00:00Okay, Nala, so we're reviewing The Blue Lagoon. Wow, a movie about being stranded on an island. Reminds me of my exile, except with a lot less fur and way more questionable hair.
00:10You mean your glamorous Hakuna Matata spa vacation exile? Please, Simba, you had Warthog Room Service. At least the Blue Lagoon kids didn't have to sing about it, unless missing 80s synth counts.
00:21Hey, Warthog Room Service is the latest trend, thank you very much. Still, you have to admit, watching them survive with like zero wilderness skills was hilarious. I practically expected Timon to pop out yelling, you call that a coconut?
00:33Simba, their wilderness skills are about as reliable as Scars promised to babysit. I mean, they spent years alone and still didn't invent shampoo. Even lions know how to groom well most lions.
00:44Ouch! I'll have you know, this mane is 70% pride, 30% twigs, and mysterious leaves, but I get it, there's something wild about love growing in the middle of nowhere, even if you mostly just invent new ways to get sunburned.
00:57Exactly. It's kind of sweet, plus it's proof you don't need a kingdom to fall in love a deserted island and some truly tragic fashion will do. Their outfits make Rafiki's baboon butt look high fashion.
01:08New life goal, never get fashion tips from marooned 80s teens. But Blue Lagoon did teach me one thing, true love survives anything except bad haircuts.
01:18And now all I can picture is you lost on an island desperately trying to braid your mane for Instagram-like survivor. Pride Lands Edition, coming soon to a lagoon near you?
Be the first to comment