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Category
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Previously, Unheated Rivalry.
00:02Shane Hollander, I wanted to introduce myself.
00:04Okay.
00:05The two most talked about prospects in the world.
00:07Canada's Shane Hollander and Russia's Elia Rosanoff.
00:11It was Hollander and Rosanoff, right?
00:13We've seen each other a while.
00:15Yeah, Boston and Montreal play against each other often.
00:17What is your room number?
00:19This is such a bad idea.
00:20You're not going to tell anyone.
00:22There's no one to know.
00:23A lot of kids are going to be looking up to you.
00:25Where's your word, Rosanoff?
00:27My what?
00:28So what's my name going to be?
00:29A dream.
00:32How much pressure do you feel from the fans,
00:34from the hockey world in general?
00:35What was that?
00:36Not everything is about you, Hollander.
00:38What the fuck are you doing in public?
00:40No one is looking.
00:41You don't know that.
00:42Hollander, see you next season.
00:59You're in our way.
01:00You're in our way.
01:01You've gone through that.
01:02You can stay.
01:03You're in our way.
01:04You're in our way.
01:06You're in our way.
01:08You're in our way.
01:09You're in our way.
01:10You think I'm pretty?
01:12You think I'm pretty, you think I'm good.
01:28I'm gonna fuck up with you.
01:31Let's go!
01:42I'm gonna get out soon.
01:44I really hope you're gonna get out soon.
01:48I really hope you're gonna get out soon.
01:52I really hope you're gonna get out soon.
01:55Good job!
01:57Give you an A.
01:59A golden star.
02:01You think you're clever.
02:03Good God!
02:05She took a break.
02:07Made a mistake.
02:09I'm gonna get hit.
02:10You think you're clever.
02:11You think I'm pretty, you think I'm pretty, who's a little baby.
02:17I'll get on the ice for Boston.
02:32I'm gonna do the Boston.
02:34I'm gonna stop playing.
02:37Magic beans, I hope you're gonna get out soon
02:39I really hope you're gonna get out soon
02:43Oh man, I hope you're gonna get out soon
02:47I really hope you're gonna get out soon
02:51I know your heart that might hushed over your phone like
02:59A tree at the top of the hill
03:02It's crooked from doing bad bites
03:06You say you're lost to seek all the power in your life
03:14You're washed up irrelevant
03:18I'm standing in my light
03:21You're standing in my light
03:25You're sta-
03:26You think I'm pretty, you think I'm pretty cool
03:39You say to scare you all
03:40I know those people do
03:42This is the real world, honey
03:45You know, in spite of everything I guess there's just no city tour
03:50Nice try
03:52Now get out the way
03:54Good job
03:56Just take a fucking hand
03:58I said I see ya
03:59Who wanna be ya
04:01Who wanna be ya
04:02Ya, ya, ya, ya, ya
04:03Ya, ya, ya, ya
04:05Hey, if Rosanoff fucks you tonight, I'm gonna fucking back.
04:29I think you mean fucks with, buddy.
04:31I fucking mean what I mean.
04:32You're burning a fake Rosanoff oxide right now.
04:35The fuck does that mean?
04:37They do it to you all the time in Boston.
04:38You want a seat?
04:39No, thanks.
04:40Honestly, guys, it doesn't help me focus.
04:42Yeah, Mitty, go be weird somewhere else.
04:45I'm not even that weird.
04:47Whatever you need, Captain.
04:49Hey, Hollander, can you talk to NBC and some radio outlets in the next time?
04:55Oh, Mr. Hollander, what does Montreal have to do to win tonight?
05:00Well, hockey is a complicated, nuanced game,
05:03but it would be helpful if we scored more fucking goals than the other team.
05:07And how about that other team?
05:10Elia Rosanoff has been on a tear lately.
05:12He had a hat-trick last week,
05:13and he's almost caught up to you in the scoring race.
05:15Want to know what he had to say about that this morning?
05:16No, I'll listen if he actually catches up to me.
05:19Thanks, guys.
05:19Mm-hmm.
05:20Mm-hmm.
05:20Mm-hmm.
05:29Mm-hmm.
05:34Mm-hmm.
07:12You're good.
07:13You're good.
07:14You're good.
07:15You're good.
07:16You're good.
07:17You're good.
07:18You're good.
07:19You're good.
07:20You're good.
07:21You're good.
07:22You're good.
07:23You're good.
07:24You're good.
07:25Get in.
07:26Why the fuck did you think it's okay to sex me before the game?
07:33What the fuck?
07:34You were hard, weren't you?
07:35For how long?
07:36The whole game?
07:37You're such a fucking ass.
07:40You missed me, didn't you?
07:42I fucking didn't.
07:43And I still beat your ass.
07:45Barely.
07:46Oh, barely.
07:53Wow, nice place.
07:55Thanks.
07:56I bought it a couple years ago, but then this year I bought another one right next door.
08:03I eventually might turn it into one place, but for now I'm renting the next door one out.
08:08Mr. Businessman.
08:10Sure.
08:11Mr. Landlord.
08:13You asked.
08:14No, I didn't.
08:29So what do you want me?
08:31In the kitchen?
08:32On the floor?
08:33Fuck you.
08:39Did your mom buy all these pillows?
08:41No.
08:42Have I hired someone?
08:44A designer?
08:47You think there is enough?
08:49Such an asshole.
08:52I think maybe you'll like it.
08:55Smell the cigarettes from here.
08:57I had one.
08:58You shouldn't be smoking.
09:00And you shouldn't be talking.
09:06Come here.
09:07No, you come here.
09:08No, you come here.
09:09No, you come here.
09:12No, you're waiting.
09:13No, you're waiting for your pain.
09:22It's the wound.
09:23It's the wound.
09:24It's the wound.
09:25It's the wound.
09:33Don't worry. It will fit.
09:34Oh, wow, wow, you think this will be enough?
09:36Fuck off.
10:04Where were you?
10:11Please don't go.
10:19Please don't go.
10:26Oh, my God.
10:29Oh, my God.
10:37He's okay.
10:42Oh, shit, Mosley.
10:57Is he okay?
11:07It's you.
11:10It's you.
11:12Okay.
11:14It's you.
11:16It's you.
11:18It's you.
11:20It's you.
11:22It's you.
11:24It's you.
11:28It's you.
11:29It's you.
11:30It's all right.
11:32are you
11:54oh god
11:56I'm cold.
12:22Now the bed's all dead.
12:25What?
12:27Shut up.
12:32I will show it now, okay?
12:55You killed me, Wander. I'm dead.
13:01That was so fucking hot.
13:04We have to wait.
13:08We have to wait.
13:10It's you.
13:14It's you.
13:18It's you.
13:20It's you.
13:22It's you.
13:24I should go.
13:32So, obviously we won't see each other during the Olympics, right?
13:36Oh, right.
13:39Your family must be happy there in Russia.
13:43Yes.
13:45My parents are pretty psyched for me.
13:47They're pissed they can't come, but my mom is starting to wake up at 4am to watch every game.
13:52I bet your parents will be there, right?
13:57My father, yes.
13:59Maybe my brother, but who knows.
14:01Cool.
14:03Anyways, I'm psyched. I've been dreaming about it my whole life.
14:06Dreaming of what?
14:08Bronze medal?
14:10You fucking wish, dude.
14:15Hey, uh, remember when I made you come hands-free?
14:19Don't fuck yourself, Rosnan.
14:22Such a good drink.
14:24Your cab is definitely here.
14:25Bye.
14:46Welcome back to Man in the Crease, your all-star hockey podcast.
14:49For the first period, we are four days into this year's Winter Games,
14:52and there's already a contender for top story here in Sochi, Russia.
14:56What an embarrassing and too promising year for the Russian men's hockey team.
15:01A hard pill to swallow on all mice,
15:04and especially for the young phenom Ilya Rosanoff,
15:07chosen as his country's captain.
15:08He's the country's captain.
15:12Je déboule dans Paris
15:19Piedre qui roule de la cigare à la fournir
15:27Le cœur encore endormi
15:31All in there, what's up, motherfucker?
15:38Boys.
15:40Holy fuck, can you believe Russia?
15:41Be nice, Bonnie.
15:42At least they fucking lost Latvia.
15:44Did you see that game?
15:45Yeah, it was a straight-up shit show.
15:46A debacle.
15:48Hey, what did Ross say about it?
15:50Uh, I don't know.
15:51Nothing to me.
15:52That's for sure.
15:53I think he knows Canada has this in the bag.
15:55Uh-uh.
15:56It's USA this year, baby. We're fucking coming for you.
15:57Okay.
15:58Trust me.
15:59Gravani, don't even stress.
16:00Oh, good one.
16:01Yeah.
16:04Does your room have that smell?
16:06Yes. Yes, it does.
16:08Is it black mold?
16:09Because that's what JJ thinks it is.
16:10Yeah.
16:11He's probably right.
16:12The good news is, we're not going to be here alone.
16:13All right, so tonight we can do the men's short-form figure skating.
16:16My buddy Joe is in that program.
16:17We train together.
16:18Would you guys be cool to do that?
16:20I'd love to show up for him.
16:21Hell yeah, man.
16:23Show up for any dude who's that brave.
16:26What do you mean?
16:28Well, I'm assuming your buddy might be gay.
16:32I mean, fucking pray for a dude to show up to a place like this and be like,
16:36Hey, here's me.
16:37Russia is not safe for folks like that.
16:40Fucking balls of steel, man.
16:42You just feel good, man.
16:43You're so little, man.
16:44There's a night to go.
16:45I love to show up.
16:46You're such a girl.
16:47You're such a girl.
16:52I love to show up.
16:53You're so little, man.
16:55You're such a girl.
16:56Man, your buddy fucking killed it.
17:16Yeah, he did.
17:20I'm just going to find the bathroom.
17:26Hey.
17:46I'm not here.
17:47No, I'm not.
17:50I saw you up here.
17:51I wanted to see how you're doing.
17:52Fine.
17:54Go sit down.
17:56We are not anything.
18:01Go away, Holander.
18:09Are you okay?
18:11Please, go.
18:14You didn't answer my text.
18:17No, I did not answer your boring text.
18:19Now you go.
18:22Fine.
18:23Fuck.
18:26I'll have to meet you.
18:27I'll have to meet you.
18:28Yes.
18:28I'll have to meet you.
18:37You need to meet you.
18:39Yes, my dear.
18:39The minister still wants to meet you tonight, regardless of what you want.
18:47This is my honor.
18:49You must be proud of my honor.
18:52After yesterday, you won't win...
18:57...Latwia.
18:59...Latwia.
19:01And he's still drinking.
19:03How did you do this before?
19:05It's not sad?
19:06It's not sad, dear.
19:07Well, it's not so bad.
19:09They don't teach you discipline in this American League.
19:12It's not a game, it's a shame.
19:14It's a real shame.
19:16It's not to prove the hopes you showed up in childhood.
19:19I'm playing better than when I was born.
19:22Our teammates are injured.
19:24The team isn't playing.
19:26What's playing?
19:27What's that for American absurdity?
19:29What's playing?
19:31You're a captain, you're doing them playing.
19:34You're always looking for someone who's guilty.
19:36From childhood.
19:41Who's that you've got to do?
19:46Your mother?
19:47She's not able to do this.
19:53No, my father.
19:55Mom, you're dead.
19:56Mom, you're dead.
19:57Mom, you're dead.
19:58Mom, you're dead.
19:59Mom, you're dead.
20:00You remember her?
20:01I was in your case.
20:02I was in your case.
20:03Where's Polina?
20:04Where's Polina?
20:05In Moscow?
20:06Of course.
20:07Of course.
20:09You're dead.
20:10In Moscow?
20:12Of course.
20:18We need to go to party,
20:20in the night.
20:24To be able to meet the minister.
20:28Yes.
20:29You ready?
20:30Go.
20:31Okay.
20:32Of course, I'm always the same.
20:35I'm always the same.
20:37I'm always the same.
20:39But what did you do?
20:40He didn't have any form.
20:42I want him to stay.
20:44He needs to go out.
20:46He needs to be in America.
20:48He needs to be good.
20:50He's too good for us.
20:52It's a problem with leadership.
20:56It's always a problem.
20:58Leadership.
21:00You're too much talking about.
21:04You're too much talking about.
21:07You're my angel.
21:09You're too much talking about.
21:11Especially when it's about hockey.
21:13Only when we're winning, Dad.
21:16I'm going to go to a bar.
21:18He needs to be one cup.
21:20Look how she's behind you.
21:24From the childhood.
21:27I'm an angel.
21:28It would be nice if I had to remember it.
21:30I want to drink.
21:32I don't know.
21:33I have something interesting.
21:35I don't know.
21:37Are you ready?
21:38You're.
21:39Are you ready?
21:40Are you ready?
21:41Are you ready?
21:42I'm ready.
21:43I'm ready.
21:44Are you ready?
21:45I'm ready.
21:46Are you ready?
21:47I'm ready.
21:48I'm ready for you.
21:49Have a good evening.
21:50It's been a long time ago, Ilya.
21:57It's been a long time, Sasha.
22:04I think you've played well.
22:06I'd like to say thank you, but I know that you didn't watch any other games.
22:10For those who've been a whole life son of a coach for hockey,
22:13you're trying to avoid this.
22:15It's been a long time for me.
22:17I often call my name.
22:19When I say that, I call my name.
22:22In any case, it doesn't matter for you.
22:25It doesn't matter?
22:26Why did you do that?
22:28My father...
22:29Your father is a fool, who will ever kill you.
22:32You need to stop worrying about what he thinks.
22:36And don't worry about these crazy games,
22:38when you have a real chance for the Cup in this year.
22:41Is it true?
22:42Yes, it is true.
22:43Hunter and Admiral are not going through New Jersey.
22:46New Jersey is not going through Holland and Montreal.
22:50I think you'll be able to win this year in Montreal.
22:52In this year?
22:53Yes, in this year.
22:55Because I think he's traumatized.
23:00Where do you know everything?
23:01On the extra sense.
23:03With a traumatized brother, you're not going to leave.
23:06Like you've done with the team.
23:08It's pretty bad.
23:10Look at that.
23:11It's going to be in the next year.
23:13There's a little future.
23:14You'll be able to win it.
23:15You'll win it whoever for the SUBSCRIBE.
23:16You'll win it.
23:17I'll go back to Chicago.
23:18In Chicago, not so long.
23:20In the final final, you'll be in San Francisco.
23:23They're good.
23:24But too young.
23:27So you won't win it.
23:29for a year earlier than I was talking about with my father.
23:36Thank you, I'm going to sleep.
23:38Tomorrow you'll need to be perfect.
23:41You'll always be perfect.
23:43You'll need to be perfect.
23:48We'll see you later.
23:51See you later.
23:57Well, what?
23:59It's like Paris, Sasha.
24:03Wow. It's cool.
24:06I just love this place.
24:09Clubs? It's my head.
24:13Boys. It's just nice.
24:16And boys?
24:19Well, you've seen French boys.
24:24Yeah, Ilya?
24:29Oh, God.
24:34I'm not just a joke.
24:37You're not lying.
24:41You're not lying,
24:43you're not flirting with a answer.
24:50You were happy to have fun.
24:55You remember?
24:59This? Seriously?
25:01This is dangerous.
25:02It was just a threat to you. If you remember, don't you?
25:06We're already dead, Sash.
25:08Yes.
25:10It's true.
25:12You're dead.
25:14Yes.
25:16Yes.
25:18You're dead.
25:20We're already dead, Sash.
25:22Yes.
25:24Yes.
25:26Yeah.
25:28It's true.
25:33Let's go.
25:35Okay.
25:36Let's go.
25:37Let's go.
25:40No.
25:50Okay.
25:52I'll find a wedding.
25:55Okay.
26:04I'll be glad to see you.
26:07I'm glad to see you.
26:21Okay.
26:24Captain's here.
26:26Yeah!
26:27Yeah!
26:28Yeah!
26:29Yeah!
26:30Yeah!
26:31What am I supposed to do?
26:32I don't know. My mom told me to get away.
26:33Oh, my God.
26:35You said you could have your own wedding.
26:37There's ginger ale on the pitch.
26:38Okay, playoffs are over. You cannot keep the beer.
26:40That's not a rule. You just make that up.
26:42Hollander, is that a rule?
26:43Unfortunately, it is.
26:45Fuck you, Hollander.
26:46You can barely even grow one.
26:47No, no. Fuck you, Swedish inbred.
26:49Fuck you, AJ.
26:50Just fucking do it, Hayden.
26:52Stop it.
26:54Boys, it's starting.
26:56Turn it up.
26:57It's game six and the cup is somewhere inside as we speak.
27:00You know that Ilya Rosanoff wants this bad.
27:03Rosanoff and the Raiders have been on fire since the Olympic break.
27:06A heartbreaking game for the Russians seems to have only intensified the young Boston captain.
27:10Ooh.
27:11He's on a chair, scoring ten goals over the past six playoff games.
27:15Okay, listen the fuck up.
27:18Look.
27:20I don't give a fuck how many goals I've scored.
27:23I don't give a fuck how I played two fucking nights ago.
27:26I don't need to think about that.
27:27That was yesterday.
27:28That was before.
27:30Now, I only need one thing.
27:35I need to win.
27:38Here.
27:39At home.
27:40Tonight.
27:43As much fun as it would have been to go to California and humiliate them there.
27:46But I want to hear our fans.
27:49I want to hear them scream.
27:52I want to fuck San Francisco.
27:56I know you can do it.
27:58I've seen you fucking do it.
27:59I've seen every one of you do it.
28:02So leave it all the fuck out there tonight.
28:06Because this is our fucking night.
28:11This is our fucking cup.
28:14Fucking fuck San Francisco.
28:16I can't believe that asshole is about to win the cup.
28:32Shane hates him the most.
28:34What?
28:35You hate Rosanoff.
28:36Of course.
28:37But.
28:38He's very good at hockey.
28:40The best probably.
28:41Eh, nah.
28:42You're the fucking best, Orlando.
28:44Yeah.
28:45Not that animal shit show cock sucking Russian.
28:47Now that is that.
28:49The Boston Raiders are your MLH champions.
28:54What a comeback story this year from Ilya Rosanoff.
28:57The captain did absolutely everything in these playoffs.
29:00Leading his team in block shots.
29:02In shots it ends.
29:03And obviously, it comes off.
29:07Catching that LeBron!
29:09I'm literally hungry as fuck.
29:33Well, nice watch.
29:34They gave this to you for free or what?
29:35Where the fuck were you, Ron?
29:36Five seconds.
29:37Yeah, 25 seconds.
29:38What were you even doing?
29:39And now, presenting the Lord Tower Award.
29:40I was busy.
29:41It was who?
29:42Ilya Rosanoff and Shane Hallmark.
29:44But the most important thing.
29:47Is the friends we have.
29:48Ilya Rosanoff and Shane Hallmark.
29:51But the most important thing.
29:53Is the friends we have.
29:54Ilya Rosanoff and Shane Hallmark.
29:56But the most important thing.
30:01Is the friends we have.
30:02Is the friends we make along the way.
30:06Hey.
30:07Before we give out next award.
30:09Can I get a selfie with you?
30:11What?
30:12Come on.
30:13When will this ever happen again, buddy?
30:15Okay, fine.
30:16But hurry up.
30:24Great.
30:25Give me your number.
30:26I'll text them to you.
30:27No chance.
30:29I'll text them to you.
30:30I'll text them to you.
30:31If you're a fan.
30:32I'll text them to you.
30:33No chance.
30:34No chance.
30:35And the...
30:36I'll text them to you.
30:37The Lord's Allen Award for most sportsmanlike player goes to...
31:09Well...
31:16What?
31:19What the fuck do you want, Rosanoff?
31:22You haven't answered a text from me in, like, six months.
31:26You won't even acknowledge I exist unless there's a fucking camera pointed at us,
31:29and then it's for some fucking clown show.
31:32So, yeah, what the fuck do you actually want from me?
31:37Well?
31:39I want you to suck my dick.
31:43Oh, fuck you. You are unbelievable.
31:45You suck my dick.
31:46Maybe as nicely.
32:02You're weak.
32:05Yes?
32:09Please.
32:14If you want me to get on my knees on this filthy bathroom floor and suck your dick,
32:19you will have to ask nicer than that.
32:20Please get on your knees
32:26On this filthy bathroom floor
32:29And suck my dick
32:31Please
32:34No
32:45What?
32:50No
32:53We'll go back to our seats
32:55Watch the rest of this boring show
32:57And then go to boring party after
33:01And then, when you might have been waiting all night
33:05You'll come back to my hotel room
33:07And I will maybe
33:10Maybe
33:11Do more than just suck your dick
33:15When did your English get so good?
33:19I read the New Yorker now
33:21Really?
33:24No
33:24The New Yorker is boring
33:25My dad loves it
33:29Ah
33:31So being boring is genetic
33:34Genetic
33:37Let's make a deal
33:43If you win MVP tonight, I will blow you, fuck you, whatever you want
33:49And if you win
33:53And if you win
33:53Good luck to me
34:12It's just like
34:26I'm in this position
34:30And I'll hide up
34:33Um, especially since you're in the last game.
34:36I'll show you the last one.
34:37See you.
34:38See you.
34:38See you.
34:38See you.
34:58Congratulations.
35:01Now take off your clothes.
35:03You're such an asshole.
35:33What?
35:37What?
35:53Just a lot of windows.
36:07Good.
36:18Now get on the bed.
36:26This is a good hotel.
36:28Very nice vodka.
36:30It's hard to find in America.
36:32Okay.
36:36Touch yourself.
36:37What?
36:38Show up for me.
36:39I want to watch you.
36:40You what?
36:41It's my special day, Hollander.
36:43I want to watch.
36:44I've never...
36:46No shit.
36:47Fuck you.
36:49Give me some vodka, at least.
36:50No, no, no.
36:52Vodka is for after.
36:53It's your reward.
36:53It's not something.
36:56You're nothing.
36:57You're lucky.
36:58Try it.
36:58You'll be working.
37:00You owe me one really.
37:00Just as close as I put it to the side of the side.
37:02You'll be on fire.
37:03Quit asking.
37:04You're missing.
37:04I can't wait.
37:06You're missing.
37:07Be careful.
37:07You're missing you.
37:08I'm missing you.
37:10I have to be honest with you!
37:10I'm missing you.
37:11It's not fair enough.
37:12I love to be honest with you.
37:13I know what's the difference.
37:14It's a good story.
37:15You're missing.
37:16It's a good story.
37:16There's a good story.
37:18It's not so iniciat Vere God.
37:19You're missing you.
37:20do you want to know how it feels
37:31how it feels
37:33holding the cup
37:36you fucking asshole
37:38I can barely describe it
37:40oh my god Hollander
37:50fuck
37:55are you gonna fuck me?
38:06we will see
38:07I need
38:11what?
38:14you know
38:15tell me
38:16you
38:20I need you
38:26I need you
39:24So Russia this year was something else.
39:34It's intense there.
39:41So are you heading back soon?
39:44Back.
39:46To Russia for the summer?
39:49Oh, yes.
39:54What do you mean, why?
40:02Do you have to?
40:05There is no have to.
40:06It's home.
40:10Yeah, but I don't know.
40:13Is it safe?
40:15What do you mean, safe?
40:17I don't know.
40:21Do you even like it there?
40:30What difference does it make?
40:32A pretty big one, I think.
40:34I need to sleep.
40:43Oh.
40:45Yeah, me too.
40:46I should have.
40:47So, uh, I'm off.
41:00Goodbye, Hollander.
41:00I'm gone.
41:01Goodbye, Hollander.
41:08Goodbye, Hollander.
41:11Goodbye, Hollander.
41:13Goodbye, Hollander.
41:14Let's go.
41:44Let's go.
42:14Let's go.
42:44Let's go.
43:14Let's go.
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