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00:01:29What better city to replace perfect boyfriend's long-term commitment and heartache with short-term happiness and superficiality?
00:01:37At least it seemed like a good idea at the time.
00:01:40Hmm. Well, fast forward a few years.
00:01:41It's a place where you can be just who you want to be
00:01:44You'll never see a beauty queen in a magazine
00:01:48Take a dip, take a sip of luxury
00:01:51Feel the spark of electricity
00:01:54It's a world where dreams are made
00:01:57In the heart of air
00:02:00Where the sun shines high
00:02:03The night's over the top
00:02:05In Hollywood
00:02:05In Hollywood
00:02:07In Hollywood
00:02:07Any time we want fun
00:02:10It's a time that's ready to play
00:02:12I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Dale.
00:02:23That's me a few years later
00:02:25Sucking face with my kind of sort of boyfriend, JP
00:02:28He's a fashion photographer
00:02:30Remember that cover of Charlize in the green evening gown?
00:02:33JP took that
00:02:34God, I'm already name dropping
00:02:37That's so lame
00:02:38Baby, give me your foot
00:02:40Uh, my foot?
00:02:42You ever have your
00:02:43Tall suck before?
00:02:46No, JP
00:02:47Oh, okay
00:02:49Mmm, manjara
00:02:52Mmm, delicioso
00:02:57Mmm, hmm
00:02:59What? No good experience
00:03:07Bye, baby
00:03:09Ah, Lord, I love this song, huh?
00:03:16He reminds me of being in Rome
00:03:17I wonder if toe sucking is big in Rome
00:03:21Ah
00:03:21Baby, you want a beer?
00:03:23The six pack, no?
00:03:25Huh?
00:03:27Baby, we have a good energy
00:03:28A good energy, me and you, no?
00:03:30Yes
00:03:30Come here
00:03:32Come dance with Poppy
00:03:34Me and JP have been together on and off
00:03:40For about six months
00:03:41It's going pretty good, but
00:03:43Sometimes
00:03:44I get the feeling
00:03:45I'm not the only girl
00:03:47JP's seeing
00:03:47Oh, JP
00:03:49Ah, no, no, no
00:03:50Are you there?
00:03:52Stay here
00:03:52It's Melissa
00:03:53JP
00:03:53This computer's broken
00:03:56It's a crazy joke
00:03:58Come out, come out
00:03:59Wherever you are
00:04:00No, I only have eyes
00:04:02For you
00:04:03Hey, JP
00:04:04Let's do that
00:04:06Big with the toes again
00:04:07Call me if you want to rendezvous
00:04:09Babe
00:04:09Bye
00:04:09Okay, baby
00:04:10It's no big deal
00:04:11It's my massage therapist, okay?
00:04:15That's a reasonable explanation
00:04:17Right?
00:04:22JP
00:04:23JP
00:04:25No more mozzarella, mama
00:04:27Since I moved to LA, I haven't really had a substantial boyfriend
00:04:36I seem to gravitate towards casual relationships of convenience
00:04:40Sometimes, though, I do wish for something more meaningful
00:04:44In Los Angeles, most people feel like they've never actually arrived
00:04:54There's always this chase for something bigger and better
00:04:58Consequently, no one puts down roots
00:05:01No one settles down
00:05:03It's like living in this state of perpetual vagrancy
00:05:07I want some roots
00:05:12At least I think I do
00:05:15Oh, my God, did he...
00:05:20Did you hear?
00:05:23Maybe
00:05:232012
00:05:242012
00:05:242012
00:05:252012
00:05:25There's this huge planet that is going to crash into Earth and kill everyone
00:05:30Oh
00:05:31You mean like the movie?
00:05:33No, I don't mean like the movie
00:05:36This is real, Dale
00:05:38The movie is based on the facts
00:05:42The planet is called N-D-I
00:05:46I don't know how he got his name and why it isn't six or eight
00:05:50But Seven is my colleague, roommate, and closest confidant
00:05:55And I don't think I'm outing him by saying Seven won't be taking any girls, Mom
00:06:00It's all over the internet
00:06:01I'm obsessed with it
00:06:02I can't stop reading
00:06:03It's kind of scary, don't you think?
00:06:12I mean, the end of the world, Dale
00:06:14I don't know if I can sleep tonight
00:06:17Bowie, you want to snuggle with me?
00:06:21Huh?
00:06:23I'm taking your dog
00:06:24And you just left?
00:06:42Yep
00:06:42So it's over?
00:06:43I don't know
00:06:45She says that every time and then she goes back to him
00:06:48Well, maybe I'm just being paranoid
00:06:49It was time for the bi-monthly breakup post-mortem
00:06:53Who said what?
00:06:54Did I handle it well?
00:06:55Et cetera
00:06:55Can I ask you something, JP?
00:06:57Hi, baby
00:06:58Come back to bed
00:06:59How many girls are you sleeping with?
00:07:01Baby, why you so drama?
00:07:03So what?
00:07:03So drama
00:07:04I mean, why would he hang out with me for six months?
00:07:08And text and call every day?
00:07:10Last night, I was trying to make this really good point
00:07:13We just had sex, JP
00:07:15It's good
00:07:16I just had your penis inside of me
00:07:20But that all sounded a lot better in my head
00:07:23Oh
00:07:25Last week bird crap, this week balls in her face
00:07:28That's typical
00:07:30Is it true he has a monstrous schlong?
00:07:32I don't know where she gets her information
00:07:34But that's absolutely true
00:07:36Okay, I don't understand the deal about big dicks
00:07:40I mean, they just hurt
00:07:41I mean, not that I've ever really experienced one
00:07:45Yeah
00:07:45Becca and Hallie are my two best girlfriends
00:07:48They're always game to listen to my problems
00:07:51And dispense useful commentary
00:07:52Toastuckers freaked me out
00:07:54I heard that he photographed Charlize
00:07:56Is that true?
00:07:57I mean, I love her
00:07:57She's like one of my favorite top five for sure
00:07:59Maybe I'm just being jealous
00:08:01Okay, how do you spell his last name?
00:08:03Becca
00:08:03What are you?
00:08:05Tell me you're not looking him up on the internet
00:08:06I personally think your dog is the biggest issue in your dating life
00:08:09What?
00:08:10Question
00:08:11Where does Bowie sleep?
00:08:13He sleeps in my bed
00:08:14Okay, but if the guy sleeps over
00:08:16Where does Bowie go?
00:08:18Um
00:08:18I guess he just stays in my bed
00:08:20Wait, what about fleas?
00:08:23More importantly, what about sniffing?
00:08:25Don't dogs sniff?
00:08:26Okay, okay
00:08:37You have a point
00:08:38Dating in general is difficult enough, Dale
00:08:41Uh
00:08:42What?
00:08:45Oh, no
00:08:46Becca, what?
00:08:49Okay, you know that German supermodel?
00:08:51Natasha Franks?
00:08:52Yeah, JP shoots her all the time
00:08:53What about her?
00:08:54Okay, I just read this
00:08:55It was on CMZ
00:08:56Okay, so Natasha Franks, German supermodel
00:08:59Recently has confirmed reports that she is three months pregnant
00:09:03Sources confirm that celebrity fashion photographer
00:09:06JP Gia
00:09:07Whatever his name is
00:09:08Is the father
00:09:09JP is well known as a Los Angeles savant
00:09:12And has been linked to several Hollywood socialites
00:09:14Stay tuned as the story develops
00:09:16I'm done
00:09:17I'm sorry
00:09:18I'm done dating men in this city
00:09:21I'm so tired of being a nice girl
00:09:23That always gets burnt
00:09:24Wait, wait, wait, wait
00:09:25I mean, this guy's a jerk
00:09:26No, I...
00:09:27Hey, Dale
00:09:30Hey
00:09:31Hi
00:09:32Zach
00:09:33Do you look...
00:09:34You look fantastic
00:09:35Oh, thanks
00:09:36I've cut my bangs
00:09:38Yeah, it suits you very much
00:09:39I knew Zach before he was a rock star
00:09:43He was the lead singer of this cool garage band
00:09:46Now he's got four Grammys
00:09:48And he's a shoe-in for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame
00:09:50But to me, he'll always be good ol' Zach
00:09:54Wow, long time to see
00:09:56Uh, this is my friend Hallie
00:09:58Hi
00:09:58And Becca, I think you've met Becca before
00:10:00Yes, uh, I've met Becca before
00:10:02It's good to see you
00:10:03Hi, nice to meet you
00:10:04Me too
00:10:05Wow
00:10:05Wow
00:10:06How are you?
00:10:07I'm sorry, I was actually just about to take off
00:10:09Oh, well, that's too bad
00:10:10But listen, my tour got pushed back a month or so
00:10:12So I'm gonna be around
00:10:13Oh, and hey, listen
00:10:15Tomorrow night my band and I are doing a little set at a hotel cafe
00:10:17If you guys want to come by, that would be great
00:10:20Yeah, sure
00:10:20I love your music
00:10:21Thank you
00:10:22Okay, maybe we will
00:10:23All right, well, just email me
00:10:25The address and...
00:10:26Yeah
00:10:26Oh, uh, I think the Paps have found you
00:10:31And, um, well, your girlfriend's kinda looking a little lonely
00:10:34Pictures
00:10:34Oh, well, that's actually not my girlfriend
00:10:36That's just a girl who's my friend
00:10:38Oh, right
00:10:39Mm-hmm
00:10:39Hey, uh, Cece, this is my friend Dale
00:10:42Hi
00:10:43Hey, nice to meet you
00:10:44I'm just gonna get my stuff
00:10:46Okay
00:10:46Um, yeah, well
00:10:47Don't forget to email me
00:10:48Well, don't forget to come
00:10:49Oh, my God
00:10:55Wait, so
00:10:56You guys all went to Catholic boarding school together?
00:10:58Yeah
00:10:59Okay, I can't, I can't imagine that
00:11:01We've known each other since we were 15
00:11:04I know, and I'm actually the oldest
00:11:06It's pretty safe to say that Jill's obsession with aging and getting married in due time
00:11:11Started back in Catholic school
00:11:13And, specifically, our first communion
00:11:15We got to walk down the aisle like many brides could be
00:11:19Comparing prettiest dresses and fanciest bows
00:11:22This is where Jill got programmed to plan for the next time
00:11:26And she would walk down the aisle dressed in white
00:11:28Oh, that's fine
00:11:30Oh, that's fine
00:11:30Oh, that's great
00:11:31You are getting married
00:11:37A little toy here or there never hurt anyone
00:11:39Plus, it comes with that carrying tape
00:11:43Oh, right
00:11:44That is such an inappropriate gift
00:11:46What, you're saying you don't masturbate?
00:11:48Um, no, personally, I don't masturbate
00:11:50I find it to be a little bit unholy
00:11:52Wouldn't you agree?
00:11:54Jillian, thank you, I love this
00:11:55I love you, home
00:11:56So, have you talked to JP?
00:11:59No
00:11:59I mean, he called twice, but
00:12:01Hey, I heard you saw Zach
00:12:03Oh, yeah
00:12:05I saw his video on TV the other day
00:12:07He looked so good
00:12:08Did you guys make plans to hang out?
00:12:10No, we just caught up for a second
00:12:12He was with a girlfriend
00:12:13Okay, what a joke
00:12:18What?
00:12:19You look like you either have to pee
00:12:21Or you're about to explode with gossip
00:12:23You would?
00:12:23Which is it
00:12:24Okay, I already told Becca
00:12:26But since you asked
00:12:27Girls
00:12:29You can just tell me later
00:12:30Stacey, I'm so sorry
00:12:31To spoil your special little moment
00:12:33But I have a huge announcement to make
00:12:36I'm getting married
00:12:38I'm getting married
00:12:39I'm getting married
00:12:41I'm so gorgeous
00:12:42Do you love it?
00:12:45It was the most amazing night, you guys
00:12:48It's not that I don't
00:12:48I don't want to just be your girlfriend anymore
00:12:50It's not that I don't
00:12:51It's not fair
00:12:52I can't take this limbo
00:12:54I know
00:12:54Marry me or you leave me
00:12:56It was the most romantic night of my life
00:12:59What can I say?
00:13:01He's the best
00:13:02You've got to be kidding me
00:13:10Drew?
00:13:11I'm sorry, but he was hitting on me
00:13:13Less than two months ago
00:13:14Okay, he wasn't hitting on you, Hallie
00:13:17He was flirting with you
00:13:18Guys are allowed to flirt
00:13:20It's a human condition
00:13:21It's natural
00:13:21Plus you think everyone is flirting with you
00:13:23I don't know
00:13:24I just think it's weird
00:13:25If a guy is ultra flirtatious
00:13:26And in a committed relationship
00:13:28And not to mention that he's in the business
00:13:31Men in the entertainment industry are instinctively douchebags
00:13:34No?
00:13:35No, I like Drew
00:13:36I don't think he's a douchebag
00:13:37Well
00:13:37Who came up with the term douchebag anyway?
00:13:40It's kind of disgusting
00:13:40But Jill wants to get married
00:13:42Just to get married
00:13:43Because she thinks it's time
00:13:44Hallie
00:13:45You couldn't even possibly relate to Joe
00:13:47And why is that?
00:13:48Because you're rich?
00:13:50I mean, seriously
00:13:51Everything's handed to you
00:13:53And you can buy whatever you want
00:13:54So, just buy a boyfriend
00:13:56What?
00:13:58Are you acting right now?
00:14:00Because this is hilarious
00:14:01I just want a rich boyfriend to take care of me
00:14:04Is she really just saying that?
00:14:05Did Jill tell you guys
00:14:06That she didn't get picked up
00:14:07For another season of Babes and Barflies?
00:14:09Her agent told her
00:14:10It's because she's too old and too fat
00:14:11That's not funny
00:14:14Seriously
00:14:15I was on a callback like two days ago
00:14:17And the producer told my agent
00:14:20That my butt looked big in a bikini
00:14:22There are specific trigger words
00:14:24That cause me to temporarily tune out of the conversation
00:14:26And Becca just triggered three of them
00:14:29Producer, callback, agent
00:14:30It makes me space out for like 30 seconds
00:14:33And it's okay
00:14:35As long as I return back in time
00:14:37To assure Becca
00:14:38Her butt is perfect
00:14:40That is crazy, Becca
00:14:41You're perfect
00:14:41Don't listen to that
00:14:42Exactly
00:14:43Douchebags
00:14:44As bad as they sound
00:14:46It's not like my friends
00:14:47Or the people of Los Angeles
00:14:49Are any more narcissistic
00:14:50Or self-serving
00:14:51Than the rest of the world
00:14:52It's just that
00:14:53No one cares to hide it
00:14:54At all
00:14:55Do you know how many married men
00:14:57Hit on me in a week?
00:14:58No, tell me
00:14:59Well, I don't really know
00:15:00The exact number
00:15:01But it's freaking high
00:15:02At least this is what I tell myself
00:15:03Come on, guys
00:15:04Let's go
00:15:05All I know for certain
00:15:07Is that dating in this place
00:15:08Sucks and I'm done
00:15:09Thank you
00:15:10I'm serious
00:15:11I'm done
00:15:11You guys don't hate me
00:15:13But I might, uh
00:15:14I might pass on going out tonight
00:15:15What?
00:15:16No
00:15:16What?
00:15:17No, you are going
00:15:17You just got out of a crappy relationship
00:15:20And you are single
00:15:21Plus, you're our designated driver
00:15:23Thanks a lot for the guilt
00:15:24Going out in LA
00:15:31Isn't quite like it is
00:15:32In any other city
00:15:33Because of the whole
00:15:34Who's who factor
00:15:34That this place revolves around
00:15:36So unless you're an A-list
00:15:37B-list
00:15:38Or C-list celebrity
00:15:39Work in the A-list arena
00:15:41Or you're a friend
00:15:42At the club promoter
00:15:43Slash door nazi
00:15:44Then, yeah
00:15:45It's pretty much impossible
00:15:46To get in
00:15:46Bottom line
00:15:47There are three major questions
00:15:48In Hollywood
00:15:49Who are you?
00:15:50What do you do?
00:15:51And who are your friends?
00:15:52If you are not on the A-list
00:16:06Leave
00:16:07Uh, honey
00:16:08Not in my club
00:16:09Natural hair colors only
00:16:10Anthony
00:16:12Oh, hi
00:16:13Of course
00:16:14Come on in
00:16:15Great
00:16:16Jonathan's working the door
00:16:17Son of these
00:16:18We're full
00:16:19Seven
00:16:20Really?
00:16:21You went in my club?
00:16:22I texted you
00:16:23Three times last week
00:16:25Three times
00:16:26Is your phone broken
00:16:26Or your thumbs?
00:16:27Okay, look
00:16:28We're on the list
00:16:29Here
00:16:30You see that?
00:16:31Let him in
00:16:32You totes owe me something
00:16:34Nice
00:16:37Natural
00:16:37Looking good
00:16:38Uh, uh
00:16:39Brent Michaels is waiting
00:16:39Down over there
00:16:40And you, darling
00:16:41Sunset Strip is that way
00:16:52It's the biggest
00:16:54You've ever seen
00:16:55Hey, Jamie did him
00:16:56Sick
00:16:57You're wild
00:16:58Jamie, bro
00:16:59You don't want his floppy seconds
00:17:00Are you kidding me?
00:17:01They call him her for a reason
00:17:02They check out the old dude
00:17:04And the cougar
00:17:04Sweetheart, I'm sorry
00:17:05There's been some kind of misunderstanding
00:17:07There you go
00:17:07Huh
00:17:08How many times do I have to tell you?
00:17:10I only date girls
00:17:11Twenty-five and younger
00:17:12I'm sorry
00:17:13Oh my god
00:17:16Is that David Spade over there?
00:17:18That would be hot
00:17:19God, this town is so disgusting
00:17:22Oh my god
00:17:23Guys, check this guy out
00:17:25That's the producer that I met the other night
00:17:26He's so hot
00:17:28I'm well-connected
00:17:29Oh
00:17:30I guess I'm under my wingman
00:17:32Uh-oh
00:17:35Don't look over there
00:17:38Oh, you've got to be kidding me
00:17:44I'm gonna go to the bathroom
00:17:46I'm-I'm just
00:17:48You know
00:17:48Don't look over there
00:17:50Oh, ah
00:17:50Jake?
00:17:53Dad, baby
00:17:54What are you doing here?
00:17:55Well, let me guess
00:17:56Baby's mama?
00:17:58You just called me a baby?
00:18:00Jakey, she didn't just call me a baby
00:18:02Now, did she?
00:18:03What?
00:18:03Don't screw with me, slut
00:18:04Excuse me?
00:18:06You don't know her, do you, Jakey?
00:18:08Yes
00:18:08Uh, baby, this is Dad
00:18:10Well, not anymore, you don't
00:18:16Bye-bye
00:18:19This is my first bitch slap
00:18:24But seeing the look on her Botoxed face
00:18:26You deserve him
00:18:27Totally makes it worth it
00:18:29I like
00:18:30And he's gonna put me in this next movie
00:18:35But isn't he kind of old?
00:18:37Aren't you gonna have to, you know
00:18:39Do him?
00:18:40Probably
00:18:40Oh, God
00:18:42If I have to stand here and listen to this bimbo yap about the blowjob she'll have to give to get a movie part
00:18:46I'll pee my pants
00:18:48Um, excuse me
00:18:49We're in line
00:18:52Um, actually, you're at the mirror, which doesn't really constitute the line
00:18:57Whatever, just go
00:19:01It's fine
00:19:02Ew
00:19:05And ick on you
00:19:07I'll give you my number, and then, you know, maybe we can hang out sometime
00:19:18You wanna give me your number?
00:19:19Yeah, sure
00:19:20Totally, cool
00:19:21Yeah, we'll just bypass the whole little coffee thing
00:19:23Yeah, right
00:19:24That's the software
00:19:25Yeah, I know
00:19:26Oh, gosh
00:19:29Oh, gosh
00:19:30Hola
00:19:31What?
00:19:34No, I didn't pee on my hands
00:19:36Yo, Mama
00:19:41Hey
00:19:42Hey, did you see Zach?
00:19:43He's over there in the corner booth
00:19:44Uh, no, I didn't see him
00:19:46Did you see JP?
00:19:47Yep
00:19:47I saw him
00:19:49He looks really hot tonight
00:19:50Did you talk to him?
00:19:52Did you just say he looks hot?
00:19:54Sorry
00:19:54That was really tacky, wasn't it?
00:19:57So, what's the deal with you and Zach?
00:20:00Have you guys ever hooked up before?
00:20:01Zach?
00:20:02Yeah
00:20:02Uh, no, not really
00:20:05Seriously?
00:20:06Yeah, seriously?
00:20:07Why are you asking?
00:20:08I just can't believe you've never hooked up with him before
00:20:10Yeah, well, I mean, we've hung out a lot
00:20:12But, no
00:20:13Well, if you were telling me you're just gonna leave him to the uneducated models of LA
00:20:17Then I am gonna have to jump his bones
00:20:19For both of us
00:20:20So, are you an actor?
00:20:27No, no, no, no, no, not really
00:20:28I thought I was for a minute, but turns out it's not for me
00:20:32Way too much self-analyzing
00:20:33So, what do you do now?
00:20:36I design jewelry
00:20:37These are mine
00:20:38They're very nice
00:20:40Thanks
00:20:40Oh my gosh
00:20:42Is it here?
00:20:42It's here
00:20:43What?
00:20:43Zach's magazine was named number one in their hottest men alive issue
00:20:47Yes
00:20:47Can I process that?
00:20:48Oh, come on, are you kidding?
00:20:50Come on, Cece, it's Zach's magazine
00:20:52Yeah
00:20:52It's not exactly
00:20:53It's, you know, it's very good
00:20:55Wait, you're leaving?
00:20:56Yeah, where's Becca?
00:20:58She was a producer
00:20:59Maybe she gets home okay
00:21:03Okay
00:21:04Bye
00:21:05I don't need you to excuse me for one second
00:21:13Hey, hey, Dale
00:21:14Hey, Dale
00:21:16Hey, hey, Dale
00:21:18Focus back, Zach
00:21:19I'll hold him up, Zach
00:21:23Come on, let's go inside for a minute
00:21:25Please
00:21:26Yeah, it doesn't make any sense to me sometimes
00:21:29Listen, I didn't get a chance to talk to you
00:21:32I wanted to, uh, see if you wanted to go to dinner next week
00:21:34Um, I, I can't
00:21:36I didn't even give you a day
00:21:38Well, I, I'm sorry, I know, I'm just
00:21:40I'm slammed right now
00:21:43Working in this retarded dating reality show
00:21:46Okay
00:21:48Well, I mean
00:21:49Look, if you're not too busy
00:21:51Then maybe, uh, you can make about my show with the label next week
00:21:53We can hang out after that
00:21:54Yeah?
00:21:56Yeah
00:21:56You didn't exactly make that show you promised you'd come to the other night
00:21:59Oh, I'm, I'm sorry
00:22:01It's okay
00:22:02I totally forgot
00:22:03Hey, you know what?
00:22:05Next week, though, for sure
00:22:05Okay
00:22:06Good, because
00:22:07You had me a little bit worried there, you know
00:22:11It's not like you to just drop off the grid like that
00:22:13You're my L.A. comfort food, you know
00:22:15I need to see you every so often
00:22:16L.A. comfort food
00:22:18I like that
00:22:20I'm sorry
00:22:23It's just been one of those months
00:22:24You know
00:22:26That photographer, JP, and I
00:22:28Right
00:22:28We were sort of dating on and off
00:22:30And then I found out that he got this supermodel pregnant
00:22:33And I mean, I didn't even want to come out tonight
00:22:35And I ran into them
00:22:37And I just
00:22:38I don't know
00:22:40I just can't hit the Hollywood scene anymore
00:22:42It's just
00:22:43It's not for me
00:22:44I didn't even know you were dating anyone
00:22:46I thought you were, I thought you were single
00:22:47Well, slightly single
00:22:50I mean, it was never anything fully committed
00:22:52Well, breakups are always pretty tough
00:22:57Yeah, I just don't get this town
00:23:00Everyone is always on the search for the bigger, better deal
00:23:04It just
00:23:04Yeah, but you know it's all about hype, right?
00:23:07I mean, at the end of the day, that's all it is
00:23:08It's hype
00:23:09Well, yeah, but it's different when you're famous
00:23:12You're part of something better that people are searching for
00:23:16But I am the exact same person that I've always been
00:23:19I mean, I'm not in this business for the hype
00:23:21Hey, Zach!
00:23:23Come here!
00:23:25Come on, I got it
00:23:26Am I going to be on the cover of a tablet as your newest squeeze?
00:23:32I think I can handle that
00:23:33Oh, I'm so sorry
00:23:39It's okay, I like a good headbutt
00:23:41I was...
00:23:41I was...
00:23:42I went to kiss her cheek in the...
00:23:44I am such an idiot
00:23:46He was clearly going for the lips
00:23:48Okay, well, have a good night
00:23:51Thanks, bye
00:23:52Bye
00:23:52Seven and I work in a production company
00:24:00That cranks out crappy reality shows
00:24:02Our job is to find and cast a quote-unquote talent
00:24:06Such as it is
00:24:08So, just be natural and forget that the camera's even here
00:24:11Oh, well, I'm very comfortable in front of a camera
00:24:15So, why don't you tell me how you and Bert met?
00:24:18I'm sure that's a great story
00:24:19We met on the internet
00:24:21Now take these two
00:24:22They're here for a slot on the upcoming show, Geezer Town
00:24:25Some people will say or do just about anything to be on TV
00:24:29A blue pill a day makes your lady wanna stay
00:24:33Hey, Dale
00:24:37Oh, oh
00:24:39Seven
00:24:40There's a call for you online, too
00:24:42Oh, really?
00:24:44Um, I'll be back in just a second
00:24:46This is Dale Squire
00:24:52Dale, it's Becca
00:24:55Can you come pick me up, please?
00:24:57Yeah, but what's wrong?
00:25:00I'm up to a heating
00:25:01Just take a sauce, take a laugh
00:25:03Okay, I'll be there in two seconds
00:25:04You don't wanna leave this in there
00:25:10That was Becca
00:25:11She was crying
00:25:12I don't know, I gotta go pick her up
00:25:14I'll be back in 20 minutes
00:25:16Can you cover for me?
00:25:17With the phone's texting cyberspacing 80-year-old couple
00:25:19Yes, please
00:25:20They're kinda scaring me
00:25:21Yeah, yeah, yeah, go
00:25:22Thank you
00:25:24Three, two, one
00:25:31Oh, please
00:25:32Thank you
00:25:34Hey
00:25:40What happened?
00:25:46Becca, what happened?
00:25:47What's wrong?
00:25:49What happened?
00:25:49You have got to be kidding me
00:25:53I just don't understand
00:25:55I mean, you got a boot six months ago
00:25:57How does someone get a boot on their car twice?
00:25:58Unless in a year
00:25:59Every Monday
00:26:00I have to get up and move my car before 9 a.m.
00:26:049 a.m.
00:26:05And?
00:26:07Sometimes I forget, okay?
00:26:10On days like this, it's really helpful to remember that Becca donates blood,
00:26:14rescues puppies, and volunteers at the local soup kitchen
00:26:16How much?
00:26:19980 dollars
00:26:20980 dollars?
00:26:22Yes
00:26:22It's okay, you know what?
00:26:24We'll get the money
00:26:25Love is alive
00:26:43Alive like a newborn child
00:26:47Love is a war
00:26:50Broken and running wild
00:26:54Love is a thief
00:26:56And I'm stealing our hearts tonight
00:27:03And you give it to me
00:27:10Give me all of you
00:27:14You're all I see
00:27:17You're all I want is to be
00:27:22Can you take
00:27:23I love you!
00:27:25Take me away
00:27:26Wow
00:27:29He is good
00:27:30I know, right?
00:27:32He looks so different
00:27:33I don't think he's as clean as he used to be
00:27:35Clean?
00:27:36He's got that whole grungy rock star thing working for him
00:27:40You can say that again
00:27:41Hey Jill, where's Drew tonight?
00:27:46Oh, he had a movie screening
00:27:47And then he's going out with the guys
00:27:49Because he's so excited about the whole engagement
00:27:51Yes, he's so excited
00:27:53And I decided that I don't want a long engagement
00:27:55So we set a date
00:27:56September
00:27:57Oh
00:27:58That's great
00:28:01Don't you think that's a little quick?
00:28:03Uh, no, Holly, I don't
00:28:05I'm pushing 30, okay?
00:28:06You just tell me how it feels when you get here
00:28:08I'm 25, Jill
00:28:10It's not like you're 100
00:28:11Yeah, count me out on this one
00:28:13Well, my agent told me never to divulge my real age
00:28:15So I really can't participate in this conversation either
00:28:17And you both smell like desperate whores
00:28:20Thank you
00:28:21Thank you
00:28:26Thank you all for coming
00:28:27Thank you very much
00:28:28Hey
00:28:31You made it
00:28:32Hi
00:28:33That was incredible
00:28:35That was amazing
00:28:36You think?
00:28:37Yeah, you know everyone, right?
00:28:39Yeah, definitely
00:28:39Lovely ladies of LA, of course
00:28:41And Seven, how are you?
00:28:42Much better now that you're here
00:28:43How are you?
00:28:43Good
00:28:44I'm gonna go to the bar
00:28:51Anybody want a drink?
00:28:52You guys want to join?
00:28:53Sure, why not?
00:28:54I'll stay
00:28:54Will you get me another Jack and Coke?
00:28:56Yeah, sure
00:28:56Okay
00:28:57Hey
00:28:58Hey
00:28:59Hey
00:29:00Hey, where did Dale go?
00:29:06Oh, she went to the bar
00:29:07Oh, well, Cece, this is Hallie
00:29:09I didn't get a chance to introduce you guys the other night
00:29:11Uh, no, it's nice to meet you
00:29:12Same
00:29:13Oh, this is my girlfriend, Dominique
00:29:15So, um, when are you practicing tomorrow, when are you going to solve?
00:29:20Oh, but Cece works A&R for our tour manager
00:29:22So everything's got to get the thumbs up from her
00:29:25Well, I'm easy
00:29:26I mean, well, not kind of easy, you know
00:29:28But with a voice like his, you can't do much wrong
00:29:30She's, uh, she's cute, I say go for it
00:29:35You're in trouble, you know, that's Cece
00:29:37What? I'm afraid you're going to fall in love
00:29:39Hold it
00:29:43Hold it
00:29:44Okay, you have got to stop it with the winks
00:29:51She winks?
00:29:52All the time
00:29:53Becca is a winker
00:29:55Becca's a wanker?
00:29:57No, not a wanker, a winker
00:29:58She winks
00:29:59I only do it to the guys that I think are cute, okay?
00:30:04It's for this movie I'm doing
00:30:05It's a character role
00:30:06So what do you guys do at Apple?
00:30:09Uh, home
00:30:10Yeah, I gotta work early in the morning
00:30:12Whoa, whoa, lame, lame
00:30:13Excuse me, can I have, uh, can we get six tequila shots, please?
00:30:16Pop shell?
00:30:17Yes
00:30:17Oh, no
00:30:18No, that is trouble
00:30:20I puked
00:30:20I'll clean it up
00:30:22Oh, God
00:30:24Uh, can't you stop lucky you even got her out?
00:30:26She's always in bed by 10 p.m
00:30:27Maybe it's just one night
00:30:29Uh, I would, but I really should go
00:30:33Me either
00:30:34I'm interviewing wedding planners in the morning
00:30:36I have an audition at night
00:30:37I'm casting
00:30:38I'm free
00:30:39Okay
00:30:40Yeah
00:30:40Okay
00:30:41Well, um, I'll let you all stuff up this one time, okay?
00:30:45But next time
00:30:45You're staying
00:30:46All of you
00:30:47Staying
00:30:48Good job
00:30:48Bye
00:30:48Yeah
00:30:49Have a good day
00:30:49Bye
00:30:50Bye
00:30:50Bye, guys
00:30:50I don't mean to be rude, but
00:30:54Can I get an autograph?
00:30:56Oh, yeah, sure
00:30:56Thanks
00:31:01I'm a big fan
00:31:03Thank you
00:31:04Wow, that is a lot of tequila
00:31:07Oh, yeah
00:31:09I'm just letting you know now that tequila and I are a wild mix
00:31:11Things might get silly
00:31:13All right, but only if you do a wraparound
00:31:19Go like this
00:31:22Just once
00:31:30And I'm not going to let you put your penis in my ass either
00:31:33It's an out-hole, not an in-hole
00:31:34Why are you being such a prude?
00:31:36I'm not being a prude
00:31:37I'm just not a porn star, okay?
00:31:38Now it's our lack of sex in front of everybody
00:31:41I just had the wedding on my mind
00:31:43Oh, surprise
00:31:44The wedding, which you haven't had any input in, BTW
00:31:47BTW, Jesus
00:31:49It's because I work and I don't sit at home eating chip and dip and obsess over the wedding
00:31:55What?
00:31:55Yes, it is disgusting what you're doing
00:31:57It's a pig
00:31:57I'm a pig
00:31:58Hi
00:31:59Hi
00:31:59Hi
00:32:00Are you guys okay?
00:32:02Yeah, we're good
00:32:02We're just here working on our calves
00:32:04Hey, hi
00:32:05Well, that's, I know
00:32:07Who was that?
00:32:07That's, uh
00:32:08That is, uh, a client
00:32:10Jill
00:32:11God
00:32:12Yeah, right
00:32:13Back off
00:32:13Yeah, right
00:32:14That's what it is
00:32:15Everything
00:32:16Jill calls our engagement to Drew
00:32:18A match made in heaven
00:32:19Watching them squabble about wedding cakes
00:32:22And the medicinal benefits of anal sex
00:32:24I couldn't help but think that heaven has a strange sense of humor
00:32:27I'll call you later, okay?
00:32:29Okay
00:32:29Okay
00:32:30Come on, Bowie
00:32:31Bowie?
00:32:32Terrible, man
00:32:33Listen
00:32:34I, I, I want to try it
00:32:35It's just one, one little
00:32:36Just one time
00:32:37No!
00:32:41You know, that camera looks very good on you
00:32:43Oh, you think?
00:32:45So what are you going to do with these pictures?
00:32:46I don't know
00:32:47You know, maybe you sell them on the internet
00:32:48Make some money off your ass
00:32:50Album cover, my man
00:32:52I'm telling you
00:32:54Want some?
00:32:56Oh, no, no, thanks
00:32:56I'm cool
00:32:57You smoke too much, Jivers
00:32:59Way too much
00:33:00What?
00:33:01It's all natural
00:33:02Oh, organic
00:33:04No chemicals
00:33:06Is this new?
00:33:08It is
00:33:09It's about a girl
00:33:11Is it about?
00:33:14That blonde?
00:33:15Blonde?
00:33:17No
00:33:17No blondes
00:33:19There ain't no words that I could say
00:33:24Cause words would just get in the way
00:33:29But it is written in the wind
00:33:35This is where it all begins
00:33:42I've been dreaming you to last
00:33:46I've been hoping every night
00:33:52Now you're wanting me to stay
00:33:57Keeps getting better every day
00:34:01Keeps getting better every day
00:34:03Every day
00:34:05And I'm so happy I could cry
00:34:09I think about it all the time
00:34:15Yeah
00:34:16Yeah
00:34:17I'm so happy I could cry
00:34:21I just can't get you off my mind
00:34:28I found a reason for living
00:34:31I found a reason for loving
00:34:36I found a reason for loving
00:34:37See you later
00:34:38I'm so happy I could cry
00:34:42So how is Jill's wedding coming along?
00:34:45It's pretty good
00:34:46There's a bit of drama though
00:34:48Wow, drama and a wedding
00:34:50It's shocking
00:34:51Yeah, well Jill wants this, you know
00:34:53Chapel filled with 8,000 red roses
00:34:56And some like $80,000 wedding dinner
00:34:59And $7,000 wedding dress
00:35:01And her dad won't cover the entire tab
00:35:03Wow, I'm very glad that I'm not Drew right now
00:35:05Or her dad
00:35:06Yeah, but that's just Jill, you know
00:35:08We love her for it
00:35:10She's extravagant
00:35:10You know what?
00:35:11I've known her since I was 11
00:35:12We went to boarding school together
00:35:14Wow, you went to boarding school when you were 11
00:35:16Did you miss your parents a lot?
00:35:18Yeah
00:35:19Um, it's complicated
00:35:21When did you get home to see him?
00:35:23Well, on the holidays
00:35:24Or, you know, the occasional odd long weekend
00:35:26No, I liked boarding school
00:35:29It was what I needed
00:35:30How do you mean?
00:35:34My parents died when I was a kid
00:35:36I've told you that, right?
00:35:39No
00:35:39No, I'm very sorry
00:35:41I didn't know that
00:35:42How did they die?
00:35:44Together?
00:35:46No, they actually died separately
00:35:48Um, my dad was when I was five
00:35:50My mom's when I was 11
00:35:51Oh, no, no, no
00:35:55It's
00:35:56It's not sad
00:35:57It was
00:35:58A really long time ago
00:35:59I just don't talk about it much
00:36:02Because
00:36:02Um, what about your parents?
00:36:08They're still together, right?
00:36:10Still together
00:36:10Yeah
00:36:11After 30 years
00:36:13They're totally in love with each other
00:36:15It's amazing
00:36:15Oh, you can get that
00:36:19No, no, no
00:36:20That's okay
00:36:21But you can get that
00:36:23Sorry
00:36:24Oh, it's Hallie
00:36:27Just two seconds
00:36:28Hey
00:36:29Um, yeah
00:36:31Yeah, yeah, yeah
00:36:32I'm still here
00:36:33Um
00:36:36Sure
00:36:37That's fine
00:36:38Wait
00:36:41You didn't really just do what I think you just did, did you?
00:36:44Because
00:36:44I kind of had plans to just spend the night with you
00:36:47Um, she's outside
00:36:48How did she get my address?
00:36:50I don't know
00:36:51Not for me
00:36:52No
00:36:52Door's open
00:36:55Hi
00:36:56Dale said she was coming by to shoot the band today
00:36:59So I thought I'd surprise you
00:37:00Hey
00:37:01Hey
00:37:02We actually finished a couple hours ago, but, um
00:37:05Really?
00:37:06Yeah
00:37:06I wanted you, uh, to sit back down
00:37:10You're not
00:37:10Yeah
00:37:11No, I know
00:37:12I'm sorry I'm lame
00:37:13But I have to work in the morning, so
00:37:16You should see the show she's casting
00:37:17It is so funny
00:37:18Look, you can stay
00:37:19Have another beer
00:37:20Oh, I'm sure we'll do it some other time
00:37:22But I'll see you guys later
00:37:23Look, just
00:37:24One, one second
00:37:25All right, Mr. Zachary
00:37:29Um, I'll text you tomorrow
00:37:30Why are you leaving?
00:37:33Because I have to work tomorrow
00:37:34And you're just gonna leave me with your friend, isn't it?
00:37:37Hey, Zach, where's your corkscrew?
00:37:39Okay
00:37:40Okay
00:37:41She just showed up hours later, unannounced
00:37:46I guess something did happen between them the other night
00:37:49What'd Zach say?
00:37:50Well, I mean, he said he wanted me to stay
00:37:53And, you know, but I think it was just plain dumb
00:37:55I'm gonna get you, Dale
00:37:57I really don't
00:37:58What?
00:37:59Why don't you just go for him?
00:38:02Because, Seven
00:38:03I'm done having meaningless relationships
00:38:05With these loser L.A. guys
00:38:07Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun
00:38:08Whoa
00:38:08Zach is a loser L.A. guy
00:38:10No, he's
00:38:14No, he's not
00:38:15But, anyhow, I'm not his type
00:38:17Especially now that Hallie's all over him
00:38:19You are so wrong
00:38:21You're so wrong
00:38:22It doesn't matter
00:38:24Because, hey, I'm gonna go out on a date with Hayden
00:38:26Whoa, whoa, whoa
00:38:28But just his friend
00:38:28You're going out with Hayden
00:38:30The fame-seeking personal trainer
00:38:32Who's only using you to get ahead in this desperate city
00:38:35Oh, shit, Seven
00:38:37That's harsh
00:38:39He just wants to schmooze you
00:38:40So you listen to his stupid reality show concept
00:38:43He's only interested in seeing what you can do for him in his career
00:38:46Because you have a career
00:38:47And the only reason Hallie isn't to Zach
00:38:49Is because you gave her the okay to pursue
00:38:51I never said pursue
00:38:54She asked me if we'd ever hooked up
00:38:55And I said no
00:38:56Liz, I've never said this to you before
00:38:57But you are gonna regret this
00:38:59Trust me
00:39:01Damn it, you're afraid of a real relationship, Dale
00:39:04Why does everyone keep saying that?
00:39:06I am not scared of relationships
00:39:08But you're scared of something
00:39:10Let's just forget about it
00:39:17Okay
00:39:27Sorry
00:39:29Yeah, no, it's okay
00:39:31I just wasn't expecting that
00:39:33Was it weird seeing Dale?
00:39:41Yeah
00:39:41Yeah, it was weird
00:39:43I felt like I sensed something between you guys
00:39:46Yeah
00:39:49Yeah, I think maybe you did
00:39:52I don't know
00:39:52Dale and I are really tight
00:39:53You know
00:39:55And as I told you before, Hallie
00:39:57I'm just not that interested in a relationship right now
00:39:59And I wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong impression
00:40:00About what's going on here
00:40:02She's the one that told me to pursue you
00:40:06Just so you know
00:40:07She told you that
00:40:07Yeah, you sound surprised
00:40:11She said you guys were just friends
00:40:13You've never hooked up
00:40:14And that she isn't your type
00:40:15Not my type
00:40:17So, are we cool?
00:40:23Yeah, yeah, yeah
00:40:24We're cool
00:40:24We're cool
00:40:24But I just
00:40:25I don't think this is a very good idea
00:40:27Right now
00:40:28Okay?
00:40:28What?
00:40:29This isn't a good idea?
00:40:30Look, I just
00:40:30I'm just not that into this
00:40:32Right now
00:40:33You're not into this?
00:40:34No
00:40:34Are you into this?
00:40:36Hey
00:40:45Hey, Hayden
00:40:47Hey, is that a stutter?
00:40:48Hey, Hayden
00:40:49Oh
00:40:49Just joking
00:40:50That's a great restaurant
00:40:59It's got some health conscious options
00:41:01Because you know
00:41:02I like to take care of myself
00:41:04As you can see
00:41:06I did notice your pecs just now
00:41:09Oh
00:41:10Hey
00:41:11Hey
00:41:11Hey
00:41:12Are you flexing?
00:41:14What are you talking about?
00:41:15What are you talking about?
00:41:15Really?
00:41:16Wow
00:41:17What are your options for something low-carb, low-fat, low-sodium, high-profess?
00:41:25Which is better, the bacon cheeseburger or the baby back ribs?
00:41:27Is the Cajun-style wild-caught or farm-raised?
00:41:30Do you have chicken fingers or brand-based?
00:41:31Very good
00:41:32Organic, vegan, non-soy, gluten-free, non-gen
00:41:34Do you recommend the mac and cheese?
00:41:35Have you seen that?
00:41:36It's a little brilliant
00:41:37Because I don't want any acrylomites in my food
00:41:38I have the crab cakes with butter sauce
00:41:39Extra butter
00:41:40Are these Swedish meatballs kosher?
00:41:42You're right
00:41:43But people really are vain here
00:41:45I mean, I'm not
00:41:46I'm self-aware
00:41:47Which is, like, radically different
00:41:49And I'm self-conscious
00:41:51Conscious of self
00:41:52Right
00:41:53I'm self-conscious
00:41:54Which is a good thing, I think
00:41:55What do you think?
00:41:56Well, I mean, I think it's really good
00:41:57Well, I'm all about my work
00:41:58And my body is my work
00:41:59So
00:42:00One might say that
00:42:02Yeah, I'm all about my body
00:42:03But
00:42:04In some respects, that is true
00:42:05But I mean, you're completely missing the point
00:42:07And the point is
00:42:08You're completely missing my point
00:42:14Okay, rewind, reset
00:42:16Look
00:42:17I feel like I've got a great vibe between you and me
00:42:20Great energy going on here
00:42:21So yeah
00:42:22Okay
00:42:23I get it
00:42:24So let's lay the facts down
00:42:26You want to be with me
00:42:28And vice versa
00:42:29That much is clear
00:42:30But my work always comes first
00:42:32I need to lay that down right off the bat
00:42:34Basically
00:42:35My body comes before you
00:42:37He seems perfect
00:42:39Good looking
00:42:40Somewhat single-minded
00:42:41Somewhat vain
00:42:42And
00:42:43Not too bright
00:42:44No promise of a great romance
00:42:46But
00:42:47No chance of falling too hard for this guy
00:42:49No risk of getting hurt
00:42:52You have a desk job
00:42:53But is this right for me?
00:42:55I'm kind of sensing a pattern here
00:42:58You've got this great beautiful chest on you
00:43:01With great definition
00:43:02Would you probably bench press quite a bit
00:43:03Is seven right about me?
00:43:05I hate for seven to be right
00:43:07Because he's always right about that kind of stuff
00:43:11Seriously, I don't think that's jerky or-
00:43:16I need a sign
00:43:18Is this right for me?
00:43:20I got this great idea
00:43:21I know you're gonna love it
00:43:23Fitness Fanatics
00:43:25It's my reality TV show
00:43:29Check please
00:43:31Check please
00:43:33Is that the checks?
00:43:34Yeah
00:43:43Hi!
00:43:44Ready, Freddy?
00:43:46We're walking, right?
00:43:48You don't want to drive?
00:43:49You guys, it's two blocks
00:43:51They have valet parking, you know
00:43:53So where's Hallie this morning?
00:44:02I don't know
00:44:03I saw her on Tuesday
00:44:04And I haven't seen her for the rest of the week
00:44:06You know that she changed her status to
00:44:08It's complicated?
00:44:09What does that mean?
00:44:11It's complicated?
00:44:13With who?
00:44:14Oh my gosh, you guys
00:44:16The yoga instructor just smiled at me
00:44:18He is the cutest dimple
00:44:20Okay, he's telling us to shut up
00:44:22His smile is just his stated zen
00:44:25Oh gosh
00:44:28Namaste
00:44:29Namaste
00:44:31You guys really do this all the time?
00:44:33Yeah
00:44:34I have to
00:44:35I'm older than you
00:44:36You get fatter quicker
00:44:38Sorry I'm late
00:44:39I just got your message
00:44:41You're late
00:44:43Hey
00:44:45Hey
00:44:46What's going on?
00:44:47You guys look so serious
00:44:48I was telling Dale about my wedding
00:44:50I mean
00:44:51Drew still hasn't picked a tux yet
00:44:53Or groomsmen for that matter
00:44:55Well you know
00:44:56We're guys
00:44:57We take a little bit longer
00:44:58We're that kind of stuff
00:44:59Yeah
00:45:02Well I gotta go
00:45:03I have a hair appointment at 2
00:45:04And then a couple jewelry design appointments
00:45:06Wow that's so fetch
00:45:07Congrats girl
00:45:08Thanks girl
00:45:09So I'll call you later
00:45:10Hey
00:45:11Do you mind driving me home?
00:45:13No yoga
00:45:14No
00:45:15We missed it
00:45:16Um
00:45:17Yeah
00:45:18I guess
00:45:20Okay
00:45:21When did that start
00:45:22And did you know?
00:45:24Well I mean I kinda guessed
00:45:25But
00:45:26Does she know about you two?
00:45:27What's there to know?
00:45:29Hallie should know better
00:45:31Seriously
00:45:32Anybody that knows you would know that you are so hot for him
00:45:34Becca I am not so hot for him
00:45:35No
00:45:36He's your friend
00:45:37And
00:45:38It is so typical of Hallie
00:45:39She's a fame whore
00:45:41No she's not
00:45:42It's
00:45:44Dammit
00:45:45She is a fame whore
00:45:46No she's not
00:45:47Oh god
00:45:48Hallie's just frustrating me so much right now
00:45:50And
00:45:51She doesn't deserve that
00:45:52Hallie was scared for me when I had that swine flu
00:45:55Every time I've broken up with a quasi boyfriend
00:45:58I don't know what I would have done about that stalker if it wasn't for Hallie
00:46:04I need something to take my mind off all of this
00:46:09Del I don't know what I would do without you
00:46:11Oh come on
00:46:12That's what friends are for
00:46:13Oh honey
00:46:14Do you like that setting?
00:46:15Yeah no I do
00:46:16It's nice
00:46:17You didn't even look?
00:46:18No I did
00:46:19I'm looking
00:46:20Yeah I love it
00:46:21What do you think Del?
00:46:22Oh that's beautiful
00:46:23Yeah?
00:46:24Okay I gotta go
00:46:25I gotta go
00:46:26Wait what?
00:46:27Oh look at that's great
00:46:29That was my favorite
00:46:30I love you
00:46:31I love you so much
00:46:32I love you
00:46:34Shit
00:46:35He makes me so mad
00:46:37We're planning the registry for the most important day of our life and he just leaves
00:46:41Maybe he's just feeling a bit of
00:46:43A bit of what?
00:46:44Anxiety?
00:46:45Can't believe you're defending him
00:46:47What?
00:46:48No no no no I'm not defending him
00:46:50You just don't understand
00:46:51You can't possibly comprehend what it feels like inside of me right now because you've never been here
00:46:56Well that's
00:46:58That's true
00:46:59I used to think about what it'd be like to live your life Dale
00:47:03Just walking in your shoes
00:47:05Nobody expects anything from you
00:47:08They don't
00:47:10No one expects anything from me?
00:47:12Mm-mm
00:47:13Cause you don't have parents expecting babies and marriages and perfect husbands
00:47:17It's really hard
00:47:19I mean it's true but
00:47:21It doesn't mean I want to end up alone
00:47:24Tell me something Dale
00:47:27Am I expecting too much?
00:47:29It's wanting my fiance to be excited about our wedding
00:47:32Is that too much?
00:47:34I don't know Jill
00:47:39Back at St. Mary's for our first communion
00:47:42The biggest deal was finding out who you were gonna get paired up with
00:47:46I dreamed of walking down the aisle with Billy Dobson
00:47:49Hand in hand
00:47:51But no such luck
00:47:52He was paired with Jill and I ended up with what's his face who picked his nose all the time
00:47:56I wonder if I'll ever get to walk down the aisle with Billy Dobson of my own
00:48:10Oh is this your parents?
00:48:12Yeah that's them
00:48:15And is this you with your mother?
00:48:17Yeah
00:48:18Yeah
00:48:23Here look at this one
00:48:25Oh that's great
00:48:26With the smoke around Jill's face
00:48:28Yeah
00:48:30So how's Hallie?
00:48:32Looks like you guys are an item now huh?
00:48:34No
00:48:35No not an item
00:48:37Definitely not
00:48:38She's a very nice girl
00:48:40But um
00:48:41She doesn't take no for an answer does she?
00:48:44Well you're a big boy I'm sure you can handle her
00:48:46Hey um
00:48:48I wanted to ask you
00:48:49Did you tell her to pursue me?
00:48:54Hello there Miss Homebody
00:48:56Why aren't you dressed yet?
00:48:57For what?
00:48:58Did you forget my big screen debut Dale?
00:49:01We're going to my L.A. red carpet premiere hello
00:49:04What do you think Johnson?
00:49:06I think she's dead
00:49:11No excuses
00:49:13Seven was supposed to tell you
00:49:14Yeah well he didn't
00:49:16Oh my god I did actually
00:49:17It's just that you had your head buried in those photos and you didn't notice
00:49:20Well I mean can I wear this?
00:49:22It's L.A. you can wear whatever you want
00:49:24Okay I'll just grab my purse
00:49:26I'll get your heels
00:49:28Well hello to you too
00:49:29I thought you said you had a meeting to go to
00:49:31What?
00:49:32You said you had a meeting remember when I texted you earlier?
00:49:35Oh yeah I did but I'm done now
00:49:37Hallie what's up what's going on?
00:49:38What's going on?
00:49:39I think I should be asking you that question
00:49:40Excuse me?
00:49:42What is going on Dale?
00:49:44Look I'm just
00:49:45Nothing
00:49:47Did I miss something here?
00:49:48Oh wait
00:49:49Do you like him now?
00:49:50Is that it?
00:49:51Look I'm just going to leave
00:49:52Alright
00:49:53Of course you are
00:49:54Zach you're a piece of crap
00:49:55You know that?
00:49:56You're just another famous asshole guy
00:49:58Who thinks he can screw around with any girl he wants
00:50:00And then not call him
00:50:01Well fuck you!
00:50:02We're not even dating Hallie
00:50:03I've told you that ten times
00:50:04Okay look look
00:50:05I'm just going to leave
00:50:06Alright Dale?
00:50:07As long as I'm here this is not going to end well
00:50:09Just leave!
00:50:10Okay?
00:50:14I bet you wanted that to happen didn't you?
00:50:18I'm seriously not following you Hallie
00:50:20You really need to calm down
00:50:21You put on this little woe is me act
00:50:23But I'm not buying it
00:50:24Just because you throw yourself at every guy who's famous
00:50:27Who you think can get you somewhere
00:50:29And who you think wants you and then shoots you down
00:50:31You know what?
00:50:32Don't take that out on me okay?
00:50:33You play the victim thing really well
00:50:36But it's a load of crap
00:50:38Shut up
00:50:39You're not my friend Dale
00:50:41You're just like every other two faced girl in L.A.
00:50:43You just play it better
00:50:44What are you guys?
00:50:45This is retarded
00:50:46Are you just going to take her side?
00:50:47I'm not taking anybody's side okay?
00:50:49Come on Hallie let's go
00:50:50Just don't touch me
00:50:56That really just happened?
00:51:03This week on Dirty Roomies
00:51:07What are you going to clean this up?
00:51:08I can't live like this
00:51:09I made the mess
00:51:10I don't understand why I should have to clean it up
00:51:12You guys had sex?
00:51:13We have to do a paper edit on these and get them to the lettering
00:51:16The producers just want to see it by Friday
00:51:18I think clean is overrated
00:51:20There's still a lot of poo down the heat
00:51:21I'm not pooping where I eat
00:51:23There's something really truthful about just waiting and doing your whole job at once
00:51:27We're going to use up all the dishes and then it's time to clean
00:51:34So you want to talk about it?
00:51:36Not really
00:51:39Hallie call?
00:51:40No
00:51:41Call her?
00:51:42And say what?
00:51:44We haven't done anything
00:51:45Until I do it
00:51:46I'm not a housewife
00:51:47I found fleas in the bedroom
00:51:48You mean my pets?
00:51:49I think fleas are people too
00:51:51And they should be treated so I'd show you
00:51:53Those are my pets!
00:51:54And you're going to kill them?
00:51:55Are you a murderer?
00:51:56Seven, what do you think I should do?
00:52:00Be honest
00:52:02Well, I've been honest
00:52:05Not with Hallie
00:52:07With yourself
00:52:09Sorry, babe
00:52:10I cannot give you any more advice on this one
00:52:13And you put on your pants you look like
00:52:15You know, look, if Vanessa has a problem with it, she should clean that shit up
00:52:19Hey, it's Dale
00:52:21Listen, Hallie, will you?
00:52:22Will you just call me back, please?
00:52:24Since I have a private number, Hallie won't pick up
00:52:28Neither will any of our friends, in case it's, you know, someone annoying
00:52:32They will call you back
00:52:33But since we all have private numbers, it's nearly impossible for us to communicate by phone
00:52:38Fortunately, I pick up my phone, otherwise this game of trading voicemails would never end
00:52:43Hello?
00:52:45Hey, it's Hallie
00:52:47Hey
00:52:49Jerk off!
00:52:51This guy's on his cell phone and can't drive
00:52:54Sorry
00:52:56Hey, are you okay?
00:52:58Yeah, I'm okay
00:53:00How are you?
00:53:01Hey, um, you wanna meet up for dinner tonight and maybe just clear the air about everything?
00:53:07Yeah, I think we should
00:53:08How does 8pm at Cascade count?
00:53:10Alright, sounds good
00:53:11Great, I'll meet you there
00:53:12Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh
00:53:18Aww
00:53:19You didn't think I'd forget, did you?
00:53:21Wow, they're beautiful
00:53:23Thank you
00:53:25So what are the big plans for tonight?
00:53:28Well, that was, um, Hallie
00:53:29She wants to, uh, get together, I think, so we can talk about everything
00:53:33I think she forgot it was my birthday, though
00:53:35I mean, it was just understandable under the circumstances
00:53:38What about the other girls?
00:53:40I guess it slipped their mind
00:53:42Jill's all wrapped up in her wedding
00:53:43And, you know, Becca just got that huge movie, so
00:53:46It's okay
00:53:48Happy birthday, Doe
00:53:58Hi, I have a reservation for, um, Squire or Hallie Kimball
00:54:03Thanks
00:54:06Surprise!
00:54:08You didn't think we were gonna forget, did you?
00:54:10I kinda did
00:54:11Happy birthday
00:54:12Happy birthday
00:54:13Happy birthday
00:54:14Alright, you guys, let's dance!
00:54:15Woo!
00:54:16Woo!
00:54:17Woo!
00:54:18Cause you're my grave
00:54:21But get away
00:54:25It's like a chase
00:54:29Cause you're my grave
00:54:34Woo!
00:54:35Woo!
00:54:36Woo!
00:54:37Woo!
00:54:38Woo!
00:54:39Make a wish!
00:54:40But don't tell anyone or it won't come true
00:54:42Okay
00:54:43What could I possibly wish for?
00:54:45Woo!
00:54:50Woo!
00:54:52Happy birthday!
00:54:53Thank you, bye!
00:54:54Thank you, bye!
00:54:55Alright
00:54:56You're drunk, Jill!
00:54:59You're drunk, Jill!
00:55:00You never cared before when I was drunk
00:55:02And it's Dale's birthday for Christ's sake!
00:55:04Alright, you have got to lower your voice now, because now you're making a scene!
00:55:05You've got to relax, Drew!
00:55:06Cause there's nothing I've never heard before!
00:55:07You are so self-centered, Drew!
00:55:08There's bigger things happening in the world than your stupid actor clients and the Nielsen ratings on the TV!
00:55:09You're now on the TV!
00:55:10You're on the TV!
00:55:11You're on the TV!
00:55:12You're on the TV!
00:55:13You're on the TV!
00:55:14You're on the TV!
00:55:15You're on the TV!
00:55:16You're on the TV!
00:55:17You're on the TV!
00:55:18You're on the TV!
00:55:19You have got to lower your voice now, because now you're making a scene!
00:55:22Uh, you've got to relax, Drew!
00:55:24Cause there's nothing I've never heard before!
00:55:26You are so self-centered, Drew!
00:55:29There's bigger things happening in the world than your stupid actor clients and the Nielsen ratings on the TV!
00:55:35You're now officially embarrassing everybody here, okay?
00:55:39Don't you dare effing tell me that I'm embarrassing you, okay?
00:55:44Because my friends think you're a douchebag!
00:55:47A nasty-ass sleazebag agent!
00:55:50Drew, we don't think you're a douchebag!
00:55:51It's okay, thanks!
00:55:53Oh, where are you gonna go?
00:55:55Are you gonna go home and masturbate to one of your anime porns?
00:56:00It's cartoons!
00:56:01He made me watch anime porn!
00:56:03Yeah, I'm gonna go home and masturbate!
00:56:05That's disgusting!
00:56:06Because it's better than anything you're giving me at home!
00:56:09No, cause you love to masturbate!
00:56:10Cause for you it's like having sex with somebody that you love!
00:56:13Yourself!
00:56:14Did you just make that up?
00:56:16Annie Hall, 77.
00:56:17I'm going home!
00:56:18You're gonna go screw one of your actresses?
00:56:21One of your stupid, slutty, sleep-your-way-to-the-top actresses?
00:56:31Honey, I need to go to the bathroom.
00:56:32Somebody can stick around.
00:56:33Cause now she's drunk and you're pissed off.
00:56:36That's like the worst combination for you!
00:56:38I know!
00:56:39Oh, just...
00:56:40It's okay, it's okay.
00:56:41It's okay, it's okay.
00:56:46I'm stuck.
00:56:49I'm sorry, Dale.
00:56:50Jill, you don't have to be sorry.
00:56:51You just got a little wasted.
00:56:53That's all.
00:56:54Oh, I drank too much.
00:56:57Never drinking again.
00:56:58I've heard that one before.
00:56:59I don't like you once to marry me, you guys.
00:57:03And then I'm getting married in three weeks.
00:57:08Blue?
00:57:09Don't worry about Drew right now.
00:57:11Just finish blowing chunks, okay?
00:57:13Why don't you go make sure everything's okay out there?
00:57:15I'll stay here with Jill.
00:57:16Okay.
00:57:17Listen, Hallie.
00:57:18I'm really sorry.
00:57:19Are we okay?
00:57:20Yeah, we're okay.
00:57:21I said a lot of things I didn't mean.
00:57:22I'm sorry.
00:57:23Me too.
00:57:24I'm so sorry.
00:57:25Okay.
00:57:26I said a lot of things I didn't mean.
00:57:27I'm sorry.
00:57:28Me too.
00:57:29I'm so sorry.
00:57:30Okay.
00:57:37Look what the cat dragged in.
00:57:39Seven told me about your little surprise party.
00:57:41You know, it's your birthday, so I wanted to come out.
00:57:45See you.
00:57:46I'm glad you did.
00:57:49Wait, where are the girls?
00:57:51Oh, my God.
00:57:52I told everybody he jacks off.
00:57:54Two cartoons.
00:57:56Oh, God.
00:57:57I am not drunk, but I definitely am sorry.
00:58:03Come on.
00:58:04Let's come get something to eat.
00:58:05I'm really hungry.
00:58:06You two want to come eat?
00:58:08Oh, no.
00:58:09We'll stay.
00:58:10I mean, I'll stay there.
00:58:11I'll still stay with you.
00:58:12Okay.
00:58:14Aww.
00:58:19Bye.
00:58:20Good job.
00:58:21Thank you, Papa.
00:58:22Thank you.
00:58:24Going?
00:58:25Wow.
00:58:26Quite a nice.
00:58:27Yeah, definitely.
00:58:28Was it a birthday dance?
00:58:31I don't know.
00:58:32Come on.
00:58:33Come on.
00:58:34I wish that I was walking
00:58:39Cause I would not be stopping
00:58:44Till I wake in your backyard
01:17:11Aujourd'hui est ma première communion.
01:17:13Hey, ma belle est la même chose que toi.
01:17:16Oh, tu es vrai.
01:17:18C'est vrai.
01:17:19Vous êtes très prête.
01:17:21Merci.
01:17:23Est-ce que tu es le chien ?
01:17:26Oui.
01:17:27Vous n'êtes pas plus prête que le bride.
01:17:30Bye, bye.
01:17:32Story of my life.
01:17:36Ok.
01:17:37C'est bon.
01:17:39Hey, are you waiting for them ?
01:17:41If you give us a ride, I'll make it worth your-
01:17:42Listen, Dale.
01:17:43I'm too tired to drive.
01:17:44Will you drive my car home?
01:17:46Seven.
01:17:50Ok.
01:17:54Boys.
01:17:56Dale.
01:17:58Catch.
01:18:09Hey.
01:18:10Hey.
01:18:11Hey.
01:18:15No more douchebag boyfriends.
01:18:16Semi-relationships.
01:18:17And keeping people at an emotional arms length.
01:18:19Hey.
01:18:20Hey.
01:18:21Hey.
01:18:22No more douchebag boyfriends.
01:18:23Send me relationships.
01:18:24And keeping people at an emotional arms length.
01:18:26No more douchebag boyfriends.
01:18:27No more douchebag boyfriends.
01:18:28Semi-relationships.
01:18:29And keeping people at an emotional arms length.
01:18:31I just wanted to say-
01:18:32No, wait.
01:18:33Sure, I'm putting myself at risk again.
01:18:35But I'm finally ready to face an uncertain but promising future.
01:18:51When you walk with angels, love surrounds you.
01:19:01You walk with angels wherever you are.
01:19:08You walk with angels, angels, angels, wherever you are.
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