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00:00If you are trying to play your own enemy, how can I help?
00:05I want to go for higher studies, mostly in abroad.
00:08But at the same time, I feel a little bit of responsibility towards my family.
00:12They are not emotionally prepared to send me so far from them.
00:15What is meant by emotional lack of preparation in sending the girl abroad?
00:20That means they want their child to be with them.
00:22Are you with them right now?
00:24Right now I am with them.
00:25Where are they?
00:26It is like...
00:28Where are they?
00:28When we are living abroad, it's not completely...
00:31We are not free that much there.
00:32We are having weekends, okay?
00:34We are having weekends here also.
00:36Convince yourself, don't convince me.
00:37Because it's not this track.
00:39The track is something else.
00:41Often, in the name of financial pressure,
00:44what we are really kneeling down to is something else.
00:47We are just fresh out of our session with Acharya Prashant, sir.
00:51And I am really honoured to be part of it.
00:53Usually when you think of spiritual or philosophical speakers,
00:56you don't have a pretty good image in mind.
00:57Yeah, I was just trying to add on to her point that maybe going abroad,
01:01she also feels responsibility for her parents.
01:04And she might also feel selfish for leaving them alone.
01:07Had I had a daughter, she would have been your age.
01:09How old am I?
01:10Do I look that frail, that old, that I need a daughter to lean on?
01:14Do I?
01:15So, yes.
01:16The option that you said of immediately taking up a job,
01:19that is a viable option.
01:21But the question is, why is a particular option being chosen?
01:27All his answers and his beautiful responses to our question
01:31just gave us a lot of insight that we would not have come to conclusion on our own.
01:36So, again, NIT is very, very honoured to have him in our presence today.
01:41Good evening, sir.
01:48So, my question basically revolves around responsibility.
01:54Even though you talk a lot about responsibility,
01:56but I was not very much satisfied with it.
01:59So, I am a final year student and I want to pursue my career in higher studies.
02:05I want to go for higher studies, mostly in abroad.
02:08But at the same time, I feel a little bit of responsibility,
02:13both financially and emotionally, towards my family.
02:17I want to start earning soon so that I can support them.
02:21Even though they never restricted me from doing further studies,
02:25but they are like, they are not emotionally prepared to send me so far from them.
02:32And while I was in this dilemma,
02:35What is meant by emotional lack of preparation in sending a girl away?
02:40Not a girl, they are a child.
02:42You are a girl.
02:44Right?
02:44We will be specific.
02:45Yes.
02:46What is meant by emotional lack of preparation in sending the girl abroad?
02:51What exactly does that mean?
02:52We don't want any vagueness.
02:55Very specifically, yes.
02:57What is meant by that?
02:58That means they want their child to be with them.
03:01Are you with them right now?
03:02Right now I am with them.
03:03Where are they?
03:05It is like...
03:06Where are they?
03:08Where are they?
03:09I can be there anytime.
03:11Even if you are abroad, you can be there anytime.
03:13Still you will be taking a flight.
03:15From there also you will be taking a flight.
03:17From here the flight is three hours.
03:19From there it is eight hours.
03:20That's all.
03:21But sir, it is not that much easy.
03:23What do you mean by that?
03:26You go to the airport, you take the boarding pass, you take your seat.
03:35It is that easy.
03:41No sir, it is like...
03:43It is something else.
03:45Yes, it is something else.
03:46What is something else?
03:47Tell me.
03:47Like when we are living abroad, it is not completely...
03:51We are not free that much there.
03:53Okay, we are having weekends, okay.
03:54We are having weekends here also.
03:56We can go there and...
03:58Convince yourself, don't convince me.
03:59Because it is not this track.
04:01The track is something else.
04:03Yes, in fact you have more holidays there than you have here.
04:07Finance is also some issue sir.
04:10Like tickets...
04:10You earn more there if the ticket is expensive.
04:14Your earning too is higher there.
04:17Expenses are also higher there.
04:19Yes, okay.
04:20Salary is also higher here.
04:21Expenses are also higher sir.
04:23Okay, you save more.
04:25That's why people go abroad, right?
04:27Because they save more there.
04:28And then they remit.
04:30They save so much that they send back to their country.
04:33But what I was telling, I want to go for higher studies, not for a job.
04:38Right.
04:38So, I do have a little expenses there.
04:42So, it is not easy for me to travel that much frequently.
04:46So, then the problem you are stating is, it is not India versus abroad.
04:51It is versus immediate earning versus two years of delay.
04:56Yeah.
04:57Versus two years of delay.
04:58It boils down to this then.
05:00Okay.
05:01Right.
05:01So, how big is the financial crunch at home?
05:06It is big.
05:08It is big then you must take up a job.
05:11But what about dreams?
05:13You should not talk about it.
05:18Dreams are meant to be put under the shoe and squashed.
05:24So, like should I remove this stuff from my life?
05:29Yeah, I cannot do it for you.
05:31First of all, you have to admit that you want to stand up for what you think right.
05:35I can't do it for you.
05:37If you are trying to play, your own enemy, how can I help?
05:48The arguments that you are forwarding are all arguments of the lawyer practicing against you.
05:57Sir, you still haven't heard my full question.
06:01Okay, please tell.
06:03Can I take the book there?
06:04Yes, yes.
06:05No, no, don't quote from the book.
06:08The author is here.
06:09The book is not needed.
06:10So, it is basically, if duty feels heavy, it was never truly yours.
06:18Authentic responsibility uplifts, fake responsibility enslaves.
06:24So, why are you quitting from this chapter?
06:26It is a very dangerous chapter.
06:28It is saying, if duty feels happy, it was never truly yours.
06:32And don't read that chapter.
06:34I just wanted to ask, what is the basic difference between authentic responsibility and emotional attachment?
06:42See, I'll tell you.
06:44I was in the same seat once.
06:48After my MBA, I worked in the corporate for three years.
06:52I had an education loan to pay and some other financial liabilities.
06:57But that was the fact.
06:59And I was utterly convinced that there is no option.
07:04But to take up a job, if I want to clear myself of the monetary burden.
07:08So, I did take up a job.
07:10But that was not to meet somebody else's expectations.
07:16So, yes.
07:18The option that you said of immediately taking up a job.
07:21That is a viable option.
07:23But the question is, why is a particular option being chosen?
07:29Yes, you can choose to forsake your studies and maybe work now.
07:32So, maybe go for further studies three or four years later.
07:36Even that is possible.
07:39But the question is, whether the arguments that you are presenting are truthful.
07:44That is the question.
07:46In the sense that I really did have a financial liability.
07:50There was a bank standing on my head.
07:53And there were heavy EMI's to be paid.
07:54So, there was a real, real financial burden.
07:58Is the burden equally real in your case?
08:02If it is, then proceed.
08:05Sir, can you please explain what is this word, authentic responsibility?
08:09There is no need.
08:10If the burden is real, then you must give up on your desire to study further.
08:17Because one must not live in debt, frankly.
08:21If there is a real debt to clear, then you must proceed, clear the debt, or find out a way
08:28where you can study while clearing your debt.
08:34Maybe there is a place that offers you a scholarship.
08:37Maybe.
08:37I don't know.
08:38Maybe you can find a way to work part-time.
08:41I don't know.
08:42You will have to figure that out.
08:45But, I might be totally wrong, but my hunch is often, in the name of financial pressure,
08:52what we are really kneeling down to, is something else.
08:57But, because that something else, is not nice enough to be named, what we quote is financial pressure.
09:11I might be wrong.
09:12Only you know what your domestic situation is.
09:16And, only you know, what is that debt figure that you need to clear.
09:20I knew my figure.
09:21And, I knew, as a fact, that this is the number of months I need to work.
09:27This is the kind of salary I need to draw.
09:30And, I will then be totally free.
09:32And, I worked with discipline.
09:35I earned my salary.
09:36I cleared my debt.
09:39I established the organization, immediately after that.
09:47So, is it a fake responsibility?
09:49I don't know.
09:49Only you can know.
09:50How do I know your balance sheet?
09:54How do I know what really is the amount that you are carrying in your head?
09:58How do I know?
10:01You have to be honest towards yourself.
10:04Please.
10:05Very honest.
10:07Huh?
10:08Well, I was carrying out one, but multiple loans.
10:12But, I said, and they were supposed to be cleared off in eight years.
10:18I settled them in three years flat.
10:19So, if that honesty is there, then any decision that you take will be great.
10:35If that honesty is not there, then we can have supporting arguments for any kind of decision.
10:43Figure out how much money is really needed at home.
10:49Really.
10:51And, how much is a mere demand or a desire?
10:55What I needed to the bank was something that really needed to be paid.
10:59What you are thinking of paying at home, how much of that is a real need?
11:04And, how much of that is a mere demand or desire or expectation?
11:09You need to be sorted out in that.
11:10I'll also add on to that.
11:17Maybe that, what she also wants to say is that, that responsibility comes from her too.
11:23Like, she wants to take care of her parents and while going abroad, she might seem selfish
11:28for leaving them all alone.
11:32Why aren't you speaking?
11:34So, why aren't you uttering this?
11:38Huh?
11:38I didn't give you a chance.
11:39This big a mic you are carrying, as big as mine.
11:47Then, there will be more questions that you will need to ask yourself.
11:50How many siblings?
11:52Three.
11:53How come all the responsibility has fallen on the girl's head?
12:00I am the?
12:01Middle child.
12:03Neither the eldest nor the smallest.
12:08What rule of existence puts it all on the middle one?
12:14Sir, it does not depend on like...
12:16How many brothers, how many sisters?
12:18Elder brother and younger sister.
12:20Elder brother, younger sister.
12:21So, lot of diversity in everything.
12:24And yet, everything is falling upon you squarely.
12:26How come?
12:28Like, they are not forcing anything.
12:30Nothing is ever forced.
12:31Yes, sir.
12:31That would look ugly.
12:33That would look ugly.
12:34Nothing is ever forced in a tangible way.
12:41I am allowing myself to look ugly.
12:43So that I can counter ugliness.
12:46Who will want to push you in an ugly way?
12:48The husband pushes the wife for sex.
12:56Does he do that in an ugly way?
12:58No.
12:58The way is kept fine.
13:00The desire is something else.
13:03The way is alright.
13:04Oh, I love you so much.
13:05Come to the bed.
13:06Or I have brought this new jewelry thing for you.
13:08Come to the bed.
13:09The way is kept sweet, gentle, polite, loving in appearance.
13:16But there is something else at work inwardly.
13:19What is that thing?
13:20That's what you have to uncover.
13:21Can you repeat your point, Devika?
13:30Because you are add on.
13:32Yeah, I was just trying to add on to her point.
13:34That maybe going abroad,
13:36she also feels responsibility for her parents.
13:39And she might also feel selfish for leaving them alone.
13:43Okay, tell me.
13:44You know the kind of country we are moving to become.
13:48It is for a reason that you want to go abroad.
13:54How is it not love towards your parents?
13:57If you manage to get a footing there,
14:00and within a few years,
14:01you are able to take your parents.
14:06Won't they have a better time?
14:11Won't they get to spend their old age
14:14in a better way abroad?
14:18So, you will be spending time with them.
14:20A lot of time, right?
14:24They will be close to retiring now.
14:28Right?
14:29If you are settled there,
14:30why can't you call them for a few months every year
14:33and be with them?
14:35Five months, six months every year.
14:36Why not?
14:40Why not?
14:42Because that happens.
14:43My all, 80% of my batchmates,
14:46they are all abroad.
14:46Right?
14:48And they call their parents there.
14:50Some have permanently called their parents there.
14:54Before like getting settled there,
14:57there comes a point when you are jobless there
14:58and you are still studying there.
15:01So, that's the main...
15:02That's why what happened now?
15:03Parents won't be that old, right?
15:07How old are you?
15:09I'm 21.
15:10I'm 21.
15:11Had I had a daughter,
15:12she would have been your age.
15:13How old am I?
15:14How old am I?
15:19Do I look that frail,
15:21that old,
15:21that I need a daughter to lean on?
15:25Do I?
15:28What is it about supporting the old father?
15:31That's me.
15:33Come to support me,
15:34then I'll push you away.
15:39You said,
15:40if we are clear about something,
15:41if we understand,
15:43it will happen.
15:44So, if someone is
15:46thinking of some imaginary obstacles,
15:50they are making it,
15:51they have a lawyer against themselves,
15:52as you said.
15:53They are making it,
15:54they are convincing themselves
15:55that we will not do it.
15:57So, I believe first,
15:58it's very difficult then,
15:59very, very difficult,
16:00very difficult.
16:02Once somebody is arguing
16:04against herself,
16:06it becomes an impossible battle
16:07to assist in.
16:10You may stand there as a helper,
16:12but how can you help someone
16:14who is hell-bent
16:15on defeating herself
16:17or himself?
16:19No gender bias, sorry.
16:25I face this daily.
16:26At some point,
16:29I actually feel like giving up.
16:34Hello, Namaskaram sir.
16:36Sir, my question is,
16:38what is the real definition
16:39of living an outrageous life?
16:41Like you today mentioned
16:42in this talk.
16:47It's outrageous to those
16:50who stare at it
16:51from the stands.
16:56For you,
16:57it is just very natural.
17:00Life which is natural
17:02to the free one,
17:04will definitely look
17:06outrageous to the unfree ones.
17:09So, you don't really
17:10have to live
17:10outrageously.
17:11You simply have to live
17:13naturally,
17:14freely, lovingly.
17:16But when you live this way,
17:18then the bystanders,
17:20they will all quip.
17:22Oh, such an outrageous person.
17:26What an outrageous life.
17:29Wild,
17:30mad,
17:31eccentric.
17:33You'll be taunted
17:34like that.
17:37It will be outrageous
17:38not to you.
17:39To you,
17:39it will appear simple.
17:41The right life
17:42is a simple life.
17:44The life of
17:45like Bhagatse
17:46and those people.
17:47Isn't it outrageous?
17:48It is outrageous
17:48to those who
17:50look at it from afar.
17:51Oh my God!
17:54Parents will say,
17:55no, no, no, no, no.
17:55My son should not
17:56become like Bhagat Singh.
17:57Otherwise,
17:57he'll be hanged at 22.
18:00What an outrageous life
18:01Bhagat Singh lived.
18:02But to Bhagat Singh,
18:03his life was simple,
18:04cool,
18:05natural,
18:05free.
18:11Nice.
18:12I got it.
18:18Hi,
18:19my name is Rick Bhandari.
18:20I have been connected
18:22with Acharya Ji
18:23for the last
18:24four years almost.
18:26My journey with him
18:27started
18:27via YouTube.
18:30I started
18:30perusing his videos
18:32on YouTube
18:33and YouTube
18:34gave me a good exposure
18:35to Acharya Ji's
18:37views on a lot
18:39of societal matters.
18:40Veganism,
18:42environmental
18:43awareness.
18:44also he was
18:45nudging in those videos
18:48to go beyond
18:49and discover
18:51who I am
18:53or who we are,
18:54what is the truth
18:55behind all of this.
18:58During that time,
18:59I got contacted
19:00by the Gita community
19:01volunteers
19:02and they
19:03motivated me
19:05and encouraged me
19:07to join the Gita community
19:08through the app
19:09and that was
19:11a turning point
19:11in my journey.
19:13I can clearly say
19:14that
19:15I wasn't sure
19:17what I would get
19:17out of
19:18the app,
19:20the Gita community
19:21when I began
19:21but after a few months
19:23when I started
19:24going through
19:25the contents
19:26of that community
19:26and especially
19:27the words of
19:28Visitor
19:28that Acharya Ji
19:29has shared
19:30on the Vedanta,
19:32Upanishads,
19:34Ashtavakla Gita,
19:36Bhagavad Gita,
19:37they are a true
19:38revelation
19:38in our time.
19:39In this day and age,
19:40I don't think
19:41anyone has given
19:42more clarity
19:43and spoken
19:44more directly
19:45about these
19:46epics
19:48with that level
19:48of clarity.
19:50I think that is
19:51priceless wisdom
19:52that is lying
19:53in the Gita community
19:55and on that app
19:55which isn't available
19:57anywhere else.
19:58I have gone
19:58through a lot
19:59of lecturers,
20:00a lot of gurus,
20:01a lot of ashrams
20:02heard a lot
20:03of people
20:03but the amount
20:04of clarity
20:04that Acharya Ji
20:05was able
20:07to provide
20:07to me
20:08through his
20:09assimilated lectures
20:10on the Gita community
20:11that is
20:13absolutely priceless
20:15and I am
20:17indebted
20:18to him
20:19greatly for that.
20:21So from my
20:22perspective,
20:22now whoever I meet
20:23and they say
20:24that I'm listening
20:24to Acharya Prasanth
20:25or I know
20:26who Acharya Prasanth
20:26is,
20:27I tell them
20:27try out the app
20:29because the app
20:29is at a nominal
20:30cost these days.
20:31They have reduced
20:32the cost substantially
20:33and what lies
20:35in there
20:35is truly priceless,
20:37it's truly revolutionary.
20:38If you are interested
20:39in diving deeper,
20:41please,
20:42the YouTube videos
20:43are only
20:43the topmost layer.
20:45There is an ocean
20:46behind,
20:47underneath
20:47and that ocean
20:48lies on the community.
20:50On the community,
20:51Acharya Ji comes
20:52live every day.
20:53He does a Q&A session.
20:55We get to
20:56understand his
20:57views on present day
20:59topics as well
21:00but what he has
21:02assimilated in that app
21:04in terms of
21:05his curated lectures,
21:06it's truly priceless
21:07wisdom.
21:08I don't think
21:09that is available
21:09anywhere else
21:10and there are
21:12no words
21:13that I can say
21:13to motivate people
21:15to just go
21:15and try it out.
21:17It is truly phenomenal.
21:19So if you are
21:19in this journey,
21:20I will ask you
21:21definitely try out
21:22that Gita community.
21:24The lectures on there
21:25are priceless
21:26and they are
21:27revolutionary
21:27in every essence
21:29of its word.
21:30Thank you Acharya Ji
21:31for doing this
21:31to me
21:32and for doing
21:33this for all of us.
21:34Namaste.
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