Perfect Boyfriend HD

Full English Movie

17 hours ago

Transcript

00:00:00excuse me but you look familiar i'm sorry what do you work in the veterinary office

00:00:08oh that's got to be it you look so familiar i'm betty and and my poodle's name is misty

00:00:16the teacup black one no i'm sorry betty i'm a writer maybe you've read one of my books

00:00:21oh what's your name i write under the pen name mercedes lee love letter is it christian romance

00:00:27no is it amish oh how i love those amish novels definitely not amish

00:00:37are you writing now yes may i see i'm afraid i don't let anyone see my work in progress

00:00:44needs an editor's touch oh you were in here yesterday too right and the day before

00:00:49okay what's the problem did management send you in here oh no no i i'm just the baker

00:01:00betty the baker you do the cookies yes i make the cookies the scones holy cow those scones are

00:01:08delish do you really think so oh yes have you tried the danishes i haven't seen the danishes

00:01:13i usually get here around 10 they must be gone by 10. oh well that's a good sign i think so too

00:01:20good for you betty well how many days have you been in here is there something terribly wrong with

00:01:27your car i bet they could get you a rental actually i'm not really a writer betty can you keep a secret

00:01:36i'm here with corporate we've been worried about the service in this branch so they sent me here to

00:01:42scope things out for a few weeks well i've never heard any complaints before but you wouldn't it's all

00:01:47very internal but i'm gonna need you to keep my presence here quiet that's okay mom's the word

00:01:55thank you for your discretion we aren't worried about you at all hi dean kade i don't need an oil

00:02:21change yes but you're my friend and you'll do anything for me i need your car so i don't blow my

00:02:27cover i lied to an old lady i'm in deep this is so desperate it doesn't matter what matters is that

00:02:35i've got my writing mojo back and i'm not giving it up please why don't you just find a back entrance

00:02:43instead of borrowing every neighbor's car you never thought of that this deadline has me freaked out

00:02:51okay no whatever wait you don't need my car no

00:03:21okay

00:03:31so

00:03:33so

00:03:35Oh, shit.

00:04:05Are you okay?

00:04:07Oh, my God, my computer.

00:04:12Okay, it's not cracked, but will it boot?

00:04:16Oh, rookie mistake.

00:04:17This is what I get for not backing it up.

00:04:20Oh, okay.

00:04:24Whew.

00:04:27Hey.

00:04:30Are you hurt?

00:04:33Huh?

00:04:48You, uh, you work here?

00:04:52I do.

00:04:54I'm a mechanic.

00:04:56Were you getting a service?

00:05:01Yes.

00:05:02Then what brings you back here?

00:05:05Completed cars are out front.

00:05:07These back doors are the employee entrance.

00:05:09Right.

00:05:10I, um, was coming out for a smoke.

00:05:14Great.

00:05:15Can I bum one?

00:05:17Weren't you just fake-smoking licorice?

00:05:20You saw that?

00:05:22Yes.

00:05:23Before my triumphant fall, I saw something that looked like a make-believe cloud of cherry smoke floating all around you.

00:05:30I quit smoking three months ago.

00:05:34And licorice helps.

00:05:35Doesn't hurt.

00:05:36Maybe it hurts the ego.

00:05:38How macho is it to fake smoke candy?

00:05:41My ego is never in danger, babe.

00:05:44Well, with book boyfriend arms like that, it's no wonder.

00:05:48Book boyfriend?

00:05:49Book boyfriend.

00:05:51The leading man in a romance novel that readers claim ownership of because he doesn't likely exist in the real world.

00:05:58Basically, the ideal man.

00:06:00I haven't heard of that before.

00:06:02I take it you're into books or something?

00:06:05Or something.

00:06:08And it doesn't surprise me you've never heard of it.

00:06:12You're not my demo.

00:06:15What if you're my demo?

00:06:24Well, we won't know that until the end.

00:06:39Fessa, where have you been?

00:06:41The library, like I told you in my text.

00:06:44Bullshit.

00:06:47You smell like coffee and rubber.

00:06:49It's known as freedom.

00:06:51You actually went back to the tire depot.

00:06:54Kate, come on.

00:06:55They are going to call the cops on you.

00:06:56For what?

00:06:57Stealing complimentary coffee and cookies?

00:06:59Come on.

00:07:00That's not a thing.

00:07:01But loitering is.

00:07:04You think they'd really do that?

00:07:07Anyway, I found a back entrance.

00:07:10No more borrowing cars.

00:07:11Oh, that's even better.

00:07:13You're skulking in and out of side entrances.

00:07:15Brilliant.

00:07:16I don't care, Lindsay.

00:07:17I found my words at the TD.

00:07:19And I'm not letting go until I'm done.

00:07:21The TD?

00:07:22Tiger Depot.

00:07:23It's such a mouthful.

00:07:24You know what's a mouthful?

00:07:26Risen.

00:07:27This is a crutch, Kate.

00:07:29You've got to see that.

00:07:31Who cares?

00:07:32I couldn't write a thing before I went there.

00:07:34And writing is what keeps me in this posh townhouse on the outskirts of beautiful Boulder.

00:07:39If I want to continue being this stunning creature living the high life, I have to follow the vibe.

00:07:43And the vibe is strong at Tire Depot.

00:07:47Can we stop dancing around what's really going on here?

00:07:49Watch yourself.

00:07:50That is luxury reclaimed Barnwood.

00:07:53This is about your ex?

00:07:56Who happens to still live with you?

00:07:58He's gone for the summer.

00:08:00That is hardly living together.

00:08:02And as soon as he gets back, I'm not budging.

00:08:04We're playing this game of chicken and there's no way I'm letting that entitled fucker take this house.

00:08:09So even though you can't write in it, you want to fight for the house with no vibe?

00:08:14That's irrelevant.

00:08:15There's no way in hell I'm moving.

00:08:17I have to write a follow-up bestseller.

00:08:20That is no small feat.

00:08:22I live next door to my best friend.

00:08:24You don't want me to move out, do you?

00:08:26No.

00:08:29What?

00:08:30It looks like a letter from Tire Depot.

00:08:32They figured it out?

00:08:33Stop being so dramatic.

00:08:35Have they ever mailed you something before?

00:08:36No.

00:08:37Oh my god, what if this is the moment I feared?

00:08:40They might be taking my mojo away.

00:08:42Dear Miss Smith, we have taken notice of your enjoyment of our customer waiting area.

00:08:47Read it.

00:08:49An invoice for refreshments?

00:08:52Holy shit!

00:08:53How do they know?

00:08:55What?

00:08:56$180 for lattes and cookies.

00:08:58Kate, how many did you eat?

00:09:00I don't eat lunch.

00:09:02Wait a damn minute.

00:09:05What?

00:09:06This has danishes here.

00:09:07Okay.

00:09:08I have never had a danish there in my life.

00:09:10You haven't.

00:09:11I'm being pumped.

00:09:16Dean.

00:09:25Okay, here's the plan.

00:09:26I'm gonna kneel here.

00:09:27You knock on the door.

00:09:28When he opens it, jump punch.

00:09:31Kate!

00:09:33What if he didn't do it?

00:09:34I mean, that's so extreme.

00:09:36Surely he has a punch to the balls out coming for something.

00:09:39He's a mountain man whore.

00:09:40They always have it coming.

00:09:43Why are you so mature?

00:09:45You're a dick.

00:09:46And I know that fake invoice was from you.

00:09:51Nice to see you too, Kate.

00:09:56Just be grateful she didn't junk punch you.

00:09:58I saved you from that.

00:10:00Thanks, Linz.

00:10:01Mm-hmm.

00:10:02How'd you know it was me?

00:10:04The letterhead was too perfect.

00:10:07And I know you know how to use Photoshop.

00:10:10You should try to suck more.

00:10:12Oh, that is the first time I've heard that.

00:10:14You should have seen her, Dane.

00:10:15I thought she was going to start crying when she saw that letterhead.

00:10:18Look, I tried to get you to come check out my co-working space.

00:10:21We've got coffee and donuts there too, you know?

00:10:23Eh, those aren't my people.

00:10:25Not my vibe.

00:10:27And your vibe is this tire shop.

00:10:30You gotta see it to believe it, man.

00:10:32If you find your vibe somewhere, you have to fight for it.

00:10:36Tire Depot is to me what Fanny Braun was to John Keats.

00:10:41Poetry in motion, man.

00:10:43Okay, you sound like a lunatic.

00:10:45What if you could work better and faster elsewhere?

00:10:49You'd have more time to hike, bang chicks, prank your friends,

00:10:54buy more plaid trousers.

00:10:56Oh, you been noticing my slacks, Kate?

00:10:58No, and don't change the subject.

00:11:01I feel like a fucking champion when I'm blasting out words

00:11:05and sitting next to some gal who's wasting her life on social media.

00:11:08It's a real morale boost for Mercedes Lee Love Letter.

00:11:12And I still can't believe you hit a bestseller list with that pen name.

00:11:14My readers get me.

00:11:17They'd have to.

00:11:18So you're going back there tomorrow?

00:11:20Hells yeah.

00:11:21This smut won't write itself.

00:11:23I have two large pizzas, parmesan breadsticks, a pound of boneless wings, and three dipping sauces.

00:11:32Mercedes Lee Love Letter.

00:11:33I have two large pizzas, parmesan breadsticks, a pound of boneless wings, and three dipping sauces.

00:11:42Claim it now or it's going in the trash.

00:11:43I'm Mercedes.

00:11:44I've been calling your name for like five minutes.

00:11:45I didn't order a pizza.

00:11:46I don't care.

00:11:47Fucking whore.

00:11:49I'm trying to keep a low profile.

00:11:50I'm trying to keep a low profile.

00:11:51Everyone is safe.

00:11:52I'm trying to keep a low profile.

00:11:54Everyone is staring at me.

00:11:55I'm fucking mortified.

00:11:56Laughing so fucking hard.

00:11:57Laughing so fucking hard.

00:12:00I'm trying to keep a low profile.

00:12:04Laughing so fucking hard.

00:12:06Laughing so fucking hard.

00:12:11Laughing so fucking hard.

00:12:12I'm trying to keep a low profile.

00:12:17Laughing so fucking hard.

00:12:19Laughing ago.

00:12:20Laughing so fucking hard.

00:12:30Ugh.

00:12:31wheezing on the floor how do you have time for this don't you have a book to write

00:12:39oh best 53 bucks I ever spent

00:13:01you're back I had an issue with one of my tires which car I drive the Cadillac SRX a Cadillac isn't that

00:13:20kind of an old lady car it is not an old lady car it is a luxury SUV and it is wonderful well if you

00:13:29have that kind of money you should look into a Lexus or a BMW much more sexy feel to the body

00:13:34well maybe I don't want a sexy body feel what's your name my name is Mercedes that's perfect

00:13:45you'd look damn fine in a Mercedes

00:13:47what do you drive an Indian motorcycle why am I not surprised am I that predictable more predictable

00:13:56than my old lady car well it's nice to officially meet you Mercedes I'm miles Hudson

00:14:04now tell me why you're really here would some leftover pizza keep you quiet I might buy you

00:14:16some time time is all I need you're serious super serious very well Mercedes I'll leave you be

00:14:26for now see you around the water cooler miles

00:14:29you haven't noticed that hot redhead in the comfort center have you

00:14:44nope was she there today yeah and yesterday

00:14:52what was she doing just on her computer

00:14:56so she's safe any free Wi-Fi call the cops we got a mooch on our hands

00:15:02I don't get a mooch vibe from her mostly feels like desperation

00:15:08hmm now it all makes sense you have a fetish for desperate girls bro

00:15:15I do not yes you do you like to save them be the gallant protector sweeps in guards them

00:15:23this girl does not need saving so she's nothing like Jocelyn

00:15:30dude I'm done with Jocelyn can we please stop talking about her

00:15:34you got dumped by your longtime sweetheart for some rich ugly prick

00:15:39that shit sticks with you forever

00:15:42what a sausage fest why do we live here again

00:15:46because my uncle's the manager and no other boss would put up with our shit

00:15:52and maybe that

00:15:53oh definitely that

00:15:57oh

00:16:20Hey, Justin. I'm going to close up the night, okay?

00:16:45Hey, Red.

00:16:51Mercedes?

00:16:58Shit, did I bust out?

00:17:00Yeah. Have you fainted before?

00:17:03Only when I don't eat.

00:17:05Why didn't you have a cookie or something?

00:17:09I feel bad eating all the cookies.

00:17:13Betty worked so hard on them.

00:17:15It's bad enough that I drink all the coffee.

00:17:19What's wrong?

00:17:21No one ever tells her how good those cookies are.

00:17:25I got here early so that I could try her danishes, and they were already gone.

00:17:31How crazy is that?

00:17:35Betty has to get up so early to make them fresh every day, and then people just gobble them up in seconds.

00:17:40I wonder if anyone appreciates her in her life.

00:17:44Do you know if she's married?

00:17:49Betty gets a hug for me every time I see her.

00:17:53The guys here love her baked goods.

00:17:55Really?

00:17:56Really.

00:17:56That's really sweet.

00:18:00I'm sorry.

00:18:01I get emotional when I'm hungry.

00:18:04You know how some people get hangry, I get amongry?

00:18:08Emotional and hungry?

00:18:09It's a thing.

00:18:10I got them to add it to Urban Dictionary.

00:18:14Well, let's get you something to eat, then.

00:18:16Like pizza, not cookies.

00:18:18I love pizza.

00:18:19I know.

00:18:20I saw your shirt the other day.

00:18:22With the pizza?

00:18:23I love that shirt.

00:18:24Oh, my God.

00:18:30I am probably bugging you.

00:18:33Oh, you're not.

00:18:34Please, I practically just fainted in your arms.

00:18:40We could not get any more book worthy if we tried.

00:18:43Mercedes, this isn't the first time I've had a girl faint at the side of me.

00:18:46Just feed me before you start reciting any more cheesy romance novel lines.

00:19:04I had to kill a guy for these.

00:19:06I hope you didn't get blood on them.

00:19:16Jesus, now what?

00:19:21Oh, come on.

00:19:22There was nothing sexy about that.

00:19:24I just stuffed my face with a breadstick.

00:19:29So, what are you so busy doing every day that you forget to eat?

00:19:34All I can say is that I was in the zone.

00:19:38You need to drink water.

00:19:41On a day that you didn't faint into my arms, you could have a beer first.

00:19:44But please, for my own sanity, will you drink some water first?

00:20:01Now, tell me what you're doing every day.

00:20:05Think of this as a safe space.

00:20:08Nothing will be held against you.

00:20:09And you've been doing this for over three weeks now?

00:20:15Basically.

00:20:17But why won't you tell me what you're writing?

00:20:20Because it weirds people out.

00:20:22I won't judge.

00:20:23You'll judge.

00:20:25Well, if you tell me you're writing the next Game of Thrones,

00:20:28we'll basically have to get married and live happily ever after.

00:20:31It's not the next Game of Thrones,

00:20:34but thank you for the most romantic proposal I've ever received.

00:20:39You get a lot of proposals?

00:20:42Yeah.

00:20:44Only from guys with issues.

00:20:46I don't have issues.

00:20:50Where were you born?

00:20:52Utah.

00:20:54What brought you here?

00:20:57Tech school.

00:20:57Did you know anyone when you moved out here?

00:21:01I followed this girl.

00:21:05What was she like?

00:21:06I don't want to talk about her.

00:21:07Ooh.

00:21:08Yikes.

00:21:09Did I just stumble on a sore spot?

00:21:11Say the word and I'll stop.

00:21:12Word.

00:21:13Got it.

00:21:13No ex-girlfriend talk.

00:21:17I mean, I'm over her,

00:21:18but I just don't like to think about her.

00:21:20I totally get it.

00:21:23Douchebag ex-boyfriend over here.

00:21:24Okay.

00:21:27So what do you do when you're not working?

00:21:33I like to ride my motorcycle,

00:21:37hike,

00:21:38read.

00:21:39Occasionally I go to the lake.

00:21:41Hmm.

00:21:42Cool.

00:21:43Well, I'll make sure to go shopping for my Harley this weekend.

00:21:46You do that.

00:21:48Come on.

00:21:49Let's get you back to the shop

00:21:50before I start boring you

00:21:52with why you should get an Indian instead of a Harley.

00:21:54Woof.

00:21:55Mechanic talk.

00:21:57Sounds kinky.

00:22:27With weights and treadmills, it's born in powerful, grungy garages where men, real fucking men, work with their hands.

00:22:57Another week of work down.

00:23:05You look hyper-focused.

00:23:07Yeah.

00:23:08I, um, I got a new book idea today.

00:23:13Any big plans for the weekend?

00:23:15My buddy and I might go to the Golden Gate Park tomorrow.

00:23:18We try to camp and hit this great hiking trail there every summer.

00:23:21Sounds fun.

00:23:23Super masculine.

00:23:26What about you?

00:23:28Oh, I will probably do some more writing.

00:23:31Sounds exciting.

00:23:33Oh, it is.

00:23:34Well, you have a good weekend.

00:23:40I have no idea why I just kissed you on the cheek.

00:23:44That was really inappropriate.

00:23:46No worries here.

00:23:48Endless dirty thoughts live rent-free in my mind.

00:23:51I swear I'm usually a lot smoother than this.

00:23:54Don't worry.

00:23:55Your book boyfriend status is still very much secure.

00:23:59See you Monday, Mercedes.

00:24:02See you at the coffee machine.

00:24:12Cheers, buddy.

00:24:13Cheers.

00:24:18What are you waiting for, bro?

00:24:19She tells you she has dirty thoughts and you don't think, yeah, I'm going to tap her.

00:24:25Nah, she's too cool for a random hookup.

00:24:27Then I'd have to see her every day in the comfort center.

00:24:30It would be awkward.

00:24:32Wait, you just don't go in there anymore after you bang her.

00:24:35Boom, problem solved.

00:24:37Two.

00:24:38I like seeing her.

00:24:43Oh, my gosh, thank you.

00:24:48Is that that same red hair?

00:24:52Yeah.

00:24:54Ooh.

00:24:57I'll visit you in jail.

00:24:58What?

00:25:00Yeah, when you get arrested for killing that guy, I will visit you in jail.

00:25:07Dude, I thought you were just friends with this girl.

00:25:10I am.

00:25:11Wouldn't fucking call it, bro.

00:25:15Hey, Miles.

00:25:16Hey, Mercedes.

00:25:16Fancy seeing you here.

00:25:19I thought you were going camping.

00:25:23I thought you were riding.

00:25:25Girl needs a break sometimes.

00:25:27I'll find a coffee shop tomorrow.

00:25:31This is my buddy, Sam.

00:25:34Hey.

00:25:35Nice to meet you.

00:25:36Hi.

00:25:37Mercedes.

00:25:38Right, Mercedes.

00:25:39Well, I will...

00:25:43Can I buy you a drink?

00:25:45Drink sounds good.

00:25:47Here, take my spot.

00:25:49I'm going to go say hi to a friend.

00:25:50He's the DJ tonight.

00:25:53Thanks.

00:25:54Nice to meet you.

00:25:55Yeah, you too.

00:25:59What's your poison?

00:26:00What's your poison?

00:26:10Miles.

00:26:12Mercedes.

00:26:14Why haven't you asked me to hang out again since we had pizza together?

00:26:19Tire Depot seems safer.

00:26:21Safer.

00:26:24Meaning that I won't run into you and break my computer again?

00:26:29Something like that.

00:26:32So what are your plans really tonight?

00:26:34You're just hanging out with Sam or are you guys on the hunt?

00:26:38On the hunt?

00:26:40For tail.

00:26:42A one-night stand that gets really awkward in the morning because she wants to make you pancakes.

00:26:47But you would rather chew your arm off and sneak out before she wakes up.

00:26:51Something like that.

00:26:54I could tell that about you.

00:26:55How?

00:26:56It's my business.

00:27:02So, what's your type?

00:27:04Draws your eye.

00:27:05What are we working with here?

00:27:07I don't know.

00:27:11Burnettes, I guess.

00:27:14My ex was a blonde.

00:27:16No more blondes.

00:27:16Burnettes it is.

00:27:19Let's see.

00:27:19Not my friend Lindsay.

00:27:23She already dated my friend Dean and it was so awkward for months after.

00:27:29What about her?

00:27:32Nah, I try to avoid packs.

00:27:34There's always one friend who cock blocks.

00:27:36One friend who tries to steal the guy.

00:27:38And one friend who slut shames the other two.

00:27:39Man, girls can be mean.

00:27:44You're telling me.

00:27:47What about you?

00:27:49Why aren't you on the hunt?

00:27:51You said you're over your ex, right?

00:27:53Oh, I totally am.

00:27:55He is vile.

00:27:56And your friend Dean isn't a prospect?

00:27:58No way.

00:28:02He is my neighbor.

00:28:03And he reminds me of my brother.

00:28:05Uh-huh.

00:28:08You know what?

00:28:08You're right, Miles.

00:28:10I should totally find a random hookup tonight.

00:28:13Well, I never said anything about random.

00:28:15Well, you're doing it, so why can't I?

00:28:17You don't seem like the random type.

00:28:19Well, maybe I should be.

00:28:28Can I tell you a secret, Miles?

00:28:37You can tell me anything, Mercedes.

00:28:44My writing makes me horny.

00:28:46I'm sorry, what?

00:28:48I'm serious.

00:28:50I have a sex toy that works really fast and really well.

00:28:53But sometimes I just miss the heat of a man, you know?

00:28:58Not really.

00:29:00I'm the heat of a woman.

00:29:03You know what I'm talking about?

00:29:05The heat.

00:29:07You might have to elaborate with great detail.

00:29:11You asked for it.

00:29:15The heat of a woman is so much more than temperature.

00:29:20It's her soft, sensual curves.

00:29:25The way that your fingers dig into the meat of her thighs when she's wrapped around you.

00:29:30The delicate little bumps on her ribcage when she's throwing her head back in pleasure.

00:29:36Tight little nipples.

00:29:38And pillows of creamy softness.

00:29:41The fact that you could fold your body around her and envelop her almost entirely.

00:29:48And still want more.

00:29:54That kind of heat.

00:29:55You're totally right, Veronica.

00:30:04Dammit.

00:30:06I didn't want you to know.

00:30:08Why not?

00:30:09What's the big secret?

00:30:11Because it'll change the way that you look at me.

00:30:14How so?

00:30:15You'll either think that I'm some kind of sex freak.

00:30:18Or you'll be embarrassed by what I do and not want to tell anyone.

00:30:22Are you joking?

00:30:24Well, your buddy doesn't count.

00:30:25He's probably a hornball.

00:30:27I mean anyone that is important to you.

00:30:32It's a big reason why my ex and I broke up.

00:30:34He asked me to lie to his family about what I did for a living.

00:30:38What a fucker.

00:30:40Yes.

00:30:41But I write some really kinky shit.

00:30:43But it's not exactly easy to tell your grandma about.

00:30:46I would tell my grandma about you.

00:30:49You would not.

00:30:51I fucking would.

00:30:52Grandmas hate me.

00:30:54My grandma hates me.

00:30:55She's really religious.

00:30:56And every time that I come home, she tries to arrange for a meeting with me and her priest.

00:31:01She thinks that I need an intervention.

00:31:03Or an exorcism or something.

00:31:05I'm sorry, that's not funny.

00:31:07It's kind of funny.

00:31:08Come with me.

00:31:13Where are we going?

00:31:19Calling my grandma.

00:31:20No, Miles, are you insane?

00:31:21It's after midnight.

00:31:22She loves me.

00:31:23I'm her favorite.

00:31:25Okay, okay.

00:31:26We'll call my sister.

00:31:27Miles, what are you doing?

00:31:29Too late.

00:31:30Oh, hello.

00:31:34Meg?

00:31:35Oh.

00:31:35I want to ask you a question.

00:31:38Why is it so loud?

00:31:39Miles, how is it possible for you to call for me from 500 miles away?

00:31:44Big Brother Intuition.

00:31:45Just asked your question.

00:31:47Okay, so I met this girl.

00:31:48She's super fucking hot.

00:31:50Grudge, Miles.

00:31:51Sorry, okay.

00:31:52So she writes sexy books.

00:31:54Like, that's her job.

00:31:55Dirty, kinky shit, I think.

00:31:58And she was saying that grandmothers hated her.

00:32:00And I said our grandma would be totally into it.

00:32:03True or false?

00:32:04Duh, Grams is a freak.

00:32:05Totally true.

00:32:11So, who is this girl?

00:32:13I want to read her stuff.

00:32:15I'll find out.

00:32:16But I'll call you back, mate.

00:32:19Don't fuck that dude tonight.

00:32:23What happened?

00:32:24What did I say?

00:32:25What are we doing?

00:32:27I don't know.

00:32:28I just kissed you, I guess.

00:32:30Yes, you did.

00:32:31And as hot as that was, we have to stop.

00:32:34Right.

00:32:35We're in public.

00:32:38I like you, Mercedes, but I'm not in the position to like someone right now.

00:32:43Wait, what?

00:32:46After everything that you just said with your sister?

00:32:48Got it.

00:32:53Got it.

00:32:54Well, I'm sorry to put you through such a difficult situation.

00:32:57Mercedes, wait.

00:32:59I don't want things to be weird.

00:33:02Well, you shouldn't have flirted with me then.

00:33:05See you around, Miles.

00:33:06Why are you here?

00:33:21Oh, my God.

00:33:22What is that horrible smell?

00:33:25It's nothing.

00:33:26Wait, wait.

00:33:27Is that a tire-scented candle?

00:33:29No.

00:33:29Stop it!

00:33:32You're going to make me so whack so much more!

00:33:34Let go so I can see what you're hiding!

00:33:36No!

00:33:37Kate!

00:33:38Hello?

00:33:43Don't stop on my account.

00:33:45Oh, burnt rubber-scented soy candle?

00:33:49Can you believe this is a thing?

00:33:51Jesus, H.

00:33:52You got it bad, Kate.

00:33:54I know!

00:33:56Can't write a damn word, and all I want to do is go back to Tire Depot.

00:33:59Then go!

00:34:01So you kissed him and he turned you down?

00:34:03Big deal!

00:34:05What, are you in the seventh grade?

00:34:07Go back to the Tire Depot!

00:34:08She has a point, Kate.

00:34:09It'll be awkward for a day.

00:34:10Three tops.

00:34:11He'll probably stay in the garage and ignore you.

00:34:14You're right.

00:34:17My house smells like shit now, too.

00:34:21Fine.

00:34:22I'll go back.

00:34:24But only because burnt rubber is not the same as new rubber.

00:34:26So we rotate and balance the wires, but the rattling sound that you were hearing,

00:34:34unfortunately, at the moment, is where there was two of them.

00:34:39So that the

00:34:57works

00:34:58At the moment, it was so sick.

00:35:01It was so cool.

00:35:02All right.

00:35:02how's the book coming coming along this is the point in the story where i ripped the couple

00:35:21apart and ruin everything they thought they knew about each other ouch can't they just be happy

00:35:27what's dramatic about happy my readers like the pain the torture makes them make up sex that much

00:35:36better you know my sister texted me she asked for your full author name so she could look you up

00:35:44really i warned you we are a family full of readers

00:35:49you're gonna laugh i was drunk when i came up with it

00:35:57my full pen name is mercedes lee loveletter

00:36:02what's your real last name it's smith

00:36:10also i write a lot of bdsm

00:36:16so does this mean we don't have to be awkward

00:36:23yeah friends good because as a friend i was wondering if you might be able to help me with

00:36:31some research for my next book what did you have in mind you're gonna throw your leg over

00:36:38but don't let your ankles touch this area here

00:36:40got it

00:36:41it'll make me feel better if you wear it it'll protect you a little

00:36:51okay get on

00:36:57okay you ready ready

00:37:12chika chika chika chika chika boom

00:37:22boom

00:37:29boom

00:37:37boom

00:37:39Chika chika chika-boom, chika boom, chika boom, chika chika chika, ta ra ra ra boom, yeah.

00:37:46Chika chika chika chika-boom, yeah, ta ra ra ra boom, yeah.

00:37:50Chika chika chika chika-boom, yeah.

00:37:52Ta ra ta ra ra boom, yeah.

00:37:55Chika chika chika-boom, yeah.

00:37:59God, that was incredible.

00:38:02You weren't scared?

00:38:03No. Was I supposed to be?

00:38:05My ex hated this thing.

00:38:06Yeah, this is a fool.

00:38:09I mean, I understand that motorcycles are dangerous,

00:38:12but the danger is what makes it exciting.

00:38:14You took the words right out of my mouth.

00:38:17Unfortunately, my ex liked a different kind of danger.

00:38:21Do you want to tell me what you mean by that,

00:38:23or do you want to say a word again?

00:38:26My ex loved the cheating kind of danger.

00:38:30Yikes.

00:38:33It wasn't just one guy.

00:38:34That's the hardest part.

00:38:36How you can bald-faced lie to someone you care about?

00:38:39That's not the fun kind of danger for me.

00:38:42Not at all.

00:38:45I'm so sorry.

00:38:47It's fine.

00:38:48I blame myself for not walking away sooner.

00:38:52She made me a jealous head case with baggage for days.

00:38:57Yeah.

00:38:58Jealousy is the worst.

00:39:00Although, I will tell you, from a writer's standpoint,

00:39:04readers love a possessive man.

00:39:06Is that right?

00:39:06So I should be thanking my ex for making me a possessive asshole?

00:39:10God, no.

00:39:11She sounds like too much of an asshole to get any credit for the man you are today.

00:39:16Well, your ex sounded like an asshole, too.

00:39:19I still can't believe he made you lie about your job to his family.

00:39:22Right?

00:39:22Why did we ever date them?

00:39:25I ask myself that all the time.

00:39:34I guess you could say that if we didn't go through all that,

00:39:37then we might not be here, enjoying this awesome view.

00:39:43You're missing something really beautiful.

00:39:45No, I'm not.

00:39:52I can't figure you out, Miles.

00:39:56I can't figure me out, either.

00:39:57How's it going?

00:40:14No way.

00:40:15You just finished?

00:40:15I just finished.

00:40:19Congratulations, Mercedes.

00:40:21Couldn't have done it without you, Miles.

00:40:23We should celebrate.

00:40:24Buy you a drink?

00:40:25Actually, I'm having a little The End party at my house on Friday.

00:40:30I want to come by.

00:40:32I'd love to.

00:40:33Great.

00:40:43Don't forget to call me Mercedes tonight.

00:40:45Mercedes!

00:40:46Woo!

00:40:47Say hi, everyone!

00:40:49Woo!

00:40:50Mercedes is doing a keg stand to celebrate finishing her book!

00:40:53What?

00:40:54No way!

00:40:55Mercedes is not doing a keg stand, because you made me buy that shitty IPA.

00:40:59Mercedes likes light beer and complimentary coffee and running sexpacks!

00:41:04Yeah!

00:41:05Woo!

00:41:06And a hard and fast wall set!

00:41:08Yeah!

00:41:09Woo!

00:41:10And a formal scene where a guy takes off a girl's panties and fingers them in his tuxedo pocket all night long!

00:41:16I was really specific for you!

00:41:17I was really specific for you!

00:41:18Yeah!

00:41:18Miles!

00:41:19Miles!

00:41:20I'm going to go get a drink.

00:41:21Uh, I'm going to follow that guy.

00:41:22I'm going to follow that guy.

00:41:24I'm Lindsay.

00:41:26Best friend and, uh, neighbor.

00:41:27There's my tiki bar over there.

00:41:27Can I get you something to drink?

00:41:28Miles!

00:41:29I'm Miles!

00:41:30Thanks!

00:41:31I'm good for now!

00:41:32Okay!

00:41:33I'm gonna follow those guys.

00:41:34Bye!

00:41:35Can we go somewhere and talk?

00:41:36Sure!

00:41:37Get out!

00:41:38Get out!

00:41:39Get out!

00:41:40Get out!

00:41:41Okay!

00:41:42You ready to go get some Santa?

00:41:43Hey, there's my tiki bar over there!

00:41:44Can I get you something to drink?

00:41:46I'm Miles.

00:41:47Thanks.

00:41:48I'm good for now.

00:41:49Okay!

00:41:50I'm gonna follow those guys.

00:41:51Yeah.

00:41:52Bye!

00:41:53Can we go somewhere and talk?

00:41:56Sure!

00:41:58How you doing?

00:42:00Could we go somewhere and talk?

00:42:01Sure.

00:42:02You have a roommate?

00:42:15Kind of.

00:42:16So it's a guy?

00:42:19Yes.

00:42:22Figures.

00:42:23It's not that Dean guy, right?

00:42:25You said he's your neighbor?

00:42:27He is my neighbor. It's not Dean.

00:42:30Then who is it?

00:42:32No one.

00:42:35I'm sorry. I should just go.

00:42:36My roommate, uh, is gay.

00:42:42Seriously?

00:42:45And he's out of town for the summer, so...

00:42:49Why are you acting like this?

00:42:53I thought you only wanted to be friends.

00:42:55It's a lot harder than I thought it would be.

00:43:09What can I do to help?

00:43:10I'm overprotective. I'm overbearing. Arrogant.

00:43:19Okay.

00:43:20Pretty much everything I do is in the extreme.

00:43:22I try not to be jealous. I do.

00:43:24She...

00:43:25I'm not her.

00:43:25I know you're not her.

00:43:28I just really need you to not do things to make me jealous.

00:43:30Why?

00:43:34Because it'll make me want to fuck you so you don't ever want to look at another guy again.

00:43:42Prove it.

00:43:44I hope you know what you're asking for, Ed.

00:43:50Mercedes.

00:43:51Mercedes.

00:43:53Mercedes.

00:43:54Mercedes.

00:43:55Mercedes.

00:43:56Mercedes.

00:43:57Mercedes.

00:43:58Mercedes.

00:44:06Shirt thief.

00:44:22I've been looking for this shirt for ten minutes.

00:44:23Are you in a pancake mood, or cut your arm off and run with?

00:44:30I could eat.

00:44:32Go sit down.

00:44:48I feel like I need to tell you that

00:44:52I didn't come here last night to do that.

00:44:57Okay.

00:44:58I mean, don't get me wrong, it was really good.

00:45:02Fucking great, actually.

00:45:03It was, wasn't it?

00:45:05But I just want you to know that wasn't my plan.

00:45:09Is this the part where you tell me that you're not in a position to like someone again?

00:45:15Maybe.

00:45:16That's fine.

00:45:19It is.

00:45:22This is no big deal, Miles.

00:45:24We had sex.

00:45:26You didn't ask me to go study.

00:45:28I'm not getting this twisted up.

00:45:33So you're good with this?

00:45:35Just being casual?

00:45:37Yeah.

00:45:39I'm a workaholic, so it's not like I have time to devote to a boyfriend.

00:45:42Though I might need your help with some book research.

00:45:51Book research?

00:45:52I thought you were done.

00:45:54Oh, how little you know about writing.

00:45:57Tire Depot was the easy stuff.

00:45:59I want help with the bedroom stuff.

00:46:03You write erotic novels.

00:46:06What more could you need to know?

00:46:09Okay.

00:46:10So for my new book, I want to write from a dual point of view.

00:46:14So one chapter will be in the female voice, and the next chapter will be in the male voice, and I'll alternate between the two.

00:46:21I know what dual point of view is, Mercedes.

00:46:24Okay.

00:46:25Sorry.

00:46:28So, I'm gonna need your help getting into the mind of a man.

00:46:34Should we start now?

00:46:35I'd hate to see your education suffer.

00:46:41Actually, since we're sticking with this whole friends with benefits thing, I was wondering if you could help me with a little project first.

00:46:50Like a naked kind of project?

00:46:53I mean, you can be naked if you want to, but it might not be safe.

00:46:57Could you help me move my roommate's shit downstairs and into a moving pod?

00:47:07Absolutely.

00:47:09Friends have to earn their benefits sometimes.

00:47:14Thanks.

00:47:16Oh my god.

00:47:17Hannah.

00:47:18I have entered into a casual friends with benefits situation with a mechanic from Tire Depot who thinks my name is Mercedes.

00:47:24Wait, this is actually happening to you? Like in real life?

00:47:26Yes! And I like him way more than just a friend, so I'm in crisis mode. What do I do?

00:47:32Besides phone him every chance you get?

00:47:34Yeah, I mean, my alter ego's taking the reins here.

00:47:37I fully understand.

00:47:39And I've kind of been avoiding him this week to sort of play cool so that he doesn't know that I like him.

00:47:43Which you do.

00:47:44Yes! But I don't want him to know that.

00:47:47I mean, is this relationship worth me telling him my real name? Or is it just sex?

00:47:51Are you done?

00:47:52I could use some sage advice here.

00:47:54Listen to me.

00:47:55Here's what you're gonna do.

00:47:56You are gonna go camping.

00:47:59Camping?

00:48:00Camping.

00:48:02Why?

00:48:03Kate Outdoors, you guys love that shit.

00:48:05Just tell him it's for book research and you need his help.

00:48:08Ooh, that's good because I actually use that excuse.

00:48:10Perfect.

00:48:11You're going to be adorable and fumbling and not know how to cast a fishing pole and he's going to realize how much fun it is to go camping and get to fuck in a tent.

00:48:20By the end of the trip, you'll know if you need to fish or cut bait.

00:48:23Hmm.

00:48:24You should be a writer.

00:48:25Oh.

00:48:26Anna, this is good.

00:48:27You're a genius.

00:48:28I'm going camping.

00:48:29Just, um, let me know where I have the pizza delivered to.

00:48:32Ha ha, bish.

00:48:33Hey, Kate.

00:48:34You here for a cronut?

00:48:35You know it.

00:48:36It's going to be a hot minute before the new batch is ready, but go ahead and take a number and we'll bring them right out.

00:48:40I'll take two and a cup of coffee.

00:48:42You got it.

00:48:47My dick misses you.

00:48:49Your dick is insatiable.

00:48:51Are you dry hooping me?

00:48:52Uh huh.

00:48:54Tell me what you're thinking.

00:48:56I want you naked and in a bed now.

00:48:59How are the words flowing?

00:49:01Not as good as the other night.

00:49:02You are soaking.

00:49:03You're at the bakery.

00:49:04I could think of something else I'd rather be eating.

00:49:07Let me take care of you.

00:49:09It's Mont Reiner.

00:49:14Feeling inspired?

00:49:16Five thousand words in three hours.

00:49:19It's Tire Depot magic right there.

00:49:23Maybe it's Miles Hudson magic.

00:49:25Oh, Jesus! Say hi, Dean.

00:49:35Ugh.

00:49:36I was literally standing there for almost five minutes.

00:49:38I'm reading my texts.

00:49:41So, what is so important that you had to see me?

00:49:44I don't know what you mean.

00:49:47We do this every week.

00:49:49Yeah.

00:49:51But you've never texted me three times the day of

00:49:53to make sure that I was coming.

00:49:56I take grown-ups very seriously.

00:49:59Dean.

00:50:03I saw his truck outside your place a couple nights ago.

00:50:05Who's truck?

00:50:07Miles. Who else?

00:50:09How do you know it was his truck?

00:50:12Because I don't know any other guys in Boulder

00:50:14who would drive a beastly vehicle like that.

00:50:17Oh, my God. You're such a snob.

00:50:20So, he spent the night?

00:50:22What, did you come back and check in the morning?

00:50:26Maybe.

00:50:28Stop worrying.

00:50:29Stop worrying.

00:50:31We're just fooling around.

00:50:32It's nothing serious.

00:50:33See, that is exactly what I'm worried about.

00:50:37The guy rejected you once already.

00:50:39Thank you for reminding me.

00:50:41Any guy that jerks you around like that is an idiot.

00:50:44He's not an idiot.

00:50:46He's a mechanic at a tire depot.

00:50:47How bright can he be?

00:50:49Are you kidding me?

00:50:51Hey, just calm down.

00:50:53Coming from a high school dropout.

00:50:55I got my GED.

00:50:57And I am self-educated.

00:50:58In what?

00:51:00Being an asshat?

00:51:02I surround myself

00:51:04with people who are inclusive

00:51:06and non-judgmental because I have a weird job.

00:51:09I don't want judgy friends in my corner

00:51:11because that would make me a hypocrite.

00:51:14And Miles is so encouraging about what I do.

00:51:17More encouraging than you have ever been.

00:51:20And he's not dumb.

00:51:22At all.

00:51:23He's actually really fucking insightful

00:51:25and you might see that

00:51:26if you quit looking down your nose at people.

00:51:30Wait, just don't go Kate.

00:51:31No, I'm sorry.

00:51:33But if you're gonna start acting like this

00:51:34then I don't see how we can continue to be friends.

00:51:37Kate.

00:51:38I like you.

00:51:39Yeah, well I liked you too until you started acting like a douche nozzle.

00:51:48No, I mean...

00:51:50I really like you.

00:51:52And I...

00:51:54Oh shit.

00:51:55I don't think it's something I can ignore anymore.

00:51:57In...

00:51:58How long?

00:52:01How long?

00:52:04Couple years.

00:52:06But I was with Lindsay and you were with that douchebag Dryston.

00:52:10Why didn't you tell me?

00:52:12I didn't want to be a rebound.

00:52:14You're hooking up with a guy who still doesn't even know your real name.

00:52:17How do you think that's gonna end?

00:52:19He wants it casual.

00:52:22But I want the whole thing.

00:52:23The good.

00:52:24The bad.

00:52:25All of it.

00:52:27I'm sorry, Dean.

00:52:30But I just don't feel the same way.

00:52:33But you are one of my best friends and I don't want to change that.

00:52:39I need you to go.

00:52:44But why?

00:52:46We all have our own little places.

00:52:50And this is my tire depot.

00:52:53Please.

00:53:00I am sorry, Dean.

00:53:09Hey.

00:53:14Who's that?

00:53:16A carburetor.

00:53:19What does it do?

00:53:22Um, kind of a lot.

00:53:24Do you really want to know?

00:53:26Yes.

00:53:28Well, it mixes the proper ratio of gas and air inside of an engine for combustion to occur.

00:53:35Nowadays most cars have fuel injectors but the classics still run on these puppies.

00:53:40Interesting.

00:53:42It's kind of like how a candle needs oxygen to burn.

00:53:47Combustion of an engine can't take place without the air the carburetor brings in.

00:53:54Kind of like how an orgasm can't be achieved without friction.

00:54:02Sure.

00:54:04You could draw that parallel.

00:54:05I would like to draw that parallel soon.

00:54:09Did you have something in mind?

00:54:14Watch your step up here.

00:54:16Whoop!

00:54:19Miles is so good.

00:54:21Miles, this is perfect.

00:54:23I didn't know girls could be this excited about camping.

00:54:25Well, don't judge a book by its cover, mister.

00:54:29Look.

00:54:31There's a path that leads right to the water.

00:54:33Perfect.

00:54:35Come on.

00:54:36We got work to do.

00:54:37Gotta set up camp.

00:54:38Let's go.

00:54:39This looks brand new.

00:54:40Yeah.

00:54:41I just do a sleeping bag usually.

00:54:43So you bought this for me?

00:54:44It's not only for you.

00:54:46This will save my knees big time.

00:54:49You are such a horny bastard.

00:54:51Says the smut rider.

00:54:52Yeah. I just do a sleeping bag, usually.

00:54:56So you bought this for me?

00:54:57It's not only for you.

00:55:00This will save my knees big time.

00:55:03You are such a horny bastard.

00:55:05Says the smut writer.

00:55:07Mm-hmm.

00:55:18Seriously?

00:55:20Seriously.

00:55:22Take your shorts off.

00:55:30I figured you were thirsty.

00:55:32We've earned these.

00:55:34Yeah, camping is hard.

00:55:44Mountain air suits you.

00:55:47I'm just in a good mood.

00:55:49It's amazing how much nicer life is with no drama.

00:55:51Do you ever talk to your ex?

00:55:57Not a word.

00:55:59And that's good.

00:55:59You never told me how you found out she was cheating on you.

00:56:05She got pregnant.

00:56:07With some rich old guy's kid.

00:56:10We were on a break at the time.

00:56:13Wow.

00:56:14The layers.

00:56:19Do you think that she got pregnant on purpose?

00:56:21Do you think that she got pregnant on purpose?

00:56:22No.

00:56:25Yes.

00:56:27I don't know.

00:56:27Probably.

00:56:28I have to wonder what kind of a fuck would I was to not really realize.

00:56:32She was always money obsessed.

00:56:35Thought being a mechanic was too blue color.

00:56:37Wanted me to make more money.

00:56:40You seem like you're doing just fine to me.

00:56:43See?

00:56:44I'm just pissed off I wasted the best years of my life with her.

00:56:49Who said they were the best years?

00:56:51Look around you, Miles.

00:56:53It's a pretty beautiful day.

00:56:56You want for nothing.

00:56:57That is an incredible quality in a person.

00:57:03And, I mean, look at you.

00:57:04You're smoking hot.

00:57:05You got a great job, house, friends.

00:57:09Really sexy fuck buddy.

00:57:15So don't sweat the past.

00:57:18Focus on the now.

00:57:20Seriously, right now, my bobber disappeared several minutes ago and I don't know it.

00:57:24Shit, you got a bite.

00:57:30Are you kidding me?

00:57:32I got a bicycle tire.

00:57:34What the hell, Colorado?

00:57:37Way to keep it classy.

00:57:38My hands hurt.

00:57:40Surely you can see the irony in this.

00:57:43Babe, you got a tire.

00:57:45This is kids.

00:58:03Truth or dare.

00:58:04Truth.

00:58:08Do you ever get horny in the garage at Tire Depot?

00:58:11What?

00:58:14You're working on a customer's car and your hands are getting really dirty and you're just really...

00:58:20digging in there and you just...

00:58:26I'm afraid not.

00:58:27I'm afraid not.

00:58:31Damn.

00:58:37But, classic car work on the other hand, if I'm working on one of those and an old car that hasn't run in fucking decades and suddenly roars to life, then hell yes.

00:58:48That's rock solid.

00:58:49Rock solid.

00:58:50I knew it.

00:58:52Perverts attract perverts.

00:58:54I knew it.

00:58:55I knew it.

00:58:56Perverts attract perverts.

00:58:57Perverts attract perverts.

00:59:01I knew it.

00:59:02Don't worry about me.

00:59:03I was very worried about king.

00:59:04Okay, truth or dare?

00:59:10Dare.

00:59:11Ooh, somebody has secrets.

00:59:12Shut up.

00:59:15Skinny dip in the lake.

00:59:18The lake that birthed my blessed tiger.

00:59:20No way.

00:59:21Who knows what the hell else is in that thing.

00:59:24It's fine.

00:59:25I knew you wouldn't do it.

00:59:27All talk and no action.

00:59:31Um, need I remind you

00:59:34who has been sneaking into Tire Depot for weeks now.

00:59:38You call that dangerous?

00:59:39I am consuming complimentary beverages

00:59:42without service miles.

00:59:44That is just as bad as thieving.

00:59:47Such a cold, hard criminal.

00:59:50Fine, I'll do it.

00:59:52But you have to do it with me.

00:59:54And why would I do that?

00:59:56Because I'll be naked.

01:00:04No!

01:00:09Woo-hoo!

01:00:10Woo-hoo!

01:00:10Whoa!

01:00:36Mercedes?

01:00:40Do you feel like...

01:00:43Do you feel that?

01:00:44Feel what?

01:00:46Oh my god, that's freezing!

01:01:10Good morning.

01:01:20Morning.

01:01:21Morning.

01:01:22You've been busy this morning.

01:01:36Yeah.

01:01:37It's a muddy mess, so I figured we should head back early.

01:01:40Oh, okay.

01:01:46What can I do to help?

01:01:52I forgot the pancake mix.

01:01:54Don't read into that.

01:01:56Well, thanks for the help with the research.

01:02:00Anytime.

01:02:01You okay?

01:02:02I'm just tired.

01:02:03Shouldn't have gotten the mattress pad.

01:02:05Hmm.

01:02:06Hmm.

01:02:07Hmm.

01:02:08Well, thanks for the help with the research.

01:02:11Anytime.

01:02:12You okay?

01:02:13I'm just tired.

01:02:14Shouldn't have gotten the mattress pad.

01:02:15Hmm.

01:02:16Looks like you got company.

01:02:17I'll see you later, Mercedes.

01:02:18Okay.

01:02:19Bye.

01:02:21Bye!

01:02:22Okay.

01:02:23Okay.

01:02:24Bye!

01:02:25you okay i'm just tired shouldn't have gotten the mattress pad

01:02:34looks like you got company

01:02:38i'll see you later mercedes okay bye

01:02:50hi dean hey kate

01:02:55want to come in for some coffee is it complimentary

01:03:02for people who aren't assholes it is

01:03:10nothing to say about that loud muffler on miles's truck surprised you know what a muffler is

01:03:17i'm learning i am too i'm really sorry kate

01:03:26come on in then

01:03:31did you spend the night at miles's house last night

01:03:34are you really asking that i'm just making small talk kate i promise no judgment

01:03:39we were camping camping it was for book research and it was really fun writing something different

01:03:50trying to inspiration must be flowing it has its moments and miles is the guy that brings this out

01:03:59in you he's certainly not hurting things so different from me

01:04:08dean look i never had a clue that you had feelings for me if i had i would have done so many things

01:04:15differently like what i don't know maybe come over less often

01:04:24i'm sorry if i led you to believe otherwise

01:04:26no no you were just being yourself it's pretty magnetic

01:04:34weird to get a compliment from someone you just rejected

01:04:41i think that if you really like him you need to come clean start by telling him your real name and

01:04:46end with the fact that you still live with your ex kate the longer you wait the harder it'll be

01:04:51but i moved his stuff out at least if he really cares he'll forgive you i'm telling you this as your

01:04:59friend so we're still friends only if i can still wear my fancy pants done we've been here five minutes how

01:05:10much longer do you need it's a tire how long can it take just checking the warranty sir uh if for

01:05:17some reason your tire isn't repairable we have why can't my tire be repaired well if there's a puncture

01:05:22in the sidewall those aren't fixable unfortunately so we'd have to go what a ripoff who's the manager

01:05:29i want to talk to them right now bro who's that chick she's a customer service ref perfect

01:05:36we'll take her i'm afraid you don't get to pick

01:05:42yeah i think we could if we wanted to hey this isn't ordering a girl off the internet moron

01:05:49do you want your tire fixed or not buddy manager now just go back to the shop i'll let my uncle deal

01:05:57with these guys okay yeah why don't you go back to the shop and let your boy talk to this out what kind

01:06:03of business are you running whoa whoa whoa what'd that licorice ever do to you

01:06:17nothing

01:06:20what's going on with you you look ready to rip someone's head off

01:06:24nice dress

01:06:36you like it

01:06:40so long as you don't twirl in it

01:06:41what is wrong with you nothing just some entitled customers getting on my nerves

01:06:56do me a favor and don't go into the customer comfort center today okay sure

01:07:00would me going over to yours tonight cheer you up tonight after work maybe i want to see your house

01:07:11specifically your garage you know research get your hands dirty fine

01:07:23wow moody's kind of hot on you

01:07:26oh my god miles this is stunning 1965 ford pickup got the paint done last month interior last week

01:07:43all she needs now is a new carburetor for combustion you remember that

01:07:48the orgasm of the engine well it might take a while i can't find the right one to save my life

01:07:59they're pretty rare and expensive you said it was your grandpa's looks like it belongs in a pixar film

01:08:09yeah he passed away two years ago

01:08:13i'm so sorry to hear that he was 77 so he had a solid run thought he was gonna live forever

01:08:28hey he always kept little candies in the glove box you want one oh no no those were your grandpa's

01:08:37they should stay where they are

01:08:43i wish i had it running already

01:08:48it was sort of a dying promise i made to him joss always got pissed at me when i worked on this truck

01:08:55i feel bad i haven't finished it yet

01:08:59miles

01:09:01look at this thing it's art and you've already done so much to it

01:09:09he would have loved you

01:09:10oh yeah

01:09:13yeah you're real

01:09:18you don't put on a show for people

01:09:21everything you say is exactly what you are

01:09:25he would have loved your name too

01:09:27mercedes

01:09:29hot cars

01:09:32well

01:09:40well

01:09:48i'm

01:09:49you

01:09:49i'm

01:09:50i'm

01:09:50you

01:09:50i'm

01:09:51i'm

01:09:52i'm

01:09:53i'm

01:09:53Just the same thing the other day.

01:10:15Anyway, we were on leave.

01:10:23Honey, I'm home.

01:10:25Oh, shit.

01:10:27Dryston.

01:10:29Hi, Katie.

01:10:31Give us a hug.

01:10:33Best entrepreneurs in the state of Colorado.

01:10:35That's right, ma'am.

01:10:37Dude, are you even listening to me?

01:10:40Yeah, sorry.

01:10:42Your uncle wants to see you buy him out.

01:10:44That's fucking awesome.

01:10:45It's awesome for both of us.

01:10:49I want you by my side.

01:10:53Maybe his manager or fucking parts director.

01:10:58Maybe you can even open that vintage car garage under the Tire Depot umbrella.

01:11:04Work on classic cars more often.

01:11:07Put your granddad's truck in our showroom.

01:11:09Damn!

01:11:10We'd have everything under one roof.

01:11:13Tires, auto repair, antique car restorations.

01:11:17I'm getting hard just thinking about it.

01:11:21I guess that wouldn't suck.

01:11:24Come on, man!

01:11:26I thought this would cheer you up.

01:11:28It is.

01:11:29It does.

01:11:30I'm happy for you.

01:11:32It's just...

01:11:34Mercedes hasn't texted me back in days and that's unlike her.

01:11:40You're pining after your fuck buddy.

01:11:43She's not a fuck buddy.

01:11:45Watch how you fucking speak about her.

01:11:47I'm not joking.

01:11:48Okay.

01:11:49But don't let that girl get in your head and force you to miss out on a great opportunity.

01:12:01Come on.

01:12:03Let's go celebrate.

01:12:05Mmm.

01:12:06Mmm.

01:12:07Mmm.

01:12:08Mmm.

01:12:09Dryston is back.

01:12:11Shut up.

01:12:12What did you say?

01:12:14I told him that his stuff is in storage.

01:12:17I was changing the locks.

01:12:18I'll pay him the deposit and that I'm not moving.

01:12:22Good for you.

01:12:24You finally got Dryston out of your life for good and it was about damn time.

01:12:28Now I just have to come clean to miles about many.

01:12:33Mmm.

01:12:34Mmm.

01:12:35I've been avoiding him until this Dryston stuff got sorted.

01:12:40Real life is so much more complicated than fiction.

01:12:44I just want a real life romance.

01:12:46You got this.

01:12:47I've got nothing except a full bladder.

01:12:50I'm gonna go pee and get us refills.

01:12:52Yes, please.

01:12:57Mmm.

01:13:00God damn, Katie.

01:13:02Did you look this good when I left?

01:13:05Did you follow me here?

01:13:07I didn't have to.

01:13:08It's her favorite spot.

01:13:09Oh, this is so typical.

01:13:11What?

01:13:12You come crawling into town and think that you can get whatever you want.

01:13:17What?

01:13:18I don't remember your tits looking this good.

01:13:22I need a refresher.

01:13:23Don't be a pig, Dryston.

01:13:25Don't be a bitch, Katie.

01:13:31Hey, what's up, bro?

01:13:34Dude, long time no see.

01:13:35How you been?

01:13:36Oh my gosh.

01:13:37Yeah.

01:13:42Miles, what are you doing here?

01:13:44I'm here with my buddy.

01:13:45What about you?

01:13:46Oh, I'm here with Kate.

01:13:47What are the odds?

01:13:49Who's Kate?

01:13:53Fuck.

01:13:55I said your stuff is in storage, Dryston.

01:13:58You can be a real bitch, you know that?

01:13:59What the fuck did you just call her?

01:14:00Excuse you?

01:14:01Excuse you.

01:14:02I won't ask again.

01:14:03This conversation has nothing to do with you, wrenchhead.

01:14:04Dryston.

01:14:05You were the asshole at Tire Depot the other day.

01:14:07You know this fuckwit, Mercedes?

01:14:08You think her name is Mercedes?

01:14:11I was gonna tell you everything.

01:14:12Tell me what?

01:14:13Who the fuck is this guy?

01:14:14He's no one.

01:14:15He's no one.

01:14:16He's no one.

01:14:17He's no one.

01:14:18He's no one.

01:14:19He's no one.

01:14:20He's no one.

01:14:21He's no one.

01:14:22He's no one.

01:14:23He's no one.

01:14:24I was gonna tell you everything.

01:14:26Tell me what?

01:14:27Who the fuck is this guy?

01:14:28He's no one.

01:14:29No, no.

01:14:30I just live with you.

01:14:31This is your gay roommate?

01:14:33I didn't fuck her like I was gay.

01:14:36Miles, please let me explain.

01:14:38Ooh.

01:14:39Yeah, Katie.

01:14:40Why don't you explain?

01:14:41Why is he calling you Katie?

01:14:43Cause that's her real name, moron.

01:14:45Mercedes is basically the hooker name.

01:14:47She made up to write those stupid, trashy books.

01:14:50Call her fucking name again and you will regret it.

01:14:52Miles, don't.

01:14:53No, no.

01:14:54You can have the trashy cunt.

01:14:55She's not suitable for mixed company anyway.

01:14:58Oh.

01:14:59Oh.

01:15:00Oh.

01:15:01Oh.

01:15:02Oh.

01:15:03Oh.

01:15:04Oh.

01:15:12Miles, I can explain.

01:15:13Don't talk to me.

01:15:14Miles, I need to explain.

01:15:15What, Mercedes?

01:15:16Or is it Katie?

01:15:18It's Kate.

01:15:19Explain why I punched a guy in the face for a girl whose name I don't even know.

01:15:22I was going to tell you.

01:15:23After I fell in love with you?

01:15:25I'm still the same person, Miles.

01:15:26I am just as much Mercedes as I am Kate.

01:15:27Then why fucking lie about it?

01:15:28I don't know.

01:15:29Because with my ex, I got used to hiding that part of myself.

01:15:30But with you, I have never had to, not once.

01:15:31Kate Smith is who I am when I'm not telling people what I do.

01:15:35And what happened with your sister?

01:15:36That's something that's never happened to me before.

01:15:37You lied to me.

01:15:38Even when you knew about my past.

01:15:39You had plenty of chances to open up.

01:15:40Do you know what a fucking idiot I feel like for calling Mercedes all this time?

01:15:42Every time we had sex.

01:15:43I'm a joke to you.

01:15:44You are not a joke.

01:15:45I am.

01:15:46I am.

01:15:47I'm sorry.

01:15:48I got carried away.

01:15:49I liked you so much.

01:15:50I liked you.

01:15:51I am.

01:15:52And I am.

01:15:53I'm sorry.

01:15:54I got carried away.

01:15:55I liked you so much.

01:15:56I'm sorry.

01:15:57I'm so sorry.

01:15:58I'm sorry.

01:15:59But up at my age, I would probably talk to you.

01:16:01You are all the same, you're all the same.

01:16:04And that's something that's never happened to me before.

01:16:05I mean, that's something that's never happened to me before.

01:16:08You lied to me.

01:16:10Even when you knew about my past, you had plenty of chances to open up.

01:16:11Do you know what a fucking idiot I feel like for calling Mercedes all this time.

01:16:18so much i've always liked you as more than friends with benefits and i thought that i could be this

01:16:24cool casual mercedes with no strings attached but the truth is is that i am just plain old boring

01:16:30kate smith who is totally falling for you miles hudson how can i even trust you

01:16:38you're just as bad as my ex i'm out kate mercedes whoever you are

01:16:44you can keep your drama your lies keep living your life as your author name your real name with

01:16:50your boyfriend your ex-gay boyfriend this is officially the end of our story

01:17:02it's been two weeks oh stop he was upset you made him feel like a fool he'll get over it he's not

01:17:09returning any of my calls that's because you haven't made your grand gesture yet

01:17:13grand gesture mm-hmm it's really good dean thank you what grand gesture kate you write this stuff

01:17:22now you have to live it you need to make a grand gesture that shows your hero that you care deeply

01:17:28wow you know that you up royally you still know him you know him and care about him and the grandness of

01:17:34this gesture proves it wow that was a mouthful she's right kate he cares about you but it's gotta be big

01:17:41big any ideas

01:17:54no turn no turn the map is wrong we lost service like 10 minutes ago

01:18:07not loaded

01:18:20Right there, right there!

01:18:28We'll be right here.

01:18:30You got this.

01:18:50Mom's worried about you.

01:18:58What?

01:18:59You haven't emailed in two weeks. You know you do it like clockwork.

01:19:02Why are you calling so early?

01:19:05Is Joss there?

01:19:07No. Why would you think that?

01:19:10I don't know. Mom and I thought you might have gotten back together and didn't want to tell us.

01:19:15It's not Joss. I've been seeing that author girl.

01:19:19Oh man, I didn't realize you were seeing her.

01:19:21I'm not. I mean, I was, but it's over now.

01:19:26Why?

01:19:27Because she lied to me about some shit.

01:19:29And I'm not bringing that noise back into my life.

01:19:32Been there, done that.

01:19:34Don't think that every girl that isn't perfect is like Jocelyn.

01:19:38Look, I don't know this girl, but I do know you.

01:19:41And you sounded so crazy happy that night you called me to talk about her.

01:19:45I was.

01:19:46Dude, I called mom the very next day to tell her about how different you sounded.

01:19:51We were excited.

01:19:52Seriously?

01:19:54Yeah, Joss was the worst. You were moody for years.

01:19:58This girl makes you happy? True or false?

01:20:00True.

01:20:01Then sometimes a little noise in your life is a good thing.

01:20:05When did you get so fucking insightful?

01:20:10When I started waking up earlier.

01:20:24Grand gesture.

01:20:26This can't be from your caddy.

01:20:39It's not.

01:20:41It's the carburetor that Miles needs to get his grandpa's truck running.

01:20:45Could you give it to him but not tell him it's for me, please?

01:20:50Are you kidding me?

01:20:51This thing costs a shitload of money.

01:20:53Where'd you find it?

01:20:55A Scottish footballer named Mac who lives in a creepy house in the mountains.

01:21:00What?

01:21:02Anyway, why don't you give it to him yourself?

01:21:05Because I don't want him back like that.

01:21:13Kate.

01:21:14Yeah?

01:21:15You know Miles paid my uncle every single week you were here, right?

01:21:23He what?

01:21:25My uncle owns this place.

01:21:28And Miles worked out a deal with him to look the other way when you came in all the time.

01:21:33Thought I was flying under the radar.

01:21:36No.

01:21:38Definitely not.

01:21:40Total Brooke boyfriend moment.

01:21:42What?

01:21:45Nothing.

01:21:47Where's Miles?

01:21:49Outside, stacking tires.

01:21:52Go put him out of his misery.

01:21:54Are you sure?

01:21:55Yes.

01:21:56Please, for the love of God, go.

01:22:03What are you doing here?

01:22:16Do you know what this is?

01:22:20Looks like a carburetor.

01:22:24Do you know for what kind of vehicle?

01:22:28I can't tell from here.

01:22:33It's a 1965 Ford F100.

01:22:45Where did you get it?

01:22:48It's kind of a long, crazy story that included a rattlesnake.

01:22:56But I'm hoping it has a great ending.

01:22:59What kind of ending?

01:23:03The kind where you let me apologize for lying.

01:23:07I'm not your ex, Miles.

01:23:10I am Kate Smith.

01:23:12From Longmont, Colorado, whose ex technically still lived with her until she changed the locks on him.

01:23:23Who is not some brave, erotic romance author who's cool with kink and casual relationships and using a mechanic for book research.

01:23:36I am just a girl who's been falling in love with a guy who works at Tire Depot, who would really just like to go home with him and take a freaking shower.