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The Last Leg Season 33 Episode 11
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FunTranscript
00:00Thank you for letting us be ourselves
00:02So don't mind me if I repeat myself
00:04These simple lines be good for your health
00:06And keep them crime rhymes on the shelf
00:08Live my life like I just don't care
00:10Five thousand leaders never scared
00:12Rain and noise is the moment they fear
00:16Get up, you still appear from my death
00:18Get up, throw your hands in the hole
00:20Get up, and shit
00:22Get up, get up, get up, get up
00:26Get up, get up, get up, get up
00:28Finish wrapping the presents, sit back on the couch
00:36Then realise you forgot to buy batteries
00:38It's Christmas Eve and it's time for the last leg
00:42Tonight on the show
00:44We look at a prediction of Christmas future
00:46Look back on Christmas past
00:48And take a sneaky look at our Christmas presents
00:52Plus we'll be joined by presenter Alison Hammond
00:54Comedian Harry Hill and music legend Rick Astley
00:56On the show that's always a Christmas die hard
01:08G'day, I'm Adam Hills
01:10Welcome to The Last Leg
01:12The show that wonders if King Charles' speech
01:14Is going to get one less viewer this year
01:16With fears always of the pride of Huddersfield
01:18Alex Brooker and the man who turned on the Christmas lights
01:20In Exeter this year but only in his own house
01:22Josh Whittacombe
01:30Happy Christmas Eve everybody
01:32Every year we dress up there's something ridiculous for Christmas
01:34I of course am Tom Hanks from the Polar Express
01:38There you go
01:40Thank you
01:42It's not bad
01:44You're such a fan of the film that you've called the character Tom Hanks
01:46Oh
01:48You look like you're about to strip
01:52That is a different type of Polar Express
01:56I went with Polar Express because it's my favourite Tom Hanks film
02:00Yeah
02:02Actually it's my second favourite but Philadelphia didn't feel appropriate
02:04Josh
02:06Merry Christmas
02:08Josh would you like to explain who you're dressed as?
02:10Oh I didn't get the memo I didn't know it was fancy dress
02:12No I've come as
02:14I'll stand up for this
02:16I've come as Francis Rossi from the Band Aid video
02:20Amazing
02:22I'm not saying I've run out of ideas
02:26I look like Michael Portillo
02:28I am
02:30I think
02:32You look like someone who's been caught at Heathrow trying to smuggle in illegal reptiles
02:34I look like Michael Portillo
02:36I am
02:38You look like someone who's been caught at Heathrow trying to smuggle in illegal reptiles
02:40Well I've certainly got a snake in these tight trousers
02:44Hey
02:46Alex do you want to explain what's going on there?
02:48Yeah I'm Tim Allen in the Santa Claus
02:50Santa's just fallen off my roof and I've just put the jacket on
02:52So
02:54Yeah and also I'll tell you what
02:56It's comfy in it
02:58I'll tell you what your snake will be alright in these pyjama bottoms mate
03:00Honestly
03:02This is the comfiest I've ever been
03:04I'm not going to say you've not gone to much effort
03:06But compared to the two of us
03:08Wearing literally slippers
03:10Pajamas
03:12And just you put on a Santa
03:14Yeah I know
03:16I think these are comfy slippers
03:18I can only feel the one
03:20Alright the big story of course
03:22Is Christmas
03:24It's the story Alex has been most excited about all year
03:28So let's start with this
03:30Is it okay that Alex interrupted a last leg meeting this year
03:32To have his Christmas tree delivered?
03:36Okay is it okay he did that in October?
03:42Well here's another is it okay for you
03:44Is it okay that it's a 13 foot tree?
03:46That is
03:48I know that's 12 more feet than Alex has
03:50Let's see here's a photo of it arriving
03:56Just so you know Alex took the tree out
03:58And then once that was done Alex's wife put all her belongings in there and there
04:02Here's the photo of the tree once it was up and running
04:06It's so
04:08It looks like you know those North Korean marches where they have the missiles
04:14Honestly it's so big that's an actual star
04:18Is it a real tree?
04:20It's not a real tree?
04:22Oh no no no no no
04:24So even your Christmas tree is prosthetic
04:26And look knowing how much you love Christmas I would imagine
04:32The ads you get on your phone are different to the ads I get on my phone
04:36Oh mate I mean the algorithm on Instagram
04:38I start getting like loads of these like Christmas
04:40Like Larry Christmas suits
04:42Oh mate I mean the algorithm on Instagram
04:44I start getting like loads of these like Christmas
04:46Like Larry Christmas suits
04:48And outfits because I thought maybe
04:50Because I was talking about Christmas jumpers
04:52That's all my algorithm is just Christmas suits
04:54Yeah we've got some of the garish images
04:56Alex has been getting check these out
04:58The thing with it is you two complain a lot
05:00You know about
05:02Your disabilities but that guy in the suit
05:04He hasn't got a head
05:08It looks like
05:10I'd say that's far
05:12And the Paralympics you're in the toughest category
05:14Yeah especially if it's a dead heat in the sprinting
05:22The suit I love the suit
05:24It looks like the kind of suit Santa would wear to court
05:26You know what I mean
05:28Like if Santa turned up in the Epstein files
05:30Oh no Santa's not
05:32Obviously Santa's not in the Epstein files
05:34Obviously because we all know
05:36Santa makes the list and checks it twice
05:38I reckon
05:40Pausing for an edit
05:50I think nothing says Christmas Eve more than Philadelphia and the Epstein files
05:56I reckon if you can encapsulate Alex's algorithm into one image
06:02It would be this
06:04Declan Rice dressed as Santa drinking a Frosé with Big John
06:06That is
06:08That's Alex's
06:10I'm assuming that's your default setting when you blank out during an Easter
06:12Is it true you want a dash cam for Christmas?
06:16Yeah I do
06:17Yeah I genuinely do
06:18I've got banged
06:19So I've got banged into dash cam footage
06:21That's the other thing my algorithm is jumping up
06:23What do you mean?
06:24So like I've got really into like watching these videos
06:27Of like just people having near misses
06:29But the one I've been getting into most
06:31Is a geezer called Big Jobber
06:33Who basically
06:34His name's Big Jobber
06:35And basically what he does is
06:36I'm going to say it Hillsley
06:37When Brooker searched Big Jobber
06:38He wasn't looking for a dash cam footage
06:44He assesses like the insurance library
06:47Who's at fault for the crash
06:48Yeah based on the dash cam footage
06:50Are you okay?
06:51I think I'm having like the most boring midlife crisis of all time
06:57I really want a dash cam
06:59We've got a very special treat for Alex tonight
07:01So we've been following Santa on his radar tonight
07:03Oh okay
07:04So we're going to check in to see where he is right now
07:06Have a look at this on the map
07:08He...
07:09Now that seems to be Huddersfield
07:11Which is where you live Alex
07:12Yeah
07:13He seems to be stuck there
07:14Um
07:15Let's go to Santa's dash cam
07:16Or as he calls it
07:17Dasher cam
07:18Uh
07:19To see what's happening
07:24Gosh!
07:25What arsehole put up a 12 foot 3?
07:27I hope they don't breathalise me
07:29I've had 83 million sherrys
07:32Here's your foes machine you prick
07:34Now one AI generator reimagined Santa over the decades showing how, and this is a quote, beloved figures can evolve alongside society's progress
07:49Here is its revealing timeline of Santas
07:52Let's go through them one by one
07:54Here's 1960s Santa
07:55Textbook
07:56Classic
07:57Classic Santa
07:58Coca-Cola Santa
07:59No issue with that
08:00Yep
08:011970s Santa
08:02Oh
08:03I've...
08:04I'm not letting my kids sit on his knee
08:07Let's look at 1980s Santa
08:10Wow
08:11He's been lifting his sack at eight
08:14It's no wonder mummy was kissing Santa Claus looking at that guy
08:18I mean, that'll leave her Saint Nicholas
08:20LAUGHTER
08:21LAUGHTER
08:22LAUGHTER
08:23LAUGHTER
08:24LAUGHTER
08:25LAUGHTER
08:26This...
08:27This is how we just go, oh dear
08:29LAUGHTER
08:30LAUGHTER
08:31LAUGHTER
08:32LAUGHTER
08:33I... I... I...
08:34I enjoyed it
08:35Oh dear
08:36That from me, do you know what, I'm not...
08:39It's gonna... It's ruined Christmas
08:40LAUGHTER
08:41And that's a guy who was fine with the Epstein joke
08:44LAUGHTER
08:46Er... 2010s Santa?
08:48Couldn't give a shit, could I?
08:49LAUGHTER
08:50No...
08:51LAUGHTER
08:522030s?
08:53Well, I tell you what, J.K. Rowling's not gonna be happy
08:55From 2030s
08:56LAUGHTER
08:58LAUGHTER
08:59LAUGHTER
09:00Oh dear
09:01LAUGHTER
09:02LAUGHTER
09:03Are you heard?
09:04No, there's one in the audience!
09:05LAUGHTER
09:06How did that happen?
09:08APPLAUSE
09:10Mate!
09:11It's the one fucking night you were!
09:16LAUGHTER
09:17I'm not so sure about 2050s Santa
09:21I mean, no... I mean, he looks like he's gonna shoot the naughty boys
09:24LAUGHTER
09:25And look, as Santa faces an AI future, so does the art of gift-giving
09:29Because surveys have found that a lot of people are using generative AI for present ideas
09:33I love the idea that tomorrow there's gonna be men everywhere
09:37Blaming AI for misjudged gives for their other halves
09:40LAUGHTER
09:41It's just going...
09:42I mean...
09:43Jack GPT just said anal beads, I don't even know why...
09:46LAUGHTER
09:47Like, the technology's just not... it's just not right
09:50By the way, love, do us a favour, can you quickly ring your mum and tell her not to open hers?
09:54LAUGHTER
09:56So, we've decided to use AI tonight to choose our presents for each other
10:02And to deliver them, would you please welcome all the way from the future
10:05Robot Santa!
10:07Ah!
10:08Santa, baby
10:09Yes, little saviour under the tree
10:12For me
10:14Being an awful good day
10:18Santa, baby
10:20So, how about the future
10:22I mean, the technology in the future's amazing, isn't it?
10:25I tell you what, the robot's improved more than the trolley, hasn't it?
10:29LAUGHTER
10:30LAUGHTER
10:33It's not often I get to say this about other people, but you do walk a bit funny, don't you?
10:37LAUGHTER
10:42Can the robot do the Vs towards Alex?
10:45LAUGHTER
10:48Alright, so we started by asking AI the question, what is a good Christmas present for Alex Brooker?
10:53Now, once we explain who Alex Brooker was...
10:55LAUGHTER
10:59It suggested a personalised Arsenal jersey
11:02Yes, please
11:03So, could you please bring the presents over?
11:05LAUGHTER
11:07LAUGHTER
11:08Do you know what?
11:09Yeah
11:10RADA is fucking good, isn't it?
11:12LAUGHTER
11:18LAUGHTER
11:20Four years of debt for this!
11:22LAUGHTER
11:24Thank you very much
11:26I think that's your answer
11:27It's good to have Daniel Day-Lewis back in the game, isn't it?
11:30LAUGHTER
11:31Oh, wow!
11:32Unbelievable!
11:33No, back a bit...
11:34There we go
11:35Oh, there we go
11:36Thank you
11:37Thank you, Robot Santa
11:41They said...
11:42Do you know what?
11:43Greg Wallace would never be back on TV
11:45LAUGHTER
11:46LAUGHTER
11:47LAUGHTER
11:48LAUGHTER
11:49LAUGHTER
11:53LAUGHTER
11:57So I started out by asking AI what to get for Alex
11:59Yes
12:00And it said a personalised Arsenal jersey
12:02Am I allowed to open it?
12:03You are allowed to open it
12:04Oh, wow!
12:05So we've got you an Arsenal jersey
12:07And on the back we've got the picture of you
12:09Er...
12:10With Declan Rice
12:11And Big John drinking the Frosé
12:13Oh, yes please!
12:14Merry Christmas!
12:15APPLAUSE
12:18I love this robot
12:19He did a little...
12:20He did a little happy dance when it was good
12:22So when...
12:23When I asked...
12:24LAUGHTER
12:25LAUGHTER
12:26How is the robot funnier than all of us?
12:28LAUGHTER
12:29This is the future, Josh
12:30LAUGHTER
12:31So when I asked AI what to get Josh
12:35It said...
12:36Er...
12:37Something that balances his sober lifestyle
12:39His love of home
12:40His writing work
12:41And his comedic vibe
12:42Oh, that's genuinely nice
12:44It said...
12:45A premium tea gift set
12:46And notebook
12:48Combo with a personal note
12:50So it's...
12:51An AI wrote the note
12:53This is the personal note
12:54Oh!
12:55For when you fancy putting the kettle on
12:56I genuinely like this
12:57For when you fancy putting the kettle on
12:59And jamming down those five minute observations
13:02LAUGHTER
13:03This is the great thing
13:04It also added
13:05Er...
13:06Josh is an observational comedian
13:08Right
13:09Who focuses on the minutiae of everyday life
13:11Rather than big topical issues
13:13LAUGHTER
13:14I think anyone who's seen me
13:17Trying to walk around the news on this show
13:19Would agree with that
13:20LAUGHTER
13:21And so what did...
13:22What did AI suggest for me?
13:23Ah...
13:24Well AI
13:25They got...
13:26So basically they said
13:27Something that was tied to your interest in disability awareness and sport
13:30But more importantly
13:31A high quality item
13:33That acknowledges that part of his life
13:34But not in a pitying way
13:36They wanted us to give you something empowering
13:38Not in a pitying way
13:40No, so we didn't want to get you any sort of...
13:42Any sort of present that would kind of sound pitying at all
13:45OK
13:46So we've got you a book
13:48You have got me a book
13:49Which is called
13:50The Little Disabled Engine That Could
13:52LAUGHTER
13:53Thank you so much boys
13:58I can add that to my collection
13:59Along with C-Spot Limp
14:01LAUGHTER
14:02And Owe the places you'll park
14:05LAUGHTER
14:06And can we also have a big thank you to Robot Santa
14:10CHEERING
14:11Now Christmas telly is also changing
14:18There's a reality series on Hallmark this year called Finding Mr Christmas
14:21The TV show focuses on ten aspiring actors
14:24Who compete for the chance to be the next leading man
14:27In a Hallmark Christmas film
14:29Here is the cheesy trailer for the wholesome reality series
14:33Boy do I have an early holiday gift for you
14:36We are back for season two with an all new group of hunks
14:39And festive face-offs
14:41Check out this sneak peek
14:42It's a huge house
14:43I'm down to stay here for a while
14:45What's up guys
14:46What's up fellas
14:47What's up Angel
14:48Dude it's so epic
14:50Dude we got the trust circle going on already
14:55I don't trust that trust circle
14:59Have you seen Finding Mr Easter?
15:01It's a bit bleaker because the winner gets nailed to a cross
15:03LAUGHTER
15:05Now, throughout the show
15:16Sorry it's status photo-edgy for you
15:19Please
15:20Honestly
15:21You're just everything you say with that ponytail
15:23LAUGHTER
15:24Now throughout the show
15:26This Finding Mr Christmas
15:28Did you just get a cut away of my fucking ponytail?
15:30LAUGHTER
15:31We've never used that camera angle in 15 years
15:36That's not one of our angles
15:39Where's that?
15:40I don't even know where that camera is
15:43Throughout Finding Mr Christmas
15:45The actors had to complete a series of challenges
15:47Including gift wrapping
15:48Untangling Christmas lights
15:49And acting in a scene
15:50But
15:51We think they missed a trick
15:53Because we've got our own Mr Christmas here
15:55Alex Brooker
15:56I don't know why they didn't cast him right?
15:58100% mate
15:59Yep
16:00So, throughout the show tonight
16:01We're going to set Alex a series of Christmassy tasks
16:03And he's going to do the first one now
16:05We need you to head over there please, Alex
16:07I didn't know why
16:08Are you ready? Are you ready?
16:09APPLAUSE
16:14It's based on this festive challenge
16:18Remember guys, presentation is important
16:20But your personality and star quality
16:23Are always on Santa's radar
16:26So give us your best runway walks
16:28And slay
16:32Link, you're up first
16:39OK, hello
16:41Melissa, I don't want you to get too close to this fire
16:43Sugar melts
16:47Wow
16:48So, it's time for Alex to take on the Mr Christmas catwalk challenge
16:57Alex, I want some strut with a good will to all men vibe
17:01McMahon
17:02And the looking back
17:03How much would you get your best
17:04Like I've never heard of the other star
17:06?
17:07Oh, you are going to get to the future
17:09Go into your eye
17:11Who are you?
17:12Get out of here
17:13Who are you, Marlowe
17:14Who are you, Marlowe
17:15Who are you, Marlowe
17:16Who are you, Marlowe
17:17Who are you, Marlowe
17:18Who are you, Marlowe
17:19Hey, Marlowe
17:20Who are you, Marlowe
17:21Don't get too close to me, because I think this is flammable as fuck.
17:26Alex, you're through to the next round.
17:28Yeah!
17:34All right, let's welcome tonight's guests.
17:36They're Bake Off royalty, which means much like real royalty,
17:39they're both in bread.
17:40Please welcome Alison Hammond and comedian Harry Hill.
17:51I don't believe you, Francis Rossi and Tim Allen.
18:07And Bernard Cribbins from the Railway Church.
18:10I thought it.
18:12Now, Alison has already received the best gift of all a few weeks ago
18:17when Prince Harry lip-synced to one of your exchanges from Bake Off.
18:22I thought I was dreaming when I saw that.
18:23So here's the perfectly timed clip with Stephen Colbert.
18:27If you was treated like a king for the day,
18:29what would you want me to do for you?
18:31Um, back for me, probably.
18:33You'd want me to do what?
18:35Beg.
18:36Beg.
18:36Beg.
18:38Beg.
18:38Beg.
18:39B-E-K-E.
18:40Beg.
18:41Beg.
18:42Oh, bake!
18:47What a weird moment.
18:51Crazy.
18:52I mean, someone's like, oh, my God.
18:54Me and Prince Harry are connected now.
18:57You totally like that.
18:58You know what I mean? We're tied.
18:59Yeah.
18:59I mean, how can I be humble now?
19:01Do you know what I mean?
19:03Does it make me kind of like royalty now?
19:05Like, am I princess?
19:07Am I?
19:07Yeah, but it does appear that Prince Harry
19:10has got a lot of time on his hands now.
19:13LAUGHTER
19:14What do you reckon?
19:18LAUGHTER
19:19Harry, what are your Christmas traditions?
19:25Um, well, we always...
19:27What we do with the TV,
19:29when we have the Christmas lunch...
19:31Yeah.
19:32..and then we have...
19:33We've got one of those TVs that you can bring round...
19:35You know, it comes...
19:36You can angle it round.
19:37It's on the wall, but you can angle it round.
19:39Yeah.
19:39And so we bring it round so that it's across the other side
19:42of the table, and then we have the King's Speech on there.
19:45So it's like he's joining us.
19:47LAUGHTER
19:48LAUGHTER
19:49What's that?
19:52Yeah.
19:52Yes, it has been a tough year for a lot of people.
19:55LAUGHTER
19:56And look, we talked about Alex's 13-foot tree in his garden.
20:01Anything special in your garden this Christmas?
20:03Uh, well, we've got robins, actually, nesting.
20:06Ooh!
20:06Yeah, I know.
20:08We put up a nesting box last year and...
20:12Yeah.
20:12And we've got some...
20:13Actually, some baby robins in there now.
20:15Yeah, and I've actually got a camera.
20:17You know, one of those little tiny cameras?
20:19Oh, yeah, yeah.
20:19Yeah.
20:20It's got a bird watch.
20:21Yeah, with, like, a live feed.
20:22Yeah.
20:23Could we see that?
20:25Or...
20:25We have got it.
20:26Yes, yes, we can.
20:27Yes, we can.
20:27Let's see the live feed of your...
20:28There's a little robin in there this morning.
20:29Oh, that's so lovely.
20:30But, um...
20:32LAUGHTER
20:32LAUGHTER
20:33LAUGHTER
20:34LAUGHTER
20:36LAUGHTER
20:37That's what?
20:39LAUGHTER
20:39LAUGHTER
20:40LAUGHTER
20:41LAUGHTER
20:42LAUGHTER
20:43LAUGHTER
20:44That's really upsetting.
20:45LAUGHTER
20:46Talk about a live feed.
20:48LAUGHTER
20:49LAUGHTER
20:50LAUGHTER
20:51All right, we'll have more last week for you after the break
20:53as we chat to Rick Astley and find out which one of our guests
20:56had a crush on him as a teenager.
20:58See you in a little bit.
20:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
21:01CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
21:02CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
21:04APPLAUSE
21:05Welcome back to Last Leg.
21:19We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill.
21:22Uh, Alex is starting to change like Tim Allen in, uh...
21:27LAUGHTER
21:28I'm not.
21:29Are you not?
21:30Are you not?
21:31No, I'm not, mate.
21:32I don't think that's how you looked in the last part.
21:33That's the same, mate.
21:34OK.
21:35All right, Josh, do you want to explain what's going on with you?
21:38I'm going through the Band-Aid video.
21:40LAUGHTER
21:41I, er...
21:42I, er...
21:43I didn't...
21:44I didn't know Hanson were in Band-Aid.
21:45LAUGHTER
21:46Handsome?
21:47LAUGHTER
21:48I can't hear much, by the way.
21:50LAUGHTER
21:51I'm Sting from Band-Aid.
21:52Look at that.
21:53LAUGHTER
21:54Amazing.
21:55Bang on.
21:56I can't hear anything.
21:57LAUGHTER
21:58I'm getting Gail Tilsley off-coller.
22:01LAUGHTER
22:02Anyone else getting that?
22:04APPLAUSE
22:05I'm getting...
22:07I'm getting Gail Tilsley and Paul Hollywood.
22:09LAUGHTER
22:11And, obviously, I'm now Tom Hanks as Woody from Toy Story.
22:15Oh, yes.
22:16Oh, yeah.
22:17Because the final scene of Toy Story
22:18is when they all become friends at Christmas.
22:20Yes.
22:21Time now to welcome another guest
22:22to the last late Christmas celebration.
22:24He's a soul singer whose songs may be
22:26the one thing your family doesn't fight over this Christmas.
22:28Please welcome...
22:29Rick Astley!
22:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
22:32Welcome to the party, Rick.
22:55What are your Christmas traditions?
22:57Eating and drinking, I think, pretty much.
22:59Yes!
23:00My wife is Danish and we have quite a lot of Scandinavian
23:03tradition in our Christmas.
23:04Bacon?
23:05Yeah, a lot of bacon, actually.
23:07LAUGHTER
23:08Yeah, yeah.
23:09But also, they celebrate on the eve, on the 24th.
23:13Yes.
23:14So we've got into that habit over the years of doing that.
23:16Well, I'm very sorry that you're here tonight on Christmas Eve.
23:18I know.
23:19Exactly.
23:20I'm...
23:21Exactly.
23:22I'm straight back there after this.
23:24If there's anything left, I'll be, you know, lovely.
23:27LAUGHTER
23:28No, so, to be honest, tomorrow is a bit like our boxing day,
23:31to be honest.
23:32Right.
23:33It's a bit more chill and, you know, so...
23:34Yep.
23:35Yeah.
23:36Now, we asked AI to suggest a present for you.
23:37I can't wait.
23:38OK.
23:39LAUGHTER
23:40It said maybe a rare vinyl copy of something like The Smiths.
23:44Yeah.
23:45Because you did a show of Smith songs at Glastonbury.
23:47Indeed I did.
23:48I saw it.
23:49Which, yeah, you saw it and one of our team was there
23:50and captured the joy Josh felt as he watched you perform.
23:53This is genuine footage.
23:55Backing on the streets of Birmingham
23:59I wander to myself
24:03Will I barely be safe again?
24:07With each side street and his sit down
24:10I wander to myself
24:14Oh.
24:15What a nice...
24:16One of the best hours of my life.
24:20And watching that video, this is going to blow your mind.
24:23That was after I stopped drinking.
24:25LAUGHTER
24:27Harry, you share Rick's love of Morrissey's music.
24:31Uh...
24:32His music? Yeah, not so much his...
24:34LAUGHTER
24:35LAUGHTER
24:37LAUGHTER
24:38But you...
24:39Don't talk about that, do we?
24:40You performed as Morrissey?
24:42I was... I did Morrissey and Stars in there.
24:44I... I remember it.
24:45We have a dazzling clip of the enthusiastic performance
24:48from the turn of the millennium.
24:50Mmmmm.
24:53N voit XE!
24:55BLEASE YIIYY!!
24:56espaOSSE YIYY!!!
25:01happyness
25:02F WWE
25:03F wonks should break to Paolo
25:06onlar
25:07Full итоге
25:08Ah
25:10Who
25:12Won't you make a man of me, yeah
25:16When
25:17In
25:18It's a charming car, it's a charming car, it's a charming car.
25:23He's got a lot of fun.
25:25APPLAUSE
25:27So good.
25:28Have you ever met Morrissey?
25:30I haven't met Morrissey, but part of it was you had to get permission.
25:33So I had to get permission from Morrissey to impersonate him.
25:36There was a...
25:37Or to do that song.
25:39And I got a fax through in the old days of faxes,
25:42and it was signed by Morrissey saying,
25:45so I thought, oh, so Morrissey's on the other end of this number,
25:49because the number is there.
25:51I thought, well, I'll...
25:52And I had this idea, so I sent him a fax back saying,
25:55how about you and me do a novelty single for Christmas,
25:59our version of Little Donkey.
26:01Wow.
26:02But I never...
26:03Never heard back.
26:04I mean, you've got your own quiff.
26:08I have.
26:09I have to wear an artificial one, but if you liked, I could...
26:12Would you like me to reprise the...
26:14Yes.
26:15Oh, yes.
26:16Have you got them?
26:17Yes.
26:18I don't know.
26:19I'm not feeling it.
26:20Come on!
26:21CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
26:25What a showman!
26:26He knows how to get the crowd going.
26:30Here we go.
26:31Here we go.
26:35Lovely.
26:36It's uncanny.
26:39Little donkey.
26:41Little donkey.
26:43On a dusty road.
26:46Going to keep on...
26:48Flooding onwards.
26:50With your hair...
26:51LAUGHTER
26:52APPLAUSE
26:58Brilliant.
27:00Oh, mercy, everyone.
27:02Oh, mercy.
27:04Merry Christmas.
27:05Merry Christmas.
27:06So good.
27:07Alison, is it true you had a teenage crush on Rick?
27:11Well, it's not the sort of place I would, like, probably admit it,
27:14with Rick literally sitting there, but he already knows.
27:17We've met quite a few times and now I'm quite cool with it.
27:20Are you?
27:21Like, I'm all right.
27:22I'm totally cool with, like, being in the...
27:23As long as Harry's sat between us.
27:24Oh, yeah, exactly.
27:26So, Alison, just to clarify your story, you used to fancy Rick Astley.
27:31Then you met him and now it's gone away.
27:35Not at all, Josh.
27:36Obviously, I've still got feelings, but there is, like, you know...
27:39Have you?
27:41Do you want to expand on that?
27:43Listen.
27:44I'm not saying there's a...
27:45There's a wife.
27:46There's a wife.
27:48I feel like I'm the...
27:50Come on, Harry.
27:51Come on, Harry.
27:52Come on, Harry.
27:53Get there.
27:54Oh, no!
27:55I don't know when I'm not wanted.
27:57LAUGHTER
27:58Obviously, I was a lot younger than I am now and, obviously, I still get the same feelings.
28:12I'm going to say it.
28:13There's a chance you're going to be Rick Rolled.
28:18Come back, Harry.
28:19Come back, Harry.
28:21Harry.
28:22Alison, on the very night that his wife is celebrating Christmas.
28:26LAUGHTER
28:28Well, she's not here, is she?
28:29Yes, sir.
28:31LAUGHTER
28:35Just out of interest, Rick, where can Alison see you perform next year?
28:38Yeah!
28:40Um, here, there and everywhere.
28:41We're on tour in April, which...
28:43Are we?
28:44Yes, we're all on tour.
28:45LAUGHTER
28:47Short notice.
28:49Yeah.
28:50So, um...
28:51We can't wait.
28:52We can't wait.
28:53We're looking forward to it.
28:54Now, Harry, you and Alison both host different versions of Bake Off, but you have brought your own showstopper to the show tonight.
29:00LAUGHTER
29:01Yeah, I've got to go back there again.
29:02Go on.
29:04LAUGHTER
29:05Well, I just think, you know, people forget what Christmas is really about.
29:09Yeah.
29:10And what they concentrate on is the food.
29:12You know, it's all about the food.
29:14So, what I've done is I've done a, um, my own...
29:18..a savoury...
29:19..nativity.
29:21Um...
29:22Frazzles!
29:23I love it!
29:24Which I've...
29:25Which I've made.
29:26Which I've made myself.
29:27And what...
29:28Just trying to get the message of Christmas through...
29:31LAUGHTER
29:33Through food.
29:35Smells lovely.
29:36And...
29:37Do you want me to...
29:38Do you want me to talk you through it?
29:39Yeah.
29:40So, these are Frazzles on the roof of the, uh...
29:43LAUGHTER
29:44That's the...
29:45It's a Pomb Bear.
29:46LAUGHTER
29:47As...
29:48As the Angel Gabriel.
29:49LAUGHTER
29:50And then we have the Three Kings here.
29:52Which I...
29:53I made from...
29:54Pepparamis, cos they're...
29:55LAUGHTER
29:56They're spicy, a bit more exotic.
29:58Um...
29:59You've got the two sausages here.
30:01Uh...
30:02Joseph and Mary.
30:03Obviously, Joseph is a bit taller than Mary.
30:05Yeah.
30:06Um...
30:07And then you've got the...
30:08The star of the show, the Baby Jesus.
30:10Uh...
30:11Which is a...
30:12Pig in Blanket.
30:13And there's the...
30:14LAUGHTER
30:15I don't mean that in a...
30:16In a sort of negative...
30:17You know, in a...
30:18LAUGHTER
30:20I don't want any trouble.
30:21LAUGHTER
30:22And then...
30:23You've got the manger made out of chip sticks.
30:24They're nice.
30:25Mm-hm.
30:26And then you've got the...
30:27You've got the halo there.
30:28LAUGHTER
30:29So that's just something that, perhaps,
30:30people could, you know,
30:31make their own tradition now.
30:33LAUGHTER
30:34The savoury nativity.
30:35Would you like to...?
30:36Have you got it in kit form?
30:37Right.
30:38Do you, like, sell it in a kit?
30:39Could you...?
30:40It's about 12 quid.
30:41LAUGHTER
30:42I mean, the slight problem with it is,
30:44to secure the sausages,
30:46you do have to use, um...
30:48Screws.
30:49LAUGHTER
30:52We're going to have more last leg for you after the break,
30:54as Alex performs a Hallmark Christmas scene
30:56we've written just for tonight,
30:57but right now,
30:58Rick Astley is going to perform
31:00his first Christmas hit of the night.
31:02Before he does, though,
31:03we've talked a lot about Alex's love of Christmas,
31:05but Lib Dem leader Ed Davey
31:07revealed in an interview this year
31:09that he listens to Christmas tunes all year round.
31:11Wow.
31:12How do we feel about that?
31:13Is that all right?
31:14Oh, but...
31:15But isn't his birthday on Christmas Day?
31:16That's the reason, isn't it?
31:17Uh...
31:18I think his birthday's on Christmas Day,
31:19so that's probably one of the reasons
31:21why it means a lot to him.
31:22Yeah, cos otherwise it'd just be fucking weird.
31:24LAUGHTER
31:25Well, he's going to make the next bit awkward.
31:39Rick is going to play us into the break,
31:41but who better to introduce him
31:43than the leader of the Lib Dems...
31:45LAUGHTER
31:47Sir Ed Davey!
31:49LAUGHTER
31:50Hi, guys, it's Ed Davey here.
31:52Merry Christmas to you all.
31:54It's true, I like listening to Christmas music
31:57all year round.
31:58The reason is,
32:00my daughter and I love winding up her mum,
32:03and it's on my iPhone
32:04and we play it in the car all the time.
32:06Um, I'm never going to give up Christmas,
32:09so here's Rick Astley.
32:12APPLAUSE
32:21Sleigh bells ring
32:23Are you listening?
32:25In a lane
32:26Snow is glistening
32:29A beautiful sight
32:31We're happy tonight
32:33Walking in a winter wonderland
32:36Come on, bro, let's go!
32:38Come on, bro, let's go!
32:39We're talking, let's go!
32:40We're talking, let's go!
32:41We're talking, let's go!
32:42We're talking
32:56Let's go!
32:58?
33:04?
33:06Welcome back to Last Leg.
33:32We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill.
33:35Alex, you're definitely changing.
33:36I feel a little bit more Christmassy at the moment.
33:39Do you?
33:40I'm feeling it a little bit different at the moment, but...
33:43You're definitely progressing.
33:44No, I haven't.
33:46OK, Josh, would you like to explain who you are now?
33:50No, I'm from the Band-Aid video.
33:52Yeah.
33:53So I'm Sarah Dallin from Bananarama, of course.
33:55Yeah.
33:56APPLAUSE
33:59Look at these Gs, they're fucking brilliant.
34:02APPLAUSE
34:05It ain't what I do, it's the way that I do it.
34:07We've always said it.
34:08LAUGHTER
34:09And obviously, I'm Tom Hanks in the movie Forrest Gump, because he famously said life
34:13is like a box of chocolates and the main time you get chocolates is at Christmas.
34:18LAUGHTER
34:20You still look a bit like you're going to strip.
34:22LAUGHTER
34:23You know, Forrest Hump.
34:25LAUGHTER
34:26And now, throughout the show, we've been putting Alex through his paces to see how he'd fare
34:30on the US reality series Finding Mr Christmas.
34:32The winner of the first series, by the way, earned a leading role in a holiday movie about
34:37the owner of a Seattle dog shelter who falls for a meticulous web page editor.
34:42The movie was called Happy Howlidays.
34:45I love it.
34:46See what you did there.
34:47I see what they did there.
34:48I love it.
34:49All right, I'm going to send everyone, if you could all go over and get ready for the
34:52next challenge for Alex, please, over in that corner of the studio.
34:55So Alex's final challenge tonight is to test out his acting chops in a scene we've written
35:01as the ultimate Hallmark Christmas movie.
35:04Lights, camera, Christmas.
35:07APPLAUSE
35:14Help!
35:15Help!
35:16I need an emergency appointment.
35:17Oh, my God.
35:18It's Alison Hammond, the big city TV presenter.
35:21That's right.
35:22I've become so career-focused, I've lost touch with what's important in life.
35:26I'm single and I'm home for the holidays.
35:30And?
35:31And I've hit a dog.
35:36Oh, my God.
35:37What happened?
35:38LAUGHTER
35:39APPLAUSE
35:40I'll tell you what happened.
35:54It's quite difficult to talk because it's really tight on the jaw.
35:57At least do a dog voice.
35:59LAUGHTER
36:00I'll tell you what happened.
36:01That's better.
36:02Yeah, is that better?
36:03That's better.
36:04I was just sitting there by the side of the road licking my own balls.
36:06And she came round the corner like a lunatic and hit me.
36:07Yeah, but he's such a cutie.
36:08I've really fallen for him.
36:09Is there anyone here who can treat him?
36:10I can't let him die.
36:11I'm the presenter of For The Love Of Dogs.
36:12Of course, Miss Hammond.
36:13Do you know what?
36:14The hot vet will see you now.
36:15Oh.
36:16But I'm next.
36:17I'm next.
36:18I'm sorry, Mr Hill.
36:19Your cat's going to have to wait.
36:20It's not the cat I'm worried about.
36:21It's the Robins.
36:22I'm afraid Miss Hammond is next.
36:23But I'm on the telly.
36:24I know.
36:25I don't think there's anyone here who can treat him.
36:26There's anyone here who can treat him.
36:27I can't let him die.
36:28I'm the presenter of For The Love Of Dogs.
36:30Of course, Miss Hammond.
36:31Do you know what?
36:32The hot vet will see you now.
36:33But I'm next.
36:34I'm sorry, Mr Hill.
36:35Your cat's going to have to wait.
36:36It's not the cat I'm worried about.
36:37It's the Robins.
36:39I'm afraid Miss Hammond is next but I'm on the telly I know but not as much as Alison no one's on the
36:54telly as much as the hot vet will see you now somebody order a dream boat are you the hot
37:08vet yes I'm sweating buckets do you know how hard it is to operate with these little hands you look
37:15like a man who could really heal my heart I mean dog what kind of dog is it I don't know one of those
37:21really little whiny ones by the looks of it I tell you what why don't you come back to my charming
37:29little cottage and have Christmas with me and my children they've been missing a mother figure in
37:34her life ever since my wife died in a tragic Christmas kite accident and then we could go
37:40back to the big city and maybe you could become the resident vet on this morning there you go a
37:49little fella I'll get that on there boy stop whinging or I'll cut your bollocks off come on princess let's
37:59go oh what about my robins this Christmas Alex Brooker is the hot vet in Hallmark's new movie bet the
38:17hall all right it's time to bring out a Christmassy mystery guest Harry and Alison have to try to work
38:33out why they were in the news this year can we please have this week's mystery guest
38:38welcome Josh Alex who's the mystery guest this is Rob he was in the news this year for a Christmassy
38:54reason but what was it can we have the dramatic lighting change please so did Rob get suspended from
39:04Broadland radio for playing all I want for Christmas is you on October the third did he get suspended as
39:11a school exam invigilator after playing Merry Christmas everyone by Slade to signal the end of
39:17the final exam or did Rob get suspended by an Undertaker after mistakenly playing last Christmas
39:24rather than the last post at a funeral what do you think well I don't think you'd make a mistake at a
39:34funeral you'd be well prepared does he look like an Undertaker that's a gravedigger I'll tell you what
39:47we'll reveal the mystery guest after the break Rick Astley is gonna sing us into Christmas we'll see you in a
39:51a little bit welcome back to last leg we're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill Alex has now become full
40:15father Christmas you know what in another reality where the cards had fallen different he'd currently
40:30be doing that in a grotto in a garden center not entirely sure what's going on with your costume
40:35well I didn't think we had very long so I was the dog already so I just shoved mine on top of the dog
40:41okay so I'm boy George I do know I'm calling this outfit what here boy George
40:57clearly I'm Tom Hanks from castaway because when he first experiences pain due to an infected tooth that
41:10goes on to become an ongoing issue whilst he's on the island he's had a Christmas dinner and I've
41:16got the volleyball as well before the break we challenged our guest to work out how this
41:29person was connected to the news can we have the options again please yes this is Rob and he was
41:36connected to the news this year for Christmassy reason but what was it was it because Rob got
41:41suspended from Broadland radio for playing all I want for Christmas is you on October the 3rd was
41:47it because he got suspended as a school exam invigilator after playing Merry Christmas everyone by Slade to
41:53signal the end of the final exam or did he get suspended by an undertaker after mistakenly playing
41:59last Christmas rather than the last post that's a funeral oh Harry Allison could we could you say
42:09something sort of local radio ish we could see on the show well hi folks hope you're having a good Sunday
42:17uh yeah is that a good voice for radio could you could have said no Rob shall we go with the radio yes we think would they suspend someone just for playing it mean isn't it if they've done that that is mean it's a cutthroat world
42:38I won't be listening to that radio station anyway that's the last time you listen to Broadland radio I thought you said Broadmoor
42:47Rob can you reveal your identity please I am indeed Rob Chandler breakfast presenter at Broadland radio and I was suspended for playing a Mariah Carey Christmas song early in October
43:07early in October
43:08amazing
43:09amazing
43:10ooh
43:11indeed
43:12so why did you play it and then why did they suspend you
43:15well it started with a text from a listener called Becky who said she was putting out her Christmas stock in her shop and could I play a Christmas song so I thought tell you what if I get at least five listener texts saying ho ho ho
43:31ho ho
43:32one or two saying no no no but then Billy the taxi driver you must know Billy the taxi driver no
43:49another keen listener text and said there's a tub of chocolates in it for you if you play Mariah Carey all I want for Christmas is you so
44:01I came back after the news and I read that text out and I said quite frankly I'm disappointed Billy that you could think I could be so shallow to fall for such a blatant bribe
44:14yeah
44:15ding ding ding ding ding
44:16oh
44:17he played the song
44:19yeah
44:20how long was he suspended for how long was he suspended for
44:23one day
44:24oh is that all
44:25yeah
44:26did he go shopping what did he do
44:28yah well just stayed in bed all day
44:30chill day
44:31can we please have a round of applause for Rom
44:33All right, we are about to end the show with a Christmas sing-along from Rick Astley, but
44:42before we do, would you please thank our guests, Alison Hammond, Harry Hill, and my co-host Josh
44:52Riddickam, and Alex Brooker.
44:56We'll be back next week for our New Year's Eve special with an incredible line-up, musician
44:59Peter Doherty, comedians Maisie, Adam and Phil Wang, national treasure Sir Lenny Henry,
45:04TV personality Danny Dyer, rugby star Hannah Botterman, lioness Lucy Bronze, as well as
45:09a celebrity barman who is 100% faithful.
45:14Right now, though, Rick Astley is going to sing us into Christmas.
45:17Thanks for watching at Last Week.
45:18My name's Adam Hills.
45:19Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good night.
45:29You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why
45:37Santa Claus is coming to town.
45:42It's snowing road, let's go!
45:44He sees you when you're sleeping, he sees you when you're sleeping, he sees you when you're
46:14He knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake.
46:24You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why
46:30Santa Claus is coming to town.
46:36He's got eight billion toys on his sleigh, he's packed, he's coming your way, Santa, it's coming to town.
46:49Ba-ba-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da
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