- 5 months ago
Matrimony
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00...married.
00:00:01What?
00:00:02Yeah, and I can't marry someone who picks up dog crap for a living.
00:00:05Well, at least I don't pose in my tighty-whities for money.
00:00:07Your place, your mind.
00:00:09I'm not staying in a doghouse.
00:00:11Ahem.
00:00:12Can you guys just keep it down?
00:00:14I have work tomorrow morning.
00:00:16Sorry.
00:00:17Hey, Amelia.
00:00:20Looks like someone needs obedience school.
00:00:23Are you gonna let him talk to me like that, Amelia?
00:00:25You started.
00:00:26Asshole!
00:00:27Crazy bitch!
00:00:28You told her?
00:00:29She's my sister.
00:00:30I don't care.
00:00:31That violates our agreement.
00:00:32How?
00:00:33What the fuck?
00:00:34What?
00:00:35Michelangelo?
00:00:36Don't look at that.
00:00:37You're such a hypocrite.
00:00:38I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:00:39I fucking hate you.
00:00:40I fucking hate you more.
00:00:41How was it?
00:00:42Well?
00:00:43That was the best sex I've ever had in my life.
00:00:45I don't care.
00:00:46I don't care.
00:00:47I don't care.
00:00:48I don't care.
00:00:49I don't care.
00:00:50I don't care.
00:00:51I don't care.
00:00:52I don't care.
00:00:53I don't care.
00:00:54I don't care.
00:00:55I don't care.
00:00:56I don't care.
00:00:57I don't care.
00:00:58Wait.
00:00:59What are you doing?
00:01:00That is an original.
00:01:01I'm so sick of your bullshit.
00:01:03Oh, fine.
00:01:04I'll just hop in my time machine, go back to ancient Rome, and get another one.
00:01:09I don't care about your art, your money, your stupid mansion.
00:01:12You're treating me like shit.
00:01:14Like shit.
00:01:15That's from the Renaissance.
00:01:17You are history's worst nightmare.
00:01:19I tried to make this work with you.
00:01:20We signed a contract.
00:01:21For an arranged marriage.
00:01:23Did you actually think this arrangement would be anything more than a business transaction?
00:01:27You are such a simpleton.
00:01:31Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:01:33Well, at least I'm not a spoiled brat.
00:01:35What?
00:01:36I tried to get along with you.
00:01:37You brought this onto yourself.
00:01:38I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:01:40Right back at you.
00:01:42I fucking hate you.
00:01:43I fucking hate you more.
00:01:45You're looking for more.
00:02:06So, you were arrested.
00:02:09Again.
00:02:10To be fair, we thought it was late, and we'll just swim there.
00:02:15There is a fence around that reservoir.
00:02:18It says here that you broke in using bolt cutters.
00:02:23If I had known you invited me over here to lecture me, I wouldn't have came.
00:02:30Come on, Gucci. Come on.
00:02:32Good boy.
00:02:35Oh.
00:02:40Okay. Come on, Gucci. Let's go.
00:02:42Hey, Amelia.
00:02:45Hey, James.
00:02:50Come on, Gucci. Let's go.
00:02:55You know, every time the paparazzi catch you acting crazy, it reflects on me.
00:03:01It reflects on the company that your mother and I built with our bare hands.
00:03:07The same one that pays for your ridiculous lifestyle.
00:03:10I make my own money.
00:03:12See, see.
00:03:14Underwear modeling, Lord.
00:03:15I am the spokesperson for man-thom.
00:03:18That means free underwear for life.
00:03:20For life.
00:03:21Some parents would be proud.
00:03:23Yeah.
00:03:23Other parents would be prouder if you went to your real job now and then.
00:03:26You are next up to be CEO at Dino Verlino Cosmetics.
00:03:32Now, how can I give you that job if you keep acting like a Kardashian, huh?
00:03:38Job if you keep acting like a Kardashian.
00:03:40I don't forget the meeting this afternoon, all right?
00:03:46And don't be late.
00:03:47Don't forget the meeting this afternoon, all right?
00:03:52And don't be late.
00:03:55Bye, Dad.
00:03:56Excuse me.
00:04:15Hello, my Gucci.
00:04:17Why won't Michelangelo just grow up, huh?
00:04:21He used to settle down and find himself a nice girl, huh?
00:04:24Good one, Romulus.
00:04:46These are great.
00:04:48I still don't have what I'm looking for.
00:04:50Do you guys mind staying a little longer?
00:04:53No problem.
00:04:53Cool.
00:04:54Let's take five, and then I want to see you in that leopard print.
00:05:01Hi.
00:05:03I'm Michelangelo.
00:05:05Chantal.
00:05:05Nice to meet you.
00:05:07I couldn't notice how hot you are.
00:05:11I've got tickets to the premiere...
00:05:14Hold that thought.
00:05:18Hey, Dad.
00:05:19Where the hell were you?
00:05:21Dad, I'm on a photo shoot.
00:05:24You're supposed to be at the office.
00:05:26Geppetto came here all the way from Milano.
00:05:29I can meet him later.
00:05:30No, it's two ladies back on the plane again.
00:05:33Well, you're the one who planned the meeting during my shoot.
00:05:35Michelangelo, you are 31 years old.
00:05:38You've got to stop acting like an idiot teenager.
00:05:40You could be running the world's largest cosmetic company right now.
00:05:43You interned, you went to business school, you have potential, okay?
00:05:49But you say you want to be the CEO?
00:05:52Well, you're going to have to prove it.
00:05:53Because so far, I ain't seen the end date from you.
00:05:58Bye, Dad.
00:05:58Hey, you okay?
00:06:05Yeah, but I'd be a lot better if you'd go out with me tonight.
00:06:09So, it's a really rare form of cancer.
00:06:28Luckily, my doctors did catch it early.
00:06:31There is an experimental treatment, but it's really expensive.
00:06:39And my insurance doesn't cover it.
00:06:41Don't worry about that.
00:06:43I have money saved.
00:06:46I'll find the rest.
00:06:47We will figure this out, okay?
00:06:49We're going to get through this together.
00:06:52Oh, yeah.
00:07:01Ciao, Gucci.
00:07:08Did she have a good walk?
00:07:12What's wrong?
00:07:18I'm sorry.
00:07:20This is...
00:07:20No, no, forget about it.
00:07:21I'm sorry about your sister.
00:07:23The treatments are just really expensive.
00:07:26I have a savings for my doggy daycare.
00:07:29My dream, but...
00:07:32It's only enough for one treatment.
00:07:36And who knows how many she's going to need.
00:07:38Betsy practically raised us.
00:07:41After our parents passed, I would do anything for her.
00:07:46Amelia, I think I might know how to get you that money.
00:07:51You do?
00:07:53Come back tonight and make something nice.
00:07:59Oh, Amelia, you look bellissima.
00:08:14Except for the dog hair.
00:08:17Well, come with me.
00:08:19I have someone I want you to meet.
00:08:22Are they from Italy?
00:08:23Yes.
00:08:24Wow.
00:08:25Yes, of course, everything's from Italy here.
00:08:28Well, Amelia, meet Michelangelo, my son.
00:08:33I believe you both bumped into each other yesterday, huh?
00:08:36Mm-hmm.
00:08:36Yeah.
00:08:37Aren't you the cleaning lady?
00:08:39I'm a dog walker.
00:08:41Don't be so defensive.
00:08:43I wasn't.
00:08:44Well, I suppose I'll let you two get acquainted.
00:08:51I have some unfinished business to do.
00:08:53Why don't you give yourself a glass of vino?
00:08:56Amelia.
00:08:58Arrivederci, huh?
00:08:59Do you want to do me a favor?
00:09:13What exactly?
00:09:21How does it look?
00:09:23Not half bad.
00:09:24I mean, it's fine.
00:09:27Whatever.
00:09:30Let's do some sexy ones, okay?
00:09:33Or not.
00:09:34I don't feel like being your photographer all night.
00:09:37You work for my dad.
00:09:38You have to do what I say.
00:09:39You don't look like Romulus to me.
00:09:42Just a few more pictures.
00:09:44I'm not here to update your Tinder profile.
00:09:46I don't need Tinder.
00:09:47I'm an underwear model.
00:09:49My DMs are flooded like Florida in a hurricane.
00:09:52Whatever.
00:09:53For me another.
00:09:59I told you, I'm...
00:10:00Now.
00:10:04Fine.
00:10:10See?
00:10:11Dog walker.
00:10:12That wasn't so hard.
00:10:16What the fuck?
00:10:18This is fucking product!
00:10:19What the fuck?
00:10:23What the fuck?
00:10:23Oh!
00:10:24Asshole!
00:10:25You crazy bitch!
00:10:30Amelia!
00:10:30Whoa!
00:10:31What's wrong?
00:10:33I asked her to pour me another drink, and she flipped out!
00:10:36I'm sorry, Romulus, but your son is a prick.
00:10:39I'm gonna be leaving.
00:10:39No, no, no, please.
00:10:40I apologize.
00:10:42My son, he's immature.
00:10:44All right?
00:10:44And that's why I invited you.
00:10:47Poor Florida.
00:10:48Please.
00:10:49All right?
00:10:50Just have a seat.
00:10:51All right?
00:10:51And I promise, he'll be on his best behavior for the rest of the night.
00:10:54Won't you, son?
00:10:55So, Amelia needs money to pay for her sister's cancer treatment.
00:11:01Cancer?
00:11:03And you need to settle down and prove that you're worthy of running the family business.
00:11:08Make my own money, Dad.
00:11:11Okay.
00:11:12I want the business.
00:11:14Now, I think we can, uh, make a deal whereby everyone gets what they want.
00:11:20What kind of deal?
00:11:24Well, it's nothing crazy.
00:11:26No.
00:11:27You two just have to get married, that's all.
00:11:30What?
00:11:33What?
00:11:34Romulus, what are you saying?
00:11:36I can't marry the male Paris Hilton.
00:11:38Yeah, and I can't marry someone who picks up dog crap for a living.
00:11:41Well, at least I don't pose in my tighty-whities for money.
00:11:44Well, Angela, look, you have to grow up before you can run our business.
00:11:49And the best way to do that is to get married.
00:11:52We're not even a match.
00:11:53We hate each other.
00:11:54At least I do.
00:11:55Obviously.
00:11:57I see.
00:11:58There's something uncommon already.
00:12:00Look, you know, my wife and I, we were opposites.
00:12:04Oh, yeah, we were like pizza and Hawaiian pizza.
00:12:08She sure drove me crazy when we first met.
00:12:12I know you're probably thinking I'm just some old fool, huh?
00:12:15But I learned a thing or two in 70 years.
00:12:17Romulus, you two have chemistry.
00:12:20Yeah, like a nuclear bomb.
00:12:23As if.
00:12:24Romulus, isn't there another way?
00:12:26I don't want to be miserable for the rest of my life.
00:12:29Amelia, you do want to help your sister, don't you?
00:12:32Or you'll be able to afford the treatment if you just agree to this arrangement.
00:12:36Come on.
00:12:41What's it going to be?
00:12:45What's it going to be?
00:12:49Fine.
00:12:50I'll do it.
00:12:52For Betsy.
00:12:53Well, Angelo, it's not polite to keep a lovely lady waiting.
00:13:01If you're not going to agree to marry her, then you're going to lose the business.
00:13:07And you're also going to lose your inheritance.
00:13:09What the hell, Dad?
00:13:14Fuck it.
00:13:14Fine.
00:13:15I'll do it.
00:13:16Now, let's just go into the office now.
00:13:20The lorries have already drafted the contract.
00:13:23And, son, we are going to need some champagne.
00:13:25You're in my mind.
00:13:28Try and make yourself look decent.
00:13:33You will be engaged for a period of 30 days.
00:13:36Followed by a wedding planned by me.
00:13:39And I'll tell you, it's going to be a big one for the ages, too.
00:13:42I hope the Halloween Bowl's not booked.
00:13:45Anyway, you must move in together immediately to avoid any suspicion, you know.
00:13:50Look, there's nothing wrong with an arranged marriage.
00:13:53But, well, it can't do any good if word got out to the public, right?
00:13:58That's why this has to be our own secret.
00:14:00Are we agreed?
00:14:03Sure.
00:14:04All right.
00:14:05Sign in.
00:14:06Salute to the new couple.
00:14:26So, your place or mine?
00:14:39I'm not staying at a doghouse.
00:14:41Fine.
00:14:42Then we'll stay at yours.
00:14:43So, this is Michelangelo's place.
00:14:56It's like a museum in here.
00:14:58A Michelangelo museum.
00:15:01Ugh.
00:15:01Whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:15:23What was this?
00:15:25Put it in the trash.
00:15:26This isn't trash.
00:15:27These are my sisters.
00:15:28She's an artist.
00:15:30So, put them in your room.
00:15:31I said you could live here, not decorate.
00:15:33Oh, I'm sorry.
00:15:34Is it clashing with your banana hammock?
00:15:37That's man-thong.
00:15:38It's trademarked.
00:15:43Look, I gotta go meet somebody.
00:15:45If this isn't cleaned up by the time I get back, we'll throw it all in the fireplace.
00:15:49It's electric.
00:15:50Oh, by the way, this is gonna work.
00:15:59You might want to start wearing that.
00:16:02Gee, thanks.
00:16:04Welcome.
00:16:11You're getting married?
00:16:13Shh, Betsy.
00:16:15Don't tell the whole world.
00:16:16Sorry, Amelia, it's just, it's not like you.
00:16:22You're saying we're reserved.
00:16:24Safe.
00:16:26Like I always taught you.
00:16:29Well, things change when you find out your sister has cancer.
00:16:34And besides, Michelangelo offered to help pay for some of your treatments.
00:16:38So, I'm okay with the quick proposal.
00:16:41Michelangelo?
00:16:41The Ninja Turtle?
00:16:44No.
00:16:46Michelangelo...
00:16:47Dino Valeno?
00:16:48Maybe you've heard of him?
00:16:51Michelangelo Dino Valeno?
00:16:52Shh!
00:16:57Socialite animals?
00:16:58Like, start a hundred cancel Bravo shows?
00:17:01How did you even meet?
00:17:03His dad is one of my clients.
00:17:06It's been a whirlwind of a romance.
00:17:09He's so toxic.
00:17:14Speak of the devil.
00:17:16Oh, yeah.
00:17:19You know, that's probably an old issue.
00:17:21This is a doctor's office.
00:17:25Amelia.
00:17:27Betsy Carlisle?
00:17:30Doctor's ready.
00:17:32We'll talk about this later.
00:17:33Okay.
00:17:33Ready to get wet, baby?
00:17:56We're already wet.
00:17:59Where did that come from?
00:18:17Nice place.
00:18:18I love the artwork.
00:18:31Thanks, Marlon.
00:18:33I love the artwork.
00:18:35Thanks.
00:18:51No, I'm good.
00:18:53You had plenty at dinner.
00:18:55More for me.
00:18:59You know, if you like it down here,
00:19:02you should see the bedroom.
00:19:03who are you who are you chantel this is amelia my roommate whatever can you guys just keep it
00:19:27down i have work tomorrow morning this is my house we will be as loud as we want to be scream at the top
00:19:36of our lungs you've got to be kidding me what's wrong dog walker he's jealous jealous i'm not jealous
00:19:45sweet dreams
00:19:49i can't believe he said i was jealous how could i ever want to be with a party boy like him
00:20:00even if he is kind of hot
00:20:15see you later and um don't worry about last night sorry i had one too many to drink it won't happen
00:20:30again
00:20:30you better not
00:20:31how's the hangover roomie
00:20:45not now my head's killing me we need to talk about last night
00:20:49no what we need to do is order a three egg omelet and home fries
00:20:52i don't care if you're fooling around with your bimbos monogamy wasn't in the contract
00:20:58but your dad doesn't want people knowing that this is an arranged marriage and you made it
00:21:02pretty clear to that girl last night that you don't care about me
00:21:04fine i'll have her sign an nda just give me my phone
00:21:07my sister needs this money
00:21:10my sister needs this money michelangelo and if the paparazzi find out about this
00:21:18find out about this then the contract is violated then neither of us
00:21:25get what we want yeah no shit i'm serious get what we want yeah no shit i'm serious
00:21:35don't screw this up don't screw this up
00:21:39talk
00:21:42i've been dealing with paparazzi since i was a teenager
00:21:44i've been dealing with paparazzi since i was a teenager
00:21:47i know what i'm doing dog walker
00:21:50i know what i'm doing dog walker
00:21:53And just so we're clear, I will fuck whoever I want.
00:21:56And just so we're clear, I will fuck whoever I want.
00:21:59Whatever I want.
00:22:00Wherever I want.
00:22:02Fine.
00:22:03Do whatever you want.
00:22:05Sorry.
00:22:07It's a bit harsh.
00:22:11Sorry.
00:22:12It's a bit harsh.
00:22:13I'm just really...
00:22:15Really...
00:22:19I'm over.
00:22:21I'm over.
00:22:23That could have gone better.
00:22:27That could have gone better.
00:22:36Hey, baby.
00:22:39Hey, baby.
00:22:41You know, you don't have to keep working, Amelia.
00:22:44You're rich.
00:22:45You don't have to keep working, Amelia.
00:22:47You're rich now.
00:22:49I know.
00:22:49I like it.
00:22:50I know.
00:22:52I like it.
00:22:53Oh, that's good to hear.
00:22:55You know, I just hope that your work ethic rubs off on my son.
00:22:59It rubs off on my son.
00:23:01Tell me, uh, how are things going between the two of you, huh?
00:23:05How are things going between the two of you, huh?
00:23:07Oh, fine.
00:23:09Yeah.
00:23:09We're...
00:23:10Oh.
00:23:13Fine.
00:23:14Yeah.
00:23:14We're still getting to know each other.
00:23:17All right.
00:23:17Well, give him time.
00:23:18We're still getting to know each other.
00:23:20All right.
00:23:20Well, give him time, all right?
00:23:22Oh, and listen.
00:23:23He is not as bad as TMZ says, all right?
00:23:26Look, I...
00:23:27I promise.
00:23:28I wouldn't be so sure.
00:23:30Yeah.
00:23:30You're right.
00:23:32Well, we'll see you later.
00:23:33Yeah.
00:23:34Come on, Gucci.
00:23:35Yeah.
00:23:36Come on.
00:23:36Bye, Gucci.
00:23:40Hey, Amelia.
00:23:41Hey, Jake.
00:23:44Gucci, no!
00:23:45Royce!
00:23:45It's a bad dog, but I'm not actually mad about this.
00:23:51It's to see you up close for once.
00:23:54Yeah.
00:23:54Same here.
00:24:02Sorry.
00:24:03Gucci's, um, a bit crazy.
00:24:06His whole family, actually.
00:24:08All these rich people are nuts.
00:24:10They should make a reality show.
00:24:12We're a little dog owners of Beverly Hills.
00:24:16Do you want to walk together?
00:24:18Let these two get to know each other?
00:24:21Yeah.
00:24:22I'd like to.
00:24:23So, how long have you been a dog walker?
00:24:31A couple months.
00:24:32I like it.
00:24:33I had a bunch of terrible gigs before.
00:24:36Barista.
00:24:37Uber driver.
00:24:39Delivery guy.
00:24:41Movie extra?
00:24:42You were in a movie.
00:24:43Actually, it was a toothpaste commercial.
00:24:45I was trying to impress you.
00:24:47How about you?
00:24:48How long have you been doing this?
00:24:50I don't know.
00:24:51My whole life, I guess.
00:24:53It started as a summer job, and then I've turned it into my own business.
00:24:57I want to open a doggy daycare someday.
00:24:59Wow.
00:25:00I guess you really like dogs.
00:25:02Well, they're easier to hang out with than humans sometimes.
00:25:05If you want to hang out with this human sometime.
00:25:11My band's playing at the Echoplex tonight.
00:25:13Do you want to go?
00:25:14Well, I kind of have to admit, I had a crush on you.
00:25:20You did?
00:25:22Yeah.
00:25:24I still do.
00:25:25He's cute.
00:25:29I wish he'd asked me out before I got legally engaged.
00:25:33Then again, that fuckboy has been out having fun.
00:25:36I'd love to go to the concert.
00:25:41Hell yeah.
00:25:43I mean, uh, regular, yeah.
00:25:46I know it's risky, but I'm not a socialite like Michelangelo.
00:25:53I won't have to worry about paparazzi spotting me at the show.
00:25:57Hey, what's your ring?
00:26:00Um, it's just a class ring from high school.
00:26:04Looks pretty big.
00:26:07It was a big school.
00:26:09Public schools.
00:26:10Am I right?
00:26:14I mean, it kind of looks like an engagement ring.
00:26:19Me?
00:26:20Engaged?
00:26:21No.
00:26:21Are you kidding?
00:26:22I'm 24.
00:26:23I'm practically still a baby.
00:26:25I mean, I should be wearing diapers, crawling around, drooling.
00:26:29Nope.
00:26:30Single and ready to mingle.
00:26:32Okay.
00:26:34Royce pooped.
00:26:38You should pick it up.
00:26:39Where?
00:26:39I don't see it.
00:26:40Just over there.
00:26:43Come on.
00:26:48Do I have to wear a suit every day?
00:26:51Of course.
00:26:52It's an office.
00:26:53You want to be CEO, you got to look the part.
00:26:55You mean like you look like Willy Wonka without the chocolate factory?
00:27:00Very funny.
00:27:01You know I'm retiring next year.
00:27:03Yes, I bet.
00:27:03Yeah.
00:27:03That means you got to get up to speed rapidamente.
00:27:07So today you're going to be my shadow, you'll be my extra hands, and we got a lot to do.
00:27:11Can I get to Starbucks first?
00:27:12Fuck no.
00:27:13Come on, Dad.
00:27:14Help!
00:27:23Oh my goodness.
00:27:25Oh my goodness.
00:27:28Are you okay?
00:27:29Hi, I'm Michelangelo.
00:27:31You're engaged, remember?
00:27:37And this is our new palette.
00:27:43It's Matt's collection.
00:27:45He really liked these colors, so we did them twice.
00:27:46But yeah, that's the presentation for me, Michelangelo.
00:27:54What, Dad?
00:27:54What a day, Dad.
00:27:55It's not even lunchtime yet.
00:28:06Look at you.
00:28:07You got so lazy just sitting around taking pictures of yourself all the time.
00:28:10Just stick with it, will you, kid?
00:28:14Hard work does pay off.
00:28:16Let me just look at Amelia.
00:28:17What about her?
00:28:19She comes from nothing, son.
00:28:20Nobody taught her how to run a business.
00:28:22But she just worked hard.
00:28:23And now, well, now Sharon's money doing what she loves.
00:28:27I guess that's impressive.
00:28:29Yeah, see.
00:28:30See, it is.
00:28:31I hope she rubs off on you a little, you know?
00:28:34I just hope I don't get that uptight.
00:28:42Break's over.
00:28:53Well, not too bad, huh?
00:29:00One day down.
00:29:02Forty more years to go.
00:29:04Hey, hey, hey.
00:29:06Now, this is the time when you go home with Amelia,
00:29:10you talk about the day's work,
00:29:13raise you closer together,
00:29:14comfort each other,
00:29:15just like your mom and I used to do.
00:29:19You know, I'm thinking,
00:29:21it's time for the world to meet.
00:29:24Amelia,
00:29:26tonight.
00:29:28Tonight?
00:29:29Shit.
00:29:30When am I going to tell Chantel?
00:29:32I promised we'd Netflix a bang tonight.
00:29:34The L.A. Zoo fundraiser.
00:29:35Lights, camera, red carpet.
00:29:37Perfect time to announce our lovely new addition
00:29:39to the Dino, Dino, Dino, and Dino.
00:29:43Don't you think it's a bit soon, Dad?
00:29:46I mean, we just signed the contract.
00:29:48What's the matter?
00:29:50You're getting along all right, aren't you?
00:29:51Yeah, yeah, just really starting to warm up to each other.
00:29:56All right, so it's all settled.
00:29:57I'll see you at 8 o'clock tonight in the limo,
00:30:00and don't be late.
00:30:01I'll see you at 8 o'clock tonight in the limo.
00:30:04I'll see you at 8 o'clock tonight in the limo.
00:30:05I'll see you at 8 o'clock tonight in the limo.
00:30:05Why, Dad?
00:30:06Mm-hmm.
00:30:16So, remind me,
00:30:19why are we getting makeovers done again?
00:30:22Because I want to do something nice
00:30:24for my favorite big sister.
00:30:25And?
00:30:28And...
00:30:29You know I never splurge on stuff like this.
00:30:32But, since I'm part of the Dino-Lavino family now,
00:30:35I think I can afford to let my hair down.
00:30:37You better not let that hair down.
00:30:39Sorry, just an expression.
00:30:48How's it going in there?
00:30:50I'm coming out.
00:30:51How's it going in there?
00:31:00Is that bad?
00:31:03I've never seen a dog walker
00:31:05look this hot.
00:31:08Buy that dress.
00:31:09ASAP.
00:31:13Leave me alone, party boy.
00:31:15I've got my own function tonight.
00:31:21I've got my own function today.
00:31:47What are you looking at?
00:31:54You're spilling all over yourself.
00:31:56Oh, thanks.
00:31:56Um, I...
00:31:59Did you forget my name?
00:32:01No, it's just something different.
00:32:05Did you change your hair?
00:32:07Why do you care?
00:32:08The manwhorehouse is yours tonight.
00:32:10I'm going out.
00:32:11I just forgot my charger.
00:32:12Awesome, thanks.
00:32:13I'm taking this.
00:32:18Wait, I've been calling you.
00:32:19We're supposed to go to a fundraiser.
00:32:21I told you, I'm busy.
00:32:23Hold on!
00:32:26Amelia!
00:32:34All right, hey.
00:32:35Look who's right on time.
00:32:37Nice.
00:32:38Where's Amelia?
00:32:40She's sick.
00:32:42She can't make it.
00:32:44Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, no.
00:32:45If your fiancé's sick, you know, you can't go out and party.
00:32:48Yeah, you got to stay home with her.
00:32:50Give her some nice soup.
00:32:53I'll catch both of you for the next one.
00:32:55Tell Amelia that I hope she feels better soon.
00:32:57Poor thing.
00:32:59Okay, Dad.
00:33:01See you in the office.
00:33:08Stupid dog walker?
00:33:09Tricking me with her makeover.
00:33:10I'll teach her to mess with my plans.
00:33:12Hey, it's Michael Langley with Dino Levino.
00:33:23Do you still track people?
00:33:23Wow.
00:33:40Amelia.
00:33:41Hi.
00:33:43You look like you just walked off a runway without a dog.
00:33:47Sorry, I don't come to concerts often.
00:33:51I kind of panicked.
00:33:52No worries.
00:33:53I should have mentioned this is more of a $5 beer kind of place.
00:33:56Yeah.
00:33:57But you're drinking for free tonight.
00:33:59Talk to the bartender.
00:34:00Wow.
00:34:01You like me treatment.
00:34:03You look like one.
00:34:05Thanks, Jake.
00:34:07Hey, lover boy.
00:34:09We're on.
00:34:11Gotta go.
00:34:13Find me in the green room after.
00:34:15Hope you like it.
00:34:16Break a leg, lover boy.
00:34:18Rock stars are so much better than underwear models.
00:34:40All I do is, you know what I want, babe.
00:34:45You know what I want.
00:34:49Good.
00:34:50Nothing from Michelangelo.
00:34:51Maybe he's learned his lesson.
00:34:55One more, please.
00:35:00But that doesn't mean I'm not hooking up with Jake tonight.
00:35:03Jake, you guys were great.
00:35:13You really think so?
00:35:15I just feel like we're ripping off the strokes.
00:35:17The who?
00:35:19You don't know the strokes.
00:35:23Are they older?
00:35:25I'm more of a top 40 kind of girl.
00:35:29It's all right.
00:35:30Lots of stuff to introduce you to.
00:35:31You want something to drink?
00:35:34Yeah.
00:35:41So, when did you learn how to play guitar?
00:35:45Since I was 13.
00:35:47Played in bands all through high school and college, but I feel like this one's finally
00:35:51going someplace.
00:35:52That's awesome.
00:35:53And when I get my record deal, I can finally quit my job, focus on music full time.
00:35:59You're going to quit dog walking?
00:36:00I thought you liked it.
00:36:03I do, but it's just another gig until I hit it big in music.
00:36:07I don't even like dogs that much.
00:36:09I'm more of a cat person.
00:36:11A cat person?
00:36:12Who doesn't like dogs?
00:36:16Even Michelangelo's good with Gucci.
00:36:19I don't want to talk about work tonight.
00:36:22I just want to relax.
00:36:23Have a good time.
00:36:25You're beautiful, you know that?
00:36:27I thought I wanted to hook up with Jake.
00:36:32Now I'm not sure.
00:36:33We have nothing in common.
00:36:35Is it weird that I feel a tiny bit guilty?
00:36:37What the heck?
00:36:42I'm tipsy.
00:36:42He's cute.
00:36:44Michelangelo had his fun.
00:36:45Now I can have mine.
00:36:46Looks like someone needs obedience.
00:37:02What's going on?
00:37:04That's Michelangelo Dina Levino, the Nepo baby underwear model.
00:37:09He's not.
00:37:10You coming with me, dog walker?
00:37:12Don't make me get the leash.
00:37:13What the hell, Michelangelo?
00:37:15Back off, dude.
00:37:17Back off.
00:37:18Grubby little hipster.
00:37:19She's my fiancé.
00:37:20So that was an engagement ring?
00:37:23Jake, I can explain.
00:37:26Let's go.
00:37:26Let's go.
00:37:28I'm really sorry, Jake.
00:37:30I'm not Jake.
00:37:36This is for making me Uber all the way to fucking sober, Mike.
00:37:42And this is for making me listen to Andy.
00:37:43I can't believe you did that.
00:37:51After your high and mighty speech, you're such a hypocrite.
00:37:53Yeah, well, I don't have the paparazzi following me around.
00:37:56Just an Italian-American psycho.
00:37:59I'm not following you around.
00:38:01You know what?
00:38:01I get it.
00:38:02You saw me with Chantel last night, and now you're jealous.
00:38:07Me jealous?
00:38:08Did you see the way that you were acting around Jake?
00:38:10Like, I would ever fuck a dog walker.
00:38:13I am more than a dog walker, you playboy prick.
00:38:15I have a name.
00:38:17Wait, what are you doing?
00:38:19That is an original.
00:38:20I'm so sick of your bullshit.
00:38:22Oh, fine.
00:38:23I'll just hop in my time machine, go back to ancient Rome, and get another one.
00:38:27I don't care about your art, your money, your stupid mansion.
00:38:30You're treating me like shit.
00:38:32That's from the Renaissance.
00:38:34You are history's worst nightmare.
00:38:35I tried to make this work with you.
00:38:37We signed a contract.
00:38:38For an arranged marriage.
00:38:40Did you actually think this arrangement would be anything more than a business transaction?
00:38:43You are such a simpleton.
00:38:47Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:38:49Well, at least I'm not a spoiled brat.
00:38:52I tried to get along with you.
00:38:53You brought this on to yourself.
00:38:54I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:38:56Right back at you.
00:38:58I fucking hate you.
00:39:00I fucking hate you more.
00:39:02I haven't bothered you.
00:39:04I can't believe it.
00:39:19I don't know.
00:39:20I wish I didn't give it up.
00:39:24I don't like this.
00:39:54where am i who's spooning me
00:40:08is that jake how drunk was i
00:40:14michelangelo dog walker
00:40:20oh i forgot we did that last night
00:40:27must have been all those free beers
00:40:30we don't have to talk about this right we had too many drinks
00:40:34just forget it ever happened if that's what you want
00:40:38definitely
00:40:40um i
00:40:43have to go to work
00:40:44i should get up too
00:40:48oh my head
00:40:50just pedialine in the fridge
00:40:53thanks for coming today sis
00:40:56my doctor did say i needed lots of exercise
00:41:00well you look great
00:41:02thanks
00:41:04i don't feel great
00:41:07the treatment's taking a lot out of me
00:41:10you on the other hand
00:41:12are glowing today
00:41:14what's going on
00:41:17so michelangelo and i had sex last night
00:41:20wait for the first time
00:41:24time yeah we're taking it slow michelangelo the male gigolo is taking it slow
00:41:32maybe i did misjudge him
00:41:36and how was it
00:41:40well
00:41:41really bad
00:41:43right
00:41:43i knew it
00:41:44actually
00:41:45it was the best sex i ever had
00:41:48well that explains the glow
00:41:52i am happy for you sis
00:41:56physical chemistry is important
00:41:58that's actually what i wanted to talk to you about
00:42:01i don't get it
00:42:03he and i are nothing alike
00:42:05and yet he knows how to push all of my buttons
00:42:06i feel like
00:42:07like an arcade game
00:42:08and he just keeps getting the high score
00:42:09again and again and
00:42:11you get the picture
00:42:13hey
00:42:15opposite to track
00:42:18i mean
00:42:19that's why you guys love each other so much
00:42:22because you're so different
00:42:24something like that
00:42:26here comes
00:42:36right on the schedule
00:42:37dog walker's in love with me
00:42:39i'll have to let her down easy
00:42:42weird
00:42:43i haven't heard from the dog walker all morning
00:42:45what was that about
00:42:56must be the hangover
00:42:58hey i'd like to hang out tonight
00:43:08maybe we can finish what we started last time
00:43:10hey unfortunately something came up
00:43:25i can't make it tonight
00:43:27why can't i stop thinking about the dog walker
00:43:32and why hasn't she texted me yet
00:43:40i'm not very good with words
00:44:08me neither
00:44:08but last night i
00:44:11you don't have to say anything
00:44:11we both know it was a mistake
00:44:13and we can just go back to hating each other
00:44:16like nothing ever happened
00:44:18i don't think you understand it
00:44:19you just listen to me for a second
00:44:21look
00:44:21you don't have to worry about me catching feelings
00:44:23i'm a big girl
00:44:24i've had a one night stand before
00:44:26i've never been with someone like you before
00:44:29okay i get it
00:44:31i'm not one of your
00:44:32your models or your
00:44:34your d-list actresses
00:44:35you don't have to give me some
00:44:37big speech about letting me down easily
00:44:39i know that if you would take back last night
00:44:42that you would
00:44:42frankly so would i
00:44:44i mean you're driving me nuts
00:44:45you don't understand
00:44:46let's let's get some take out
00:44:48and figure this thing out
00:44:49i don't need you to mansplain my own feelings to me
00:44:53wait
00:44:54did you just call me amelia
00:44:56what happened to dog walker
00:45:01i have a confession to make
00:45:03last night
00:45:07i don't know how
00:45:09i don't know why
00:45:10that was the best sex i've ever had in my life
00:45:14really
00:45:17do i look like i'm lying
00:45:19i'm not a good actor
00:45:20i could even do reality tv
00:45:23but
00:45:24there is
00:45:26a fire
00:45:27between us amelia
00:45:28some kind of crazy
00:45:29cosmic chemistry
00:45:31you sound like you're
00:45:34reading a horoscope
00:45:35amelia
00:45:36please
00:45:38i know you felt it too
00:45:41amelia
00:45:47please
00:45:47don't act like you didn't feel it too
00:45:50i felt it too
00:45:53so why are we fighting it
00:45:58i've been thinking about you all day
00:46:01me too
00:46:20so
00:46:37i set the kitchen on fire
00:46:39how am i supposed to know you're not supposed to light fireball shots on fire
00:46:44it's not my fault
00:46:46they should change the name
00:46:47no wonder they canceled vanderpump's super yacht
00:46:51if you think that's funny
00:46:53just wait till the next episode
00:46:54the captain gets super drunk off espresso martinis
00:46:57and he almost sinks the boat
00:46:58you know
00:47:04when you're not acting like a complete douchebag
00:47:07you're not so bad
00:47:08thanks
00:47:10you know we could actually try this
00:47:14hey if the sex stays this good
00:47:17i'm open for anything
00:47:18i'm serious
00:47:20the wedding's coming up
00:47:22we could give it a shot
00:47:25you mean like
00:47:26you and me
00:47:27together together
00:47:28why not
00:47:30were you planning on marrying someone else
00:47:32oh gucci what's the rush
00:47:48oh
00:47:53hey royce
00:47:55jake
00:47:56how's it going
00:47:58good
00:47:59yeah
00:48:00look the other night was kind of
00:48:03crazy
00:48:03i know
00:48:04i should have told you about michelangelo
00:48:07we were kind of
00:48:09in a fight
00:48:10i'm sorry for bringing you into this
00:48:12is he always like that
00:48:14so aggressive and controlling
00:48:16i couldn't believe the way he just dragged you off like that
00:48:19he was like a caveman lugging home his woman
00:48:22well i am his woman
00:48:24he saw us together and he got jealous
00:48:27and i don't blame him
00:48:29oh my god
00:48:30am i actually sticking up for michelangelo dinovolino
00:48:34i didn't mean a pride
00:48:36just wanted to make sure everything's okay
00:48:39i'm here if you need to talk
00:48:41thanks jake
00:48:43but
00:48:43i'm engaged
00:48:44remember
00:48:45and the only person i want to talk to is my fiance
00:48:48i thought we had a connection
00:48:50you're a cat person
00:48:52it never would have worked
00:48:54come on gucci
00:48:56let's go
00:48:57cats are awesome
00:49:02that was a
00:49:06great presentation
00:49:08the marketing director loved your ideas for the new line
00:49:11you think so
00:49:12ooh
00:49:13maybe i'm finally starting to get a hang of this ceo thing
00:49:16oh yeah yeah
00:49:17now listen
00:49:18i gotta fly to
00:49:19paris for a few days
00:49:21you mind watching uh
00:49:22your little brother for me
00:49:23gucci
00:49:24sure
00:49:24but i mean
00:49:25you know dogs are more amelia's specialty
00:49:27yeah but that's how you impress her
00:49:29you invite her for a romantic date
00:49:32at the dog park
00:49:33at the dog park
00:49:34mm-hmm
00:49:35i just texted her
00:49:36it's all set
00:49:37now
00:49:38go get her lover boy
00:49:41so you just throw it and he brings it back
00:49:54you've never played fetch before
00:49:56it's my dad's dog
00:49:59not mine
00:50:00let me try
00:50:02that's okay
00:50:04that's okay
00:50:04i know you don't want to touch a slobbery ball with your dainty hands
00:50:08do you ever get
00:50:12do you ever get tired of the dog stuff
00:50:15what's the point of working if you never get a chance to have fun
00:50:29what's the point of working if you never get a chance to have fun
00:50:32you're right i should work less
00:50:35if nothing else
00:50:37you're letting me get closer to my little brother
00:50:40fetch gucci
00:50:45i've got a big surprise
00:50:51a surprise
00:50:52just wait and see
00:50:55grazie
00:51:03have a good night mr. De Novolino
00:51:05what's that
00:51:12special delivery from
00:51:14masterione's italian deli
00:51:16but gucci
00:51:19what's your favorite prosciutto
00:51:21you know that's awful for dogs
00:51:25right
00:51:25i thought you were
00:51:27off the clock today
00:51:29besides a special occasion
00:51:31i also thought we could use his water bowl
00:51:35to pour a little chianti into
00:51:36no kidding
00:51:39this is for us
00:51:40why don't you get us a court script
00:51:42what else is in the bag
00:51:44just some imported italian ingredients
00:51:46so i can make you a real italian dinner
00:51:48you can cook
00:51:50that was so good
00:52:05i feel like i just went to italy even though i've never been
00:52:09how did you do this i can't cook
00:52:12at all
00:52:13making italian food is one of my favorite things to do
00:52:15did you learn in culinary school
00:52:17no my mom
00:52:19tell me about her
00:52:21i've never told a girl about my mom
00:52:25sorry
00:52:26i don't mean to pray
00:52:28she passed away when i was eleven
00:52:31breast cancer
00:52:33but i have a lot of good memories of her
00:52:36she grew up in a little village in tuscany
00:52:39and she taught me everything i know about cooking
00:52:42we'd spend hours in the kitchen just cooking and eating and laughing
00:52:47i still have all of her recipes
00:52:51here
00:52:52handwritten in italian
00:52:54that's really special
00:52:55i miss her
00:52:59this might sound corny but
00:53:02i feel a little closer to her when i make her recipes
00:53:06it's not corny
00:53:07but i didn't know you were such a softy
00:53:10just don't tell tmz
00:53:13what about your parents
00:53:15my parents died in a car accident
00:53:18when i was thirteen
00:53:20it's been me and betsy ever since
00:53:23i'm sorry
00:53:24i just really hope these treatments work
00:53:27i don't want to lose her too
00:53:31i'm sorry
00:53:33your story made me emotional
00:53:35i'm gonna go do the dishes
00:53:37i'll help you
00:53:38no no it's fine
00:53:39i like doing the dishes
00:53:41it relaxes me
00:53:42good
00:53:43because i hate them
00:53:44well then i guess we make a good team
00:53:47is it just the wine
00:53:52or am i really falling for
00:53:55him
00:53:56her
00:54:09hey
00:54:10hey
00:54:11hey
00:54:11do you want an espresso
00:54:13i just figured out how to make the machine work
00:54:15no thank you
00:54:17you need to have a morning medium i'm kind of in a rush
00:54:19okay well don't forget gucci
00:54:21how could i
00:54:22ready bro
00:54:25well let me fix your tie
00:54:27what do you know about ties
00:54:30you wear t-shirts to work
00:54:32and you wore man thongs two weeks ago
00:54:35touche
00:54:36there you go
00:54:38okay bye
00:54:39bye
00:54:40love you
00:54:43love you too
00:54:44sorry
00:54:55it's reflex
00:54:56i didn't mean to say that
00:54:57me neither
00:54:58too soon
00:54:59talk about it later
00:55:02yeah
00:55:03okay
00:55:04okay
00:55:05ugh could that have been any more awkward
00:55:08and is michelangelo really in love with me
00:55:11look who's here
00:55:18hey
00:55:18my little guy
00:55:20hey little gucci
00:55:22look at this right here
00:55:24huh
00:55:25let's try
00:55:27oh yeah now here's that
00:55:30here's mine
00:55:31right
00:55:31just like that
00:55:33huh
00:55:33yeah
00:55:34even got one for big brother
00:55:35right there
00:55:37come to papa
00:55:39yes my boy
00:55:40all right
00:55:43all right
00:55:43so
00:55:43we gotta talk about this
00:55:45this wedding right
00:55:46this is two weeks off
00:55:47hollywood bowl
00:55:48they're waiting for an answer
00:55:50and i bumped into
00:55:51chris martin
00:55:52on the plane
00:55:53he says the band
00:55:54is free
00:55:55you like cold play right
00:55:57dad
00:55:57we can't have the wedding
00:55:59at the hollywood bowl
00:56:00cool
00:56:01well all right
00:56:03then we'll book
00:56:04the magic castle
00:56:05how about that
00:56:06not too big
00:56:06plenty of room for cold play
00:56:07huh
00:56:08dad
00:56:09let's just pump the brakes
00:56:10we cannot plan a wedding
00:56:12like this
00:56:12what
00:56:13something wrong with
00:56:14Amelia
00:56:15no
00:56:16everything is great
00:56:17it's better than great
00:56:20honestly
00:56:20but we cannot
00:56:22have a big flashy wedding
00:56:24that's
00:56:25our thing
00:56:26it's not Amelia's thing
00:56:27i think it'd make it
00:56:29uncomfortable
00:56:29wow
00:56:31i never thought of that
00:56:32you know you have a very good point
00:56:36yeah
00:56:36i'm very impressed
00:56:39you've never acted like this
00:56:42with any other woman
00:56:43i can't say i've ever felt like this with another girl
00:56:47sounds like you might be falling in love
00:56:50love
00:56:51yeah
00:56:53i don't know
00:56:55he's cute
00:56:57all right
00:56:58all right
00:56:59change of deal
00:57:00gonna cancel the hollywood bowl
00:57:02all right
00:57:03and then we'll have a nice small intimate affair
00:57:06a wedding
00:57:07with cold play
00:57:08no cold play dad
00:57:10no cold play
00:57:12so
00:57:19it's about my cancer treatment
00:57:22it's not working
00:57:24i know it
00:57:25i talked to my doctors yesterday
00:57:28and i'm cured
00:57:30what
00:57:31you're cured
00:57:33oh
00:57:34congratulations
00:57:36thank you
00:57:37i wasn't expecting it
00:57:39i didn't think i would be cured in only two sessions
00:57:42it only took two sessions
00:57:45i almost had enough in my savings to cover that
00:57:48maybe i didn't need the dina volino's money
00:57:51what's wrong sis
00:57:53we should be celebrating
00:57:55i brought prosecco
00:57:56no
00:57:57yeah
00:57:58no i'm good
00:58:00yeah
00:58:00Amelia
00:58:02i'm your sister
00:58:03you can tell me anything
00:58:05is it michelangelo
00:58:08is everything okay
00:58:10if that punk pretty boy hurts you
00:58:13i will take that man thong
00:58:14and give him a wedgie so far up his butt
00:58:16that it will cut him in two
00:58:18it's not michelangelo
00:58:20Betsy
00:58:21it's me
00:58:24i have to tell you something
00:58:27i cannot believe
00:58:33that they convinced you to do
00:58:34an arranged marriage
00:58:36what is this game of thrones
00:58:39it was the only way that i could pay for your treatments
00:58:41and you know that i would do anything for you
00:58:43actually
00:58:45he's not that bad
00:58:47i kinda like him
00:58:50yeah
00:58:52babe
00:58:52that's called stockholm syndrome
00:58:54we need to get you out of there
00:58:56Betsy
00:58:57i have
00:58:59real feelings for him
00:59:00but
00:59:02what about the tabloid stories
00:59:05you heard what he did to that floozy in disney world
00:59:08they banned him
00:59:10for life
00:59:11you'll never go to epcot
00:59:12he's not actually like the stories
00:59:15or
00:59:16at least not to me
00:59:18he's only acting like that to get into your pants
00:59:21Amelia
00:59:21if you marry michelangelo
00:59:25he will make your life a living hell
00:59:28what if you meet him
00:59:31yeah
00:59:32meet him
00:59:33maybe he'll change your mind
00:59:35maybe
00:59:35maybe you'll actually like him
00:59:37don't count on it
00:59:38please
00:59:39me
00:59:40just give him a chance
00:59:41fine
00:59:43yes
00:59:44only one
00:59:46yes
00:59:46you won't regret it
00:59:50i'm gonna go get the Prosecco
00:59:51you better bring the whole bottle
00:59:55thank you for making dinner
01:00:00of course
01:00:02i'm glad she's cancer free
01:00:04we need to celebrate
01:00:05michelangelo
01:00:08you know that Betsy
01:00:10is the most important person in the world to me
01:00:12right
01:00:13you mean besides me
01:00:14i'm serious
01:00:15it's really important to me that you two get along
01:00:17have a glass of wine
01:00:20tonight's gonna be great
01:00:23it's
01:00:32enormous
01:00:34why would anybody need so much room
01:00:39it's nice to see you too sis
01:00:43nice to finally meet you
01:00:46Betsy
01:00:47hmm
01:00:48so
01:00:50this is the
01:00:51infamous
01:00:53uh
01:00:54michelangelo
01:00:55how about we start off with a glass of champagne
01:01:0096 Dom Perignon
01:01:01Amelia said that's the year that you were born
01:01:03yeah
01:01:05sorry i can't drink that fancy stuff
01:01:07it's worth more than my car
01:01:09why would anybody spend that much on a drink
01:01:11$8.99 at Ralph's
01:01:15it's delicious
01:01:16this was made in France
01:01:19sorry
01:01:20can't touch that stuff
01:01:22so
01:01:23who wants a drink
01:01:25you hardly touch your food
01:01:47it's a little too rich for me
01:01:52mine tastes great
01:01:54so michelangelo
01:01:58i
01:01:58i have some big sister questions to ask about the pernuptials coming up
01:02:03you
01:02:04don't mind do you
01:02:05fire away
01:02:06so i know you two have been having your
01:02:10fun
01:02:12um
01:02:13but
01:02:14what's this relationship gonna look like once that honeymoon phase wears off
01:02:19i don't think it's going to
01:02:23that's cute and all
01:02:24but
01:02:24what about her career are you gonna support her
01:02:27or kids what's your stance on that
01:02:29or are you just gonna
01:02:31jump to the next person once you get bored and this gets too serious
01:02:34Betsy
01:02:34look
01:02:35i know i have a past
01:02:37but
01:02:39i'm committed to it
01:02:40we haven't talked about kids but
01:02:43i'm open to anything
01:02:44see michelangelo that's my point
01:02:46you two are getting married and you barely know each other
01:02:50we know now
01:02:51easy Betsy
01:02:52i just think it's a bad idea getting married this soon
01:02:57and if you really cared about emilia
01:02:59you would give her the time
01:03:01and what makes you such an expert
01:03:03i don't see a ring on your finger
01:03:05michelangelo
01:03:07you probably picked them apart the way you're doing me right now
01:03:10it's no wonder emilia was so uptight when i met her
01:03:11she gets it from you
01:03:12are you gonna let him talk to me like that emilia
01:03:16you started it
01:03:18why don't we all just
01:03:24calm down
01:03:26Betsy's just looking out for my best interest
01:03:28no
01:03:29she's alone and miserable
01:03:30and trying to drag you down with her
01:03:32that's not fair michelangelo
01:03:34she's not been fair to me since she walked through the door
01:03:36you're the horniest bastard in beverly hills
01:03:38and you're a frigid lonely woman who cannot stand to see her sister happy
01:03:41you know what
01:03:42you can't talk to Betsy like that
01:03:44that's my sister she just survived cancer
01:03:46that doesn't give her a right to insult me inside my own house
01:03:53and she can say whatever she wants
01:03:55not to me
01:03:56you know maybe she should be concerned i don't like this side of you
01:03:59see i told you you should have spent more time getting to know each other but i guess the contract doesn't allow for that
01:04:04you told her she's my sister
01:04:06i don't care that violates our agreement
01:04:08oh is that all i am to you
01:04:10a contractual agreement some kind of obligation
01:04:12it's not what i meant
01:04:14it came out wrong emilia
01:04:16i love you
01:04:18you love me
01:04:20don't listen to him he doesn't even know what that means
01:04:22shut the fuck up
01:04:24you know what maybe she was right
01:04:26maybe she was right
01:04:28i shouldn't have signed that contract
01:04:29it's over
01:04:33we need to get out of here
01:04:38i've seen too many true crime documentaries on netflix to know what happens when you tell rich people secrets
01:04:44emilia
01:04:46i know this is hard to hear
01:04:48but
01:04:50you did the right thing
01:04:52you do so much better than him
01:04:54yeah
01:04:56but he isn't a monster
01:04:58i shouldn't have said that
01:05:00we can talk about it on the road
01:05:02get packing
01:05:04and if we leave now we can get to mexico by dawn
01:05:06lay low for a bit
01:05:08mexico
01:05:10or canada whatever
01:05:12it's that or stay here and get sued
01:05:14by the dino lovinos
01:05:16or worse
01:05:18i don't think romulus and michelangelo would sue us
01:05:20i mean
01:05:21i only told you about the contract
01:05:23it's not like i told the media
01:05:25you don't know that
01:05:27we're
01:05:28liabilities
01:05:29loose ends
01:05:31you should listen to more true kind podcast
01:05:36get rid of that thing
01:05:38they could be tracking us right now
01:05:41yeah you know michelangelo did manage to follow me to the echoplex the other day
01:05:45see
01:05:47he could have a sniper on us
01:05:53it's romulus
01:05:54hey romulus
01:05:55what
01:05:57what do you mean gucci's missing
01:05:59what do you mean gucci's missing
01:06:13you came
01:06:15against my better judgment
01:06:17i'm not happy you've been blowing me off
01:06:19i've just been busy
01:06:21but
01:06:23it's over with now
01:06:25you should
01:06:27punish me for straying
01:06:29you make me sick
01:06:31i make me sick
01:06:33nice
01:06:43underwear
01:06:44it's a great craftsmanship
01:06:47you
01:06:49okay
01:06:51let's get this over with
01:06:53is that all you have to say
01:06:55do you even realize how hot i am
01:06:57i'm sorry
01:06:59i thought i wanted this
01:07:03but i don't
01:07:05i'm not the stud that i used to be
01:07:07amelia broke up with me
01:07:09it feels like she's stomping on my heart with one of your shoes
01:07:13never in a million years did i think i'd fall for a dog walk with my hair
01:07:17i am fucking devastated
01:07:19and all her wishes i could take back how i acted
01:07:21i just wanted to come back to me
01:07:23i just wanted to come back to me
01:07:25there
01:07:27it's
01:07:29it's
01:07:31it's
01:07:33it's
01:07:35it's
01:07:37it's
01:07:39it's
01:07:41it's
01:07:43it's
01:07:45it's
01:07:47I
01:07:49Emilia
01:07:51hi dad
01:07:53gucci's gone
01:07:55i'll be right there
01:07:57why
01:08:00promulus
01:08:03what
01:08:05what
01:08:07what
01:08:09well i i only had him off a leash for a second you know
01:08:11we were practically in the house and all of a sudden he just shot off like a rocket
01:08:15He just shot off like a rocket.
01:08:17I've been calling him all night, but he won't come back.
01:08:21Well, we can help you find him.
01:08:24Yeah.
01:08:25Right?
01:08:27Good, thanks.
01:08:29Gucci.
01:08:30This better not be a trap.
01:08:32Just come on.
01:08:35Gucci.
01:08:36Gucci.
01:08:37Gucci.
01:08:38Hey, hey, hey, where's Michelangelo?
01:08:40Huh?
01:08:40I thought you were both together.
01:08:41Why isn't he here with you?
01:08:43Oh, um, he's...
01:08:44Sorry, I'm late, Dad.
01:08:47Where were you?
01:08:48I had to stop for late-night delivery at Mastroianis.
01:08:51It's Gucci's favorite prosciutto.
01:08:53If this doesn't ring out of hiding, nothing will.
01:08:56Smart move, dude.
01:08:58Here, ladies.
01:08:59Take a piece of this prosciutto here.
01:09:00That's it, Dad.
01:09:05Amelia.
01:09:05Gucci.
01:09:17Gucci.
01:09:23It's hopeless.
01:09:24We've been looking for him all night long.
01:09:28We're never going to find him.
01:09:30Don't give up, Dad.
01:09:31He's just off having a little adventure.
01:09:33Keep looking.
01:09:34He'll turn up in a few minutes.
01:09:37See?
01:09:38They're not going to kill us.
01:09:40I do have to admit, though,
01:09:42I didn't expect to see this side of him.
01:09:44He's really there for his dad.
01:09:47His dad's dog.
01:09:49So you approve now?
01:09:51They didn't say that.
01:09:55Gucci!
01:09:55My boy's back!
01:10:08Okay, okay.
01:10:11I'm a little closer to approving.
01:10:14I might have possibly misjudged you.
01:10:27A little.
01:10:29It's okay.
01:10:30Most of what the tabloids publish is true.
01:10:33They just leave out part of the story.
01:10:36Amelia, can we talk?
01:10:41Please?
01:10:42Please?
01:10:44Amelia, can we talk?
01:10:50Please?
01:10:51Okay.
01:11:00Amelia, I'm sorry about earlier tonight.
01:11:05I shouldn't have attacked your sister,
01:11:08and I shouldn't have blown up at you
01:11:09for mentioning the contract.
01:11:10I'm sorry about earlier tonight.
01:11:14I hope that you know you mean so much more to me
01:11:16than just a business agreement.
01:11:20Thanks for saying that.
01:11:22I needed to hear that.
01:11:25And I'm sorry for calling you a monster.
01:11:29You're not one.
01:11:30I'm still learning new things about you.
01:11:33Most of them are good.
01:11:37I'm happy we signed the contract.
01:11:40I'm not.
01:11:44You're not?
01:11:44What do you mean?
01:11:48Amelia, this might sound crazy,
01:11:50but I meant it when I said that I love you.
01:11:55And I don't want some silly piece of paper
01:11:57to be the reason that we stay together.
01:12:01I want to know that our love is real.
01:12:05Dad.
01:12:06What is this, son?
01:12:07I want to cancel the contract
01:12:10between me and Amelia.
01:12:12Why, son?
01:12:14Because I want to ask her to marry me.
01:12:17And not because of some legal obligation,
01:12:22but because she wants to.
01:12:29Consider our contract null and void.
01:12:32Amelia, where will it be?
01:12:44Will you marry me?
01:12:48Will you marry me?
01:12:51Yes.
01:12:52I'll marry you.
01:13:02You've made me the happiest underwear model
01:13:10in the world.
01:13:12And I'm the happiest dog walker.
01:13:15Look at me.
01:13:16I'm dripping like a Roman aqueduct.
01:13:20All right, all right, you two.
01:13:22That's enough, all right?
01:13:24We spent this whole night together.
01:13:26Come over to my place, all right?
01:13:27We'll have a nice breakfast, Italian style.
01:13:30Well, hopefully it's not too rich for you.
01:13:34I think I can get used to it.
01:13:35And then we can all discuss the wedding, all right?
01:13:39I want to hear from everybody involved,
01:13:41especially Coldplay.
01:13:43We're not getting Coldplay, Dad.
01:13:46It was worth a try.
01:14:00And now the bride and groom would like to give their vows.
01:14:14Michelangelo?
01:14:18Amelia,
01:14:20even though we're far from a perfect couple,
01:14:24we're perfect together.
01:14:27I've learned so much from you
01:14:29in such a short amount of time,
01:14:31and not just about dogs.
01:14:34I don't know how I ever managed anything without you.
01:14:40I'm looking forward to your support and counsel
01:14:45as I take over the family business
01:14:48from my father this year.
01:14:49And in return,
01:14:51I promise
01:14:52to be patient
01:14:56and a loving husband
01:14:57as you turn our backyard
01:14:59into the doggy daycare
01:15:00you've always dreamed of.
01:15:06Amelia, you are
01:15:07the only thing better
01:15:09than free underwear.
01:15:12I love you so much.
01:15:13I never thought I would end up
01:15:21with a former man-thong model,
01:15:24but here we are.
01:15:26Michelangelo,
01:15:27you've helped me come out of my shell,
01:15:29and you've taught me
01:15:30how to live life to the fullest,
01:15:31something I hope to do more of
01:15:33on our honeymoon in Italy.
01:15:39And although we haven't spent much time together,
01:15:42it feels like a lifetime.
01:15:43in a good way.
01:15:45I know your mom would be proud of you.
01:15:47Te amo, Michelangelo.
01:15:49I love you.
01:15:50With the power vested in me
01:15:52by Almighty God
01:15:53and the city of Beverly Hills,
01:15:55I now pronounce you husband and wife.
01:15:58You may kiss your bride.
01:16:05Thanks.
01:16:06I'm Betsy.
01:16:10I'm Amelia's sister.
01:16:12I'm Jake.
01:16:14Another dog walker.
01:16:16It's crazy,
01:16:17you know,
01:16:17giving my sister,
01:16:18but I've always been more of a cat person.
01:16:22Me too.
01:16:22I love you.
01:16:23Woo, woo, woo, woo!
01:16:25Stronger faith, class family.
01:16:30Choose in the room, it's a tragedy.
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