00:04Wow, it looks like you're going to have a great night.
00:07Yeah, just having a few friends over for some drinks.
00:09Thank you for the invite, by the way.
00:11It's so funny you say that because I was just about to invite you.
00:14What about your girlfriend? I don't think she would approve.
00:16You're right, she probably wouldn't approve mainly because she doesn't exist.
00:19Do you know any beautiful cashiers in the area who might be interested?
00:21I actually do. And this one gets off at midnight.
00:25But she doesn't have your number.
00:27I think you should tell this beautiful cashier to call me when she's off.
00:30Is there anything else I can help you with?
00:31Yeah, why don't you just give me a box of those guys.
00:35What size would you like?
00:41I'm sorry?
00:43The condoms? What size do you want?
00:47Oh, just... give me the big ones.
00:50So do you want the Magneto Exo?
00:52You know, I actually tore right through those.
00:54The way they're manufactured, I'm just not a big fan.
00:56And if none of them are going to fit me anyways, I'd rather just have the regulars.
00:59Because I want something that's like a little bit comfortable with my body type.
01:02Lubrication wise.
01:03So we just go with the regular then?
01:08Yeah, I'll take the regular ones if I want to pass out from loss of blood circulation.
01:12I'm like Johnson.
01:13You're so funny.
01:15Thanks.
01:17Are you really sure that you even know what size do you want?
01:20I'm going to need something that's going to fit the tusk of a fully grown Sri Lankan elephant.
01:25Wait, an elephant you say?
01:27You know, I don't want to sound forward or anything, but maybe if you told me how really big it
01:31is, I can actually help you.
01:33Do you kind of know like six?
01:36Six inches from the ground maybe?
01:38Well, I'm on top of the Empire State Building.
01:42Okay, so what size is it?
01:43Are you familiar with like television remotes?
01:46Like an Apple television remote?
01:48Like two, three Apple television remotes if you were to like rubber band them, stack them on top of each
01:52other.
01:53Really?
01:53It's just a solid piece.
01:55Piece of what?
01:56It's like one of these guys.
01:58You brought a $5 foot loan?
02:00You guys don't carry XXXLs?
02:01And they didn't have any at the horse table that I usually get them at?
02:04No.
02:05You know, honestly, the more that I'm thinking about, the condoms don't even work in general with how big this
02:08guy is.
02:08So do you have any like garbage bags you could toss your boys away?
02:12I doubt it.
02:13Big enough.
02:13That's what I always say.
02:14That's what I said back in college.
02:15Big enough for what?
02:17Just an insane amount of pleasure, sweetheart.
02:18You know what I'm thinking about him?
02:20I'm thinking that extra small.
02:21Yeah, maybe if I was a friggin' baby in my mom's womb.
02:25Goo Goo Gaga type of bee.
02:26Okay, you know what?
02:27I'm sorry about all this.
02:28Can we just scratch literally all this?
02:29Here's what I want to do.
02:30Um, just give me the Magnum XLs.
02:32That's my final decision.
02:33I'm sorry about-
02:34Magnum XLs it is.
02:35Yeah, just Magnum XLs, so.
02:41Yeah, these should fit hopefully halfway down, so.
02:43I'll talk to you soon.
02:44Yeah, I'll call you when I'm off.
02:52Yeah, you're doing a great job.
02:54Keep up-selling these XL condoms because numbers are at an all-time low.
02:58So, keep making sure these guys are very insecure.
03:01Well, there's no way that he was bigger than a small.
03:03Yeah.
03:03I mean, come on, he's finite.
03:05Come on!
03:06Bye!
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