- 24 minutes ago
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Merry Christmas!
00:27Merry Christmas!
00:28Merry Christmas!
00:30Is it though?
00:31Cos I'm out here in the cold running a mulled wine stall that was your idea while you're
00:35in the warm like the ghost of Christmas.
00:37Merry Christmas!
00:38Oh, I don't know who he was.
00:39Get your bum out here now.
00:41Go have it.
00:43I don't expect him a shot any time.
00:46It's a public street and it's on Christmas Day.
00:49That means it's not allowed, is it?
00:51Merry blah blah.
00:52Why don't you have some of this muck?
00:54Well, salesperson of the year.
00:55Cheers.
00:56Hiya, Lord.
00:57Merry Christmas.
00:58Merry Christmas.
00:59Looks like we should be singing Feed the World.
01:03We will not be caught with insufficient food, will we?
01:05Look at all those vegetables!
01:07I know!
01:08You're not wearing your present?
01:09Er, er, no, I will.
01:11Right, come on.
01:12Let the peeling commence after you, governor.
01:17What present has he got that you can't wear out here?
01:20Do we really want to know?
01:21He got me a Cardi.
01:23Right, because you're 74 years of age.
01:25And, er, murder mystery thing.
01:26Where have you got to go for that?
01:27Oh, I don't know.
01:28Some hotel in Webberfield.
01:29Where?
01:30Oh, God knows.
01:31Webberfield?
01:32Oh, God knows.
01:33Weatherfield.
01:34Merida.
01:35Merry Christmas!
01:36Too early?
01:37I like that you're so keen.
01:39Oh, Merry Christmas.
01:40Oh, Merry Christmas.
01:41Oh, Merry Christmas.
01:42Yeah.
01:43Merry Christmas.
01:44Ho, ho, ho.
01:45We're still on for yours later.
01:46Uh-huh.
01:47Right.
01:48Been late afternoon.
01:49Got a few guests here.
01:50Oh.
01:51Oh.
01:52Oh.
01:53Oh.
01:54Oh.
01:55Oh.
01:56Oh.
01:57Oh.
01:58Oh.
01:59Oh.
02:00Oh.
02:01Oh.
02:02Oh.
02:03Oh.
02:04Oh.
02:05Oh.
02:06Oh.
02:07Been late afternoon.
02:08Got a few guests here.
02:09Right.
02:10See you later.
02:11Yeah.
02:12Hey.
02:13Merry Christmas.
02:14Good to you.
02:15I got a scooter.
02:16Yeah, sir.
02:17Yay.
02:18So that means that no one's safe.
02:19Why don't we go and terrorise the rest of the village?
02:21Come on.
02:22Yeah, go.
02:25Eh, question.
02:26How come I didn't get a scooter?
02:28I've spent enough on you on My Little Pony, thank you.
02:31Got another one, love?
02:33Yeah, I got one.
02:34Not for me.
02:35I've, er, actually got somewhere.
02:37Gonna look after you.
02:38Very good.
02:41Robert, where you going?
02:43Merry Christmas!
02:44Merry Christmas!
03:01So, do you like it?
03:02Yeah.
03:03Really?
03:04Of course.
03:05Right, well, why are you just giving one-word answers then?
03:09I love it.
03:10Thanks.
03:11It's just them two.
03:12Flipping hijacking things yesterday.
03:13I know, I'm not exactly chuffed about it either, but let's not let it ruin our Christmas
03:15as well.
03:16Oh my god, this is so much better than mine.
03:17I know.
03:18Did you just guess it was gonna be a girl?
03:19I bought two lots.
03:20I'm sending the blue ones back.
03:21Yeah, very clever.
03:22Hey!
03:23Happy Christmas!
03:24Happy Christmas!
03:25Yeah.
03:26Yeah.
03:27What he said.
03:28Sorry, got a bit of a head.
03:29Celebrating, were you?
03:30Only a bit.
03:31Sure, how are we?
03:32Disappointed.
03:33It was a bit, you know.
03:34It was massively out of order.
03:35I'm bonkers.
03:36It was massively out of order.
03:37I'm bonkers.
03:38I'm bonkers.
03:39I'm bonkers.
03:40I'm bonkers.
03:41Yeah.
03:42What he said.
03:43Sorry, got a bit of a head.
03:48Celebrating, were you?
03:49Only a bit.
03:51Sure.
03:52How are we?
03:57Disappointed.
03:58It was a bit, you know.
04:01It was massively out of order.
04:03Yeah.
04:04I'm bonkers.
04:05Last night was supposed to be our wedding night.
04:07Well, you don't need the ring to do the thing.
04:10Seriously.
04:11Sorry.
04:12Well, tell me at your grounds.
04:15Whenever we want.
04:16Yeah.
04:17The sooner the better.
04:18I'm getting dressed.
04:19Sherry?
04:26Computer, stop.
04:28Would you like me to play more Christmas music?
04:31Definitely not.
04:32Now playing Jingle Bell Rock.
04:35Computer, stop.
04:36Oh, no.
04:37Now playing Gold.
04:38Computer, stop.
04:39Oh, I swear.
04:40Now playing Walking in the Air.
04:41Oh, I like this one.
04:42Here's the thing.
04:43about knocking on a door.
04:44Oh, I like this one.
04:45Here's the thing about knocking on a door.
04:46Oh, no.
04:47Oh, no.
04:48Now playing Gold.
04:50Oh, no.
04:51Now playing Gold.
04:52Oh, no.
04:53Now playing Gold.
04:54Oh, no.
04:55Computer, stop.
04:56Oh, I swear.
04:57Now playing Walking in the Air.
04:59Oh, no.
05:00This one.
05:01There you go, Mary.
05:05Oh, no.
05:06Well, I like this one.
05:07Here's the thing about knocking on a door that you don't seem to understand.
05:12Spare me the sarcasm.
05:13that you don't seem to understand.
05:16Spare me the sarcasm.
05:18Wow, what did you get for Christmas?
05:20Big box feisty?
05:21I made a mistake yesterday when I binned you off.
05:25Making one now if you think that's what happened.
05:28I may have overreacted slightly.
05:32Truth is, I need a posh friend in my life.
05:35Gives me an air of mystery.
05:37Like people think, oh, I wonder what Kim sees in that one.
05:40And it's nice.
05:42Just being here.
05:44Basking in your magnificence.
05:47And it makes me realise how lucky I am.
05:49You and I being mates.
05:51Like when you're having issues with your caviar not being the right temperature.
05:55Or too many bubbles in your champagne.
05:57And I think to myself,
05:59at least I don't have Kim's troubles.
06:03So, I'm willing to accept your apology
06:06and give you another chance.
06:09You better pour yourself a drink then.
06:12What kind of host are you?
06:13How are you?
06:36Good, thanks.
06:36How are you, really?
06:44Not great.
06:45Come here.
06:46Come on here, cos Johnny pestered.
07:00Noted.
07:02Where's the rest of you boys?
07:04Well, Noah's out working for triple time.
07:07And get this,
07:08Ryan's gone for a turkey curry
07:09with someone called Stabwound,
07:12who we met gaming.
07:12So he's definitely getting murdered.
07:15Do you want to drink?
07:17Yeah, I'll just have one.
07:18Oh, knock yourself out, Vanessa.
07:21Slow down, Moses.
07:22And put your helmet on.
07:26He should be wearing a helmet.
07:27You're a helmet.
07:28Get a drink and just shut up.
07:29Oh, sorry.
07:37Is there a speed limit?
07:40No, there isn't.
07:40You crack on.
07:43How are you cracking on with your issue?
07:46Well, it's only an issue
07:48if someone makes it an issue.
07:50It's hardly the subject for Christmas Day, is it?
07:52Oh, I don't know.
07:53A pregnant woman and the father
07:55not being who everyone thinks it is.
07:57Oh, cute.
07:59Merry Christmas!
08:00Merry Christmas!
08:01Merry Christmas!
08:03Cheers, auntie.
08:04I didn't know you were coming for dinner.
08:05Oh, no, we're not.
08:07Oh, Johnny and Moses just said you are.
08:08He's well excited.
08:09We don't mind, do we?
08:10No, we don't mind.
08:12Brilliant idea.
08:12Hey, Merry Christmas!
08:18Where's Eve?
08:18It's upstairs with Harry.
08:20Doing what?
08:20I don't know, do I?
08:21Oh.
08:22Oh, you've got to own it.
08:23It's wonderful.
08:24Yeah, you'll fit right in it, WI.
08:25Right, come on, Cardi B.
08:27Get some of these pigs.
08:28How many are we feeding?
08:38Has Robert come round to yours?
08:39No.
08:40Why?
08:40Did he say he was good at it?
08:41Well, he's just got off
08:42so now he's not answering his phone.
08:43What, at all?
08:44What do you mean, at all?
08:45He's not going to answer it a little bit, is he?
08:46Don't get crappy.
08:47What, I'm worried, Vic.
08:48So where is he now, then?
08:49I don't know.
08:50I don't know.
08:55I don't know.
09:29Right, let's see who runs, ready?
09:45Oh, I won!
09:48Oh, sorry Liam.
09:49Right, come on you.
09:50Let's go sit down.
09:52Wow, that Christmas lunch with Bernice really got to you, didn't it?
09:55Not the great famine of 2018, not at all.
09:59I wouldn't worry about Robert Love.
10:01Well you would, if you knew that Kev's back, firing guns.
10:05What?
10:06What is back?
10:08Someone took a shot at us yesterday.
10:11What was this?
10:12At Butler's.
10:13The police reckon it was just poachers and they were stray shots.
10:17Yeah, well they're probably right.
10:18Yeah, until we got back and there was an envelope with Kev's wedding ring and a bullet in it.
10:23Oh my goodness.
10:25Do you reckon we should go and look for him?
10:26I was just going to suggest it actually.
10:28No, hang on, hang on.
10:29Where are you even going to look?
10:30I don't know.
10:31We can't just sit here.
10:32Maybe you should call the police.
10:33And say what?
10:34That my fully grown adult boyfriend's been missing for a couple of hours.
10:37Well I think I'd also suggest the shooting, the bullet and the ring.
10:40No Charles?
10:43He came earlier.
10:45Thought I'd give him space to be with Ethan by himself.
10:49Never gets any easier, does it?
10:52Tell me about it.
10:53Like Christmas isn't difficult enough.
10:56I've got three brothers here as well as my dad.
10:59You must miss them very much.
11:02It's been so long.
11:04Sometimes it feels like they were never here at all.
11:06But you must feel like Ethan's barely been gone.
11:13There are still days Charles and I still call his name.
11:17Give him my best.
11:26What are you doing here?
11:29I'm looking to buy a new carpet.
11:30So as I can sweep everything that's happened recently under it.
11:40Looks like you've already started that.
11:44Congratulations by the way.
11:46On your engagement.
11:49Thanks.
11:49Thanks.
12:00I miss him.
12:05Yeah, same.
12:07I miss you.
12:10And you.
12:12Me?
12:14Ooh.
12:15Sorry.
12:16It's Christmas.
12:18And?
12:18What happens at Christmas?
12:20Well, what usually happens is families fall out.
12:24We've already done that.
12:27So is anyone open to moving on to the next phase?
12:31What's that?
12:33We stand around awkwardly.
12:35Not so much.
12:36And then at some point, preferably very soon,
12:40your bags appear in the hallway at home.
12:42And it's kind of accepted that you've moved back in.
12:45That might work.
12:52Let the awkward standing commence.
12:55Oh, yes.
12:57Let's get some roasties.
12:59Oops.
12:59Oh, hi.
13:00Do you want some?
13:01Do you want some?
13:01Hey.
13:02I told you to wait for your dad.
13:06You OK?
13:08Yeah.
13:08Have you been to Netsgrave?
13:11Yeah, I have.
13:12Come here.
13:14Right, come on.
13:15Let's get this show on the road, then.
13:17You know, we've still got time for our knees, that.
13:19I've got my feet up.
13:20Old.
13:21Yeah, so old.
13:22Can't even make it to the food.
13:25Come on.
13:26Has this got opened all the presents?
13:28Er, no, not yet.
13:29Oh, ho, ho.
13:32Come on.
13:33Come on, Adia.
13:34Oh, what have you got?
13:37What have you got?
13:40Brilliant, thank you.
13:42Yeah, pass this to your brother.
13:44Oh, what have you got?
13:51What have you got?
13:54Right.
13:56Hello.
13:57Come on, bro.
13:58Hey, how are we all?
14:00Hi.
14:00Hey.
14:01How's me big man?
14:02Merry Christmas.
14:03Merry Christmas.
14:05Oh.
14:06Hello, Ken.
14:07Because it's, er, a spanner.
14:12Yeah, I get it.
14:13Merry Christmas.
14:14Hey, Merry Christmas.
14:15Oh, did you get anything nice?
14:17Well done.
14:18I need to get back to.
14:19And, how are you, mister?
14:26It's just another day with our aims, isn't it?
14:29Not really.
14:30No.
14:31No, not really.
14:32No, come here.
14:35Anyway, what do you think she would want me to do, eh, your mum, if she was here?
14:39Have a good time.
14:40So, what are we going to do, then?
14:42Happy birthday.
14:44Nailed it.
14:45Right, erm, do we get our own drinks or do you, like, control it?
14:49Control, Gary.
14:51Right, come on in.
14:53Brought you some company.
14:55Thanks.
14:57A lot.
14:58I really appreciate this.
15:02I don't relish the prospect of being in that house all day.
15:05Oh, happy birthday.
15:07Hope they're not imposing too much.
15:09How much is too much?
15:11Well, we're enjoying being here just as much as you are having us.
15:14Kim, sit down, get comfy.
15:17And you guys.
15:18Get on the, er, set here.
15:19Thanks, Sam and Lydia and Belle.
15:22Yeah, no worries.
15:23Has Billy got the kids?
15:25Yeah.
15:26Feel like we should have some kind of plaque.
15:28Kim Tate's sat here.
15:29Well, I've got a box of them.
15:31I'll bring you one.
15:32Really?
15:33A nose.
15:34Oh, right.
15:36Jorks.
15:37Er, drinks.
15:40Well, Merry Christmas, everyone.
15:42Merry Christmas.
15:43Feels like I should let you drink from the welly,
15:45but it's only really for people joining family.
15:48Well, disappointed as I am not to be drinking moonshine
15:51from weather-resistant footwear,
15:53I'll try not to let it ruin my festive mood.
15:56Will this do?
15:57Oh.
15:57My absolute favourite.
16:07Merry Christmas.
16:07Happy Christmas.
16:10Greetings.
16:11Oh, Merry Christmas.
16:12Merry Christmas and all that.
16:15Where's your dad and the kids?
16:16Well, he fell asleep, so they're drawing on his face.
16:19Nobody ever wants to finish deviling him.
16:21Yeah, Dottie's gone round to film it for YouTube.
16:23I thought I heard an entrance.
16:25Oh, Merry Christmas.
16:26This do you?
16:27Um, have you two met properly?
16:29Well, he's been at the cafe about half a million times.
16:32No, formally I meant.
16:33Like in Westminster Abbey or Summer?
16:37Well, I've heard a lot about you.
16:39Oh, really?
16:40No, but you make a good coffee.
16:42Not been bigging me up, then?
16:46I'll let your majestic presence speak for it, sir.
16:49In a decade's time, this is what you'll have to deal with from her.
16:53Oh, I'll settle for that.
17:00Hey!
17:01Excuse me.
17:02Wow.
17:03You've finished already.
17:05I was assuming drinking quickly was some sort of rule.
17:08Yeah, but we haven't had a toast yet.
17:09Well, you're going to have to do it without me because we are going for a walk with Vinny.
17:13Is this pre-planned or is it an escape?
17:16Pre-planned, promise.
17:17But I might see you later.
17:19It's all right.
17:19Sorry.
17:21Right then.
17:22What, er, what we're drinking to?
17:26Business as usual?
17:28Business as usual.
17:29Er, can I just check?
17:31Are you two under the impression that I'm giving you your jobs back?
17:35Because I want to make it very clear that I am.
17:39Oh, you beggar.
17:41You had us going, then.
17:44Hey, Sam.
17:46What?
17:49No.
17:49What?
17:51It's your arm.
17:52Won't what?
17:53Drink from the welly.
17:55Drink from the welly.
17:58Drink from the welly.
17:59This is getting weird.
18:02I am uncomfortable.
18:03Drink from the welly!
18:05Drink from the welly!
18:07Drink from the welly!
18:09Drink from the welly!
18:15Yay!
18:17Still don't mean you're a dingle, Will.
18:19Oh, imagine my devastation.
18:21Not that this isn't the pinnacle of my drinking experiences,
18:25but would anyone care for some red wine from my salon?
18:28I thought you just kept corpses in that.
18:30Yes, that sounds really good. Let's go.
18:32OK, I'll come with you.
18:33Can I choose some or not?
18:34Well, we'd be foolish to disregard your impeccable taste.
18:38Is that a yes or a no?
18:39Come on, Sam.
18:42It's all right, Ives.
18:43Nothing with dust on.
18:47I was banging on at you a bit earlier, weren't I?
18:51Well, we all need banging on at from time to time.
18:55But time to time, not all the time.
18:58Noted.
18:59You know, you're lucky.
19:03I know.
19:04And Sam is extremely lucky.
19:06I don't know about that.
19:08Yes, you do.
19:10He looks after me.
19:11Well, I'm glad to hear it.
19:15Would you mind if I looked after you two?
19:18What do you mean?
19:19Oh, like, say, you still inheriting Home Farm?
19:31Have you forgotten how to count?
19:33I've tried to prepare for everything beyond the extent of preparation.
19:37Do you know who's in there?
19:38Nelson Mandela.
19:39Taylor Swift.
19:41Right, come on.
19:42Let's go look for him.
19:43Chas, can you watch Harry?
19:44No need.
19:45But he's about to turn six, not six.
19:47Finally!
19:49You knew I was nipping out.
19:50And where have you been getting your phone fixed?
19:52I've been calling you.
19:53What, because I've been gone a couple of hours?
19:54And it's been longer than that.
19:56Well, it must have been on silent.
19:57Sorry.
19:58Well, it's just, we thought, you know...
20:01Kev had got you.
20:02Told us about it yesterday.
20:03What?
20:04No, no.
20:05Don't worry about that.
20:06Done with that madman interfering with our lives.
20:08Hello, hello!
20:09Hey!
20:10Best of greetings.
20:11Oh, hiya.
20:12Merry Christmas.
20:13I thought you were off seeing Steph.
20:14Nana's tomorrow.
20:15Are we all right?
20:16Yes, don't worry.
20:17The Taylor Swift Appreciation Society has got it all covered.
20:20She caught you in that sparkly dress again.
20:21You wish.
20:22Oh, you come bearing gifts.
20:24How come you're suddenly not worried any more?
20:27Because what's the point?
20:29It's Christmas.
20:31Relax.
20:52So, Eric, this thing with you and Kerry, was it a slow burn or...?
21:01Kerry and I have been extremely fond of each other for a very long time.
21:07And the fondness has blossomed into a deep and mutual love.
21:08Right?
21:09Thought to catch it.
21:10Oh.
21:11Right.
21:12Oh.
21:13Right.
21:14Oh.
21:15Right.
21:16Now what?
21:17Eat it or put it on your heart.
21:18Hey!
21:19Hey!
21:20Hey!
21:21Hey!
21:22Hey!
21:23Hey!
21:24So good, so good!
21:25So good, so well!
21:27Oh, y-hoo!
21:28Nice fit, mate!
21:29A counterfeit.
21:30Thanks for these.
21:31They're great.
21:33Let's catch it.
21:35Oh, right.
21:39And now what?
21:42Eat it, or put it on your heart.
21:46Sweet, sweet.
21:50Nice fit, mate.
21:51A counterfeit.
21:53Thanks for these. They're great.
21:55You're welcome, babe.
21:56So are you like our granddad?
21:59Now you two are married.
22:02Is that OK?
22:04Doesn't make a difference.
22:06Oh, banger.
22:09Oh, there she goes.
22:17Yes, kid.
22:18No, kid.
22:22Hey, where are you going?
22:23Quiet Christmas, you said.
22:24Right, come on, you, let's go.
22:25Bring that with you.
22:26OK, see you later. Take care. Bye.
22:28Bye.
22:28Oh, one of them stoops a visit downstairs.
22:39Are the other two joining us any time soon?
22:40I mean, do they know it's Christmas time?
22:43At all?
22:43Well, the presents were a bit of a clue, but yeah.
22:48I've got a little something for you.
22:50Dylan!
22:51Are you a guest?
22:53All right, everyone. Merry Christmas.
22:55You said you couldn't get out of hospital.
22:57Yeah, I lied. I'm out.
22:57How are you feeling, sweetheart?
22:58Uh, better for seeing this one.
23:00Well, it's been so long.
23:03You OK?
23:05Hello.
23:06Come here. I love you.
23:08Going to be all right, aren't we?
23:09Yeah.
23:09Where's Eve?
23:12With Chas.
23:13Where's your mum?
23:14With Charles and Claudette.
23:16Oh, she's blown you out of shit.
23:18Yeah, that's it.
23:20At least you know where your parent is.
23:25Sorry.
23:39I've got a beer, wife.
23:47It's Christmas Day, I think.
24:04OK, right, I'll make the book.
24:06Oh, this should be good.
24:07Oh, what the ladybird heard?
24:10No?
24:11What the ladybird heard next?
24:13Well, that's the only two books you've ever read.
24:15Oh, er, The Godfather.
24:16That's a book.
24:17No, no, no, no.
24:18We have to wait, right, for how many birds first.
24:21Right, of course.
24:22All two.
24:23Oh, four words.
24:24That's barely a headline.
24:26That's how many words are in the title.
24:28Oh, er, Fifty Shades of Grey.
24:30Oh, well, if you start mumming, now I'm gouging me on out.
24:33No, Grey is going to give us some clues, all right.
24:36Go on, go on.
24:36You're like Crocodile Dundee when he went to New York and had not a clue what was going on.
24:41Ooh, Jimmy and his highbrow cultural reference.
24:43Anyway, you, Ray knows plenty about Christmas.
24:45Show him your bracelet.
24:46No, no, no, no, no.
24:47Show him.
24:47You're playing a game.
24:48We're playing a game.
24:50Ooh, fancy.
24:52What have you been doing?
24:52Mining cryptocurrency?
24:54Oh, nothing that lucrative.
24:55Lucrative enough?
24:57I had nothing better to spend my money on.
24:58Oh, thanks.
24:59No, no, I didn't lucrative enough.
25:00Oh, no, don't battle.
25:02I'm really offended.
25:04Look, this is going to take all day.
25:05I'm going to give you a verbal clue.
25:07It's what I want to do to Nicola sometimes.
25:10Sexy time.
25:10Oh, no.
25:11Not on a Thursday.
25:12Oh, my God.
25:14I know it.
25:16Tequila mockingbird.
25:18Ooh.
25:19You got it.
25:20Thanks, thorny man.
25:22Wait till you're asleep and see what happens to your face.
25:25Right, come and get another drink.
25:26And then I'm telling you everything you're going to be buying me for Christmas next year.
25:29Have you got a play?
25:31Is this too much?
25:32This is the best Christmas ever.
25:34Oh, I don't know whether that makes me really happy or really sad.
25:37Well, it makes me happy.
25:38Well, play your cards right and you can have another one of these next year.
25:45Yeah?
25:46Yeah.
25:51Decent, that one.
25:52Thank you for your effusive praise.
25:55Hey, hey.
25:56So, I've got you one more present.
25:58Well, I sort of maybe kind of got it for myself, but you ready?
26:01Go on.
26:04Hey?
26:06Yeah.
26:06We used to play that to Destruction when you were little, didn't we?
26:10I mean, literally, I think we went through about four of them.
26:12I had to buy a new one every other Christmas.
26:13And how did you manage that?
26:14Well, I used to...
26:15I found it very tense.
26:16I used to snap the little plastic doors.
26:18Yeah, you used to rage quit every time you lost, I seem to recall.
26:22I did not.
26:23Always.
26:24Anyway, she used to have such weird questions.
26:26Does yours look like it could ride a horse?
26:28Yeah, I won every time.
26:30Ridiculously.
26:31So, we're playing then, or what?
26:32Well, it sounds dangerous.
26:33Yeah, and it's only for two players.
26:34It's only two players.
26:35Look, we can team up.
26:37We can take turns.
26:40I just...
26:41I feel really lucky to be having this Christmas after where we were last year.
26:45And this would just be the icing on the cake.
26:48Indulge your old dad.
26:50Fine.
26:50Yeah?
26:51We'll play at the table.
26:52So you can turn it over and you lose.
26:56There's pudding.
26:56No!
26:57No!
27:00I'll just turn it in a sec.
27:02Can you just help Dylan?
27:03Yeah.
27:06One sec.
27:07All right.
27:13Hello?
27:15I'm coming.
27:16Things are going to be okay.
27:17Do you know that?
27:19Yeah, I do.
27:19It's me.
27:34Promise me you'll leave my family alone.
27:35Okay.
27:39Then I'll do it.
27:41I'll come with you.
27:42Yeah.
27:43Come on.
27:46What a surprise.
28:11You're good at making ladies' drinks.
28:12Do you want a soft drink?
28:14Oh, I do.
28:15It's pretty good, that man.
28:17I can't believe you lost.
28:19Are they beetroot?
28:20Wow.
28:20I don't know.
28:22Why don't we play cards against decency?
28:24Oh, yeah.
28:25No, we can't.
28:26I went and chucked them out.
28:28Why?
28:28Because he was reading all the cards and quoting from them randomly.
28:32It's like we were living with Frankie Boyle.
28:34I know a game I can play.
28:36Go on, then.
28:38Let's play Truth or Dare.
28:42Oh, nah.
28:44That's well boring.
28:46And anyway, everyone chooses dares, so.
28:48So, you book the trend then, Charity.
28:51Go Truth.
28:53Ooh.
28:54Anyone want another drink?
28:55Mm.
28:56Yeah, yeah, I'll have another one, thanks.
28:57Or I've got another one.
28:59Oh, this is a really good one.
29:01Never Have I Ever.
29:03Shall we play that?
29:04Why don't we play it in a minute when you've had some fresh air, darling?
29:06Never Have I Ever.
29:08Ooh.
29:09Let's think.
29:10What shall I go with?
29:11Never Have I Ever.
29:13Come on.
29:14Never Have I Ever.
29:16Ripped anyone's head off their shelves, let's play.
29:18Do you know what?
29:19The night is yet young.
29:20Come on.
29:21Never Have I Ever.
29:22Never Have You Ever been this drunk, lady.
29:24Oh, no, wait, that's right.
29:48Not yet, you haven't, because I'm going to cut it off and that's just for a start.
29:54Well, that's a big threat from a man in your very precarious position.
30:01You're not, I know who you are.
30:26No.
30:27Saved on introductions.
30:28Johnny Psycho, the murderer.
30:31Not true.
30:33Hmm.
30:35That kid wraps himself up in tarp oil and jumps in the lake of the air.
30:38Show some respect.
30:40That kid had a name.
30:43Neat.
30:44And his death was an accident.
30:46Right.
30:47Well, I'll be why nobody hates you, then.
30:50Nobody refers you as a massive nutter.
30:52Not very popular, though, yeah.
31:06Truth be told, I made some mistakes.
31:10I let things slip.
31:11But now I'm going to make up for it.
31:16The storm's coming.
31:21Not literally, idiot.
31:24Read.
31:28You caused a bit of one, though, didn't you?
31:30What, with your little siege?
31:32Yeah, I read all about that in the news.
31:34Sword.
31:35Very, er...
31:36Very visually arresting.
31:40Not quite as effective as a bullet, though.
31:42I came this close.
31:44To putting one through your husband's head yesterday.
31:48Just after I drugged you and stopped you shooting my husband.
31:51No, I was so wrong about you.
31:56You're completely mentally stable.
31:59Aaron really does not know what he's missing.
32:01Aaron is not going to miss out on anything.
32:03He knows where his future lies.
32:06But there's a bit of work to be done first, though.
32:09Because this is your little squat, is it?
32:12I like what you've done with the place.
32:14Well, I see.
32:16Yours, it's, er...
32:17It's mine, now.
32:18Well, it suits you.
32:23Just need to knock together a little padded cell for you.
32:27Because that's where you're ending up.
32:29I'm ending up with Aaron.
32:31Together, like we are meant to be.
32:34Happy, content, and committed to each other.
32:37With you and Robert nowhere to be seen by anyone ever again.
32:43Tell me one thing me coming clean will achieve.
32:46I'll tell you two.
32:48She'll know the truth.
32:49Jacob will know the truth.
32:50And also Mac will know the truth.
32:51And yet, I know that's three.
32:52I've had a drink, Sue me.
32:54Oh, no, beautiful speech, Vanessa.
32:56Have you got another one to help Sarah
32:58pick herself up off the floor once her life's in bits?
33:01Feels like that's your job, don't you think?
33:04No, it doesn't have to be anybody's job
33:05if I just...
33:06If they just...
33:06If they just lie to her for the rest of her life.
33:09She's never going to forgive me for this,
33:10and you know that.
33:11Mmm.
33:17Effort that, Liam.
33:18You know, I've always thought of Eat and Mess
33:20as one of those terrible games
33:21that they play at boarding school.
33:22Oh!
33:24Well, it's a good thing we've finished our food
33:25before you gave us that disgusting image.
33:27Kindred spirits.
33:34Oh, cute.
33:35I am, actually, yeah.
33:36Do you have any idea how hard it is
33:37to find a grave on Christmas Day?
33:39She's that where you've been.
33:44Oh, sorry, is this a private party?
33:51It doesn't have to be. Sit down.
33:53We didn't want to intrude.
33:54No, no, no, not at all.
33:56It's Mary not with you.
33:57No, she's a...
33:58She's a very keen Scrabble player.
34:00Very keen.
34:01And serious.
34:03We didn't lie to her.
34:05I said I wanted to check on Kevin.
34:06Well.
34:07To see if he'd checked in with you at all.
34:09Has he?
34:10No.
34:11I got a card.
34:13Just said Kay.
34:15I know what he's done.
34:17But no-one should be alone at this time if you...
34:18Do you want a drink?
34:20Ooh.
34:21I reckon Clorette could be trouble on bubbles.
34:23I'm not.
34:24I'm Randy on Shandy.
34:25I'll have a Shandy.
34:28No, just joking.
34:30Or am I?
34:33Cheers, everyone.
34:34Well, just hang on a sec.
34:40I'm not really a fan of publicly humiliating myself.
34:44Oh, well, that's not true, but carry on.
34:46Oh, it's good.
34:47It's very good.
34:49Um, I just...
34:50I just wanted to say, this year's been a bit...
34:54Well, I mean, even by our standards, it's, uh...
34:56It's been a weird one.
35:00It's been hard, mostly.
35:03And very hard.
35:05Sometimes.
35:05It's scary.
35:11And...
35:12It's been sad.
35:15Mm.
35:17But it's also been...
35:20Amazing.
35:22And although you...
35:23Most of you are...
35:25A pain in the backside.
35:27Um, you're family.
35:31We're family.
35:32And I'm glad we've got each other.
35:37So, you know...
35:38Merry Christmas.
35:41Merry Christmas.
35:42Merry Christmas.
35:44Merry Christmas.
35:45To family.
35:47Well, and you.
35:48Sarah wants this baby so much.
35:52No, she wants her baby so much.
35:55And this isn't that.
35:57You got pregnant by your husband.
36:00Your husband, who's already had one child
36:03ripped out of his life.
36:04And despite your age-defying lady bits,
36:08isn't likely to get another chance at being a dad.
36:10Charity, it's just...
36:11It's so wrong on so many levels.
36:15Do you know what else it is?
36:16None of my business.
36:18Bingo.
36:19So, do you know what I'm going to do?
36:20Right now.
36:21I'm going to go home,
36:22and I suggest you follow,
36:23and get Johnny,
36:24and go home yourself.
36:25Preferably,
36:26without shouting your mouth off.
36:45Merry Christmas.
36:46Merry Christmas.
36:47Merry Christmas.
36:48Merry Christmas.
36:50Right, torch is on.
36:53Okay.
36:54Let's go see Grandad.
36:55Do you want it?
36:55We'll swap.
36:58Bye.
37:01Bit of it quiet on the way over here.
37:05You been thinking about your mum?
37:07Always.
37:10I didn't even get to buy her a present.
37:11Oh, yeah.
37:13Oh, have we got to buy her a present again?
37:17Ka-ching.
37:22What are we doing?
37:25Well, you didn't think that spanner was your Christmas present, did you?
37:28Yeah.
37:29What's this?
37:40It's a lot of hard work.
37:41So are you up for it?
37:43Me?
37:44Why?
37:46Because this is your car.
37:48Merry Christmas, son.
37:50Do you actually mind?
37:52I mean, it's a bit of a stare at the moment.
37:54OK.
37:57Well, it won't be when we're finished, though,
37:59cos me and you are going to turn this into the best car for miles.
38:03Three years.
38:04What?
38:05Well, you know, until you're old enough to drive it when you're 17.
38:09So you're up for it or what?
38:10Yeah, definitely.
38:17All right.
38:47Like I didn't exist.
39:17Can you just walk into me, please?
39:24Well, we're certain it's me that's walking into you, are we?
39:27Absolutely.
39:28110%.
39:29Oh, no.
39:30Don't be that person.
39:31What person?
39:33A butcher of percentages.
39:36Butcherer is not a word.
39:38Yes, it is.
39:39What's it mean, then?
39:41Someone...
39:42Who butchers?
39:44It's just a butcher.
39:46Are you going to open the door, then, or what?
39:47You've got the keys.
39:48Oh, you've got the keys.
39:49You've got the keys in your hand right now.
39:52Oh.
39:54I think I might be a bit drunk.
39:56Yeah, well, you're stone-cold sober compared to Aaron.
39:59Do you think you're still asleep?
40:01Oh, yeah.
40:02You'll be flat out in that back room all night.
40:04All right.
40:08Push.
40:13Where have you been?
40:15Out.
40:16Yeah, I think the clue was when you walked back in.
40:19Where'd you go?
40:20Went for a walk.
40:23Oh, right.
40:24Be like that, Mr. International Man of Mystery.
40:31So, not an easy day, then.
40:34Oh, it's been fun.
40:38Where is everyone?
40:40Er, Vanessa and Johnny have gone home.
40:43Sarah and Jacob went out with Moses on his new scooter,
40:46and Ross trailed off like a bad smell on a gentle breeze.
40:52We are alone.
40:55For once.
40:57Do you want to take advantage?
40:59Mm-hmm.
41:01Are we good?
41:03We're great.
41:04Come on, then.
41:07Hey!
41:07Glad tidings running all!
41:14Hey! Glad tidings one and all!
41:34Oh, back at you, boy!
41:36Hold up!
41:44Oh, back at you!
42:14That's better.
42:30Big day, eh? Big year.
42:35I thought it was going to be the best year ever, but...
42:39Hey, I'll go check. Won't be sick.
42:44I'll go check it out.
43:14No, he's fine.
43:18He won't be tomorrow, but that's his problem.
43:22So many people care about you, but not one of them as much as I do.
43:352025 has been a shocking year, but...
43:41But 26, no.
43:44That is going to be the best year ever.
43:48Because you and me, we're going to be together.
43:51No matter what.
43:53No matter what.
43:54No matter what.
43:58No matter what, it's amazing.
44:00No matter what the world goes down for you...
44:05Transcription by CastingWords
Be the first to comment