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The Boulet Brothers’ Holiday of Horrors Season 1 Episode 1

#The Boulet Brothers’ Holiday of Horrors
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Transcript
00:00Christmas is here
00:30Merry, merry, merry Christmas
00:32Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas
00:34On, on they said, on without end
00:36Their joyful tongue to everyone
00:38On how the bells, swift silver bells
00:40All sing to sing, from pairs away
00:43Christmas is here, bringing the chin
00:45To young and old, meek and the god
00:48To everyone, on, on they said
00:50On without end, their joyful tongue to everyone
01:00Shabbat Shalom
01:02Shabbat Shalom
01:04The suffrage
01:17Happy Holidays, Uglies.
01:37At first glance, the Christmas season can seem joyful, warm, and inviting.
01:43The glow of twinkling lights.
01:45The laughter around the fire.
01:47Ah, the scent of pine and cinnamon.
01:51But turn the diamond just slightly, and those happy images can turn very cold.
01:57The kind of chill that seeps into the marrow and gnaws at the soul.
02:02The laughter becomes strained.
02:04The crackling fire whispers of secrets best left buried.
02:08For some, Christmas is not joy, but a pageant of isolation.
02:13Empty rooms where laughter once echoed.
02:16Gifts left unopened beneath a dying tree.
02:20And even for those wrapped in the warmth of family, there are other horrors.
02:25The smiling Santa who lingers outside your window.
02:29The cheerful gift all glitter and bows with something sharp beneath the ribbon.
02:33Yes, for every tale of joy, there is one of terror.
02:38Christmas is a time of gifts and gatherings, but also of ghosts and grief.
02:44And sometimes, the most frightening thing about the holidays is the company you keep.
02:53Which reminds me, even we ourselves have a special guest this Christmas.
02:59Drac, do be a dear, and illuminate our guest.
03:05After all, nothing says holiday cheer quite like the flicker of Christmas lights.
03:12Ah, yes, the true spirit of giving.
03:15Giving someone a little spark of life.
03:18Or rather, a lot.
03:21Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
03:22Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
03:31Ah, ah, ah.
03:32Don't struggle, darling. It's just the thrill of reanimation. It never quite loses its charm.
03:52My darlings, I should have known I'd be spending the holidays with you two, whether I liked it or not.
04:05David, really, what is Christmas without a few forcibly festive guests gracing the gathering?
04:11Yes, but I must say there is nothing more horrifying than waking up here with you two year after year.
04:19It's like the ghosts of Christmas past with a vendetta.
04:23Well, now that you're awake and appropriately charged, let's begin our festivities properly.
04:31Yes, to truly capture the season's spirit, it's time for our first tale of holiday cheer.
04:38A story about family, about the bonds that never truly break, not even in death.
04:43Because sometimes the greatest horrors aren't the ones that arrive uninvited, but the ones you welcome in.
04:54Now gather around and remember, for some, the cold embrace of death is just the beginning.
05:02This tale is aptly titled Gaudete.
05:05Gaudete.
05:19Gaudete.
05:33Look, I know it's not the happiest time, but it's Christmas Eve.
05:56We need to make the best of it.
05:58She wants to be happy.
05:59We're not even unpacked yet.
06:05Like, at all.
06:07All of my shit is still in boxes.
06:10All her stuff is still here.
06:12Everywhere I look, I see her.
06:14I know.
06:15Look, it just...
06:17It didn't feel right getting rid of anything.
06:19It's too soon.
06:21You guys should be happy.
06:25She left us this huge house.
06:27Fresh start.
06:29It's sad what happened to her, but she lived a full life.
06:46We all gotta go sometime.
06:49He's right.
06:51We could have never afforded a house after your dad left.
06:55I mean, we were barely making it before John showed up.
06:57How did John help, exactly?
07:03Grandma left us the house and the money.
07:06Judy, don't be difficult.
07:08Because this is already hard enough.
07:10She's soan's like, what's going on?
07:21She's soan's like, what's going on?
07:22Come on.
07:24The house is soan's like, oh, you guys are good.
07:26I'm soan's like, oh.
07:29I'm soan's like, oh girl.
07:32She's soan's like, oh, I'm soan's like, oh.
07:35Oh my god, yeah.
08:02Why did you leave me here alone with them?
08:18Judy.
08:20Honey.
08:22I'm so sorry.
08:25Look, I know this happening so close to Christmas makes it a hundred times worse.
08:30But I miss her too.
08:32So much.
08:37I can't even believe this is our life now.
08:42I don't like it, Mom.
08:46I don't want to be here with him.
08:49I think it's gross that he's even in this house.
08:52Judy, please.
08:54Try to understand that your dad has been gone a long time.
08:57Would you prefer me just be alone forever?
09:06If this is the alternative, then yeah, I would.
09:10You know what?
09:16Forget it, Mom.
09:19Merry Christmas.
09:19Merry Christmas.
09:20Merry Christmas.
09:21Merry Christmas.
09:22Merry Christmas.
09:23Merry Christmas.
09:24Merry Christmas.
09:25Merry Christmas.
09:26Merry Christmas.
09:27Merry Christmas.
09:28Merry Christmas.
09:29Merry Christmas.
09:30Merry Christmas.
09:31Merry Christmas.
09:32Merry Christmas.
09:33Merry Christmas.
09:34Merry Christmas.
09:35Merry Christmas.
09:36Merry Christmas.
09:37Merry Christmas.
09:38Merry Christmas.
09:39Merry Christmas.
09:40Merry Christmas.
09:41Merry Christmas.
09:42Merry Christmas.
09:43Merry Christmas.
09:44Merry Christmas.
09:45Merry Christmas.
09:46Merry Christmas.
09:47Merry Christmas.
09:48I don't know.
10:18I don't know.
10:48I don't know.
11:18I don't know.
11:48I don't know.
12:18I don't know.
12:48I don't know.
13:18I don't know.
13:48I don't know.
14:18I don't know.
14:48Bon appétit, my little Christmas cadavers.
14:52We're getting a head start on our holiday feast.
14:55Oh, please, spare us the calamitous cuisine.
15:02Honestly, Drac, your foray into food is positively rightful.
15:07Oh, it's beautiful.
15:08It's beautiful.
15:09It's beautiful.
15:10I can still feel it twitching.
15:13How festive.
15:14How festive.
15:21I don't know.
15:22I don't know.
15:24We have a gift.
15:25We have a gift for you.
15:26We have a gift for you.
15:27We have a gift for all of you.
15:28A story about true holiday horror and a most abominable appetite.
15:32A little winter's tale.
15:33A little winter's tale about a beast who doesn't just haunt the mountains, but haunts them.
15:38And remember, the scariest part of the holidays isn't what's hiding under your tree.
15:45It's what's clawing at your door.
15:47We call this one Yeti or not.
15:53Or not.
15:54It's getting closer!
15:55This way!
15:56It's getting closer!
16:21This way!
16:24Come on!
16:24Here!
16:25This way!
16:26Over there!
16:27Come on!
16:28Hurry!
16:29We're trying to get this way!
16:41We've been going at this for hours, okay?
16:43We need to make a decision.
16:44I said it a thousand times.
16:46We kill it, and when the sun comes up,
16:48we try to find our way back to the car.
16:49Plus, look what that fucker did to my arm.
16:51It's an animal.
16:52What do you expect it to do?
16:53Look at it.
16:53It's scared.
16:54It's hurt.
16:54Oh, it's hurt?
16:55It's scared.
16:56It tried to kill us, and it's definitely what took Tara.
16:59No, no, no.
16:59We don't know that for sure, okay?
17:01Yes.
17:01It's the reason why eight people are missing.
17:03We don't know that this is what took those eight people.
17:05My sister was one of those people.
17:07Exactly.
17:07Plus, look at its eyes.
17:09Don't.
17:10Just because we trapped it doesn't mean that you have to be cruel to it.
17:13Guys, look.
17:14The sun will be up any minute.
17:15Let's just leave it in the snare and go get help.
17:17That's the smart thing to do.
17:18Look, look.
17:19It waves at me.
17:20Raven, shut up.
17:21It just moved its arm.
17:23You're crazy.
17:24Don't.
17:25Stop it.
17:25All right, stop.
17:26All right?
17:27We're here for Tara, okay?
17:28And I want to know what happened to her, and I want to know if this thing is the thing
17:30that took her.
17:31It is.
17:32Don't.
17:32Don't fucking touch me.
17:34You're being an asshole.
17:36Jesus Christ.
17:36Raven, fuck.
17:38Zoe, are you okay?
17:39I'm fine.
17:40No, that's it.
17:40I'm done.
17:41I'm fucking done.
17:42This is ridiculous, okay?
17:44I'm going to try to get back to the car one more time.
17:46It's going to be laid out soon.
17:47I probably won't get lost, and hopefully there'll still be a signal there.
17:50But guys, we need to stick together, okay?
17:55For Tara.
17:59Take care of them.
17:59The snares choking it.
18:11Raven, get the fuck away from that thing.
18:13So sorry.
18:15This is supposed to be humane.
18:16Raven, stop.
18:17Stop, stop, stop, stop.
18:19Here.
18:22It's okay.
18:22If it was going to hurt me, it would have already...
18:24You guys...
18:42Shit.
18:44I got completely lost again.
18:46There's no signal for...
18:48I got completely lost again.
19:18What is a five-letter word for blameworthy?
19:45Help is a four-letter word, silly.
19:55I got it.
19:58Shame.
19:59Yep.
20:00That's it.
20:04Aren't you glad I helped you find your sister?
20:06Happy Christmas Day.
20:18Ah, there you are.
20:29I thought you naughty little things had untied yourselves and escaped.
20:35Trust us, don't bother.
20:37It'd be a waste of your time.
20:39You'd either just freeze to death or the hounds would tear you to little delicious bits of men's meat.
20:44So tell me again why I haven't already untied them.
20:50Christmas isn't the only winter holiday.
20:52There is also the horror of New Year's Eve.
20:55A night of resolutions, fresh stars, and ticking clocks that sound just a little bit too much, like a countdown to the end.
21:04A time to remember those we've lost, and sometimes, a time for those lost to remember us.
21:12After all, the dead have nothing but time, and they do love to stay in touch.
21:18The calls from beyond come when you least expect them.
21:23A voice on the line, a whisper in the attic.
21:28A message from the dearly departed who just can't take a hint.
21:34They say dead men tell no tale, but they never mention the dead calling collect.
21:41So tonight, we invite you to ring in the new year with a message from the other side.
21:48Let's raise a glass, my fiendish friends, because our next tale is a little story about goodbyes that come far too late.
21:56We call this one Old Acquaintance.
22:18I can't do this anymore.
22:36Ain't nobody making you stay here.
22:38You want to leave, baby girl?
22:39Leave.
22:40But you walk out that door.
22:41Don't come back!
22:43Daddy, what are you so afraid of?
22:45Get the hell out of my house!
22:46Oh!
22:49It's getting late.
22:51Oh, my God.
23:21I guess it's been a while since you've been back here.
23:28Graduation.
23:30Right.
23:34You know, no one blames you for leaving.
23:39Everyone knows that your father had his demons.
23:51How did my father die?
24:00Violently.
24:04If you don't mind, I'm running late, so...
24:10Oh, and happy new year.
24:19Oh, my God.
24:28Oh, my God.
24:32Oh, my God.
24:38Oh, my God.
24:51Oh, my God.
24:57What the hell?
25:06Oh, my God.
25:25Should all acquaintance be forgotten and ever brought to mine?
25:38Should all acquaintance be forgotten and ever brought to mine?
25:49Oh, my God.
26:02What the hell?
26:04I know you're there, baby girl.
26:07I know you came home.
26:09I'm sorry.
26:11For all of you.
26:12I'm so sorry.
26:14But, my son, tell me you have to find the phone.
26:18You have to do what you couldn't do.
26:20You have to answer the call.
26:22Answer before it finds you, too.
26:25Daddy.
26:26Answer it before it finds you.
26:27Daddy.
26:28Answer it before it finds you.
26:30God.
26:31What the hell?
26:33What the hell?
26:34What the hell?
26:35What is going on?
26:36Ow!
26:37God damn it!
26:38Oh, fuck.
26:39No.
26:40Where is it?
26:45For all things I might be a falling side.
26:52Oh, the queen.
26:54The queen.
26:55The queen.
26:56The queen.
26:57The queen.
26:58The queen.
27:07God damn it.
27:09No.
27:10Wait.
27:11What the?
27:15What the fuck is it?
27:21What the fuck is it?!
27:31You were right.
27:33You were all right.
27:35I have my demons.
27:37It got me.
27:39Now it's gonna get you.
27:51For all my time, my dear.
27:58For all my time.
28:02Shut up, my dear.
28:21Hello?
28:39Maya.
28:41Daddy.
28:43Daddy, I found the phone.
28:45I answered.
28:47I know, baby girl.
28:49But you shouldn't have broken the answering machine.
28:56Now, it's truly free.
29:13Back so soon, my calamitous little carolers.
29:16And scratching at the door for more, I see.
29:20Fear can be a real dopamine rush, can't it?
29:23And sometimes the scariest holiday tales
29:26are filled with merriment and misfortune.
29:30A Christmas tree caught on fire.
29:32The screams of naughty little brats being gobbled up by Krampus.
29:36A yule log to the skull.
29:39These truly are a few of my favorite things.
29:43Well, the holidays are all about family.
29:47And nothing brings people together like fear.
29:52Tonight, we've prepared another holiday tale of our own.
29:55So grab your cocoa, gather round, and don't forget to look up.
30:00You never know who or what might come creeping down
30:05in the dead of night.
30:07We call this one down the chimney and trust us.
30:11The real horror isn't who comes in.
30:14Then, it's who doesn't make it out.
30:44It's the best one.
30:45It's the best one.
30:46It's the best one.
30:47What?
30:48You never know who's going to happen.
30:49We'll try to get it out.
30:51The rendement or the treasures of your own house.
30:54You don't have to get it out.
30:55Now, what are you doing?
30:56Is it that good?
30:57To be like a good movie?
30:58No, I don't like that.
31:01I'm not supposed to be like,
31:02but I have an eye out.
31:03I'm not supposed to be like,
31:05I have to watch out here.
31:06I can't have to be like for the cars.
31:08I can't have to be like,
34:13Uh-oh.
35:15Merry Christmas.
35:24Hey, my name is Merry Christmas.
35:26It's Christmas.
35:28Let's see what Santa got us.
35:29Oh, there's no presents.
35:35No presents.
35:37It was originally passed this year.
35:39Christmas is open!
35:42Christmas is open!
35:43Christmas is open!
35:59Christmas is open!
36:29Christmas is open!
36:59Christmas is open!
37:01Christmas is open!
37:05Christmas is open!
37:13Well, my darlings, it seems we've come to the bitter end of our holiday of horrors.
37:19but yours have hopefully just begun whether it's a fire in your church at midnight mass
37:25where the doors have been conveniently locked or a lonely predator hiding behind your bushes
37:32on christmas eve his breath freezing on the air as he watches or perhaps a slashing salvation
37:41army santa hunting you down through the empty mall parking lot his bell ringing with each
37:48bloody step we have high hopes that this holiday season will be full of horror
37:53wrapped up in a bow stuffed under your tree and designed just for you
37:59thank you all for joining us on this festive fright night we hope our little tails left you warm but
38:08shivering filled with cheer and a little bit of fear so lock your doors dim your lights but don't
38:17bother hanging the mistletoe because the only kisses you'll be getting this year are those
38:22of death so may your christmases be cursed and your new year's eve nightmarish
38:29so
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