- 2 days ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Love. I mean as in romantic love. That's what we're gonna study today, class.
00:00:29We're gonna ask ourselves that age-old question, where exactly does love come from?
00:00:35Now most of us in this classroom have experienced some degree of love. At least I hope you have.
00:00:40But if not, I'm sure you've been exposed to the expressions of love in poems, songs, plays, books, movies, in celebrations, in tragedies, or passionate days.
00:00:56However, no matter what we've experienced, or how beautifully it's been described to us, like some mysterious force of the spirit, no one has ever explained what ignites those passionate flames of love.
00:01:09At least, they haven't explained it scientifically.
00:01:14Yeah! All I wanted was just a night with you, a night with you baby. All I wanted was just a night with you, so don't keep me waiting.
00:01:31Could it be a peculiar way our potential made walks or talks? Or maybe, just maybe, it has nothing to do with them at all.
00:01:44All I wanted was just a night with you, so don't keep me waiting.
00:01:51So if somehow, Cupid smiles upon us and shoots his arrow through our heart, we get the reward.
00:02:01One floor.
00:02:03One floor.
00:02:04And I really like the cozy war.
00:02:08The days are better on my bad new floor.
00:02:11If you know what I mean now.
00:02:15True.
00:02:18I'll stay if you ask me to.
00:02:21I'm not gonna lie to you.
00:02:24I really need a night with you.
00:02:28Yeah!
00:02:30All I wanted was just a night with you, a night with you baby.
00:02:37All I wanted was just a night with you, so don't keep me waiting.
00:02:43All I wanted was just a night with you, a night with you baby.
00:02:50All I wanted was just a night with you, so don't keep me waiting.
00:02:56But as we all know, it's not every day that one falls in love, or that special person falls in love with you.
00:03:09Now please believe me, how well do I know that?
00:03:16Um, any questions?
00:03:19No, no, shocking.
00:03:21All right, folks, get out there and get that reward, because that's what it's all about, right?
00:03:26And I will see you on Thursday.
00:03:31And Friday.
00:03:33And every day, because I love you.
00:03:35Go get him.
00:03:37Professor, he's a little odd, don't you think?
00:03:39Who, Grimes? He seems normal to all of you.
00:03:42I don't know, he's not very professional.
00:03:44Kind of goofy.
00:03:46You say goofy like that's a bad thing.
00:03:48I'm goofy.
00:03:50That's different. You're my boyfriend, not my professor.
00:03:54I mean, making fun of animals, having sex.
00:03:57Speaking of which, I want to go back to your place for some of that bad monkey love.
00:04:00Shut up.
00:04:03Miss Alice?
00:04:06Yeah?
00:04:06Could I speak to you for a second, please?
00:04:10Sure.
00:04:15You need to call me.
00:04:17If I do, do I?
00:04:19Yeah, you do.
00:04:20Do you have a name?
00:04:22You'll learn everything about me tonight.
00:04:24Overdrinks, my place.
00:04:28Well, whoever you are, I'm sorry, but I'm already involved with somebody.
00:04:33Oh, of course.
00:04:34I'm sure you are involved with someone else, but that's only because you haven't been with me yet.
00:04:39I'll take that.
00:04:39Listen, I don't know what you've been smoking, but I'll tell you right now, there's no way I'll ever hook up with you.
00:04:48Well, I wouldn't be too sure about that.
00:04:51Ugh!
00:04:54Sorry about the f***ing dog, bro.
00:04:56Hey, man.
00:04:57She's all yours.
00:04:57What do you need, Professor Grimes?
00:05:04Please don't call me that, Professor Grimes.
00:05:07No, that puts way too much pressure on me to actually know a lot of stuff.
00:05:11Billy's fine.
00:05:11Okay, Billy.
00:05:16I see you submitted an application for teacher's assistant in this department.
00:05:20Aren't you a first year?
00:05:22Yeah, I know it's a long shot in all being a first year, but I thought I'd...
00:05:25No, no, no, that's okay.
00:05:26I was just recently transferred to this university myself, so technically I'm a first year as well.
00:05:32And I like first year assistants because they don't know enough to know that I don't know enough.
00:05:39Would you have a second?
00:05:40Can you talk to me in my office?
00:05:42Um.
00:05:43Just a second.
00:05:46Yeah, I have a minute.
00:05:48Come on.
00:05:52Okay, so that would basically make us both outsiders, which, uh, you know, could be a good thing.
00:05:58At least for my research.
00:06:00Considering it's primarily, uh, you know, thinking outside of the box, at least as far as the neurological community is concerned.
00:06:07What is it you're researching?
00:06:09Ah, that is information, uh, that is for me and my research team, which I hope to have you a part of soon.
00:06:16But before we can do that, I need to get your inoculation shots updated.
00:06:19Inoculation shots.
00:06:22Uh, does your research have something to do with some new infection or, like, virus I should be worried about?
00:06:28Uh, not really.
00:06:32No, this is more like insurance stuff.
00:06:34Bureaucratic red tape, that sort of thing.
00:06:37You know, you have to have your health records updated, right?
00:06:40TB, hepatitis, that sort of thing.
00:06:42Anyway, I want you to go down to the health clinic tomorrow morning.
00:06:46You better get there kind of early because it gets very crowded.
00:06:49Kids clamoring for free flu vaccines and, uh, you know, birth control pills, that sort of thing.
00:06:55Go ask for a guy named Miller, okay?
00:06:57He's going to take you right to the front of the line.
00:06:59Who is Miller?
00:07:02Miller is my, uh, rather rotund assistant.
00:07:04How many assistants do you have?
00:07:09Um, pretty much just Miller.
00:07:12Yeah, but he's pretty advanced in his training, so I've got him handling most of the ugly stuff.
00:07:17Like giving out the shots.
00:07:20Yeah, like giving out the shots.
00:07:27You know, I know it would be a great opportunity to work with you, Professor.
00:07:31Really.
00:07:32But I would really have to know more about your research before I could commit.
00:07:42I'm sorry, but I have got to go.
00:07:46That's okay.
00:07:47I understand.
00:07:48I mean, committing on your spare time to a project that you know absolutely nothing about, I doubt I could do that either.
00:07:56But I will tell you this.
00:07:58This project is going to make this planet a much better place to live in.
00:08:01But that's a promise.
00:08:03So in case you don't get any better offers or whatever, you take this.
00:08:08Call me.
00:08:12Call this house.
00:08:13I'm just a little nervous about this, Sam.
00:08:28That's all I'm saying.
00:08:29Alan, no one forced you to accept my offer to move in.
00:08:32I know that.
00:08:34Then what are you whining about?
00:08:36I don't know.
00:08:40I've been in a really sweet living situation.
00:08:45I wouldn't call sleeping on a dorm room floor with three guys addicted to beer and video games a really sweet living situation.
00:08:51Yeah, but it had its advantages.
00:08:56Oh, uh, advantages being what?
00:09:00Waking up next to them instead of waking up next to me?
00:09:05No, of course not.
00:09:07All I'm saying is, you know, it allowed for us to have a place to go be by ourselves every now and then.
00:09:11That's all.
00:09:12Well, I'm sure your ex-romates will let you visit.
00:09:19Sam, this just seems kind of rushed.
00:09:25That's all I'm saying.
00:09:26I mean, are we being irrational about this?
00:09:28Are you 100% sure?
00:09:34100% sure about living with you full time?
00:09:36Um, no, I'm not.
00:09:42Since when does love have to be rational?
00:09:44It'd be kind of boring, don't you think?
00:09:47Anyway, the point is, the point is,
00:09:52I am so deeply in love with you.
00:09:59And this is so odd for me to say this to anybody, but
00:10:05I'm just so incredibly immersed in your soul, your aura, your whatever,
00:10:16that when we're apart, it's like my world's a little darker,
00:10:20a little dimmer, a little more lonely.
00:10:29Really?
00:10:35Yeah.
00:10:37I mean, you said you felt the same way about me, didn't you?
00:10:42Yeah, but damn, I didn't put as cool as you just did.
00:10:49So, forget being 100% sure.
00:10:53And stop having these frat boy panic attacks and grow up.
00:10:56And just enjoy us being together, while we are together.
00:11:01Okay.
00:11:10Okay.
00:11:12You know, who knows?
00:11:13I might get sick of your cologne and throw your a** on the floor with your buddies.
00:11:19Really?
00:11:20You know, and then you'll miss out on the best part of moving in with me.
00:11:24Oh yeah?
00:11:26Hmm, what's the best part of moving in with you?
00:11:29Well, why don't you take a guess, Margot?
00:11:35Man, monkey, love?
00:11:36Man, you just got an A.
00:11:48What?
00:11:51What do you mean, what?
00:11:54Something's bothering you, what is it?
00:11:55How do you know something's bothering me?
00:12:00Because whenever something's bothering you, you just lie there looking at the ceiling.
00:12:04Really?
00:12:06Yeah, really.
00:12:08So you want to tell me?
00:12:12I got an offer today to be a teacher's assistant.
00:12:15Wait, isn't that supposed to be a good thing?
00:12:18I mean, you've been hoping for that for your resume.
00:12:22Yeah, but it's with Professor Grimes.
00:12:26So what's wrong with that?
00:12:27He seems pretty cool.
00:12:29Not really.
00:12:32I don't know, there's something...
00:12:34Something I don't trust about him.
00:12:37It gives me this weird vibe, like there's something else going on.
00:12:43Something...
00:12:45Something not so nice.
00:12:49Well, maybe you're just scared of the unknown.
00:12:52I mean, do you always have to know 100% what someone's motives are?
00:12:57I mean, everybody's got some kind of mystery to them.
00:13:02When did you get so deep?
00:13:04Oh, sorry.
00:13:06I know how you prefer your men dumb and all that.
00:13:08Yeah, I like them dumb and cute.
00:13:11So I guess we're on the two-way men.
00:13:19Excuse me.
00:13:20Hello?
00:13:20Excuse me.
00:13:21Excuse me.
00:13:23I don't believe this.
00:13:25I just ran into this long line at the clinic and I had to meet Jeff in half an hour.
00:13:31Hey, Erica.
00:13:32Here.
00:13:33I'll take you.
00:13:36I'll call you back.
00:13:49How you doing?
00:13:51Can you please not talk to me?
00:13:53Oh, this shot is not administered in the arm.
00:14:00You've got to be kidding me.
00:14:02I don't kid when it comes to science.
00:14:05Well, listen.
00:14:05You are not putting that in my ass.
00:14:07I bet I'm the first guy you ever told that to.
00:14:12Check this picture out.
00:14:14This is what the virus is capable of doing to your genitalia and...
00:14:18So turn around, drop your pants, bend over the table.
00:14:29Third gang, drop your pants.
00:14:41Bye.
00:14:42Do you know where I can find someone named Miller?
00:14:50Miller.
00:14:51Hi.
00:14:52Are you Miller?
00:14:53That's me.
00:14:54Professor Grimes sent me.
00:14:55Oh, yeah.
00:14:56You must be Sam.
00:14:57Yeah, he just called.
00:14:58He said you decided to be his assistant with me.
00:14:59Cool.
00:15:00Hey, can you give me a minute?
00:15:01I need to finish up in here first.
00:15:02Oh, we're not done yet.
00:15:05What?
00:15:06What?
00:15:07What?
00:15:08What?
00:15:09What?
00:15:10What?
00:15:11What?
00:15:12What?
00:15:13What?
00:15:14What?
00:15:15What?
00:15:16What?
00:15:17What?
00:15:18What?
00:15:19What?
00:15:20Just one more procedure.
00:15:22What?
00:15:23No way.
00:15:24My ass is on fire.
00:15:25Oh, we'll talk about that later.
00:15:28But this?
00:15:29It's for your nose.
00:15:30My nose?
00:15:44Sure you don't want me to take you back to the clinic?
00:15:46No, it's just a reaction to the inoculations.
00:15:50It'll pass.
00:15:51Is your arm still sore from the shot?
00:15:55That's not just my head.
00:15:56Like around my sinuses.
00:15:58Your sinuses?
00:16:00Yeah, they gave me some kind of nasal spray.
00:16:03What for?
00:16:06I don't know.
00:16:07I said it was a new procedure.
00:16:10He was kind of creepy.
00:16:12I didn't really care.
00:16:13I just wanted to get out of there.
00:16:19You'll be okay.
00:16:20You sure?
00:16:21Mm-hmm.
00:16:22I'll leave.
00:16:23I'm not leaving you.
00:16:24Promise?
00:16:25I promise.
00:16:26I don't know.
00:16:31So when I didn't see you last week, I thought you'd probably change your mind or something.
00:16:34Oh, I was kind of sick.
00:16:37I'm not as serious, I am.
00:16:39Mm, not at all.
00:16:40I think it was a mild reaction to the nasal spray.
00:16:43Oh.
00:16:46Gamotrope?
00:16:48Wow.
00:16:49They're like the largest medical research company on the planet.
00:16:52Are you involved with them?
00:16:54Not officially.
00:16:55You know, they're always trying to get me caught up in their corporate BS, but don't worry about that right now.
00:17:00Um, before we get started, I just want to make sure we're clear on one thing.
00:17:03You know, whatever takes place here in the lab has to stay here in the lab.
00:17:07That's standard procedure, Professor.
00:17:10Billy.
00:17:12Okay, good. I just want to make sure we're on the same page.
00:17:17Wow. This is by the lab.
00:17:24Pretty different from the other ones on campus.
00:17:27It works. You know, it does its job.
00:17:30So, then I, uh, how can I explain what I'm doing?
00:17:36My research conserves love.
00:17:39The scientific basis behind it.
00:17:44That's a lofty goal.
00:17:47Yes, it is.
00:17:49But I've always been interested in what it is that, uh, makes one person fall in love and the other person not.
00:17:55You know, that sort of thing.
00:17:57If you could figure that out, you'd be like the richest person in the world.
00:18:00Who's that?
00:18:01Who's that?
00:18:02But, uh, you know, to tell you the truth, my relationships always end up kind of sad.
00:18:09You know, a little bit ugly.
00:18:10Pretty much like, uh, most of the people out there.
00:18:13And I just wanted to figure out, uh, what that is. You know, what is it that makes us choose one partner or what it is that chooses that for us.
00:18:28That'd be nice to know.
00:18:32Certainly one.
00:18:34What about you? Are you in a relationship?
00:18:37Yeah. I, I just started one.
00:18:41And how's that going?
00:18:45Great.
00:18:46Just great?
00:18:51Yeah.
00:18:52Well, it's, uh, it's an incredibly fantastic relationship.
00:18:57You think it's gonna remain incredibly fantastic forever?
00:19:01I don't know.
00:19:06Incredibly fantastic's a good start, don't you think?
00:19:12It certainly is.
00:19:14Now, wouldn't it be cool if it would remain incredibly fantastic forever?
00:19:19Or at least as long as you choose it to be.
00:19:26Yeah, then, that would be pretty cool.
00:19:29That would be very cool.
00:19:31That would be very cool.
00:19:42Okay.
00:19:44I gotta get to the library.
00:19:45I got some research to do.
00:19:46But why don't you make yourself acquainted?
00:19:48And, uh, if you're not here when I get back, I'll see you Friday.
00:19:59I don't know what's going on.
00:20:00I'd rather what's not going on.
00:20:03I don't know.
00:20:05I'm just not feeling it.
00:20:07It would tell me what's going on.
00:20:09I'd rather what's not going on.
00:20:12I don't know.
00:20:16I'm just not feeling it.
00:20:21It?
00:20:23You're not feeling it?
00:20:24What, our sex life gets some kind of demotion from mad monkey love to it?
00:20:33That's it?
00:20:34That's it?
00:20:35I don't know how to do this, though.
00:20:36Okay.
00:20:40I'm going to get my ex-1990 food.
00:20:41But, I'm at the gym for my time.
00:20:43I'm at the gym for my time.
00:20:44I'll eat it.
00:20:45I'm at the gym for my time.
00:20:46I'm at the gym for my time.
00:20:55Hey, it's hot and cold.
00:20:57Hey, it's hot and cold.
00:21:02However, in my case, it's been cold for a long time now.
00:21:06Even when I'm by myself, I tend to fall asleep during the-
00:21:08Hold, hold, hold, hold, hold.
00:21:09I don't need that image in my head right now.
00:21:11My bad.
00:21:12What about him?
00:21:15Your type?
00:21:20Well, he's tall, good looking, zero body fat.
00:21:27No, not my type at all.
00:21:29You see, the same rules apply in the world.
00:21:32Hotties like him hook up with other hotties,
00:21:34but non-hotties like me hook up with-
00:21:37Well, we hook up alone.
00:21:39Thomas, how many times have I told you about the auto-league stuff, man?
00:21:43You just gotta go for it.
00:21:44I always do.
00:21:45I know, and I did at the gym.
00:21:47I said hello, but he must have some kind of super-
00:21:51and just told me he was straight and walked away.
00:21:53So what, man?
00:21:55Play the odds.
00:21:56Ask every hot guy you meet, and someone will say yes.
00:22:00Wait a minute.
00:22:01Why should I take advice on being confident from you?
00:22:04A guy who's stressing over a girl like some little schoolboy?
00:22:09I mean, just one night, Sam's not in the mood for s***,
00:22:12all of a sudden having a panic attack.
00:22:14No, it wasn't that she was just not in the mood for sex.
00:22:16She didn't respond to anything that had to do with me.
00:22:19It was like I was this unwelcome guest or something.
00:22:23Is it that time of the month?
00:22:25No.
00:22:26Trust me, that's never an issue with her.
00:22:28I don't know, I just get this weird vibe like she's-
00:22:31I don't know, she's into someone else.
00:22:34Great, now you're paranoid.
00:22:37Well, I mean, she has been spending a lot of time up with one of her professors with
00:22:41this research project.
00:22:42Dude, listen to me, you are totally falling apart here.
00:22:46And I think it's because for the first time in your life you've made a big commitment to
00:22:50one girl.
00:22:51And you're worried you've made a big mistake, which leads to doubt, which leads to suspicion
00:22:57that she's a f***ing professor or something.
00:23:02You think she is?
00:23:05Okay, before I lose all respect for you as a man, just do this.
00:23:09Girls are big in the whole nesting thing, so go home, clean the place up, fix her a nice
00:23:15dinner, and she'll be back tomorrow.
00:23:17I can't cook.
00:23:20Doesn't matter.
00:23:21Order takeout and say that you made it.
00:23:24The point is, is it's just a little bump in the relationship road and you've got to learn
00:23:28how to deal with it without getting paranoid.
00:23:30Do you know all about how relationships work because?
00:23:33I watch Oprah.
00:23:36You were the one.
00:23:37It's just you and me, pal.
00:23:38I remember little things that you said.
00:23:43Like, baby, we get along better than my girlfriend.
00:23:50I remember paying you no mind.
00:23:51Said you two are doing fine, you're doing fine.
00:23:55Yeah, baby.
00:23:56You're doing fine.
00:23:57Yeah, baby.
00:23:58Yeah, Erica.
00:23:59Yeah, Erica.
00:24:00Yeah.
00:24:01Yeah, Erica.
00:24:02Yeah.
00:24:03You're doing fine.
00:24:04You're doing fine.
00:24:05You're doing fine.
00:24:10Oh, yeah.
00:24:11Oh, yeah.
00:24:12Oh, yeah.
00:24:13Oh, yeah.
00:24:14Right there.
00:24:15Right there.
00:24:16Oh, yeah.
00:24:17Oh, yeah.
00:24:18Yeah baby, yeah Erica, yeah.
00:24:25That's a daddy, that's a daddy baby, yeah.
00:24:30That's a daddy baby, yeah.
00:24:33Oh yeah, oh yeah.
00:24:37Right there, right there, oh yeah.
00:24:40In the dark I'm reaching out for you.
00:24:45You start to roll over, and I feel you dreaming.
00:24:54You were the one, I gave all my love to.
00:24:58You were the one, I shouldn't have won too.
00:25:01You were the one, who made me hate myself, such a dark sweet hell.
00:25:08You were the one, I stayed up and died for.
00:25:12You were the one, I can't be happy for you.
00:25:17Hey.
00:25:19Hey.
00:25:24What's this?
00:25:27I just thought I'd get us a nice dinner.
00:25:29This little thank you for asking me to move in and everything.
00:25:33I'm sorry, but you didn't tell me you had plans.
00:25:39I'm sorry too, you didn't tell me you were going to work late with your professor.
00:25:43I don't think I like that tone, Alan.
00:25:46What tone is that?
00:25:48Childish, hostile, accusatory.
00:25:52Let me know if I miss something.
00:25:54You're right, I am all those things right now.
00:25:57My being that way fits the situation.
00:26:01I have no dignity left.
00:26:06Might as well ask you.
00:26:08Are you messing around with your professor?
00:26:13If you're asking me whether I'm fucking him or not, the answer is no.
00:26:23How dare you confront me like some jealous teenage boyfriend?
00:26:28That's what I am.
00:26:29I mean, I'm not some teenager, but we live together, Sam.
00:26:32And jealousy feels rather appropriate.
00:26:35I'm not talking.
00:26:36Sam.
00:26:37What?
00:26:38I don't particularly like all this drama, but I gotta know straight out.
00:26:42Are you even thinking about messing around with your professor?
00:26:50You know, I don't like coming into my apartment and being-
00:26:52Sam, you didn't answer the question.
00:26:54Now I need to know.
00:26:57Are you messing around with your professor or not?
00:27:07You know, you said you wanted me to move in here because you wanted to build this cool relationship.
00:27:20I know.
00:27:21Then what happened between you and him?
00:27:24I don't know what happened between us.
00:27:28It's just, when I'm around him, I get this nice feeling.
00:27:34So basically everything you said about us, about me, was just all bull****.
00:27:39No.
00:27:40No.
00:27:41No.
00:27:42I meant what I said about you.
00:27:43I swear.
00:27:44No, if you swear, then how could you just go be with somebody else, Sam?
00:27:57Do you want me to move out?
00:28:04I don't know.
00:28:06You want me to stay?
00:28:07I don't know.
00:28:08You want me to stay?
00:28:09I don't know.
00:28:10You want me to stay?
00:28:20What the fuck are you doing?
00:28:22No.
00:28:23No.
00:28:24No.
00:28:25No.
00:28:27I'm sorry.
00:28:28No.
00:28:30Sorry.
00:28:31No.
00:28:32No.
00:28:33I don't see.
00:28:34I'm going to die.
00:28:35I'll tell you guys.
00:28:36I have to sue Oprah.
00:28:37Yeah, I don't get it man.
00:28:43Doesn't make any sense to me, you know?
00:28:45It's like, she said that she was so in love with me.
00:28:50Making all these plans, talking about the future.
00:28:54And then one day she meets one of her professors and says, that's it.
00:28:58You know, we're no more.
00:29:00This is kind of sad, man.
00:29:02I mean, confident ladies, man, like yourself, falling apart like this.
00:29:08Maybe finally getting dumped by someone is some sort of karmic payback or something like that.
00:29:15No.
00:29:17I've been telling plenty of times, man, believe me.
00:29:20It's usually because I screwed up or the chick was psycho.
00:29:23But this...
00:29:29This is too bizarre, man.
00:29:32I mean, I was the perfect boyfriend.
00:29:37No way I could have read her wrong.
00:29:39And that she would dump me for one of her professors?
00:29:43A guy that weirded her out?
00:29:46I mean, she said there was something about him she didn't even trust.
00:29:49He doesn't matter.
00:29:56Whether you did right or wrong doesn't matter.
00:29:59What matters is she left.
00:30:01And you need to man up.
00:30:14Hey, Thomas.
00:30:16What do you want, Roger?
00:30:18No, nothing.
00:30:19I was just, I was passing by and I was wondering if you're busy or anything right now.
00:30:24Because I just thought I saw someone, a guy come in here and I was wondering if...
00:30:28You are such a s***.
00:30:35Wow, that was embarrassing.
00:30:37Sorry.
00:30:38What was his problem?
00:30:39When I first moved in here, I gave a housewarming party, invited everyone from the computer department.
00:30:45I proceeded to get incredibly drunk, and he and I ended up, you know...
00:30:52With him?
00:30:53With him?
00:30:54He's right, you are a s***.
00:30:56Yeah.
00:30:57Me a s***.
00:30:58Me a thunk.
00:30:59Me a thunk.
00:31:00Unfortunately, when I told him it was just a one night thing, he went psycho stalker, moved
00:31:05right across the hall where he can keep an eye on me.
00:31:09I hope you don't plan on going off on Sam like that.
00:31:16Don't lie, I'm so not like that.
00:31:25You know, it might not have anything to do with me or Sam.
00:31:29It might have something to do with that professor.
00:31:32Professor Grimes.
00:31:35Okay, you're beginning to scare me.
00:31:38Look, just do me a favor.
00:31:40Oh no.
00:31:41Just use whatever magical computer powers you have and just check into them.
00:31:44I'm the professor.
00:31:45Oh, Alan, come on.
00:31:46Come on, just do me this one little favor, man, and if everything checks out, I'm so done
00:31:50with Sam.
00:31:52I find that hard to believe.
00:31:55Who knows?
00:31:56I might go s***.
00:31:59Great, more competition for the hot guys.
00:32:05So who are we to question with?
00:32:08What chemistry wants?
00:32:11What chemistry brings together?
00:32:14And isn't there some sort of natural order to things that we don't understand anyway?
00:32:18Nor do we need to understand.
00:32:19So I ask you, and I ask you, and I ask you, and I ask all of you, who are we to question what Mother Nature desires?
00:32:32And please believe me, folks, this world never suffered so much since us humans decided to come down from the trees and use our opposable thumbs to develop technology.
00:32:46Think about that.
00:32:47Think about that.
00:32:49And we will discuss thumbs next week.
00:32:51I want you to read chapters 10 through 13 over the weekend.
00:32:56Keep the wheels spinning, folks.
00:32:58Okay?
00:33:00I had a good time today.
00:33:01I'll see you later.
00:33:02I'll see you later.
00:33:07Sam.
00:33:09Alan.
00:33:11It's good to see you.
00:33:12How have you been?
00:33:14I'm okay considering a breakup and everything.
00:33:17You gonna be okay?
00:33:19Yeah, I'll be fine.
00:33:21I just wonder when I get the rest of my stuff.
00:33:24Anytime.
00:33:25Just call before you come.
00:33:27Why?
00:33:30You gonna have company?
00:33:34I really hope you get over this, Alan.
00:33:36How can you get over this so fast?
00:33:37You were the one that wanted us to get together and everything.
00:33:39I know that.
00:33:42Look, I'm really happy now.
00:33:43Isn't that important?
00:33:45No.
00:33:47I mean, I'm not happy.
00:33:50Sam, you ready?
00:33:52Really?
00:33:56This is Alan.
00:33:59Oh, hey.
00:34:01Sam has, uh, said some wonderful things about you.
00:34:06Must not be too wonderful as soon as she dumped me for you.
00:34:13Okay.
00:34:15That's, uh, that's an uncomfortable moment.
00:34:18Um, I'm gonna let you two...
00:34:24Listen, uh...
00:34:26She's worried about you, okay?
00:34:29And, uh, quite frankly, so am I.
00:34:32You're worried about me?
00:34:34I'm fine. I should be worried about you two.
00:34:37Why would you be worried about us?
00:34:40Because you...
00:34:42Well, because...
00:34:48going, one, two, two...
00:34:50Wow.
00:34:51Wow.
00:35:21Why didn't you make other friends when you were growing up?
00:35:30Man, just one more night, I promise. Never again.
00:35:32Right, never again. Look, why don't I just give you an extra key for when you never do this again?
00:35:42You know, I had some time, so I actually did a search on your competition.
00:35:48Professor Love Rocket. Same thing, Bang Buddy.
00:35:53Bang Buddy, nice.
00:35:55Listen, it's kind of interesting. I found a lot of information about him as classified.
00:36:00A chemotrope.
00:36:02Chemotrope?
00:36:03Whoa.
00:36:05Yeah, whoa.
00:36:07Did you hack into it?
00:36:10Right, Alan, I'm going to try and break into one of the biggest, most secure computer networks in the world.
00:36:15risk being thrown in prison just so you can learn more about who's banging your ex-girlfriend?
00:36:20Well, did you break in or not?
00:36:22Yeah, of course I did.
00:36:24I mean, chemotrope recruits nerds out of my computer department.
00:36:32In fact, Mugi and Joe, a couple guys I used to party with, were hired to redesign Chemotrope's whole security system.
00:36:39Mugi and Joe?
00:36:42Yeah, Mugi and Joe got hired by Chemotrope based on the algorithms I came up with.
00:36:46So, if I can compromise their work and tell Chemotrope about it, I'll get a little payback, it'll look good on their resume, and Chemotrope might replace them with me.
00:36:57Yeah, that's great, but did you find out anything about the professor?
00:37:00Well, it's kind of interesting. Chemotrope's official website, there's just one mention of Grimes, but that link is heavily secured on the shadow network.
00:37:09So when I probe deeper...
00:37:12Shit, are you gonna get in trouble?
00:37:16No way, I'm completely stealth.
00:37:22Here it is. At his last job, there was this one incident with a female student. Apparently it caused quite a controversy.
00:37:30Wow.
00:37:32What? Wow, what? You got her pregnant and killed her? What?
00:37:37He shut me out of the system. I've never been shut out of any system.
00:37:46Well, how are we gonna find out about this female student?
00:37:52I don't know, but I gotta admit, for totally egotistical reasons, I hate the thought of Mugi and Joe developing any kind of system.
00:38:01I can't compromise, so...
00:38:09Take this modified thumb drive. It'll give us a backdoor connection to his data files.
00:38:14Just plug it into an empty port anywhere behind Grimes' computer. Like this.
00:38:20What? Break into his office? Are you kidding me?
00:38:23Look, if you're serious about finding out about this guy, then you gotta take some risks.
00:38:27With this, we can suck out every bit of information he has, okay?
00:38:32And...
00:38:36I programmed this card to open up pretty much every security door on campus. It should get you into his office.
00:38:41This, this pretty much makes me a stalker, doesn't it?
00:38:46Oh, this is well beyond stalking, my friend. You are totally pushing the envelope of psychotic behavior.
00:38:52Oh, f***ing go all the way, why go at all, right?
00:38:57Erica! Whoa!
00:39:06Erica! Whoa!
00:39:15Do you know how long I've been waiting for you?
00:39:19It's about time!
00:39:20Erica, what the f***?
00:39:21Erica, what the f***?
00:39:22Where have you been?
00:39:23Where the f*** have you been?
00:39:24Where the f*** have you been?
00:39:25Where the f*** did you get the nerve to ask me that question?
00:39:27You f***ing f***ing else, huh?
00:39:29Oh, listen, listen.
00:39:30You know what?
00:39:31You got the f***ing bad cases of the crazies or something.
00:39:33You know that?
00:39:34Oh, f***!
00:39:35Go toTube malibu with sales.
00:39:37What's that?
00:39:42What else do you want?
00:39:45Where are you on?
00:39:49If you are in the corner, bring you a little bit of a swing.
00:39:54Let us話 you down there.
00:39:57I just took off.
00:39:59For more questions of trader,
00:40:00let me ask you out.
00:40:01остан.
00:40:03Wait, can you?
00:40:04You know what's weird? I definitely got a creep vibe from being around that professor.
00:40:24And I'm sure it has nothing to do with him banging your ex.
00:40:28There's other words besides banging?
00:40:30But they're not as colorful.
00:40:32You find anything?
00:40:34Nothing out of the ordinary.
00:40:36Kinda boring stuff.
00:40:38Lectures, homework assignments, something called Cupid's arrow.
00:40:44What? Let me see that.
00:40:46Wow, talk about information overload.
00:40:50Must be over a thousand files. Where do we start?
00:40:52I don't know.
00:40:56A lot of these files are cryptically encoded.
00:41:00Wow, looks like Moogie and Joe's programming.
00:41:02It would take a while to break it, I can tell you that.
00:41:06But...
00:41:08Looks like some of these files are open.
00:41:10Like these pictures.
00:41:12It's an animal's vomeronasal organ.
00:41:14We studied it in class.
00:41:16Grimes called it the Cupid's gland.
00:41:18It turns airborne pheromones into signals that trigger the sex drive.
00:41:22It's kinda like when a dog...
00:41:24When a dog's in heat. You know? That kind of thing.
00:41:28What?
00:41:30I just never pegged you as someone who could pay attention in class, let alone retaining anything you'd hear.
00:41:35Thanks.
00:41:36Open that one, the one that says TRP2, the movie file.
00:41:39Pheromone receptor, TRP2, ion channel gene, clone from a gerbil.
00:41:49Oh my god, he's done it.
00:42:05Done what? What is all this?
00:42:09He's cloned Cupid's arrow.
00:42:11Grimes has hijacked a circuitry that causes people to fall in love.
00:42:21No way.
00:42:23According to this data, yes way.
00:42:29Sam.
00:42:31Search female subjects.
00:42:41Well, this is kinda creepy.
00:42:45She's not there.
00:42:47Who?
00:42:48Sam, why isn't she there?
00:42:54Wait, you think the nutty professor pumped your ex full of this love juice and that's what made her dump you and jump into bed with him?
00:43:04Yeah, I kinda think he did.
00:43:11You know, you chemistry majors are stranger than any computer geek I've ever known.
00:43:20I mean, we deal in intangibles, like internet , but you Dr. Frankensteins deal in weird disturbing science fiction mutations and crap.
00:43:32What's your problem, Thomas?
00:43:33We need to figure out what's going on here.
00:43:34Oh, I do know what's going on.
00:43:36An Uber corporation like Kemitrope is involved in weird, illegal experiment on human...
00:43:43love glands!
00:43:44I mean, come on now, that's some f***ing s*** for forgetting about Sam.
00:43:47Sam!
00:43:49You're talking about helping out your ex girlfriend?
00:43:51Thomas, she might be in danger.
00:43:52The same ex girlfriend is now f***ing your teacher?
00:43:55Is that the girl you want me to risk being erased by Kemitrops's private security?
00:44:00Uh uh!
00:44:02You're on your own.
00:44:03What's wrong with you, man?
00:44:04I quit.
00:44:05I quit.
00:44:07Thomas!
00:44:16What?
00:44:31Sam.
00:44:32Alan, what are you doing here?
00:44:34Look, I know it's really late. I know it seems rude.
00:44:36Just give me a second, please.
00:44:38Sam.
00:44:39Don't ever get a hand on me.
00:44:40Okay, alright, alright. I'm sorry.
00:44:42Just give me a second. Just hear me out, please.
00:44:45What?
00:44:47Grimes has been experimenting on pheromones.
00:44:50What is that?
00:44:52It's from his computer. It's his research.
00:44:55Alan, did you break into his computer?
00:44:57That's not the point, okay? He's gone off the fucking deep end and he's been experimenting on humans.
00:45:00No, Alan. You've gone off the deep end by breaking into somebody's computer in a jealous rage.
00:45:03Okay, Sam, look. I think there's a good chance that he's experimented on you.
00:45:08I think he's given you some serum that's made you fall in love or at least seem like you fell in love.
00:45:13Love potion, eh?
00:45:14You know, no offense, Sam, but if I did have such a, such a serum, I would have possibly shared it with the entire cheerleading squad. You know what I'm saying?
00:45:32I'll be inside.
00:45:38First thing tomorrow, I'm getting a restraining order against you. And if you ever bother me again, I will have you thrown in jail.
00:45:44Okay, how long ago?
00:45:52Well, no, I'm here now.
00:45:55Okay? Just call me if you've got any problems. Just call me, okay? Thank you.
00:46:00What's this thing about some bleach? I was in the middle of a massage.
00:46:06Not bleach, okay, genius? Breach. We got a little breach of security, so go down to your lab and wait for some help.
00:46:12What do you mean, help?
00:46:13What do you mean, help?
00:46:14I just spoke to some people who are going to run a scan on their computers and check for leaks, so go to your lab.
00:46:19Now, tonight, I got someone waiting for me back in my crib.
00:46:24I don't care what you have waiting for you. If you want to keep banging chicks way above your tax bracket and gene pool, you're going to do as I say. Go.
00:46:31Hold on.
00:46:45What?
00:46:46Hello, Thomas.
00:46:49Moogie? Joe?
00:46:51We need to talk.
00:46:53About what?
00:46:54Did you use one of these on Professor Grimes' computer?
00:46:57F*** you.
00:47:00Come on, Thomas. You've got to let us in.
00:47:02No, I don't.
00:47:03We work with Chematrope now.
00:47:05Oh, like I give a s***.
00:47:06Look, look.
00:47:08We just want to make a deal with you.
00:47:10A deal?
00:47:12Yeah, a deal. A really cool deal.
00:47:15Like what?
00:47:17Like you working for Chematrope.
00:47:27Excuse me. Is Dean Jeffries in?
00:47:30Yes, but he's in a meeting. Do you have an appointment?
00:47:46Dean Jeffrey's in.
00:47:48Yes, but he's in a meeting.
00:47:49Do you have an appointment?
00:47:57Sir, excuse me, young man.
00:47:59Dean, do you have a moment?
00:48:00I'm sorry, Dean.
00:48:01He just ran in here.
00:48:03It's okay, Nora.
00:48:03I can take care of this.
00:48:04You sure?
00:48:06Absolutely.
00:48:07Hold my calls for a little while.
00:48:10Thanks, Dean.
00:48:11I really appreciate you seeing me.
00:48:13I know it seems kind of weird.
00:48:14Yeah, it's kind of weird.
00:48:17But it seems urgent, so what's up?
00:48:21Well, I think Professor Grimes has been conducting experiments
00:48:27on unsuspecting subjects, like students.
00:48:35Alan, I'm concerned about you.
00:48:40Concerned about me?
00:48:41I've been receiving reports all morning about your behavior.
00:48:47My behavior?
00:48:48From who?
00:48:50Well, Professor Grimes.
00:48:53He just filed a complaint that you broke into his computer,
00:48:58which is not only a violation of university policy,
00:49:02but the law as well.
00:49:03No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:49:05Okay.
00:49:06He's upset because I found him out, okay?
00:49:08I've discovered what he's been up to.
00:49:09I've just received a phone call from a Thomas Floyd.
00:49:12A friend, right?
00:49:14Thomas, yeah.
00:49:15He's a friend.
00:49:17Well, Mr. Floyd informed me you came to him,
00:49:21and in retaliation for the professor having an affair
00:49:23with your ex-girlfriend, you asked him to help you fabricate
00:49:28and plant information about fictitious experiments
00:49:32on Professor Grimes' computer.
00:49:35That's okay.
00:49:37Thomas would never lie about me, all right?
00:49:39A faculty member fraternizing with a student
00:49:41is against university policy,
00:49:43and Professor Grimes will be dealt with on this matter.
00:49:46But your actions are more severe.
00:49:55So I'm deciding what's in the best interest of the university
00:49:58and your best interest.
00:50:01And, you know, perhaps that's treatment.
00:50:08Treatment?
00:50:09Are you kidding me?
00:50:11Alan, wait.
00:50:11Don't leave.
00:50:16Maybe he left campus.
00:50:20No, he's got to be around here somewhere.
00:50:22Ladies?
00:50:25Let's go check out the science building.
00:50:26All right.
00:50:27I'll call it in.
00:50:28Cool.
00:50:28Did that girl have the Jamaican accent?
00:50:30She's definitely had a Jamaican booty.
00:50:31It's fine.
00:50:33Hey, I'm the way over.
00:50:34Can you get some balls?
00:50:38Excuse me.
00:50:40Yeah?
00:50:41What's with all the cops?
00:50:43The campus is in lockdown.
00:50:44Something about some psycho guy
00:50:46with a gun stalking his ex-girlfriend.
00:50:50Well, that doesn't sound too good.
00:51:02Erica!
00:51:03Erica!
00:51:05What's the matter with you?
00:51:08What's up?
00:51:08Erica!
00:51:13Erica!
00:51:14You crazy bitch!
00:51:15Come on, I love him!
00:51:17Damn, Alan, you scared the s*** out of me.
00:51:39I'm sorry, man.
00:51:40Just things have gotten a little weird out there for me.
00:51:43Oh, really?
00:51:45Yeah.
00:51:46I'm going to tell you about it.
00:51:46But I had to use the bathroom, bro.
00:51:48It's occupied.
00:51:56What do you want, anyway?
00:52:00I don't know.
00:52:01I just need a place to chill.
00:52:03Seems like everybody's turned on me.
00:52:06Is that right?
00:52:07Yeah.
00:52:08And Dean Jeffrey said that I made you plan evidence in Grimes' computer.
00:52:11Alan, you need to leave.
00:52:23Thomas, did you rat me out or something?
00:52:25I mean it.
00:52:25You gotta go.
00:52:28You did.
00:52:30Just get out.
00:52:32Why, Thomas?
00:52:33Well, did they threaten you?
00:52:35I mean, just tell me.
00:52:35Alan, leave or I'm calling security.
00:52:38You okay, Thomas?
00:52:46Say the word, don't kick his ass.
00:52:49No, Tony.
00:52:50That's okay.
00:52:52He's leaving.
00:52:53Oh, my God.
00:52:57This is your price, Thomas?
00:53:00This is what it takes for you to sell your best friend out?
00:53:06Man, how many times in a grown-up did I save your ass from getting kicked?
00:53:09I gotta warn you, pal.
00:53:11You should leave while you can, because if not, you're going to regret it.
00:53:14I gotta warn you, once whatever Thomas gave you wears off, you're going to regret no shit and stuff, pal.
00:53:27I always had your back, man.
00:53:32I'm sorry.
00:53:40You're missing one elbow party in there, man.
00:53:44We're in the dormitory now.
00:53:52Ah, excuse me.
00:53:53Shit.
00:53:54Did you see a white tail coming running from here?
00:53:57About your height, 5'10".
00:53:59We're in a brown t-shirt, you know?
00:54:02No.
00:54:14Sorry about that, Roger.
00:54:23How'd you know my name?
00:54:25What did that f***, Thomas say about me?
00:54:27Not much, really.
00:54:30Don't f***, Alan.
00:54:32What did he say?
00:54:34How'd you know my name?
00:54:35Your face is all over the campus website.
00:54:48Armed and dangerous?
00:54:49Where'd they get that?
00:54:52Yeah, don't worry.
00:54:53You know they said the same thing about me in my last school?
00:54:56That's why I had to change my identity to come to this university.
00:54:58You're a computer major, right?
00:55:04Yeah, well, I was.
00:55:06Until those jealous a** kicked me out
00:55:09because I had more computer skills in a**
00:55:11than they had in their whole f***ing party.
00:55:13Wait a minute!
00:55:14You didn't tell me what that a** said.
00:55:16Answer me.
00:55:18Well, if I did tell you what he said,
00:55:20he'd kick my a** just on principle.
00:55:21So, no.
00:55:23Yeah, I probably would.
00:55:24So, what'd he say?
00:55:31Well, to put it bluntly,
00:55:34he said you're a neurotic c**t
00:55:36and you're...
00:55:37you're horrible in bed.
00:55:46Horrible in bed?
00:55:49Hmm.
00:55:52Hmm.
00:55:52How would he know
00:55:55he was passed out most of the time?
00:55:58Hey, man.
00:55:59I'm just telling you what he said.
00:56:00I'll kill that f***!
00:56:07You know,
00:56:08you kind of screwed me over, too.
00:56:11Really?
00:56:15Did you sleep with him?
00:56:18No.
00:56:20No, man.
00:56:20It's, it's a, it's a personal thing.
00:56:24But I think there's a way
00:56:25we both
00:56:26and get some revenge.
00:56:31Revenge is good.
00:56:34I'm so in.
00:56:41What's on this?
00:56:42contains incriminating information
00:56:45about Thomas' work
00:56:46with Professor Grimes.
00:56:47I,
00:56:47I can't decipher it.
00:56:49It's all encoded
00:56:49and it's impossible to break.
00:56:51All right.
00:56:52Nothing that Thomas can do
00:56:53that I can't undo.
00:56:57There it is.
00:56:59Ha ha ha.
00:56:59How's that for neurotic?
00:57:01Can you search by name?
00:57:12Yeah, whatever you want.
00:57:14Sam.
00:57:16Samantha Ellis.
00:57:17Oh, that's weird.
00:57:27There's no documents
00:57:28or video clips?
00:57:29Nothing?
00:57:30No.
00:57:31Um, let me see.
00:57:33No.
00:57:34I don't think so.
00:57:35Not that I can see.
00:57:36Nothing.
00:57:36Okay.
00:57:40Um.
00:57:42Search.
00:57:46Cupid's arrow.
00:57:49Side effects.
00:57:59Jesus Christ.
00:58:00What?
00:58:02Well, the detrimental side effects
00:58:03includes depression,
00:58:05paranoia leading to
00:58:06behavior.
00:58:16Okay.
00:58:17Search.
00:58:18Female student romantic relationship.
00:58:35Wait a minute.
00:58:36Thomas took these?
00:58:38He's so not into
00:58:39These aren't his.
00:58:40They belong to Professor Grimes.
00:58:42Oh, yeah.
00:58:43That guy's a total perv.
00:58:45I mean, all professors are, but...
00:58:45Search.
00:58:46Female student.
00:58:48Romantic relationship.
00:58:53This is behavior.
00:58:55Regina Hagerty.
00:59:11Regina Hagerty.
00:59:13Freshman age 19.
00:59:17Committed s***.
00:59:19Just last year.
00:59:24Okay.
00:59:26Okay.
00:59:30Um...
00:59:31What the hell is going on?
00:59:38Grimes developed this drug
00:59:42that controls...
00:59:42that controls...
00:59:43who people fall in love with.
00:59:48And I'm convinced to give it to my girlfriend.
00:59:53My ex-girlfriend.
00:59:55A love potion?
00:59:58I'm wasting my time over a love potion?
01:00:00No.
01:00:01Your girlfriend found someone that she likes to f*** more than you, and you're jealous.
01:00:04Don't.
01:00:05Don't go there.
01:00:08I'm not jealous.
01:00:09This isn't about revenge or anything like that.
01:00:13I'm just worried about the danger she might be in with these...
01:00:16these side effects.
01:00:20Sorry.
01:00:24What are you gonna do?
01:00:27What can I do?
01:00:29I can't go anywhere.
01:00:30I can't go warn her.
01:00:31The cops are outside looking for me.
01:00:42Okay.
01:00:43I think I know somebody who can help us.
01:00:46And I think I've got a way to get you across campus undetected.
01:00:49You're not gonna like it.
01:00:53And what plan is that?
01:01:03You know you're kind of creepy, right?
01:01:07Yeah.
01:01:16Come on.
01:01:17No.
01:01:17Come on.
01:01:18No, man.
01:01:19God damn it.
01:01:19Get out here.
01:01:20This is never gonna work.
01:01:21Looking like a cracked out s***.
01:01:22Stop it.
01:01:24You look great.
01:01:25There.
01:01:26Are you sure your friends can help me, man?
01:01:28Honestly, I have no idea.
01:01:30But do you have any better options?
01:01:33No?
01:01:33No.
01:01:34No.
01:01:35Then let's go.
01:01:41This is so cool.
01:01:44Grimes has taken our barely functional pheromone receptor system and supercharged it by replacing
01:01:49a missing piece here and mapping up something there.
01:01:52And he didn't just create any old pheromone receptor.
01:01:55No, this one's designed to react to pacific pheromone.
01:01:58A pacific pheromone only worn by Professor Grimes.
01:02:02We're gonna get so many girls.
01:02:05Yes.
01:02:05Look, I don't care how many girls you guys get.
01:02:07What's important is helping my friend Sam.
01:02:08You serious about these morons?
01:02:10Morons?
01:02:10What the f***?
01:02:11Whoa, whoa, whoa.
01:02:15Gentlemen, would you care to educate this fool?
01:02:16Chump, old man.
01:02:18We're even weak, chump.
01:02:20We're the youngest and smartest of our class.
01:02:22And already turned down office one of the world's largest pharmaceutical companies.
01:02:26So you got anyone more qualified to help her with this?
01:02:28Go ahead and waste their time.
01:02:31Okay, okay.
01:02:32Look, I'm sorry.
01:02:33I just need you to help her, that's all.
01:02:37Well, what you want us to do is not that simple.
01:02:39You see, Grimes is causing her brain to release dopamine into her system.
01:02:43And that's a fatal flaw in his first search.
01:02:45He's unable to control the artificial flood of dopamine.
01:02:49So, like what happened to the other girl, the dopamine would slowly increase into her brain.
01:02:53More what the brain can handle.
01:02:55So her brain begins to overheat and overload itself with crazy thoughts and agitated paranoia sets in.
01:03:00Agitated paranoia?
01:03:02Cool term.
01:03:03Agitated paranoia sets in and she'll go postal.
01:03:06Only way to relief from her madness.
01:03:12So what do we have to do?
01:03:13Well, you guys don't have to do squat.
01:03:16What we have to do is really not that simple.
01:03:21We have to plug that dopamine pipeline into her brain, but we gotta do it safely.
01:03:28What do you mean safely?
01:03:30Safely?
01:03:31I mean we deal with a brain stem which controls vital functions.
01:03:36Like breathing?
01:03:38Hello.
01:03:39One mistake.
01:03:40One oops.
01:03:41And your girlfriend has an instant organ donor.
01:03:43Oops?
01:03:46What do they mean by oops?
01:03:47Allen, don't worry.
01:03:48These guys are the best chemists at the university.
01:03:50In the world.
01:03:51In the universe.
01:03:52Hey Sam.
01:03:53Allen, why are you dressed like that?
01:03:54Oh, this?
01:03:55It's a disguise.
01:03:56I don't know if you heard it or not, but I'm the new America's most wanted.
01:04:11Did you break into my apartment?
01:04:13Well, not technically.
01:04:14I, uh, I used the keys that you gave me.
01:04:17Get out.
01:04:18Sam, listen to me.
01:04:19Not only am I gonna call the cops, but I'm gonna pay them to beat the shit out of you.
01:04:24Look at these, Sam.
01:04:25Grimes has experimented on other girls.
01:04:27Look, look, look.
01:04:28Here.
01:04:29From his last teaching job, here.
01:04:31Regina.
01:04:32A student like you, who he was involved with, like you, who eventually committed a shit.
01:04:37I'm worried about you.
01:04:38Yeah, Billy told me about her.
01:04:40She was unstable.
01:04:41Yeah, she was unstable because of his experiments.
01:04:44Look, here's the proof.
01:04:45These are his research papers.
01:04:46Look.
01:04:47He infected her without her knowledge.
01:04:49Which led to her depression and vengeful s***.
01:04:51Probably aren't even his documents.
01:04:53What?
01:04:54Billy's been worried that one of his interns, Miller, was using his computer to store information.
01:05:00Those are probably his.
01:05:03Sam, listen to you.
01:05:05It's like Grimes is this mad, cold scientist leader and you're one of his-
01:05:09Hey!
01:05:10I told you to never lay a hand on me.
01:05:12Hey, genius!
01:05:13Who are you?
01:05:15You want to go ahead and use the chloroform or do I have to watch the lady kick your ass
01:05:19all night?
01:05:24Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, enough!
01:05:33Use too much of that shit, it'll get into her liver where it'll metabolize into a phosgene.
01:05:37You know, they used that s*** chemical weapon in World War I.
01:05:44I know things.
01:05:45You son of a b****, don't you ever cheat on me!
01:05:57I will f***ing kill you!
01:06:00What's her problem?
01:06:02Hold it right there.
01:06:04What the hell is going on here?
01:06:07Well, we just came from a costume party in our, uh, friend of yours.
01:06:11She just had too much of drinks.
01:06:12We were just taking her home.
01:06:13Are you sure you're not taking her somewhere to assault her?
01:06:16Oh, please.
01:06:17You really think she's our type?
01:06:27Yeah, well, uh, just make sure you get her home safely, okay?
01:06:31And next time, tell her to watch her alcohol intake.
01:06:34Will do, officer.
01:06:36Oh, and, uh, nice legs, man.
01:06:41Thanks.
01:06:42That's your type, baby.
01:06:43That's all you.
01:06:44You ever kiss me again, I'll rip your f***ing heart out.
01:06:49Don't worry, your pheromones taste like s***.
01:06:56All we have to do is take Grind's special pheromones,
01:06:58link that to ricin toxin, bada bing, bada boom.
01:07:01Easier than mixing Long Island iced tea.
01:07:04Yeah, but have you ever done that before?
01:07:06Yeah.
01:07:07Just Saturday night, the ladies love my Long Island.
01:07:09No, I'm talking about the bottle of toxin you're about to shove up her nose.
01:07:12Are you qualified?
01:07:13Alan, we just drugged and kidnapped your ex-girlfriend.
01:07:19If we stop now, we're going to jail, she's eventually gonna blow her brains out.
01:07:24Okay?
01:07:25Now, if we let them try this, we might not go to jail, and she might not blow her brains out.
01:07:30Is that supposed to make me feel better?
01:07:32Yeah.
01:07:33Yeah.
01:07:34Yeah.
01:07:35Yeah.
01:07:36Yeah.
01:07:37How long will it take?
01:07:38I'm not sure.
01:07:39How long will it take?
01:07:40I'm not sure.
01:07:41Now do we know if it works?
01:07:42How long will it take?
01:07:43How long will it take?
01:07:44How long will it take?
01:07:45I'm not sure.
01:07:46How long will it take?
01:07:47I'm not sure.
01:07:48How long will it take?
01:07:49I'm not sure.
01:07:50How long will it take?
01:07:51I'm not sure.
01:07:52Now do we know if it works?
01:07:56How long will it?
01:07:57I mean, how do we know if he's no longer under his spell?
01:07:59The only way to find out if someone is still attracted to someone is to put both of them
01:08:00together and see what happens.
01:08:17is to put both of them together and see what happens.
01:08:48Hey, Professor. I didn't think you were gonna come, man.
01:08:53Why wouldn't I?
01:08:55I didn't figure out the courage to answer for your diabolical experiments, man.
01:08:59Diabolical experiments.
01:09:02You make me sound like I'm some crazy scientist in some cheesy sci-fi movie.
01:09:08But isn't that what you are?
01:09:12Where's Sam?
01:09:14Over there, in the basement.
01:09:18You brought the police?
01:09:24Smart move, Grimes. You really want the world learning of your experiments, man?
01:09:28What makes you think they're the police?
01:09:33Oh.
01:09:36Take care of this.
01:09:47Uh, you okay, Alan?
01:10:04Yeah, I think so.
01:10:07Too bad.
01:10:09Too bad.
01:10:24God.
01:10:25God.
01:10:28Hey.
01:10:33What's going on, man?
01:10:35What's going on, man?
01:10:37We're in a fucking cage. That's what's going on, man.
01:10:39We never signed up for this when we agreed to help you.
01:10:42Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on.
01:10:44You injected an experimental drug into an unconscious girl without her previous consent and you act like you did nothing wrong?
01:10:49No. We do tons of stuff wrong.
01:10:52But we're smart enough to never get caught.
01:10:53Okay, guys, what are we going to do? Can we please focus on that?
01:10:57Do you have any bright ideas?
01:11:01I don't know. Where are we?
01:11:04We're in a cage, dumbass.
01:11:06I know that, but where is this cage? Are we still on campus?
01:11:09Well, we tell you, but they put a hood over our head when they grabbed us.
01:11:14Where's Sam?
01:11:22I'm sorry, man. Those guys had guns, okay? They had...
01:11:32Wait a minute. Those guys had guns.
01:11:33Yeah? So?
01:11:38So, if we can over...
01:11:43If we can overpower one of the guards and get their guns, we can shoot our way out of here.
01:11:50Roger, you lost your fucking mind, man. We're all going to...
01:11:52I'm down with debt.
01:11:54Hell yeah. This show was .
01:11:56What's wrong?
01:12:04Hello? Somebody, we need your help, please. My friend is really sick, please.
01:12:08Somebody, come on, please.
01:12:10Oh, thank you so much. Thank you.
01:12:12I'm sorry, my friend. He's right there. He's just really sick.
01:12:14If you think I'm s***ing enough to fall for that s***, I'll blow your s*** all apart just for insulting.
01:12:21Okay.
01:12:22Okay.
01:12:29Hey, Alan.
01:12:35Where's Sam?
01:12:37Trust me. I'm working on that.
01:12:42Roger, did you decide for Grimes' cryptic files in, what, a second?
01:12:48I don't know what you're talking about.
01:12:51We went through your room and found all your deciphering equipment.
01:12:57Pretty impressive.
01:13:01Derek, Darren, you two have been keeping busy.
01:13:05There isn't one research project the two of you have ever been involved in that would be considered even remotely legal.
01:13:13Sir, you aren't mistaken. You must be confused with someone else.
01:13:17Impressive work, gentlemen.
01:13:19Thomas!
01:13:21Where's Sam?
01:13:23Let's go get her.
01:13:47Uh, I'm sorry. What the hell are they doing here?
01:13:55Chematrope requested it.
01:13:58Since when have you become so tight with Chematrope?
01:14:01Well, since I convinced them they could run their research department a lot more efficiently than they're currently doing.
01:14:07So, what are you implying?
01:14:09I'm implying I found out how much you've gone over budget on this Cupid's Arrow project, and how it might have caused a girl suicide, and possibly an ugly publicity nightmare for the company.
01:14:20So what? The company's made a killing on spinning bad press.
01:14:23Well, probably so. But they're also concerned about the profitability of what research they're covering up, and yours is looking like a bad investment.
01:14:34Well, my work and research is coming along fine. In fact, it's progressing right on schedule.
01:14:39Is it? You sure your research hasn't hit a wall? I mean, it has according to my friends. Isn't that right, gentlemen?
01:14:47Oh, yeah. Absolutely.
01:14:49In fact, Professor, it's the twins that came up with the missing element that corrected the flaws in your research.
01:14:54They developed a way to control the side effects as well as a way to turn off Cupid's Arrow.
01:14:59We'll figure it out in seconds.
01:15:00You've been faster than that.
01:15:02Exactly. And if they did overcome the problems in your research, then Chemotrope would be interested in meeting them.
01:15:08That's ridiculous, okay? There's no proof they understood or even comprehended my research, let alone manipulated it.
01:15:14All right. You want the proof? I'll show you the proof.
01:15:19We'll just ask her. We'll ask her how she feels.
01:15:24Really?
01:15:30Sam. Sam, wake up. Sam.
01:15:49How do you feel?
01:15:53My head hurts. Your cologne isn't helping either.
01:15:57Sam.
01:16:01Sam.
01:16:05Do you love me?
01:16:10Ellen.
01:16:12I already told you I found somebody else.
01:16:17I know you found somebody else, but did you really find somebody that could replace me?
01:16:22Somebody that makes you feel the way I make you feel?
01:16:24I know.
01:16:38Sorry, kid.
01:16:45Hey, that's disgusting, okay? Clearly she's still a little drugged up from whatever the hell you ejected her with.
01:16:50Sam.
01:16:53I'm sorry, okay? It's gonna be all right. I'll take care of you.
01:16:56Oh, ah!
01:16:58Oh, ah!
01:16:59Sorry, kissing you just sort of makes me nauseous.
01:17:09Oh, ah!
01:17:11Sorry, kissing you just sort of makes me nauseous.
01:17:14You know, Professor, it's not nice to mess with Mother Nature.
01:17:27You know what, Mother Nature.
01:17:28Okay, what is that bitch about love?
01:17:30Jesus Christ, for, for, since the beginning of time she's been bringing together couples that have no business being together.
01:17:33Yeah, that's right, people who just drive each other nuts and who make each other's lives miserable.
01:17:38All I'm trying to do for God's sakes is bring a little order to romance, people.
01:17:42Is that so wrong?
01:17:44Huh?
01:17:45A little rational thought to the people that we want to spend the rest of our lives with?
01:17:58Rational thought?
01:17:59In love?
01:18:01Sounds kind of boring to me, Professor.
01:18:03Yeah.
01:18:05Boring to you, I'm sure it is.
01:18:08Well, I don't know.
01:18:10I don't know.
01:18:11I don't know.
01:18:13I don't know.
01:18:15I don't know.
01:18:17I don't know.
01:18:19I don't know.
01:18:21I don't know.
01:18:23I don't know.
01:18:24I don't know.
01:18:26I don't know.
01:18:27I don't know.
01:18:28I don't know.
01:18:29It was like this overwhelming craving for him.
01:18:32Well, I gotta tell you, it kind of hurt me a little bit.
01:18:36What I thought it took was a drug for you to fall in love with someone else.
01:18:40You could look at it like that.
01:18:43Or you could look at it like I would have to start taking drugs to fall in love with someone else.
01:18:49Hey, Alan.
01:18:51Can I bother you for a second?
01:18:54Be right back.
01:18:55How's your secret chemotrope society doing?
01:18:56You make it sound like a bad thing.
01:18:57Yeah, but how'd you get away with it?
01:18:58I mean, how'd you keep all the witnesses quiet?
01:18:59It was easy.
01:19:00We hired them.
01:19:02And what about Roger?
01:19:03He ate your guts.
01:19:04What about Roger?
01:19:05And what about Roger?
01:19:06He ate you guts.
01:19:09How are you doing?
01:19:11You make it sound like a bad thing.
01:19:13Yeah, but how'd you get away with it?
01:19:15I mean, how'd you keep all the witnesses quiet?
01:19:17It was easy.
01:19:19We hired them.
01:19:26And what about Roger?
01:19:28He ate your guts.
01:19:39Well, that makes sense.
01:19:42Alan, I'm...
01:19:46I'm sorry I sold you out.
01:19:51I guess I had a momentary lapse in priorities.
01:19:57Believe me, I've never forgotten you've always had my back.
01:20:02You have to know that I'll always have yours.
01:20:06Okay?
01:20:22What was that all about?
01:20:24It's nothing.
01:20:25Just, uh, two friends talking.
01:20:30You know, with everything that's going on, I've been meaning to ask you something.
01:20:36How exactly did you fall in love with me in the first place?
01:20:42Alan, does it really matter why?
01:20:46Remember from class?
01:20:48Love is an irrational, primitive thing.
01:20:52Don't try to figure it out.
01:20:54Just enjoy it.
01:20:58That's deep.
01:21:01That's love.
01:21:05I would've practiced it.
01:21:07Spokes on,鎖 RSX to leave me.
01:21:10I thought what it was just a night reveal.
01:21:15So don't keep me wet.
01:21:18And I knew what it was just a night reveal.
01:21:20It was really the Ace.
01:21:22I shared that the familyzone,
01:21:23and it was just a night reveal.
01:21:26It Happy New Year,
01:21:27It's a Twin заключ gathering.
01:21:30I eat it who doesn't try.
01:21:33Just stay
01:21:44We both know you want a little taste
01:21:48And I just don't have the time to waste
01:21:51On subtlety, baby
01:21:54True
01:21:56I'll stay if you ask me to
01:22:01I'm not gonna lie to you
01:22:04I really need a night with you
01:22:08Yeah
01:22:09All I wanted was just a night with you
01:22:14A night with you, baby
01:22:16All I wanted was just a night with you
01:22:21So don't keep me waiting
01:22:23All I wanted was just a night with you
01:22:27A night with you, baby
01:22:29All I wanted was just a night with you
01:22:33So don't keep me waiting
01:22:36Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't keep me waiting
01:22:43Once more
01:22:51And I really like the clothing you wore
01:22:54But they look better on my battle floor
01:22:58If you know what I mean
01:23:00True
01:23:03True
01:23:04I'll stay if you ask me to
01:23:08I'm not gonna lie to you
01:23:11A night with you, baby
01:23:12All I wanted was just a night with you
01:23:17So don't keep me waiting
01:23:19All I wanted was just a night with you
01:23:24A night with you, baby
01:23:26All I wanted was just a night with you
01:23:29All I wanted was just a night with you
01:23:31So don't keep me waiting
01:23:33All I wanted was just a night with you
01:23:37A night with you, baby
01:23:39All I wanted was just a night with you
01:23:43So don't keep me waiting
01:23:56All I wanted was just a night with you
01:24:00Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't keep me waiting
01:24:04You
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