- 14 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Did you know that you can get married here?
00:00:27In this whole place?
00:00:28Mm-hmm.
00:00:28It's a bit haunted.
00:00:31What?
00:00:31No, it doesn't.
00:00:34I actually think it's quite romantic.
00:00:37Romantic?
00:00:38Mm-hmm.
00:00:39What happens to getting married in a church?
00:00:41Oh, churches are for boring people.
00:00:44Hey, you know I'm not boring.
00:00:47Hey, stop.
00:00:50Stop.
00:00:51Don't think you can just ply me with wine and then get what you want.
00:00:54Why not?
00:00:56It usually works.
00:00:57Maybe.
00:00:59But you promised me a massage.
00:01:01And I will.
00:01:03Later.
00:01:04Later.
00:01:05That's what you always say and then you just conveniently forget.
00:01:09But I forgot my oil.
00:01:10Well, I've got some.
00:01:14Of course you have.
00:01:16What was that?
00:01:19What was what?
00:01:20I heard something.
00:01:23It's probably just a fox.
00:01:25Do you think it could be like one of them big wild cats?
00:01:27No, that was like a growl.
00:01:30Do you think it could be like one of them big wild cats?
00:01:34Babe, there are not big wild cats around here.
00:01:39It's probably just a badger.
00:01:40A badger.
00:01:43Yes.
00:01:43A badger.
00:01:46Yes.
00:01:46A badger.
00:01:47A badger.
00:01:47Ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:02:17Ha, ha, ha.
00:02:47Ha, ha, ha.
00:03:17Ha, ha, ha.
00:03:47Mike, please, you're scaring me now.
00:04:03Stop it.
00:04:08Mike!
00:04:09Mike?
00:04:35Mike?
00:04:36Mike?
00:04:37Mike?
00:04:39Mike?
00:04:41Mike?
00:04:45Mike?
00:04:47Mike?
00:04:51Mike?
00:04:53Mike?
00:04:55Ah!
00:04:56Ah!
00:05:25Oh, hi there. You must be Dylan.
00:05:31Yeah, hi.
00:05:32Welcome to Cedar Manor.
00:05:34Thank you. Sorry I'm a bit late.
00:05:36No problemo. I was starting to think that the wedding was cancelled.
00:05:39No, no. I just got held up at Heathrow and my flight was delayed.
00:05:42Oh, been anywhere nice?
00:05:43China.
00:05:44Oh, because that's our pleasure.
00:05:45Business. I work for an anti-poaching organization.
00:05:48Oh, wow. Well, let me show you around.
00:05:55So, I take it you haven't been here before?
00:06:01No.
00:06:02So, we cater for weddings of all different sizes.
00:06:05We have extensive grounds and buildings available as you can see.
00:06:10We have the hot tub, sauna, and a pool.
00:06:15And then this gazebo right here where most people get married.
00:06:19Sounds ideal.
00:06:20Well, tell me more about this anti-poaching work. I'm intrigued.
00:06:24It's mainly educational.
00:06:26Spreading word about her killing animals is wrong.
00:06:29But, there's always some idiots that think her ground up wine at home will give them a hard-on.
00:06:34This is silly, isn't it?
00:06:36So, are you ever out there in Africa in the thick of that?
00:06:40No, no. I quit that a while back.
00:06:43Oh, um...
00:06:45My wife...
00:06:47She was targeted by poachers.
00:06:49Since that incident, I've took a step back from range of work.
00:06:56I'm so sorry to hear that.
00:06:58These things happen.
00:07:00I can't imagine how can anyone get over something like that.
00:07:04Babe.
00:07:05I'm coming in from Cairns.
00:07:06You're at the venue.
00:07:07It's great.
00:07:08They're very accommodating.
00:07:09Yeah, you're gonna love it.
00:07:10It's gonna be perfect.
00:07:11Thanks.
00:07:12Thanks.
00:07:13Thanks.
00:07:14Thanks.
00:07:15Thanks.
00:07:16Thanks.
00:07:17Thanks.
00:07:18Thanks.
00:07:19Thanks.
00:07:20Thanks.
00:07:21Bye.
00:07:22Bye.
00:07:23Bye.
00:07:32Bye.
00:07:48Very nice.
00:07:49It has a certain charm.
00:07:53A hidden charm.
00:08:03Hmm. Rustic.
00:08:05A tad bougie.
00:08:09Quite elegant. Well, I can see what they're trying to do.
00:08:19Back to the foreposter bed. What? No, that's my room, bitch.
00:08:27Ooh, very nice.
00:08:31Regal. Boutique. Functional.
00:08:35Oi. And are you going to be consummating your marriage in here in 24 hours time?
00:08:41I'll consummate your arse in a minute.
00:08:45Who are you calling? I'm trying to get hold of my dad.
00:08:48But there is no bloody reception.
00:08:52Running late again?
00:08:54Yup.
00:08:56You'd think he'd want to be on time for his only daughter's wedding, but...
00:09:00Oh, chill. He's probably stuck in traffic.
00:09:02Hmm. Yeah.
00:09:12There you go!
00:09:14Hi!
00:09:16Hi.
00:09:18Hi.
00:09:20Hi.
00:09:22Right, dump your bags. We are having a copper.
00:09:24Just what the doctor ordered.
00:09:26I could use something stronger.
00:09:28That bad, was it?
00:09:30Speaking of which, the boys should be right behind you.
00:09:34So, come on.
00:09:40Oh, this is nice. The boss is actually making us tea for a change.
00:09:44Oh, less of your tea.
00:09:46Uh, where's Lisa?
00:09:48She's still trying to get Wi-Fi.
00:09:50Well, this place is pretty cool.
00:09:52Amy, did you say you've been here before?
00:09:54Yeah, I told Lisa about this place, because I've been here before with my ex.
00:09:56Nice.
00:09:58Did you have a good time?
00:10:00Maybe she wrecks.
00:10:02Well, we certainly made use of the hot tub.
00:10:04Yes, Amy.
00:10:06Naughty girl.
00:10:08It hasn't been intense. I'm not going in.
00:10:10Did anyone hear the story about this place?
00:10:14Oh, yeah. No.
00:10:15No?
00:10:16What story?
00:10:17Well, about a year or so ago, two locals went missing.
00:10:26The police found the remains of a party in a torn-up tent down at the end of the grounds.
00:10:32But no bodies.
00:10:34What?
00:10:35No way.
00:10:36Don't be telling me that. I'll never get any sleep.
00:10:37Oh, babe. You're sharing a room with me. You're not getting any sleep anyway.
00:10:41Kinky.
00:10:42Oh, my God. And they never found them?
00:10:45No.
00:10:46And they don't know what happened.
00:10:48So the bodies could still be in the grounds somewhere?
00:10:50Oh, shit. Or in the cellar.
00:10:52Oh, please don't tell me this place has a cellar.
00:10:54There might be.
00:10:55Oh, great choice of location. There's nothing more bodies in the cellar.
00:10:58Shh.
00:10:59Do they have bodies? Where?
00:11:01Oh, we were just discussing a horror film. And how'd you get on with the Wi-Fi?
00:11:06No, it's still not connecting.
00:11:09I mean, I out-blood the router, I reset the whole thing, and nothing is working.
00:11:15Why do you need Wi-Fi? You've got alls to entertain you.
00:11:19It's not that. It's just, I wanted to livestream the wedding.
00:11:23And, uh, I would use my phone, but the reception is crap, and I was promised that there would be Wi-Fi, but nothing seems to be working.
00:11:32And, you know, there are people who aren't going to be here, like my grandparents.
00:11:36And I just, they're all expecting a livestream from me, and...
00:11:40Hey, it'll be all right. We'll get it fixed. And if not, it's still being videoed, isn't it?
00:11:46The most important thing is that you and Charlie are getting married tomorrow.
00:11:51That is definitely going to happen. It's your day. It's all about you and Charlie, boy.
00:11:57But mostly you.
00:12:00It's a little snake of the devil.
00:12:02Ladies!
00:12:04Hello, wifey.
00:12:06Not quite yet.
00:12:08Is everything all right?
00:12:09Wi-Fi is down.
00:12:11Oh, shit.
00:12:13Okay, well, Ben could take a look at it, right?
00:12:15Yeah, probably, yeah.
00:12:16All right, Kushti. So, shall we get this party started?
00:12:19Woo-hoo!
00:12:20Yes!
00:12:21Woo-hoo!
00:12:22Line them up!
00:12:24Oh, careful!
00:12:27Oh, don't worry. It won't stain.
00:12:29I think she was more worried about you wasting it.
00:12:32Don't worry. There is plenty more where this came from. Wifey?
00:12:36Well, no. I am not really drinking. And, uh, where should you be?
00:12:40I don't want you looking all hungover tomorrow.
00:12:43Oh, what are you trying to say?
00:12:45Ben, you are in charge of making sure he doesn't overdo it tonight, please.
00:12:49Yes, Mom.
00:12:50Are you drinking this, then?
00:12:53Absolutely.
00:12:54Okay.
00:12:55Fill her up.
00:12:56All right, come on.
00:12:57Don't be shy.
00:12:58I'm not being shy.
00:12:59Come on.
00:13:00Yeah? More?
00:13:01Oh, no!
00:13:02Chin chin, Benjamin.
00:13:05Ladies, and this Muppet, I'd like to thank you all for coming to watch me marry this absolute beauty.
00:13:16Here's to an unforgettable wedding.
00:13:19Woo!
00:13:20Cheers!
00:13:21Cheers!
00:13:25Yes, with the palm trees.
00:13:27With the cocktails, those really good cocktails.
00:13:29What was that guy's name?
00:13:30The, the...
00:13:31The umbrellas and...
00:13:32It was like Quino's.
00:13:33That's my dad.
00:13:34My dad.
00:13:35Okay.
00:13:36And what time do you call this?
00:13:49I'm sorry babe.
00:13:51Mmm.
00:13:52You know how it is.
00:13:55Work commitments.
00:13:56It's the best way for you.
00:13:59Come on.
00:14:00Best way.
00:14:01I'm afraid you're stuck with a single room.
00:14:10Although, I'm not sure you're gonna fit in this bed.
00:14:14Don't worry.
00:14:16Reminds me of the ranger days.
00:14:18The teeny tiny camp beds.
00:14:20Can't believe my little girl's getting married.
00:14:33I'm not a little girl anymore.
00:14:35I am all grown up with a job and everything.
00:14:38You call it a job.
00:14:39But we both know.
00:14:40Fashion isn't a real job.
00:14:41Fashion isn't a real job.
00:14:42Don't let Vanessa hear you say that.
00:14:43She'll probably slap you.
00:14:44To be honest.
00:14:45I think you'd come off second best.
00:14:46Sounds horrible.
00:14:47Oh, damn.
00:14:48No, I think you two would actually get on really well.
00:14:49I don't know.
00:14:50Maybe it's time to, er...
00:14:51Lisa.
00:14:52Dad.
00:14:53Come on.
00:14:54It's been a long time since...
00:15:12I just wanna see you happy again.
00:15:14I know.
00:15:15I know, Yas.
00:15:16That reminds me.
00:15:18I've got something for you.
00:15:20I believe the traditional wine girl was something old.
00:15:27I got this for your mum, Maria in Africa.
00:15:32And I want you to have it.
00:15:41No, don't get emotional.
00:15:43You go join the party.
00:15:46I'll be down in a sec.
00:15:50Hi, I'm Vanessa.
00:16:08Dylan, we...
00:16:10We met before, didn't we?
00:16:13Yeah, the, um...
00:16:15The Christmas party at the Sky Garden.
00:16:19Ah, yes.
00:16:21A little glitzy for my taste.
00:16:24Yes, I remember you saying that you didn't really do fashion.
00:16:30Hmm.
00:16:31Well, you certainly know how to pick out a shirt.
00:16:35That's saying something.
00:16:37Well, it is just a shirt and trousers.
00:16:41I can't really get that long.
00:16:44You'd be surprised.
00:16:48Can I get you a drink?
00:16:50Absolutely.
00:16:52I see, uh, you two are getting reacquainted.
00:16:58Vanessa's just giving me some fashion tips.
00:17:01Oh, well, I've been trying to do that for years.
00:17:04Uh, but it sounds like you're having a lot more success than I ever did.
00:17:08So, um, I'll leave you guys do it.
00:17:10Hi!
00:17:11Hi!
00:17:12Hi!
00:17:13Hi!
00:17:14Hi!
00:17:15Hi!
00:17:16Hi!
00:17:17Hi!
00:17:18Hi!
00:17:19Hi!
00:17:20Hi!
00:17:21Hi!
00:17:22Hi!
00:17:23I'm gonna go to bed tomorrow.
00:17:24Okay, honey.
00:17:25Don't stay up too late.
00:17:26Oh!
00:17:27Oh!
00:17:28Oh!
00:17:29Oh!
00:17:30Oh!
00:17:31What do you think I'm doing?
00:17:32Oh!
00:17:33Oh!
00:17:34Oh!
00:17:35Oh!
00:17:36Oh!
00:17:37Oh!
00:17:38Oh!
00:17:39Oh!
00:17:40Oh!
00:17:41Oh!
00:17:42Oh!
00:17:43Oh!
00:17:44Oh!
00:17:45Oh!
00:17:46I am gonna go to bed tomorrow.
00:17:49Okay, honey.
00:17:51Don't stay up too late.
00:17:54I thought we were gonna wait until we were married for you to start nagging.
00:17:59Yeah, well, I am just practicing.
00:18:02Alright.
00:18:03Goodnight, everyone.
00:18:04Bye!
00:18:05Bye!
00:18:10Hey.
00:18:11How's it going?
00:18:13How about you and me walk around the grounds?
00:18:18Oh, um, I'm really quite tired, so...
00:18:22You know, go catch and see this.
00:18:24Really?
00:18:25Yeah.
00:18:26Well, maybe tomorrow then.
00:18:32Don't worry about it, mate.
00:18:34She'll be up for it tomorrow.
00:18:35Bride maids are always gagging for it on the day.
00:18:37Okay?
00:18:38Yeah.
00:18:39So, chin up.
00:18:40Go get some rest.
00:18:41I'll clean up here, okay?
00:18:42Alright.
00:18:43Hi there.
00:18:44Hi.
00:18:45So, you've been making eyes at me all night.
00:18:58Thought there was something on my face.
00:19:00Could be if you wanted to.
00:19:02Oh, yeah?
00:19:05Such as?
00:19:10You see, I think...
00:19:12It's just about it, eh?
00:19:13I'll show you.
00:19:18My heart is saying no.
00:19:20Mm-hmm.
00:19:21But your dick's saying yes.
00:19:25Your dick always says yes.
00:19:27Come on.
00:19:29She's not married yet.
00:19:30Yeah.
00:19:33True.
00:19:37I know it's...
00:19:41Well, it might end before then.
00:19:46Come on.
00:19:47Come on.
00:19:48Come on.
00:19:49I'll tell you what, Georgie.
00:19:50You better get anything else to my dad.
00:19:51Oh, my God.
00:19:52Is there a dick yet?
00:19:53I know it's nice.
00:19:54What are you on about?
00:19:55Is there a dick?
00:19:56Oh, Georgie, it's a...
00:19:57Come on.
00:19:58Don't complain.
00:19:59It's so nice.
00:20:00You're like this, right?
00:20:01Yeah.
00:20:02Mm-hmm.
00:20:03Mm-hmm.
00:20:04Mm-hmm.
00:20:05Mm-hmm.
00:20:06Mm-hmm.
00:20:07Mm-hmm.
00:20:08Mm-hmm.
00:20:09It's so nice.
00:20:10It's so nice.
00:20:11You're like this, right?
00:20:13Mm-hmm.
00:20:14Mm-hmm.
00:20:15Mm-hmm.
00:20:16Mm-hmm.
00:20:18Mm-hmm.
00:20:19Mm-hmm.
00:20:20Mm-hmm.
00:20:21Mm-hmm.
00:20:22We shouldn't be doing this.
00:20:23It's all right.
00:20:24Go on.
00:20:25You wanted them.
00:20:26Get the target.
00:20:27Fucking target.
00:20:28Ah!
00:20:29Ah!
00:20:30Ah!
00:20:31Ah!
00:20:32Ah!
00:20:33Ah!
00:20:34Ah!
00:20:35Ah!
00:20:36Ah!
00:20:37Ah!
00:20:38Ah!
00:20:39Ah!
00:20:40Ah!
00:20:41Ah!
00:20:42Ah!
00:20:43Ah!
00:20:44Ah!
00:20:45Ah!
00:20:46Ah!
00:20:47Ah!
00:20:48Ah!
00:20:49Ah!
00:20:50Ah!
00:20:51Ah!
00:20:52Ah!
00:20:53Ah!
00:20:54Ah!
00:20:55Ah!
00:20:56Ah!
00:20:57Ah!
00:20:58Ah!
00:20:59Ah!
00:21:00Ah!
00:21:01Ah!
00:21:02Ah!
00:21:03Ah!
00:21:04Ah!
00:21:05Ah!
00:21:06Ah!
00:21:07Ah!
00:21:08Ah!
00:21:09Ah!
00:21:10Ah!
00:21:11Ah!
00:21:12Ah!
00:21:13Ah!
00:21:14Ah!
00:21:15Ah!
00:21:16Ah!
00:21:17Ah!
00:21:18Ah!
00:21:19Ah!
00:21:20I don't know.
00:21:50All set for the big day?
00:22:12Yeah.
00:22:13You?
00:22:14Yeah.
00:22:15Darn it.
00:22:23Yes, sir.
00:22:25Where'd you go, mate?
00:22:46Uh, just for a wonder.
00:22:53You didn't see Georgie, did you, on your travels?
00:23:00She, she wasn't in her room.
00:23:01No.
00:23:02I think she's plain hard to get.
00:23:03Event?
00:23:04Yeah.
00:23:05Nothing.
00:23:06Good night.
00:23:07Good night.
00:23:08Good night.
00:23:15Good night.
00:23:23Morning, Bridie.
00:23:25Morning.
00:23:27You're getting married today.
00:23:30Stop. It's not normal to have this much energy in the morning.
00:23:34Plant-based diet. I keep telling you.
00:23:37No way. I'm not giving up my meat. Bacon.
00:23:41Speaking of, can I bring you some breakfast?
00:23:44Mmm. Oh, no. No, I don't want to be blunted.
00:23:48Okay, but at least eat something. Nobody wants a dead bride.
00:23:52Mmm.
00:23:54Please for bacon. Oh, please.
00:23:56Oh, amazing.
00:23:58We seem to be missing the bride.
00:24:00Oh, she's just staying in the room until the big moment.
00:24:02We don't want to see in the groom. It's bad luck.
00:24:04What about the groom?
00:24:06Are we still in bed, Penny, Bacon, Sonny?
00:24:08Is there anything to hold you?
00:24:10Probably still trying to avoid Ben.
00:24:12What? Nothing.
00:24:14She's staying in your room, isn't she?
00:24:16Well, I thought so, but she wasn't there before I went to sleep.
00:24:18Oh, weird. Oh, my God. She thinks she's with Dylan.
00:24:20No.
00:24:22Well, I didn't think he was her type, is he?
00:24:24Well, that settles it.
00:24:26Settles what?
00:24:27Oh, unless she was with Amy.
00:24:29Who? Was Georgie staying in your room?
00:24:31Um, no.
00:24:32Must be Dylan, then.
00:24:35Dylan?
00:24:36You're doing Lisa's hair and make-up, aren't you?
00:24:38Yeah.
00:24:39When you go up, take that with you.
00:24:40Try to get her to eat Elise's son.
00:24:42Yeah, sure thing.
00:24:44All right, ladies.
00:24:45I'm going to say this to the groom.
00:24:47See you at the wedding.
00:24:48Bye.
00:24:49Bye.
00:24:52You haven't got a napkin?
00:24:54Bye.
00:24:56Brekkies.
00:25:00Cheers.
00:25:06You all right, mate?
00:25:08You... are you a bit nervous?
00:25:15I have to tell you.
00:25:18It does not leave this room.
00:25:21All right.
00:25:22Yeah, that's what best men are for.
00:25:28Last night.
00:25:29Yeah.
00:25:30I was with Georgie.
00:25:32Oh.
00:25:35I'm sorry, mate.
00:25:36We go way back and, you know, we've always been fond.
00:25:42Each other.
00:25:44Right.
00:25:45It's not the end of the world.
00:25:47And...
00:25:49You've been dead and you get on to me now, so...
00:25:53Yeah.
00:25:55No, that...
00:25:57That's not it.
00:25:58No?
00:26:00While we were at it,
00:26:03we were attacked.
00:26:05Attacked?
00:26:07This is gonna sound insane.
00:26:14By a giant crocodile.
00:26:16A crocodile.
00:26:19It got Georgie.
00:26:21Wait.
00:26:23This is...
00:26:24This is a prank, right?
00:26:25No, I'm dead serious.
00:26:29Came out of nowhere and it's...
00:26:36Bit her in half.
00:26:38What's a crocodile doing around here?
00:26:43I don't know, Ben.
00:26:44That doesn't...
00:26:45Matter.
00:26:48The thing is, I can't tell anyone
00:26:51because then they'll know that I was with Georgie
00:26:53and the wedding.
00:26:56Just...
00:26:58Keep an eye out for it.
00:27:02In case it, like, shows up.
00:27:05Alright.
00:27:14Oh, you look lovely.
00:27:24Jolly.
00:27:26Jolly.
00:27:28Dad.
00:27:30Hi, Mum.
00:27:31Hello, darling. How are you?
00:27:33Yeah, I'm...
00:27:35I'm okay, yeah.
00:27:36You seem a bit anxious.
00:27:37Why so nervous?
00:27:38This is the easy bit.
00:27:39It's the next 50 years, it's the hard bit.
00:27:42Just keep your eyes peeled.
00:27:44Okay?
00:28:05My beautiful daughter.
00:28:08Hi, sorry.
00:28:11You look stunning, darling.
00:28:15You don't know where Georgie is, do you?
00:28:17No.
00:28:19It's just that we kind of thought...
00:28:21Never mind.
00:28:23No one's seen her this morning.
00:28:24We have no idea where she is.
00:28:26Where could she have gone?
00:28:28She had a few drinks last night, yeah?
00:28:30Yeah.
00:28:32She hasn't got a reason to vanish.
00:28:34I mean, her depression, anxiety.
00:28:38No.
00:28:40Can she swim?
00:28:41I...
00:28:42I think so.
00:28:44Okay.
00:28:45I'm gonna skirt the grounds.
00:28:46You stay here.
00:28:47Okay.
00:29:09I think so.
00:29:10Okay.
00:29:12I'll show you.
00:29:14I saw a musical vid.
00:29:15Let's go see.
00:29:17I'll show you what he's gonna do.
00:29:19Okay, so...
00:29:21I'll show you...
00:29:23You can go ahead, you know?
00:29:25I'll show you what you're doing.
00:29:27You can go ahead and start.
00:29:29It's like a quantum field.
00:29:31It's like a power...
00:29:33You can go ahead and do this.
00:29:35It's like a bit of a little.
00:32:07Okay.
00:32:08All right.
00:32:10Yeah.
00:32:11You must be so proud.
00:32:15Ooh.
00:32:16We can't find Georgie.
00:32:18Okay.
00:32:20Can we go without her?
00:32:23Without?
00:32:25Dylan's looking for her now.
00:32:27Give us a few minutes.
00:32:27No word?
00:32:34No.
00:32:35The Reverend is getting impatient.
00:32:36We may have to go ahead anyway.
00:32:38One last game.
00:32:39One last game.
00:32:40One last game.
00:32:41Fingers crossed.
00:32:45Fuck.
00:32:46Oh shit.
00:32:48Fuck.
00:32:49Fuck.
00:32:50Oh shit.
00:32:55Shit.
00:32:56If he doesn't turn up in two minutes, we'll have to go ahead without him.
00:32:58No.
00:32:59There's no way I'm getting married without my dad.
00:33:05Shit.
00:33:06If he doesn't turn up in two minutes, we'll have to go ahead without him.
00:33:10What?
00:33:11No.
00:33:12No.
00:33:13There's no way I'm getting married without my dad.
00:33:15You might have to, babe.
00:33:20Are you just gonna walk me down the aisle?
00:33:22Well, I can't, can I?
00:33:24No way.
00:33:25That would be weird.
00:33:28I guess I could.
00:33:30I've almost been like a surrogate parent anyway.
00:33:35I'd like that.
00:33:36Fuck.
00:33:37Fuck.
00:33:38What about?
00:33:40Fuck.
00:33:42Fuck.
00:33:43Fuck.
00:33:51Fuck.
00:33:54Fuck.
00:34:07Where's it, Dad?
00:34:14We can't find him.
00:34:17It's fine.
00:34:27Hey, did he come with the package?
00:34:37Ladies and gentlemen, and these days I'm obligated to say, and those who identify as neither.
00:34:55It's lovely to see you all here today, and I'm so glad that you can make the journey in these difficult times.
00:35:03Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, in the presence of...
00:35:12Almighty God!
00:35:33Get up! Get up!
00:35:38Get up! Get up!
00:35:40Get up!
00:35:41Come on, come on, get up!
00:35:42Get up!
00:35:43Sarah, there's two of them!
00:35:44Sarah, there's two of them!
00:35:51Hey!
00:35:52Get up!
00:35:53Get up!
00:35:55Oh, my God!
00:35:56We gotta go!
00:35:57Oh, my God, my car, my car, my car's on the clock.
00:36:27Oh, my God.
00:36:38Get me here, get me here.
00:36:48What the f*** just happened?
00:36:50I don't know.
00:36:55Get them open!
00:36:56Oh, my God.
00:37:00What the f***?
00:37:03Oh, guys, I'm going to need first aid.
00:37:07What's happening?
00:37:09Why is this happening?
00:37:10Why is this happening to me on my wedding day?
00:37:13First, my birthmate goes missing, and then my dad goes missing, and then...
00:37:20Do you think he's eating them as well?
00:37:31What if it finds us?
00:37:32What if it gets in here?
00:37:34Don't worry.
00:37:35It can't.
00:37:35Get in here.
00:37:36He's the Reverend.
00:37:56Are you all right?
00:37:59Yes, I'm alive, thank God.
00:38:01But others weren't so lucky.
00:38:03Is it just you?
00:38:05Did you see anyone else?
00:38:06Have you seen Amy or V, my dad?
00:38:08I don't know.
00:38:09Everyone went in different directions.
00:38:11So what do we do?
00:38:12Well, call emergency services, and hope that thing doesn't get anyone else in the meantime.
00:38:20It's going to be easier said than done.
00:38:21There's no bars.
00:38:22Is there a landline?
00:38:25Great.
00:38:27And we're f***ed.
00:38:30Sorry.
00:38:32Don't worry.
00:38:33I think I may have just said similar words myself.
00:38:37What now, then?
00:38:38Let's pray.
00:38:41Dear Heavenly Father, we pray for your help in these trying times.
00:38:46We prayed for you to look after us and to protect us against the beast.
00:39:01There's Neil.
00:39:02I've got to find Neil.
00:39:04He went the only way.
00:39:09The car keys.
00:39:12Neil, I've got the keys.
00:39:14Maybe we can make it to the car.
00:39:15Where's Lisa?
00:39:44We have to find Lisa.
00:39:45Don't worry.
00:39:46Look, I'm sure she's fine.
00:39:47The most important thing is we get safe and we get help.
00:39:50Okay.
00:39:50Let's try and get to my car.
00:39:51I've got keys.
00:39:52I've got keys.
00:40:00Help!
00:40:04Help!
00:40:07Help!
00:40:09Help!
00:40:10I'll start it up.
00:40:17I'll start it up.
00:40:17I'll start it up.
00:40:19I'll start it up.
00:40:30I'll start it up.
00:40:35Okay.
00:40:36Pull yourself together.
00:40:39When in times of stress,
00:40:40always go back to your breathing.
00:40:49Oh, thank goodness.
00:40:52Oh, come on.
00:41:02Debbie?
00:41:07God.
00:41:08You're going to be okay.
00:41:12Let's get you to the car.
00:41:28Maybe we should go back.
00:41:29You might be wondering where we are.
00:41:31Or if we're still alive.
00:41:34Maybe we should just wait here
00:41:36and see if someone comes and finds us.
00:41:47Sarah.
00:41:48Don't move.
00:41:49Oh, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
00:41:58Oh, my God, what are we going to...
00:42:01Where are we going?
00:42:02We need to get out of here!
00:42:06We need to get out of here!
00:42:08Help!
00:42:09Help!
00:42:10Get out of here!
00:42:11Help!
00:42:13Help!
00:42:14Get out of here!
00:42:28Help!
00:42:29Get out!
00:42:30What the hell is there?
00:43:00Where is it?
00:43:01It's a crocodile, but I don't know what species is.
00:43:04I thought you were an exploit.
00:43:06No, not exactly.
00:43:07But I do know you shouldn't be living in this climate.
00:43:10And it's also very dangerous.
00:43:13Tell me something I don't know.
00:43:15You've got twiggy hair.
00:43:19Come.
00:43:20Come.
00:43:21Let me untangle it.
00:43:30Is that your distressed look?
00:43:37You didn't answer my question.
00:43:40Yes.
00:43:41It's over.
00:43:42And how are we going to kill it?
00:43:45I don't intend to kill it.
00:43:46I intend to catch it.
00:43:47Right.
00:43:48We need a plan.
00:43:49Agreed.
00:43:50Agreed.
00:43:51Don't look at me.
00:43:52I ain't qualified to give spiritual guidance and the like.
00:43:57Escaping man-eating crocodiles is not my speciality.
00:44:00We just need to kill the bloody thing, sir.
00:44:01Find a big gun and shoot the bastard.
00:44:02And where do you propose we get a gun from?
00:44:07There was...
00:44:25There was...
00:44:28There were shotguns on the farm.
00:44:29Great.
00:44:30We'll just teleport to your parents' farm then and get one, shall we?
00:44:35all right guns are out are we gonna kill this thing we don't have to kill it
00:44:42it's still one of God's creatures and it's clearly upset the crocodile is
00:44:51upset everybody's dying because the crocodile is having a bad day I didn't
00:44:59mean I am upset okay in case you hadn't noticed my wedding day is ruined and
00:45:06people we know are dead all right just calm down don't tell me to calm down
00:45:18Oh God at least we aren't live streaming this can you imagine
00:45:28at least someone would come to our rescue
00:45:32Oh God I wish my dad was there he'd know what to do
00:45:47he's even still out there if anyone knows how to deal with a crocodile it's definitely your dad
00:45:54shit it's Amy
00:46:02oh
00:46:05oh
00:46:09oh
00:46:13oh
00:46:17oh
00:46:19oh
00:46:21oh
00:46:25oh
00:46:27oh
00:46:29oh
00:46:36oh shit shit come on Amy drive
00:46:40it's it's relentless
00:46:44catch it what do you mean catch it exactly that take it to a zoo and tag it
00:46:55really so that thing has run rampage at your daughter's wedding killed I don't know how many
00:47:00people and you want to catch it and keep as a pet that's what I do I protect animals protect them what about the humans that have died
00:47:07oh
00:47:10so you don't care about humans
00:47:14some of them
00:47:15well I bet you'd have a different view of that thing got your daughter
00:47:18she'll be fine
00:47:20she'll be fine
00:47:21not to put her down on things but how do you know that thing could have got her like it got tabby
00:47:26practically bit her in half and it got the cameraman and chewed him around and...
00:47:29because you know alright
00:47:30she'll be fine
00:47:33she'll be fine
00:47:34yeah
00:47:35that's easy for you to say
00:47:36didn't attack you
00:47:37yes it did
00:47:40shit
00:47:42when did that happen
00:47:44earlier
00:47:46in the barn
00:47:47oh god it looks nasty
00:47:49take a look
00:47:50shit that is
00:47:55Amy's in trouble
00:48:05holy father
00:48:06we beseech you to help our friend Amy
00:48:09in her time of need
00:48:11please forgive her her sins
00:48:13whatever they may be
00:48:14and deliver her safely to us
00:48:16just like your son
00:48:19our saviour
00:48:20Jesus Christ delivered us from evil
00:48:23amen
00:48:26one question reverend
00:48:28where was your holy father when the crocodile started to kill everyone a minute ago
00:48:33why should he help Amy when he didn't help them
00:48:39or my parents wherever they are
00:48:41I don't know
00:48:44the lord moves in mysterious ways
00:48:48oh yes he does
00:48:50he put
00:48:53a killer crocodile
00:48:55in the middle of
00:48:57fucking Hampshire
00:48:59it doesn't get much more mysterious does it
00:49:03Charles
00:49:04Amy is in serious danger
00:49:10this is where all that yoga training pays off
00:49:13is
00:49:38I don't know.
00:50:08I don't know.
00:50:38George.
00:50:40Thank my dad.
00:50:43Did you see him?
00:50:45I just know that was him.
00:50:48The crocodile is still out there, so what are we going to do?
00:50:54Wait.
00:50:55Well, I guess we know what happened to Georgie then.
00:51:06I just wish she'd told someone before she wandered off on her own.
00:51:12It doesn't seem like her.
00:51:14It won't be my dad.
00:51:19Did he get you?
00:51:20No.
00:51:21I'm fine.
00:51:22I'm fine.
00:51:23Oh, God.
00:51:24I need to find my dad.
00:51:29Oh, my God.
00:51:30Oh, my God.
00:51:32All right.
00:51:33Did he get you?
00:51:34No.
00:51:35I'm fine.
00:51:36Oh, God.
00:51:38I need to find my dad.
00:51:39Okay.
00:51:40There might be a first aid kit in the pool house.
00:51:46Okay.
00:51:47Let's go.
00:51:48Come on.
00:51:49Come on.
00:51:50Come on.
00:51:51Oh.
00:51:52Oh.
00:51:53Oh.
00:51:54Oh.
00:51:55Oh.
00:51:56Oh.
00:51:57Oh.
00:51:58Okay.
00:51:59It might be a first aid kit in the pool house.
00:52:02Okay.
00:52:03Let's go.
00:52:04Come on.
00:52:05Oh.
00:52:06Oh.
00:52:07Oh.
00:52:08Oh.
00:52:09Oh.
00:52:10Oh.
00:52:11Oh.
00:52:12Oh.
00:52:13Oh.
00:52:14Oh.
00:52:15Oh.
00:52:16Oh.
00:52:17Oh.
00:52:18Oh.
00:52:19Oh.
00:52:21Oh.
00:52:23I have got this.
00:52:25Oh.
00:52:26Oh.
00:52:27Oh.
00:52:32Oh.
00:52:33Oh.
00:52:46Oh.
00:52:48Oh.
00:52:49It's not pretty.
00:53:03I'm sorry, I can't deal with her being in the pool like that.
00:53:08We'll move in a minute.
00:53:13Right, let's see what we can do.
00:53:15You know, I've never seen this side to you before.
00:53:21I thought you were just this womanising, playboy guy who told women he saved leopards for a living.
00:53:28But I don't think that's the real you.
00:53:32After my wife died, I was the real me.
00:53:38It is the real me.
00:53:41Maybe you're living in the past.
00:53:45Maybe.
00:53:49There. Try there.
00:53:54You know, for someone with that proper job, you're pretty useful.
00:54:03Maybe we need to work on your flirting a bit.
00:54:05It's Lisa.
00:54:16Where?
00:54:18She's trying to send a message.
00:54:20Top window.
00:54:21Is that Morse code?
00:54:38Yeah.
00:54:39She remembers.
00:54:40Wow.
00:54:42What's she saying?
00:54:43Charlie's wounded.
00:54:45Charlie's wounded.
00:54:47Are you okay?
00:54:49Thank God for text speak.
00:54:54Question for you, Reverend.
00:54:56Yes?
00:54:56Being a man of the cloth, why do you think God has done something like this?
00:55:00If I say he moves in mysterious ways?
00:55:05Wouldn't cut it.
00:55:06Then I don't know I'm afraid.
00:55:09I'm stumped.
00:55:10You don't think it's because we're all evil?
00:55:13We deserve to die?
00:55:14No, no, no, no.
00:55:16There's lots of good people here.
00:55:19There were.
00:55:21Well...
00:55:21You know, I do wonder, what these natural disasters, hurricanes, floods, fires, people
00:55:37that survive, they often thank God to be alive.
00:55:41But it's the ones that die, I think about.
00:55:44What did they do?
00:55:45If God sent the hurricane and the floods, why did he let some people die and some survive?
00:55:50You know?
00:55:52So what do you think your purpose is here?
00:55:55Is this some kind of test or is it just a coincidence?
00:56:00I don't believe in such things as coincidences.
00:56:03You do think it happened for a reason?
00:56:06Whatever reasons they may be.
00:56:08Who knows?
00:56:09Maybe this is your moment.
00:56:11Your Marta moment.
00:56:16Maybe you're the one that's going to save us
00:56:20and deliver us.
00:56:22Maybe.
00:56:26Right.
00:56:27My dad is in the cool house with Amy lately.
00:56:31Croc is doing laps of this house,
00:56:33so we just need to time it right so we can get them over here.
00:56:37Where do you want me?
00:56:38You stay here.
00:56:40You call to me as soon as you see it coming.
00:56:43I'll signal to them from upstairs and then we just need somebody by the back door.
00:56:48Allow me.
00:56:52Okay.
00:56:52I'm not seeing it.
00:57:05It's going for the pool house.
00:57:06Wait.
00:57:18You don't think it's...
00:57:20Humans don't knock like that.
00:57:24I've never seen a croc use the door handle.
00:57:28Yet.
00:57:31Shit.
00:57:31We need to distract it.
00:57:33We need to get away from there.
00:57:36Wait.
00:57:40Oh my god.
00:57:42Hey!
00:57:43Hey, crocodile!
00:57:44Come and get me!
00:57:46The Reverend's using himself as a decoy.
00:57:48You tell me as soon as the coast is clear.
00:57:50Over here!
00:57:53Okay.
00:57:54Get ready.
00:57:54Get ready.
00:57:54Go!
00:58:17Go!
00:58:24God does work in mysterious ways.
00:58:52Easy.
00:58:53Easy.
00:58:54What's wrong?
00:58:56Just a bit of collateral damage.
00:58:58I'll be fine.
00:59:00I'm so tired.
00:59:03So is this all of us?
00:59:07What are your thoughts?
00:59:09Why is this thing here?
00:59:11Did someone put it here?
00:59:13No.
00:59:14I found its nest.
00:59:17And half a tent.
00:59:19And this.
00:59:20Okay.
00:59:20I don't know why it's here.
00:59:25I don't know how it survived.
00:59:27But that's why I need to capture it.
00:59:29Capture it?
00:59:31What?
00:59:32Like, take it alive?
00:59:34Mate, I know you're all for saving the wildlife, but that thing has killed dozens of people,
00:59:39including my family, and it's trying to get us.
00:59:41Now, if it's easier to kill it, I say kill it.
00:59:44I agree.
00:59:47Dad, I know you want to save it, but that thing is dangerous.
00:59:52You're already injured.
00:59:53Can we please just be sensible?
00:59:54Well, if we can capture it, if it's at all possible, let's do that.
01:00:03So now what?
01:00:04We stay put.
01:00:05We batten down the hatches.
01:00:07Keep it out.
01:00:08We've got food we can survive.
01:00:10Until someone comes to help us, or we can find some opportunity to escape.
01:00:15In the meantime, we shut and bolt the doors.
01:00:19We shut the windows.
01:00:20We double-check them.
01:00:21We make weapons.
01:00:23Knives, sticks, boiling water.
01:00:25Whatever we can to hurt it.
01:00:27To slow it down, to trap it.
01:00:29We make this place a fortress.
01:00:35I don't see the point in this.
01:00:38It's a hotel.
01:00:39It's not like we're going to find heavy-duty rope or a tranquilizer gun.
01:00:44If you do find a tranquilizer gun, use it on me.
01:00:51It's starting to sting a little.
01:00:59Nothing up there but a load of old bedsheets.
01:01:19I only found a couple of kitchen knives.
01:01:21I don't think anyone expected this place to be under siege.
01:01:23I found a firebreaker and croquet mallets.
01:01:33What are these?
01:01:35They're clothes.
01:01:37They're your clothes, aren't they?
01:01:40I...
01:01:41You were wearing them last night, I remember.
01:01:44There are photos of us together.
01:01:45So what were they doing stashed downstairs?
01:01:50I went on a walk last night, after everyone had gone to bed,
01:01:54and I was a little drunk.
01:01:58I couldn't see where I was going,
01:01:59and I walked face first into the pond.
01:02:03When I got back, I threw them down there
01:02:06because I didn't want anyone to see me soaking wet.
01:02:08I cut myself when I was in the pond.
01:02:17They've got to have a sign or a fence or something.
01:02:21It's insane.
01:02:21Bullshit.
01:02:23You were with Georgie, weren't you?
01:02:25No.
01:02:26Don't lie to me.
01:02:28I know you were with her.
01:02:29Just tell me the truth.
01:02:31I know you've always had a thing for her.
01:02:33Okay, we went on the walk together,
01:02:37but that's all that happened, I swear.
01:02:41The crocodile attacked her, and I freaked out.
01:02:46You're a f***ing liar!
01:02:49Do you know how I know?
01:02:51Because I've told plenty of lies.
01:02:54I should drag you out there and feed you to the f***ing rocks.
01:02:57Dad, stop, please.
01:02:59Tell me why I shouldn't.
01:03:01The punishment usually needs to fit the crime.
01:03:05Oh, it does.
01:03:06Stop!
01:03:08Enough people have died today.
01:03:10You don't need another.
01:03:11No matter how much you think it is.
01:03:13I'm so sorry.
01:03:17It meant nothing.
01:03:19God, what an excuse.
01:03:22So when you proposed to me,
01:03:24did that mean nothing?
01:03:27Or our wedding vows, if we had got that far,
01:03:29would they have meant nothing?
01:03:31I'm so done with you.
01:03:36Arsehole.
01:03:44I'll be right back.
01:03:47You don't say a word.
01:03:51And you give me that.
01:03:54My life is a mess, Amy.
01:04:07Oh, God, it's a disaster.
01:04:11I have a pointless job that serves no real purpose.
01:04:19Something my dad likes to remind me of every time he sees me.
01:04:24My wedding day has gone from s*** to worse.
01:04:28And I just found out that my fiancé has been shagging one of my friends.
01:04:36My friend who is now dead.
01:04:38And to top it off, we are still being hunted by the crocodile from hell.
01:04:48I'm not going to lie.
01:04:52You're not living your best life right now.
01:04:56But your job isn't pointless.
01:04:59Millions of people appreciate what you do.
01:05:01And as for Charlie, it's a good job you found out now.
01:05:07Imagine if you'd married him.
01:05:09Once a cheat, always a cheat.
01:05:12True.
01:05:13We're going to avenge your friend's death and kill that damn crocodile.
01:05:18Yeah.
01:05:19Good.
01:05:20Is there anything else I can help you with?
01:05:23Yeah.
01:05:24Make me a sandwich.
01:05:26I'm f***ing starving.
01:05:50So what?
01:06:03We just wait until someone finds us?
01:06:07I guess so.
01:06:10Take ages.
01:06:12I know.
01:06:14We don't even have the Wi-Fi to entertain us.
01:06:20Well, I guess I'll make a break.
01:06:23Good idea.
01:06:26I'll see if anyone else wants one.
01:06:27It's in the house!
01:06:54The crocodile's in the house!
01:06:55It's inside!
01:07:01It's down there!
01:07:04It can't climb stairs, can it?
01:07:06It'll figure them out.
01:07:08It needs to block the stairs.
01:07:09It's down there.
01:07:10It's down there.
01:07:32Oh, my God.
01:07:44Look at her.
01:07:49Let's just stop it.
01:07:53Lisa, are you okay?
01:07:55Yeah, we're all right.
01:07:58I'm not sure I trust this door, though.
01:08:00Stay there. I'll figure it out.
01:08:06You guys okay?
01:08:08Yeah.
01:08:09What now?
01:08:10I have a revolver in the car.
01:08:13You've had a gun this whole time.
01:08:15I keep it for emergencies.
01:08:18And it's only just now become an emergency.
01:08:21Yeah, there's one problem.
01:08:24It's the key to understand next to my coat.
01:08:30Okay.
01:08:45That's the end of it.
01:08:47Okay.
01:08:48Come on, Dad.
01:09:03Where the is the crook?
01:09:04We got him!
01:09:20I'm going out the window.
01:09:28Good luck.
01:09:29All right.
01:09:30I'm gonna have a gun.
01:09:31I can't be able to get her.
01:09:32I'll go.
01:09:33I've got a gun.
01:09:34I'm gonna have to go.
01:09:35Oh, my God.
01:10:05Oh, my God.
01:10:35Oh, my God.
01:10:37Cock it.
01:10:39Undo safety.
01:10:41Oh, my God.
01:10:43Oh, my God.
01:10:47Oh, my God.
01:10:49Oh, my God.
01:10:53Oh, my God.
01:10:55Oh, my God.
01:10:57Oh, my God.
01:11:07Oh, my God.
01:11:09Oh, my God.
01:11:11Oh, my God.
01:11:13Let's go.
01:11:43Dad!
01:11:48Kill this thing now!
01:12:04Dad?
01:12:10What was that?
01:12:17That is a bad idea.
01:12:22Now listen, it's up to you two now.
01:12:26You're gonna have to work out how to kill it. Remember everything I've taught you. Use your initiative. I know you can do it.
01:12:37Okay.
01:12:48All right. Think. Think. What do we have? What can we use?
01:12:54You lure it in. Our cave is headed with this. You're on your own there. No. No, I think we need less direct methods.
01:13:07Glasses slow it down. Yeah. But then what?
01:13:22We set fire to it. I like the way you think. And we have flares.
01:13:38So, we take the flares. We guide it to an outbuilding and shut the door and set fire to it.
01:13:46We could use the pool house. We could drop it in the pool.
01:13:50No. No. We just climb out.
01:13:53What can we drain it?
01:14:00Maybe we don't have to.
01:14:02What's that?
01:14:13It's venison from Neil's farm. It's supposed to be for dinner.
01:14:19Don't f*** this up. I mean, it's shame to waste it.
01:14:32Make her proud.
01:15:02Buy her.
01:15:08Here we go.
01:16:12Come on.
01:16:33Come on.
01:16:34Come on.
01:16:44Let it in the pool.
01:16:52Over here.
01:17:00Come on.
01:17:02Come on.
01:17:10Come on.
01:17:12Come on.
01:17:14Come on.
01:17:16Come on.
01:17:26Come on.
01:17:28Come on.
01:17:30Come on.
01:17:32Come on.
01:17:34Come on.
01:17:36Come on.
01:17:38Come on.
01:17:40Come on.
01:17:42Come on.
01:17:44Come on.
01:17:46Come on.
01:17:48Come on.
01:17:50Come on.
01:17:52Come on.
01:17:54Come on.
01:17:56Come on.
01:17:58Come on.
01:18:00Come on.
01:18:02Come on.
01:18:04Come on.
01:18:06Come on.
01:18:08Come on.
01:18:10Come on.
01:18:12Come on.
01:18:14Come on.
01:18:16Come on.
01:18:18Come on.
01:18:20Come on.
01:18:22Come on.
01:18:24Come on.
01:18:25You're late.
01:18:26What can I say?
01:18:27You two make a great team.
01:18:29Come on.
01:18:30Come on.
01:18:31Come on.
01:18:32Come on.
01:18:33Come on.
01:18:34Come on.
01:18:35Come on.
01:18:36Come on.
01:18:37Come on.
01:18:38Come on.
01:18:43We need to get you to a hospital.
01:18:45Hospital?
01:18:46Oh, yes.
01:18:47Your leg's about to drop off and I want you in one piece.
01:18:51You want me in one piece?
01:18:54Please may I have?
01:18:56You all right?
01:19:08Don't even.
01:19:10I'm sorry darling.
01:19:15Look at it this way.
01:19:17Your honeymoon can't be any worse.
01:19:26You have to go.
01:19:27You'll be right back.
01:19:29Hey wow!
01:19:31Bye.
01:19:33You're welcome.
01:19:34You're welcome.
01:19:35You're welcome.
01:19:37Bye.
01:19:38Bye.
01:19:39Bye.
01:19:40Bye.
01:19:41Bye.
01:19:42Bye.
01:19:43Bye.
01:19:44Bye.
01:19:46Bye.
01:19:48Bye.
01:19:49Bye.
01:19:51Bye.
01:19:52Bye.
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