- 4 hours ago
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00:28He'll be with you today.
00:30Like he was with me at my dad's.
00:41305, 306 comments.
00:44This is a disgrace.
00:46People like this should be forced to pick her up with their own bare hands.
00:50Weatherfield's literally gone to the dogs.
00:53All of this is from your video?
00:55Yep. The community's loving it.
00:58I sent you a link to Five Holidays this morning.
01:01I could do this for a living.
01:02What, film people unawares?
01:04Exposing and unmasking miscreant behaviour in your postcode.
01:07I could franchise it out.
01:09It wasn't exactly criminal.
01:11Babe, you've seen the signs.
01:12No fouling on public pathways.
01:14Or leaving it on car bonnets, for that matter.
01:16But these deals won't be around for long.
01:19Where is it what you're thinking of going?
01:21Lisbon's the front runner at the moment.
01:23I want it warm, but not too warm.
01:26That's a...
01:27Four Star Hotel near the beach.
01:29Check out that view from the balcony.
01:31Wow.
01:32Hey, if he doesn't want to go, you can always take me.
01:34It was his idea.
01:35I fancy Porto, too.
01:37I want to see more of Spain.
01:38Yeah.
01:39Yeah, me too.
01:40I think I'd like to spend a month touring round.
01:43Bilbao, Galicia, Andalusia, Madrid.
01:47We should go together.
01:48Become lovers.
01:50Shall we get married?
01:51Never come back?
01:54Nothing.
01:58Oh, you're a lifesaver.
02:00Is that Lily's packed lunch?
02:01Yeah.
02:02Thought I'd make myself useful.
02:03Yeah.
02:05You're like one of them Japanese robots from that programme me and Shona try to watch.
02:11Oh, I'd love me own robot.
02:14Well, it might turn on you.
02:15Nah.
02:16Mine had to stay loyal.
02:17No matter how much I abused it.
02:20It's a bit dark.
02:24Adam's face yesterday.
02:25Oh, I know.
02:26I thought he was going to self-combust.
02:29You know, I struggle to picture him with Sarah.
02:32You don't fancy him, do you?
02:34No.
02:35As in.
02:36Good.
02:37Why'd you do it in the first place?
02:39Same reason you nicked Ben's rugby shirt.
02:41The reaction.
02:42Control.
02:45Like two peas in a pod, then, aren't we?
02:47Who told you I did that?
02:49Shona.
02:50Oh.
02:51Have you guys seen the Weatherfield community page?
02:54Er, no, because we've got a life.
02:56Right, well, you're not going to be laughing when I show you this.
02:59Oh, I hate funerals, babe.
03:01Gives me flashbacks to my da's.
03:03You said it would be a laugh.
03:04I said that to Steve.
03:06Well, no-one's forcing you to go.
03:08Well, it's a gesture of goodwill on behalf of this pub.
03:10Ah, is that what it is?
03:12Here's me thinking you wanted a day on the sauce.
03:14It shows the whole community we cure.
03:16They don't.
03:17They knew Jim MacDonald.
03:18And remember, you have got a hospital appointment this time tomorrow morning.
03:22Do not forget.
03:25Oh!
03:26Have I wandered into Manchester Airport by accident?
03:29Looks like that, doesn't it?
03:30I get pulled every time, don't I, babe?
03:32Mm-hmm.
03:32Honestly, they talk to me like I'm an actual criminal backing their instructions at me.
03:37As if everyone isn't tense enough as it is.
03:39Yeah, do you remember at Boston, on the way back from my uncles?
03:42They're extremely pleasant at Dublin.
03:44She is a cousin who works at Passport Control.
03:47Coleman, he's still there.
03:49You know, they're nice at Belfast as well.
03:51International on-city.
03:52Do you know what Coleman says to every passenger
03:55as he pushes their passport back over the counter?
03:58He says, welcome to Dublin.
04:00No matter where they're from.
04:01Unless it's England.
04:03That's not true.
04:05It costs nothing to show kindness.
04:07Says the woman who's given up smiling for Lent.
04:09Eva Price, who could be nicer than me, ma?
04:11What's all this in aid of?
04:13I've joined the Secret Service, ma.
04:15I ain't forgetting on Air Force One.
04:16I've got Steve's dad's funeral.
04:18What for?
04:19Moral support.
04:20You've only known that fella two minutes.
04:23Five minutes.
04:26And you're down to work today.
04:27I know, it's all right.
04:28I've swapped with him.
04:29Glenda's in this afternoon.
04:30That rota does not right itself.
04:33I know.
04:33I did it this week.
04:35Stephen didn't even like his father.
04:36Not that that surprises me.
04:38Why doesn't that surprise you?
04:39Because he was on the other side.
04:41Oh.
04:41Listen, whether Steve liked his dad or not,
04:43and no matter what persuasion the old man was,
04:45I can pay him a respect.
04:47Respect?
04:49Well, there's a word that's lost all meaning.
04:57Who's rattled her cage?
04:58If you'd like to step this way, Mr Driscoll,
05:01I'm afraid I'm going to have to do a full body search.
05:04And she thinks they're nice at Dublin?
05:09Why should you sit next to him?
05:10Because I knew Jim.
05:12He walked me down the aisle.
05:15He's my boyfriend.
05:17Well, you can sit in the row behind.
05:19How many rows are there?
05:20Well, it's a funeral car, not a cinema.
05:24Oh.
05:26They always look dead famous inside, don't they?
05:28Like Jackie Kennedy.
05:30Have you heard this?
05:32She wants to go in the car
05:33because she thinks she's going to look like Jackie O.
05:35Where's Dad?
05:37He's gathering his thoughts.
05:39I'm here, don't worry.
05:40I've not done a runner.
05:41Well, you look fantastic.
05:44You look like you're up in court.
05:46I've been in court for ages.
05:47Not like your dad, then.
05:49They gave him his own Bible.
05:50Is there any need?
05:51Come and just get along.
05:53Today, please.
05:55Yes.
05:56He'll be over in a flash, Dad.
05:57Before you know it, you'll be in the rovers with a pint in your hand.
06:00Is Andy definitely not coming?
06:02No.
06:03Mum says she won't speak to him if he does.
06:05She's still in shock and going.
06:07From what I've heard,
06:08there won't be a long line of well-wishers.
06:10Just the way it is sometimes.
06:12Do you ever wonder who'll be at yours?
06:15Hey!
06:15That's well morbid.
06:16My funeral will be packed to the rafters, unlike yours.
06:20As if.
06:21I've got loads of mates.
06:22Yeah, I mean, I'm sure the crack dens of Weatherfield will empty out for the occasion.
06:28We have literally just said, can we all get along?
06:30Yes.
06:30Can you just tell her, Stee?
06:33We're early.
06:34How about I make you some lunch?
06:35Oh, no.
06:36I think I could hold it down.
06:37Oh, poor thing.
06:41My mum had a full house at her funeral.
06:44Billy did that.
06:45Auntie Emily did a reading, do you remember?
06:47Yeah, you stormed out in the middle of it.
06:50Seems like a lifetime ago, doesn't it?
06:53Yeah, it does.
06:57And he stayed on the sofa all night.
07:00Oh, don't tell me.
07:01Don't tell me.
07:02James Bailey.
07:04Nothing happened.
07:06I saw them going home together last night.
07:09Well, whether anything happened or not, good luck to him.
07:11Well, Todd's a free agent now, isn't he?
07:15Yeah.
07:16Yeah, like I said, good luck to him.
07:19Same goes for you and all.
07:21Hmm?
07:21Yeah.
07:22Well, me and Todd, we don't wish each other any ill.
07:25Well, she'll look after him at home, won't you?
07:28Yeah.
07:29Sure she will.
07:38I thought of a maths exam fills me with absolute dread.
07:423am I saw his light on.
07:43Well, I say light, I mean the torch on his phone.
07:45He was doing a pass of paper in bed.
07:47Well, that's still two months away.
07:49I mean, you've peaked to, you've seen it.
07:50Well, I don't know why he doesn't come and stay with me for a bit.
07:52I mean, change the scene, you might do him good.
07:54I think he just wants his desk, you know, and all his books around him.
07:57Well, he could always bring his books.
07:59Oi!
07:59Oh, perfect timing.
08:02Eh?
08:03Sam.
08:04He was up all night with Isaac.
08:07I have tried speaking to him.
08:09Monosyllable-arama.
08:11You can train too hard for a race.
08:13Same thing with a mind.
08:14That's a longer conversation, I think, you know.
08:17Knowing a subject inside out never hurts.
08:18But sleep's crucial, especially at his age.
08:21Man, maybe I should take him to the peaks.
08:22He'd be a bit of fresh air and might put a calculator down.
08:25Good trail running up there.
08:27You could take those binoculars.
08:28Oh, I'd love to do a bit of birdwatching.
08:30In fact, me and my dad always promised ourselves that we'd get into that.
08:33I think you and your dad have done plenty of that.
08:38Er, talking of working too hard, I can't make our thing tonight.
08:42I'm snowed on you, I'm sorry.
08:45Never mind.
08:46Not when I'm not wanted.
08:48OK, so lunch, brunch menu.
08:51Starter and main £9.50.
08:52Light bite, £6.
08:54No courgette fritters.
08:58Come on, Tracy!
08:59How long does it take to change your shoes?
09:02Is Kevin not coming?
09:03Not in the mood.
09:05Tyrone?
09:05He's busy.
09:07Dev could have showed his face.
09:09I hope it goes all right today.
09:11Yeah, I'll second that.
09:13Cheers, guys.
09:13He one time called me a jumped-up little toe rag.
09:17Well, he was obviously a good judge of character then.
09:22Aye, aye. Here's your new beer.
09:25Thanks for coming, mate.
09:26You're caught in a dash.
09:27Not looking too bad yourself?
09:31I know today's going to be difficult.
09:33I'll be thinking of you.
09:36Sorry I'm late.
09:39We can go and make her.
09:40What?
09:41You know I'm bringing that fancy one.
09:43Aye, aye, boys.
09:44No squabbling.
09:45You going to barbecue?
09:46I couldn't find the one.
09:48Hey!
09:48Hey, I found you.
09:50I found your tie.
09:51Oh, where was it?
09:55Probably tied to her.
09:56I'm kinky.
09:57I see.
09:58Good luck, Steve.
09:59Thanks, Sal.
10:00He was a man.
10:03Well, we're all looking very smart.
10:06Cars here.
10:08Cars here!
10:09Oh, my God.
10:38That's a good idea.
10:39Cheers.
10:40Order of service?
10:41They don't want to see that.
10:42Did you get taxis back or...?
10:44Some of Jim's pals gave us a lift.
10:46Right, first one's on me.
10:48No, let me.
10:48No, no. Courtesy of the establishment. What's everybody having?
10:51I'll have a pint.
10:52Oh, are you still crying on the back of these with all our kids?
10:55Were there some nice hymns?
10:58We had Abide With Me, Holy Holy Holy and Danny Boy.
11:02Danny Boy? I don't think I know that one.
11:05Well, we're assuming Holy Holy Holy was ironic.
11:08Well, it's done now.
11:10Are these your mates, darling?
11:11Oh, yeah. Declan Davy.
11:14So, this is the Rovers' return.
11:17Finally.
11:19Glenda, will you finish serving these and I'll go and see about those sandwiches.
11:23Gentlemen, what'll it be?
11:31Hiya.
11:32I showed it back here.
11:33You done for the day?
11:35I've got another one at quarter past. Why?
11:37Are you not still stressing about that video?
11:41No, it's...
11:41It's not the comments. I couldn't care less what people think.
11:46I've got a manic ex-boyfriend out there, haven't I?
11:49If he sees that footage, he's...
11:51He's gonna know where I am.
11:53Right.
11:54He's not gonna, though, is he?
11:55Unless he's on Weatherfield's community page.
11:59It's hardly the go-to for psychopaths, is it?
12:02Well, I don't know. It probably is.
12:06I guess when you've been on the end of that kind of trauma, you...
12:09...you get paranoid.
12:11Yeah.
12:12I mean, I could text Adam.
12:14Ask him to take it down.
12:15Would you?
12:16Yeah.
12:17I'll ask him now.
12:20Thanks.
12:23I can't see how many people were there.
12:25Seventeen.
12:26Who was that bloke with the artificial leg?
12:28Huh.
12:29Long John Palmer.
12:31He's from one of the army bases that we used to live on.
12:34And he was mates with his son.
12:35That was before his accident.
12:36How did he do it?
12:38Gardening.
12:39What?
12:39True story.
12:40When he was on leave.
12:42Stone cold sober.
12:43Three spells in Northern Ireland.
12:45Two in the Falklands.
12:46And he topples over water in his geraniums.
12:50Never really knew anything about my great-grandparents.
12:53Ah, no.
12:54They were from Ben's neck of the woods.
12:55Well, Antrim.
12:57We used to go and visit when we were kids.
13:00Nah, it's a shame about your sister.
13:01Nice that she got a mention, though.
13:03Katie?
13:04Oh, she briefly came back from the dead.
13:06A checkered past.
13:07It's fair to say.
13:09Spent more time inside than out.
13:12Ah, maybe he wasn't a fan of Savvy Street.
13:14Not a fan of family life.
13:16Did he say that this morning?
13:17No, I'm just...
13:19surmising.
13:20Well, don't surmise.
13:21You hardly knew him.
13:23Ben.
13:25Excuse me.
13:31When are Vladimir and Estragon leaving?
13:34What?
13:35I don't know.
13:36Well, they're going to drink this place dry
13:37if you don't let them put their hands in their pockets.
13:40I know.
13:40I think it's one afternoon.
13:42You have an appointment tomorrow.
13:44You can't pitch up to that hospital stinking of beer.
13:47What's your problem?
13:48A man's dead.
13:49We're trying to mark us passing.
13:50Yeah, a man that you didn't even know.
13:53So what?
13:54I could do without the soreness.
13:58It was the salt and vinegar crisps were out of you.
14:01It was the steak and onion.
14:03Didn't I tell you that a thousand times?
14:10James Bailey?
14:11Ah, yeah.
14:12No.
14:13That's how long it took him to get over me.
14:15Nah, maybe they're just mates.
14:16And then George Shaw was rubbing it in.
14:19That's who they'll be talking about.
14:20All right, thanks a lot.
14:22See you now.
14:24And she's the one that's accused George of fraud.
14:27Hard to believe, but you never know.
14:29All those vulnerable women with the checkbooks out.
14:32Got to be tempting.
14:34Right, mate.
14:35That is me.
14:36There you go.
14:37It's good, that.
14:37Oh, champion.
14:38Listen, I'll catch you up.
14:39Yeah, all right.
14:45Making you pay, is he?
14:46The old handy Miss Chasey.
14:49Do you want to buy it?
14:50Oh.
14:52Mr Barlow's my solicitor.
14:54Ah.
14:55It's, er, Josh Haworth.
14:59Yes.
14:59I've known the cards for a long time, that scandal.
15:03You've heard the rumours?
15:04Oh, I've heard the rumours.
15:06He buried my mother-in-law.
15:08Oh, aye, she was into all that, erm,
15:10and all that, all that environmental.
15:11Oh, yes, we went with the cardboard in the end,
15:13but, er, he was spitting feathers,
15:16pushing the top-end coffins on me lass.
15:19He wants to know how much the old dear had left behind.
15:22You know?
15:22Trying to rob us of our inheritance
15:23just so he could shift a bit of mahogany and brass fittings.
15:26I think he should be wearing a mask and a strappy jumper, that lad.
15:29Same goes for his sidekick.
15:32Anyway, listen, good luck with it all.
15:34All right.
15:35Ta-ra.
15:35Ta-ra.
15:37Who was the one in the ridiculous cove?
15:40Oh, Samantha Falesworth.
15:43Well, actually, she was younger than me.
15:45Did Grandpa Jim grow up with her?
15:46Hmm.
15:47Well, they were just friends, but, er,
15:49if he had his way, there'd be more.
15:51He was not shy in that department.
15:53He was a lad, that's for sure.
15:55And a ta-ra with a saw-off shotgun.
15:57Holding up a bank to buy a pub.
15:59What?
16:00Building society.
16:01Like, dog day afternoon.
16:03Which pub?
16:06Oh, for the love of God.
16:08We said it to him at the time.
16:09You'll be getting yourself a reputation.
16:11A reputation?
16:13It was arm robbery.
16:15Still, it's a terrible thing, and then it looks like that.
16:17He was awful worried you and Andrew would get it.
16:20Yeah, well, we're all clear.
16:23What was it, now?
16:25Myotonic dystrophy.
16:26It's hereditary, but cos Dad doesn't have it, I'm all right.
16:29Ma, stay and say hello.
16:31Some of us have work to do.
16:34I can see who's the boss here, young Benjamin.
16:37She's got a face on her today.
16:39Sure don't they all wear it.
16:40Hi, hi.
16:41Anyway.
16:43To Jim McDonald.
16:44To Jim McDonald.
16:45To Jim McDonald.
16:45Jim McDonald.
16:49Oh, great.
16:50Should we go somewhere else?
16:52Don't leave on my account.
16:54How was it?
16:55At Grandpa's funeral.
16:56It was upsetting and emotional.
16:59Are you having a laugh?
17:00Sorry?
17:01Parading her around in front of Amy?
17:03Steve, sorry.
17:04Just kill me now.
17:05Wasn't in the stars.
17:06Yeah, and he does live here, you know.
17:07Hey!
17:08Lesser the lip lady.
17:09Sorry, what did you just say?
17:11I mean, it just wasn't meant to be.
17:12You are going near my daughter again, you've got to get past me, right?
17:16Enough!
17:16Enough!
17:17What's going on now?
17:18Steve, they're just kids.
17:20We've been leading her up the garden.
17:22Blah!
17:23Am I going to have to ask you to leave?
17:24Why?
17:25Do you want me to leave?
17:26Well, how would you like it if I talked to your son like that?
17:28Well, my son's dead, innit?
17:30I know he is.
17:31That's not what I meant, but have some respect for the living.
17:33Excuse me?
17:34Oh, listen, that came out wrong too, but come on, this is my pub.
17:36That's my boy.
17:41Brilliant.
17:43This place is just how Jim described it.
17:46Who fancies another?
17:52Did you not have anything on your date?
17:55Just a cup of tea and some almond cake.
17:57Just to let you know, soup of the day is one of my favourites.
18:00Lentil and red pepper.
18:01Oh, thanks.
18:02Oh, did you have a look at those links?
18:04What links?
18:05To the holidays.
18:08Well, well, well, if it isn't Hollywood's hottest double act.
18:12All right.
18:13Come on.
18:14You've had your fun.
18:15No, no.
18:15You had your fun.
18:16I just did my civic duty.
18:18Come on.
18:18He's asked you nicely to delete it.
18:20On your say so?
18:21She could do without being spotted.
18:24She doesn't want to be tracked down by an ex.
18:27Violent ex?
18:28Yeah.
18:28Well, you shouldn't have left dog waste on my new whip.
18:33He just said new whip.
18:35He did.
18:36By the way, there's only one beetroot salad left.
18:38Look, if he comes out of the woodwork and batters me cos of what you've done,
18:41then you'll be responsible.
18:43Actions have consequences.
18:45Oh.
18:46Just delete it.
18:50Well seen as you are so nicely.
18:56Gone, but not forgotten.
18:59All right.
19:00See you.
19:01Cheerio.
19:03I didn't think Amy would even go.
19:05Mild blood's blood, innit?
19:06It's a pity things got tetchy.
19:09It's just the pressures of the day.
19:11So Ben's got this appointment in the morning?
19:12Yes.
19:13So he's got to get up no matter what state he's in.
19:16Just popping out.
19:17Oh, babe, I like them leggings.
19:19Oh, yeah, I got on with that voucher you got me last year.
19:22Ha!
19:22Have fun.
19:23Night, ladies.
19:24Bye.
19:24See you now.
19:24Bye.
19:27So, she came to the bistro at lunchtime with Daniel,
19:30said she couldn't see him tonight because she was snowed under.
19:33And then the other night I heard her whispering sweet nothings to somebody on the phone
19:36and I'm telling you now, it wasn't Daniel.
19:38Well, who was it then?
19:39I've no idea.
19:41I mean, she might look like apple pie but I won't be surprised if she had somebody else on the
19:44go.
19:44Oh, stop it.
19:45What, another teacher do we think?
19:47Megan's lovely.
19:48We've known her for ages.
19:49Oh, yeah.
19:49Maybe it's that other PE teacher, Mr Saunders.
19:52Oh, lucky Megan if it is.
19:53Oh, maybe it's a caretaker.
19:54She's gone for a bunk up in his shit.
19:57Stop.
19:57You two are certified.
19:59I'm telling you, Eva.
20:00You heard it here first.
20:09Bit of peace and quiet, is it?
20:11Don't blame you.
20:13All that hullabaloo.
20:15Is it always so lively?
20:18Wee back water like this?
20:19Nah, it's sometimes quiet.
20:22You're familiar.
20:22No.
20:24Older.
20:24But familiar.
20:26Older.
20:27Listen to me.
20:28Are we all older than we used to be?
20:31I have one of those faces, maybe.
20:33I get it a lot.
20:35More in Manchester than home.
20:37How long have you been here?
20:39Months.
20:39And before that?
20:40Oh, before that.
20:42Other places.
20:44Belfast.
20:47You weren't at the funeral.
20:48You weren't at the funeral.
20:48I didn't know the man.
20:50His son is a regular, that's all.
20:51You were a pal of his.
20:53Who's now?
20:54Jim McDonald.
20:55You must have me confused.
20:58Margaret.
20:59Isn't it?
21:00May we Maggie, he'd say.
21:02The big secret.
21:04I don't know what you mean.
21:06And now, I better get back inside.
21:09He was a married man.
21:10You knew that.
21:11We're two young boys.
21:13Not that it was all your fault.
21:16Big dumb squatty like Jim.
21:18You know, I think I'd like you to leave.
21:19You were awful lucky nobody caught on.
21:22I'm assuming they didn't.
21:24Go.
21:25I'll not cause you any bother.
21:27The past is the past.
21:29And isn't there plenty of it?
21:31Yeah.
21:31You're right about that.
21:39Too much.
22:04I can't believe you're upright.
22:09You know, I'll go to hell rigmar pages.
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