.
19:31Yeah, 100%.
19:32I need to hear that.
19:33No.
19:35I'm a huge fan of it.
19:37Sometimes I'll even hope that when I say the thing in my head, it sounds like you.
19:41Like, when I'm feeling extra confident, I sound like you.
19:44Yeah.
19:45In my head.
19:46Yo, what up?
19:47Yeah, I'm Josh.
19:48What's good?
19:49You see?
19:50That's perfect.
19:51That's it.
19:52From New York.
19:53So, I'm wondering, with Hot 97, with you taking over this show, there are a lot of people
19:58that are saying that it feels like New York radio again.
20:01You know?
20:02Yeah.
20:02What do you think it is that you're bringing that makes it, like, feel re-New Yorkified?
20:08I...
20:08You know what it is?
20:09I think growing up, listening to it as a kid, you know, growing up in the Bronx, listening
20:13into Hot 97 every day, you know, I'm an elder millennial, you know what I mean?
20:18This is, you know...
20:20It sounds like, yeah!
20:22How about my elder millennials?
20:24That didn't...
20:24It wasn't...
20:25You didn't have an iPod.
20:26You had an MP3 player.
20:28You know what I'm saying?
20:29And, you know, since I didn't have MP3 player money, you know, we were listening to the radio,
20:33which was a cultural, you know, touchstone.
20:35And going from being a kid, listening to it in the back of a car, doing things as a teenager
20:41that my mom would not approve of, that's why we're not saying it on the air, uh, to then
20:46being the guy on the mic is crazy.
20:49Yeah.
20:49It's like watching Superman save somebody and then being like, yo, Superman's like,
20:52yeah, yo, this cape.
20:53Yeah, yeah.
20:54You're the guy now.
20:55So now, knowing what you know, do you get on the radio sometimes like, stop doing that
20:59in the backseat?
21:02I leave the little hidden messages, man, on the side of the room.
21:05And I'm like, yo, stop, stop that.
21:06Stop doing that.
21:06Yeah.
21:07Don't call, don't talk to your mother like that.
21:08You know?
21:09So now in this, in this era that is, is so podcast heavy, what is it that you think radio
21:17provides for the listener that podcast doesn't?
21:20I think podcast is just like, it's very vibey.
21:24You know what I mean?
21:24It's just like a vibe fest.
21:26It's just like, if we just, if I just went up there and sat next to one of y'all
21:28and was
21:28just like, hey, what's up, man?
21:30How you doing?
21:31What'd you have for lunch, man?
21:32You know what I mean?
21:33Let's talk about it.
21:33And it's just, there's kind of like no real structure, unless it's Victory Life, baby.
21:38We got mad structure over there.
21:39Okay.
21:40Uh, but, you know, it's, it's kind of like this, where it's like, you know, you have,
21:43you know, you, you have a meeting, there's, there's production that goes into it.
21:48There's more, it's structured.
21:49You know, I thought it was going to be four hours of me just up there being like, yo,
21:54traffic on the FDR's bag.
21:55Yo, here's, yo, yo, yo, here's some new French Montana.
22:00I'm the Kid Merrill.
22:01And it's not like that at all.
22:02Actually, podcasting is probably a little bit more exhausting, because it's just going
22:06straight through, whereas radio, you know, you got a couple breaks here, you know, an
22:10insane caller that you got to dump, you know, you know, local law commercials, you know,
22:15things like that.
22:16Top dog law.
22:17Yeah.
22:19It's like, get greater than my brain.
22:21That's crazy.
22:21Top dog.
22:22Now, do you, when you are, when you're doing the show, are there calls that we haven't heard,
22:28because they're so insane, you can't air, can you tell us about one of them?
22:31Bro, I had a lady call in and say, uh, she said, Meryl, I love the show, man.
22:37I love the energy that you're bringing.
22:39My name is Casey.
22:40I'm from Brooklyn.
22:41But if I hear that mother Kendrick song one more time, I swear to God, I'm going to do something
22:46crazy.
22:47I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
22:49I was like, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait.
22:50What do you mean by that?
22:51Like, you know, when you say something crazy, what does that mean?
22:54Are you going to, like, mix mayonnaise and ketchup?
22:56Or are you going to murder somebody?
22:59Like, this, you know?
23:00But, yeah, no, there's been a lot of, like, and then also just people that, like, the
23:04earlier it is, the weirder it is.
23:06Because, like, the 6 a.m. callers are not, like, the 9 a.m. callers.
23:10No.
23:10That makes sense.
23:11That makes sense, because for them, I think there's a reasonable amount of time
23:16that a person will stay awake.
23:18And there's a reasonable amount of time a person will wake up.
23:20And I feel like the people who wake up super early, it's for three reasons.
23:24They either have to.
23:26Mm-hmm.
23:26They're on that, uh, made-up billionaire schedule.
23:31There's no way billionaires are actually doing it.
23:33Like, I just don't believe it.
23:34You have all the money in the world, and you get up early?
23:36You get up?
23:36No.
23:37That's not true.
23:38That's crazy.
23:38That is a lie.
23:39So it's either they have to for their shift at their job, they're billionaires, or they
23:45might be psychopaths.
23:46You know what I'm saying?
23:47Yeah.
23:48It's usually the latter.
23:49Yeah.
23:49You know what I'm saying?
23:50If you're calling into Hot 97 at 6 a.m.
23:52So when you, so when it's 6.02, and you see the call button...
23:57I'm like, yo, pick it up.
23:58Let's see who it is.
23:58Yeah.
24:00Hey, this is John from Brooklyn.
24:02I'm blind in one eye.
24:05The weather is terrible.
24:09Who are you voting for in the midterms?
24:11I'm like, yo, my man, we're on the radio.
24:14Like, this is, everybody's hearing this.
24:16This is not just, this is not, we're not pen-palling.
24:18Do you think it's because you, like, bring people in so well that
24:22they feel like they're just talking to you, even when they're on the radio?
24:24I think so, man.
24:26I think so.
24:26And I think, honestly, like, it comes from having strict parents and having to
24:31spin out of trouble, you know, by being charismatic.
24:34You know what I'm saying?
24:38So, making people feel comfortable enough to tell you, you know, yeah, yeah,
24:43I smoked crack before I got here.
24:44And I'm like, wow, you did not, you did not need to tell me that.
24:47I was, that was between you and your provider.
24:50Yeah.
24:50You know?
24:50So, it's a lot of you just taking sort of open confessions.
24:56Listen, I went to Catholic school.
24:58I was kicked out, you know, but now I know what the other side of the confessional booth
25:02feels like.
25:03Yeah.
25:04And they went to, like, seminary.
25:05You were just being yourself.
25:06I was just out here.
25:07Yeah, I went to the bodega.
25:08Yeah.
25:09Not the seminary.
25:10Yeah.
25:11And so, with Hot 97 being such an institution, when you come in, do you feel like there's a
25:16lot of new stuff that you want to do, or do you feel the sort of responsibility to uphold
25:21what people are expecting?
25:24A little bit of both, you know what I mean?
25:25Because there is, you know, people, like you said, like, oh, man, we made New York sound
25:29like, radio sound like New York again.
25:30And I'm like, thank you, guys.
25:32But there's also, you know, it's New York.
25:35Yeah.
25:35It's a very eclectic city.
25:37So, you know, you got rappers that are, you know, mainstream, and then you got some that
25:40are not.
25:41I was trying to just highlight New York as a city, you know what I mean?
25:44Have, you know, people, like, designers, like, just New York City kids, because I'm
25:50a New York City kid, so it feels good to me to kind of, like, uplift other people from
25:54the city and, like, kind of showcase them, because there's a lot of talent out here.
25:57Yeah.
25:57Absolutely.
25:59Well, you can.
26:04You being a New York City kid, right?
26:07And me having made 10 years living in New York.
26:12That means you get free health insurance, Trevor.
26:14Oh, that's good to know.
26:16Yeah, yeah.
26:17I had a request for you.
26:18At Penn Station, though, at Penn Station.
26:19Oh, health insurance at Penn Station.
26:21Yeah, from a random guy who's gonna...
26:22There's no health insurance at all.
26:25You're insuring the opposite of your health.
26:28I have a special request.
26:31I'm 10 years in New York, and I've never owned Tim's before.
26:36Never?
26:37Yeah, never.
26:37Not even in this...
26:38In this...
26:39What would they call it?
26:40A bomb cyclone?
26:41Yeah, yeah.
26:41No Tim's in a bomb cyclone?
26:42I...
26:42I bought some Tim's.
26:44Okay.
26:45And I'm hoping that you can show me how to tie in the New York way.
26:48Yes.
26:49Okay.
26:49Absolutely.
26:50100%.
26:51Right.
26:51Yes.
26:53Okay, boom.
26:55All right.
26:56So, you see how you have all of these...
26:59I believe they're called eyelets.
27:01Okay.
27:02You know what I mean?
27:02Yep, yep.
27:03You would think, I have to use all of these.
27:07You don't.
27:09You know?
27:10You just go across the first row, like that.
27:13Okay, okay.
27:13Let's see.
27:14The first row.
27:14Across the first row.
27:15All right.
27:16And you hold it up.
27:16Make sure it's even.
27:18Right?
27:18Okay.
27:19And then, you know, give me a number from one through four.
27:27One through four?
27:29Yeah.
27:31Three?
27:32Three.
27:32All right.
27:32So, let's go on the third eyelet.
27:35Let's go on the third one.
27:36Okay.
27:37Another one around.
27:39Okay.
27:40All right.
27:40And now, so now, we're just going to follow that pattern.
27:43We're going to skip.
27:44Oh, we're just going to skip.
27:45Okay.
27:46Got you.
27:46Wow.
27:47What if I had said four?
27:48You know what I mean?
27:50Then, you know, because realistically, you're not even supposed to tie these.
27:54You know what I mean?
27:55You're not demoing a house.
27:57You know what I mean?
27:57You're just standing in front of the building.
28:00So, you know, and the tongue has to be very elongated.
28:05You know what I'm saying?
28:06Right there.
28:08You know what I mean?
28:09Get it out.
28:10Yeah.
28:11Get it hanging.
28:12Get it hanging.
28:14Yeah.
28:15Okay.
28:15The less neat it looks, the better.
28:17Oh, really?
28:18Okay.
28:18Yeah.
28:19Okay.
28:19One second.
28:19Because you're supposed to buy them tight.
28:20It's how you show that you're a wealthy person in New York City.
28:22Okay.
28:23I buy one of these every season.
28:25And then, the tongue, is it true that the tongue's like,
28:28kind of like, you know.
28:30Okay.
28:30You know?
28:31You know when you're in the back of an Uber,
28:34you're real up.
28:36And you're breathing through your mouth.
28:37You're like...
28:40That's what the tongue should look like.
28:44Okay.
28:47Very relaxed.
28:49Got you.
28:49So, the Uber thing hasn't happened to me, per se.
28:54Not yet.
28:55Yeah.
28:56Yeah.
28:56Let me see.
28:56Okay.
28:56So, really, really, like, laid back.
28:59Yeah.
28:59You know what I'm saying?
29:03Okay.
29:06And this always stays on.
29:08You would probably think that this comes off.
29:09It does not.
29:09It's a badge of honor.
29:11Okay.
29:11You know what I mean?
29:12You could, uh...
29:13You write free whoever you know that's in jail.
29:15Oh, right.
29:17You could write whoever.
29:18Your girlfriend's name.
29:19Mm-hmm.
29:20You know, your dog.
29:21If I write my girlfriend's name,
29:22will they think she's in jail?
29:25Bonus.
29:26Bonus points.
29:27And also, shout out to you,
29:28because you got actual Timbs.
29:29The double-soled Timbs.
29:30Okay?
29:31Oh, yeah.
29:31Yes.
29:32That is very important.
29:34You know?
29:34You don't want to have the boneless Timbs out here,
29:36you know?
29:37Why are they called boneless?
29:39Because they don't have the...
29:40This is the bone right here.
29:41Gotcha.
29:42You know what I mean?
29:42And then this is just, uh, breading.
29:44Oh.
29:46So if I got the other ones,
29:48they'd be, like, nuggets.
29:50Yeah.
29:50They'd be a...
29:51It would be a McDonald's chicken nugget.
29:53Okay.
29:54With no sauce.
29:55Oh, jeez.
29:56So dry.
29:57No, yeah.
29:58Very dry.
29:58Don't do the single-soled Timbs, y'all.
30:00If you're here...
30:01If you came here to watch Josh do his thing,
30:03and you're on vacation in New York City,
30:08and he said,
30:08no, Tim Merrill said to buy some Timbs,
30:10don't do the single-bingles, okay?
30:11Get the double-soled.
30:12All right?
30:15Amazing.
30:17Thank you.
30:19Thank you so much.
30:20And so when I actually step into him,
30:23it's okay to just have the tongue out.
30:25Oh, I've spoiled the place.
30:27It's a mess.
30:27Let people see some ankle.
30:29Yeah.
30:29Show it off a little bit.
30:31Yeah.
30:31Roll your jeans up a little bit, you know?
30:33So this is about showing foot.
30:35Oh, yeah.
30:36Okay.
30:37It's very lucrative.
30:39Yeah.
30:39I didn't realize that.
30:40It's very lucrative.
30:40No, there's a lot of money in showing off feet.
30:42Hey, listen, I got five stars on Wikifeet, y'all.
30:47Oh.
30:48Well, thank you so much for this.
30:50This is...
30:51I got the knowledge now and everything.
30:54Thank you.
30:54Thank you.
31:00So you are a powerhouse advocate
31:03for Covenant House of New York and New Jersey.
31:06Can you tell people what Covenant House does?
31:10So Covenant House, shout out to Pam Sandonato.
31:13Covenant House is a charity that works with unhoused youth.
31:18Okay?
31:18So kids who are on the street, you know,
31:22have no place to go, essentially, you know, homeless.
31:25You know, really.
31:26I said unhoused because that's like the new cool way to say homeless.
31:29But, you know, homeless teens, basically.
31:31And growing up, you know, having friends who were in shelters, who...
31:36You know, and then being a teacher later on in life, you know,
31:40having students who would come in every day,
31:42and I'm like, damn, why are you so tired, bro?
31:44Like, why?
31:44And it's like, oh, I didn't sleep last night.
31:46You know, I slept in a shelter.
31:48Like, or I slept in a dangerous situation.
31:50Or I didn't sleep at all.
31:52So, you know, that kind of hits home to me.
31:55So them helping kids and teens kind of, like,
31:58get their feet under them, get housing, get education,
32:03get food, get the things they need to, like, you know,
32:05become productive members of society.
32:08You know what I mean?
32:09It's amazing, you know?
32:11So I do whatever I care for.
32:14Absolutely.
32:15Anytime, whatever they need, I got it.
32:17Thank you so much for coming on.
32:19Thank you so much for being here with me.
32:21Thank you.
32:24Thank you.
32:25Moise with Miro airs Monday through Friday
32:29from 6 a.m. to 10 a.m. on Hot Night 7.
32:32The Kent Miro.
32:34We're going to take a quick break,
32:35but we'll be right back after this.
32:37Thank you so much.
32:48That's our show for tonight.
32:50Now, here it is, your Moment of Zen.
32:52While many are making their way to their destinations,
32:55they'll see ICE agents walking around the terminals
32:57at Newark Airport.
32:59Oh, they're right there.
33:00All right.
33:01They're good to hear the help.
33:02They're not bothering nobody.
33:03As long as they can check my bags
33:04and get me on my flight, I'm good to go.
33:07Right?
33:08I want to get to the Bahamas.
33:10I want out of here.
33:12Sorry.
Comments