- 9 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Ellen musk the only woman on the Forbes 30 under 30 list arrives at Atlanta today what a business
00:00:10tycoon is doing here in Georgia a forgotten stage no one knows Angela my next-door neighbor still
00:00:17selling your hippie junk here if your mother-in-law sees she's gonna throw a big fit again your
00:00:24mother-in-law was right about you what's the point of watching the news all day about these
00:00:28moggles if you can't even apply to your penniless self and how do you know that this is none of my
00:00:33business all right everybody get out we got an important guest coming you deaf I said pack up
00:00:49and scram I paid the stall fee already and if you want me to leave then fine but you have to
00:00:55compensate for today's losses I'm gonna say that again you know who's visiting today Ellen
00:01:04freaking musk one of the richest people in the world Ellen musk of course a hick like you probably
00:01:09never heard of her just know that you can't afford to piss her off really Ellen musk is flying all the
00:01:17way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market you don't think that she could be coming to see
00:01:24me coming to see you all right oh you know what I'll play your game if she does it so much as give
00:01:33you a glance I'll I'll eat dirt deal Ellen musk get to the flea market within 10 minutes or else you're fired
00:02:03prepare the limo miss lockhart requires us immediately oh you're 10 minutes you're so messed up good hope you
00:02:24don't wet your pants five four three two one
00:02:35Ellen I mean miss musk Ellen I mean I'm sorry that I sorry to frighten you
00:02:46what how's my boss bitch kick an ass girlfriend so how do you like she's my boss and I prefer business
00:02:58partner or best friend no way well no no no I'm sorry for defending your boss no I won't do it again
00:03:13all right that's enough we're not tyrants here
00:03:19sir I found Angela Lockhart
00:03:28you mean Angela Lockhart
00:03:35my runaway pride
00:03:37you made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker
00:03:43who are you where is she Atlanta and you were right it was secretly her propping up
00:03:52Ellen musk my clever bride I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to
00:03:56Max prep the jet I'm heading to Atlanta
00:04:04Atlanta the game is afoot I'm going wait dr. Wilson the Prince of Bhutan needs your medical
00:04:19he can't wait I need to pick up my bride
00:04:21but dr. Wilson
00:04:26General Eisenhower reporting
00:04:33David Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta
00:04:37Atlanta
00:04:39where is that
00:04:41whatever prepare my war plate
00:04:44those who are going after my fiance
00:04:46this is war
00:04:51I've secretly allowed your husband Jared Cooper to win the bid on the maple plaza project like you asked me to
00:05:10thank you so much Ellen this is going to be the best anniversary gift ever
00:05:14that project is worth billions he can finally take his company public
00:05:18but Angela
00:05:20my boss
00:05:22I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity
00:05:28without your backing
00:05:31no offense but he's nothing without you
00:05:33well
00:05:34three years ago
00:05:36you saved me
00:05:57he saved me and I fell in love with him instantly
00:06:04I didn't want to reveal my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress
00:06:11but now with this contract I feel like we'll be on more equal footing and then I can finally come out to the public
00:06:18so that's why you have me secretly helping him
00:06:21I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out
00:06:24but why work at the flea market
00:06:28are you disguising yourself to test him
00:06:32well these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find
00:06:38plus I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom
00:06:42you seem happy being a housewife
00:06:44where the hell are you
00:06:49don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again
00:06:52get home stacked
00:06:54it's a big day today
00:06:58that was
00:06:59my mother-in-law Carol
00:07:01she judges me because she thinks I come from a lower class family
00:07:04but she's gonna be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am
00:07:09you know she even remembered our third year anniversary
00:07:13please spend more time with my son
00:07:23hi I'm home
00:07:25I have a big announcement I have to make
00:07:27finally you're back
00:07:29now sign the divorce papers
00:07:31is this some sort of misunderstanding mom
00:07:37oh god
00:07:39don't call me mom again
00:07:41we're ending that relationship
00:07:43just look at you dirt all over
00:07:46you're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper
00:07:48you don't deserve my son
00:07:50you're way below his league
00:07:52I'm below his league?
00:07:54that's right
00:07:56you are
00:07:58Jared is signing a hundred billion dollar contract tomorrow with THE Ellen Musk
00:08:04and then his company's going public
00:08:06that's how much he's accomplished in three years
00:08:09but you
00:08:10you're still just
00:08:12a stinky hippie peddler
00:08:14Jared's like the king in the clouds
00:08:17and you
00:08:18you
00:08:20will always just be a pawn
00:08:22like dirt
00:08:25on our shoes
00:08:28dirt on your shoes
00:08:30but
00:08:31Ellen Musk works for me
00:08:33you're delusional
00:08:35you will never upgrade to a queen
00:08:37how dare you compare yourself to the real deal here
00:08:43resorting to lies
00:08:45definitely not good enough for Jared
00:08:47and
00:08:48who are you
00:08:49to come into my house
00:08:51and meddle with my family matters
00:08:55you're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife
00:09:00Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee
00:09:02not a lowlife dirtbag
00:09:04enough
00:09:05Jared
00:09:07I knew you wouldn't divorce me
00:09:10but I am
00:09:11don't fight it Angela
00:09:14here's 500k
00:09:16you'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices
00:09:20now sign the papers
00:09:22take a check
00:09:23and leave
00:09:24don't embarrass yourself further
00:09:25I've done so much for you these past three years
00:09:31did that not mean anything to you?
00:09:34didn't expect you to be so greedy
00:09:37fine
00:09:39here's another 200,000
00:09:41500,000 is too much for her already
00:09:44she's done nothing
00:09:46hasn't even contributed a grandchild
00:09:49she just sells cheap grass all day
00:09:52is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:09:55I took care of both of you these past three years
00:09:59you think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something
00:10:05and she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench
00:10:09a hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO
00:10:13what a joke
00:10:15if you actually love my son
00:10:17you'll sign the damn divorce papers already
00:10:20and leave
00:10:22you really think that Jared would have gotten that Mabel Plaza bid without me?
00:10:28let alone taking the company public
00:10:31I did everything for you Jared
00:10:34now you take credit for my son's success?
00:10:40it's all my work
00:10:43baby
00:10:45we're gonna be late for the auction
00:10:47if we keep letting this psycho stall us
00:10:51you did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:10:56so
00:10:58she's the reason for the divorce
00:11:00she's worth more than you Angela
00:11:03fine
00:11:06I'll sign it
00:11:08but don't regret it
00:11:10regret?
00:11:13do you know who I am?
00:11:15yeah
00:11:16a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed
00:11:19I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter
00:11:22Jared winning the bid on Maple Plaza was because of my dad
00:11:28because he's business partners with Ellen Musk
00:11:31it's part of the power I have as an elite
00:11:36you can't do shit because you're poor
00:11:40social stratum matters
00:11:42yeah
00:11:44social stratum does matter
00:11:46and the Coopers
00:11:48are beneath me
00:11:50and you really think Ellen Musk
00:11:52would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:11:55ha!
00:11:56you're delusional
00:11:57now sign the papers and scram!
00:12:01you owe me
00:12:05you dirty bitch
00:12:07you sicken me
00:12:15you hit me
00:12:19now sign the papers
00:12:20take your check
00:12:21and get the fuck out
00:12:35I don't need your penny money
00:12:39we're finished
00:12:42you don't want the money that's your loss
00:12:44your check is just pennies to me
00:12:48but
00:12:49I would like my ring back
00:12:51have fun
00:13:01on your economy flight
00:13:03while I catch her out on my private helicopter out of here
00:13:11and I'm way out of your league
00:13:18isn't that the Winston blue diamond ring?
00:13:22it's worth tens of millions of dollars
00:13:25oh it's probably just cheap glass
00:13:28something she found at the flea market
00:13:31you're right
00:13:33she could never afford anything so expensive
00:13:37congrats Jared Vuvu
00:13:39on getting rid of that dirt bag
00:13:41oh!
00:13:43my dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit
00:13:48bigger big shot than Ellen Musk?
00:13:52yeah
00:13:54and nobody's met them
00:13:55but I can introduce you
00:13:56oh
00:13:58everything's thanks to you babe
00:14:00uh Angela?
00:14:03Mr. Vanderbilt
00:14:04the richest man in Georgia
00:14:06wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding
00:14:07Vanderbilt?
00:14:08yeah he's actually CEO of one of our companies
00:14:11basically our employee
00:14:13oh okay I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow
00:14:14it's fine
00:14:15well you're still going to the summit tomorrow?
00:14:17but you and Jared Cooper are already divorced
00:14:19that's exactly why I'm going
00:14:21that's exactly why I'm going
00:14:35Angela Lockhart.
00:14:58I finally found you.
00:15:02Who is he?
00:15:03That, that's Devin Sterling.
00:15:07He's number one on Forbes 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling
00:15:12Enterprises.
00:15:13Rumor has that he's worth trillions, and he's your fiancé.
00:15:19What?
00:15:20What?
00:15:21My fiancé?
00:15:22The one and only.
00:15:25So after running away and leaving me single for three years, have you figured out how you're
00:15:32going to make it up to me yet?
00:15:33Babe?
00:15:34That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:15:48What is she doing here?
00:15:51You skank.
00:15:52My son just divorced you yesterday, and you're already hooking up with another man.
00:15:58Divorced?
00:15:59That's right.
00:16:00So I guess this was never meant to be Mr. Sterling.
00:16:05Devin Sterling.
00:16:06So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:16:15Guess she's not just a forsaken woman.
00:16:18She's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:16:23How dare you insult my boss like that?
00:16:26Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:16:29Do you know who I am?
00:16:31They don't know who you are.
00:16:35You hide it.
00:16:36Well...
00:16:37X-Team!
00:16:38Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:42Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:46Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta and then to New York.
00:16:53You forgot to bring the security team.
00:16:55Mind if I borrow your men?
00:17:02No.
00:17:03Toss these ill-mannered apes out!
00:17:08Oh!
00:17:09You bitch!
00:17:10I'll have my son teach you a real lesson!
00:17:19A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:17:23No.
00:17:25The guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:17:34You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffet, old money like me.
00:17:39Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:17:42Pleased to meet you all.
00:17:43Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution.
00:17:47What an honor.
00:17:48I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project.
00:17:51It's worth billions of dollars.
00:17:53Congrats.
00:17:54You'll be next.
00:17:56But we haven't received the contract yet.
00:17:58We deserve it.
00:17:59Pardon me.
00:18:00Oh, that's nothing.
00:18:01I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:18:02The Vanderbilts and Miss Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:18:05So, thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:18:10Thank you, Mr. Vanderbilts.
00:18:11Now, we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:18:15Yes.
00:18:16I heard they're a very important and powerful guests.
00:18:20Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:18:23Now, if we can just secure a position with this big shot, we can feast for generations.
00:18:30I'll do my best.
00:18:31Excuse me, second children.
00:18:32What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:18:33How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:18:47I told you Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:18:48Nothing will come of it and it only sickens me further.
00:18:49Don't flatter yourself.
00:18:50This is your ex-husband?
00:18:52What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:18:53Who the hell is this?
00:18:54You were cheating on me?
00:18:55No.
00:18:56No.
00:18:57No.
00:18:58No.
00:18:59No.
00:19:00No.
00:19:01No.
00:19:02No.
00:19:03No.
00:19:04No.
00:19:05No.
00:19:06No.
00:19:07No.
00:19:08No.
00:19:09No.
00:19:10No.
00:19:11No.
00:19:12No.
00:19:13No.
00:19:14No.
00:19:15No.
00:19:16No.
00:19:17No.
00:19:18No.
00:19:19No.
00:19:20No.
00:19:21No.
00:19:22No.
00:19:23No.
00:19:24No.
00:19:25No.
00:19:26No.
00:19:27No.
00:19:28No.
00:19:29No.
00:19:30No.
00:19:31No.
00:19:32No.
00:19:33No.
00:19:34No.
00:19:35No.
00:19:36No.
00:19:37No.
00:19:38No.
00:19:39No.
00:19:40No.
00:19:41No.
00:19:42No.
00:19:43No.
00:19:44No.
00:19:45No.
00:19:46No.
00:19:47No.
00:19:48No.
00:19:49You dare hurt my mom and Taylee?
00:19:54Get your hands off her!
00:20:00My lady.
00:20:15My queen.
00:20:19It's...
00:20:28It's him!
00:20:30He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday!
00:20:34Who are these peasants?
00:20:36These seats are reserved for the Ellen Musk and her special guest!
00:20:41Oh, shut up, old man.
00:20:43You're disturbing the peace.
00:20:45You fuckers, you know who that is?
00:20:49That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:20:51You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:20:54His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:20:58The Civil War would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:21:01Vanderbilt.
00:21:02Vanderbilt.
00:21:04The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt, who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:21:12That, Lolly Vanderbilt family?
00:21:32I'm Harvey F. M. Buffett, the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:21:38I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:21:41And I can wipe you out with a strand of my hair.
00:21:45Not with me around.
00:21:47I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:21:51You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:21:53I'm Harvey F. M. Buffett, the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:21:55I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:21:57And I can wipe you out with a strand of my hair.
00:22:01Not with me around.
00:22:03I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:22:06You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:22:11You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:22:15We've had enough of your games.
00:22:17Security!
00:22:18Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:22:21Looks like the old guard is teaming up against you.
00:22:24But don't worry.
00:22:26You got no money here.
00:22:29I can handle myself, thank you.
00:22:32Yes, my friend.
00:22:34You're all despicable.
00:22:37An insult to your family names.
00:22:41Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:22:45Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:22:48Cut off all business ties.
00:22:50And if you don't,
00:22:53I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:22:58I knew it!
00:23:00You're here to fuck with me.
00:23:01You can't fool anyone here.
00:23:02How much money did you spend on that getup to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:23:07You're an orphan who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:23:11You have nothing.
00:23:13And you will always be nothing.
00:23:15She's a gold digger.
00:23:18Gold digger.
00:23:20Gigolo.
00:23:22Want to try me for a night?
00:23:24Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:23:26Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:23:28They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:23:32Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:23:33She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:23:37Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef!
00:23:38Security!
00:23:39Security!
00:23:44Security!
00:23:46You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:23:50And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:23:52You!
00:23:54Insolent fools.
00:23:55Let me guess.
00:23:58You're that special guest?
00:24:01I don't know.
00:24:03Throw them out!
00:24:05And not without some broken bones too.
00:24:13Back down, Max.
00:24:18I got this.
00:24:25What the hell are you two doing here?
00:24:47I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:24:50No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:24:52Oh my god, we're so screwed!
00:25:04Angela!
00:25:06Don't hurt her!
00:25:07You bitch.
00:25:08I've always been sick of you.
00:25:09You just threw yourself at me.
00:25:11How dare you insult my boss like that!
00:25:13Boss?
00:25:14Did she say her boss?
00:25:16Miss Musk?
00:25:18That's Ellen Musk?
00:25:20That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:25:22My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:25:25Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:25:28Past the American Revolution?
00:25:30Back to the Renaissance.
00:25:32If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:25:36That's Lady Lockhart to you!
00:25:37She's royalty!
00:25:38And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:25:42What do you want to do?
00:25:44Kneel for me!
00:25:46Oh, your majesty!
00:25:49Welcome to the United States.
00:25:52We've always been your loyal subject.
00:25:54Yes, your highness.
00:25:57Is it queen or princess?
00:25:59It doesn't matter!
00:26:01My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:26:03We didn't mean to offend her.
00:26:06Hey, what are you doing, you idiot?
00:26:08Let go of the boss lady and beg for forgiveness!
00:26:21What rightfully belongs to you.
00:26:33She's a badass herself.
00:26:42He missed out on a good wife.
00:26:44You! You! You!
00:26:46You told me your wife was a hippie peddler!
00:26:49Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time!
00:26:52No! No! Don't believe their lies! I worked hard for everything!
00:26:55You worked for everything?
00:26:57Hi, honey.
00:27:03So, our third year anniversary is coming up and I thought that maybe we can do something special this year?
00:27:09I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:27:11I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Closet Project and if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:27:16You were nothing before me! All your achievements, all your glory, that's all mine! Including the Maple Plaza contract. I can take all of that away. Just like that.
00:27:39No, you can't take that away from me!
00:27:42So that's why Elon Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this and nobody!
00:27:46Oh, and this antique wedding ring?
00:27:50Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:27:52It was Queen Victoria's and its worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:28:01No. No. I gave you back the ring? I divorced a royal heiress?
00:28:07No! No, actually, please! No! No, please take me back baby! I still love you!
00:28:18Aw man, looks like they started the party without us.
00:28:21No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower!
00:28:30God, these two again.
00:28:31Did he say, is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:28:34President Eisenhower's descendant. After General Eisenhower won World War II, each of his descendants have all gone on to become five-star generals, the highest rank in the nation's military!
00:28:43Glad you buffoons know your history! Sorry I'm late, babe. I got lost trying to find Atlanta. Then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:28:50And that there is, that is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:29:01He's Dr. House's protege!
00:29:03Dr. House? I thought that was just a TV show!
00:29:06Oh no, that's based on real figures.
00:29:08Yep, that's me. Son of James House. Dr. House, he's practically my uncle.
00:29:12I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him when I was just twelve years old.
00:29:17So he's been off crying himself a waterfall somewhere in the Netherlands for the last fifteen years.
00:29:23And I'm late because I ran out of gum and had to make a pit stop.
00:29:30Hey, Alan. Who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:29:35Uh, they're all your fiancés.
00:29:38What?
00:29:39Fiancés?
00:29:40Plural?
00:29:43Fiancés?
00:29:44Plural?
00:29:46Watch it, nerds! I'm her fiancé!
00:29:49No, I'm her fiancé!
00:29:50You can both shut up! I'm her fiancé!
00:29:53It's you!
00:29:55It's me! Who the hell is he?
00:29:57I'm Spider-Man!
00:29:59How are all three of these men my fiancé?
00:30:04Uh, your father had arranged these engagements years ago, but I didn't tell you because you decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:30:11She has three bad-ass fiancés and she marries his dumbass!
00:30:18Whatever.
00:30:19Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:30:24Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:30:28At your service!
00:30:31Me too.
00:30:37One down, two more to go.
00:30:39She's become queen!
00:30:41Bishop to G4.
00:30:42Ah!
00:30:45Ah!
00:30:46Ah!
00:30:47What, what, what is that?
00:30:49The most German fest and water in the Nile River.
00:30:52Ah!
00:30:55Ruck to A8.
00:30:57Hello?
00:31:01I thought I was king!
00:31:06No, you wish.
00:31:07The king doesn't do anything, so, Ellen can be my king.
00:31:11Oh, fine.
00:31:12Oh!
00:31:16Bankrupt the Fords right this second.
00:31:23I...
00:31:25I've been bankrupt!
00:31:26No!
00:31:27I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:31:42Well, guess what?
00:31:43Game over.
00:31:44Alright, boys.
00:31:46Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:31:48Oh, that's serious business.
00:31:50I'm right with you!
00:31:53Wait for me!
00:31:54Nobody beats me to the finish line!
00:32:05Angela!
00:32:08You already have three fiancés?
00:32:11You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:32:12I...
00:32:14want compensation.
00:32:18You greedy SOB.
00:32:20Who the fuck is that?
00:32:21My ex-husband.
00:32:23Wait, you were married?
00:32:24Yeah.
00:32:25And if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:32:30More for me.
00:32:31No, no, of course not.
00:32:32Just...
00:32:33Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:32:35Don't steal my joke!
00:32:37I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:32:39All evidence of your past with him will be gone.
00:32:42What?
00:32:43Is there something on my face?
00:32:44Uh, yeah.
00:32:45Murderous intent.
00:32:47Let's remarry.
00:32:49Let's remarry.
00:32:51You still don't realize.
00:32:54I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:32:58No, no.
00:32:59No, no!
00:33:00Sir! It's an emergency! We need to wreck right away!
00:33:27Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:33:31Okay, I'm on my way. She should be okay now.
00:33:40Hey, you! Watch over here. I'll be right back.
00:33:52You saved me.
00:33:57Fuck. I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:01Fuck. I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:05You've cheated on me, you've hit me, and you've insulted me.
00:34:09And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:34:13I fucking hate you.
00:34:16Little Lady Lockhart.
00:34:18What now?
00:34:20Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person, but if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:34:29How about us three?
00:34:30Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:34:33You were all fired.
00:34:35Yeah, no. You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:34:37But...
00:34:39This is your fault, you doofus! We never should have believed your bullshit!
00:34:43No! No! We can't lose our positions with Ellen Musk and the Lockhart.
00:34:50Help me!
00:34:52I'll get you for this!
00:35:00Never should have listened to you!
00:35:01I'm ruined because of you!
00:35:17So...
00:35:18What's the situation here?
00:35:20I want to marry you!
00:35:21I want to marry you!
00:35:30I want to marry you!
00:35:32Listen, I only met you guys a few hours ago, and I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:35:39But what if I told you that we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours?
00:35:46Much longer.
00:35:47Angela, your parents would like to have a video call with all of you.
00:35:59My lovely princess, how are you?
00:36:01Look, your mother and I are in Italy!
00:36:03The views here are absolutely stunning!
00:36:06Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:36:08I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing, blood-sucking, free-letter husband of yours.
00:36:16Can't call his name, but...
00:36:18Anyway, congratulations!
00:36:20I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:36:25Oh, you must pick one of them to marry, otherwise...
00:36:29Let me do it!
00:36:31You must choose one of them in seven days, otherwise we'll kill ourselves.
00:36:37Mom!
00:36:38Alright honey, that's it!
00:36:41Bye!
00:36:42Bye!
00:36:43So, who are you going to choose?
00:36:47Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:36:53What if I want all three of you?
00:36:56Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:37:02That seems greedy.
00:37:04But...
00:37:10I can always remove the other two options.
00:37:14Hey!
00:37:15I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:37:18I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:37:23Whoa, okay.
00:37:24No murder, please.
00:37:25I was just kidding.
00:37:27We have seven days to win her over.
00:37:31Ooh.
00:37:32It's like the Bachelorette.
00:37:34I know.
00:37:35We'll start with challenge one.
00:37:39Welcome to the show, the three badasses who want me.
00:37:42Today, we have our first challenge.
00:37:47What is all of this, Ellen?
00:37:50You'll see.
00:37:57Oh my god, oh my god, cockroaches!
00:38:02All women are afraid of cockroaches.
00:38:05And it is every man's job to save their beloved woman from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:38:10What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love for our single, but screaming her head off, heiress?
00:38:17Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:38:29It's up to the final two.
00:38:47Crunchy.
00:38:48That is sick, Cole.
00:38:49Hey, when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield, you'll be glad to see one of these around.
00:39:03There are two more left.
00:39:05Wanna try one?
00:39:06Oh my god, no!
00:39:07No!
00:39:08Oh my god, save!
00:39:10What?
00:39:11Save you!
00:39:12You're gonna save me!
00:39:13I'm a germaphoic doctor.
00:39:17These hands can't get germs on them.
00:39:19They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:39:36Thank god you're here.
00:39:40Are you alright, honey?
00:39:41Angela!
00:39:46Alright, you won the first challenge, so your reward?
00:39:49You get to watch over her for the night.
00:39:51Just don't cross the line if you know what I mean.
00:39:54I'm not her scumbag husband.
00:39:56You have nothing to worry about.
00:40:02Honestly, even if you guys fuck, it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:40:06At least my girlfriend gets some.
00:40:08I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:40:10The cockroaches!
00:40:13They're gone, they're gone.
00:40:15There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:40:18I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:40:26I need a drink.
00:40:27I need a drink.
00:40:28I need a drink.
00:40:35Whoa, easy!
00:40:36You're on an empty stomach!
00:40:37Oh, why do you care?
00:40:40You're trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela.
00:40:43You guys were late.
00:40:47I was blind for marrying that asshole.
00:40:51You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:40:57He never even loved me.
00:40:59And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:41:05Do you really think that you would still be number one on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I was around?
00:41:13You may not be number one on Forbes list, but you know what you're number one in?
00:41:18What?
00:41:22You're number one here.
00:41:29You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:41:33Lies.
00:41:36You all just want something from me.
00:41:43Angela, I know it's hard to trust again.
00:41:48But I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:41:54I'm the richest man in the nation.
00:41:56I don't need your power, your status, your wealth, your connections.
00:42:04I just need you.
00:42:08I'll prove my love to you within six days. I promise.
00:42:11I swear for months, my friends be happy.
00:42:13I swear I'm the expert.
00:42:14What are you matters?
00:42:19matrices for the fans.
00:42:26Screw the contest.
00:42:27I just want love.
00:42:28Angela!
00:42:29You're drunk.
00:42:31I'm an adult.
00:42:32Can't I go just get what she wants?!
00:42:34It's okay.
00:42:36But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:42:42Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:43:03Nine inch penis.
00:43:05Morning to you too.
00:43:08You sure you were drunk last night? You wouldn't-
00:43:10A girl remembers when she's had a nine inch penis inside of her.
00:43:16Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:43:19But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:43:22Because then they would-
00:43:24Say that you were being unfair?
00:43:26Technically us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:43:29I won the first challenge and according to Ellen
00:43:32my prize was to spend a night with you anyways.
00:43:35Just don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:43:42Are you sure you don't want a pretty heart?
00:43:46Stop.
00:43:49Fine, fine, fine.
00:43:51I won't tell.
00:43:55But only on one condition.
00:43:59I won't tell.
00:44:01But only on one condition.
00:44:04You have to go out on a date with me.
00:44:07Fine.
00:44:08I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:44:15You never noticed me.
00:44:19Well, uh, you should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:44:24It's only 7 a.m.
00:44:27She's still sleeping.
00:44:28I'm not sleeping alone.
00:44:29Yeah, I'm not letting my fiance be alone with another man for another second.
00:44:36Morning, gentlemen.
00:44:37Oh, or shall I say Ruffman?
00:44:39Oh, don't mind him.
00:44:42What's up, guys?
00:44:43We're ready for the second challenge.
00:44:45No cockroaches this time.
00:44:47Yes.
00:44:48No more terrifying things.
00:44:49That was my bad, Angela.
00:44:51This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:44:54I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:44:55The second challenge is...
00:44:58The second challenge is...
00:45:00A date.
00:45:01Lane, I should have asked for something else.
00:45:03A date?
00:45:05That's it.
00:45:06What's the catch?
00:45:07No catch.
00:45:08Just who Miss Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:45:11As simple as that.
00:45:12I know what I want to do.
00:45:13Let's start with me first.
00:45:14Okay, goals up first.
00:45:15Then...
00:45:16Me.
00:45:17Saved the best for last.
00:45:19Ain't that right, Angela?
00:45:20Then it's decided.
00:45:25Please don't take my BMW away!
00:45:28Too bad.
00:45:29You pissed off the Lockhart's.
00:45:32I have nothing left!
00:45:42That bitch who ruined me!
00:45:47It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:45:57General Eisenhower served!
00:45:59Unease, Lieutenant!
00:46:00This is my Lieutenant.
00:46:01He also manages this boxing gym.
00:46:03Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower!
00:46:05He's so serious!
00:46:06He's so serious!
00:46:07But...
00:46:08Hang on...
00:46:09Lieutenant!
00:46:10I don't know who I'm going to marry yet!
00:46:12Baby!
00:46:13I decided to take you here on my first date so that I can introduce you to my guns!
00:46:17Guns?
00:46:18Like...
00:46:19Murder weapons?
00:46:20Yes!
00:46:21Murder weapons!
00:46:22You're like my guns, babe!
00:46:30Pretty rock hard!
00:46:31Yeah!
00:46:32Let me show you what I can do with them!
00:46:33Lieutenant!
00:46:34Come close!
00:46:35Wait!
00:46:36You're just gonna hit him like that?
00:46:37He's not even gonna fight back?
00:46:38Fighting back will be treason, ma'am!
00:46:39Treason?
00:46:40You guys are way too serious!
00:46:41Look, you rock hard bitch!
00:46:42I've caught you!
00:46:43If I'm going down, you're all going down with me!
00:46:47Lieutenant!
00:46:48You're all going down with me!
00:46:49Lieutenant!
00:46:50levant vázback!
00:46:51Wait, you're just gonna hit him like that? He's not even gonna fight back?
00:46:55Fighting back will be treason, ma'am!
00:46:57Treason? You guys are way too serious.
00:47:01Look, you lock-heart bitch, I caught you!
00:47:03If I'm going down, you're all going down with me!
00:47:06Lieutenants, here's your attack!
00:47:08You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:47:25I will make you pay!
00:47:28If you don't mean to keep beating him up, we could just take him to the cops.
00:47:32Not when he tries to hurt you!
00:47:38It's always a bit violent. Some might call it being protective.
00:47:43Poor anger issues.
00:47:45What if we get married and I forget to use a coaster on an antique table or something?
00:47:49Is he gonna be, like, rough?
00:47:53Hey, some girls are into that.
00:47:55I don't know if I am.
00:47:58Well, maybe Shane will be your type.
00:48:03Your date with Shane starts now.
00:48:08Hey.
00:48:10Hey.
00:48:11Cool ride.
00:48:13A gift from the Chancellor of Germany when I saved his wife.
00:48:16Impressive.
00:48:20Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:48:23Refreshing.
00:48:25I got cool mint, too.
00:48:27Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:48:30What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:48:33Fruit-flavored gum. I can't stand those.
00:48:35So, where are you taking each other?
00:48:37Let me show you.
00:48:38Okay.
00:48:46Dr. Wilson!
00:48:48A VIP of VIPs!
00:48:50Right this way.
00:48:51VIP of VIPs?
00:48:53Ah, just some other guy I saved.
00:48:55I forget who.
00:48:56You saved a lot of football.
00:48:58I do what I can.
00:49:01Oh my gosh.
00:49:03It's my gold digging neighbor who just got dumped by her husband.
00:49:07Sandra Miller.
00:49:08What are you doing here?
00:49:09I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs.
00:49:12Your mother-in-law told me all about the divorce and how you hired some gigolo to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:49:20How low of you.
00:49:22What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:49:23Of course your bird brain wouldn't remember.
00:49:26I sell high fashion jewelry pieces so high-end you couldn't even afford even if you sold your organs.
00:49:32The auction begins.
00:49:34I'll deal with you later.
00:49:37Here, I'll just be one second.
00:49:43Cameron.
00:49:45I have a task for you.
00:49:46Our next piece is absolutely extraordinary.
00:49:52Cleopatra's armband.
00:49:54Sold by our vendor, Sandra Miller.
00:49:58For five million dollars.
00:50:00Excuse me.
00:50:02I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:05It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:07I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:10It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:12What are you doing?
00:50:13Just watch.
00:50:14That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:50:19Please.
00:50:21I'm an expert and that's a fake.
00:50:24She probably got it at the flea market she works at.
00:50:26You work at a flea market?
00:50:28Not this again.
00:50:30Cut the bullshit.
00:50:31That wouldn't even sell for five dollars.
00:50:33Oh yeah?
00:50:35Here, you want it?
00:50:36For free.
00:50:38Ew!
00:50:39I don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:50:41Well, that's too bad then.
00:50:45Because you are the fraud.
00:50:47What are you talking about?
00:50:49Who the hell are you to accuse me?
00:50:52Throw them out!
00:50:54Dr. Wilson, I know you're a legend in medicine.
00:50:57But we're professionals.
00:50:59Oh yeah?
00:51:00And that armband sells for five million dollars?
00:51:03Yeah.
00:51:04Mine is the real thing.
00:51:06You two are just upset because you're too poor to afford our luxury items.
00:51:11What was that so?
00:51:13Would a so-called expert fail to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:51:17Dear Lord.
00:51:19This is real.
00:51:21It's authentic.
00:51:23It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:28Cameron, what have you found?
00:51:30Yeah, that picture of Cleopatra's armband you sent me?
00:51:34It's a replica.
00:51:36They had the same one right here at the flea market.
00:51:39So, you are the fraud.
00:51:42So, you just went to the flea market so you can buy some fakes.
00:51:46And Cameron, how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:51:50$150.
00:51:52Wow. Not even five dollars.
00:51:55Sandra.
00:51:57You've been duping us the whole time?
00:51:59Arrest her!
00:52:01No! Please! It was just this one time! Please!
00:52:05What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:52:07Uh, investigating lead poisoning from cheap jewelry for the Emperor of Japan.
00:52:11Bye!
00:52:12A lackluster from the jewelry industry forever.
00:52:23I had a really great time tonight.
00:52:26Me too.
00:52:28May I have a kiss?
00:52:42You're scared.
00:52:44Something wrong?
00:52:45Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:52:53Yep. You never have to worry about stinky breath for me.
00:52:56Oh!
00:53:06You owe us a bunch of money, Cooper.
00:53:10I don't have any money.
00:53:12How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:53:14I guess you'll only pay up if I break your other leg.
00:53:22Stop!
00:53:26Mr. Vandeville.
00:53:30Mr. Buffett.
00:53:31This is the contract for the Maple Plaza project.
00:53:37That's right.
00:53:39Miss Musk wanted me to give it to you.
00:53:41I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:53:44I knew Angelo was still in love with me.
00:53:46No, no, sir.
00:53:47Sorry about those injuries from earlier.
00:53:49It was all just a little less understanding.
00:53:52Yeah, we could be partners again.
00:53:55And then maybe you can tell Lady Lockhart to put in a good word for us?
00:54:01Angela still loves me. She's just throwing a fit.
00:54:04She'll be back to me soon enough.
00:54:06Yeah, do you need any help winning her back?
00:54:09We can give you jewelry to give to her.
00:54:11I was just sucking up to these pricks a few days ago,
00:54:14and now they're all begging me to help them out.
00:54:17It feels so damn good to be in power.
00:54:20Sure.
00:54:22I'll put in a good word for you.
00:54:24I just need...
00:54:25Anything you tell us, we'll give you anything.
00:54:28Once I take everything from these idiots,
00:54:31I'll go after Angela Lockhart for my revenge.
00:54:40I'll give you the contract that you have to call with, just like you asked me to.
00:54:44Well done, he'll be fucked soon.
00:54:47Well done, he'll be fucked soon.
00:54:50I don't get it, Miss Musk.
00:54:52That contract has a preliminary clause.
00:54:54It requires him to pay 50% of the costs up front as a deposit.
00:54:57And if he can't, then what?
00:54:59He'll be bankrupt.
00:55:01So as long as he's greedy enough to take it.
00:55:04I'm avenging my best friend.
00:55:05I want to show the world that without Angela Lockhart, he's nothing.
00:55:16I signed the Maple Plaza project.
00:55:19We should celebrate.
00:55:21You did?
00:55:23You see, I know my son has it in him.
00:55:25That skank Angela is nothing next to you.
00:55:28And it's all thanks to you, sweetheart.
00:55:31Actually, it's thanks to Angela.
00:55:33Angela.
00:55:36What?
00:55:38You're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife?
00:55:40Oh, no, no, no, no, he's not.
00:55:42Jared, what are you doing?
00:55:44You have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you.
00:55:48It's my decision, Mom.
00:55:50I'm the head of the house here.
00:55:52I'm telling my dad.
00:55:54Fine, go right ahead. He has enough problems himself.
00:55:56If you're obedient, I'll keep you around as a side piece, but if not, you can scram.
00:56:00Dad, Jared is being mean to me. Teach him a lesson.
00:56:06Kayleigh, be a good girl, okay?
00:56:08Jared has the backing of some very powerful people now.
00:56:12Don't get on his bad side.
00:56:14We can't afford to piss him off.
00:56:16So do as he says.
00:56:17What's that?
00:56:18I'm sorry. Be your side piece.
00:56:29Very good.
00:56:31I'm happy you've come around.
00:56:33Now let's go celebrate.
00:56:37I mean, do I really want to be with Mr. Minty Mouth forever, though?
00:56:41But that tongue action, though.
00:56:43Tongue is important.
00:56:45In more than just one spot.
00:56:46Darling, we are in public.
00:56:48It's true.
00:56:50Stomachache.
00:56:52Again?
00:56:53I have to run to the bathroom.
00:56:54Devon should be here to pick you up soon.
00:56:56Okay.
00:56:58Devon's late.
00:57:00Not a good sign for a date.
00:57:03This hotel restaurant has five Michelin stars.
00:57:07It's her.
00:57:09And she's alone.
00:57:10With no one to save her.
00:57:14You whore.
00:57:15You seduced my son so he could get back with you.
00:57:21Let me tell you.
00:57:23I would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me.
00:57:30Hey, you guys can fight all you want, but you need to take this somewhere else.
00:57:33Whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this.
00:57:37What?
00:57:38Why do I have to leave?
00:57:39She's the one starting shit.
00:57:41Because I have money and you don't.
00:57:43You're just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:57:46And my son just signed a $100 billion contract.
00:57:49He's still got the contract?
00:57:52Hmm.
00:57:53Must be Ellen's doing.
00:57:55Even if he does sign it, he doesn't have the liquidity to pay the deposit up front.
00:57:59Oh, he's just gonna...
00:58:00Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:58:04Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:58:09You take my charity and toss it in my face as if it's your own.
00:58:14My maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful amount.
00:58:17$1,000 to take her away.
00:58:20$2,000 to drag her away.
00:58:22$5,000 to beat her away.
00:58:29Oh, oh, hey!
00:58:30Hey!
00:58:31Ow!
00:58:32Hey!
00:58:33Stop!
00:58:35You okay?
00:58:36Are you hurt?
00:58:41Weekly.
00:58:42You!
00:58:43You!
00:58:44Just a few days ago, you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced.
00:58:48And now you have two more?
00:58:49What a whore.
00:58:51What a whore.
00:58:52Yeah.
00:58:53And Jared wanted to get back with her?
00:58:55What if she has an STD?
00:58:57Oh, like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an STD.
00:59:01Let's go.
00:59:03We'll expose her to Jared.
00:59:04Hang on.
00:59:06What do you want?
00:59:08I'll scream!
00:59:09I don't hear women.
00:59:11But I never said I don't kill them.
00:59:14But I never said I don't kill them.
00:59:18Oh, God.
00:59:19He is a murderer.
00:59:20What if he murders me?
00:59:21Not him.
00:59:22Definitely not him.
00:59:28We're not afraid of you.
00:59:30That's enough.
00:59:31This isn't a war zone.
00:59:32You'll be removed from being a five-star general if you hurt a civilian without adequate cause.
00:59:37I was just messing with them.
00:59:39Was he though?
00:59:40We're not afraid of you.
00:59:43Jared!
00:59:44You have to avenge us.
00:59:45Look at this slut.
00:59:46She's found two more boy toys.
00:59:48She's cheating on you.
00:59:49Don't get back with her.
00:59:51Oh, Mr. Cooper, it's you.
00:59:52I apologize for this scene.
00:59:54I'll toss out the potty crashes immediately so that you can go to your salvation banquet.
00:59:58Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:00:00Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:00:02The potty crashes.
01:00:06Oh.
01:00:07You have any idea who that is?
01:00:08That's my wife.
01:00:09Please.
01:00:10Save that title for the real skank over there.
01:00:13That's right.
01:00:14Know your place.
01:00:15Shut up.
01:00:16She's cheating on you.
01:00:19Know your place.
01:00:20You're just a side piece.
01:00:21If I still want you, that is.
01:00:23Eric.
01:00:24Have you gone mad?
01:00:25This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
01:00:27You slap her for this whore?
01:00:29Mom!
01:00:30They really think there's something, huh?
01:00:32Angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age.
01:00:37She's richer even than Ellen Musk.
01:00:40I only got the maple closet project because she gave it to me.
01:00:44What?
01:00:46You!
01:00:47Apologize right now or I will kick you and your father to the curb.
01:00:51I'm sorry.
01:00:52No.
01:00:53This can't be.
01:00:54I made you divorce.
01:00:55Go home.
01:00:56You're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet.
01:01:16I apologize on behalf of my mother.
01:01:19Honey, I know you came here to celebrate my achievements.
01:01:22I promise no one will bother you anymore.
01:01:25I didn't come here for you.
01:01:28I'm on a date.
01:01:30A date with two men at the same time?
01:01:34She really is a whore.
01:01:35Angela, please forgive me.
01:01:37I really do love you.
01:01:41Oh-ho!
01:01:42Lady Knockhart is here!
01:01:45Oh-ho!
01:01:46Lady Knockhart is here!
01:01:48I assume.
01:01:49Yeah, yeah, we already know you beat Ford's effort.
01:01:53We're too old for that.
01:01:54They're here for my celebration banquet.
01:01:57Please, you gave me the contract so if anyone should go as my guest of honor, it should be you.
01:02:02Oh, yes, please, Ms. Lockhart, join us.
01:02:05We'll all be one happy business family again.
01:02:09What the hell are you all doing here?
01:02:11Where were you?
01:02:13Stomach issues.
01:02:14Again?
01:02:15Would you like my diagnosis?
01:02:17No.
01:02:20Let me make myself clear, okay?
01:02:23I would rather die than be with you again.
01:02:27Seems that they're not actually on good terms.
01:02:30I can't lose face in front of these pricks.
01:02:33Otherwise, they'll cut me off too.
01:02:34Angela, I know you're still mad, but please give me a chance.
01:02:37I'll prove it to you.
01:02:39You want a chance?
01:02:41Angela, no.
01:02:42You have three great guys here who all want to marry you.
01:02:45Don't take him back.
01:02:46I'll give you two choices.
01:02:51I'll give you two choices.
01:02:55Me.
01:02:56Or the contract.
01:02:58You're kidding me.
01:02:59No.
01:03:00I'm not kidding you.
01:03:02If you choose me, we can remarry this week.
01:03:06But you don't get the $100 billion contract.
01:03:10The choice is all yours.
01:03:12That's a tough choice.
01:03:14You think so?
01:03:15He either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon.
01:03:19Either way, he benefits.
01:03:21Why can't I have both?
01:03:23You really are a greedy bastard.
01:03:26Angela, I saved you in the pool, remember?
01:03:28I deserved the contract.
01:03:30Did you really?
01:03:35Look who's fashionably late now.
01:03:38He didn't save her at the pool.
01:03:41What are you talking about?
01:03:42I, uh, I choose the contract.
01:03:46I knew it.
01:03:47You'll get what's coming to you.
01:03:50With this contract, my company's earning potential is limitless.
01:03:54Angela Lockhart, you humiliated me in front of everyone.
01:03:57I will get you one day.
01:03:58Let me show you something.
01:04:00Let me show you something.
01:04:12You saved me.
01:04:18You saved me.
01:04:19I'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life.
01:04:26But I promise you, I'm gonna make it up to you with the rest of our lives.
01:04:31No, no.
01:04:32I wasn't lying.
01:04:33I just couldn't, can't remember exactly what happened that day.
01:04:44Does that mean we both each saved her once?
01:04:48What?
01:04:50Me?
01:04:51Dr. Wilson losing at saving people?
01:04:53No way.
01:04:54You guys, one of you, do something life-threatening right now.
01:04:59You're crazy.
01:05:01And actually, they've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:05:06What?
01:05:08Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings.
01:05:12Turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts.
01:05:15To put it simply, they've been stealing from you.
01:05:19I can't believe I didn't realize.
01:05:21Ms. Lockhart, I'm so sorry.
01:05:24I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly.
01:05:27No, it's not your fault.
01:05:28They're just too slick.
01:05:30You'd like me to punish them for a lot.
01:05:32Oh God, no.
01:05:33Not that again.
01:05:34Please.
01:05:36Max, you know what to do.
01:05:44The banks have pulled all of our funds.
01:05:53All business ties have been severed.
01:05:55We're bankrupt!
01:06:01How did you do that?
01:06:03Who are you?
01:06:04And don't say Spider-Man!
01:06:08I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:11I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:15I am...
01:06:17Crypto-punk number two!
01:06:19What did he say he was?
01:06:20That's more bizarre than Spider-Man!
01:06:23You're Crypto-punk number two?
01:06:26Well, I'm Crypto-punk number one.
01:06:29See? You are number one at something.
01:06:31The most expensive NFT collection in the world.
01:06:34Forget Forbes' list.
01:06:36It's all about young money now.
01:06:38So, how about our day?
01:06:40I'm not letting them one-up me on this one.
01:06:48I'll spy too.
01:06:50They forgot to cancel my contract.
01:06:51I still have the $100 billion project.
01:06:53Yes! I'm rich!
01:06:55They make them all pay soon!
01:06:56What?
01:06:57Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:06:58The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:07:00Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all finances.
01:07:01What?
01:07:02What?
01:07:03Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:07:04The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:07:05Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions.
01:07:06No!
01:07:07I'm bankrupt!
01:07:08What?
01:07:09Mr. Cooper, sir.
01:07:10The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:07:13Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions.
01:07:28No!
01:07:29I'm bankrupt!
01:07:30Angela Lockhart, you tricked me!
01:07:31Oh, allow me.
01:07:32I'm sorry I was late, my queen.
01:07:33I had to get some very important materials for our special date.
01:07:35Well, cheers.
01:07:36Cheers.
01:07:37Cheers.
01:08:06What?
01:08:07This looks good.
01:08:13Did you use my spices?
01:08:15I know your ex and law has never appreciated you.
01:08:20You can have all the money and power in the world and you still can't force a man to love you.
01:08:26I couldn't even remember our anniversary.
01:08:29Angela?
01:08:34Angela, your future with me, it's going to be different.
01:08:42Come on.
01:08:44Go upstairs.
01:08:46Okay.
01:08:48Wow, Devin, I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on these past few years, just because of some silly mistake.
01:09:12Angela, I've known and loved you for three whole years.
01:09:17Actually, I've also loved you for three years.
01:09:21That's right. I fell in love with you three years ago, too.
01:09:25How is all of this possible?
01:09:28I didn't meet any of you until recently.
01:09:31Well, actually, maybe Devin, but...
01:09:35I've had a crush on you since college.
01:09:38You're my motivation to go to business school.
01:09:41Despite who you were, you never judged me for being poor.
01:09:46Are you trying to get hired at Fortune 500 in a suit like that?
01:09:56All you do is babble on and on about internet money, Bitcoin and shit like that.
01:10:04Are you trying to steal my spot?
01:10:08I'll teach you a lesson.
01:10:12Hey! Get away from me!
01:10:14Shut up!
01:10:16Feisty girl. I like her.
01:10:20How is he?
01:10:30It's a rare poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in Africa.
01:10:34Astaga saltipu.
01:10:36Can it be cured?
01:10:38I actually think I know that poison.
01:10:40It sounds really scary, but its cure can actually be found in any developed country.
01:10:44Household salt.
01:10:52I like her.
01:10:54There you go.
01:10:56Oh shit, I'm late for swim practice.
01:11:10I like her.
01:11:12I've had my rivals ever since.
01:11:13So, that's how I, well, we all met.
01:11:18I barely remember.
01:11:20Should have never let you go to swim practice that day.
01:11:23Matthew Richards, the guy who poisoned me, attacked you out of revenge.
01:11:28You wouldn't have known.
01:11:29I did hear he dropped out and became a loan shark though.
01:11:31That makes you feel any better.
01:11:33Yeah, I think that suits him a little better.
01:11:36Yeah.
01:11:37Angela?
01:11:38Your seven days is almost up.
01:11:39Now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three years.
01:11:43Who will you pick?
01:11:49How can that be?
01:11:51Angela Lockhart is an heiress?
01:11:58Kaylee, we've gone bankrupt.
01:12:01Bankrupt?
01:12:02The Vanderbilt's have gone bankrupt?
01:12:06Well then, get out of here.
01:12:09You can't do this to me.
01:12:14Jared.
01:12:15Mom, it's me.
01:12:16What happened?
01:12:18Jared, I have carefully reconsidered.
01:12:21Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:12:23You should get back with your wife.
01:12:25We're bankrupt.
01:12:26What?
01:12:27Jared Cooper.
01:12:28We're here to propose your belongings.
01:12:29No one is going to save you now.
01:12:30What?
01:12:31What?
01:12:32What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:12:34Who will you pick?
01:12:36I...
01:12:37I...
01:12:38I brought you fried chicken?
01:12:39Fried chicken?
01:12:40Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:12:41Yeah, he's right.
01:12:42I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:12:44Oh!
01:12:45What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:12:51Who will you pick?
01:12:55I...
01:13:00I brought you fried chicken?
01:13:02Fried chicken?
01:13:03Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:13:05Yeah, he's right. I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:13:08Sucking up last minute!
01:13:10At least I don't speak like an AI robot.
01:13:13Hey! Stop! Stop!
01:13:16Welcome back to The Bachelorette.
01:13:19I mean, the three badasses who want me.
01:13:22I mean, Angela Lockhart...
01:13:25You know what I mean.
01:13:27Today, our heiress Bachelorette will choose
01:13:30which one of our three badasses will she marry.
01:13:34Will it be Shane, the doctor?
01:13:38Cole, the general?
01:13:41Or Devin, the CEO?
01:13:47Uh, looks like our Bachelorette may need a little more time to decide.
01:13:51Oh, the suspense is killing me!
01:13:54But when she does, she will take this eternal rose made from glass imported from Venice
01:14:00and give it to our winner.
01:14:03Angela?
01:14:06Angela?
01:14:07Oh.
01:14:08I, uh...
01:14:10I need more time to think.
01:14:13Uh, while our Bachelorette takes a little time to decide, why don't we check in with each of our candidates?
01:14:23Let's check in with each of our candidates.
01:14:26Let's start with Cole.
01:14:28Cole.
01:14:29There's not much to say.
01:14:33Who wouldn't want a five-star general who has huge biceps and massive chest?
01:14:41Who would protect their wife?
01:14:45Okay.
01:14:47Uh, Shane?
01:14:49Muscles?
01:14:50Money?
01:14:51They only get you so far.
01:14:55But you need a well-balanced man like me.
01:14:57That has more than one way to keep a lady happy.
01:15:00If you know what I mean.
01:15:02Okay.
01:15:03I think we do.
01:15:06And Devon.
01:15:07That was quite disgusting.
01:15:10I just hope Angela's okay.
01:15:15I know she's going under a lot of stress right now.
01:15:18A lot of choices to make.
01:15:20And she's my queen.
01:15:22I just really hope she's okay.
01:15:24Now one more thing.
01:15:26What kind of a doctor brings fried chicken to a girl?
01:15:30That's a good point.
01:15:32It's bad for her heart.
01:15:35And then you!
01:15:36What?
01:15:37You know what they say about military men.
01:15:40They beat their lives.
01:15:46Enough!
01:15:48Stand up!
01:15:51Hey, you guys.
01:15:53Whoa!
01:15:54Break it up!
01:15:55Hey!
01:15:56Break it up!
01:15:57Cut to commercial!
01:16:02Cut to commercial!
01:16:04This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my entire life.
01:16:24Who do I choose?
01:16:25Angela's marrying me!
01:16:26You're not stealing her from me.
01:16:27Oh yeah?
01:16:28I may be a doctor, but like I said, I know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world.
01:16:45What don't you have in that coat?
01:16:46Fruit flavored gum!
01:16:47I won't let you take Angela away from me!
01:16:48I'll fight you to the death!
01:16:49Don't forget about me.
01:16:50It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:16:51These stupid profile cards don't make any sense.
01:16:52They do not help.
01:16:53Who made these?
01:16:54Who made these?
01:16:55Who made these?
01:16:56Don't forget about me. It's time I reveal my true identity
01:17:03These stupid profile cards don't make any sense. They do not help who made these
01:17:26It's time I reveal my true identity
01:17:32I'm actually a part of the X-Men, and I have the power of telekinesis
01:17:39Jesus!
01:17:54We may have to work together to take him down
01:17:56This battle within our heads is the most intense I've ever experienced
01:18:10I may not be able to take them both down if they decide to team up
01:18:14Hmm, winter mint or cool mint?
01:18:22You know
01:18:24I've always really liked our hair
01:18:27I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it, so I appreciate that
01:18:34You know, Koum, Avar is really like the way you talk
01:18:44What do you got for me?
01:18:46I always really like the way you chew gum
01:18:49Yeah? It's fresh, right?
01:18:51You know, you're actually a really good doctor
01:18:57I'll take you out, and if you need me to look at you, I got you closer
01:18:59Hey, me too
01:19:01Angela's been kidnapped
01:19:03Angela's been kidnapped
01:19:05Angela's been kidnapped
01:19:07It was Jared Cooper
01:19:09Fuck her
01:19:10We have to find her
01:19:11What the hell?
01:19:11Her ring
01:19:12Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism
01:19:14on her ring just in case
01:19:16Well, let's go then
01:19:17My own!
01:19:18My fiance!
01:19:19My fiance!
01:19:20Jared, what am I doing here?
01:19:31What am I doing here?
01:19:32You destroyed me
01:19:36They took everything
01:19:39What?
01:19:39I have nothing left
01:19:42It's not my fault
01:19:43You're too greedy
01:19:46Angela!
01:19:46Come here!
01:19:47You're too late!
01:19:52I drugged her
01:19:53She'll be dead soon unless
01:19:54Oh, yeah?
01:19:55Have you forgotten who I am?
01:19:58He really does have everything in us, Coach
01:20:00Everything except for fruit
01:20:01Yeah, except for fruit flavor gum
01:20:02We get it already
01:20:02Just save my boss
01:20:06Here you go
01:20:12You're all good now
01:20:14Oh, thank God
01:20:14But what do we do with that piece of shit?
01:20:18What?
01:20:18What are you going to do to me?
01:20:21Hey, stop!
01:20:21No!
01:20:21Don't!
01:20:24Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever
01:20:32Why'd we didn't actually have that fight?
01:20:34Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all
01:20:42So who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:20:44You've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding
01:20:47The Prince of Bhutan
01:20:49And remember
01:20:50We will kill ourselves if you don't choose
01:20:57Welcome back to the finale of
01:20:59The Three Badasses Who Want Me
01:21:02We're down to the wire
01:21:03Literally
01:21:04The wedding day
01:21:05But who's the groom?
01:21:14Welcome back to the finale of The Three Badasses Who Want Me
01:21:23But who's the groom?
01:21:27Uh, seems our era still hasn't decided
01:21:32Any input from the parents?
01:21:34Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice
01:21:38Well, this is exciting
01:21:39Who should my daughter pick?
01:21:42Let me think
01:21:46I like the doctor
01:21:48He's cute
01:21:51But the general looks like a strong fellow
01:21:55And we can't forget about Devin Sterling
01:21:57The one who's loved her the longest
01:21:59Isn't that right, Devin?
01:22:01Angela
01:22:01You are all three very fine gentlemen
01:22:13And I'm really grateful for all of your love
01:22:18But this was a really hard decision
01:22:21And I decided to devise one last challenge
01:22:25I'm just kidding, I'm just as sick of this as you guys are
01:22:41Each of our candidates have saved our main character
01:22:45I mean bachelorette once
01:22:47They've all proven their undying love
01:22:50So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:22:53Literally
01:22:56Could it be
01:22:58The sexy and protective
01:23:00General with a temper
01:23:01Mr. Cole Eisenhower
01:23:08Or
01:23:08The fun, wicked-minded
01:23:10But kind of weird
01:23:13Dr. Shane Wilson
01:23:17And last but not least
01:23:19Could it be
01:23:20The richest man of them all
01:23:21The man Angela would have married a long time ago
01:23:25Mr. Devin Sterling
01:23:29Gentlemen
01:23:31It's been a pleasure getting to know you
01:23:33As
01:23:35May the best man win
01:23:37May the best man win
01:23:39Drum roll, please
01:23:41I'm gonna make you understand
01:23:46Never gonna keep you up
01:23:48Never gonna let you down
01:23:50Never gonna run around and desert you
01:23:54Seriously, Ricky?
01:23:55I choose...
01:24:04I need a powerful strong man and I really feel like you can protect me
01:24:19Who could resist those guns?
01:24:24Could they interest you in an NFD, Ellen?
01:24:26Would you like a full body choke-up?
01:24:41Shane, it's you
01:24:42I'm lovesick for you
01:24:44You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:24:46Yeah
01:24:47It's that tongue action, ladies and gents
01:24:53Ellen, be my new queen
01:24:54Think of what we can build together
01:24:55Thank you
01:24:56Clans, babe
01:24:57Clans, yeah
01:25:09It's always been you
01:25:10I'll always love you
01:25:22Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody
01:25:27Would you like a full body check-up?
01:25:28Have you seen my murderer weapons?
01:25:30I need fruit-flavored gum for you
01:25:40I need kh non-derms the same thing
01:25:41The same thing, and the question but I'll help you
01:25:42Live in the room
01:25:42Organize myself
01:26:00Can I heat off the dice?
01:26:01I want clause-up
01:26:01Follow-up
01:26:01Then addles and reads
01:26:02Go ahead
01:26:03병
01:26:04おい
01:26:04поним
01:26:05отдел
01:26:06party
01:26:08It's nothing
Recommended
1:26:56
|
Up next
54:46
1:26:56
1:40:50
24:48
0:43
9:47
0:31
Be the first to comment