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00:00Tubeless, groovy gricks, brainy sages, need a miss in middle ages, gory stories, we do that, and your host a talking rat, the past is no longer a mystery, welcome to Horrible Histories, Horrible Histories presents, Hair Raising Holidays,
00:21Ah, who doesn't love going on their hollybobs by the sea, I adore a trip to the beach with my family, and King George III was the same, he especially loved holidaying in the British seaside town of Weymouth, although his family was slightly less keen on the trips, oh no, this happens every time, my hair is not a nest,
00:46Family on tour, so excited, okay dad, tell us where we are, oh well, we are in Dorset, on a royal family holiday, going to the best town ever, what could be better girls than going to, Weymouth,
01:02Er, not going to Weymouth, that would be better, Weymouth is more dull and stupid than I can find words to express, you're the king, father, we could literally go anywhere,
01:12Ah, I know, which is why we're doing a special surprise stop on the way, it better not be a farm,
01:19Ooh, hello biggies, isn't it great, I love farms, I can't believe you're my sister, I stepped in something, oh, did you like a farm,
01:36Now I'm bored and I smell of cows, right, girls, let's do a bit of Weymouth shopping shall we, shop till we drop, that'll cheer you up,
01:47It's half past five in the morning daddy, I know, that's why I had my favourite shop Delamote, open specially, look at the shopkeeper, loves getting up at 5am,
01:55This holiday's almost as bad as last year's, in fact, it is as bad, it's the same exact holiday, again, although I guess last year's was a bit worse, because we had to go on a boat trip,
02:06Boat trip?
02:10Quite bad,
02:11I've got nothing less than me to throw up,
02:15It's all the excitement of being on a boat, just loving it,
02:20I think it's safe to say that was a huge success,
02:26Hey, it's Father with no miserable,
02:32Fine, I give up, never again,
02:36Really, Father, thank you,
02:38Brush your teeth, house,
02:39Now we can find somewhere else to holiday, finally,
02:42No, no, I meant we'll never do the boat trip again, we'll definitely come back to Weymouth,
02:45Yay!
02:46Weymouth is cool,
02:48Weymouth!
02:49Hello, Holiday Makers,
02:53Queen Victoria here,
02:55Queen of Great Britain and Ireland,
02:56Empress of India,
02:58and massive fan of going on hollybobs.
03:01In addition to ruling and having lots of children,
03:03I did like to be beside the seaside.
03:06I was a particularly big fan of going wading in the sea.
03:10My husband, Albert, even persuaded me that the salty water was good for my health.
03:15But tell me,
03:16What special bit of equipment did I like to use when I went to the sea?
03:20Was it A, an extendable ramp so that I didn't have to stick on any pebbles,
03:25B, a big shed on wheels,
03:28or C, an inflatable golden seahorse called Sebastian?
03:32The answer was B, a big shed on wheels called a bathing machine, like this one.
03:40It would be wheeled into the sea with me inside it, so then I could get out into the water without
03:45prying eyes watching me and splash around a bit.
03:48Hmm, and let me tell you, this ride was pimped.
03:52It's got a changing room in there and curtains that go around the front, so I couldn't be seen.
03:57And there's even a royal working toilet inside.
04:02I might be the queen, but I do not royal weave in the sea.
04:07Unless it's an emergency.
04:13Excuse me, Monica on the move.
04:17Agatha? Agatha? That can be you.
04:22What brings you to Hawaii?
04:27You, Agatha, I published your books and we're expecting another one.
04:31I did not expect to find you, Agatha Christie, detective writer, on a beach in a...
04:36The bathing suit, John.
04:37Whatever it is, it's not a book, and that's what we need.
04:40People need more Poirot. I've been trying to get a hold of you for weeks.
04:43Well, you've caught me, red-handed.
04:45Why are you even here?
04:47Because of that little lady over there, Jonathan.
04:49I can't see anyone. Is it Miss Marple?
04:51The sea, John.
04:53Do you know what this is?
04:54Uh, an insole for a very big shoe?
04:57It's a surfboard, John. I've been learning to surf.
05:00So, what are you now? A surfer?
05:02Could we at least fix a typewriter on this thing?
05:04I'm still a groundbreaking crime novelist, John.
05:07I've just discovered a totally epic new hobby while on my vacation.
05:11Well, you know what would be totally epic, Agatha?
05:15A new book.
05:16I do have a new idea for a book.
05:18Oh, great.
05:19It's about a British prince.
05:21Terrific.
05:22Who gets murdered.
05:23Intriguing.
05:24While surfing in Hawaii.
05:26Oh, that's ridiculous.
05:27People simply won't take you seriously if you keep telling tales about surfing princes.
05:33Good work.
05:34John, have you met the Prince of Wales?
05:36What is hell, your wonderful majesty?
05:41Chill, bro.
05:42Oh, it's awesome out there, Agatha.
05:44I just stood up on the board.
05:45I think I'm the first British dude to do it.
05:48Check this out.
05:50Woo-hoo!
05:52Later, bro.
05:54Tell me more about this royal murder story, then.
05:56How does it start?
05:57Well, the prince is in the water and there may be a shock.
06:00Your royal highness, watch out!
06:10It's true.
06:11Famous crime writer, Agatha Christie, really did get hooked on surfing.
06:15And her surfboard really was called Fred.
06:18When I go abroad on my holes, as well as souvenir hunting in their exotic bins and sewers,
06:26I love a bit of sightseeing.
06:28And people in the past did, too.
06:30Alexander the Great once actually took a break from waiting a war
06:35so he could go and visit the tomb of his hero,
06:38the legendary Greek warrior Achilles.
06:40Oh, oh, they're emptying the bins.
06:42Got to get a snap.
06:43Oh, oh, the bins.
06:47Hi, all-fair Alexander.
06:50Welcome to the ruins of ancient Troy.
06:53Thanks, buddy.
06:54We're actually on our way to attack the Persian Empire,
06:56but we couldn't resist a little Holiday and Troy on the way.
06:59All war and no play makes Alexander the Great a dull and yet still strangely awesome emperor.
07:04Well, let me be your tour guide to this historic ruin.
07:08All I ask is the honor of your company.
07:10And also a large bag of coins.
07:13Wait, what do you want to see?
07:14Show me the resting place of Achilles,
07:16the greatest of the Greek warriors and hero of the Trojan War.
07:20Behold, the tomb of Achilles.
07:23Oh, it's right there, bro.
07:25I can't believe I'm stood right in front of the actual tomb of Achilles, Hephaestion.
07:30Look.
07:31Yeah, I'm looking.
07:32It's great, bro.
07:33I really like Achilles.
07:35Oh, yeah.
07:35Yeah, massive fan.
07:36I even sleep with a dagger under my pillow, just like he did.
07:39You know, I always tell Hephaestion, if I have an Achilles heel,
07:42it's probably how much I love Achilles.
07:45Yeah, he's always saying that, bro.
07:47Oh, it's good to meet someone who respects the legends of Troy.
07:50Just a bit.
07:51Might have to pour a load of oil over the tomb in tribute.
07:53Oh, there he goes.
07:55Probably you don't need that much oil.
07:57You know what?
07:58Gonna crown it in garlands, too.
07:59Garlands and oil!
08:00Well, do we have to spend all day at the tomb of Achilles, bro?
08:03Uh, yeah.
08:04In fact, I'm gonna run around it naked.
08:07Race you, Hephaestion.
08:08Does he do this a lot?
08:09Yeah, you better join in.
08:11Otherwise, he gets a bit grumpy.
08:13Oh, watch out for the oil!
08:14Oh!
08:15Oh!
08:17Ha!
08:18Who wants to go and look at famous landmarks when you can look at me?
08:22Yes, when I, the great emperor Napoleon Bonaparte, was captured at Waterloo,
08:27the impressive sight the people traveled to see was me!
08:31And I don't blame them.
08:32I am a rather handsome chap.
08:35Go on, treat yourself to an imperial close-up.
08:38It's 1815 and thousands of people have gathered in hundreds of small boats
08:46to catch a glimpse of the captured French emperor Napoleon.
08:51Welcome to Goggle Boats.
08:58Hello, Booney!
09:00Oh, he looks smashing!
09:02Totally worth traveling all the way from Glasgow.
09:04Oh, totally.
09:05Don't you like a man in uniform?
09:07Do you like a man who's been fighting Britain for the last 23 years?
09:11If he's in uniform, yeah.
09:15I mean, it's good, but I wish something had actually happened.
09:19Look, Mum, Napoleon took his hat off.
09:23Oh, that made it worth traveling 400 miles.
09:26Can we go home now?
09:33Yeah!
09:34Yeah!
09:36Yeah!
09:43Take her, Mo, son!
09:45Take her, Mo!
09:45He's a British.
09:47He's how easily amused, no?
09:49Yup.
09:50There is no nation as foolish as we are.
09:55So, uh, is he Napoleon?
09:58He's wearing a bicon hat, isn't he?
09:59With a two point.
10:00Yeah, and three points to tricon.
10:04Do you reckon if he got one point, that makes him a unicorn?
10:12They're singing him his national anthem.
10:13Well, those aren't the words of the national anthem.
10:17No, Mum.
10:18They're singing him the French national anthem.
10:20In French.
10:21Why?
10:22Because he's...
10:23Never mind.
10:24What's he doing here, anyway?
10:26He's been captured by the Royal Navy.
10:27He's been kept here until he gets moved to a prison on a tropical island in the middle of the Atlantic,
10:32where he'll be for the rest of his life.
10:33Ho, ho, tropical island.
10:37If I knew that was a punishment, I would have invaded Holland years ago.
10:40No.
10:48Well, I'm not sure sitting watching that little French fellow waving his hat all day really floats my holiday boat.
10:56Gusty, I've always got problems with wind one way or the other.
10:59Maybe you've been abroad for a holiday.
11:04Well, in the past, that was something that only very rich and powerful people could afford to do.
11:09In the 17th century, wealthy people went on trips called grand tours.
11:14I don't think you'd be getting much rest and relaxation with this lot.
11:18Every year, young lords from England set off across Europe to learn about Greek and Roman classic history.
11:27And they don't always behave themselves.
11:31Welcome to Grand Lords on Tour 1758.
11:36I'm the bear leader.
11:38It's my job to ensure these young gentellements have an educational and enriching time.
11:44Give us a kiss, bear leader.
11:45Please put that back.
11:46That is a priceless article.
11:48Oh, no!
11:50He's so old.
11:52Made a bit of a mess.
11:53Piceps, we're having a smashing time.
11:58The tour is a cultural experience for the young lords.
12:01I'm James Cecil, sixth elder of Salisbury, king's cousin and wealthiest man in Shropshire.
12:07And I'm here to explore the philosophies and sights of the ancient past.
12:12And to party!
12:16No, no, no!
12:18I'll be careful!
12:19I'm not going to lie, I'm having the time of my life.
12:21We're going to the beach!
12:22I've spent so much money, £3,000.
12:26Is that a lot?
12:27Come back in!
12:28Her point of the grand tour is like, it's a kind of finishing school for landed gentry.
12:33You know what I'm saying?
12:34We get to see all the places we studied in real life.
12:37Like Florence, Constantinople, Rome, the Balkans!
12:45Yeah, we started in the Alps, climbing.
12:47It's actually quite tough.
12:48No, no, no, not for me.
12:49I got one of the locals to carry me up in a chair.
12:53Some people get very upset with the young lord's behaviour.
12:56No, no, no, no!
12:58The folly of British boys has gained us the title golden asses all over Italy.
13:05Next week, the tour moves to Athens.
13:09Where the boys study Pythagoras and Lord Cecil is sick on the Parthenon.
13:13Yo, yo, yo, it's your boy Ibn Battuta here, international traveller.
13:25Extraordinaire!
13:26Yeah, yeah!
13:27Follow me as I go on the Hajj.
13:30That's an Islamic holy pilgrimage to Saudi Arabia.
13:33Next stop, Mecca.
13:35Boy!
13:40Yo!
13:41I'm in India!
13:42What?
13:43I did go to Mecca, but then I love travelling so much, I just kept on going.
13:46Oh, and guess what?
13:47The Sultan of India has only hired me as his ambassador.
13:51Best holiday ever!
13:55The Sultan of India is sending me to China.
13:58I can't wait!
13:58Bandits are coming!
14:00Run for your life!
14:01Bandits incoming!
14:04Bandits incoming!
14:06I'm in a ditch hiding from the bandits.
14:08Worst holiday ever!
14:10He's hiding in the ditch!
14:12Probably shouldn't have shouted out.
14:13Worst holiday ever!
14:18It's your boy Battuta here.
14:19The bandits are keeping me prisoner in a cave.
14:21As caves go, it's a nice one, but...
14:24I'm okay!
14:26I think a villager freed me!
14:29Yay!
14:29All I have to do is give him all my clothes.
14:31But, he let me keep my trousers.
14:34From now on, they are officially my lucky trousers.
14:37Yeah!
14:37Now, onward to China!
14:40Yeah, boy!
14:44So, on the way to China, I stopped off at Ceylon.
14:47Say what?
14:48Nothing but blue skies ahead for your boy Battuta.
14:52Best holiday ever!
14:56I'm sure that'll blow over.
14:57My ship got put in a storm.
15:01The others made a raft, but they said there was no room for your boy Battuta.
15:05So, you know, here I am on a sinking ship.
15:10Worst holiday ever!
15:12The ship was robbed by pirates, and my clothes were stolen again.
15:26But it's not all doom and gloom.
15:28I've still got my lucky trousers!
15:30And I have travelled 75,000 miles, so actually, best holiday ever!
15:36What?
15:38What are we going to do this summer?
15:40Oh, probably nothing again.
15:44Not if I have anything to do with it!
15:46Who are you?
15:48Hi, I'm Thomas Cook, and I'm going to give you the trip of a lifetime!
16:05Oh, she's gone.
16:07New Thomas Cook holidays!
16:09In the first holiday of its kind, I'm packaging together an incredible trip for the whole family,
16:15all the way from Leicester to Loughborough!
16:21Wait, did you say Loughborough?
16:23Ooh, Loughborough!
16:25Uh, yeah.
16:26Well, that's only 11 miles away.
16:27That's right!
16:29A whole 11 miles of luxury train travel!
16:33Oh, we're going first class!
16:35Well...
16:37Second class?
16:38One carriage of holidaymakers will be going second class.
16:42The other nine will be going third class.
16:44Your very own seat on a train!
16:47Probably.
16:48And this trip is all-inclusive, with food provided at our destination.
16:54Well, that actually sounds quite good.
16:56What are we having?
16:57A cup of tea and a ham sandwich!
17:00So much for luxury.
17:02We'll be giving out free flags to wave.
17:05And there'll be a band plane to welcome you on your arrival.
17:10It's a dream getaway!
17:13It's a third-class train ticket, a ham sandwich and a cheap flag.
17:17It doesn't really sound like a holiday.
17:19Look, there are no other package holidays.
17:21This is the first one, so it's literally just this or stay at home.
17:25Sign me up.
17:26Yeah, me too.
17:27Aw, thanks, guys.
17:28Thomas Cook holidays.
17:30Where will your next adventure take you?
17:33To be honest, it's probably going to be Loughborough again next year.
17:39When I'm on holiday, I love a treat.
17:42That might be a trip to something like a theme park, or...
17:45Eating something tasty.
17:47Hello, you nice candy floss.
17:50And in my book, the bigger the better.
17:53In Victorian times, though, they had teeny tiny servings of ice cream called Penny Licks.
17:59Hmm.
18:00Ah!
18:01I dropped my candy floss in the bin.
18:02I'll go and get it.
18:03Ah!
18:04Ah!
18:05Ah!
18:06Oh!
18:07Bonus!
18:08Toppings?
18:09Mmm!
18:11Just when you thought the British summertime couldn't get any better.
18:14Oh!
18:15Look over there!
18:16It's the ice cream cart!
18:17Yes.
18:18It's everyone's favourite Victorian summer treat.
18:21The Penny Lick.
18:22The refreshing instant snack that you can share with friends.
18:25One Penny Lick, please.
18:27Our taste sensations include lemon, strawberry, vanilla, and the saliva and germs of whoever
18:33had the glass last.
18:34Flavour?
18:35Um, er, vanilla without the saliva and germs.
18:39They ain't optional.
18:40Right.
18:41And how much is a Penny Lick?
18:43You trying to be funny?
18:44The Penny Lick costs you just one penny.
18:47Well, yes, I suppose that is cheap.
18:49And a fairly high risk of infection.
18:51You do wash these glasses, don't you?
18:52Sometimes.
18:53Achoo!
18:54I mean, if it's been properly licked clean, there's no need.
19:01Beautifully licked clean.
19:03You could eat your dinner off that.
19:04I love them.
19:05Because the cold gives me relief from the sores around my mouth.
19:08Ah!
19:09Pick a Penny Lick.
19:10They're quick.
19:11They're thick.
19:12And there's a chance they won't make you sick.
19:14One Penny Lick, please.
19:15And have one yourself.
19:16You're joking, ain't you?
19:18I'm not eating there.
19:24Madame, I present the most thrilling new experience in Paris.
19:30The first of its kind in the whole world.
19:32But it's just a wooden cart on a tiny train track.
19:35It is so much more than that.
19:37I'm sure that's fine.
19:38In years to come, people will travel the world and queue all day just to ride one of these.
19:44We call it Les Montagnes Russes.
19:47Bonjour.
19:48Oh!
19:49After those huge ice slides that look like little mountains.
19:52Preciously!
19:55Of course, we don't have much ice here in Paris.
19:58That is why we use the tracks.
19:59So we are just in a box, undling down an hill very, very fast.
20:03Oui!
20:04Isn't it awesome?
20:05Shouldn't we wear some kind of safety strap to keep us from flying out if it stops suddenly?
20:10That sounds like a great idea.
20:12But it's a bit late right now.
20:16I'm sure the tracks will keep us going in the right direction.
20:21What happens if the wheels come out?
20:23I guess we're about to find out.
20:24Oh, the acceleration.
20:26The danger.
20:27It is so much fun.
20:30Why would anyone find danger fun?
20:33I don't know, madame.
20:34But the more interest people have on this ride, the more popular it becomes.
20:39I would like to get off now.
20:41I am going to do the puppet.
20:44I'm afraid there is no way to stop the ride until we get to the bottom.
20:54That's if we do stop at the bottom, just because the track stops doesn't mean we will.
20:59Green if you want to go faster.
21:07Let's go again.
21:08I am going up.
21:10Oh.
21:12So, you go on roller coasters and eat ice creams on your holidays.
21:17I've got no idea what roller coasters and ice creams are.
21:20Or holidays.
21:21In medieval times, we didn't have anything like that.
21:24Well, not exactly, anyway.
21:25More, bit more.
21:26Bit more.
21:27Bit more.
21:28Find it safely.
21:31Hello.
21:32We're just building a medieval church.
21:34It's hard work, isn't it, Dave?
21:36Yeah.
21:37I'm shattered.
21:38Bit like my foot.
21:41But luckily, building medieval churches does mean you get a bit of time off now and again.
21:45But can you tell me why?
21:47Is it because, A, we only work in the morning so we can pray in the afternoon?
21:51B, we get some of the holy saints' feast days off, or...
21:54C, no one can tell the time, so we just finish when we want and pretend it's the end of the day.
22:00The answer is...
22:02B, we get some holy days off.
22:04In fact, that's where your word holidays comes from.
22:06Our holy days.
22:07Yeah, where are you going for your holy feast tomorrow, Ted?
22:10Church.
22:11Same as everyone else.
22:12Come on.
22:13Well, we better finish building it, then.
22:17You're all right.
22:20Hi, guys.
22:21Holiday time.
22:22I can't believe I am going to my first fest memorial.
22:28She is going to love it.
22:30The girls-only festival right here in ancient Athens celebrating the fertility goddess Demeter.
22:36Woo!
22:37You are an absolute bottom-based pooper brain for having not gone before.
22:41That's actually quite harmful.
22:42Oh, no, babe.
22:43That's the pre-party bit of Thesmophoria, where we all insult each other.
22:47You hairy smell bag.
22:50Do you have a butt like the Parthenon?
22:53Because it's big, old and smelly.
22:54Yay!
22:55Great Thesmophoria insult!
22:57Oh, look at me.
22:58Oh, hello.
22:59Olivia, you look amazing.
23:03She knows about the pig guts, right?
23:05What?
23:06Girlies love guts.
23:07We sacrifice piglets and then we mix their guts with dough.
23:12Hit the link for more easy breezy guts and dough recipes.
23:15And then we throw them all into a big pit.
23:17Yay!
23:18One woman gets chosen to be something called the baler and they have to kind of go into the pit and scooch around in all of the pig gut mush and then they scoop it all up and spread it on the altar.
23:28Congratulations.
23:29We thought it would be cool if you were the baler this year.
23:33You're so lucky, Olympia.
23:34Hashtag blast.
23:35She baled.
23:37Can you believe you got to be baler at your first Thesmophoria?
23:41I honestly can't.
23:42Thesmophoria gift time!
23:45Click below to buy our very own Taylor Potter Piggy Collection.
23:48Perfect for you and your friends.
23:50You know, sometimes you just give each other the gifts instead of bothering with all the baler and somebody scooping around and all the pig gut mush stuff.
23:57Wait, what?
23:58What?
23:59So the gunk smooshing, that was all optional?
24:01You butt-brained, bone-headed, baboo-butted boars!
24:05Awkward.
24:06Actually, the insults are at the start of the festival.
24:09Yeah, that was actually quite powerful.
24:11Don't forget to like and subscribe.
24:15Pig guts?
24:16Now, that sounds like my kind of festival.
24:19Is it all you can eat?
24:23That's made me hungry now.
24:25Still, nothing beats my favourite kind of holiday.
24:28I do like to be beside the seaside.
24:31And we've got Queen Victoria to thank for helping make seaside holidays popular.
24:36But it was people like holiday camp pioneer Philly Buckley who really changed things.
24:42Thanks to him, seaside breaks became more affordable for everyone from queens to rats.
24:48Happy holidays!
24:49Happy holidays!
24:50Happy holidays!
24:51Happy holidays!
24:56Oh no!
24:57The beach was not traditionally where one would go.
25:01And here in Bognayad this water's so cold.
25:05But doctors said it helps to make your gout go.
25:09Gout go.
25:10It's cool to be by the sea, now it's cool to be by the sea.
25:15I like to be by the sea and to take all my family.
25:19I change in a bathing machine, I see the sea but it can't see me.
25:23Even a royal empress needs a staycation by the sea.
25:27I'm promenading, while the kids are bark, kitten spading, oh yeah.
25:34In the sea we're paddling and wading.
25:38Na na na na, break by the ocean, break by the ocean.
25:44Donkey rides baby, or building a sand castle maybe, oh yeah.
25:50Watch a Punch and Judy show daily.
25:54Na na na na, break by the ocean, break by the ocean.
26:04Seaside, factory workers sure like to be B-side.
26:10I thought for their week off I could provide
26:14A holiday with entertainment supplied, supplied.
26:19Holiday camp by the sea, my holiday camp by the sea.
26:24I called it Butlins cause I named it after me.
26:28I'll do everything I can to make my campers all happy.
26:32Catering for all their needs, obviously for a fee.
26:36Candy floss baby, or a knobbly knee contest maybe, oh yeah.
26:44Grandparents, mums, dads and their babies.
26:48Everyone has fun by the ocean, break by the ocean.
26:53It's cool to be by the sea, now it's cool to be by the sea.
26:56Little Hap-O-Wee, yeah yeah, when we came along it became a cool place to be.
27:00It's cool to be by the sea, and it's all thanks to him and me.
27:04Na na na na, break by the ocean, break by the ocean.
27:09Shall we all go and get fish and shit?
27:12Yeah!
27:17Candy floss baby!
27:21Shall we all go and get fish and shit?
27:28The past is no longer a mystery.
27:31Hope you enjoyed Horrible Histories.
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