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Taskmaster NZ S06E04
Taskmaster NZ S06E05 >>> https://dai.ly/x9psiq4
Taskmaster NZ S06E05 >>> https://dai.ly/x9psiq4
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TVTranscript
00:00Oh
00:30Kia ora koutou and welcome to Taskmaster, the show that comedians say yes to because they're desperate to reinvent themselves, or in Jack Ansett's case, invent themselves.
00:46My name's Jeremy Wells and I am the Taskmaster.
00:52Tonight, our five comedians will be competing in a series of wickedly complex tasks.
00:57And for their efforts, they can win this, a beautiful rendition of My Bonce, a creation of which broke at least three of the Ten Commandments.
01:09And I would like to once again apologise to my neighbour's oxen.
01:13Tonight's comedic combatants are Alice Sneddon,
01:18Brie Tomasel,
01:21Jack Ansett,
01:23Jackie Van Beek,
01:25and Pat Sassati.
01:27And beside me, as always, is a man who would do anything for me,
01:33and I would do some things for him, provided I haven't got anything else on.
01:38Ladies and gentlemen, it's Paul Williams.
01:44What's our prize task tonight, Paul?
01:46Tonight, we've asked our contestants to bring in the thing that will be their downfall.
01:54What did you bring in, Jackie?
01:55I think, let's show the image.
01:59Okay, so unfortunately there's little contrast in this image, but if you can see it's a huge five litre bottle of white vinegar.
02:10Now, I keep it in the laundry, but I also bring it to the dinner table and dress the salad.
02:17And it's like every time, honestly, I do it, I think, oh my God, is it bleach?
02:21I feel like the mushroom lady from Australia.
02:26Oh, no point at me!
02:28No, you've got to take that on the day.
02:30But you have a similar vibe.
02:32Hey, I am not related to her.
02:34Brie, what did you bring in?
02:36I would say my downfall is going to be this game.
02:40There's people that know.
02:45I am currently up to level 12,048.
02:50Oh, my God.
02:55Not stop.
02:57Get your flowers.
02:58It takes about ten minutes per level.
03:01So, that means I've spent 83.7 days of my life has been dedicated to this game in the last five years.
03:11Brie's mum is in the audience and she's just shaking her head.
03:15Okay, Jack, what did you bring in?
03:17I brought in printouts of all my toxic group chats.
03:21Whoa!
03:23If these get out, it's not just going to be my downfall, it's also going to be, well,
03:28I'll show you some screenshots from the Taskmaster Season 6 group chat.
03:33Hi, guys, can't wait for the studio filming.
03:35We should get dinner before it all kicks off, right?
03:37You won't believe this.
03:38Brie comes in with,
03:40can't wait to get away from those losers over at ZM.
03:44What the hell, you animal!
03:47I'm going to sue you!
03:49That's not real!
03:51Alice then comes in with,
03:53the gender pay gap is real and should be larger.
03:55And two love reacts.
03:59I do stand by that.
04:00I am being paid too much.
04:03And then Pax went,
04:04TBH, I don't give a what the Taskmaster thinks of me.
04:08Give me one point, like, I don't even give a single
04:09I don't.
04:11And, um,
04:12and Jackie, Jackie's messages,
04:15we just straight up can't show on TV.
04:17So,
04:17yep.
04:19Alice, what did you bring in that's going to be your downfall?
04:21In fact, I've brought this.
04:23Yeah, that is a cauliflower.
04:24People who know me personally
04:27will know that this is
04:28a food that I am violently intolerant of.
04:32Whenever I eat even just a sliver,
04:34I am out for the count.
04:36And I'll be honest with you,
04:38violent diarrhoea.
04:40And these guys can attest that
04:42the aforementioned dinner that we had,
04:44Jack ordered cauliflower bites
04:46and I did not hold back.
04:48We are not allowed back in that restaurant.
04:51Pax, what did you bring in?
04:52Honestly, Jeremy,
04:54I cannot say anything about it.
04:56I just have to show you.
05:01I can't believe you've matched my skin tone.
05:04Yeah, yeah.
05:05My last year of high school,
05:06White Chicks is a popular movie.
05:10And there was a Halloween disco.
05:13We actually won Best Dressed.
05:14We won Best Dressed.
05:16Thank you so much.
05:18I don't know if I click.
05:18And I, in 2025,
05:21I regret doing white face.
05:22But also, crack up.
05:25Well, the white face
05:27is shocking a little bit,
05:28but it's more the way
05:29that you're biting your bottom lip.
05:31Yeah.
05:32Yeah.
05:33So how would you like to score this?
05:35Alice, one.
05:37Come on, a cauliflower gives you diarrhea.
05:39No, don't look at me.
05:40That's not gonna...
05:41I've got diarrhea now.
05:42Own what you've done.
05:43I'm doing the show.
05:45Jackie, two.
05:47Dammit.
05:48Brie, two.
05:50As well?
05:51Yeah, two.
05:51Because it's just distraction,
05:53isn't it, ultimately?
05:54Which leaves Pax and Jack...
05:56Yes.
05:57Both career-limiting.
05:59I think Pax has more of a career
06:01to ruin
06:03than you do.
06:05So I think you should get four
06:07and you should get five Pax.
06:08Okay.
06:10I'm so sorry.
06:11Okay, by round of applause,
06:15who knows who I am?
06:21Oh, my God.
06:22Oh, my God.
06:25Okay, Paul.
06:25Why are we?
06:26Should we get into a task?
06:28It's time for the Taskmaster Ranch Redemption.
06:38Oh.
06:39Ooh.
06:40I didn't do it.
06:42Where's Paul?
06:43Here he is.
06:44Wow.
06:45He looks so good.
06:46He looks dashing.
06:47It kills me
06:48that he gets to have a photo
06:49like that of himself.
06:51It's got a code on the back of it.
06:52Oh, my God.
06:53It's an escape room.
06:54Well, we are in prison
06:55by the looks of it.
06:56I love these.
06:57Do you?
06:57Yeah, I like them too.
06:58Bust out of this prison.
07:01Fastest to get outside wins.
07:02You may not leave the lab
07:04until you've found the blue key.
07:07Do you always read the tasks like this?
07:09Yes, Pax.
07:10You cannot leave the house
07:11until you've found the red key in the study.
07:14Prison guard Paul will be on patrol.
07:17If he catches you awake...
07:18Two minutes will be added to your time.
07:20Your time starts now.
07:21OK, let's do it.
07:22Oh, sorry, Lise.
07:23We're finding the red key.
07:24The blue key.
07:25I'm going to...
07:25Oh, shit.
07:26OK, this is not going to work well.
07:32You sleeping?
07:37Oh, yeah, I'll get that out.
07:39We need a combination lock.
07:40So we need a three-digit code for that one
07:41and I'm just going to grab it.
07:44So sexy when you just handle it with brute force.
07:47Oh, it'll be written on the desk like in school.
07:49OK.
07:49Oh, oh, five?
07:51Five, four, four, six.
07:53Down.
07:56Scott, I think we're...
07:56You sleeping?
07:58It's not good.
07:59I'm thinking about my mum.
08:02Back to sleep.
08:03I'm asleep.
08:04OK, you've got it.
08:05Let's go.
08:05Five, four, four, six.
08:07Yes.
08:09The encase.
08:10The pillowcase.
08:11OK, you really get in there.
08:13I can't really do much.
08:14I'm just...
08:14Yes.
08:16Two, three, seven.
08:16Oh, my God.
08:18Burner.
08:19Burner phone.
08:20I want to turn on.
08:22Under the bed, perhaps?
08:23Under the bed?
08:24Oh, there it is.
08:26What's that?
08:27What is it?
08:27It's a map.
08:27Prison guard pulls...
08:29Patrol route.
08:31This is the route he's on.
08:33OK.
08:33Is there something down here?
08:35Is it in the soap?
08:36Is it in the soap?
08:38Oh, yeah.
08:38OK, we can leave.
08:47No, but we have to take the map.
08:49Where's the map going?
08:50Down, down, down, down.
08:51Break, break, break.
08:53Wait until he comes to the lab, then we have the...
08:55Oh, my mum.
08:56Oh.
08:58Get back to sleep.
09:01Pex, you're touching life.
09:03God.
09:04Look.
09:04He's going down these tears now.
09:05If he doesn't come in here, he'll go outside for a bath.
09:08OK.
09:11So he's going outside.
09:12Shh, go quiet.
09:18I actually, I find it fascinating how people, particularly of, um, people who have less melanin.
09:27I find it fascinating how that community loves escape rooms.
09:32Yeah.
09:33Not so big with you?
09:34Not so big with our community, particularly because my dad was a refugee in the first 15
09:38years of his life was an escape room.
09:41You'd think you'd be great at it, then.
09:48OK.
09:48So they still have to find the red key in the study and escape the house.
09:53But so far, Brie and Alice found the blue key and escaped their cell in 16 minutes and 51 seconds.
10:00OK.
10:00Jackie, Jack and Pax found the blue key and escaped the cell in 4 minutes 19.
10:05Whoa.
10:05Whoa.
10:06Whoa.
10:07Time now for you at home to be imprisoned by the shackles of capitalism.
10:10We'll play some ads and we'll see you on the other side.
10:13APPLAUSE
10:13Go to Ko To and welcome back to Cast Master.
10:27Right now we are right in the middle of watching our teams escape New Zealand's least secure
10:32corrections facility.
10:34Where are we at, Paul?
10:35So at the halfway point, the team of three have a 12 and a half minute lead.
10:41Now they must find the red key in the warden's office.
10:45Here they are, the Jacks and Pax.
10:50What is the question mark?
10:52OK, so we need to work out what the spells may be.
10:54Let's take the first letter.
10:55OK, C.
10:56Cup or mug?
10:58Cup.
10:59Oh, oh, oh, come on.
11:01Mummy.
11:03Get back to sleep.
11:04I'm so asleep, baby.
11:05Um.
11:06So the question mark has to mirror that.
11:08Maybe it's what is the question mark.
11:11Is it the amount of letters in each word?
11:13Nug gum three.
11:14Eight.
11:14Ten.
11:15Three.
11:15Star, life.
11:16Four.
11:18Get back to sleep.
11:20You can do this.
11:22Especially Jackie.
11:24Jackie, what do you have that we don't?
11:26OK, I'm a linguistics expert.
11:28Yeah.
11:28It's linguistics, it's letters.
11:32I did do Shakespeare English in the year three days.
11:34I mean, it's not like I'm completely.
11:38Should I just call Jesse?
11:40He's really good at this stuff.
11:41Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, OK.
11:45Hey, man, what's up?
11:48Get back to sleep.
11:49All right.
11:49Yeah.
11:50Where'd you get a phone?
11:51That's contraband.
11:51No.
11:52No.
11:53We just want to take selfies.
11:58Star.
11:59Stop.
12:00Oh, oh, I've got it, I've got it.
12:02What is backwards?
12:03Mug gum needs ten.
12:06Oh, my God.
12:07Star.
12:07Oh, my God.
12:08That's right.
12:10I'm a genius.
12:11You're the smartest man in the world.
12:15That is brilliant.
12:16So it's pots, pots, pots, the pots up here.
12:18It's up here.
12:19Yes, it is.
12:20Oh, it is.
12:21It is.
12:22Oh, Jack's the weakest link.
12:24Oh, Jack's got the good letters there.
12:29Go, go, go.
12:30That way, no, no, no, that way.
12:32This way, this way, this way.
12:33Oh, shit.
12:34Get to sleep.
12:35Oh, my God.
12:39You sleeping?
12:39Oh.
12:40Good sleeping.
12:42OK, now we're playing the clear.
12:44We've got to get out of here.
12:45Let's just get to the cars.
12:46I want to see my kids.
12:47Let's go.
12:48Let's go watch.
12:55Jack, there was a real moment of team unity there
12:58when you cracked the code.
13:00Yeah.
13:01And then you immediately started rubbing it in their faces.
13:05Yeah.
13:06I just want to let everyone know how long it took
13:07our linguistics experts to not know the answer.
13:13But can I also just reiterate to you?
13:15Mm.
13:16Like, have some grace.
13:18Every time you get a win, you turn it and you, like,
13:22you bat it into the space.
13:23You love it in our face.
13:23You're going to say, we want to love you.
13:25You make it very hard.
13:27OK, let's talk about some times.
13:30Yes.
13:30Their total time to get out of the house
13:32was 40 minutes and 32 seconds.
13:34Oh, not bad.
13:36But that's pre the bonuses.
13:38So I caught them awake 14 times.
13:43Which adds 28 minutes to their time.
13:45For a total of one hour, eight minutes and 32 seconds.
13:49Woo!
13:50Yeah.
13:51Respectable.
13:52Yeah.
13:52Yeah.
13:53Yeah, that's all right.
13:54I hate it.
13:54OK, who have we got next, Paul?
13:56Here's Criminallus and Penitentiabry.
14:03OK.
14:05Freaky.
14:05Is this a, is this some sort of, um, phrase or something?
14:10OK.
14:12What looks out of place?
14:14Those pots always there.
14:16Oh, for f***s sake.
14:17I don't know.
14:20Red.
14:21Red.
14:25I've always wanted to be someone's prison bitch.
14:30I'm so scared.
14:33I'm so scared.
14:34Thank you, Bree.
14:35Thank you, Alice.
14:36See ya.
14:37See ya, Paul!
14:43Bree, is that the most fun you've had doing a task?
14:46I honestly had the best time.
14:49I just got confused because it was so easy.
14:54OK, let's do the scoring.
14:56The team of two, they escaped the house in 22 minutes and 51 seconds.
15:01How many penalties?
15:01I caught them awake three times.
15:04Oh, come on.
15:06For six minutes added, for a total of 28 minutes and 51 seconds.
15:11Happy.
15:13So the team of two won by 39 minutes and 41 seconds.
15:16Great timing.
15:16It's nice to see the positivity, too.
15:18Isn't it refreshing?
15:19That was really refreshing.
15:20I'm going to give you guys five points for that.
15:23Good vibe.
15:25The question is, how fewer points do you give the team of three?
15:28I feel sorry for them.
15:30Give them two.
15:31That's good.
15:31Not bad.
15:32That's good.
15:32That's good.
15:32Don't flash out.
15:34Fair.
15:35Fair.
15:36OK, how has that affected the scores for the episode, Paul?
15:40It's very tight.
15:41In first equal on seven, it's Bree and Pax.
15:46That's a weird feeling being up there.
15:48That task, Paul, has not filled up our allotted time slot.
15:52I think we should have one more, please.
15:54It's time to see how our contestants perform in the heat of the moment.
16:06Paul!
16:07Bree.
16:09You just woken up?
16:11No, I have just been regrouping.
16:13Oh, OK.
16:14Oh.
16:16You're nailed through your finger?
16:17Yeah.
16:18Why are you smiling so much?
16:20Did you believe it at all?
16:22No.
16:22Yeah, OK.
16:23Waste of time.
16:24Sweet.
16:26Oh, f*** sake.
16:27Film an extremely climactic scene.
16:32Most climactic scene wins.
16:34You must use this prop.
16:37This being this piece of paper, I assume.
16:39No.
16:39Or the skis.
16:40The skis.
16:42You have 40 minutes.
16:43Your time starts now.
16:45Well, we're off to a good start.
16:47OK, so immediately my brain goes to somebody hanging off the balcony using this holding
16:54on while having an orgasm.
16:56What's the orgasm bit?
16:57Well, that's also a climax.
16:59Oh, OK.
17:00Have a lot of people done orgasm?
17:02My first thought is, obviously, sex.
17:04What if we recreate the moment at the end of the Titanic?
17:09There's not a more climactic moment than the big door scene.
17:13What are the dogs that go searching in the snow?
17:16St. Bernard.
17:17So I'm going to need a St. Bernard.
17:19OK, that might be hard.
17:20Life is hard.
17:21OK, I'm going to need a St. Bernard.
17:23I was trying to think of, like, a big cliffhanger, and there's something in my life that I actually
17:27think about quite frequently, and I've never resolved it.
17:31And I think maybe if we filmed it documentary style, and then I resolved it, then that would
17:35be the climax.
17:39What a cliffhanger.
17:41What were you doing with your finger?
17:42Oh, it's just a bit of fun.
17:45Trying to make him laugh.
17:46Thought I would get a bigger laugh in the room.
17:48Um, turns out, big mistake.
17:52No, that bombed.
17:54Yeah, it did.
17:54Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
17:58Let's get into it.
17:59Her prop was an umbrella.
18:01It's Alice Sneddon.
18:03Lovely day on the mountain.
18:05Yeah, shall we go for a hike?
18:07Let's hike up this mountain.
18:08OK, better pack up our umbrellas first.
18:13Let's walk up the mountain.
18:15It's a beautiful mountain.
18:18Hey, Kevin.
18:19Yeah?
18:20Have you ever thought we could be more than just friends?
18:24I've thought about that a lot.
18:26Kevin.
18:27Yeah?
18:27Do you want a kiss?
18:29I want nothing more than to kiss.
18:41Oh my God.
18:43Whoa.
18:44Whoa.
18:45I think it's erupting.
18:47Oh my God.
18:48I am erupting.
18:50Gross.
18:51No.
18:51We've got to get out of here.
18:52I can't go right now.
18:54Oh.
18:55Whoa.
18:57Whoa.
18:58Whoa.
19:00No.
19:04The love of my life.
19:07Killed by the lava
19:08because he was climaxing.
19:12Sexually.
19:13Happy with that.
19:16Happy with that?
19:16Not really.
19:23So did the guy jizz or did the mountain jizz?
19:26Yeah.
19:27Well, isn't that interesting?
19:28Or is the mountain a metaphor?
19:29I think where it fell down slightly was the energy of vocal performance.
19:34Well, we all know that's not my strength, but you keep putting me in these positions.
19:39Can we hear you try and do two different voices?
19:42Yep.
19:43This is my first one.
19:44Yep.
19:45This is my second.
19:49Okay.
19:49Who's next?
19:50Now to the Swiss Alps, where the slopes are steep and the Swiss accents are undeniably authentic.
19:57Her prop was a set of skis.
19:59It's Jackie Van Beek.
20:00Harry, for God's sake, where are you?
20:05Hello there, ma'am.
20:07I'm from searching the rescue.
20:09How can I help you today?
20:10I was meant to meet my secret lover, Harry, here up on top of this magnificent alp.
20:15But he's four days late and I'm sick with worry.
20:19There was that terrible avalanche on Tuesday.
20:22But all the snow has melted.
20:23I mean, where could he possibly be?
20:25Well, no, not all the snow has melted.
20:27There is a small patch at the bottom of the hill.
20:33What's that strange beast sniffing around for down there?
20:37That's my St. Bernard.
20:39I'm going to have to go down there.
20:40I'm going to need to borrow your skis.
20:41Yes, ma'am.
20:42Okay.
20:43I'm coming, Harry.
20:45I'm coming, Harry.
20:48Don't go too fast.
20:50I need a spade.
20:52Here's the spade.
20:54I'll bring it down.
20:57Okay.
20:57Oh, God, the snow.
21:01Oh!
21:05Harry!
21:07No!
21:08No!
21:09So what accent did you tell Paul to do?
21:23I told you to do a kind of pan, scando, kind of as you see fit.
21:28Yeah, it was more Scottish, I thought, than Swiss.
21:30Yeah, I thought it was Scottish.
21:31Interesting heritage.
21:32At one point, you dipped into my Persian uncle.
21:36Accent-wise.
21:36So, well, it's time for what we call in the business, a cliffhanger.
21:42We'll see you in a moment.
21:43APPLAUSE
21:44Welcome back to Taskmaster.
21:57For the break we saw a man drown in lava and another man die of frostbite.
22:03Who's bringing us our next blockbuster climax, Paul?
22:06The back 90% of your seats will not be necessary.
22:10For this one you will only be needing the edge of your seat.
22:14His prop was some sunglasses, it's Climax Asadi.
22:22Paul, have you done it yet?
22:25Have you killed Pax Asadi, the employee that I hate so much?
22:29I can't do it.
22:30You got it man, the only way to get rid of an employee here in Aotearoa New Zealand is to kill them.
22:35So, you have until the end of the day.
22:38Yes sir.
22:39Paul, why are you doing this?
22:42The boss said I had to.
22:44Surely he could just let me go.
22:46Not from the balcony but just like legally.
22:49No, it was some weird rule.
22:51Paul, I have to tell you something else.
22:53What?
22:54I'm in love with you.
22:56You have to do this man.
22:58How much do you love this job?
23:00So much.
23:01Tell me, look at me in the eyes or in the glasses.
23:04Look at me in the glasses and tell me how much you love this job man.
23:07I love this job.
23:09Well then I guess that's it then.
23:11I love you.
23:12I love you.
23:13I love you.
23:14I love you.
23:15Sorry, can I just point out Pax has done whiteface again?
23:37I just don't think it's a very good cliffhanger.
23:42You should have cut it off before you hit the ground and leave us all in the lurch.
23:47The task was not a cliffhanger.
23:49What?
23:50It was the biggest climax.
23:52That's what it means.
23:53Climax.
23:54I would say a cliffhanger cuts off.
23:56The cliffhanger doesn't give you the climax.
23:58I'm working on my nice guy thing.
23:59I'm happy to bow down and let you guys have this one, hope you feel good.
24:04Three climaxes down, three tragic deaths.
24:08Can we go four and four?
24:10It's time to get real.
24:11There is a tragic glove story from Jack Ansett.
24:19Blood on my hands.
24:20The truth told at last.
24:22Yeah, okay, I'm just gonna message him and see if he wants to talk.
24:29Yeah.
24:30Okay.
24:31Hey man.
24:32Random message.
24:34Can I call you to confess something from school?
24:40Sent.
24:41You're probably wondering what this is all about.
24:48I guess I'll just start from the beginning.
24:52It was year two.
24:53One day at lunch time.
24:55I was walking into the cloakroom.
24:56Judah Watkinson.
24:56He was drinking out of his drink bottle.
24:58I walked past him and I smacked the bottle.
25:03And it knocked his tooth out.
25:04There was blood everywhere.
25:05And I ran.
25:06I just ran.
25:07I ran outside.
25:08I found my friend Daniel.
25:09I was like, what do we do man?
25:10This is gonna be the end of me.
25:11I'm finished.
25:12Look at me Jack, he said.
25:13Look at me.
25:14This is what you need to do.
25:15You say you were walking through the cloakroom through the toilet and your shoulder accidentally
25:20buffed the drink bottle.
25:21You're gonna be fine, he said.
25:22You're gonna be fine, he said.
25:23So we go back to class.
25:24We're doing our silent reading.
25:25And eventually, yeah.
25:26Mrs. Royal.
25:27She goes, can I please speak to Jack?
25:28Walk outside into the cloakroom.
25:29Judah is there.
25:30Blood everywhere.
25:31And Miss Royal says, Jack.
25:32Judah says, you smacked his drink bottle.
25:33And his tooth came out.
25:34Is this true?
25:35And I said, no.
25:36He's lying.
25:37What happened was, I was walking to the toilet and my shoulder.
25:39And my shoulder.
25:41Look back.
25:42You're going to be like a sign.
25:43It looks.
25:44And my shoulder, it's a sign.
25:46That's in the pack.
25:47It's a sign.
25:48And we're walking through the toilet.
25:49It's the case.
25:50I'm sorry.
25:51And this was four.
25:52Okay.
25:53So we go back to class.
25:55We're doing a silent reading.
25:56And eventually, yeah.
25:57Mrs. Royal.
25:58She goes, can I please speak to Jack.
25:59Walk outside into the cloakroom.
26:00walking to the toilet and my shoulder accidentally knocked it and I say if you
26:06don't believe me ask Daniel and he pulls through he goes Jack was walking to the
26:11toilet and his shoulder buffed the drink bottle. Mrs. Royal has heard all she
26:15needs to hear and she says to Judah stop making things up and go to the sick bay
26:19right now and she turns to me and says I'm so sorry about all this Jack now I
26:23go back to my classroom all my teeth intact and carry on with my schooling I'm
26:28just gonna message him and see if he wants to talk yeah sent I can't cover up
26:37this blood with this glove and take the this blood off my hands till I hear back
26:44from Judah
26:49so slightly different tech here we've gone true crime documentary yeah so the
26:55climax would be seems like a cliffhanger yeah it's the same thing if that was the
27:06Shawland Street Christmas cliffhanger you would be like I cannot wait for January
27:10which then we would see the climax yeah you've muddled it all up there are
27:15courses you can do Jack's a smart guy and so what I think Jack's gonna turn around
27:24and say to us now is here's the text from Judah I would love that to be the case
27:34Jeremy Wells Judah has not responded to any communication yeah we know why okay who
27:43have we got next Paul the final contestant to throw their hat in the ring it's Brie
27:47Thomas L climactic that's like big moment do you want me to look up what
27:52climactic means yeah C-L-I-M-A-T-I-C
27:58it's gonna be something about climate change isn't it relating to climate
28:04climate I knew it you love to do this Paul where you make people think that it's one
28:13thing and and you know what I actually think the Titanic scene still works I love
28:24you don't you do that don't you start saying your goodbyes do you understand
28:28Jeremy it's Paul it's snowing it's getting colder we're in the Bahamas I know that damn
28:35climate change Paul oh there's hail Paul promise me something great anything Paul promise look at
28:42me look at me promise that you'll put a multi on the Warriors to win the whole thing you know it's
28:48gonna be out yeah Paul soon there won't be any years left I think it's time to
28:54let go no I can just hold on
28:55no I think you should Paul don't let go
28:59Paul
29:08probably could have fit on here it's quite a lot of room Paul
29:12alright he's gone
29:18incredible investigative work from you again Brie they're throwing them up and I just keep
29:27no and so you ended up actually doing your original idea yeah made it work yeah there
29:33was hail there was snow there was what else did we have Paul there was a lot of
29:38references to the climate I will say mine was set in Guam which is at risk of
29:43you actually say Aotearoa New Zealand
29:49firstly Jack made a cliffhanger so even though I thought that was a great documentary it was really
29:55really good that's one point for you Alice yours was fantastic with the figurines but it didn't have
30:00anything to do with climate change so I think it's fair that you get two Pax also didn't have anything to
30:05do with the climate but I thought it was quite a biting satire on New Zealand's draconian employment law
30:12so I thought exactly so he gets three four points for Jackie because there was mention of the climate with the skiing
30:19oh yeah and then five points for Brie clearly because she understood the task
30:26well done
30:28we are going to take a break now which will give four of our comedians ample time to
30:32second guess their reading comprehension for every upcoming task in the series
30:37we'll see you in a moment
30:50welcome back to Taskmaster where five comedians are trying to win a cauliflower some vinegar and the ghost of Pax Asati
30:56just to change things up a bit I would like a task please Paul
31:00sure thing Jeremy let's cram in one more
31:03hi Paul
31:13hello Pax
31:14Paul
31:15Williams
31:16it's Williams
31:17I'm
31:18the nephew of Serena and Venus
31:22hello Alice
31:23psst
31:26oh thanks Paul
31:28thank you
31:30this is a lot of reading
31:32sorry
31:33during the next task you will hear a countdown from 40
31:35the vase
31:37will fall from the shelf
31:41oh okay
31:42with 29 seconds left
31:44ping pong balls will fall from the roof
31:46and Paul will throw a tennis ball to you with 25 seconds left
31:50you will be asked to complete the maze on the blackboard
31:54and to spell the word task in semaphore
31:57what the hell does that mean semaphore
32:00he's making words up
32:02the flag alphabet
32:04oh no
32:06the premier of New Zealand in 1874 was Sir Julius Vogel
32:11what's that got to do with anything
32:12why are you telling me about the premier
32:14what does that have anything to do with it
32:16and the second wire from the right will trigger the confetti
32:20the second wire from the right
32:22well it depends who's right
32:23you may not touch anything in this room
32:25until your time starts during the next task
32:28you must leave this room in eight minutes
32:30this is really really hectic
32:32your time starts now
32:34do you understand
32:35I can confidently say no
32:37this is actual insanity
32:41nope
32:42you've done much semaphore before
32:44semaphore was my first language
32:45you know you go to school
32:47start speaking English
32:48and then you just kind of forget it
32:50and I'll come over here
32:51bang
32:52and we're done
32:53whatever this is
32:54leave the room please
32:56oh god
32:57I'm so anxious
33:08hello Pax
33:09what's that
33:10hello Alice
33:11hello Alice
33:14oh no there's another thing
33:16it's just the task
33:17I thought the last task was the task
33:19no that was just prep for the task
33:21oh man
33:24stop the vase from breaking
33:26avoid being hit by the ping pong balls
33:28answer Paul's trivia question
33:30spell the word task in semaphore
33:32catch the ball when Paul throws it
33:34complete the maze on the blackboard
33:36and cut the wire that triggers the confetti
33:38you may only cut one wire
33:40whew
33:43least mistakes wins
33:44you have 40 seconds maximum
33:50last line please
33:51no
33:52last line
33:53no
33:54because it's too much for me to process
34:00oh that was mad
34:01okay there was quite a lot to process there
34:03yeah
34:04so basically a lot of stuff was going to happen very quickly
34:07mm-hmm
34:08uh but we told them what was going to happen and gave them eight minutes to prep for it
34:12yeah which I thought was quite generous of you actually
34:14who are we going to see first
34:16I'm Johnny Knoxville
34:17and welcome to Jack Alice
34:19this is not going to be pretty your time starts now
34:2340
34:2539
34:2638
34:2737
34:2835
34:2934
34:30who was the premiere of New Zealand in 1874
34:33Sir Julia Fogel
34:34mr. Vogel Paul
34:35full name
34:36John Vogel
34:37John Vogel
34:38oh my god
34:52oh
34:53oh
34:54oh
34:55oh
34:56oh
34:57it's anti-climatic
34:58are you happy with that
35:12it's impossible to say
35:14Alice
35:31Alice from you clinical use
35:34I remember Julius Vogel I did the maze expertly I saved the vase
35:39you caught the ball I caught the ball
35:41that was great
35:42so out of the seven things to do she missed the semaphore
35:46and she cut the wrong wire but the rest were correct so she got five out of seven correct
35:50wow
35:51wow
35:52that's unbelievable
35:54and what about Jack
35:55Jack stopped the vase from breaking he dodged the ping pong balls and he completed the maze if you're accepting that
36:02yeah
36:03well what about the seraphore
36:04he wrote um Vammel
36:07who is up next Paul Williams
36:12it's Paxi Van Breek
36:15your time starts now
36:1940
36:2039
36:2140
36:2239
36:2340
36:2439
36:2538
36:2638
36:2737
36:2836
36:2935
36:30oh my god it's like the hunger games
36:3133
36:3232
36:3331
36:3430
36:3529
36:3630
36:3730
36:3830
36:3931
36:4032
36:4132
36:5432
36:5533
36:5634
36:5734
36:5834
36:5934
37:0034
37:0134
37:0234
37:0334
37:0434
37:0534
37:06One.
37:07One.
37:08Two.
37:09One.
37:10Oh!
37:11I did it!
37:12Two.
37:13One.
37:14I've stopped the clock.
37:29It's the wrong one, eh?
37:34I think that went well.
37:37And was the confetti in time?
37:39Yes.
37:40And the semaphore was in time?
37:42Yes it was, in my time.
37:44I think I gave myself a new hemorrhoid cutting that wire.
37:55You gave yourself a new hemorrhoid?
37:58Yeah, to add to the others.
38:01Can I just ask the question?
38:03Yeah.
38:04My semaphores.
38:05Did I actually get two right?
38:07Yes.
38:08You went ta.
38:09Two more.
38:10If you went s and k, then you'd be away laughing.
38:12What was surprising was that Pax Asadi, whose first language was semaphore, didn't even
38:17try that.
38:19Didn't feel like I needed to prove myself in that context.
38:22Yeah.
38:24So that would mean Jackie and Brie both five mistakes out of seven.
38:29Jack and Pax four mistakes out of seven.
38:32And Alice only two mistakes out of seven.
38:34Wow.
38:35Impressive.
38:36One point for Jackie and Brie.
38:37Three points for Jack and Pax.
38:39And five points for Alice Sneddon.
38:42No, stop that.
38:43Stop that.
38:44Right, that's all for part four.
38:46See if you can make a cup of tea, grab some biscuits, fold some washing and squeeze in a wee during the ads.
38:53See you after the break.
38:54Welcome back to Taskmaster.
39:07Now we've just got the one live task to go, but before we get to that, can I have a score
39:13update please, Paul?
39:14We currently have a three-way tie out in front.
39:17It's Alice, Brie and Pax.
39:19Ooh.
39:20Wow.
39:21Lots to play for.
39:23You guys please head up to the stage for the final task of the show.
39:32Okay Paul, who's reading the task tonight?
39:34Brie.
39:35Take your time.
39:37Make the most unique noise.
39:39The Taskmaster will identify which two noises sound the most alike.
39:44The least passionate of these two noises will be eliminated.
39:47Last remaining contestant wins.
39:50You must make your noise with your mouth.
39:52Your noise may not be a word.
39:54You have five seconds to make your noise.
39:56Each round will have a theme that must inspire your noise.
39:59For the final round, the two most similar noises will be eliminated.
40:03And can we clarify, so we're not in teams?
40:06This is just for the placement of the mic.
40:07We freaked out because we were clubbed.
40:08No, you're not in teams.
40:09Thank God.
40:10Oh my God.
40:11Oh my God.
40:12Thank God.
40:13Okay.
40:14The theme for the first round is Wednesday.
40:17Headphones on.
40:19Alice Sneddon.
40:22Three.
40:23Jack.
40:24Jackie.
40:25Ooh.
40:26Ooh.
40:27Ooh.
40:28Caps.
40:29Jeremy, which two sounds were the least unique?
40:34I think it's clearly Brie and Alice.
40:35And who was the least passionate?
40:36Alice.
40:37You've been eliminated.
40:38Right.
40:39Jack.
40:40Jack.
40:41Jack.
40:42Jack.
40:43Jack.
40:44Jack.
40:45Ehhh.
40:46Jack.
40:47Jack.
40:48Jack.
40:49Jack.
40:50Jack.
40:51Ooh.
40:52Jack.
40:53Jack.
40:55Jack.
40:56Jack.
40:57Jack.
40:58Jack.
40:59Jack.
41:00Jack.
41:01Jack.
41:02Jack.
41:03Jack.
41:04Well it's quite hard to argue with that isn't it?
41:12Round 2's theme, Romeo.
41:15Bree.
41:16Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
41:20Jack.
41:26Enough.
41:32Okay.
41:36Jacky Van Beek.
41:38Ooh.
41:48Pax.
41:51It's Bree and Pax.
41:57And Pax is the least passionate.
41:59Because the other two were completely original.
42:01So Pax is eliminated.
42:11You have been eliminated.
42:15For the final round, the two least unique sounds will both be eliminated.
42:20Understood.
42:21The theme is cow.
42:23Brie Tomicelle.
42:37Jack Ansett.
42:44Oh, Regrits.
42:50Jacky Van Beek.
43:02Headphones off, please. Headphones off?
43:06Yes, please.
43:12Jeremy, whose two sounds were the least unique?
43:16Bree and Jacky.
43:18Oh my God!
43:24Well done, everyone. Come on down and we'll score it.
43:31Sit on down, everyone, and let's score that live task.
43:35So, one point for Alice, two points for Pax, three points for Bree and Jacky, and five points for Jack Ansett.
43:43There we go.
43:45So, Paul, where does that leave the scores for the episode?
43:50With a one point win on 16 points, the winner of episode four is Bree Thomassell.
43:56Congratulations on winning a truly horrible collection of items. Please go up and collect your fellow contestants and pending dooms.
44:09So, what have we learned this week? We've learnt the difference between a climax and a cliffhanger.
44:18And we've learnt that when you're breaking out of prison, less people is more.
44:22But most importantly, we've learnt that the winner of this episode is Bree Thomassell.
44:28Thank you so much for watching. We'll see you next time.
44:31We'll see you next time.
44:32Yeah!
44:33Oh, shit.
44:34Yeah!
44:35Yeah!
44:36Yeah!
44:37Boom!
44:38Jesus!
44:39Jesus!
44:40Jesus!
44:41All right!
44:42Yeah!
44:43Yeah!
44:44Yeah!
44:45I tried!
44:46You know what I love, Paul?
44:48I love a montage.
44:49Cue montage!
44:50Oh!
44:51Oh!
44:52Oh!
44:53Oh!
44:54Oh!
44:55Oh!
44:56Oh!
44:57Oh!
44:58Oh!
44:59I don't think this is possible!
45:00Oh!
45:01Oh!
45:02Oh!
45:03That was the most successful moment in the history of this show!
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